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VOL. 40 ISSUE 1 - Thursday, September, 2011


the plant Dawson College 3040 Sherbrooke Street West Westmount, QC, H3Z 1A4 Tel: (514) 931-8731 ext:1115 Copyright 2011

Editorial Staff Editor-in-Chief Dahlia Belinsky Managing Editor Gabe Gilker News Editor Casandra De Masi International News Editor & CUP Liaison Nathalie Laflamme Arts & Culture Editor Carl Perks Features Editor Zac Starke Voices Editor Oliver Nacey Sports Editor Samantha Mileto Graphics Editor Shirel Revah Comics Editor Shirel Revah Head Copy Editor Erica Guth Web Editor Samantha Mileto Super Happy Crazy Fun Page Maricar-Kristine Montes Photo Editor Catherine Dumont

Support Staff Public Relations Casandra De Masi Nathalie Laflamme Business Managers Oliver Nacey Distribution Oliver Nacey Tech Support VACANT Copy Editors Robin Della Corte, Adriana Toro, Anna Frey

Staff Writers Chelsea Harrisson, Ema Kibirkstis, Barbara Madimenos, Gina Tsotas, Brenden Di Vittori, Camila MartinezLisle, Rebecca Perez, Steph Ullman, Robin Della Corte, Stefanie Broos, Adriana Toro, Alexandra Eschweiler, Karl Usakowski, Tyler Russ-Hogg, Melissa Di Lena, Abigail de Burgh Galway


Victor Vargas Villlafuerte

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Letter from the Editor Welcome back Dawsonites, As I write this letter I'm snuggled up in bed beyond exhausted. I have my favourite show playing in the background and my Bulbasaur and Lapras stuffed toys next to me. This is the glamourous life of a Dawson student. We're well into the semester now, if you've been here long enough, you'll have learned the art of doing all your homework in bed, even your calculus homework (which involves way too much equipment) if you're a pro like me. Old students have gone from being somewhat presentable to wearing clothes that are three days old so long as they don't smell like a rat's vomit (if rats could vomit, fun facts!). The book line (barf) is over, not that I would know, I was not waiting in that chaos. Lastly, new students have (hopefully) learned not to stop and stare at the top of the escalator. Apparently first years seem to have some sort of hard on for standing still doing nothing. You see Dawson, it's all about trying to be comfortable and free. No one wants to stand in one place. No one wants to wait in line. No one wants to be shoving past first semester kids to get off the escalator. In the summer, your life is comfortable, even if you're in summer school and working, there's still more freedom. Freedom to get drunk in an alleyway walking around Montreal with a bottle in one hand and spliff in another. Freedom to lie in bed naked till 6 a.m. while watching science fic-

tion. Freedom to go up to your cottage and sit in the peace and quiet of nature. It's all about your freedoms and it's all about how to live comfortably. We find our hang out spot at Dawson whether it be the Atrium, Conrod's, the third floor caf, (is that what we're calling it now? It's the Jew caf, get over it CBC), or the club spaces, or maybe you're one of those who just goes home on five hour breaks. LAME. If you still haven't found a place to be comfortable at Dawson, be sure to visit the Peace Garden built in commemoration for Anatasia De Sousa, for more information about the official opening/unveiling you can check out page three of our News section.

Or if you're missing summer, check out the reviews for Osheaga, Jazz Fest, and Fantasia. Or maybe your life is forever annoying and uncomfortable due to transportation, in that case check out the Feature on page … Point is, get comfortable, you are about to embark on something that can take you two years or five. You'll meet the coolest and worst people. I can promise you that. Have a good week Dawson, be safe :) remember, dumb bitches get no respect. Dahlia "Anna Frey" Belinsky Editor-in-Chief Song of the week: Especially in Michigan - Red Hot Chili Peppers

EDITOR OF THE WEEK N A M E C assie D e M asi PR O G R A M C in /V id /C om SEC T IO N : N ew s... seriou s b u sin ess FA V O R IT E FO O D Steaaak, b eeeeef, lasagn aaaa.... D ESC R IBE YO U R SW A G Sw ag to th e m ax, b ro. W H A T W O U LD D O YO U D O W H EN YO U C A T C H A D A Y O FF: G o to th e d octor... H ow d oes it feel to b e ed itor of th e w eek if you h ad to sin g on glee w h at w ou ld you sin g? Sw agger Jagger... R EM IX! W h ich 'h ey girl ryan goslin g m em e w ou ld su it you r life:T h e on e w h ere h e takes m e to th e gu n sh ow W orst sm ell? O liver's cologn e Best sm ell? A n yon e else's cologn e d o you sm ell? yes, of cu p cakes an d su n sh in e C H O O O O O O C O LA T E or V A A A A A N ILLA ;) ? V an illa! H ow old is Brian Lap u z tod ay? W h o tru ly kn ow s? H e is im m ortal

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3 EDITOR: Casandra De Masi CONTACT: VOL. 40 ISSUE 1 - Thursday, September 8, 2011

Dawson remembers


Peace Garden

KARL USAKOWSKI STAFF WRITER O n Sept.13,2011,D aw son C ollege w ill be com m em orating the fifth anniversary of the shooting that killed A n astasia D e Sou sa an d in ju red 19 others, w ith the creation of a m ural an d th e un veilin g of th e peace gard en in a cerem on y op en to all stu dents and staff. A ll activities w ill take p lace betw een 9 a.m .and 1 p.m . w ith the creation of th e m u ral in th e m orn in g an d th e in au gu ration follow in g afterw ards. The m uralconsists of over 300 tiles w h ich stu d en ts an d facu lty are in -

Photo Credit: Catherine Dumont

vited to fill in. T he m ural w ill be assem bled in th e atriu m across from the snack bar and is open to all betw een 9 an d 11 a.m . O n ce th e tiles have been signed,the D e Sousa fam ily is expected to fill th e rem ain in g tiles. Representatives from m any different levels of governm ent have been in vited , in clu d in g Prem ier Jean C h arest, M ayor G erald T rem blay, and representatives from the U nited N ation s. Stu d en ts in ju red in th e shootings w ill also attend, as w ell as form er student governm ents and the D e Sousa fam ily them selves. T h e cerem on y w ill take p lace on th e w est law n of th e C ollege’s cam p u s. T h ere w ill be th e u n veilin g of

the U N ESC O peace pole by Rev.D eborah M oldow and the presentation of a sacred w hite eagle feather by A lgonquin elder D om inic Rankin. T he Police C hief along w ith the H onour G uard w ill be unveiling a dedication m arker. T his is in recognition of the original tree that w as planted on th e first an n iversary in m em ory of D e Sousa.T he cerem ony w illcom e to a close w ith the help of a m usical in terlu d e by stu d en ts lead in g in to the m om ent of silence at 12:41 p.m ., the tim e the shooting began. T h e D aw son Studen t U n ion (D SU ) believes th at th is even t is very im p ortan t an d h op es to see m an y atten d . “M ost stu d en ts still h ave an attachm ent to the tragedy. T his cer-

em on y w ill celebrate ou r valu es of peace, safety and love,” D SU D eputy C h airp erson M ira K atz said . “It is great to see that people have put in a lot of care and love into the garden. It is a w ay for u s to celebrate life,” she added. “I think it`s very im portant for our college not to forget that day and the lives and dream s it took w ith it.I w ill certainly attend this cerem ony,” A nd rei Pavlov, a first sem ester C om puter Science student said. “T h e Peace G ard en solid ifies th e com m unity.It’s a m em o to us that as a com m u n ity w e are stron ger. A ll D aw son ites n ow h ave a rem in d er,” said K enevin Parent,a fourth sem ester Independent Studies student.

Warm and wild welcome

Free smoothies!

STEPHANIE ULLMAN STAFF WRITER D aw son Stu d en ts w ere given a w arm w elcom e back for the Fall2011 sem ester as th e D aw son Stu d en t U nion (D SU ) planned a w eek’s w orth

Photo Credit:Catherine Dumont of events from A ug.24 to Sept.2,givin g stu d en ts a ch an ce to m eet n ew p eop le, p rom ote sch ool sp irit, an d eat to their heart’s content. “D aw son d in in g,” a ch an ce for D aw son students to eat healthy free food an d learn to cook kicked off w elcom e w eek. A free con cert at La

T u lip e h ead lin ed by Plan ts & A n im als w as th e closin g even t. D u rin g the rest of the w eek, the D SU organized variou s even ts su ch as m ovie screenings, a pub craw l, and an outd oor graffiti sh ow case, as w ell as m any opportunities to eat free food. T h e th em e of th is year’s w elcom e

w eek w as “T h is is you r sch ool,” according to D SU D eputy C hairperson M ira K atz. T h e goal beh in d th e events w as “taking over w ith colour,” K atz said.“In a non-aggressive,vivid, an d creative w ay,” sh e ad d ed . Zoe W orsnip,D irector of Student Life for the D SU ,described it as “[T aking] an artistic stand.” The graffitishow case w as the event th at best rep resen ted th e D SU ’s vision of th e th em e an d its m ean in g, according to K atz. T he D SU brought in artists to p ain t m u rals an d en cou raged stu d en ts to join in . T h e event w as held outdoors and also featured live D J’s. “It w as all about takin g over th e sp ace w ith colou r an d life,” K atz said. “T h at w as w h at w e w ere aim ing for.” T h e A u g. 25 scaven ger h u n t is a yearly even t, but th is year th e D SU decided to m odernize it to prom ote creativity.Instead of collecting item s on the list,participants took pictures of the things they had to find. Toast and Jam ,w hich took place on Sep t. 1, w as also a recycled id ea. H ow ever, it w as m uch m ore successfu l th is year. “W e h ad actu al jam m ers, not just toast,” K atz said. Yi Lu, a third-sem ester G eneral Social Science student, attended “Yoga & Sm oothies” on Sept. 1. “I appreci-

the plant who’s excited for RB’s visit? well, I sure theam! plant thethe plant plantthe plant theplant plant whatever the plant the plant theparty? plant the plant as long Hey asNow i canHey beat Now!. justina belieber to THIS IS WHAT DREAMS ARE MADE OF the line...the happened to that CLAP pizza

D on n a V arrica, C oord in ator of C om m un ication s at th e C ollege, believes that the peace garden serves as a rem inder of the prom ise of “peace and non-violence” that w as m ade on the first anniversary of the shootings. “[It’s a prom ise] to the spirit of A nastasia D e Sousa, a young w om an w ith am bition and w ho breathed life into every breath,and to the courage and stren gth of everyon e w h o w as touched by w hat happened five years ago,” V arrica said. Allare invited to com e to the eventbut only 250 chairs w illbe laid out.For those arriving too late there w ill be plenty of space to stand. Students are invited to bring um brellasin case ofrain.


ated that [the sm oothies] w ere free,” h e said . “T h e organ izers w ere also very frien d ly an d w elcom in g. T h ey called m e over from 100 yard s aw ay!” H e ad d ed th at h e w ou ld attend a sim ilar event in the future. W hile the w eek as a w hole w as successful, som e even ts did n ot garn er m uch attention. “W e defin itely h ave taken n ote of w hat w orked w ell and w hat didn’t,” M ia Pearson , D SU D irector of C om m u n ication s an d M obilization said . She added that events that took place in the evening on parts of the cam pus that are m ore secluded, such as the m ovie screenings,did not receive a high turnout. O verall the D SU is happy w ith the p articip ation level, in clu d in g th e closing event, Plants and A nim als at La T ulipe “Everyon e w h o h elp ed ou t at th e con cert is still jazzed abou t h ow buzzin g an d boom in g it w as,” Pearson said . “I’d say orien tation w as a m ission accom plished.” “If Ilearned one thing,it’s that people are m ore w illing to get involved than they let on,” K atz said.“A s soon as you start talking to them ,you find th at th ey’re en th usiastic as lon g as you give th em a ch an ce an d sh ow them that they’re in a safe space.” i am an amazing autotuned singer too

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“I feel like a locker is something the school should supply. Lockers should be free,” third semester Cin/Vid/Com student Stefanie Occhionero said. A sea of lockers

Photo Credit: Victor Vargas Villafeurte


T he population at D aw son C ollege has yet again risen w ith the start of the Fall2011 sem ester,and the grow ing num bers have been the cause of frustration for students seeking lockers. A s stu d en ts tried to register for their lockers online, the D aw son site continued to notify m any that there w ere n o lockers available. “Peop le told m e th at th ere w ere n o m ore lockers left,” th ird sem ester C in /V id /C om stu d en t D erek D ea said. “O ur online registration had troubles because it w ould tell som e people that there w asn’t any lockers left, bu t it w as an error,” Pau l R astelli, Student Services coordinator, said. R astelli states th at th ere are ap p roxim ately 40-50 lockers left in w h ich 100 stu d en ts can fit in sin ce th ese lockers can be sh ared . H ow ever,Rastelliis aw are that despite the 100 students that w ill eventually get these lockers there w illstillbe a lot of students left w ithout one. “I sign ed u p on lin e an d gave m y frien d th e access cod e bu t it d id n ’t w ork w hen he tried. It w asn’t w orking online so I had to do it in person at D aw son,” third sem ester SocialSciences student A lejandro Lopez said. Lop ez ad d ed th at “it took [h im ] an h ou r an d a h alf to w ait in lin e an d get [his] locker.”

Crazy for corn

“T h ere are n o p lan s yet for n ew lockers becau se sp ace is an issu e since there is not a lot of room left to m ake lockers,” R astelli said . A d d itional lockers have also been added in the PepsiForum ,but these lockers are on ly for A ttestation of C ollegial Studies (A EC ) students. Stu d en ts also h ad to p ay a $5 locker fee,w hich is now non-refundable despite being refundable in previou s years. “I feel like a locker is som ething the school should supply. Lockers should be free,” third sem ester C in /V id /C om stu d en t Stefan ie O cchionero said. H ow ever,som e students,like third sem ester A rts an d C u ltu re stu d en t M egan Lau zier, d id n ot m in d it. “I w as surprised by the fee but did not th in k it w as th at big of a deal,” sh e said. “I’m curious [about] w here the m oney [is] going,” third sem ester Social Scien ces stu d en t K evin Barn es said. Rastelli confirm ed that the m oney from th e locker fee w ill be p u t tow ard s th e rep lacem en t of d am aged locks, the reparation of lockers, and to com p en sate stu d en ts w h o h elp clean ou t th e lockers at th e en d of every year.



EDITOR: Casandra De Masi CONTACT:

VOL. 40 ISSUE 1 - Thursday, September 8, 2011



“There wasn’t a ton of people here today, but it’s okay. We still made money, so it was worth it,” Paige Goldberg, third semester Graphic Design student, said.

Students enjoying the food and company D aw son ’s an n u al corn roast, organized by Student A ffairs, w as held yesterd ay aftern oon , righ t by th e Peace G ard en , in ord er to w elcom e new and returning students. T h e even t w as a su ccess. D esp ite th e p ossibility of p recip itation , ap proxim ately 500 people cam e to eat roasted corn, grab freebies and particip ate in activities as th e m u sic played to kick off the new sem ester. T h e corn w as bein g sold for 50 cents a cob. O ther kiosks shared inform ation on the school’s m any clubs an d su p p ort services. A stral M ed ia

Photo Credit: Maricar Kristine-Montez also h ad th eir ow n kiosk to take in those w ho w ere interested in certain jobs. M an y tables w ere set u p for creative activities th ey h ad organ ized , such as graffitiing blank t-shirts,getting caricatures done,cupcake decorating, am ong others. T he cupcakes w ere sold for a dollar each.Funds raised by this activity w illgo to the vernissage com ing next June for the graduating G raphic D esign students.“T here w asn’t a ton of people here today, but it’s okay. W e stillm ade m oney,so it w as w orth it,”

Paige G old berg, th ird sem ester G raphic D esign student, said. Billi-Jo Poirier from Student A ffairs, w as still satisfied w ith th e tu rn ou t, an d h op es to fin d d ifferen t ap proach es to let th e w ord out to th e public. “Students don’t really go out an d give it a sh ot w h en th ey h ear th at it’s goin g to rain ,” sh e said . “A lso, I ju st p u t ou t th e m essage [rain d ate recru it] on M yD aw son so that m ight have been a factor.” H ad it rained,the date w ould have been pushed back by a day. A m essage w as posted on M yD aw son to re-

cruit potentialcrew for the rain date, but no nam es show ed on the sign up sheet. This year,they w illbe looking into recruitm entm ethods and w ays to advertise these sort ofevents efficiently to attract a larger crow d,rain or shine.

the plant Firstthe plant the plant the plantthe thehappening plant WIN the plant issue i’m not is bipolar, the corn i’m roast bi-winning happening??? win plant here, winI think thereit’s ... the WIN plant EVERYWHERE Ryan Gosling and dirty dancing.....

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We have liftoff



“It m ight be a good w ay to create a lin k betw een stu d en ts,” R ach el Poch at Sellay, a th ird sem ester C reative A rts student said. T h e site w ill h ave a d ifferen t them e every year, chosen by the coordinators. “T his year it’s the future so w e’re trying to get the w hole college to en gage in to a d iscu ssion about the future,” K atz said. Students have begun taking part in d iscu ssion s. O n e of th e sites m ain w riters,D anielle T etrault,is a form er D aw son nursing student.“Regardless of w h eth er I w as atten d in g SPA C E talks,or taking part in a SPA CE event, th ere w as a p late of kn ow led ge offered to m e and depending on w hat I w as h un gry for th at day could select w hat I w anted to connect w ith,” she said. T etrau lt believes th at th e w ebsite teaches people how to take controlof their learning. “[T he site] it is about the slow cum ulative learning that occurs,the creation of connections and n eural path w ays in your brain th at fire and excite you,” she said. T o take p art in th e d iscu ssion or sh are you r ow n creative w ork visit space.daw site is also looking for people to w rite,edit, draw ,take pictures,or podcast.If interested , con tact Jiri T u cker at Jiri.T u cker@ gm or A n d rew K atz at akatz@


“Dawson now has a magazine where students in any discipline can share work beyond the classroom...” Andrew Katz Patrick Shearing

VOL. 40 ISSUE 1 - Thursday, September 8, 2011

D aw son ’s recen tly lau n ch ed S.P.A .C .E w ebsite serves as an in tellectu al an d creative foru m ou tsid e the classroom , allow ing students to share and receive feedback on their creative p rojects, n o m atter w h at area of study they are com ing from . T h e site is fun ded by th e Studen t Su ccess A ction Program (SSA P) an d w as coord in ated by A n d rew K atz, Joel T rudeau, Jiri T ucker and Frank M ulvey.JoelTrudeau,the site’s m ain coord in ator, began w orkin g on th e p roject tw o years ago w ith A lexey Soklov, now a D aw son graduate and M cG ill student. Trudeau originally started the project because he felt that students w ere learning w hat they w ere being taught in textbooks,but not the background behind the inform ation in those textbooks. K atz believes it is a great opportun ity for stu d en ts, con sid erin g th at not m any C olleges have this kind of platform . “D aw son now has a m agazine w here students in any discipline can sh are w ork beyon d th e classroom . It can be w ork that relates to stuff they’re doing in the classroom but it can also relate to independent interest,” K atz said. K atz said th at th e w ebsite is “really easy to u se an d p u blish stu ff onto.” H e hopes that this site w ill encourage students to share their w ork. “I think that [the site] is a good idea, [it] gives people a chance to express w h o th ey really are,” M egan Lefran çois, a th ird sem ester V isu al A rts student said.




Dress code discrimination

sp eak u p . T h at's w h at's n ext.”

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“I see why it could happen, but I think it is ridiculous,” DSU chairperson, Audrey Devault, said. “Discrimination by sight is not justifiable.”

Photo Source: CBC

ally su rp rised ,” M aya M ou faw ad , a th ird sem ester G rap h ic D esign stu dent said. T he dress code dilem m a w as also surprising to students. Bahara Seif,a third sem ester A rts and C ulture student said, “ I w asn’t w earing form al d ress cod e an d th ey let m e in n o problem .” D espite the boycott,som e stu d en ts w on ’t be qu ittin g th e bar an ytim e soon . “It w on ’t preven t m e from goin g to th e bar, I’m sceptical abou t th e story bu t if I see it firsth an d I w ill d efin itely recon sid er going there,” G abrielFavreau,a third sem ester C in/V id/C om student said. T h e “Boycott Le bar Sain t Su lp ice” cam paign page on Facebook has received a p ositive resp on se. D . Lalla w rote, “Just w anna put it on record that I didn’t start this group, or ask anyone to create it either.This is how Pow er-FU LL th e resp on se h as been from people w ho have gone through a sim ilar situ ation an d h ave h ad EN O U G H . 1love.” D . Lalla en ded h is in terview w ith CBC radio by stating that the incident “w as d efin itely a blain case of d iscrim ination.” H e also p u b lish ed a letter o n Faceb o o k o n Sep t. 5 , statin g th at after 2 0 in terview s w ith d ifferen t m ed ia o u tlets th ere h as still b een n o resp o n se fro m th e b ar. A cco rd in g to D . Lalla’s letter “w e all n eed to

EDITOR: Casandra De Masi CONTACT:

Tristan D. Lalla

T h e D aw son Studen t U n ion (D SU ) p u blicly d eclared th eir su p p ort via Facebook of th e boycott again st Le Saint Sulpice bar on St-D enis follow ing a D aw son graduate and M ontreal actor’s refused entry on A ug.24 due to his choice of clothing. A ccording to the M ontrealG azette, “th e grou p of 30, in clu d in g blacks, w as refu sed en try by tw o bou n cers becau se of th eir ‘h ip -h op style.’” T ristan D . Lalla, th e D aw son grad uate, w as part of the group. “I w as actu ally w earin g a black t-sh irt an d black jeans,” he said in an interview w ith C BC rad io. “I h ave seen blacks and w hites dressed hip hop style in the bar before,” D . Lalla added. A fter the story broke out, the D SU posted the C BC radio article on their Facebook page and w rote,“T he D aw son Student U nion has officially endorsed the 'Boycott Le Saint Sulpice' cam paign and w illbe w riting an open letter about racial profiling in M ontréal bars & clubs.” “I see w h y it cou ld h ap p en , bu t I think it is ridiculous,” D SU chairperson, A udrey D evault, said. “D iscrim ination by sight is not justifiable.” T h e m an ager of th e Sain t Su lp ice h ad n o com m en t on th e su bject. H ow ever, a barten d er d id agree to com m ent.“C learly w e don’t do racial profilin g if I’m A sian an d th e oth er bartender is A frican-A m erican,” she said. “I know that as a private establish m en t, th ey’re allow ed to refuse en try becau se of h ow you are d ressed , I’ve w orked in m an y oth er clubs,” she added. M an y D aw son stu d en ts w ere sh ocked abou t th e story. “I w asn ’t aw are of the story but I’m actually re-

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6 EDITOR: Nathalie Laflamme CONTACT:

VOL. 40 ISSUE 1 - Thursday, September 8, 2011

Fast-food and the furious Fabulous foreskins Subway employees are people too BriDget DUqUette THE FULCRUM O T T A W A (C U P) I begin every d ay in tears.“Six-inch or foot-long?” Iask, m y eyes red an d w atery, m y face flu sh ed . N obod y seem s to care or even really n otice. I su p p ose tears seem p erfectly ap p rop riate on th e face of a fast-food em p loyee. W h y shouldn’t I be m iserable? It’s fitting m u ch m ore so th an m y gru n gy, illm ade uniform .This outfit turns even the m ost attractive fast-food w orker into a m ound of shapeless flesh.G od forbid any custom er notice that there is a person buried under m y uniform or think of m e as a realhum an being w ith thoughts and feelings. So w hat if m y tears are only caused by the bag of onions I have to chop each m orn in g? M y cu stom ers d on ’t know this. For all they know , I could have tw o w eeks left to live.I could be on the run from the m ob.M aybe m y ham ster just died. You know w hat goes through m y m ind w hen Isee a fellow hum an being in tears? “Is this person suicidal? Should I offer som e kind w ords of support, or m aybe leave a quarter in

their tip-jar?” I like to believe I have som e kin d of basic h um an com passion . M aybe m y custom ers do too, but they do an am azin g job of h id in g it. A s far as I can tell, th e on ly th in g th at in terests them in the least are their iPhones. “H ey,check out m y new app! It enables m e to com pletely block out the outside w orld, thereby m aking low ly fast-food w orkers feel like the scum of the earth. W hat fun!” M aybe Idon’t deserve their sym pathy. I know I’m not the m ost charism atic person. I scow l w hen som eone asks m e to change m y gloves before m akin g th eir food, an d perh aps m y eyes do roll back in m y head w hen a custom er dem ands m ore olives (“N o, m ore th an th at. M ore. M ore. M ore. Even m ore!”). You see, w e fast-food w orkers are ap p aren tly bein g p aid $10.25 an h our to put on a perform an ce. It is su p p osed ly m y job to act like I am not a real hum an being that I don’t h ave em otion s, th at I d on ’t get offen d ed w h en p eop le lou d ly gab on the phone instead of asking m e how m y day is going and that I don’t get an gry w h en som eon e w alks aw ay w ithout saying “thank you” after I serve them . “You are w elcom e,” I’ll yell after them a big m istake on m y part. I should approach every shift the sam e w ay M eryl Streep readies herself for a role.G et into character.Pull m y baggy uniform on over m y head. Tighten my apron. Straighten m y visor. Stand up straight.A nd finally the pièce de resistance force a sm ile onto m y face. V oila:I’m ready for m y close-up. I’m sorry, bu t n o. I refu se. If I w ere gettin g paid tw ice as m uch as I am , I w ou ld be th e p erkiest

amelia CalBry-mUzyka THE CORD

s a n d w ic h artist on the planet. I’d tap d an ce for th e cu stom ers, sh in e th eir sh oes, an d op en -m ou th kiss everyone w ho upped their order to a com bo.N o problem .But Iam not gettin g paid $20 an h our, an d I refuse to sm ile for anybody unless they deserve it. I w ill prepare your food for you. I w ill give you your food in exch an ge for cu rren cy. A n d th at’s about all you’re going to get. Yes,Iam bitter.A lot of us fast-food w orkers are. Ju st try to rem em ber that w e’re not m ad at you as a person;w e’re m ad at you as a custom er. W e’re m ad w hen you ignore us w hen w e say “hello,” yet still dem and special treatm ent. W e’re m ad that w e’re being paid m inim um w age, that our boss is a psycho and that this is our 20th day of w ork in a row . T h e n ext tim e you com e in to get your six-inch chicken teriyaki,try to p ry you r eyes aw ay from you r phone. I know it’s trendy, shiny and fabu lou s, bu t ju st try to m ake eye con tact w ith th e person beh in d th e cou n ter (th at’s righ t p erson ) an d note the tired look in their eyes. T ry to be nice, or even just polite. D on’t yell. D on’t scream . D on’t bark at us.Just treat us like hum an beings. In exch an ge, you can exp ect a gen uine sm ile,a little light conversation and m aybe even extra olives. D eal?

Poop still OK

making people stupider one “P” word at a time Vanessa annand CUP Opinions Bureau Chief C A LG A RY (C U P) — It's a tough tim e for w ords beginning w ith “p.” “Pu rsu an t,” “p rom u lgate,” “p reclud e” an d “practicable” h ave been banned by the U nited States governm ent in docum ents produced for the public. T he already lim ited usage of th ese w ord s w ill p robably d im in ish or d rop off en tirely because of th is m ove to zero fat, plain language. I w orry that “perpetuity” m ight be next on that alliterative hit list.Som e w ould argue that you could just say som eth in g w ill “last forever” rath er than “exist in perpetuity.” But perpetuity packs m ore punch. “Perpetuity” conveys a solem n perm anence. It's the bait on the end of h u m an ity's tim elin e. T h e w ord assures us not only that som ething w ill exist forever,but that “forever” itself actually exists.Perpetuity is a sturdy n oun ; forever, a m ere adverb or, at

best,a “quasi-noun” according to the O xford En glish D iction ary (an d according its usage in the previous sentence). Pitting synonym s against one another m ay seem trite. But recently, I found m yself considering the bigger picture and the greatest differences in denotation. Like “truncation” versus “perpetuity.” W hen you apply these w ords to life — to one w om an's life,especially — degrees of m eaning m atter. A lm ost exactly th ree years ago, a young journalist w ho w orked at a CU P paper, T h e W eal, h ad h er life trun cated in a m ultiple m urder-suicide that left the city of C algary reeling. T h e frien d s an d fam ily of A m ber W ebb-Bow erm an resp on d ed by buildin g som eth in g th at w ould last. Som ething in perpetuity. T he A m ber W ebb-Bow erm an Foundation sponsors scholarships at five u n iversities to aid stu d en ts in terested in journalism and the arts. O n M ay 26,the A m ber W ebb-Bow erm an Fou n d ation an n ou n ced th at th e

Circumcision to be ilegalized for kids

$1,000 sch olarsh ip it aw ard s an n ually at the Southern A lberta Institute of Technology is now an endow m ent. N o m atter w hat happens to the foundation, the $28,500 it has presented to SA IT ensures the aw ard w illlive on indefinitely.Infinitely.In perpetuity. T hat certainty w ill affect not only th e lives of in n u m erable stu d en ts, but the healing of those affected by W ebb-Bow erm an's passing. W ebb-Bow erm an's m other told m e that she w as apprehensive about the foundation starting a scholarship program .She thought at the outset,“If it drops off in tw o years,it didn't w ork.” Butithas w orked.And w illcontinue to. If a w ord or a language can call to m ind not just denotations or connotation s, bu t p ow erfu l an d even painful recollections of a loved one, h ow w ary sh ou ld w e be of lim itin g our vocabulary? Lan guage, alth ough n ot com parable to a h u m an life, d oes take on a life of its ow n. It is not any person's or governm ent's place to curtail it.

W A T ER LO O (C U P) — O n N ov. 8, residents of San Francisco,C alifornia w ill be votin g on an issu e th at h as raised a num ber of strong voices and opinions.Since reaching the required 7,100 signatures in M ay,the N ovem ber ballot is set to include a proposal for a circum cision ban, w hich w ould m ake it “unlaw ful to circum cise, excise,cut or m utilate the w hole or any p art of th e foreskin , testicles, or penis of another person w ho has not attained the age of 18 years.” A nyone found violating this w ould face up to one year of jailtim e as w ell as a $1,000 fine. T he only exception to th is ru le w ou ld be for circu m stances w here circum cision is the last available treatm ent option in m atters relating to the physical health of the in d ivid ual. Sh ould th is ban take effect, you n g boys w ou ld be saved from an unnecessary procedure they are incapable of consenting to. T his groundbreaking proposal has received a num ber of objections, all of w h ich can be n arrow ed d ow n to tw o m ain points — health and freedom of religion. Both of these objections provide insufficient reasons for m aintaining the status quo and disregard th e fact th at circu m cision , w ithout m edical necessity or the ind ivid u al’s con sen t, is n oth in g less than m utilation. Routine neonatal circum cision w as ad opted in th e U n ited States in th e late 19th century to prevent or treat a n um ber of h ealth con dition s, in cludin g everyth in g from m en tal illn ess an d tuberculosis to excessive m asturbation and blindness. T oday, routine circum cision is generally perform ed for so-called hygienic reasons, w ith th e perception th at an un circum cised penis is an unclean one. W h ile th e u n circu m cised p en is does indeed require a slightly m ore th orou gh clean in g, th ere is n o evid en ce th at p roves a circu m cised p en is is m ore h ygien ic th an an u n circum cised one.In addition,studies to determ ine w hether or not an uncircu m cised m ale h old s a h igh er chance of contracting penile cancer and/or urinary tract infections have been in con clu sive. T h e on ly h ealth benefit to circum cision w as found in a 2005 ran d om ized con trolled trial in South A frica, w h ere it w as foun d th at circu m cised m en in th at area w ere 60 p er cen t less likely to con -

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tract hum an im m unodeficiency virus (H IV ) through heterosexual sex than u n circu m cised m en . T h ese resu lts have been replicated in sim ilar trials conducted in K enya and U ganda. T hese trials only serve to show the poten tial ben efit of circum cision in sub-Saharan A frica, w here there are high rates of heterosexual transm ission of H IV , p artially as a resu lt of low con d om u se. In in d u strialized countries like the U nited States, H IV is not nearly as prevalent and sexual ed u cation an d birth con trol are w idely and easily available. T he justification for circum cision in term s of health benefits sim ply does not hold. Som e argue that a ban on circum cision w ou ld be a violation of th e first am endm ent of the U nited States Constitution,w hich protects the right to freedom of religion from governm ent interference. C ircu m cision h as a lon g religiou s history, specifically w ith Jew ish and M uslim faiths.A s a result,som e have com e to view the ban as a direct attack on their right to freedom of religion , fearin g th at a circu m cision ban is ju st th e first step in an u p com ing attack on their religious practices as a w hole. W hat these individuals fail to realize is th at, rath er th an bein g an attack on religious practices,it is a step forw ard in recogn izin g an in d ivid u al’s righ t to h is ow n bod y. A ban recognizes that a m ale should be entitled to protection from harm ful religious acts and unnecessary m edical practices he cannot consent to.It recogn izes th at just because a practice is trad ition al, it is n ot n ecessarily right. In the last hundred years,m ale circu m cision in th e U n ited States h as becom e th e n orm . It is seen as a harm less, routine procedure as w ell as an affirm ation of m an h ood . In tru th , it is a m in d -bogglin g d ou ble stan d ard . T h e rem oval of sen sitive tissue in fem ales is regarded as atrocious, w hile the rem oval of the sim ilar tissu e in m ales is view ed as custom ary.T his ban is not the result of overbearing governm ent attem pting to w easel its w ay into the private lives of in d ivid u als, bu t rath er on e w h ich ackn ow led ges th at n o on e should be subjected to harm ful and u n n ecessary m ed ical p roced u res w ith out th eir con sen t, regardless of tradition.


the plant I think the plant theform plant the does plant the thai plant the plant plant the plant the plant plant I have aI’m problem. more ofI dont a vanilla like fan... my page LOL MARICAR. without some of nudity how express YOU MUST READ THE HOGWARTS ARTICLE. getthe so hot? thanks for the the headline skillz IT IS THE BEST THING IVE EVER WRITTEN EVER Oliver! the plant happy birthday Brian! the plant

the no touchie master4:the master 11-09-09 10:53 am Page 7

7 VOL. 40 ISSUE 1 - Thursday, September 8, 2011

EDITOR: Nathalie Laflamme CONTACT:

Nanny neglect New Demiberal Party tyler rUSS-HOgg STAFF WRITER

aBigail De BUrgH galWey STAFF WRITER Sh w eyga M u llah , n an n y for th e G ad h afi fam ily, w as fin ally sen t to th e h ospital w ith serious burn s last T uesd ay, six m on th s after th ey h ad originally been inflicted,because she cou ld n ot keep H an n ibal G ad h afi’s daughter quiet. M u llah w as fou n d w h en C N N visited th e form er h om e of H an n ibal G ad h afi, th e Libyan d ictator’s son . T he m ansion had been ransacked by anti-G adhafirebels.A m em ber of the staff told C N N about M ullah and said th at A lin e G ad h afi, M u am m ar G ad h afi’s d au gh ter in law , h ad bu rn ed her. “She took m e to the bathroom . She tied m y hands behind m y back, and tied m y feet,” M ullah told C N N . “Sh e tap ed m y m ou th , an d started p ou rin g th e boilin g w ater on m y head… ” T h e bu rn s w ere in flicted six m on th s ago th en ren ew ed th ree m on th s later. T h e G ad h afi h ou sehold refused to let her receive treatm en t or h elp. “T h ere w ere m aggots com ing out of m y head because she had hidden m e and no one had seen m e,” M ullah said to C N N . M u llah w as d ep rived of food an d sleep for th ree d ays. G ad h afi’s daughter-in-law even threatened the staff.“If anyone gives her food,I’lldo the sam e to you,” M rs. G adhafi said, M ullah said to C N N . W h en sh e w as fin ally brou gh t to the hospital, the hospital’s staff w as

bu llied by G ad h afi’s em p loyees to stop treatm en ts. “A fter th ree d ays th ey cam e an d th reaten ed m e h ere an d said you h ave to d isch arge th e case or oth erw ise you h ave a lot of p roblem s,” th e h osp ital’s D irector R id a Fran ka told C N N . M u llah w as taken back to th e h ou seh old , bu t bodyguards sm uggled her back into th e h osp ital. T h is tim e d octors d id not let her go despite the continuing threats, according to C N N . A s rebels gain ed con trol of th e Libyan cap ital, T rip oli, th e G ad h afi fam ily fled to A lgiers on “hum anitarian grounds,” M ourad Benm ehidi,A lgerian A m bassad or of th e U n ited N ations (U N ) told BBC , deserting the house w ith M ullah in it. T his scandal did not help w in popularity votes for the G adhafi fam ily, especially since the anti- governm ent protests that began in T ripolion Feb. 15. T h e p op u lation w as u n h ap p y w ith G adhafi’s regim e that,according to C N N , “cru sh ed an d con trolled Libya for 42 years.” T h e p rotests w ere p eacefu l u n til G adhafi’s speech on Feb.21.G adhafi spoke for 20 seconds before security forces opened fire on protesters, reported BBC . T his caused upheaval in n eigh borin g coun tries an d in spired protesters all around the w orld. “T h e Libya th at seem ed forever frozen by C olonel G adhafi's violence an d fear h as n ow ch an ged , an d w h eth er h e falls today or som etim e soon , th e M id d le East an d N orth A frica w on't be the sam e,” A braham s reported.

Renew ed talks of a m erger betw een C an ad a’s N ew D em ocratic Party (N D P) and LiberalParty occurred follow in g N D P lead er Jack Layton ’s d eath on A u g. 22, bu t on ly D en is C od erre, a veteran Liberal M P, an d N D P M P Pat M artin are su p p ortin g the idea. A m erger betw een these tw o parties w ould un ite th e cen ter-left political p arties of C an ad a an d give th em a better chance of w inning the election in 2015.Such an event w ould be akin to th e m erger of th e C an ad ian A lliance and the Progressive C onservative Party of C anada in 2003,joining to form T h e C on servative Party of C an ad a, w h ich h as been in p ow er since 2006. “I believe [that] if w e w ant a country w ith a progressive future, it w ill be a valid discussion,” C oderre told th e T oron to Su n . H e believes talks sh ou ld be on th e table, d esp ite In terim Liberalleader Bob Rae denying that anything of the sort is even rem otely possible. “It’s fiction ,” R ae told T h e G lobe and M ail.“Is it a debate about som e-

thing real? M y answ er is no.” “T he conversation alone is striking fear in the hearts of [N eo-C onservatives],and it should,” M artin told the N ation al Post. “If w e can bu ry th e h atch et th e jig is u p for th eir ou td ated id eology. It m ay n ot be th e rap tu re th ey w ere w aitin g for, bu t th e n et effect w ou ld be th e sam e. T hey’d be toast.” N D P President Brian T opp also den ied an y p ossibility of a m erger in th e n ear fu tu re. “T h e Liberals h ave been very clear th at [th e]'m erger' isn't on their agenda. A nd it isn't on ours," T opp told C BC . T h e N D P an d th e Liberals h ave som e policy in com m on,but the fact rem ains that both parties w ould have to m ake con cession s. N eith er Party has show n any sign that they are prepared to m ake com prom ises on policy or anything else. "O ur w illingness to w ork w ith others to get things done in Parliam ent w as a key part of our success in M ay. W e sh ou ld n 't d rop th at, an d w e shouldn't adopt the Liberal'w e w on't w ork w ith anyone – you have to vote for us'approach that served them so poorly," T opp said. D espite staunch opposition by both p arties on th e su bject of a m erger, m any big nam es have supported the idea,including form er N D P leader Ed

Broad ben t, form er Prim e M in ister Jean C hretien,and H ead of C anadian A utow orkers U nion K en Lew enza. "It's sim p le n u m bers. It's sim p le fact. T his is not rhetoric. A t the end of th e d ay, if you can com bin e th e left-of-centre votes into one political p arty, you h ave an op p ortu n ity to govern" Lew enza told C BC . T he Liberal Party had talked about m erging w ith the C o-operative C om m on w ealth Fed eration (C C F), th e predecessors to the N D P,in 1956,according to C BC . "If they had done it... a lot of people think,and I think too,they w ould h ave been th e govern m en t tod ay," Jean C h rétien , ex-Prim e M in ister of C anada, told C BC . "I think w e dem onstrated that it is the N D P that is the true alternative,” Jack Layton told the G lobe and M ail in M ay. Layton led th e p arty from 2003 to 2011,and did not support a m erger w ith th e liberal p arty. H is tragic d eath in A u gu st h as left th e N D P w ith ou t th e m an th at w on th e party the m ost seats since it’s founding in 1962. Layton died of cancer at his hom e in Toronto on A ug.22 follow ing a political career of 30 years.



Once Ju go...Juice BarBara maDimenOS STAFF WRITER In th e n ext few w eeks, th e A n derson-M cQ ueen funeralhom e,in St.Petersburg, Florida, w ill begin usin g a new m achine that can liquify corpses by heating them in alkaline w ater. Resom ation Ltd engineered this device,w hich uses a process called “A lkaline H ydrolysis.” It w as created due

to th e h igh d em an d for an ecofriendly alternative to crem ation,but h as raised m an y eth ical con cern s. T h e m ach in e h as yet to be fully accep ted in th e U n ited K in gd om an d U nited States of A m erica. T h is u n it d issolves th e bod ies by h eatin g th em in 300 d egree C elsius cylin d ers th at ap p ly 60 p ou n d s of p ressu re p er squ are in ch on th e corpse. T he body is im m erged in alkaline w ater for an average of tw o to

three hours, the sam e length as crem ation w ou ld take. T h e bod y is transform ed into a brow n syrup contain in g bon e ash . T h e liqu id , con tain in g th e bod y tissu e, is p ou red d ow n a m u n icip al d rain , an d th e bones are put into a crem ulator that cru sh es th em in to d u st. A n y oth er parts such as artificial join ts or im plan ts are safely kept, accord in g to BBC . “T h e en ergy n eed ed for th e reso-

m ation process in th e form of electricity an d gas is less th an on e-seven th of th e en ergy requ ired for a crem ation,” Resom ation Ltd’s w ebsite stated. It also states th at th e reduction in greenhouse gases w ould low er con sid erably, as air-born m ercu ry w ould not be processed. T h is n ew crem ation p rocess m ay cau se eth ical con cern s. Both p sych op ath s an d d ictators h ave u sed acid or lye to torture or destroy evi-

den ce of th eir victim s, accordin g to U SA today . Sullivan is urging it to becom e an alternative to crem ation, not only in the U K , but in the U SA as w ell. “O n ce th e [U S] see th e u n it ru n ning, see the process and how dignified,respectful,quiet and quick it is, th ey w ill h elp to p u sh th rou gh legislative ch an ge in th e U K ,” San d y Sulivan,founder of Resonm ation Ltd, told BBC .

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the plant

AVPM/AVPS references

the no touchie master4:the master 11-09-09 10:53 am Page 8


VOL. 40 ISSUE 1 - Thursday, September 8, 2011 PUBliC tranSit

STM leaves Montrealers yelling “FML!” StePHanie Ullman STAFF WRITER O n an average w eekday,250,000 M on trealers rely on th e Société d e T ran sp ort d e M on tréal (ST M ) an d their fleet of buses alone to get them w here they need to be.M any of these people find them selves in situations sim ilar to the one above. T he ST M is a vital agen t in th e lifeblood th at pulses through the veins of M ontreal. If it does not function like clockw ork, the city and its inhabitants are negatively affected.O ne late bus can yield unfavourable results for its potential passengers. A sid e from th e occasion al in terruption caused by exceptional situation s, ou r m etro system h as n early p erfected its p u n ctu ality, u n in flu en ced by th e p ossible d isru p tion s th at above-grou n d tran sp ortation s often face; for exam ple, snow storm s an d con stru ction . Becau se of th ese in evitable d isru p tion s, bu ses often fail to sh ow u p at th eir d esign ated tim es. C om m uters w ho take the bus are often left in the dark concerning these disruptions, w hile the m etro is able to clearly indicate delays to its

riders on screens and speakers.

It’s alm ost suppertim e on a frigid, 20-below -zero, evening and you decide to finally m uster up the courage to leave you r office bu ild in g, an d head to your car.You brave the subzero w inds for tw o seem ingly neverending blocks until the car is finally w ithin view ;your heated oasis am idst th e sn ow y d esert. Sh u ttin g ou t th e cold w ith a slam of the car door and a blast of w arm th from the vents,you begin you r lu xu riou s rid e h om e, blazing past the bus stop on the next corner. I w atch you fade aw ay over the horizon ; th e sm oky rem ain s of your exhaust pipe suspended in the air,as if frozen th ere, just like m e. I’ve been slow ly inching m y w ay closer to the other com m uters at the stop for the past 30 m inutes, attem pting to conserve body heat as I w ait for m y bus th at n ever sh ow ed u p . I sh iver an d direct m y gaze up the street for the hundreth tim e,hoping to catch som e glim pse of a bus w ithin the cloak of darkness that is 7 p.m .at this tim e of year. I see nothing. I keep w aiting.

“I w as on m y w ay to a friend’s house last w eek because she cooked dinner for a few of our friends,” recounted D ena A bedi, a student at V anier C ollege. “A ll I n eed ed w as a sh ort rid e on the 51 from Snow don m etro, but the bus never show ed.A fter ten m inutes,I decided to w alk,because I w as running late. A bout halfw ay there, a bus drove right past m e! I w as frustrated by that slap in the face and I felt guilty for keeping m y friend w aiting.”

“All I needed was a short ride on the 51 from Snowdon metro, but the bus never showed.” Dena Abidi, Vanier College Student Enter M arianne Rouette,spokesperson for the ST M w ho I sought out to shed light on the situation. T he petite, m iddle-aged blonde w om an not only grants interview s,but organizes “m o re-th an -a-p ress-co n feren ce” even ts to sh ow case n ew d evelop m ents in the system as w ell, such as th e “Réseau 10 M in utes M ax” even t last sum m er.

A ccord in g to R ouette, th ere are m an y, varyin g reason s w h y a bu s m igh t n ot sh ow up at its sch ed uled tim e. “T here could be a snow storm , an d th e d ays follow in g th e sn ow storm are slow as w ell due to heavy traffic,” sh e exp lain ed , in terlockin g her sm all hands on her desk. “T here is the possibility of a bus getting into an accident,or a m echanicalproblem could cause it to break dow n.In that case, w e h ave to call for backu p , m eaning a replacem ent bus. If there is an accident,the police and another bus w ill com e, and that causes a big delay,” she continued. “T here m ight also be som eone sick on-board,so in that case they have to call the em ergency services and w ait.Evidently,it isn’t alw ays the bus’s fault – if som ebod y on th e bu s is h avin g trou ble, the bus is stuck.” T h ese scen arios p lay ou t often enough that people everyw here have a com p lain t to file abou t th eir bu s causing them grief.The H orror of the 105 , a p iece p u blish ed in th e M on treal M irror, told of the trouble, and in efficien cy th at riders of th e 105 are forced to live w ith.

"Customers can subscribe [to certain bus routes] and we will send them information about changes or service issues." Pierre Dauphinais, executive director of major projects for the STM

Esp ecially d u rin g p eak h ou rs, N D G ’s buses chug along their short, yet im portant route at a snail’s pace at th e h an d s of h eavy traffic alon g Sherbrooke. Rhea N elken, a C oncord ia stud en t in terview ed in th e article, stated th at sh e often op ts for w alkin g to w ork an d sch ool as op p osed to takin g th e bu s, u ltim ately beating it to her destination.K athryn A yres, a teach er at C on cord ia U n iversity’s Loyola cam pus, prepared a petition “deploring the sorry state of service on the 105 route ... [the onlin e version ’s] com m en ts call 105 service ‘aw ful,’‘dism al’and ‘hellish.’” Presen tly, n o action h as been taken to regulate this abysm al service; regard less of th e p etition . Sn ow d on cou n cillor an d ST M vice-ch air p erson,M arvin Rotrand did not rule out the possibility of having articulated bu ses, better kn ow n as ‘accord ion ’ bu ses, p u t on th e 105 rou te, bu t deem ed such plans as “prem ature.”

the plant I got into an argument the plant the guy at the Canadia Tire store. He When argument-kicked my He so plant brutal Don’t ever getpushes into fights with ugly people. They have nothing to lose the plant thewith plant the plant the plant theass. plant thewas plant the he plant the plant Fuckin’ Chuck Norris he does push-ups... He doesn’t push himself up, he the world down

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DiD yOU knOW tHat:  -the first form of public transit in montreal was called the City Passenger railway Company, and was established in 1861.

-two buses began providing regular service on Bridge Street on november 18, 1919. these vehicles were trucks that had been transformed into buses at the tramway company’s workshop. the bus was truly a fixture in montréal as of 1925. - On march 29, 1937, British-made trolley buses were running in montréal, a Canadian first. later, another model of trolley bus, the Brill, assembled by Canadian Car in lachine, was in use until the final withdrawal of this type of vehicle on June 28, 1966, a few months prior to the opening of the métro.

the plant I’ve been called the Songbird of my generation the plant They say that I sound like a cross betweenthe plant Jesus and Fergythe plant the plant text text text text. the plant text text text text. the plant text text text text. the plant

- in 1950, the City of montréal created the Commission de transport de montréal (montréal transit Commission) in accordance with a law adopted by the legislative assembly of the province of quebec. the Ctm officially commenced its activities on June 16, 1951, the day it took possession of the assets of the montreal tramways Co.


A lthough the line is due for a “m ajor service boost” in Septem ber,accordin g to R otran d , th e 105-ers are doom ed to be burdened by the sporad ic ten d en cies of th eir bu s u n til th en . T h an kfu lly, th ere is th e fain t glow of a long-aw aited sunrise on the horizon. It w on’t adjust the issue of buses show ing up late, or not show in g u p at all, bu t it ah ou ld at least allow com m uters to get a good idea of w h at’s in store for th em w h ile w aitin g at th e bu s stop . A n article published in La Presse in Septem ber 2010 explained the idea of a new G PS system th at w ou ld be in stalled in every bus betw een 2013 and 2015.It w ill p erm it th e ST M to kn ow th e exact location of each bu s at all tim es,allow ing them to adjust service and avoid delays. T h an ks to th e u p com in g G PS system s,com m uters w illalso gain access to inform ation,as w ell as updates on th eir sm artp h on es, in d icatin g w hether or not their bus is on tim e. T he sam e system is already in place for th e m etro. "C u stom ers can su bscribe [to certain bus routes] and w e w ill sen d th em in form ation abou t changes or service issues," said Pierre D au p h in ais, execu tive d irector of m ajor projects for the ST M . A side from slow ly introducing a G PS system that w ill surely alter the bus system for th e better, th e ST M is ready to take w hatever steps possible to regulate th e problem of late an d un reliable bus service.W e call th em ‘road reinforcem ent.’ ”

“If w e m iss a bu s becau se a d river calls in sick in the m orning, w e have a list of reserves that w e can call to see if they can com e and replace that d river,” R ou ette exp lain ed . “T h at m ean s th at th e bu s w ill leave later, but at least it w ill be on the road. A s I also said before, if som ething happens to a vehicle such as an accident or a m echanicalproblem ,w e do have replacem ent vehicles. M an y of th e cau ses associated w ith late bu ses are attribu ted to th e sn ow y blan ket w h ich covers M on treal for alm ost half the year, a phenom enon that has proved nature to be m ore p ow erfu l th an m an , tim e and tim e again. A s a last resort, if a bu s is so d elayed th at a su p ervisor has deem ed it im possible for the bus to com plete its route, the driver w ill be d irected to a d ifferen t rou te to p ick u p its slack. T h is exp lain s th e “disappearing bus” phenom enon, in w h ich case th ere is a can celled arrival,and the next bus that show s up is th e on e sch ed u led for th e n ext tim e slot. “O f course, there are people on the bus.W e take them into accou n t, w e w on ’t let th em stan d there,” Rouette chuckled,sensing m y disbelief. “T hey w ill sw itch over at a m etro station because m an y people usually get out there, or there m ight be tw o bu ses lin ed u p so th at th ey can ask th ose w h o d on ’t n eed th e m etro to get on the next one.”

Rouette w as even gracious enough to provide a copy of the ST M ’s “Plan stratégique 2020,” a docum ent contain in g th e com p an y’s goals to be ach ieved by – you gu essed it – th e year 2020. T h e text, a su rp risin gly colourful an d design -savvy piece of w ork, talks of extending the orange, blue, and yellow m etro lines, reducing the buses’ carbon footprint, and in trod u cin g m ore flexible fare op tion s, ben efittin g com m u n ities an d com m uters of all kin d s.For bus-rid ers in-particular,there is good new s. Sh ou ld th e “Plan tratégiqu e” stay true to its w ord,the bus count is due to ju m p from 1,680 to a fleet of 2,114 vehicles,including 400 articulated bu ses. T h is w ill corresp on d w ith a 32% hike in service from 2010 to 2020 A n ew n etw ork of reserved lanes and traffic lights indicating priority for buses are due to be set up as w ell, revolution izin g our curren t system ,and finally giving buses a fair shot at com pleting their routes w ith punctuality. For now ,M ontrealers w ill continue to p lay th e w aitin g gam e. Sn ow storm s w illcontinue to bring parts of the city to a halt;com m uters w illstill be in the dark, crossing their fingers about the status of their bus;the 105 w ill rem ain a n u isan ce to its loyal cu stom ers. G PS, sm art-p h on e u p d ates, an d reserved lan es all seem like h azy ideals th at just out of our reach for the tim e being.Sim ply put, 2020 cannot com e quickly enough.

VOL. 40 ISSUE 1 - Thursday, September 8, 2011

-Since may 4, 1905, the date on which montréal became the first city in the world to implement a tramway service on which the passenger paid upon entering. Prior to that time, each tramway had two employees - a motorman to drive the tramway and a conductor to collect the fares.


- it was on Sept. 21, 1892, that montrealers first saw the rocket, a tramway running on electricity, travelling on the streets of their city.


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10 VOL. 40 ISSUE 1 - Thursday, September 8, 2011


Jersey, not sure Jersey Shore is back for some more shock and whore

rOBin Della COrte STAFF WRITER Jersey Sh ore is back, so w h o’s ready to let the gam es begin? I’m not. You’d th in k th ree season s of Jersey Shore w ould suffice but no,of course th ese “Italian s” are back. O n ly n ow th ey’re in Italy. N ot on ly h ave th ey publicised their fake tans and tits in Jersey and M iam i,but now they w ant to p u blicise it in Floren ce, so th at even the real Italians can hate them too. W e’ve only been graced w ith six episodes from season four and I’m already annoyed. First off, d esp ite Jw ow w ’s p lastic surgery denial, I still believe the rum ours.She looks a lot different.N ow , h er w h ole boobs situ ation looks rath er rid icu lou s. H er boobs are at h er n eck lin e an d look as if th ey’re going to pop any m inute. T his girl is truly ridiculous because she still believes she looks good. In reality she looks like a 42-year-old atten tion w hore w ith a fake tan, fake face and fake tits. N ext,I’d like to point out the w hole “tw in business.” N ow this stupid tw in w as a “virgin ” w h o M ike brou gh t back to th eir h ou se in Italy after clu bbin g, bu t sh e in stead tried to hook up w ith V inny and then ended u p h ookin g u p w ith D een a. 'N u ff said. T h en th ere's th e p erfect cou p le, Ronnie and Sam m i. So they start off ign orin g each oth er an d th en of course “trying to w ork it out” (for the m illion th tim e.) T h in gs seem to be goin g good for th e first 24 h ou rs, until of course a fight breaks out betw een M ike and Ronnie w hich Sam m i is in the m iddle of. So obviously all

h ell breaks loose an d you h ear Sam m i’s m ost fam ou s sp eech “ST T A A A P IT R O N N IE ST A A A A P” as she tries to pull him off of M ike. So they break up (again) w ith the w hole over d ram atic scen e an d R on n ie being stupid later buys Sam m i flow ers to say “I’m n ot th e assh ole, you are.” Yeah,m akes no sense but guess w hat,neither does their relationship. M ike en d s u p in th e h osp ital n ot because of R on n ie’s “pun ch es,” but because he bashed his ow n head into the fucking w all. T hen he returns to the house w ith a neck brace that he obviously didn’t need. T o top things off, this loser thinks he’s so cool because he's w earing red shades w hile w earing his neck brace. T his guy seriously needs to get over him self. A dditionally,the clothing com pany

A bercrom bie and Fitch are w illing to pay M ike, Pauly D , V inny and som e of the other Jersey Shore cast m em bers to stop w earin g th eir cloth es an ym ore becau se th ey are em barrassed to be con n ected to th e sh ow in any w ay. Yes, I’m serious. A clothin g store d oesn 't w an t Jersey Sh ore cast m em bers to p rom ote th eir cloth es. You kn ow you su ck w h en even a cloth in g store d oesn ’t w an t you to w ear their clothes. A t this point you’re probably w ondering w hy I even w atch this show if I hate it so m uch.It's because M T V is brain w ash in gly ad d ictive. I really don’t w ant to w atch another episode, I really d on ’t. A n d to th in k Jersey Shore is com ing back for season five. G reat.

Please, oh, please be nice to animals!

gina tSOtaS STAFF WRITER T h e first qu estion I ask p eop le w hen I m eet them is:“D o you like anim als?” A fter listening to the answ er to the question,I autom atically know if I’ll like this person or not. I kn ow you ’re p robably all th in king: “Is this girl crazy?” But this theory is actu ally p roven to be a very reliable w ay of ju d gin g p eop le – at least for m e, it is. Peop le th at love and respect anim als tend to be nice, con sid erate p eop le. O n th e oth er hand, people that don’t respect anim als are just m ean and heartless.It’s true. Even G an d h i said : “T h e greatn ess of a n ation an d its m oral progress can be judged by the w ay its anim als are treated.” Look at M ichael V ick for exam ple, the ex-football star for the Philadelphia Eagles. W hen I hear his nam e, I cringe. It’s not just m e, I’m sure m illions of other people do too. I’d feel disgusted to even be associated w ith h im . I’m sorry to all you football fans,but he gives his football team a bad nam e.H is dog-fighting farm w as not only disgusting, but it w as truly heartless. If I knew him , I w ould definitely punch him in the face really hard for w hat he did.T hat’s the least I’d do. Peop le sh ou ld d efin itely boycott h is football team becau se of th at. T h at w ay, m aybe I’d get to sp en d som e m ore tim e w ith m y broth er, since he’s alw ays w atching football. N o,actually,instead,people should

the the plant plant the text. plant the*clap* plant the the plant plant cool text cool text cool text dreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeams text text text text. the plantthe textplant text text Gabe text. Bondoc

just be m ore like m e.Live in a house w ith seven pets, (four dogs, tw o cats and a rabbit) dedicate your life to the e-shelter SPC A , and fight for anim al righ ts. A lso don ’t forget to go vegetarian! I’m a person that doesn’t need fur coats, m akeu p th at’s tested on an im als, th at d oesn ’t n eed to eat m eat every five seconds and w ould never adopt from pet stores. I fin d replacem en ts an d trust m e, it’s possible. So, you’d probably see m e at M A C or at Le Bod y Sh op ; both of th ese p laces avoid an im al testin g. A lso, n ow th at I m en tion ed th at, if an ybod y w an ts to get m e an y beau ty products,you now know w here to go. M y favorite type of scent for a beauty product is jasm ine. N ow , you can go look. People have a hard tim e looking for anim alfriendly products or clothing. I w as talking to m y friend the other d ay, an d sh e d esp erately w an ted leath er p an ts. I d on ’t u n d erstan d w hy she w ouldn’t listen to m e and go buy faux leather.Instead she w as insistin g th at th e real leath er p an ts w ere som ehow ,“better.” Faux or real, they look the exact sam e,so w hy not do the w orld a favor and get the faux. I’m n ot tryin g to p reach you all into converting and becom ing anim al lovers. W ell, in a w ay, I am an d I hope it sort of w orked. But I’m sure that a lot of people feel this w ay and if not,I’ll find the little bit of the anim allover in you,and I’llbring it out som ehow , som ew ay.

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with editor responses

What should Jay-oncé call their child? “Christine Derion Angel Knowles-Carter”

Jake Lafleur Social Science

Jason Desrouleaux Interior Design

People w ill understand it w hen they call their second child Pepa.

Firstly, you’ve obviously thought about this before and secondly, I really like your song “In M y H ead.”


“Taylor Swift”

Erin Goral

Laura Marchand Cin/Vid/Com

Social Science You spelt “It’s K anyes” w rong.

M ore proof that it’s K anyes.



“Girl, Shontelle Boy, Evanson”

CJ Dupras Literature

Jancie Creaney Cin/Vid/Com

Sarita Kaplan Psychology

Charley Queraud C.A.L.L.

If I applied this rule to m yself m y nam e w ould be “N ot w ealthy, not poor.”

Sounds like som eone w ishes they w ere raised by a gazillionaire Rap m ogul and Pop diva couple. T hat’s so w eird.

Black nam es are easy. Just throw random syllables together.

I get it! It’s the B from Beyonce and the J from Jay-Z! I could have been called BJ, I guess. M y M um ’s nam e is Blow and m y D ad’s nam e is Job.

Skanks D ear Skanks, I recen tly started h ookin g u p w ith som eone because w e both just w an t sex, w h at can I d o to m ake sure she doesn’t get attached?


W elcom e back D aw sonites,are you read y for an oth er sem ester filled w ith d ysfu n ction al celebrities an d th eir question able action s? I am , so let’s get stared. T he G lee actors have been busy at w ork allsum m er.Staying in the public eye during the off-season can be hard, but I think they have the right idea. O r not. H eather M orris,w ho plays Brittany, has been keeping busy.You probably saw her prancing around in a Bureau en G ros com m erciallast m onth.H ow ever, sh e also took p art in a T yler Shields photo shoot that has a lot of people talkin g. Let m e describe th is to you.She’s dressed in a very sixties housew ife inspired dress,lying dow n on an iron in g board , iron in h an d , w ith a black eye.So since w e allknow that dom estic violence is sexy,M orris is photographed licking an iron,and ironing a guy’s crotch. So artsy. T h e p h otograp h er w as h on estly ju st askin g for com p lain ts an d boy did he get them . Several m edia sites posted the pictures and critics found the photos upsetting as they believed th ey w ere “glam orizin g violen ce against w om en.” Sh ield s said h e w as “sorry” an d that this w as not the intended m essage.So now this oh-so edgy photograp h er is backp ed alin g w ith all h is m igh t. H e d eclared th at h e w ou ld au ction off an im age for 100k an d d on ate every cen t to a top ch arity that w orks against dom estic violence or supports victim s of it.

First off, h ow cou ld you take p ictures like this w ithout the thought of d om estic violen ce com in g to m in d ? H e said he w as going for the “bruised Barbie look.” W h at? T h at d oesn ’t m ake any sense.If Barbie has a black eye then w ho gave it to her? I highly d ou bt it w as h er gold en d ood le. It cou ld h ave p robably been h er jealou s ch u bby frien d , bu t I h ear K en has som e serious insecurities w hen it com es to her and other m en! A ll jokin g asid e, I th in k it w as really bad judgm ent on the part of the photographer and M orris to actually take part in this shoot. I am not saying that I think they support dom estic violen ce, bu t th ese p ictu res blatantly display it in an inappropriate m atter, an d th ere is n oth in g funny about it. I am also ap p alled by th e ch eap ness of the pictures.They aren’t even aesth etically pleasin g, so h e can n ot even p ass it off as art. T h ey are ch eap , tacky, an d offen sive. If an yone actually bids 100k or higher on these I say they are just as stupid as th e p eop le w h o cam e u p w ith th e id ea. If you h ave th e m on ey to d on ate ju st d on ate it d irectly to th e charity.D on’t w aste it on som e photo on one of Beyoncé’s form er back-up d an cers sp ortin g a black eye. Seriously, people, just because you have an expensive cam era and Photoshop , it doesn’t m ake you a brilliant artist! I’m n ot ru d e; th e tru th is, th ou gh . T ake it up w ith him .

thebeplant plant the brill. plant thetext plant plant I think Jay-onces baby should called text Grammy text the text plant text. the Chicken Teriyaki text text at the textcaf text. is mad textRavens text text. will the thrash the Steelers on Sunday. Book it.


1. N ever ‘plan ’ sexual en coun ters. It becom es rou tin e an d th e sex ends up not being w orth your tim e. N othing is better than being spontaneously ravaged. 2. D on ’t stay for breakfast. You r best bet is to leave sh ortly after fucking.But if you m ust sleepover, please, leave before the toast is in th e toaster. O th erw ise it ju st gets aw kw ard. 3. D on’t ever get together and not have sex. U nless you’re hoping for a relationship, there should be no reason for you to enjoy their actual com p an y; th eir m oan s an d looks are p robably th e on ly th in g you should like about them . 4. M ost im p ortan tly, be selfish . You ’re d oin g th is for you rself! If you really don’t w ant to do it, it’s not your responsibility to suck off his boner.

Shizz in the Bizz


W e’ve all been single. A nd w e all know how hard it can be to fulfill th ose urges th at n ature h as given us.A nd m ost difficult of all is w hat the responsible w ay of dealing w ith those urges w ould be. W e can’t all go out to clubs and pry on helpless in secu re p lastered fem ales w h en ever the itch arises. T hat is w rong. T his is w hy w e have created fuck friends. You can have one,or m ultiples of them . You don’t have to take them out on expensive dates or even entertain th em w ith lon g con versation s abou t you r d eep em otion s. You can get together,sm oke a doobie,have som e fun ,and before you know it your back in your life w ithout any em otional scarring.U nfortu n ately th ere is an art beh in d m ain tain in g a good fu ck frien d , guidelines w hich w e m ust be very w ary of.


VOL. 40 ISSUE 1 - Thursday, September 8, 2011


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16 VOL. 40 ISSUE 1 - Thursday, September 8, 2011



Weekend Confirmed Montreal tourism for locals

Movies this weekend, Cinema Bank Scotia is giving you a chance to see the movie-buff classic on the big screen: Citizen Kane is playing in theatres. grab a bag of popcorn and hop into a seat as you either stare in wonder at this top rated film or snore, exhausted from feigning to understand the meaning behind the importance of the sled. it’s also playing at Dix30 and Colisee kirkland.

Restaurants as it is already starting to get chilli in the evenings, you may want to put a bit of money aside and run into the warmth of le Piton de la fournese, an ile de la reunion specialty restaurant that is a little paradise of summer. the food is specifically from one side of an island off the coast of madagascar. the sea-food riddled menu of this little bring-your-ownwine restaurant is scrumptious, leaving pleasant memories in your mouth. you can find it on Duluth Street.

H appy Birthday You Jay Jay Pistolet

Be m y A nim al The G ood N atured

The Com a Song D arw in D eez

N o, it’s not by any m easure a new song, nor is any of the songs in plant rotation this w eek but, you know ... lack of tim e and preperation. A ppart from lacking novelty of the british pop-folk scene, this track can boast being one of the m ost enthrallingly giddy love ballads of the decade. A definate D ow nload.

D espite being only as recent as the beginning of sum m er and sounding painfully electro-pop, this underground yet radio-friendly tube by Yeah Yeah Yeah look-alikes The G ood N atured are definitely a listen for people that are not too fond of the m ore indie m usic currently in circulation.

Put aw ay ‘‘Radar D etector’’ and ‘‘Bad D ay’’. D espite being good tubes, the lesser songs on D arw in D eez’s only album are non-the-less head bopping. D espite having a grim ropic, this B-side track has the catchy ring to it that is currently, albeit slow ly, escalating M r D eez to indie rock stardom . O nce m ore, this is not a new track, sadly.

Star-Struck Sexiest W om an A live R ih an n a, alread y rep u ted for h er looks, h as ju st been n am ed sexiest w om an alive by Esqu ire M agazin e. T h e starlet claim s th at th e p h oto shoot w as slightly intim idating in her m ind’s eye;the only preparation she had w as w axing and starving.

Bars most of you may know this trendy joint of town but it is important to start at the basics. Casa del Popolo (along with it’s sister venue Salla rossa) are a staple in montreal hipster culture and for good reasons. Half bar, half showroom, the small establishment boasts affordable drinks, great music and greater attendance. my favourite detail is the once-cigarettemachine turned into a vending machine for handmade toys and trinkets.

"I w ant to set the right exam ple and, at the sam e tim e, live m y life. I feel like pop stars can't be rock stars anym ore becau se th ey h ave to be role m odels," A ttem pting to preserve her role- m odel status, she said:

Breakin g and Entering and… Bathin g?

A ngelin a Jolie A s Jan e G ood all?

A m an w as recen tly ch arged for breaking into C eline D ion’s hom e on M on day Sept. 5 an d upon en terin g, h elped h im self to som e food in h er fridge and took a bath. H e allegedly snuck into the house by opening the garage door using the button to this effect in one of the cars stationed in th e fam ed cou p le’s d rivew ay. T h e veteran pop singer and her husband w ere off on a trip. T he 36-year-old suspect has been accused of breaking and entering,auto theft and property dam age. D an iel Bed ard , claim s to be a friend of the fam ily. H is cou rt debut w ill be N ovem ber 21.

T h e p rim atologist Jan e G ood all is having A ngelina Jolie play her role in the upcom ing feature film about her life. T h e 77-year-old told p eop le m agazine:‘‘I w as delighted w hen she told m e she w ould be excited to be a part of th e film . Som etim es, caugh t up in the m om ent,people prom ise to give their support but don't,or can't com e th rou gh . T h at w as n ot tru e w ith A ngelina." A lso featu rin g D ave M atth ew s an d Pierce Brosnan,the film is set to prem iere in select th eaters on Septem ber 27.

UPCOMING IN AUTUM TRENDS This fall, leave your pastels behind and enter dark warm autumn colors.

Events as it is every early September in this city, montrealers are trending up and hitting the downtown area for this edition of montreal fashion Week. there are many stores throwing special parallel events in the joyous occasion and various cocktail lounges pairing up with the festival. keep an eye out for art galleries on-site for the occasion and try to attend a live fashion show or two if your wallet permits. We will have a vast coverage of the unfurling event in next week’s arts and culture section of The Plant. If you end up going to one of these places, take a picture and send it our way. We WILL feature it in next week’s column. Also, pass all comments and suggestions and criticism on the arts section to I’m happy to hear what you have to say. Now go along and read the rest of the section and, if you feel couragous, the sports pages.

A erie- Light as air sw eaterknits w ill keep you w arm w hile keeping you looking sexy w hen paired w ith a sim ple dark dress

C ath K idston- T his PV C cotton coated bag is perfect for back to school and the autum n rain, it’s stylish and w ill keep your books and laptop dry

29.99$ U RBA N O U T FIT T ERS- Retro looking T riangle necklace

Mixing and matching eras leave for an interesting look.


46$ 526$

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the no touchie master4:the master 11-09-09 10:54 am Page 17

COnCert reVieW: PlantS anD animalS free DSU SHOW CHELSEA  HARRISON Veteran Staff Writer

Missed the Show? The DSU hosts a similar free every year at welcome week! Save the date!

VOL. 40 ISSUE 1 - Thursday, September 8, 2011

tradition in the student m ovem ent. N ext u p w as T oron to’s ow n Basia Bu lat, w h o seem ed to cap tivate th e crow d w ith her m elodies,and her im pressive strum m ing of the autoharp. Bu lat w asn ’t afraid to in teract w ith the crow d, sharing stories about her childhood and giving us an in depth look at th e m ean in gs beh in d h er m usic. H er set w as so dyn am ic th at sh e broke a ch ord off h er gu itar, w hich w as lent to her by Plants and A nim als. It w as a very em otional 45 m in u tes w h ich left th e au d ien ce pleased and definitely m ore in touch w ith their feelings. It w as apparent that the crow d had grow n eager for Plants and A nim als becau se, w h en th ey got on stage, a w ave of spectators m ade their w ay to th e d an ce floor. Playin g m aterial from both Parc A venue w hich w as released in 2008, an d Lala Lan d , released in 2010.T he Band did exactly w hat they are notorious for:giving a fantastic live perform ance.W atching gu itarists/vocalists W arren Sp icer an d N ic Basqu e in teract seem ed alm ost too good to be true w ith their im p eccable sou n d an d set con sistency. T his very successful evening ended at arou n d 10:30 p .m . an d left th e sh ow goers n oth in g sh ort of d elighted.


A s the close off for the D aw son Student U nion’s (D SU ) 2011 orientation w eek,M ontreal’s ow n Plants and A nim als alon g w ith Basia Bu lat, an d T h ierry Bru yère p layed a free con cert last Friday night at La T ulipe. T h ough in ten d ed for D aw son students, w ord of m outh inevitably did w hat it does best,and students from oth er sch ools w ere in atten d an ce. T h is w as n ot a p roblem . “It’s an even in g for D aw son Stu d en ts, bu t also a com m u n ity gath erin g,” A u d rey D eveau lt, D SU C h airp erson said. T he D SU m anaged to put together an im p ressive lin eu p in clu d in g em ergin g an d already big n am es in the m usic industry. “D uring the sum m er w e m ade a list of C an ad ian artists an d con tacted their m anagers.W e then deliberated an d figu red ou t w h o w e cou ld afford” Len n y Leprin ce, D SU D irector of Extern al A ffairs said , “W e’re just trying to give free entertainm ent to get us to touch base w ith the m em bers of the D SU ” O pening the concert at 7 p.m . w as T h ierry Bru yere, a M on treal folkrock m usician w ho offered the audien ce a taste of h is n ew ly fou n d ed French pieces.Bruyere played an energetic set, gettin g th e aud ien ce on th eir feet, w h ile sp ortin g th e com m only seen “red square” the D SU offers en cou ragin g solid arity, a


The Arts Editor Says:

this week, a very wary Dawson Student Union (DSU) is opening up the club spaces to all students that walk these college halls after a very busy welcome week. there is a little for everyone out there and you should definitely drop by your union’s office to find out more. they are also hosting the first Dawson Dining event of the semester, whereas, from now on, every monday and Wednesday, free vegetarian lunches will be passed out by DSU staff. finally, flair is in the air as montreal fashion Week kicks off, look forward to a trendy edition of the arts section next week.


I’m W ith You is the Red H ot ChiliPeppers’tenth studio album ,and just another exam ple of the band’s ability to tu rn ou t classic m aterial tim e an d tim e again. O f cou rse, th ere is a gap in g h ole w ithout long-tim e guitarist John Frusciante that Josh K linghoffer cannot h op e to fill, bu t th e R H C P m ach in e h as becom e talen ted at rep lacin g ban d m em bers an d h as d efin itely fou n d a gu itarist th at on ce again points the band in new direction. K linghoffer can’t hope to be the com m an d in g p resen ce th at w e h ave to com e to recognize in Frusciante, but he adds his ow n flare in this album , layering guitar licks and adding little fills here and there. A nthony K iedis’ lyrics have only im p roved over tim e, as h as h is voice, becom in g m ellow er w ith each passin g albu m . W h ere on ce h e w ou ld have rapped w ithout pause throughout a w hole song, now he sings w ith confidence. K iedis seem s m ore com -

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Beirut’s n ew albu m , T h e R ip tid e, w as released on A u g. 2, n early a m onth ago. Zachary C ondon’s band cam e out w ith an album filled w ith the sam e elem ents that m ade G ulag O rkestar a success in 2006. T h e sim p le m elod ies an d sw irlin g h orn accom pan im en ts in son gs like ‘‘East H arlem ’’ brin g th e ban d back to sim p ler arran gem en ts th an w ere p resen ted in T h e Flyin g C lu b C u p . Parts of this album have brought m e back to the sounds that originally attracted m e to son gs like ‘‘Postcard s from Italy’’ and ‘‘M ount W roclai’’. T he sim plicity is key,and C ondon’s voice m ore th an m akes u p for th e lack of com plicated instrum ental accom panim ent. H is ballads bring forw ard em otion s th at are rarely seen anym ore in an Indie m usic industry th at h as tu rn ed in creasin gly in to electro-p op in th e p ast five years. C on d on ’s calm er, m ore con fid en t com posing is definitely enjoyable to listen to. T h e sim p licity of th e T h e Rip Tide is calm ing and easy to listen to. the plant text text text text. the


It is im possible to say that this is a happy album to listen to. T he tones are not dark persay,but m elancholic, w h ile th e m elod ies are su btle an d beautiful yet catchy enough to stick in your head. T he horns, piano and strin gs d efin itely m ake up th e bare bon es of th ese son gs an d keep th is sh ort albu m to th e absolu te basics. O n ly n in e son gs an d 33 m in u tes later,you m ay find yourself w anting m ore.The quality of the album ,how ever,clearly m akes up for the lack of quantity.

fortable th an ever in th is albu m , from rapping about life and death in ‘‘Bren d an ’s D eath Son g’’, to sin gin g about a girl in ‘‘Police Station’’. O f cou rse, Flea’s bass p layin g on ly gets better w ith tim e, an d C h ad Sm ith m an ages to fin d a great beat for every son g. N o su rp rises th ere, after all, th ey’ve delivered fan tastic m aterial tim e an d tim e again , an d th ere’s n o reason th ey sh ou ld n ’t keep on doing it. A n oth er w elcom e ad d ition to th is albu m is th e p ian o p arts p layed by G reg K u rstin , p layin g for th e first tim e w ith the C hili Peppers on songs like ‘‘Police Station ’’ an d ‘‘Even You Brutus?’’. It is true that this is a different side of th e R ed H ot C h ili Pep p ers th an w e have ever seen;calm er,m ore assured an d m ostly void of th e rock n ’ roll that Frusciante originally brought to the band. T his is not bad thing, and w e sh ou ld rem em ber, Joh n Fru sciante w as a replacem ent him self all th ose years ago, for H illel Slovak. T hose w ere big shoes to fillfor som ebod y so you n g an d in exp erien ced , but he m anaged to becom e acknow ledged as one of the great m usicians to com e out of that tim e. K linghoffer is definitely m ore m ature th an Fru scian te w as w h en h e first played on M oth er’s M ilk , an d h as a m uch m ore subtle style. H e h as th e skill to keep up w ith Flea and Sm ith on every leveland add som ething on top of it. I look forw ard to m ore of this new ChiliPeppers m aterialin the future.


the no touchie master4:the master 11-09-09 10:54 am Page 18


VOL. 40 ISSUE 1 - Thursday, September 8, 2011




Chris Pike, a veteran writer and two time sports editor of The Plant gives us a very colourful account of his three days at the Montreal Osheaga Music and Arts Festival. You w an n a kn ow w h at I d id th e w eekend of July 29? W ell,I’lltellyou. Iw ent to an incredible three day long party at Parc Jean D rapeau. A nd as I prom ised m y good friend, and your lovely A rts Ed itor, C arl Perks, I am now going to share m y fantastic experience w ith the rest of you.

Day 1: FRIDAY So anyone w ho hadn’t recently been lobotom ized show ed up to the shortest of the three days for one reason, and one reason only:Em inem .But I’ll get to the m ost fam ous w hite rapper (aside from V anilla Ice of course) in just a m om ent. C ontrary to popular belief there w ere m ore acts than just the angry D etroit native playing that d ay. A lth ou gh th e bu zz arou n d th e festival qu ickly becam e w h o w asn ’t p layin g. Yes lad ies an d gen tlem en , K id C u d i can celled h is sh ow . W h y, pray tell, w ould he do such a thing? It turned out that M r C udi had fallen illw ith w hat could only be described as the sniffles and as such w ould not be gracing us w ith his presence.T his isn ’t th e first tim e th is h ap p en s in our city: he also stepped off of Lady G aga’s M on ster’s Ball T ou r (w h ere on e of th e d ates w as righ t h ere in M ontréal) due to “prior acting com m itm ents’’. But I digress. A ll w as not lost after K id C u d i can celled , Bran V an 3000 w as m oved to his tim e slot and K id K oala took Bran V an 3000’s old tim e slot. Enough about the stupid dram a that happened,let’s get to the m usic shall w e? T o be h on est th ere w as very little reason to leave th e m ain stages on Frid ay. T h at is of cou rse u n less you’re still a prepubescen t girl an d w anted to hear Lights play.The K nux tru ly kicked off w h at w ou ld be a great year for h ip -h op fan s at O sh eaga. T h e d u o from N ew O rlean s w ere full of energy and as som eone w ho had never heard them before, I can tell you I w as m ore th an pleasan tly su rp rised . T h eir sou n d very m u ch rem in d ed m e of T h e R oots, w h o h ad ju st fin ish ed p layin g th e Jazz Festival.T hen cam e supergroup Broken Social Scene. A ll I can really say abou t th em is th at if you d on ’t like indie rock, just listen to Broken Social Scene. I can assure you you’ll feel differently afterw ard. A fter Broken Social Scen e fin ish ed th eir last son g, in cam e th e Q uébecois collective know n as Bran V an 3000.U nfortunately, their set w as m ediocre and w ith th e excep tion of “D rin kin ’ in LA ”,very few songs seem ed to entice people into the show .H ow ever Im ust com m end D J Jam es D i Salvio for still com ing out after having gotten into a rath er am biguous acciden t th at left him in the hospital the night before w ith a rather large black eye to show for it the next day. D o you hear that K id C udi? H e had to go to th e fu ckin g h osp ital. M aybe you could learn a few things from the Q uébecois. O nce the seem ingly infinite m em bers of Bran V an 3000 exited th e stage, Jan elle M on áe began h er set. M s. M onáe put on a great show ,w hich included her hit single “T ightrope” as w ellas a perform ance of “I W ant You Back” by T h e Jackson 5 th at w ou ld h ave m ad e M ich ael proud . H er guitarist w as also on h is gam e, sh red ding solo after solo. O h and the fact that he looked like A ndre 3000 w as pretty aw esom e too. O nce the sun set,the festivalbecam e a very d ifferen t place. T h e h ipsters had dispersed and w ere replaced by w h at cou ld on ly be d escribed as d ou ch ebags d ep rived of fash ion sen se. In cred ibly baggy p an ts an d shirts seven sizes too big becam e the n orm . Excessive am ou n ts of beer began to be spilled all over.A s m uch as I love Em inem , he m ust have the least classy fans in the entire w orld.

T he term W hite T rash does not even begin to describe these people.It w as as if every sin gle p erson w h o h ad ever been on Jerry Springer show ed u p to Parc Jean D rap eau at on ce. T hankfully though, at 9:25 P.M . (Yes Em in em w as 5 m in u tes late), th e lights of the Budw eiser stage flooded the area and M arshall Bruce M athers III m ade his w ay on stage. W e w ere all treated to an intro about Em in em ’s recen t stin t in reh ab an d how he w asn’t sure if he’d ever perform again , blah blah blah . It w as boring and the only reason I w asn’t even m ore im patient about him perform ing w as because I knew it w ould even tu ally h ap p en . “W on ’t Back D ow n ” w as th e first son g h e p erform ed an d , w ell, for lack of better w ords, sh it w en t fuckin g crazy. T h e crow d erupted w ith a jet engine level roar.The rest of the show w as m ostly just that.Em inem played m ost of the son gs from h is latest albu m R ecovery, w hich isn’t his best, but expecting him to play The M arshallM athers LP w ould be stupid. H e did go to his back-catalogue thankfully, featuring son gs like “K ill You ”, “Stan ” an d everyon e’s favorite “T h e R eal Slim Sh ad y”. T h e sh ow w asn ’t exactly perfect though, as songs like “Space Bou n d ” an d “Ligh ters” som eh ow crep ed th eir w ay on to th e set list. T h ey just didn ’t fit w ith th e overall atm osphere of the show and seem ed to take the crow d out of action for a good five or 10 m in u tes. T h e oth er dow nside to the show w as the rather cheesy looking im ages that w ere projected behind Em inem and his band th rou gh ou t th e h ou r an d a h alf. It m ade everything feel very 90s. T his kind of stuff is m ostly just nitpicking though as the tw o best parts of the show quickly m ade m e forget about the less entertaining bits.First w as the surprise appearance of Royce D a 5’9” perform in g “Fastlan e” w ith Em in em from th eir n ew albu m Bad M eets Evil. H ip-hop fans everyw here have been w aiting since 1999 to see these tw o M C s reunited and to experience it first hand w as unbelievable. A n d secon d w as th e en core. I could m ake a joke about how one of his album s is called Encore, but I’d rather n ot. A n yw ay, Em in em left th e stage about ten m inutes before he w as supp osed to. N ow everyon e w h o h ad never been to a concert before began to w alk im m ed iately tow ard th e m etro. T h e rest of u s an xiou sly w aited for w hat cam e next.A nd w hat cam e next w as the first few notes of the intro to “Lose Yourself”. W as it a little corn y to en d h is sh ow w ith a song that w on an O scar? Yes. Should he perhaps have m ade it a little less obvious that it w ould be “Lose Yourself”? Yes. W as it th e best p ossible en d to an earth sh atterin gly great show ? H ell. Yes. N ow I w on ’t bore you w ith th e extrem ely long and crow ded ride hom e on the m etro.Instead I’lljust skip directly to day tw o.

Day 2: SATURDAY Saturday w as the best day out of the three. Sam Roberts show ed up ten m inutes late, w hich w as bullshit considering h e’s a M on tréaler an d kn ow s h ow shitty the traffic getting to Parc Jean D rap eau d u rin g O sh eaga w eeken d w ould be.H e w as also w ithout his signature beard,w hich m ade him look a little stran ge to m e. Beard or n ot, Sam an d th e boys w ere d efin itely solid . A good m ix of old an d n ew m ade for a great start to the bigger nam es of the day. It w as at least an hour until anyone else good played.W ith the exception of Sia’s “Breathe M e” the rest of her set w as som ew h at forgettable. T h at w as disappointing given the quality of her voice.

The Arts Editor Says:

though this article is an opinion piece on one particular individual’s experience at Osheaga, the event has various activities to offer and includes something for all tastes. i hope this piece will make you feel like buying a ticket for next summer’s edition. next week, we will have a similar article on the Jazz festival. O n ce 6:30 P.M . rolled aroun d, Lupe Fiasco,the socially conscious Chicago rapper took to the Blackberry stage. A nyone w ho w as there can attest to th e m assive levels of en ergy exh ibited by Lu p e, h is ban d an d th e crow d . H is set in clu d ed a few n ew tracks like “T he Show G oes on” and “W ord s I N ever Said ” as w ell as a good m ix of old ies like “Su p erstar” an d “K ick, Pu sh ”. Lu p e Fiasco is kn ow n for h is p olitically ch arged lyrics and so it cam e as no surprise w hen halfw ay through his perform ance he took a few m inutes to rip the U nited States governm ent a new asshole.N eedless to say as Canadians w e enjoyed this thoroughly. It w as only after the show that I realized Stephen H arper is stillPrim e M inister… Icried a little. A fter Lupe Fiasco I attended Ratatat’s show at the G reen Stage. I w as quite tired after Lupe’s set so I en d ed up just relaxing by the bleachers w ith a beer and som e shish taouk.I can tell you th at beer, sh ish taou k an d th e am bient sound of Ratatat are an incred ible m ix an d som eth in g n early everyone w ill enjoy. W ait, so if I w ent to Ratatat im m ediately after Lupe Fiasco did that m ean I m issed the reunion of D eath From A bove 1979? N o. I w en t, bu t both Jesse F K eeler and Sebastian G rainger felt short of m y expectations. I don’t blam e them though, I’m pretty sure it had to do w ith w hoever set up their gear and the ridiculous heat coupled w ith m y h u n ger d id n ’t h elp th eir cau se. M aybe I m issed ou t, bu t I probably didn’t. Bright Eyes w as next on the bill and th e sm ooth , slow , rath er sad son gs they played w ere a w elcom e change to th e h igh er in ten sity sh ow s I’d be atten d in g all w eeken d . Bu t I d id n ’t stay for the w hole tim e as I decided to h ead over to th e T ree Stage to ch eck ou t h ip -h op n ew com er Sam A dam s. T he crow d started out sm all, but the louder he got the m ore people began to show up.It w as m y first experience w ith the Boston native, but he did a good job of m aking a fan out of m e. H is m usic is akin to that of M ac M iller an d W iz K h alifa, th at is to say it’s abou t sm okin g w eed an d bein g young, rich and stupid. H is rem ixes of A sher Roth’s “I Love C ollege” and th e fu tu re classic “N o A m erican o” w ere th e h igh ligh ts of h is p erform ance. I w ill let everyon e kn ow righ t n ow I’m not a fan of Elvis C ostello.M aybe it could be because he’s a racist (go look u p h is com m en ts abou t R ay C harles). If you w ere hoping to hear abou t h is p erform an ce th en you sh ou ld p robably ju st skip to d ay three. W h at I saw in stead w as th e m ost m in d ben d in g, face m eltin g, an d erection in d u cin g sh ow s of m y life. Bassnectar w as phenom enal. Playing the entirety of his yet to be released album at the tim e, fans w ere treated to a sneak peak of several tracks like “Boom eran g” as w ell as rem ixes of N irvan a’s “Breed ” an d Blu r’s “Son g N o. 2”. O f cou rse th e m arqu ee m om en t of th e n igh t w as h is rem ix of Ellie G ou ld in g’s “Ligh ts”. You kn ow w hen your friends tell a story and it

doesn’t m ake sense and they respond w ith “w ell I gu ess you h ad to be there”… this is one of those tim es. O n to D ay 3.

Day 3: SUNDAY Su n d ay w as th e m ellow est of th e th ree d ays an d so I’ll m ake th in gs rather quick, as I’m sure that you’re tired of read in g m y ram blin g thoughts. T o start off the day’s big nam es w as C ypress H ill. A m I a fan ? N o. C ould you have gotten a contact high w alking through the entrance for the duration of their set? Yes. N ext up w ere Beirut and Ellie G ouldin g (on d ifferen t stages of cou rse) and again,the m ore soothing,slow er m u sic th at becam e a th em e for th e day w as w elcom ed w ith open arm s. C ity and C olour cam e on after Beirut an d all th e w om en , gay m en an d even a few of the straight m en began to sw oon over D allas G reen’s voice.It w as th e kin d of aftern oon w h ere fallin g com fortably asleep on th e grass w as less of an option and m ore of inevitability. I did how ever feel the need to get up and m arch dow n to the G reen Stage for A lice G lass and the other guy in C rystal C astles. A lice G lass w as m ore than likely stoned out of her tiny little skull on a plethora of drugs, but hey, w hat can you expect from A lice G lass? I m ade it about three quarters of the w ay through “Baptism ” before som e fucking hipster elbow ed m e in the ribs. I decided to go back to the m ellow ness of the m ain stages after that. I w as greeted by Ben G ibbard and the rest of th e gen tlem en in D eath C ab for C utie. A gain I resum ed m y spot on the grass and prom ptly relaxed to “T he Sound of Settling”. I w ould have stayed for T he Flam ing Lip s, bu t lead sin ger W ayn e C oyn e in form ed u s th at h is ban d s sh ow w ould be containing bits that, and I quote, “m ay cause som e of you guys to have seizures.” I m ad e m y w ay back to th e G reen Stage to see M ST RK RFT instead. T his tim e Jesse F K eeler d id n ot d isap point and neither did his partner in crim e A l-P. It w as a great w ay to cap off th e w eeken d . A m assive electro party.I could not have been happier, to tellyou the truth.I thoroughly enjoyed both of their new tracks “Back in th e U SSA ” an d “Beard s A gain ”. I h ave also n ever seen tw o p eop le sm oke as m any cigarettes in an hour than those tw o.M ay G od have m ercy on their lungs. So th at w as it. T h at w as m y u n believably fun tim e at O sheaga. I hope you en joyed read in g abou t it as m uch as I did living it. O h , ju st by th e w ay, I m an aged to overhear a conversation betw een tw o Even ko executives w h o m ay or m ay n ot h ave been on th e p h on e w ith som eon e very close to a certain Toronto rapper,w ho form erly played Jim m y on D egrassi. I also m ay have overheard their attem pts to coax him in to com in g n ext year. It’s ju st a ru m or, bu t I su ggest w e all start crossing our fingers.

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the no touchie master4:the master 11-09-09 10:54 am Page 19

album review: Watch the throne by Jay-z and kanye West


m ore into K anye’s territory,but JayZ h old s h is ow n in som ew h at u n fam iliar su rrou n d in gs. A fter years of being in the gam e, the days of dropping unbelievable verses every tim e th ey op en th eir m ou th s are beh in d them ,but both retain their signature flow and still occasionally obtain the rare form they are fam ous for. T h e list of collaborators is a starstu d d ed affair w ith n am es su ch as Beyon cé, K id C ud i, Sw izz Beatz an d M r. H u d son all m akin g cam eos on th e albu m . Som ew h at u n exp ected , how ever,w ere appearances from the lead sin ger of th e in d ie ban d Bon Iver,Justin V ernon,and Elly Jackson of the electro-pop group La Roux. W atch th e T h ron e could be a real com ing-out party for one particular con tribu tin g artist, you n g sin ger Frank O cean, w ho sings the hook on “N o C hurch in the W ild” and “M ade in A m erica.” O cean ’s catch y ch orus w ork sh ou ld be en ou gh to in sp ire m ore th at few to ch eck out h is solo w ork.H is debut single “N ovacane” is highly recom m ended. T h e albu m ’s h igh ligh ts in clu d e “O tis," an upbeat track featuring the late soul singer O tis Redding and the god fath er of sou l h im self, Jam es

Brow n. “N o C hurch in the W ild” is a dark and purposely m uddled outing that touches on religion and m aterial excess, an d featu res th e aforem en tion ed O cean . Jay-Z’s w ife, Beyon cé K now les,m akes a cam eo on “Lift O ff” an d h er p ow erfu l vocals go a lon g w ay tow ards boosting an already uplifting song. T he album , in truth, is very sim ilar to W est’s last effort, M y Beau tifu l D ark T w isted Fantasy — abstract and eclectic, albeit w ith a som ew h at edgier tone. W atch th e T h ron e isn ’t p erfect, th ou gh . T h ere are still m om en ts w h ere W est’s eccen tricity cou ld be reined in som ew hat, and the lyrical con ten t from both W est an d Jay-Z can occasion ally be som ew h at sh allow . T h e albu m as a w h ole cou ld stand to be a little m ore focused,but at the sam e tim e such a m ove could take aw ay from on e of th e record ing’s greatest strengths, w hich is the breadth of its scope. A s good as the album is, the question lingers: could it have been better, con siderin g th e tw o m en at th e h elm ? W atch th e T h ron e w as recorded during the few openings in th e very bu sy sch ed u les of th e

RICHARD WONG tHe manitOBan (U of manitoba)

album ’s tw o leads and one can’t help bu t w on d er w h at th e resu lt cou ld have been if Jay-Z and W est had set aside all of their other obligations to record the album . Is W atch th e T h ron e h ip h op ’s defining m asterpiece? N o. It is, how ever, a very good albu m th at p rovid es a lot for follow ers of m an y genres to enjoy and w on’t disappoint fan s of eith er artist. W h eth er th ere w illever be a follow -up to this album is uncertain,but one thing is for sure — W atch the Throne is w orth a listen.

VOL. 40 ISSUE 1 - Thursday, September 8, 2011

W IN N IPEG (C U P) — A collaborative effort by tw o of tod ay's biggest nam es in hip-hop,W atch the T hrone w as origin ally in ten d ed as a fivetrack EP but evolved into a full stud io albu m u n d er th e collective creative gaze of Jay-Z an d K an ye W est. A fan tasy p airin g for m an y lon g tim e h ip -h op fan s, Jay-Z an d W est have appeared on a num ber of tracks togeth er in th e p ast, bu t th e prospect of a fullalbum from the duo h as h eap ed an im m en se am ou n t of pressure an d expectation upon th is release. Lucky for fans, then, that it m ostly lives up to its billing. W atch the T hrone is a leap into the abstract im agin ation of tw o of th e m ost innovative m inds in m usic.T he album is a diverse outing,borrow ing from m any different genres and the back tracks,but rem ains busy and industrious throughout,creating a full and enveloping sound.You w ould be hard-pressed to find any songs that are defined by any one single beat,a nod to the production and calibre of producers involved w ith such a project. W est rem ain s th e kin g of creatin g effective and catchy sam ples and the heavy instrum entals push the album


Collaborative effort from two of hip-hop's biggest names will satisfy fans of all genres

the return of the music video much refreshes the Wedge and rapCity T O RO N T O (C U P) — T he m usic-video station’s survivalis threatened in the age of instant gratification. W hen you can stream online to your h eart’s con ten t, th ere is n o m ore n eed to w ait. Bu t w h ile you d on ’t need V Js to m ake a YouT ube playlist, they’re certainly helpful in exposing you to som ething new . So it m akes sen se th at C an ad a’s beloved M u ch M u sic h as breath ed new life into tw o of its m ost beloved p rogram s of old : R ap C ity an d T h e W ed ge. Each of th ese sh ow s gave a generation of m usic fans a chance to h ear th e m u sic th ey loved w h ile inviting them to hear som ething new . T h is Jan u ary, th e sh ow s w ere rebooted givin g a w h ole n ew gen eration of fans the sam e exposure. T yron e “T -R exXx” Ed w ard s, a T oron to en trep ren eu r an d form er N C A A basketball p layer, is th e n ew host of RapC ity. “W e have an opportu n ity w ith th is sh ow , u n like an y other show ,to present rap m usic and

everyth in g th at rap m u sic h as to offer,” he said. H e’s got a genuine love for hip-hop th at kn ow s n o bou n d s. “In life, th ere’s so m an y d ifferen t ch an n els, so I think m usic should reflect that. Even w ithin the one genre,there’s so m any different types of m usic available internationally.” Broad cast in fron t of a live au d ien ce, th e p rogram sh ow cases a live D J set, freestylin g an d as m an y different videos as they can pack in. “D -Sisive can get p layed on th e sam e sh ow as W aka Flocka, w h ich I just think is so dope,” he said. T he W edge has a new life and new identity thanks to the exuberance of D am ian A brah am — also kn ow n as Pink Eyes, the frontm an of the critically acclaim ed h ard core ban d Fu cked U p . Both h e an d Ed w ard s w ere ap p roach ed for th e sh ow last year w hen the station w as looking to better represent the hip-hop and alternative com m unities on air. A bra-

h am ’s sh ow aim s to sh ow case th e m an y d ifferen t sou n d s th at fall under the giant um brella of alternative m usic. “W e’re not gonna cover every band, w e’re not gonna cover all the bases, but w e’re gonna try to be representative of a lot of different things that are going on,” said A braham . It helps,at least,to bring m usic fans from across Canada together.“Idon’t th in k T h e W edge, by an y stretch of th e im agin ation , is th e en d -all an d be-all of building a m usic scene. But it does help to have that national exp osu re of th ese typ es of m u sic to h op efu lly bu ild scen es an d exp ose people to these types of bands.” The m usic video,A braham says,still carries an im portant role in exposing people to new sounds. “A t its best and m ost pure,it can be an exten sion of th e art of th e son g. A t its w orst, it can do a disservice to a son g you really like. Bu t it d oes provide a com m ercialfor the song …

if som eon e sees a vid eo by a ban d th ey’ve n ever h eard of, h op efu lly that’ll inspire them to check out the band a little m ore.” M uchM usic has a role not just in exp osin g p eop le to m u sic, bu t C an adian m usic.Its C RT C license requires it to both play and pay into Canadian program m ing.But that’s only a good thing for C anadians. G ettin g airplay on M uch , says Ed w ard s, is “som eth in g to asp ire to if you ’re an artist. It’s som eth in g to connect to if you’re a C anadian and you’re w atching C anadian [m usic]… T h e collaboration s betw een M u ch and different bands and artists and w hatnot,those things can be the reason w hy som eone’s career goes from zero to 100 in like 60 seconds.” T he W edge airs W ednesday nights at 10 p.m .Eastern on M uch;RapC ity is on at 10 p.m . on T hursdays.

JOSH O’KANE CanaDian UniVeriSty PreSS

WHat HarPer iS nOt reaDing sent to H arper.The scribe has also inadvertently provided C anadians w ith a fantastic sum m er reading list. For a com plete com pilation of th e accom panying letters,check out M artel’s w ebsite: w h atisstep h en h arp

H ere’s a portion of the books sent to Prim e M inister Stephen H arper:

1-T he D eath of Ivan Ilych,by Leo T olstoy 2-A nim al Farm ,by G eorge O rw ell 3-T he M urder of Roger A ckroyd, by A gatha C hristie 4-By G ran d C en tral Station I Sat D ow n an d W ep t, by Elizabeth Sm art 5-Bonjour T ristesse,by Francoise Sagan 6-C andide, by V oltaire 7-Sh ort an d Sw eet: 101 V ery Short Poem s,edited by Sim on A rm itage 8-C h ron icle of a D eath Foretold,

by G abriel G arcia M arquez 9-M iss Ju lia, by A u gu st Strin d berg 10-T he W atsons, by Jane A usten 11-M aus, by A rt Spiegelm an 12-T o K ill a M ockin gbird , by H arper Lee 13-Le Petit Prince, by A ntoine de Saint-Exupery 14-O ran ges A re N ot th e O n ly Fruit, by Jeanette W interson 15-Letters to a You n g Poet, by Rainer M aria Rilke 16-T he Island M eans M inago, by M ilton A corn 17-M etam orp h osis, by Fran z K afka 18-T he Educated Im agination,by N orthrop Frye 20-T he D ragonfly of C hicoutim i, by Larry T rem blay 21-A C lockw ork O ran ge, by A ntony Burgess

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A re by M aurice Sendak and C andide by V oltaire. O n Jan . 31 of th is year, h ow ever, M artel sent his 100th and final book to th e p rim e m in ster: Scorch ed by W ajdi M ouaw ad. In the accom panying letter M artel w rites, “I said, over and over, that I w ou ld p ersist w ith ou r exclu sive book clu b as lon g as you w ere in pow er … w hile it’s been a great pleasure for m e (I don’t know about you), I’ve been d oin g it for close to fou r years now and I w ant to m ove on … It’s true, too, that I’m tired of using books as p olitical bu llets an d grenades.Books are too precious and w onderfulto be used for long in such a fashion.” In February, M artel sent one m ore book, num ber 101, as a postscript. T hough M artel’s four-year literary and political endeavour didn’t yield a sin gle resp on se from th e p rim e m inister, the project has not gone to w aste. Random H ouse has published a com pilation of m any of the letters, w hich becam e the 66th book M artel


O TTA W A (C U P) — O n A pril14,2007, C an ad ian au th or Yan n M artel d ecided to take on the prim e m inister. T he Life of Pi author, disenchanted w ith the quality of arts appreciation and funding in C anada, m ade a declaration in T he G lobe and M ail: “For as lon g as Step h en H arp er is Prim e M in ister of C an ad a, I vow to sen d h im every tw o w eeks, m ailed on a M onday,a book that has been know n to expand stillness.T hat book w illbe in scribed an d w ill be accom p an ied by a letter I w ill have w ritten.” A n d sin ce th at d ay, M artel h as stau n ch ly u p h eld h is w ord . For n early fou r years, Step h en H arp er h as received provocative, w itty an d inform ative letters exploring accom p an yin g grap h ic n ovels, religiou s scriptures, poetry, children’s books, song lyrics,dram a scripts and novels carefully selected by the prom inent C anadian literary figure. A nd the list has certainly been diverse: R ead A ll A bou t It! by Lau ra an d Jen n a Bu sh h as been m ailed alon g w ith W h ere th e W ild T h in gs

the no touchie master4:the master 11-09-09 10:55 am Page 20



Place bananas and yogurt in blender and blend on low until sm ooth. A d d ad d ition al in gred ien ts an d blend on high. Serve im m ediately or place in fridge for later. Serves 1-2


2 ripe bananas

2 slices w hole grain bread

1 cup fat free plain G reek

3-4 slices extra lean turkey

yogurt (or flavoured yogurt)

cold cuts

½ cup pineapple juice

¼ cup baby spinach leaves

½ cup orange juice

1-2 tbsp honey m ustard

1 cup berries ½ tsp vanilla extract 2 tbsp hem pseed (optional if needed for extra protein)

SUPER BANANA MUFFINS!!! 2 cups w hole w heat flour

Spread honey m ustard sauce on one slice of bread. Spread avocado on additional slice. A dd half of the spinach leaves on one slice of bread, and place the cold cuts right on top. (O r, add the m ozzarella in betw een the turkey slices.) A dd the rem aining spinach leaves and place the avocado spread bread slice on top. Serves 1

sauce 1-2 tbsp very ripe avocado 1 slice m ozzarella cheese (optional)

1 tsp baking soda

VOL. 40 ISSUE 1 - Thursday, September 8, 2011

¼ tsp salt ¼ cup low fat m argarine, m elted Preheat oven at 350 degrees F (175 degrees C ) and spray pan w ith Pam . In a sm all bow l, ad d flou r, bakin g sod a, salt an d cin n am on . In a large bow l, m ix m argarin e, ap p lesau ce, vanilla, eggs and bananas. A dd dry ingredients to the large bow l and m ix until w ell blended. Pour batter into pan, and cover w ith tin foil. Bake for 40-45 m inutes, but it is recom m en d ed to ch eck on it often . C h eck by placin g a tooth pick into the loaf. O nce it begins to firm up, take foil off to let it brow n, and bake it for an ad d ition al 5-10 m in utes.



T allahassee, Florida native, rappa ternt sanga and iPhone app creator T -Pain has three of his ow n studio album s; each w ith its ow n array of catchy singles and m elodious beats, but this is not w here T -Pain’s bread and butter is. O h no, w here w e see T -Pain shine is in his collaborations w ith other artists. In no particular order here are the best songs T -Pain has graced w ith his autotuned presence

¼ cup unsw eetened applesauce 2 eggs, beaten (or ½ cup egg w hites) 2 cups over ripe m ashed bananas 2 tsp vanilla 1 tsp cinnam on 3 tbsp H em p seed (optional

‘G ood Life’ by K anye W est – I begin w ith this song because it truly reflects how som eone like T -Pain has risen from poverty and becom e a m illionaire by singing about how aw esom e it is to bang girls and ride in expensive cars and have a ton of ridiculous jew elry. W elcom e to the good life T -Pain, you deserve it.

#2 ‘I’m So H ood’ by D J K haled – O nce you get past the crazy Palestinian m an, D J K haled, calling people the N w ord T -Pain kicks in w ith the cho-

many a collegiate will see their hopes of new-apartment freedom crushed by a lack of funds and poor cooking skills. eat canned pasta three meals less a day and save money with Barbara’s propositions. they were written with flatmates in mind and will hopefully be featured here all semester.

if w anted extra protein)

rus about how he w ears his pants low , represents his neighborhood and w ears gold in his m outh. A s a w hite boy raised in the suburbs, I can com pletely relate to w hat he’s talking about. W hat’s m agical about T -Pain is he can bring all different people together through song, be they w hite, black, or even Palestinian. T hanks T -Pain, m aybe you can solve the crisis in the M iddle East.



The Arts Editor Says:

‘Low ’ by Flo Rida – W ithout T -Pain how w ould any of us know the kind of girl that he and Flo Rida are into? I m ean he’s basically filling out a M survey of w hat he likes in his potential partners. So all you D aw sonites w ith your baggy sw eat pants and the Reeboks w ith the strap, I know a certain som eone w ith an affinity for top hats that is definitely interested.

#4 ‘I’m A Flirt Rem ix’ by R. K elly – T his is w here T -Pain show s m any of his talents. N ot only does he allude

to his great w ealth, having 28-inch rim s on no doubtingly a C adillac, but also he tells of his prow ess w ith w om en, “A ll I gotta go is flirt w it her and I get dem draw ers.” T -Pain also speaks Spanish in this verse. W hat can’t he do? N othing, that’s w hat.

#5 ‘I’m O n a Boat’ by T he Lonely Island – T his song w ould be nothing w ithout T -Pain. I’m glad that A ndy Sam berg has his nautical them ed pashm ina afghan but it cannot com pare to T -Pain’s nautical them ed T O P H A T . A s aw esom e as T he Lonely Island is none of them have fucked a m erm aid. A nd until then, T -Pain: 1, everyone else on a boat: 0

next week, look for top five Picks in the voices section, performed by Sir Oliver nacey.

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the no touchie master4:the master 11-09-09 10:55 am Page 21

21 EDITOR: Samantha Mileto CONTACT: VOL. 40 ISSUE 1 - Thursday, September 8, 2011

Going for gold


men ALEXANDRA ESHWEILER STAFF WRITER Expectations w ere high at D aw son’s annualA A A m en’s basketballtryouts w ere held by coach W ayne Yearw ood on A u gu st 29, 30 an d 31 in th e school’s gym s one and tw o. T h e tryou ts con sisted of d rills, w h ich in clu d ed ru n n in g in lin es, p assin g th e basketball back an d forth, stretching and a few four-onfou r gam es. T h e A A Basketball coaches w ere also present during the tryou ts in ord er to h elp Yearw ood choose his team and w hich players to cut.The players cut w illend up playing on the A A team . Last season’s team w as a good one, w inning 13 out of the 16 gam es they played.Yearw ood is hopefulw ith this season’s new players. “If w e do the things that w e should do, are supposed to do, good things w ill happen and I hope they w ill do better than they did last year, that’s alw ays a goal for u s, I’m op tim istic that w e can do better,” he said.

Blues in action

WOmen Yearw ood rem ain s h op efu l even though the team lost Jonathan Sm ith, on e of th eir valu able p layers alon g w ith Ridolphe A ristil. “I exp ect u s to p lay h ard an d to give a good representation of the college and to go out there, doing w hat w e have to do, putting it on the line an d d oin g th e best w e can ,” Yearw ood said. D esp ite th e h igh exp ectation s, Yearw ood hopes that this season the players w ill act m ore as a team . “I w ould like the guys to focus on helping their team m ate to be m ore of a success,not focus on them selves so m u ch ; [W e h ad th at] p roblem in a couple of guys last year so hopefully w e don’t have that this year,” Yearw ood said. Yearw ood believes th is basketball team w ill be an interesting one w ith lots of talent. “W e got som e good p layers com ing,” Yearw ood said.

Put your left foot in, put your left foot out

ABIGAIL DE BURGH GALWEY STAFF WRITER T h e D aw son Blu es W om en ’s Basketball team gathered T uesday night for a second night of try-outs as the coach es an d p layers aim for a first place finish at the N ationals. The tryouts started at 6 p.m .w ith a series of pass exercises, lay-ups, defen se exercises, an d a w h ole lot of running.Som e tripped and staggered or lost the ball or m issed their shots.

Photo Credit: Homebline Dumas

"T errible,terrible,everyone’s clustered in,be organized!" Coach Trevor W illiam s w ou ld say an d w ith in th e first half hour m ost of the team w as out of breath. "[T hey are] a little out of shape so w e’re goin g to w ork on con d ition in g," assistan t coach A m an d a M aks said. V eteran point guard K eshia Lespoir agreed w ith her coach and adm itted to being out of breath. "I'm w orking on it, I'm w orking on it," she said. T he team lost tw o players this sea-

Shooting for success STEFANIE BROSS STAFF WRITER O n A ug. 22 the A A A m en’s soccer try-outs w ere com pleted as 12 rookies joined the rem aining 10 veterans on th e fin al roster. T h e team w ill begin to p rep are for th e u p com in g season w h ere both p layers an d coach es kn ow exactly w h ere th ey need to im prove to m ove deeper into the playoffs. T ry-ou ts began on A u g. 2 an d lasted three w eeks. "W e had 33 A A A p layers try-ou t," H ead C oach A lessan d ro Salvon i said . "W e on ly took 22 and so it w as very difficult to choose everyone".

“T h e rookies m ess very w ell w ith th e team ," V eteran M id -field er M ichaelM cIntyre said,given the fact th e m ajority of th e team are n ew com ers. Last year,the team finished in second place in the cham pionship, and first in provincials,sending the team to th e n ation als. "W e w ere h ap p y w ith the outcom e last year w hen you th in k th at ju st tw o years ago th e team finished last," Salvoni said. "T h is year w e're goin g to kn ow w h at to exp ect [at n ation als], w e're goin g to n eed to w ork on ou r d efence," V eteran M id-Fielder Salvatore Falbo said. T his season,the Blues w illbe w ithou t D an ilo Pessoa an d Felip e C osta

d e Sou za, each scorin g 10 an d six goals respectively. "W e lost tw o good players," Falbo said . "W e've got a lot of n ew s gu ys though, and a lot of returning guys to take their spot." “The biggest difference this year is w e're going to need to keep the ball an d m ove it u p th e field m ore," M cIntyre said. "Instead of just kickin g an d ru n n in g like w e d id last year." T h e team p ractices fou r tim es a w eek, w ith on e an d som etim es tw o gam es a w eek as w ell. "T here are seven team s in our division an d six out of seven of th em are quite good," Salvoni said,"T here isn't just one team that stands out to

Get ready to ruck shit up

Photo Credit: Homebline Dumas

son and w as happy to see a lot of returning players such as last season’s top scorer M arylise R oy-V iau , an d V eterans Janice Q uintos and Lespoir. A ccordin g to th e coach es, th e rookies w ere looking good and w ere up to their expectations. "W e h ave a good team ,” Lesp oir said. "W e have good chem istry.” W illiam s agreed and said that w hat m akes this season’s team good is the depth;“a good m ix of experience and new .” The Blues m ade it allthe w ay to the sem i-finals at provincials last season bu t w ere d efeated by th e M on tm orency N om ades 75-65.They s w on th e silver m ed al an d cam e th ird at n ation als. T h e coach es keep aim in g higher and are no less discouraged. "O bviously, our goal is to w in th e gold." A ssistant C oach A m anda M aks said. T h e coach es said th ey go in to every season w ith confidence. “W e’re read y,” W illiam s said . “W e’ve been knocking on the door to N ation als every year an d I th in k w e’re ready.”


Ready to roll Photo Credit: us as being our biggest com petition."

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BRENDEN DI VITTORI STAFF WRITER T h e sem ester is u n d er w ay, an d th e D aw son M en ’s ru gby team is lookin g to defen d th eir title as Region al C h am p s albeit w ith som e fresh faces on the roster. W ith a h igh n u m ber of rookies trying out,this year’s coaching staff w illhave difficult decisions to m ake as they fill up the open spots on the team . “T h e rookies th is year h ave a lot of tech n ical skill,” assistan t coach R yan Leen h ou ts said . “A n d all ou r key veterans are returning.” T his year’s team looks to focus on speed, as opposed to pure physical dom ination. “Instead of turning big guys into rugby players,w e have a lot of guys w ho are com ing in w ith prior experience,” explained Leenhouts. D aw son claim ed its first Regional C h am p ion sh ip title last season , breakin g Joh n A bott C ollege’s 16gam e w in n in g streak. Secon d -year w in ger C aleb Jord an said th at th e p oten tial Blu es h ave a lot of skill, an d th ey h ave been com in g in droves to the try-outs. Jord an also ad d ed th at th e team exp ects n oth in g less th an back-toback cham pionships. Leen h ou ts attribu ted th is to last year’s su ccess an d believes th at m ore rookies h ave tried ou t th is year, d u e to last year’s p erform ance “It’s good for th e Blu es’ m en tality after so m an y years of A bott d om in atin g; it’s good to finally get over that hurdle,and to go into this season know ing you’re the best,” he said. T he team w ill hold its last tryout on Sep t. 7, after w h ich th e 20112012 Blu es w ill attem p t to retain their spot as Regional C ham ps.

the no touchie master4:the master 11-09-09 10:55 am Page 22


Tragedy strikes the NHL


T he N H L (N ational H ockey League) suffered another tragic loss w hen form er N ash ville Pred ator en forcer W ade Belak, 35, took his ow n life at h is d ow n tow n T oron to con d o last W ednesday. Belak’s m oth er, Lorain e, told th e C BC on Friday that her son w as battlin g depression , th ough h e seem ed to be “taking control” of his disease. "H e w as a great h u sban d , a great father, a w onderful son and w e w ere so p rou d of h im ," sh e said to C BC through tears. Belak becom es th e th ird N H L en forcer to d ie th is su m m er. Form er N ew York R an ger tou gh gu y D erek Boogard d ied in h is M in n eap olis hom e in M ay at the age of 28, w hen he m ixed drugs w ith alcohol.Tw entyseven -year-old R ick R yp ien d ied in A ugust in his southern A lberta hom e after also com m ittin g su icid e. Like Belak, the one-tim e C anuck suffered from depression. T he deaths of three enforcers in a span of four m onths has stirred som e con troversy across th e N H L. Som e, like form er M ontreal C anadiens forw ard C h ris N ilan , kn ow n as on e of the greatest heavyw eights of his generation , qu ickly blam ed th at th eir roles in the N H L as the causes of their death s an d th in ks figh tin g n eeds to be banned from the N H L forever. "T h e N H L sh ould ban figh tin g be-

cau se it's n o lon ger a factor in th e gam es," th e Boston n ative told Q M I A gen cy , reported T h e T oron to Sun , ad d in g th at th ese d ays, tou gh gu ys are only in the league to fight,unlike in his tim e,w hen enforcers w ere also encouraged to play the gam e. O th ers, like an oth er ex-C an adien s scrap p er, G eorges Laraqu e, believe that there are bigger problem s in the N H L,such as cheap shots to the head. "A llthe form er guys I used to fight, and w ho think they (the N H L) should ph ase th at out, th ey m ake m e w an t to puke," Laraque told 880 A M radio in Edm onton, reported T he T oronto Sun . "T h at's selfish , because th ere's an oth er gu y like m e w h o w on 't be talented enough (skill-w ise) to m ake it to the N H L." In the N H L’s defense, they plan to im prove on the substance abuse program that is currently in place for its p layers. T h e N H L an d N H LPA (N ationalH ockey League Players’association ) cam e ou t w ith a join t statem en t sayin g th e N H L is, “com m itted to a th orou gh evalu ation of our existing assistance program s and p ractices an d w ill m ake im m ed iate m odification s an d im provem en ts to th e exten t th ey are d eem ed w arranted.” Boogard and Rypien w ere both patients of the program , w hile it is still unknow n w hether Belak had entered

the program , although he w as treating his depression before his death. A s soon as n ew s broke of Belak’s d eath , p layers, coach es, an d staff took to th e in tern et to issu e th eir condolences. "I'm lost for w ords.W ade Belak RIP m y friend," read a tw eet from Belak’s form er T oron to M ap le Leafs team m ate O w en N olan. “T he entire N ashville Predators organization and fam ily is shocked and sad d en ed by th e su d d en an d u n tim ely passing of W ade Belak. W ade w as a beloved m em ber of the organ-

Wade Belak with his daughter

ization,a terrific team m ate and w onderful father and husband w ho w ill be greatly m issed. O ur thoughts and p rayers go ou t to h is w ife Jen n ifer an d ch ild ren A n d ie an d A lex. W e offer our full support to them at this very d ifficu lt tim e,” th e N ash ville Predators said in a statem ent according to T SN . Belak is su rvived by h is w ife Jen nifer and his tw o children. Belak w as in T oron to to film th e upcom ing season of the popular reality show Battle of the Blades,aired on C BC .

Photo Credit:

Around the Leagues with Oliver Nacey Football

EDITOR: Samantha Mileto CONTACT:

VOL. 40 ISSUE 1 - Thursday, September 8, 2011


retired nHl player Wade Belak commits suicide in toronto hotel

W e have footballthis year.Yayyyy! N ot just C FL either. A fter m on th s of ton gu e-w aggin g the N FL Players A ssociation and the N FL ow ners signed a 10-year collective bargain in g agreem en t an d subsequently saved C hristm as. T he extended process did shorten th e offseason h ow ever an d th e free agency period w as as exciting as that octopus putting itself in a box.Super exciting. T he biggest dealw as top free agent N nam di A som ugha's decision to piss everybody off and go to the Philadelphia Eagles w ho also signed M ichael "D ogfigh t" V ick to h is secon d $100,000,000 contract. A lso,Peyton M anning is unlikely to start the season behind center for the Indianapolis C olts after an operation on h is n eck. W h ich is good for an y fan w ho dislikes the Colts suprem acy, that is to say every fan. The season starts on Thursday w ith a p reviou s Su p erbow l ch am p ion s m atch up betw een th e N ew O rlean s Sain ts an d th e G reen Bay Packers. W atch it. Basketball H ear m e now .T here w illbe no N BA season th is year. W h ich m ean s n o R ajon R on d o, n o K evin D u ran t an d no M etta W orld Peace. O h yeah , R on A rtest ch an ged h is nam e to M etta W orld Peace. T h ere w ere also a lot of false ru m ours about stars like K evin D urant and K obe Bryant heading to Europe if th e season is w ell an d tru ly can celled. D eron W illiam s, h ow ever, w ill be h ead in g to T u rkey an d Eu roleagu e w ith Besiktas. A part from this rather unexcitin g n ew s th e h oop s scen e h as been aw fully slow . Baseball Is it surprising that baseball hasn’t changed at all? N o, it isn’t. The M ajor Leagues have been floatin g alon g in th eir regu lar w ay all

sum m er. D erek Jeter d id get h is 3,000 h it how ever,w hich w ould be im pressive for any other player.I just don’t like Jeter. Jim T h om e h it h is 600 h om er, w hich is an incredible feat for an incredibly hardy player. Justin V erlander is tearing up the leagu e on h is w ay to a C y You n g pitching aw ard and possibly M V P. A bout 20 gam es rem ain in the season an d w h ile m ost of th e p layoff spots w ere decided w eeks ago there is stilla lot of baseballleft.Bet you’re really excited. Soccer T h e soccer scen e w as relatively qu iet u n til abou t tw o w eeks ago w h en m ost of th e European leagues started and the transfer deadline arrived. Perhaps the biggest transfer of the su m m er w as th e C esc Fabregas’ exp ected d ep artu re from A rsen al to Barcelona, his boyhood team . D esp ite rabid sp en d in g from th e G ooners on deadline day they appear to h ave fallen from th eir T op 4 perch.That hurt to say.I’m a G unner for life. Shit,alm ost forgot about the other league. W ait, th at’s because th ey’re boring. G olf N ah , I’m ju st kid d in g. G olf’s n ot w orth it. H ockey T h e C an ad ien s sign ed Erik C ole. D oes anyone notice how sw iftly this article descended into shittyness? T h ere h as been a lot of d ou bt abou t Sid n ey C rosby’s fu tu re bu t Penguins M edia peeps cam e out and said th at w h ile h e is im p rovin g h is n ear fu tu re is u n certain . C rosby seem s to believe he w ill play at som e point this season. C ool cool cool. P.S.C anada’s going to get thrashed by N ew Zealand at the Rugby W orld C up.It’s gonna be w ay funny for m e.

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the no touchie master4:the master 11-09-09 10:55 am Page 23

23 EDITOR: Maricar-Kristine Montes CONTACT: VOL. 40 ISSUE 1 - Thursday, September 8, 2011

PEARLS / masyu.

instructions: Connect all the pearls together with one path. you must make a 90 degree turn with everyblack pearl. you can’t turn right after or before a black pearl. for the white pearls, you must go through them and turn imediately after or before, even both if you must.



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the no touchie master4:the master 11-09-09 10:55 am Page 24

The Plant volume 40 issue 1  

Catchin' Your Cooties since 1969

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