For the week of Thursday, March 7th, 2013 â€˘ Volume 46, Issue 23
March 7, 2013 • 02
Campus Beat News Features Entertainment Top Story Procrastination Opinion Sports Lifestyle TLFs Students’ Union Classifieds The Meliorist: Mel-io-rism (meel’e riz’m) the doctrine that the world tends to become better or may be made better by human effort
4-5 6-7 8 - 11 12 - 15 16 - 17 18 19 20 21 - 23 24 - 25 26 - 27 30 An autonomous body, separate from the U of L Students’ Union SU-166, 4401 University Drive West, Lethbridge, AB, T1K 3M4 Phone: 403-329-2334 www.themeliorist.ca
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Leyland Bradley The Meliorist is the student newspaper of the University of Lethbridge, published most Thursdays throughout the academic year by The Meliorist Publishing Society, an autonomous incorporated body. Please address all correspondence to The Meliorist, 4401 University Drive, Lethbridge Alberta, T1K 3M4, or drop it off at room SU-166. Deadline for submissions is Friday at 4 p.m. The Meliorist appreciates and encourages the writing of thoughtful, concise, timely letters. However, the Meliorist will only consider for publication those letters that are signed by the author. Special arrangements may be made for those wishing anonymity, but absolutely no pseudonyms. Letters should contain the author’s legible name, address, telephone number, and student identification number. The address, ID and phone number will not be published. The Meliorist reserves the right to edit submissions and will not print libelous material. Letters may be edited for brevity, clarity, and legality.
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Andrew Martin Cover
Letter to the Editor Dear Editor: Rant alert: The Meliorist has professional-looking posters that are hung in a professional manner and at eﬀective places without too much repetition. Their message has already convinced me to vote yes for an increase in the fee. The student government candidate posters, on the other hand, are oversimpliﬁed, hung with duct tape and placed in the most absurd places (although I have yet to see one at the bottom of a urinal). They
litter the university campus to the point of insanity. Trash and litter, not to mention waste. This is not professionalism – this is ludicrous. If the posters are any sign of the characters of the candidates, they tell me one thing: that the candidates are a superﬁcial group of people who care more about the amount of posters that are littered around the campus than about the quality and eﬀectiveness of their message (if they have any). If the candidates don’t take their job
seriously enough to campaign with professionalism, I want to have no part in electing any one of them. Peter Goertzen
VP University Hall
SU CANDIDATES 2013 My name is Jesse Baker and I was raised in Strathmore, Alberta. I am a fourth year English major and I am planning on being a police officer once I graduate. I enjoy the gym, sports, and playing guitar! As the current Vice President of University Hall, I am confident that I possess the experience necessary to tackle the new challenges and responsibilities that will come with an increased residence population. I am Jessica Mariano. I am a first year RA running for the fabulous position of Vice President of University Hall. Love where you live, and live in the community you help breed. If elected, my goals are to: -Continue developing a strong U Hall community. -Host new/exciting events. -Bridge the gap between U Hall and Kainai first years. Remember, down the hill isn't so grim if you love where you live! Say yes to Jess! My name is Tim Fairs. I am a third year history and psychology major. I was born and raised in Calgary, AB. If elected as Vice-President Parkway I will be an approachable, accessible, and an open-minded advocate for everyone in the Parkway section and residence as a whole. My main area of focus and development will be the improvement of Paterson Centre and its surrounding area. I strongly believe in continuous communication and accountability.
Hi! I'm Shelley Qian. I'm in a two-year management degree at U of L's Calgary Campus. If you see me, say "Hi!" I look forward to chatting you up. Team spirit! Cohesion! Community. Let me be your Calgary Representative. I'll build involvement and support for all U of L students, follow up with the YWCA referendum, and create more opportunities to network within our respective fields of study, so that we can graduate confidently, with employment offers at hand.
I am currently a second year English, pre-education major and the resident assistant of C-Sec. I’m originally from Trochu, AB. I’m super excited about the changes we will be experiencing in Fall 2013 – I hope to help shape the new position of VP Coulee View and look forward to building an amazing team of RAs to help me make next year memorable for everyone!
My name is Kendra Selk and I am from Nanton, AB. I’m a second year kinesiology student and this year I am an RA on D/E 1. I believe I would be a good choice for VP Coulee View because I am approachable, easy going, and I have a lot of new ideas to bring about. One plan of mine is to make a study room with bean bag chairs available for students!
Hey! My name is Amy Tarnowski. I’m the RA in Piikani and an English/ed major. I am passionate about people, and believe that participating in the residence community makes a huge difference in the lives of students. I am running for VP Coulee View. I believe that my two years of RA experience makes me the ideal candidate. If elected I will improve the social spaces within residence and represent my peers with integrity. Ciao for now!
These candidates are also running in the election but their information was unavailable at the time of production.
VP Coulee View
International Avro Mazumder Edmonton Campus Shashikant Ghai Calgary Campus Jeremy A. Villas Arts and Science Representatives Quinton Flint
March 7, 2013 • 05
Arts and Science Representatives
six positions available My name is Megan Sutherland and I am excited to be running for your new Arts and Science Representative. I am a second year math major wanting to make a change to our Students’ Union. With your support I believe we can have more student involvement, more school spirit, and more super awesome events. Vote Megan if you want more!
Hi there! My name is Brenna Scott and I am running to become an Arts & Science Rep. I am a second year English major with the future ambition of pursuing a career in journalism or public relations. The initiatives I hope to achieve with this election are as follows: lobby to improve wifi, ability to use Bridge Bucks for laundry facilities in residence areas, and continue to promote student engagement around school. As a fourth year general humanities major who wants to be a voice in the university, being one of the Arts and Science reps is an excellent way to get more involved and I'm excited to have a chance be the channel of communication between the faculty and the ULSU. Join me on Facebook and let me know what issues you want heard!
My name is Melissa Bond and I am running for one of six Arts and Science Representative positions. I am a second year B.Sc. kinesiology major and I take great pride in our school. I am currently a member of the Volunteer Core and Student Engagement Committee helping to organize student events. As Arts and Science Rep., I would bring your student voice to the General Assembly meetings so together we can improve student life.
Hello U of L! My name is Charlie Smith and I hope to be one of your Arts & Science Reps in the upcoming ULSU election! I am a fourth year history and economics student. I am involved in many clubs, Greek Life, and I have much experience in the Mentor/U-Crew program. My platform is focused on club promotion and on protecting the interests of arts and science students. Let's make student life even better! My name is Victoria Wells and I am from Calgary, Alberta. I am currently in my third year as a humanities and human resources double major and currently sit on the General Assembly as an Arts and Science representative. I also work in the Student Life office as a mentor for new students. I love the University of Lethbridge and want to share all of its great qualities with the rest of the community.
Re-elect Brandon McNally for ULSU Art and Science Representative. My name is Brandon McNally and I am a second year political science major. I am currently serving as one of your six Arts and Science faculty representatives. I am looking to be re-elected to continue serving the students of my faculty and work with the various advocacy outputs our institutions have to keep student issues a priority locally, provincially, and federally. My name is Dee Goyal and I am a third year neuroscience student. I ardently believe in electing capable leaders to represent the student population, and capability, in my opinion, is directly linked with experience. Over the last three years, I have been highly involved around campus: leading two clubs, iGEM, organizing fundraisers, etc. As a mature, experienced undergraduate, I intend to serve as your SU Arts & Science Representative in order to create new opportunities and experiences on campus. My name is Lisa Hildebrand; I am from Grande Prairie, Alberta. I was VP of the Students’ Association of Grande Prairie College for two years before I transferred to the U of L, where I currently pursue my passion for non-profit organizations. As your Arts and Science Rep., my platform is simple: Awareness. I want to be a true representative for students: inform myself, ask questions, get answers, and share with the student body.
comments made at U of L Leyland Bradley | News Editor
In a series of events that the National Post has declared unwarranted, Tom Flanagan has been stripped of titles and ties with some Canadian organizations such as the CBC, after uproar over his response to a question about child pornography last Wednesday. The former advisor for Stephen Harper made an appearance at the U of L as a guest speaker for the Southern Alberta Council of Public Affairs to discuss changes to the Indian Act. Flanagan was asked to express his thoughts on a past comment he made to a Manitoba newspaper about the relation between child pornography and the residential schools that oppressed aboriginal children. Flanagan was captured on camera saying, “I certainly have no sympathy for child molesters, but I do have some grave doubts about putting people in jail because of their taste in pictures.” Audience members reacted with jeers and booing, while Flanagan attempted to further explain himself by saying, “It’s a real issue of personal liberty and to what extent we put people in jail for doing something in which they do not
harm another person.” The latter comment has generated the most amount of backlash to do with confusion and upset as to what Flanagan meant by child pornography being a victimless crime. His responses were posted online in the form of a video filmed by audience member Arnell Tailfeathers. The video was shown on television the following morning, as breaking news of the story surfaced. The CBC has subsequently dropped Flanagan as a commentator for the CBC News Political Panel. Official statements made from the office of the prime minister’s Twitter handle said, “Tom Flanagan’s comments on child pornography are repugnant, ignorant, and appalling.” The province’s Wildrose Party issued a statement declaring that Flanagan
would no longer be involved in the party’s future operations. Flanagan released a public apology the following day stating that he “apologize(s) unreservedly to all who were offended by my statement, and most especially to victims of sexual abuse and their families,” and that his words were “badly chosen.” Debate from a number of major Canadian news outlets go as far as to say that what happened to Flanagan is unfair, and that under the circumstances, Flanagan would not have been able to provide a fuller context for his views. Currently Flanagan is a political science professor at the University of Calgary with his retirement date set for June of this year.
March 7, 2013 • 07
Local students to travel to
on medical aid trip
Photo courtesy of FDOC
Maggie Kogut News Contributor
This July, six students from the U of L will be travelling to El Salvador on a 10-day medical aid trip with The Flying Doctors of Canada (FDOC). Jesse Johnson, Miriam Belsheim, Alexandra Garven, Katelyn Ryan, Jennifer Lapointe, and Candice Evernden have been selected by the organization along with six students each from the University of Alberta and the University of Calgary to participate in this international volunteer project. Before departure, the students are responsible for raising funds and awareness in their campus and community for FDOC. In order to succeed on their medical aid trip, raising funds is crucial for FDOC students. Half of the funds raised will go toward the purchase of essential medical supplies to carry out medical work in El Salvador, while the other half of funds raised will go toward reducing travel costs for the students, accommodation, immunizations, etc. By raising more funds, students will be able to bring more medical supplies to El Salvador. Supporting the FDOC students not only helps them achieve their goals in working with FDOC in El Salvador, it also helps bring more
substantial aid through supplies to the areas that the students will work in. Not to mention, supporting the FDOC Lethbridge students can be really fun through the great events that they are organizing. On March 23 at 9 p.m., the FDOC Lethbridge students will be hosting The Sky Party at Ric’s Bar and Grill. The event will have everything that will certainly make for a great night including free appetizers, raffle prizes, and live music from The Bradford Whites, Penny Fortune, and Jesse Northey. The event will also be DJed by DJ Riley Miller, who is the president of the Disc Jockey Student Association of Lethbridge (DJSAL). DJSAL is a group of student DJs who assist club or fundraiser events for experience and exposure. Tickets are $15 and will be on sale in the Students’ Union building from March 18 until March 22. As well, the FDOC students successfully hosted a “Tight n’ Bright” Zumba event on Feb. 10. The event was packed with great Zumba-goers, a lot of tightness, a lot of brightness, and a lot of fun. The students will be hosting a second Zumba event on March 10 at 10 a.m. in PE 110. The event is $10 and
the theme is the ‘80s. Prizes will be awarded for best dressed, most energy, and best moves. Once in El Salvador, the FDOC students will join a professional medical team that includes doctors, dentists, medical laboratory technologists, professional students, a pharmacist, an epidemiologist, an x-ray technologist, an ultrasound technologist, and the FDOC director of habitat and sustainability. The students’ roles in El Salvador will include health education and constructing eco-stoves. The students will also shadow physicians, dentists, and other members of the medical team. Projects completed last year by FDOC include a presentation about oral hygiene for kids – after which the team handed out toothbrushes, toothpaste, and Barbie dolls – and daily clinics that treated about 250 patients a day. FDOC is based in Victoria, BC and was created by Dr. Ben Cavilla, an alumnus of the U of L. FDOC is a non-profit and non-governmental organization, and organizes medical aid trips to Haiti, Nicaragua, and El Salvador.
If you spent innumerable hours of childhood, as I did, absorbed by pixilated shapes re-arranging on a screen – in other words, playing video games – then you probably know that this month the Museum of Modern Art (MoMA) is opening a permanent exhibition dedicated to video games. The exhibit is part of the MoMA’s architecture and design department, and is curated by Paola Antonelli. Last year, in November, Antonelli released a blog post announcing the permanent collection and revealing the first 14 games in the collection, which are “the seedbed for an initial wish list of about 40 to be acquired in the near future, as well as for a new category of artworks in MoMA’s collection that we hope will grow in the future.” The 14 games are Pac-Man (1980), Tetris (1984), Another World (1991), Myst (1993), SimCity 2000 (1994), Vib-Ribbon (1999), The Sims (2000), Katamari Damacy (2004), EVE Online
(2003), Dwarf Fortress (2006), Portal (2007), flOw (2006), Passage (2008), and Canabalt (2009). The MoMA has been talking with scholars, critics, historians, and digital conservation and legal experts over the two years leading up to this launch to consider, along with the issues surrounding the acquisition and conservation of video games, the criteria of acceptance for video games into the collection. The MoMA has divided its considerations into four main categories, which reflect the traits that the MoMA feels define the design of video games. These four categories are as follows: behaviour, which is how game design encourages or shapes player behaviour; aesthetics, which takes into consideration how a video game has pushed the technological limitations of its time to find a unique form of visual expression; space, which is the digital space players interact with; and
time, which considers the length of time a video game requires to be experienced, as well as games that blend time into their experience. Are video games art? This question floats perennially around the internet, surfacing in forums dedicated to video games and exploding in the comments section of online news stories regarding video games. The inclusion of video games in the MoMA might seem to offer a definitive answer to this question, but, though Antonelli offers her opinion on the matter, I don’t feel this exhibit will end the debate. “Are video games art? They sure are, but they are also design, and a design approach is what we chose for this new foray into this universe.” The exhibit is placing its focus on the design of video games, and will, it seems, leave a defence of video games for someone else to tackle.
March 7, 2013 • 09
Personally, the most significant experience I’ve ever had through a video game occurred while playing The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask. If your immediate reaction isn’t a sudden recognition of your disinterest in video games, then more likely your reaction is something along the lines of “what about Final Fantasy VII?” or “Ocarina of Time was better.” If I can’t convince you that Majora’s Mask has provided one of the most powerful moments in video game history, then I at least hope to share with you how it has to me. If you’re unaware of Majora’s Mask, I highly recommend becoming acquainted with it, even briefly through a quick internet search. You can look up the plot too, if you’re curious. What makes Majora’s Mask interesting for me is its main mechanic, namely, its three-day cycle. Majora’s Mask occurs completely within the same three days, and before the end of the third day when the moon will crash into Termina, the player must travel back to the start of the cycle. Now, this cycle is exact recurrence; uninterrupted, the people and the events occur the same. This adds an interesting level of restriction
to the game. All games, by their nature, have some sort of restriction – the “rules,” if you want to call them that. Normally when we play video games we kind of forget we’re in a world with really strict limitations on our actions, and just get absorbed by its interactivity, but Majora’s Mask is different in that it prominently features the limits it imposes on the player, and even works them into the game. The Kafei and Anju sidequest is perfectly emblematic of Majora’s Mask’s impact, so I’ll focus on it. If you aren’t familiar with this sidequest, a quick internet search will go a long way. This sidequest demonstrates to me a perfect integration of the game’s design with its meaning. Without the limitations that the three-day cycle imposes upon the player, the sidequest just becomes a pretty conventional lovers-reunited story. To put it simply, it’s important that I’m interacting with the story, but it’s equally important, if not more, that my interaction is limited. The final scene demonstrates why the limitation is vitally important. When I played this quest the first time, the scene went something like this:
moments before the moon was about to crash into Termina and kill everyone, I reunite Kafei and Anju, who express their love for each other. Then I play the Song of Time to go back to the first day. That moment stunned me. I invested so much into the lives of these characters. I worked so hard to reunite them against the obstacles that prevented it, but finally the time restriction that the game imposed upon me undid it. I couldn’t both complete the game and do the quest. Now, those of you experienced with the game know that, in fact, the player can actually finish this sidequest and save the world, if you do the sidequest at the end of the game before confronting the Skull Kid. This doesn’t alter my argument. As a player, my interaction informed this quest. I slowly unraveled the mystery surrounding these lovers by picking up vague hints that I discovered by becoming increasingly familiar with the events of the town, due to the repeated three-day cycle. It was the realization that for all my magic masks, equipment, and songs, I was powerless, in that particular moment, to save the lovers and save the world.
Even before we completely sit down, it seems, Dr. David Clearwater poses this question: “I ask this of my students all the time: What percentage of sales in North America do the first-person shooter, third-person shooter, military-themed shooter occupy?” My response to this is 60 per cent. I haven’t been closely monitoring the video game market recently, and so I feel this is a conservative estimate. “Historically, it’s only been around 10 or 12 per cent.” Apparently my overestimation isn’t even the largest. “I’ve had students say 80, 90 per cent. But that’s the mind-share it occupies, not necessarily the sales.” David’s main academic focus is on the relationship between the military and video games, which, according to David, goes back to the very beginning. “Graphics, artificial intelligence – that all comes out of the last 70 years of post-World War II military funding. So, right from the very beginning there was this technological – I don’t know what you’d want to call it – push in these certain directions, and
interestingly that kind of culminated in video games.” This naturally provokes me to ask David what the military’s current relationship with video games looks like. David names a few titles with associations to the military. “Close Combat: First to Fight comes out of the Marines.” I decide to look up this title, so I go to the Close Combat page on the publisher 2K Games’ website. In a box listed as “Game Information” I find these statements: “Developed in conjunction with the US Marine Corps” and “Use true military tactics to defeat enemies.” There really seems to me to be something eerie about working toward a verisimilitude of war. The slogan on the box (“Based on a training tool developed for the United States Marines”) is equally unsettling. Why would I want to be preparing for the military when playing a game? “The U.S. military has an interest in aiding video game developers because they see that as a natural extension of their public relations.”
Hearing David speak, I realize how ignorant I was about the parentage of video games, and the relationship they maintain with the military. I reflect how, growing up with them, I took video games for granted. From this perspective it’s easy to view video games pessimistically, but I decide to put the question to David; can video games be art? “I definitely believe video games are capable of being called art,” David says. He sees the aesthetics, the programming, and the game mechanics as being involved in a creative process. “It always comes down to the definition of art, and whose definition is it?” This is to say, those with the power to define control the definition. So who’s opposing video games right now? “It still comes from established artistic communities.” It seems these communities don’t even need to be established for a long time. David identifies Roger Ebert’s statement, “no one in or out of the field has ever been able to cite a game worthy of comparison with the great poets,
filmmakers, novelists and poets.” This is a harsh judgment of video games, and Roger Ebert doesn’t seem to think his judgment will change anytime soon. “I don’t care if the characters in Final Fantasy VII have miniscule facial, emotional representations. It’s the interactions with the characters throughout this 20, 40 hours of the game where I get my emotional impact, and that’s often very different. In many ways, I think it’s a misunderstanding of the medium.” I think I would agree with David. The narrative in narrative video games – those with a story arc, I mean – is received differently than, say, the narrative in a film. In a narrative game you gain information determined by which characters and objects you choose to interact with. The overall plot doesn’t change much, but your reception of it is radically different because of that interactive element. Ultimately, it seems David is optimistic about video games as a medium for expression. He thinks what video
March 7, 2013 • 11
games mean will change with the new generations. He points to my generation, the one that grew up on video games, as really carrying on this conversation about video games. David finishes with a modern example. “If you were to call Minecraft art, which I almost think it is, it’s very different from art that’s existed in the past. But that’s part of the progress of technology and artistic thinking and design. I’m just continually astounded at the video game industry, and the medium as a whole.” I get another perspective on video games during my conversation with Professor James Graham. He’s been prolific in his time. He’s held a directorial position within universities and art galleries in Canada, he’s exhibited his art over the course of 28 years nationally and internationally, and he’s currently working on an SSHRC-funded digital humanities project called “The Visionary Cross,” where he is creating a highly-detailed, interactive digital 3D model of a 7th-century Anglo-Saxon cross, located in south-
western Scotland. All this is to say that he’s experienced in his fine arts background. James begins by framing his discussion of video games around the MoMA’s decision to call video games design objects, instead of art objects. “It really is a very historical look at the core of game design.” For James, what would shift the focus of this exhibit from an historical design frame to an artistic frame would be a consideration of games outside that commercial realm, games that challenge assumptions about game design. “It’s a very, very conservative selection. Anybody could open up a book of the history of game design and look at the first 10 years of game production, and that’s basically the top titles that you’d find.” Game design is evidently very important to James. In fact, it’s what he considers the unique expressive aspect of video games. “The French approach was really refreshingly different.” James is referring to a graduate game design program in France, and
what struck him the most was the entrance exam. Entrants had to create an outline of a game design using “a little plate of haute cuisine” as inspiration. “There were three pieces of endive, two asparagus, and a little squiggle of some sauce.” James suggests that one could even design a game where the endive is a spaceship. “That’s one of the great things about game design. You can come into this idea of the magic circle. Within this circle, everything makes sense. You build a system in it, and in theory, it doesn’t even have to relate to the outside world.” What is the magic circle? James explains that it’s a phrase adopted by Eric Zimmerman and Katie Salen in The Rules of Play. The circle has three levels – rules, play, and culture. “It’s the membrane between rules and culture where play happens.” What makes play really powerful is how it mediates between rules and culture. It makes the two malleable. The more I think about it, that seems to me the function of art in general, creating a
What do you think? Are video games capable of being art? What are your favourite video games? Most significant video game moments? Send your responses to firstname.lastname@example.org
space between rules and culture that allows both to change. Perhaps it’s this optimistic view of a video game’s potential that frustrates James. He sees the video game industry right now to be made up of engineers, not artists. “The main money comes from something that’s threatening, and you have very limited choices and you have to make decisions quickly and follow through on them. That’s not a metaphor on any level for life.” It’s a formula, and it reduces life down into a series of threats and obstacles to overcome. I might argue that is one metaphor for life, but certainly not a charitable one. “[A game] gets to be artistic when it represents the complexity of philosophical questions you have in life.” To finish our conversation, I ask for James’ thoughts on Braid, a video game I admire. He sees some good in this title, but feels it serves to highlight how young the medium is. “It is innovative, but it also points out just how far we have to go in terms of games.”
Why Breaking Bad is the greatest show of all time [Warning: spoiler alert] Matt Gal
Entertainment Writer “All hail the king.” So read the promotional posters for part one of Breaking Bad's fifth and final season (the second part will air July 2013), which, barring a disaster, will go down as the king of kings. Through five glorious seasons, Breaking Bad has deftly mixed humour, action, suspense, morbidity, and tenderness into a recipe as addictive and as fragile as the blue-meth the show's protagonists produce. I am of course referring to Walter White and Jesse Pinkman – the show's stars, portrayed with mesmerizing perfection by Bryan Cranston and Aaron Paul. To those unfamiliar with the show's premise, it chronicles the life of the downtrodden genius Walter White, whose intelligence is surpassed only by the disappointing futility of his life. On his 50th birthday, Walter is diagnosed with terminal lung cancer. Fed up with the fate life has dealt him, Walter decides to locate a former student, Jesse Pinkman, and the two begin cooking meth, Jesse motivated by personal wealth, and Walt motivated to provide financial security for his family. This plot, however, is merely the hook to a much more existential story: the erosion of morality, the allure of power, and the price of hubris. Breaking Bad's greatness is in its
corruptibility, in its daringness to mould and re-mould every character, and like the rusting of a vehicle, Breaking Bad's evolution is a slow but inevitable burn. Television, done correctly, allows the creator of a show to develop a story and characters whose lives occur over years – Lost, The Wire, and Six Feet Under – thus, characters can change in ways we couldn’t imagine at first. In Breaking Bad, the degenerate junkie becomes the show’s moral centre, the broken and loving father its pragmatic monster, and the macho DEA agent its frail heart. The first image of Walter in Breaking Bad is of a sickly, pitiful man, gauntly walking on an exercise machine in the dark, while the camera pans over a Nobel Prize for contributions in chemistry. Later, Walt is heartbreakingly ridiculed while washing one of his student’s cars – a job he takes to supplement his teaching income. It's one of many early scenes where the writers build pity for Walt, making his decisions understandable, perhaps even noble. These scenes add to the emotional complexity of later seasons, where we struggle to decide if we still pity Walt, or revile him. A recent scene shows Walt, apprehensive, staring out a window, as a series of prison murders occur on his orders. Vince
Gilligan, the show’s creator, builds Walt so carefully and subtly throughout five seasons, that we believe that the man who began cooking meth to save his family is the same man who murders for self-preservation. Breaking Bad never forgets that it’s a story told through visual medium. It’s in its harrowing visual style that much of its beauty and perfection lay. In season two, the bike of a young boy, murdered because he witnessed Walt and Jesse's train heist, is broken down and melted in acid, a reminder of the bodies the duo disposed of in the first season. In the show’s finest episode, “Crawl Space,” Walt cackles in agony as he realizes that the person he works for will murder his entire family, and the money he hoped would protect them is gone. If you watch only one minute of Breaking Bad, make it the final minute of “Crawl Space.” It’s a masters-class in tension, plotting, and acting. These scenes make Breaking Bad appear nihilistic or despairing, but that’s too reductive and dismisses the genius of the show: momentum. Most of the scenes described above are from the show’s later seasons. Earlier seasons are more innocent and humorous: Walt and Jesse are ill-equipped for the drug-trade and its violence. But as the show’s characters
evolve, so does the darkness. Gilligan's world is one with real consequences, and integration into the criminal underworld takes its toll on physical and emotional well-being. Jesse asks Walt, “Are we in the money business or the meth business?” He realizes that they have all the money they could ever want, and they can stop cooking meth. Walt responds, “Neither. I'm in the empire business.” Jesse realizes that he never wanted to hurt anyone; he just wanted to make some money. Walt realizes that his decisions may have had nothing to do with money, and everything to do with power. These ruminative scenes, viewed in hindsight, create emotional complexity that few shows reach. Was Walt’s darkness always inside him, or was it manufactured by his dire situation? Does Jesse’s kind heart atone for the things he does? Will Hank be made whole if he catches the elusive Heisenberg? These questions have not been, and likely will never be, answered definitively. Breaking Bad transcends the small screen; it will undeniably echo throughout the rest of television history. You just have to open the door and let it in.
March 7, 2013 • 13
Liven up your night
take in some
Photo courtesy of James Oldenburg
Entertainment Editor While partaking in some good food and good jazz at the Streatside Eatery on March 2, I was delighted to have the opportunity to sit down with musicians James Oldenburg and Paul Holden for an impromptu interview. The pair amiably allowed me to intervene with their break for a quick conversation about jazz and HBO3. “We’re two thirds of a jazz trio. We also have a drummer [Brad Brower], and collectively we’re called HBO3,” says Holden. And at the Streatside that night, with Oldenburg on the jazz guitar and Holden on the upright bass, the two musicians made a great pair; clearly this was not their first rodeo. According to Holden, the Streatside has been a regular venue for them for about a year and a half. They first started playing at the Streatside following the summer jazz fest that is “in the third week of June,” says Oldenburg, “there’s five or six restaurants that are venues,” with the Streatside of course being one of them. The group also plays private functions, and they play regularly at the Trianon Wine Bar. “It’s a nice
place to hang, catch some jazz,” says Oldenburg. While the Streatside is (by nature of it being a restaurant) a place where people look for a food experience rather than a musical experience, the Trianon Wine Bar is more of a jazz hub for HBO3, where they simply play jazz as opposed to dinner jazz. “For me I’d say it’s the Trianon,” says Oldenburg, with Holden agreeing, when I asked about favourite jazz venues. “We just love to play though,” continues Oldenburg, “especially with jazz, you’re always exploring. You never play the same thing twice, even though it may be the same song, so we have a good time playing, and we’re kind of used to people checking in and out.” Although dinner jazz at the Streatside may sometimes fall into background music, “they’re catching on with the jazz,” says Oldenburg; people have come in and asked specifically about jazz night. And there’s good reason for asking to hear the HBO3 members’ jazz. It was a very neat experience to sit down to some jazz at the Streatside.
The atmosphere had a comfortable ambiance as Oldenburg and Holden crafted the melodies that wafted through the restaurant. While people ate, drank, conversed, and listened to the surrounding jazz, Holden and Oldenburg were two musicians absorbed in their music. Their fingers plucked at their instruments’ strings with an intricate energy as their feet and heads subtly bopped in motion with the tempo of the music. “Do you ever throw in improv in your music, on a whim?” I ask. “That element is there in different capacities,” responded Holden, “you play a tune at the beginning that includes a melody, and then the tune gets opened up.” “If you sing a melody aloud the first time, and then it goes into improv, you can sing that melody throughout the song. The song is actually not changed; it’s just the improv around it,” adds Oldenburg. This complicated dance between form, melody, and improv surely requires intricate technical skill, and an ability to embrace the fine lines that separate song structure and full
out improv, skills that Oldenburg and Holden clearly demonstrate as they livened the restaurant with their flow of jazz. You can’t miss them. You wouldn’t want to miss them. Here’s where HBO3 collectively, as well as its individual members in some cases, will be this month: This Friday and Saturday (March 8 and 9), Oldenburg will be playing at the Mocha Cabana from 6 to 9 p.m. On Wednesday, March 13, HBO3 will host Jazz Jam at the Slice starting at 9:30 p.m. On Friday, March 15, HBO3 will be playing at the Trianon Wine Bar for Jazz Happy Hour from 5 to 7:30 p.m., and later they’ll be playing and singing at the Mix by Ric’s from 8 to 11 p.m.; this time solo, Oldenburg will also be playing at the Mix by Ric’s from 7 to 10 p.m. And to finish off the month, HBO3 will join Furious D and Hippodrome for a show at the Slice on March 29. I’ll leave you to your music – enjoy.
An evening with the guise: professional bull riding, and why I converted to fandom Leyland Bradley
Entertainment Contributor I’m going to be honest; as a native Nova Scotian, I roll my eyes at the thought of enthusiasm for cowboy-related anything. The Calgary Stampede gets a giant thumbs-down from me; why is everyone suddenly a cowboy at that time of year? The cowboy hats come out of the closet, and the sea of white tank tops layered with plaid shirts from Bluenotes is visible as far as the eye can see. The studded back pockets on women’s jeans don’t even make any sense – how can someone sit on their horse with pocket bling? It must hurt their ass. Totally impractical. But moving on – the PBR. My partner in crime and I arrive at the Enmax, and the place is relatively empty. It’s an hour until show time. The place smells a bit like a farm – I like it, I think. Right away, I notice the whole stage area looks much different than what I’m used to seeing at the Enmax Centre. The floor is coated with thick
dirt, barricaded by tall metal fences. It all looks so legitimate. It only dawns on me then that I will literally be witnessing grown men ride giant animals. Men will be thrown off and hit the ground, hard. Again and again. For thousands of dollars. I suddenly get excited, although I’m slightly perturbed. This is going to be very fun. Before my patience started to run thin for the non-stop country music, the show starts. The lights go off. An omniscient voice instructs patrons to grab their drinks and get to their seats, through a deafening level of whooping and hollering. My partner and I try to get closer to the action. We move from our sky-high media seats to the floor. The whole buildup is treated like a rock concert. Between the pyrotechnics and the loud music, the show is synonymous with hype. The riders are
introduced – most are Canadian or American. The best of the best are introduced last. They’re impressive for starting their careers so young; some of these men began riding bulls at 17 years old. Some women in the audience go nuts for these men at this point. It’s all hilarious. The riders are wearing hockey helmets and Kevlar vests. What the hell? I know this is an extreme sport – is that what they’re talking about? And who is going to shoot these men? The sign by the ticket booth said no weapons. I find myself smiling the entire show, and yelling things like, “Oh man, buddy better watch out!” and “Haha, that bull’s name is Extra Mustard!” PETA would not condone anything. The bulls are annoyed of course, and some are more difficult than others to encourage back into the pen. I can’t help but feel bad for them, especially
when the guy responsible for wrangling them back into the pen throws the rope right in their bull face. The bulls are kind of cute, really. They blink really slow and drool a lot. I’ve been told that bull riding is less harmful to the animal in comparison to other rodeo events. Not sure if it’s true, but it is interesting nonetheless. The show winds down, and people start leaving early to beat the traffic. I also ditch my seat to get to my car, only to regret it. I wonder what the finale would have looked like – probably over the top and awesome (*sigh*). I became a convert for a few reasons: one, it’s highly entertaining, and two, it’s culturally significant. I would definitely go to another bull riding. I’ll remember to bring my Kevlar.
March 7, 2013 • 15
The w rld is my classroom
Teaching abroad post-graduation is becoming more and more popular. It can be hard to find resources that effectively discuss what to expect both in the teaching position and in a new cultural context. This is where Happy Time Go Fast comes in; the book relates the experiences of English teacher and author Wes Weston, and is an excellent resource and guide for aspiring teachers. His work experience reflects a unique and diverse teaching career. He has taught university students in South Korea, high school students in rural Namibia, and recently worked with at-risk children at an orphanage in the Dominican Republic. He currently teaches adults in Berkeley, California. English is currently the world’s most widely-used second language. According to estimates by the British Council, about 750 million people speak English as a foreign language. It’s also believed that over a billion people are currently learning English worldwide. Countries and empires will not conquer the world, but the English language just might. So what other results have spawned from the proliferation of English study? For starters, it has generated a growing demand for teachers, thus spinning a language vortex that ensnares people from all walks of life. It caught me nearly eight years ago, and has spit me out in obscure locations such as South Korea, Namibia, the Dominican Republic, and Berkeley, California. I can honestly say I have no regrets, and if I could do it all over again, I wouldn’t change a thing. And to me, that’s the true benchmark of success. Truth be told, I was an unlikely candidate to become an ESL (English as a Second Language) teacher. I had no experience working with children, the thought of public speaking made me cringe with anxiety, and English was a subject I despised as a child. These qualities became evident in the classroom when my teaching misadventures began. Being a newbie to the
ESL profession, I was just as susceptible to making mistakes as the students. In the first few months of teaching, I made numerous blunders. I showered the students with candy to win their affection, I flipped over a desk one day to regain control of a rebellious class, and I even called a kid ugly one time after he spouted off at me. Then, when the last bell rang and kids went home, I felt mentally exhausted and wanted to collapse. To put it bluntly, in the beginning, I really sucked as an educator. But I stuck with it. Ironically, even though I was the teacher, often I was the one who’d end up learning a lesson. In due time, my teacher training wheels came off and I was able to ride smoothly through each lesson. Most importantly, I got the students marching to my beat. I fine-tuned my ability to manage the classroom, handle discipline, and motivate students to work hard. I slowly began to realize that teaching is a marathon, not a sprint, and wouldn’t feel exhausted at the end of each day. The end result – students were actually learning, and it made me feel like a teacher. I truly believe that teaching, in any capacity, is a noble profession. And what started out as a way to subsidize an adventurous life overseas slowly became a passion. After a while, I sought to challenge myself in new learning environments, as well as work with students of all ages and different backgrounds. As the profession took me across three different continents and allowed me to visit over 20 countries, I was able to achieve many of my educational goals. My experiences teaching abroad have taught me invaluable lessons, and I only hope that my students have learned as much from me as I’ve learned from them. Teaching has shown me a world that many people don’t get to see and has helped me appreciate the beauty of diversity and belief. It has also taught me that perhaps one person can’t change the world, but the world can certainly change one person.
Photos courtesy of Wes Weston
March 7, 2013 â€˘ 18
1. Jetty 5. A bed on a ship 10. Spar 14. Lasso 15. A drama set to music 16. Carve in stone 17. Ear-related 18. Mediator 20. Device 22. Preordain 23. Citrus drink 24. French school 25. Unfortunate 32. Girlfriend (Spanish) 33. Angers 34. Clothe 37. Rend 38. Assail 39. Early 20th-century art movement 40. French for "Summer" 41. Objectives 42. Poison
43. Unworthy 45. Sand bar 49. Caviar 50. Deluge 53. Walks unsteadily 57. Unmerited 59. Found in some lotions 60. Encounter 61. A river through Paris 62. Small island 63. Combustible pile 64. Canvas shelters 65. Scallion
1. A formal high school dance 2. Greek letter 3. Sweeping story 4. Reload 5. Hood 6. Type of sword 7. Regulation (abbrev.) 8. Stepped 9. Despise 10. Substantial 11. Loft 12. British biscuit 13. Half of six 19. Small islands 21. Bright thought 25. Unusual 26. Send forth 27. Donate 28. Step 29. Passageway 30. Consecrate 31. Permit 34. Cab 35. Norse god 36. Mob 38. French for "Good" 39. Fit together
And please vote yes in the Meliorist referendum...
tightly 41. Throats (archaic) 42. Gait faster than a walk 44. Wears away 45. The base part of a tree 46. Product of bees 47. Law and _____ 48. Mountain crest 51. Where a bird lives 52. Tall woody plant 53. Canvas dwelling 54. If not 55. Part in a play 56. Search 58. French for "Wine"
March 7, 2013 • 19
Our truth and effort: Students are not a captive audience Kelti Boissonneault Editor-in-Chief
It has recently been brought to my attention the unusually rant-like nature of some lectures this semester in some classes. I’m certainly not implying that all classes are this way, but seasoned students in their fourth or fifth years have indicated that some of the lectures they have been receiving in various classes have taken on a different tone than they had previously been exposed to. Without going into detail about any one particular instance, I will say that some students are finding the lessons of some teachers to be quite the soap-box preaching instead of actual instructional or educational conversation. This is highlighted by (in some cases) the extreme nature of the topics being covered and (again, in some cases) the restriction of comment from students on the subject matter. I have two issues with this. The first issue is that, while I appreciate that in academia students are there to learn and professors are there to teach, one should not utilize class time to go on monotonous rants. Information should be given in a clear and concise way, presented as objectively as possible, and students should be (ideally) encouraged to debate points with each other and the professor on the learned subject matter. The best courses I ever attended in university, particularly at higher levels, allowed for multiple debates in settings where ideas were tossed around and opinions were freely given and minds changed. I have been of the opinion that the best education received at university doesn’t necessarily come from the subject matter of the courses itself (as interesting as it may be), but from learning to critically think about what you, as a student/consumer, are being told and be able to distinguish the mounds of bullshit from the true gems of knowledge. The second issue I have with hearing about these situations (since none of these have occurred to me recently, although I do remember some instances from my earlier undergrad days) is the apparent restriction on feedback from students — even
cases where students’ comments were blatantly ignored, or their request to speak (indicated with a raised hand) was denied entirely. This is not only an ineffective teaching method, it’s just downright rude in the world of academia. As a student I would hope that the courses I am paying thousands of dollars for would provide me a theatre in which to learn, not merely be taught at. By not acknowledging differing opinions on a subject matter the professor is cheating the class out of another perspective, and themselves out of the practice of defending their viewpoints or research. These patterns of behaviour pop up from time to time and I appreciate that they are not the hard and fast rule of this university’s culture, but the fact that they happen at all worries me. Some of the best education I have received at this institution came from classes where the professor literally acted as a moderator, and the students were allowed to hash out their own perspectives (and get into heated debates about them) on the material being consumed. To have a teacher talk at me for a 50-minute class would be hell. To be denied the ability to raise a point or to disagree with a professor is simply ludicrous. If this university wants any chance at sustaining a top-tier educational reputation, the students must be given the opportunity to critique, to think, and overall to learn.
Liz Gleadle One powerful reason to keep watching track and field Travis Robinson Sports Editor
In high school athletics, six metres can be the difference between a first place and second place finish in any given field event. At the world class level, however, six metres is the difference that separates the best javelin athletes in the world from those in the variable pack of up-and-comers. At the 2012 London Olympics, Vancouver-born, Lethbridge-based javelin thrower Liz Gleadle found herself in such a situation. Having reached the final of the women’s javelin throw, Gleadle had a brief encounter with the world record holder and eventual Olympic champion in the women’s javelin event, Czech athlete Barbora Spotakova. “She started talking to me,” reminisces Gleadle. “When I was walking, I was taking my time; I was probably 10 metres behind everybody, just getting further and further back, and she comes back, and she’s like ‘Why are you walking so slow?’ She’s bouncing around, she’s super happy.” Spotakova has the ability to launch a javelin over 70 metres, something very few women on the planet have ever been able to do. While Gleadle has only managed 60 metres, she realizes that a podium finish would consist of an achievable half dozen metres on her personal best. “It’s going to take a lot of reps, it’s going to take a lot of time, but that’s what track and field is,” says Liz. Tall and rangy, Liz has the potential to reach an international podium. She
hopes to achieve such form under the guidance of new coach Larry Steinke, who is a legend himself in the international throwing circuits. “I moved [to Lethbridge] so I could train with him,” says Gleadle. “He has put so much work into throwing; it is absolutely incredible how much he knows and how much he really cares about his athletes and really wants them to do well.” Liz researched her new coach before moving to Lethbridge, and found him to be an athlete’s coach. “He’s an amazing athlete… he’s played basketball, he’s played volleyball, he’s done track and field.” Having a coach who knows what it means to be an athlete bolsters Liz’s confidence. “I trust him completely.” This combination of athlete and coach is crucial to building both the technique and proficiency required to compete on a consistent basis at the international level. Although Gleadle has always had the natural ability and size to throw the javelin, it took a cerebral coach like Larry Steinke to harness that raw power. In regards to her inherent power, Gleadle admits that it was one particular sport that helped developed it. “I was a fast pitch rep pitcher for 10 years. It was the lower body that was really similar to javelin.” Gleadle came from a diverse athletics background, but says she excelled at throwing. “My parents threw me in everything. I was a good pitcher, but I was never the greatest at anything
else.” Liz became a proficient multi-sport athlete because of her diverse athletic background, but upon picking up the javelin realized that she had something special. In her teenage years, Liz was a high school provincial champion in javelin before being selected to the Canadian junior national team and competing at both the World Youth and World Junior Championships. She managed a surprising fifth place finish at the World Youths in Morocco in 2005 and came to realize that her skills were something special indeed. Nearly 10 years later, Gleadle is the Canadian national record holder in javelin and a serious threat to the Eastern European stranglehold on the sport. At only 24, Gleadle is a youngster in a sport where athletes can compete into their late 30s, “if you can have a strong body, and you can maintain it, and you have good technique, and you’re careful,” says Gleadle. Barring some freakish injury (and there have been a few, including a broken hammer wire bruising her leg from waist to knee last year), Gleadle hopes to compete and maintain her level of competition well into what some would call the twilight of athletic careers. Making it through this hectic 2013 season, however, may be a challenge in itself. “I just got into a meet in Japan in May,” says Gleadle. “They’re called Diamond League meets, and there is a bunch of them. Now that I’ve made an Olympic final, I don’t need as much pull to get into
javelin meets.” Gleadle will also be competing in Arizona and Lethbridge in preparation for that big meet in Japan. If she excels at the Diamond League meet, the 2013 World Track and Field Championships may await her in Moscow. This biennial showcase of track and field, which features the same field as an Olympics, hinges on her performance in those preparation meets. “It’s your job. If you don’t perform, people aren’t going to want you there,” says Liz in reference to the Worlds. Although Liz enters track meets to compete, she admits that there are perks to just being in the same competition as the biggest stars in the sport. “I was 20 metres away from Usain Bolt, watching him run his 200 metre final,” says Gleadle in reference to her London experience. “I lined myself up with the finish line.” While being awestruck by the ability of a once in a lifetime athlete like Bolt is to be expected, Liz hopes to one day be that person everyone is watching at the Olympics. “You win the Olympics, and the rest of your life is set,” says Gleadle. “I’d rather actually have to work for it and get involved with stuff than just make a bunch of money [on the Diamond League circuit].” With the physicality and ability Gleadle possesses, combined with her coaching and training program, there is no doubt that this powerful young woman is on her way to reaching that monolithic Olympic podium.
March 7, 2013 • 21
Not sure if you’re a boy or a girl
the styles of
David Bowie Travis Robinson Lifestyle Editor
In celebration of David Bowie’s first studio release in 10 years, I have compiled a list of what I believe are Bowie’s most iconic looks. At once both stylish and daring, the garish and thespian creations of Bowie have been toned down over the years, but still remain hallmarks in the fashions of pop music. With his alter egos and his gender blurring, Bowie was a true fashion icon before rock stars could be called stylish. Bowie, I salute you.
5 197 Bowie experimented with soul and funk music on his Young Americans record. His style during this brief period was exemplified on the Dick Cavett Show, where Bowie wore a simple brown suit accessorised by his acoustic guitar. The music off of Young Americans was so full of character and funk that Bowie toned down his look so as not to interfere.
7 196 When Bowie was still the fresh-faced Dave Jones, he took to rocking bowl cuts and sweaters that the Beatles had made iconic a half decade before. Although generic, there was something about Bowie (and his permanently dilated pupil) that made him protrude from the crowd of wannabe rock stars.
Bowie’s next alter ego came in the form of a debonair English gentleman named the Thin White Duke. Sporting a waistcoat, billowing white shirt, and slicked back blonde hair, this cocaine-fuelled alias was created by Bowie for the album Station to Station and the film The Man Who Fell to Earth. Nurturing himself on red peppers, milk, and astronomic amounts of blow, the Duke was short lived but ultimately iconic.
9 2 196 197 Upon meeting and striking up a friendship with fellow glam rocker Marc Bolan, Bowie was inspired to change his look, and his fashions to match his fellows in the glitz department. Bowie created what would be his most iconic alter ego, Ziggy Stardust, and fashioned himself in androgynous rags covered in glitter and accessorized with a shockingly red mullet hairstyle. The glam rock movement spawned a plethora of poseurs; even Halloween costumes have been replicated from this look. For Bowie, however, it was his work attire. He always dressed as if he were headlining.
During the recording of the Berlin trilogy, Bowie diversified his look. The ‘70s were wrapping up, and so was Bowie’s commercial success. With this, he tackled a simpler look and reverted back to his original hair colour for the first time in some 10 years. Simple mono-coloured clothing became wardrobe staples for Bowie on his Eastern Bloc exile.
3 974 7 9 1 1 It was during this time that Bowie heightened his androgyny and made his look all the more ostentatious. During the Aladdin Zane period, Bowie painted a multi-coloured lightning bolt across his face; upon recording the 1984-inspired Diamond Dogs, Bowie donned his “Pirate Jack” outfit (complete with eye patch) and sung the tale of a young rebel whose confused mother couldn’t tell “if you’re a boy or a girl.” The only thing that remained consistent over this time period was Bowie’s red mullet.
Bowie entered the 1980s with the recording of Scary Monsters and a visit back to his old friend Major Tom. Bowie rocked a jester’s garb in the music video for “Ashes to Ashes.” He hit a new commercial peak with the release of 1983’s Let’s Dance, and donned a canary yellow suit and matching hair for the subsequent Serious Moonlight Tour. This yellow on yellow outfit would be the last iconic look of Bowie’s career. God bless you, Mr. Bowie.
Top 5 places
to catch 20 winks on campus
Lifestyle Contributor This week, depending on the student, marks either the beginning or end of midterm exams. Unfortunately there is probably one thing that is low on the priority list for most university students… sleep. Because of this, I am here to help! I present you with the top five places on campus to grab some shut eye:
space’s combination of big, plushy couches and large windows that provide great natural light makes it the perfect atmosphere where you may find yourself unable to stay awake for one more second.
Pool viewing area:
If you are down in U Hall and do not feel like making the long trek to the SU building to grab some shut eye, the big black chairs (located as you are walking out of CJ’s eating area) make a good choice. The only downside is that this is a high traffic area, so a picture of you snoring with your mouth open may just find its way onto Facebook…
Popular for both studying and napping, the pool’s viewing area provides the relaxing sound of splashing water, as well as a perfect balance between coziness and humidity. However… beware of what time you choose to grab some shut eye. Lunch time? You will be surrounded by a load of chatty university students who will finally find themselves awake as their caffeine will have just kicked in. You may also be just about to drift off, then begin to have a dream regarding a very intimidating army drill sergeant… only to wake up and discover it is actually just the aerobics instructor.
Tucked away at the back of the cafeteria is Galileo’s Lounge. This
Big comfy chairs beside CJ’s:
Long benches outside the University Theatre:
Located one floor below the atrium, the long benches outside the University Theatre and the David Spinks Theatre are a perfect place to stretch out. With the exception of class changes, this area does not often contain much traffic and excessive noise, so your drooling and snoring may go unnoticed.
If you are looking for a place to grab some shut eye as well as get a little studying done, this is the place for you. With reasonable hours, this building has a more modern look and feel (especially in comparison to U Hall). As well, there is a Starbucks located inside Markin Hall that is open Monday to Friday, 7:30 a.m. to 3:30 p.m.! Just in case your nap wasn’t enough to restore your energy, you can grab yourself a jolt of caffeine.
March 7, 2013 • 23
Do a little dance, make a lotta love (part 2)
Kelti Boissonneault Editor-in-Chief
Last week we explored the world of the female striptease. Since I truly believe in equality in the bedroom, this week will focus on giving guys pointers for the same act. Since I’m not a guy, I figured the best way to begin this article was by doing research — so, I googled male strippers! After watching about 15 minutes of strictly educational videos, I feel ready to write this article. Guys: confidence is key - and shake that gorgeous tush! Most guys aren’t totally confident dancers so many of you may think a striptease is a little out of your comfort zone. The idea of the striptease is usually contextualized as females seductively removing their clothing, but it can work for guys too! A lot of guys have the same hang-ups on getting naked that girls do and they can feel a lot of pressure about their body image as well, but that shouldn’t ever stop you from having a blast with your partner. Here are some basic how-to steps for a male striptease that will get their partner’s heart racing! Like the girls’ article last week, flexibility doesn’t really come into play in a striptease. If you are limber enough to have sex, you can dance a little too! It’s just about confidence so make sure you get comfortable and get hyped. The look of amazement (and carnal hunger) in your partner’s eyes will be so worth it. Step 1: Set the mood with some lighting and some music. Step 2: If your plans involve a
costume change, now is the time: excuse yourself and go make the necessary changes to your wardrobe. Planning ahead is a good idea; lay out your chosen attire in another room so you aren’t scrambling at the last minute. For guys, think accessories. Traditionally your everyday wardrobe isn’t as complex or doesn’t involve as many pieces as a woman’s, so undressing is usually a pretty quick affair. The point of the striptease is to draw it out — so include things like a hat, a tie, and a belt in your ensemble for more items to seductively remove. You could also consider a collared shirt (don’t tuck it in) and a suit-vest (no jacket, you’ll look too done-up). Step 3: Make a grand entrance! If your ensemble does involve a collared shirt and a suit-vest, enter with your hat tilted forward and your jacket over one shoulder (okay, go ahead, show off the moonwalk, this is totally okay!). Toss your jacket aside and snap your head up, smile at your partner — you’re ready to go. Move slowly, find the rhythm of the music, and don’t forget to keep smiling. Enjoy what you’re doing; this is an once-in-a-lifetime show for your partner and they are certainly loving it. Use the furniture in the room as props for you to dance around. Move slowly, shake your hips, and flex every long muscle in your body (even if you don’t have Magic Mike’s bod) to accentuate your form — they will love it. Step 4: Remove clothing piece by precious piece. Take your time and think about each article of clothing as you remove it. If you are wearing a
collared shirt (guys, wear this, obviously) undo the wrist cuff buttons and then slowly undo the front buttons starting at the top. Try removing the shirt before you remove the tie — flip the collar up and take it off with the tie (loosened) still around your neck. That tie could come in handy in a few minutes and you don’t want to have to go looking for it on the floor. Remove your pants/underwear last and please — make sure you aren’t wearing socks up to your knees. When you undo your fly, thrust your hips towards your waiting partner, and undo the button. Then swivel your hips as you slowly unzip the fly — it will drive them wild. Step 5: The drive-them-wild finale — when the song ends, look at your partner. Smile at their hungry expression and go join them on the bed. If you finish on the bed, lean in for a kiss, the intimacy seals the deal and the best part is they don’t even have to rip your clothes off. Tips to troubleshoot: Don’t hesitate! While getting dressed, pump yourself up for the activity. If there’s a mirror, find five things you think are super-hot about you in the moment before you go out. It’s a little confidence-booster. If you get shy at any point during the tease, end it early, or just go with it. Take a breath, regain your confidence, smile, and keep going. It’s a private performance and your audience will love every minute of it. Plan clothing removal — this sounds like a no-brainer; we get dressed and undressed every day. But adding in
the watchful stare, the sensual moveBarry White ment, the constant re-balancing can actually make the act of removing some articles of clothing more difficult. Don’t pull shirts up over your head unless you are steady. Sit down to remove pants, shorts, or underwear. Make sure you kick discarded clothes out of the way, or purposefully drop them into a place you won’t be stepping in a second as you try to twirl. You are creating tripping hazards as you go, so watch out! One of the biggest things to remember is that your partner is having a good time watching you, but you should also be having a good time teasing them! Explore your nudity in front of them and it will drive them wild. For those with male partners: men are typically voyeurs, they get turned on by what they are seeing, so give them a show. Play with yourself and in general enjoy your own naked sensuality while you’re out of reach. They’ll get their turn when you are done dancing!
** Submit your TLFs at www.themeliorist.ca. All TLFs must be submitted via a valid uleth e-mail account. Keep in mind that libelous or offensive TLFs may be edited or omitted. The TLFs do not reﬂect the view or opinions of The Meliorist Publishing Society.
WHICH KELSEY W… there might be a few……. IME Students Present: CUISINE4ACAUSE on March 7th, go for dinner between 5 and 10pm at Spring Rolls, Streatside Eatery or Two Guys and a Pizza Place. Support the MS Society!!! The Lethbridge Alberta Motion Picture Showcase (LAMPS) is looking for short film submissions to show off at the Movie Mill in April! Go to lampsfest.ca for more info The Meliorist is now selling t-shirts in the bookstore! Only $15 dollars. Help support your independent student newspaper... please. To the cute blonde guy in witch hunts: I’m not confessing to being a witch but ooh ee ooh haha ting tang walla walla bing bang, ooh ee ooh haha ting tang walla walla bing bang! Have you guys seen that show the wire? CUSINE4ACAUSE; March 7th go out and grab some eats at Streatside Eatery, Two Guys and a Pizza Place or Spring Rolls and 100% of the profits from 5-10 go to the MS Society!!! Hey, short haired girl with wishful thinking I didn’t recive your previous
message in time, how about we meet up on march 12th at noon at the Tim’s on campus. Guy with glasses. 6 Months, mon amour. And happy birthday, too. (: Dear blonde girl, in polkadot shirt in the library on Wednesday night. You are very pretty. That is all. To the sir with the name that gives life color. Don’t worry, purple may have bad connotations. But one day, you’ll get your Crown. You brighten my day. And sometimes nights. Peace. I really enjoy this time of year when every available wall space on campus is covered in tacky posters with shitty/irrelevant memes on them. Hungry? Head out on March 7th between 5 and 10pm to Streatside Eatery, Spring Rolls or Two Guys and a Pizza Place and 100% of food profits go to the MS Society of Lethbridge! I am this man you speak of… The one they call jigglefest2 ..”…\………. _.·´ ….\…………..( …..\………….\… Wanted: One married couple for free
round-trip vacation to Mars. Preferably a homosexual couple to prevent the possibility of SPACE PREGNANCY *insert spooky ghost noises here* I left my stainless steel thermos in room C 630 on Tuesday, if someone has found it, or given it to security, I would be very thankful! I will happily give the Meliorist $2 when they write some articles that are actually of interest to the general student body. Flying Doctors, Tom Flanagan debacle, David Bowie, Breaking Bad, SU Candidates, Shahbag Protesters at the UofL, Idle No More, Occupy Wall Street, Campus Clubs, and every major election that ever takes place... if you only read the TLFs it is easy to miss these other great sections of the paper. If the Meliorist is written “for the week of Thursday, ” it would be advisable to also distribute it Thursday. You do have weekly readers, you know. To my love bug and the biggest dork in the world. I’m sending you rainbows and butterflies as a reminder of how special you are to me. from the lonely rhino in the cow pasture
Our operating costs have gone
I shall vote in the student elections the day a candidate commits to the spreading of glorious Convergence. Altman be praised! Bingo guy: that’s definitely me. Where and when would you like to meet? – Blonde girl Dear traumatized lesbian, I clip my nails. Sincerely, An adorable butch lesbian. 1) bowtie 2) fishsticks and custard 3) allons-y your butt to galileo’s on March 30! I mean it! Now- RUN! (I’ll be the big blue box) Walk into the Zoo. Three dudes are working. They sat there watching tv for 20 minutes until a waitress came on shift, then sent her to get me. WHO ARE THESE LAZY PIECES OF S***? Don’t get me wrong, it’s management and the kitchen staff that suck at the Zoo. The waitresses there are ALL golden beauties I’ve started thinking of our government as more like an elected dictatorship. Especially after harper’s gov’t started calling itself harper’s gov’t.
PLEASE SUPPORT YOUR CAMPUS NEWSPAPER!
March 7, 2013 • 25
In the past 26 years...
...except the Meliorist fee.
Tall or short. Black or white. Fat, skinny, or in between. Atheist, religious, or just not sure. Straight or crooked- We’re all in this life together, SO LETS LIVE To the guy in MWF 10:00 PSYC 2030 who complains and swears under his breath a lot: if you read your textbook, you wouldn’t be so lost all the time. Kindly shut up and pay attention I would like to congratulate Mr. Tailfeathers for his questioning of Flanagan Re: comment on child pornography. My hat goes off to you, Mr. Tailfeathers. HEY POOL, I CAN HEAR YOUR AQUA-ROBICS MUSIC POURING THROUGH EVERY HOLE IN THE STUDENTS UNION BUILDING. IS PLAYING MUSIC FOR PEOPLE UNDER WATER REALLY THAT NECESSARY?! Dear “A True Blonde” My eyebrows match beautifully and I’m sure that’s part of the reason I get so many compliments. Have you ever gotten a compliment? From STILL A Hotter Blonde To whoever found my car keys near the pool and returned them to the security office- you are a lifesaver.
Thank you so much! Hey Nervous Guy, go say hi to her! Whats the worst that can happen?
Thank you to Rob for being my Mario and saving this stranded Princess Peach from the huge snow storm! <3 Go Vote!
I don’t always go on facebook, but when I do, I like Univeristy of Lethbridge Memes Homosexual/Fetus OP; Hats off to you. You described that paradox perfectly. For that I thank you.
Girl in the green rubber boots; you rock!
Colton Erismann is a babe The Meliorist is hiring for ALL POSITIONS for the next school year. Positions are paid, and you can claim them for class credit. Send your resume and cover letter to: email@example.com
Cutting down on copies directly effects ad revenue. Advertisers pay less when the circulation shrinks. If ad revenue shrinks then fees would have to increase even higher. Plus every extra copy is recycled.
son of a god damn mother fucker.
For every 500 copies the Meliorist cuts from their circulation they only save a total of $75 per week. Those savings are negligible compared to the lost ad revenue.
To all the men at the Jersey party, you all looked dayum fine in those jerseys! wear them everyday please?? CUSINE4ACAUSE: On March 7th, between 5 and 10pm, go grab a bite at Streatside Eatery, Two Guys and a Pizza Place or Spring Rolls. ALL food profits going to the MS Socitey!!
Does anybody else think the one The Fast Track worker sounds like Christoph Waltz?
Don’t forget to vote in the elections. Hey meliorist, if you want to cut down on costs why not stop printing 10x more copies than are consumed? I mean seriously, save trees, save money.
Ryan Raugust sure is attractive
To my Pronghorns jersey model on twitter from last semester, do you not work there anymore? How am I supposed to find you to ask you out? -From the guy buying flashcards.
To my friendly neighborhood atheist, You can make literature say anything you want if you take things out of context. Do some research and try again. God loves you!
Happy Birthday, My Love! Ready for a little surprise?
VOTE YES! For a $2 levy fee increase
I live with the self-proclaimed human glory hole. Any interested applicants should apply within. No experience necessary,anonymous aliases preferred. Do you know what you’re doing? In life…? Or the plan? The plan! Oh . . .Phew!!! (Graduation wouldn’t be so hard if it didn’t involve moving and having to make adult decisions!) Go Vote! I don’t support the $2 increase for the Meliorist. The content seldom interests me and newspaper is a very antiquated and wasteful form of media. Time to enter the 21st century. I think the point is that a $2 increase secures projects that can bring the Meliorist into the 21st century. They still operate off a 20th century budget.
KEN JENNINGS FROM JEOPARDY: WORDS OF WISDOM FROM THE QUIZ MASTER Julia Adolf VP Academic The ULSU is bringing Ken Jennings to the University of Lethbridge on Wednesday, March 20, 2013. Tickets are $2 and can be purchased at the day of the event. Students, professors, staff, and community members are welcome. But who is Ken Jennings? Here is a little bit of background info on the Quiz Master. While working as a software engineer for a Salt Lake City healthcare got the phone call telling him that his contestant audition had been successful and he would appear on a June game of Jeopardy. He spent a ming on familiar Jeopardy subjects
like U.S. presidents, world capitals, and “potent potables.” Much to his surprise, his Jeopardy appearance extended beyond a single game in June: Jennings took advantage of a recent rule change allowing Jeopardy champions to and spent the next six months hogging America’s TV screens. Before losing on the Nov. 30 show because he didn’t know enough about H&R Block, Jennings won 74 games and $2.52 million, both American game show records. The streak made Jennings a 2004 TV folk hero, and he appeared as a guest on shows including The Tonight Show, The Late Show with David Letterman, Good Morning America, Live with Regis and Kelly, and Sesame Street. Barbara Walters named him
one of “The Ten Most Fascinating People of the Year.” The Christian Science Monitor called him “the king of Trivia Nation,” and Slate magazine dubbed him “the Michael Jordan of trivia, the Seabiscuit of geekdom.” ESPN: The Magazine called him “smug [and] punchable,” with “the personality of a hall monitor,” thus continuing America’s long national struggle between jocks and nerds. Following his Jeopardy streak, Jennings’s product endorsements have included FedEx, Microsoft Encarta, Allstate, the ever-present Cingular ad, and even his one-time nemesis H&R Block. He speaks about the importance of learning at college campuses and corporate events, and has co-invented two trivia games: the Can You Beat Ken? board game from University Games and Quizzol-
ogy, a CD trivia game from Major Games. He has released the book Brainiac: Adventures in the Curious, Competitive, Compulsive World of Trivia Buffs, about his bizarre Jeopardy adventures and about the phenomenon of trivia in American culture, as well as Maphead: Charting the Wide, Weird World of Geography Wonks, a book about the allure of geography. His latest book is Because I Said So: The Truth Behind the Myths, Tales, and Warnings Every Generation Passes Down to Its Kids. Watch out for the ads all over camselling tickets (we’ll be selling them at the door too!), and come stop by the or two for the Academic Speaking event presenting Ken Jennings in the gym on Wednesday, March 20, 2013.
DON’T FORGET TO VOTE!
VOTE NOW UNTIL MARCH 8 AT 3 P.M.
Another year and another election cycle almost gone. You can’t miss election time each year here at the U of L as hundreds of posters (some better than others) are plastered on the walls indicating that once again many of our students are willing to take that extra step in making your campus experience just a little bit better.
While the posters, Facebook pages, videos, town hall speeches, and debates have all passed, the most important part is ongoing right now! From Wednesday, March 6 until Friday, March 8 at 3 p.m., every undergraduate student will have the opportunity to vote online for their new representatives! An e-mail was sent to all students with a link to the voting
page, or if you missed that, the link is also at ulsu.ca. While every election is important, this year’s election is of particular interest due to the new Executive Council structure that was brought in this year with the addition of the VP External position. This new position will play a very active role in advocating to all levels of government, a role
that until now was spread out among the other executives. The race for VP External has three people running which is very encouraging that this new position has people willing to take it on! I encourage you all to make an informed vote this year. Head to ulsu. ca for the candidates’ platforms and then vote!
MAR 8 MAR12 MAR 15 MAR 18
International Women’s Day Galt Museum viewing gallery @ 6:00 pm to 10:00 pm
International Women’s Day University of lethbridge @ 10:00 am to 2:00 pm
test their logik concert The Owl Acoustic Lounge @ 5:00 pm to 6:00 pm
bottle water free day Internationally all day
NOW IN THE BOOKSTORE!
for the 2013/2014 school year!
Inquire or apply at firstname.lastname@example.org
For all These Positions:
Editor in Chief
Coordinates the staff, content, and stakeholder relationships for the Publishing Society, as well as the Opinion section
Ad sales for revenue, collections, and distribution of the newspaper each week
Runs the business office; oversees budgets and revenues
Work with the Production Manager to design the pages and build them each week
Supervises creative staff and coordinates the design of the paper, illustration and graphic design
Oversees the production and design of the paper, and builds pages
News/Campus Beat, Features, Entertainment, Sports and Lifestyle; Generate and manage content for each section on a weekly basis
Oversee and generate the photographic image content
Checks content for grammatical, spelling, and factual accuracy
Oversees the website content, administers the TLF posting site, and uploads content to the web
Account Representative Assisting the Ad Manager with ad sales and accounts recievable collections
E-mail applications including cover letter, resume, and portfolios to:
Deadline: March 20, 2013 at midnight
March 7, 2013 • 30
Jobs, jobs, jobs!
Crop Production Services (March 15) YMCA Aquaatics Director, Leth ~ YMCA (March 16) Agribusiness Assistant, AB/SK/MB ~ Richardson International (April 15) Pricing Analyst, Cgy ~ Gibsons Energy (March 21) Community Rehab Worker, Leth ~ Lethbridge Family Services (March 23) Infrastructure Design & Construction Coordinator, Leth ~ County of Lethbridge (March 15) Residential Nurse, Cgy ~ Woods Homes (March 24) Junior Project Manager, Cgy/Sherwood Park ~ RCGI (March 24) Marketing/Event Coordinator, Ponoka/Red Deer ~ Jones Boys Saddlery & Western Wear (April 15) Contract Home Provider, Lethbridge – Lethbridge Family Services (March 28) Administrative Assistant, Leth �– Chinook Arch Regional Library System (March 20) Junior Controller, Medicine Hat – Davis Auto Group (March 27) Administrative/Human Resources Assistant, Airdrie –Eaton (March 15) Junior Account Manager, CalgBLJC Orange (March 27) Warehouse Material Handlers, Edm, Calg, Red Deer, Saskatoon – Consolidated Gypsum (March 30) Community Rehabilitation Worker I, Leth – Lethbridge Family Services DACAPO Program (March 30) AASAS Chief Executive Officer, Calg – Association of Alberta Sexual Assault Services (March 18) Sales Associates – WIRELESSWAVE, Leth – Glentel (March 30) Management Residential Supervisor, Leth – Quest Support Services (March 29) Body Shop Technician, Barrhead, AB - Davis Auto Group (March 31) Community Rehabilitation Worker I, Leth – Lethbridge Family Services (March 11)
Temporary • Deloitte National Leadership Conference, Cgy ~ Deloitte (March 22) • Stampede Adult Supervisor, Cgy ~ Boys & Girls Clubs of Cgy (March 15) • Promotional Representative, Edm/Cgy ~ InField Marketing (March 15) • Intermediate Soil Scientist, Regina/Saskatoon ~ Stantec Consulting (March 16) • Reservations Manager, Blue River ~ Mike Wiegele Helicopter Skiing (April 26) • Human Resources Generalist, Leth ~ Lethbridge Iron Works (March 23)
Let us introduce you to CES (Career & Employment Services). CES is a student service office dedicated to assisting you with your career and job search needs. We’re within the Career & Co-op Services office in AH154, along with Applied Studies and the Management and Arts & Science Cooperative Education programs. CCS office hours are 9 a.m. – 12 p.m. and 1 p.m. – 4 p.m., Monday to Friday.
Go to our website for more detailed information on our services: www.uleth.ca/ross/ces.
Upcoming information sessions: Deloitte CA recruitment & interview process workshops ~ Cgy & Leth Campuses See all details and register at www.uleth.ca/ross/ces. CMA/CGA ~ CPA designation discussion March 26, 6 to 8 p.m., Room AH118 RSVP www.uleth.ca/ross/ces/events Workshops to March 22 (to see full schedule and sign up go online to www.uleth.ca/ross/ces/workshops) CES resume/cover letter workshops: * Thursday, March 7, 10:50 a.m. – 1:20 p.m. * Tuesday, March 12, 10:50 a.m. – 1:30 p.m. * Monday, March 18, 3 p.m. – 5:30 p.m. * Thursday, March 21, 10:50 a.m. – 1:20 p.m. Career exploration 101 workshops: * Wednesday, March 13, 2 p.m. – 4 p.m. * Tuesday, March 19, 10:50 a.m. – 12:50 p.m. CES career portfolios for interviews workshops: * Monday, March 11, 3 p.m. – 4:30 p.m. CES job search & networking workshops: * Friday, March 15, 10 a.m. – 12 p.m. * Wednesday, March 20, 3 p.m. – 5 p.m. CES interview techniques workshops: * Thursday, March 14, 1:40 p.m. – 4 p.m. * Friday, March 22, 11 a.m. – 1:30 p.m. For full descriptions of the job postings below visit CES online job boards! http://www.uleth.ca/ross/ces/job-board Full time • Communications Coordinator, Leth ~ County of Lethbridge (March 8) • Associate Sales Representative ~ Cargill (March 15) • Associate Grain Marketing Advisor ~ Cargill (March 15) • Associate Production Supervisor ~ Cargill (March 15) • Management Trainee ~ Guillevin International (April 30) • Sun Life Financial Advisor ~ Sun Life Financial (March 10) • Corporate Account Manager, Cgy ~ Lyreco (March 10) • Synthetic Organic Chemist, North York ~ Toronto Research Chemicals (April 30) • Energy Sales Representative, Leth ~ Pareto (March 14) • Agronomist, Taber/Vauxhall/Brooks ~ Crop Production Services (March 15) • Crop Production Advisor, SK/AB ~
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Summer postings • Chess Ambassador/Chess Educator, Med Hat ~ Med Hat Chess Society (March 8) • Historical Interpreter, Crowsnest Pass ~ Frank Slide Interpretive Centre (March 8) • Dining Hall Steward, Beaver Mines ~ Bert Sheppard Scout Reserve (March 31) • Property Assessment Data Collector, Taber ~ Municipal District of Taber (March 15) • Summer Camp Counsellor, Bragg Creek ~ Easter Seals Camp Horizon (March 31) • Parks Maintenance Operators, Didsbury ~ Town of Didsbury (March 25)
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Travel Counselor; Cashier; Interpretive Guide; Shuttle Bus Driver; Gift Shop Clerk ~ Head Smashed in Buffalo Jump (March 28) Production Intern ~ Cargill (March 15) Summer Swim Coach, Fort MacLeod ~ Sharks Swim Club (April 30) Industrial Herbicide Applicator, Red Deer ~ Renu-L-Tech (March 9) Summer Ambassador, Cgy/Edm ~ Recycling Council of Alberta (March 9) Program Coordinator; Outdoor Educator; Summer Maintenance; Camp Counsellor; Lifeguard; Cook; Assistant Cook, Sylvan Lake ~ Camp Kannawin (March 12) Clubhouse Staff, Leth ~ Henderson Lake Golf Club (March 13) Summer Historical Interpreter ~ Alberta Historical Sites (March 22) Summer Student Accounting/Internal Audit, Cgy ~ Trican Well Service Ltd. (March 16) Summer Sales Route Rep, Leth ~ PepsiCo Foods Canada (March 16) Seasonal Operations Staff ~ Viterra (March 13) Student – Building Technician ~ SNC – Lavalin Operations & Maintenance (March 15) Guest Services Rep; Campground and Hospitality; Security Personnel; Revenue Auditor/Cash Control Clerk; General Maintenance Worker; Grounds Maintenance, Cgy ~ Calaway Park (March 15) Agronomy Student; Agribusiness Student, AB/SK ~ Richardson International (April 15) Teacher Counselor Instructor, Cgy/Van ~ Wynchemna (March 18) Giftshop Sales Associate, Drumheller ~ Royal Tyrrell Museum (April 30) Healthy U Promotional Team Member, Cgy ~ DDB Canada (March 24) Trait Development Associate, Leduc/Saskatoon ~ Bayer CropScience (March 15) Marketing/PR Internship, Cgy ~ Live Out There Inc (April 30) Environmental Student, Cgy ~ Cenovus (March 17) Watershed Outreach Assistant, Red Deer ~ Red Deer River Watershed Alliance (March 8) Technical Support Student – Pulp Division, Whitecourt ~ Millar Western Forest Products (March 31) Visitor Facilities Attendant (Cleaner), Waterton Park ~ Parks Canada (March 8) Sales Representative. Calg – Vecova (March 4) General Maintenance Workers, Leth – University of Lethbridge Facilities Dept (March 16) CFIB/Scotiabank Internship in Public Policy and Entrepreneurship, Calg, Vanc, Winnipeg, Ottawa – Cdn Federation of Independent Business (March 29) Museum Assistant, Crowsnest Pass – Crowsnest Museum and Archives (March 15) Summer Day Camp Leaders; Golf Course Seasonal FT staff: Turf care Members; Outdoor Services Supervisor; Outdoor Services Attendants; Kitchen Stewards; Line Cooks; Golf Shop Attendants; Food & Beverage porters. Calg – The Glencoe Club (March 28) Security Analysis Assistant, Calg – The Calgary Airport Authority (March 29) Collections Manager Assistant;
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Education Program Assistant; Tourist Information/Front Desk Clerk; Horticulture/landscaping, Pincher Creek& District Historical Society – (April 26) Marketing & Graphics Internship; Sales Planning and Administration Internship (unpaid) , Blue River, BC – Mike Wiegele Helicopter Skiing (April 5) Summer Fun Workers, Didsbury – Town of Didsbury (March 28) Junior Aquatics Technician, Calg – Tera Environmental Consultants (March 29) Summer Reading Program Coordinator, Summer Reading Program Assistant, Airdrie – Airdrie Public Library (March 25) Visitor Safety Technician, Waterton Lakes Field Unit – Parks Canada Agency (March 15, 4 p.m.) Vegetation Management Technologist I, Leth – Alberta Parks (March 15, 4 p.m.) The Ultimate Summer Marketing Internship, AB & SK – Vivint (March 30)
Part time • Several positions – editorial, production, and management, Leth ~ The Meliorist (March 20) • Youth Worker, Cgy ~ Boys & Girls Clubs of Cgy (March 15) • Guest Services, Cgy ~ Butterfield Acres Farm (May 1) • Women’s Competitive Gymnastics Coach, Lethbridge – Westwind Gymnastics (March 27) • Brand Ambassador, various AB locations – Prime Marketing (April 30) • Fundraiser – World Vision, Edmonton – Donorworx (March 27) • Disability Services Workers (DSW-1) and (DSW-1 & DSW-2) Complex needs, Leth – Quest Support Services (March 29) International • English Teacher ~ Ameson Education & Cultural Exchange Foundation (April 10) • China Internship Program ~ CRCC Asia (March 15) • Children’s Camps; Au Pair; Daycare Jobs; Teaching English; Hotel/Hospitality & Cooking ~ Scotia Personnel (March 14) • Teach English in South Korea ~ Avalon English (March 15) • Youth Ambassador – Ghana 2013 ~ Youth Challenge International (March 15) • Youth Ambassador Guyana ~ Youth Challenge International (March 15) • Teach English in South Korea ~ Eagle Consulting (April 15) • China Internship, Beijing/Shanghai ~ CISC Global (March 22) • Financial Analyst Internship, Beijing/Shanghai ~ CISC Global (March 22) • Legal Internships, Beijing/Shanghai ~ CISC Global (March 22) • Teach, Travel and Earn Money! No experience required ~ Aclipse (March 24) • AYC: Opportunity to Teach in China – Ameson Education and Cultural Exchange Foundation (March 29) • Teaching English as a Second Language, S. Korea- Adventure Teaching (March 14) For details of the postings and information on the application processes, go to www.uleth.ca/ross/ces/job-board.
Try to find this pronghorn in this weekâ€™s issue of the Meliorist. E-mail the page number and a brief description of where you found it to email@example.com. You will be entered to win our monthly pronghorn draw. You can enter as many times in the month as we publish.
Jokes Nursery school teacher says to her class, "Who can use the word 'definitely' in a sentence?"
Little Johnny from the back of the class stands up and asks, "Does a fart have lumps?"
First a little girl says, "The sky is definitely blue." Teacher says, "Sorry, Amy, but the sky can be gray, or orange..."
The teacher looks horrified and says, "Johnny! Of course not!" "OK... then I definitely shit my pants..."
Second little boy: "Trees are definitely green." "Sorry, but in the autumn the trees are brown."