it takes me right back
“
Ping. One email. Ping-ping! The ‘cooking’ continued for the Another two. Not a single day next few hours and by the time I goes by without me receiving arose it was, aptly, reminiscent of a message from a PR flaunting cornflakes. Even after showering, their scent-free fake tan formula. the scent would keep oscillating In-shower technology! A bronzing between coconut and metal, ‘water!’ Mousses to be rinsed reaching a crescendo of burnt off BEFORE bed... no overnight coffee. BANG. BRONZED! development required! Later in the evening, not There are obvious plus points to content with mahogany, Amy and all that tannovation. It’s good news I would continue to gild ourselves. for the boyfriends and white sheets This time it was with Rimmel and mums – no longer scrubbing Sunshimmer Instant Tan – creating at tangoed dresses while fretting if a chocolate box of colours to their millennial daughters will ever complement our body-con get on the property ladder. dresses. (We’d help reach each But it’s the end of an era – the other’s backs, which I’m convinced death of the ‘going out’ smell. For is the reason we’ve stayed best me, at least, nothing says ‘partyfriends eight years on.) Like the time’ like the scent of DHA [the ‘twist ‘n’ glug’ of a wine bottle, beauty industry’s most frequently that crack of the lid and first used self-tanning agent] on skin. breath of the scent catapulted me It began with Johnson’s to ‘playtime’ and unadulterated Holiday Skin Body Lotion – at 17 fun. It was the transition from years old, when paid-for family dissertation to dancefloor. getaways were a thing of the Fast-forward a couple of past and NDubz’s Tulisa was my years and I had graduated from Most people can’t stand the beauty icon. The bottle might university, moved back home and have said ‘gradual’ but the whiff scored my job as a junior beauty scent of a faux glow – but for certainly wasn’t – an instant glug writer. My role at a celebritybeauty editor Amber Ascroft obsessed magazine came with of yogurt-y apricot laden with artificial sweeteners. On Fridays, access to the man with the it will always be the smell of a in particular, the aroma would fill golden gun – James Harknett, good time the corridors of my all-girls school. spray-tanner to the stars. I’ve A thick cloud of fake tan aroma, since visited his wonder booth, spiked with giddiness and Vera at the plush W London hotel, the Wang Princess, it was a badge of honour that proved your night before every holiday. Today, the scent of that space ‘party girl’ status. whisks me to olfactory heaven – an unbeatable sense of When I started university not long after, high-octane glamour and ‘Out Of Office’… ON! my housemate Amy introduced me to the Unsurprisingly, there’s not a whisper of Kellogg’s harder stuff. St Moriz Self Tan Mousse or McVities in James’s little sanctuary, though came with a deeper hue and the amped– that would probably put the glitterati off. up fragrance to match. I’d apply it in Instead, visitors bask in a decadent blend the evening then hop into bed, letting of fig, sandalwood and jasmine candles the scent develop as I snoozed. As it swirled with essential oils from the spa’s transitioned hour after hour, more layers massage room. James’s tan elixir itself of scent developed than in the most is zingy and uplifting, making for a truly carefully-curated designer perfumes. hedonistic haze. I’d float off to the land of nod in a The next time I inhale that aroma will be bubble of white flowers and lush coconut. ahead of my hen ‘do’ – and after that, for my By dawn, as the street lamps switched off and wedding day this autumn. Forget being whisked other students were only just zig-zagging home, it back to my nuptials via the blooms in my bouquet; had baked. The warm digestive biscuit aroma mixed with I know what scent will still hold the strongest time wafts of Asda Lavender Fabric Conditioner from my sheets. travel power for me in five years time…
Fake tan
”
“ The warm digestive biscuit aroma mixed with wafts of Asda Lavender Fabric Conditioner from my sheets” 58 The scented Letter
