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Some strange music draws me in by olivia cellamare

They say you should never meet your heroes. That when you do, it will be the most disappointing thing ever. Those that claim this have never watched a 3D film. Now that is disappointing. I don’t like going on about any musicians I’ve met or interviewed; mainly because I don’t want to ever sound like a pretentious dick. However there is one woman in particular that I met this year that, if it is the only thing anyone remembers me for- then so be it. I am utterly fine with it. Alright so, in April my mum and I went to see Patti Smith in a tiny venue. The venue only seated around 150 people. As I looked around part of me was annoyed. No one here looked like they understood Patti’s music. By this, no one looked like they knew what Punk was or where CBGB was located. This brief stint of snobbery in my mind passed as I remembered that this wasn’t a typical Patti Smith concert. It was going to be her singing a couple of songs and reading poetry. To be honest, I’d have been okay with her reading the telephone directory to me. I wouldn’t care. Just to be in the same room as her was enough. I’m with my mum. My mum is a pretty pushy lady when she wants/needs to be. I think this is because she’s from Yorkshire. The only decent place in the North of England. A glorious county. The best county. At the end of the gig, she sees Tony Shanahan packing up the guitars and strides up to the stage. I feel like a teenager again, when everything around you becomes wonderfully embarrassing and nothing can save you from it. After she speaks to him, he disappears. Did she insult his shoes or something? He emerges after what seems an eternity. He was gone for about 5 minutes. He calls us over. Cue my heart feeling like it is going to fall out of my chest and a mass feeling of nausea takes over. I try to calm down thinking he will take my books off me and ask Patti to sign them. That is what will happen. That doesn’t happen at all. We’re taken into a room that is ridiculously small. In this room Patti and her sister, Linda are sat. I want to unleash a flurry of expletives because things like this do not happen. Things like this aren’t meant to happen. Have you ever embarrassed yourself in front of someone you really like? Trust


The Miscreant - Issue 41  

Featuring Jeffrey Lewis!