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CONTENTS

Ryan Macfarlane

Editor-in-Chief einc@themeliorist.ca @_ra_mac

Alisha VanWieren

Campus Life Editor cl.editor@themeliorist.ca @vdubsmeliorist

Andrew McCutcheon

Garrett Bishoff

Meredith Pritchard

Travis Robinson

Features Editor f.editor@themeliorist.ca @smartstooge

Opinions Editor o.editor@themeliorist.ca @CoffeeAndLiars

Arts + Entertainment ae.editor@themeliorist.ca @mereyrose

Sports Editor s.editor@themeliorist.ca @sivartrobinson

Business Manager

Production Manager

b.manager@themeliorist.ca

p.manager@themeliorist.ca

Nico Koppe

Kenzie Ferguson Keely Goulding

Advertising + Distribution Manager

Photo Editor

Printing

Mohamed Hassen

Karl Johnston

Kjel Erickson

a.manager@themeliorist.ca

p.editor@themeliorist.ca

Creative Director + Illustrator

Copy Editor

Sam Loewen

c.director@themeliorist.ca

Emma Ferguson

Design Assistants

Southern Alberta Newspaper Group Cover

Sam Loewen c.editor@themeliorist.ca + Taneal Viergutz The Meliorist:

Contributors

Dr. Jay Gamble Taneal Viergutz Tyrell Nielsen Mae Best Benjamin Goodwin Clay Roenspiess David Copithorne

Mel-ior-ism (meel始e riz始m) the doctrine that the world tends to become better or may be made better by human effort

CAMPUS LIFE OPINIONS FEATURES SPORTS ARTS + ENTERTAINMENT TLFS STUDENTS UNION SU166, 4401 University Drive West, Lethbridge AB, T1K 3M4 Phone (403) 329 2334 themeliorist.ca @The_Meliorist

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LETTER FROM THE EDITOR

— Granted, Lethbridge really is only eighth on the list of windiest cities year-round, but it’s second, only to St. John’s, in having the most windy days. Lethbridge has just under 116 days with wind over 40 kilometres per hour. That kind of wind does something to a population. I’ve lived here most of my life, minus my first two years of life in Winnipeg (having been born there) and the year I lived in France. At this point, I’m a seasoned veteran when it comes to handling wind. That isn’t to say that I handle it well, though. Those who know me know that I take my bike nearly everywhere. Recently, I even brought my bike into one of the pubs beside the university – to the amazement of a Dutchman, who told me, “I’m from Holland, and even I’ve never seen someone bring a bike into a bar.” As much as I love riding my bike, it sucks when it gets windy. If I’m lucky, I’ll have the wind to my back on one of the two rides I make. Those rides are glorious, because I glide to school with barely a pedal pushed. More often than not it seems that the wind changes direction throughout the day, and I’m forced to ride against it both directions. When the wind is at its worst, blustery 80 kilometres per hour – or faster! – wind, I become trapped, merely pedalling a stationary bike. It would be easier, it seems at these times, to simply dismount and walk. Even so, on foot the wind remains ruthless and remaining upright near impossible. Despite all its inconvenience, what the wind does is teach us to persevere. Keep pedalling that bike, keeping pushing against the wind, and you’ll eventually make it home. That’s not a bad lesson. Certainly around midterms, when text books pile up and notes beg to be revisited, perseverance is really the only thing that will get you through.

Why, though, even bring up the wind in the first place? Isn’t perseverance one of the essential skills you’re developing through your post-secondary education? Well, probably – but that certainly isn’t the essential skill you’re developing (hopefully, by the end of your education when you’re facing the same problems as experts in whatever field, you’ll be finding creative solutions to new problems). Wind develops its kind of perseverance in a unique but subtle way. In fact, you probably don’t realize that the wind is working itself on you. If you’re new to Lethbridge, live here for a little bit longer and then try going to any other, less windy city. You might notice that when people are complaining of a windy day you’re thinking how calm it is. The perseverance that Lethbridge wind fosters isn’t just about overcoming some obstacle outside of yourself. Really, it’s about realizing, years later after leaving this city, whether permanently or temporarily, how much it has unconsciously accustomed you to its terrible embrace. This isn’t to say that anyone who lives in Lethbridge gets used to Lethbridge wind. Far from it. In fact, the longer you live here the more you come to dislike the wind – especially after the calm, warm prairie summer. What Lethbridge wind really creates is a sense of commonality. Guaranteed, the most popular topic recently among Lethbridge Twitter users has been the wind. Even in conversation, the wind finds a way to creep into all subjects. When it’s all around us, everything can be casually and causally tied to the wind. As we head into fall, when winter always threatens to appear at any moment, the wind is a reminder that we find a sense of community, despite (or because of) miserable weather, in the strangest places.

Ryan Macfarlane Editor-in-Chief

— 3


CAMPUS LIFE

Embarrassing stuff happens to the best of us. It’s usually not funny at the time, but it can make for a hilarious story. Appearing in your university newspaper for the first time is a safe place where you can anonymously air all of your dirty laundry (in around 150 words, although excections may be made). Submissions can be emailed to me: cl.editor@themeliorist.ca or (eventually) submitted online at themeliorist.ca I was driving home with my mother, my step dad, and my grandmother, and they were asking me about slang words (grandma recently started watching Breaking Bad so she thought she was über-hip). They were asking me silly things like “What is a toke?” and “How do you know you're on a trip?” when suddenly my mother from the driver's seat turns around and asks me what tea-bagging was. And so, I had to explain to my Catholic grandmother what exactly tea-bagging was. I have never wanted to jump out of a moving car so badly in my life. #awkward When I was in grade seven, I had my very first "boyfriend.” We had been dating for about a month and we were outside walking around at lunch. He then took an apple from his lunch bag, threw it at my head, yelled, “I'm breaking up with you!” and ran away. I spent the rest of lunch crying under a tree in an alley. It was nine years ago, but I still don't like apples. One Friday, I woke up in my bed like any other Friday, but this Friday was different. First, I didn’t remember getting to bed or even leaving Studio. Second, my underwear was soaking wet as I lay on top of all my sheets in just my boxers. Third, there was an empty bag of McDonald’s next to me. I was in a state of distress, as I worked at 8:30 that morning – but luckily woke up at 7:45, no thanks to the fact that I did not set an alarm! I say to myself, “Well, let’s just get to work and think about this later.” I get up, and while walking across my carpet, I step in something: a squish. I press my fingers against the moisture and smell my fingers… piss. Looking at the puddle I notice it’s a solid circle, no pee trail, as if I had taken out my penis to pee in a puddle, pretending my floor was a urinal. Now I know I peed myself, so I go check my jeans. They are dry. As I have no memory of this event, I recreate the event in my mind. The only explanation is after a friend sent me home in a cab from Studio, because I was too drunk, I got the cab driver to stop at McDonalds. As I got home with my McDonald’s, I obviously wanted to be comfortable, so I disrobed to my underwear. I’m sure I stood in my boxers, eating McDonald’s, finally relaxed and truly enjoying it, as I finally let my pee trickle down my legs into the rug beneath me. It’s the only explanation for what happened. The worst part of this story is that I’m the only roommate in my house with a connected bathroom! I was in the fourth grade; it was towards the end of the school year and I was a patrol for the crosswalk at our school. I was on duty one lunch hour and I had to pee so bad it hurt. And I literally had to just stand there, holding a stop sign for half an hour. Eventually I couldn’t handle it and wet my jeans completely, leaving a huge puddle around my feet. But I was on patrol duty, so there I continued to stand. Soaked. I patrolled the rest of my lunch hour and then spent the whole afternoon in my piss-soaked jeans. Here’s the best part: Nobody noticed at any point during that day that I was wearing pants completely drenched with my own piss. So it’s just embarrassing on the inside. One time I had a sock that was gross and smelly, so I thought if I put a bunch of Febreze all over it and just forgot about it for a while, it’d be better. It got moldy and gross and smelled even worse.


When I was little I tried giving myself a bowl cut, bowl and all. My hair ended up becoming a jagged mountain range silhouette. But that didn’t deter me, no. Next time I knew I needed a haircut, I tried cutting my hair with no bowl. I got bored after I cut a square out of my bangs. My dad used to call stuff “heavy duty” when he thought it worked well. I liked to emulate him. Once I saw his fishing gear, boots, hat, jacket, and waterproof pants. I put it all on, walked out to our family gathering and said as seriously as I could, “This sure is some heavy duty gear!” I was laughed at, and I was furious because I thought I looked awesome. I didn’t. I was out walking with my mom in winter and we came up to a snowdrift that was steep. I could not get up the slope no matter how hard I tried. My mom offered help and through frozen tears I screamed, “No!” About half an hour later, I got up it. One time I was having sex with this guy I didn’t know very well. We were in a room in his basement, and halfway through – when we were both butt-naked – his roommate walked in and said “Oh! Hey guys!” and walked across the room to grab something he needed. I panicked and scrambled to cover myself up, but the guy I was sleeping with just said “Oh, hey!” and lay sprawled naked on the floor. Then, as his roommate was leaving, he said, “Have fun!” and shut the door. The weirdest part was that neither of them thought anything of it and I was the only uncomfortable one. I was in Vancouver a little while ago with my cousins, and we started to go to the club on East Hastings Street called New Rickshaw. We were going to go see a band, so we started drinking before then, because they live in Burnaby and that’s a bit of a drive . . . and we were standing in line for the club and I really had to go to the bathroom, but we kept waiting. We were in line for like 45 minutes and I still really had to go to the bathroom, and it was like eleven o’clock at night, and nothing was open, and they wouldn’t let us into the club yet. So, I got out of line and I just started walking in the opposite direction to try and find a bathroom. I was two blocks down and there was nothing open, and there was nothing around – there were no gas stations and no 24-hour places. So, I went into a corner and I just started peeing on myself. I was wearing denim shorts and I didn’t even try to take them off – like, it was happening and I let it happen. I was peeing all over myself, and in the middle of this, a gentleman came up to try to hit on me and then saw that I was pissing my pants and then backed away. So I finished peeing and my cousins found me and they said, “There’s some pizza place around the corner that’s open. Do you want any pizza? Do you want to go to the bathroom there?” And I said “No! There’s piss all over me, I can’t go inside!” So we went inside there and I tried to hide because I had jeans on and there was a pretty telling wet spot. So I went into the bathroom and I just soaked my entire shorts with water and put them back on, because then they at least looked uniform. So, end of story, we didn’t even get into the club. We get back in the taxi and head to their place in Burnaby and half way through the drive, I realized that I had to go to the bathroom again. So I said, “Guys, we have to stop. I really have to pee.” And they were like, “No, no, we’ll wait till we get to the place in Burnaby” That’s like 15 minutes away, so I was like, “No, guys, I really have to go to the bathroom,” and they wouldn’t stop and I was in the back, so I just started pissing all over the back seat. So I was drunk and brought this guy home with me from a house party. Right after we got home I came out of the bathroom and he was passed out on top of all my blankets on my bed. I decided to awkwardly just crawl under the blankets and go to bed. When I woke up, he was way too close to me for someone I didn’t know so I decided to get up and move to the other side of the bed. When I went to lie down I realized my bed was soaking wet with his pee… I stood there in shock for about twenty minutes until he started to wake up. In a state of panic, I decided to run back to the other side of the bed and pretend to still be sleeping. He slowly woke up and realized he’d peed my bed then awkwardly got up and left my house without saying anything. I have never seen him again and I am relieved.

— 5


CAMPUS LIFE

NO LONGER A PETTING ZOO THE CALGARY ZOO IS ONE OF THE BEST ZOOS IN THE WORLD. WITH ITS FANTASTIC ELEPHANTS, DINOSAUR EXHIBIT, AND PENGUINS, IT’S HARD TO COMPETE WITH SUCH GREAT FEATURES. THE ZOO ON CAMPUS, HOWEVER, USED TO BE MORE COMPARABLE TO A PETTING ZOO THAN A PLACE OF REAL SUBSTANCE. It seemed that our campus bar was happier sticking to its old ways than pleasing students, like a petting zoo that wasn’t willing to let you feed their animals, content letting their business go to Pop’s West or Backstreet Pub. Now, with new management, the Zoo is revitalized and is a serious competitor in the west Lethbridge bar scene. The new zookeeper (manager) Shawn Mullen now runs the Zoo like a safari; all of the staff are “positive, they’re happy to be here, which makes it comfortable for everyone that comes in,” Shawn describes, excited to let me see their new exhibits. Along with a paint job, new TVs and an entirely new menu, it’s easy to see why revenue at the Zoo is already up 35 per cent. The new paint job includes a new mural that welcomes you up at the top of the stairs, as you realize that this isn’t just a hallway with some classrooms; there is a pub up here. Shawn explains that there are “birds that lead the way,” a rhinoceros, and a giraffe. The entire mural was done by Adam Campbell who plays on the name “The Zoo,” really showing its new welcoming atmosphere, akin to all of the changes that this pub has going in its favour. Even nights like Karaoke Night can seem like an animal house with how busy the bar becomes. However, Shawn goes the extra mile as they empty almost their entire draft supply and still do the best they can to seat as many guests as possible. “There’s nowhere to sit,” Shawn recalls hearing during karaoke as the Zoo sells over 120 Cherry Bombs, their Tuesday drink special (talk about a zoo!). “Whoa, whoa, whoa,” says Shawn, “let me go get a table from the patio.” This really shows, without a doubt, that he is here to serve the students. Events like karaoke, dirty bingo, and open mic nights are a great way for students to unwind from studying (or just have a good time, Lethbridge-style) and meet new people. These fresh events are gaining even more steam as they receive more funding and more attendance. They are about as fresh as the updated menu, as Shawn moves away from deep-fried food and to “healthier options” to entice students to come out for lunch or dinner. Not to mention, if you’re single and want to sing your mating call, events at the Zoo are the perfect place to do so. The “feed” at the Zoo has been upgraded from last year as well; it has contemporary options like the Jerk Chicken Wrap. Shawn talks of how he was originally trained as a chef and is excited for the new menu. As far as contemporary

BENJAMIN GOODWIN KJEL ERICKSON

meals go, “our menu is right on par with all the restaurants on the west side.” Shawn describes the “fresh” take they have introduced to keep up with the times. “Of course we still have the two-can-dine special because it just makes sense” for students to get the most bang for their buck, which is ultimately what the Zoo is about. When you think about it, the Zoo isn’t showing us animals, but it’s feeding its best attractions, which are the students. We are the animals of the Zoo and they intend to continue offering better service and food for the students. “We’re not here to turn a profit,” says Shawn, “we’re here to provide a service to the students.” No other pub or bar in Lethbridge would be able to make such an impacting statement. It is a business that doesn’t want to make money off of you, but is just there to ensure you are fed and have a great time. When you think of the Zoo as a ULSU business, this makes sense. The University of Lethbridge Students Union is here for you, and why wouldn't the bar they have do the same? The Zoo even used to bring in bands like the Trews, Tegan and Sara, USS, and Michael Bernard Fitzgerald; Shawn wants to bring this back to the Zoo. Events like this really bring out one’s animal nature, so why shouldn’t we have them on campus? “The more food I sell, the lower I can bring my prices,” Shawn says as he talks about trying to bring in more customers. There we have it: the most economical bar in Lethbridge saying that if you go there more often, it will become even more affordable. That isn’t to say it is a cheap bar, because, even from last year, “the quality of food compared to last year is through the roof” as they switch to healthier choices while keeping ties to being a bar. The Zoo isn’t just a petting zoo anymore. It has become much more. Even more attractions, like a juke box and more TVs, are still coming in to add to the Zoo’s already amazing new atmosphere. If we look at the bigger picture of the Zoo, we will realize that we are the animals in this zoo we call life, all trying to get what we need to survive. Our animal instincts have gotten us to university already, so why not go grab a bite to eat at the familiar yet new Zoo. You’ll be thanking your inner beast that you did.

— 7


OPINIONS

TRUDEAU’S NEW LEAF — CLAY ROENSPIESS Justin Trudeau, Leader of the Liberal party of Canada, recently made headlines by publicly supporting the legalization of marijuana. He was attending a rally in Kelowna B.C. at the time, and was quoted as saying, “I am in favor of legalizing [marijuana], tax and regulate.” Interestingly, he cites “economic responsibility” as one of the key factors in this argument. He was later quoted as saying the “current model of the war on drugs is not working,” which could not be truer. Marijuana legislation has been prominent in the news recently and is attracting a lot of attention internationally. Given the current political atmosphere, support of legalization seems to be a shrewd move. In another respect, many have claimed that he is simply attempting to obtain votes from a demographic that has historically been politically passive: people ages 18-25. With Trudeau now at the helm of the Liberal party, some figures estimate that up to 53 per cent of respondents would vote for the Liberal Party, while in the same study it was found that only 31 per cent of respondents would vote for the current ruling Conservative Party. Much of this instant popularity is due to his rock star status in Canadian politics. After all, he is the son of Pierre Trudeau, long-time Prime Minister, and one of the most beloved figures in Canadian history. I think the argument can be made that Justin Trudeau is the future of Canadian politics. In this respect, I think the man’s intentions in regards to his stance on marijuana should be discussed. I think the question is summed up twofold: first, that this was a shrewd and informed political decision, and second, that he is a political idealist looking to change Canadian politics. The political environment just seems right for a move like this. Legalization has been a hot topic recently as both Colorado and Washington have passed legislation for legalization, with British Columbia and about nine other American states closely behind in the process of reformation. Popular support has never been higher, with some polls reporting that the majority of the Canadian population is in fact in favour of legalization.

— 10

I think this is an interesting point to make. In the year 1969, popular support for legalization could be estimated to be no more than 15 per cent. That was one year into Pierre Trudeau’s first term as Prime Minister. Marijuana advocacy groups are rampant these days and their numbers continue to swell. All things considered, given both the political and social atmosphere, marijuana legalisation is not all that radical. The economic side of the argument speaks for itself. Canadian taxpayers have paid an average of roughly five hundred million dollars annually on enforcement and punishment related to marijuana convictions over the last five years. The marijuana industry in B.C. alone is worth upwards of six billion annually. With the potential enforcement of the tax and regulate system of economics, that would mean an influx of billions of dollars in government revenue. I would like to point out that no matter what your stance on marijuana, hundreds of millions of extra revenue for the government is a good thing for everyone. Furthermore, given that Trudeau has worked with youth his entire career and favours education spending, it is a safe bet to assume that the 18-25 demographic will benefit (not to mention that some statistics claim that over 50 per cent of regular marijuana users exist within this demographic). Now, with all this being said, I think Trudeau’s idealism should be addressed. The man seems to genuinely want to change Canadian politics, and endorses a transparent and accountable methodology in his approach. He seems open and candid in his interviews, and his policies seem to mirror these findings. In the same rally, he was quoted as saying, “one of the only ways to keep it out of the hands of our kids, because the current model of the war on drugs is not working . . . we need to use evidence and science to move forward.” Trudeau and I agree on this. The current model of the war on drugs is outdated and stagnant. A little innovation might be exactly what’s needed. Personally, I like my politicians to display a little bit of idealism. Not too much, but certainly enough to reinvigorate the political

JUSTIN TRUDEAU IS THE FUTURE OF CANADIAN POLITICS atmosphere. I think this is, politically, a great move for Trudeau, which strikes a nice balance between being well-informed and innovative. I find it very interesting that Trudeau cites economic responsibility as a primary goal, and I genuinely believe the man could have just the right amount of idealism to bring some much-needed innovation and enthusiasm to this country’s political scene. They say the best leaders are those who do not seek the mantle of power. Trudeau passed on the Liberal party’s leadership once in 2008 and once more in 2011 before outright retracting his name from the running in 2012. It excites me to know the he has adopted an informed, contemporary position on such a controversial topic. I can’t say what the future holds for Justin Trudeau, nor do I speak for the masses when I sing his praise. What I can say is that he has impressed me enough to earn my vote.


OPINIONS

— ANDREW McCUTCHEON

I’ve always considered myself to be a pretty average guy. Maybe not average to the point of Lou Reed’s Average Guy average, but pretty close. I like my coffee hot, my pizza round, and my settlers Catan. There is one opinion I have, however, that pushes me further and further away from the middle of the bell curve whenever the topic is brought up. I absolutely cannot stand the movie Juno. Most of the people within our demographic seem to adore Juno. I haven’t met more than two people who agree with me when I say it’s one of the most banal and pointless films I’ve ever seen. Perhaps it’s the fact that it was so overhyped that by the time I finally saw it, it couldn’t possibly live up to the expectations I had. The other possibility is that it’s just an awful, shallow attempt at making an “indie” film. Most people describe Juno as an indie teenage comedy which is surprising in two ways. The first is that they use the word “indie.” Juno had a budget of seven million dollars, was made by a moderately-sized studio that had released Stranger Than Fiction just a year previous, and was distributed by Fox. Juno is many things, but an independent film is not one of those things. So we can remove the word “indie” from the

description. We are then left with “teenage comedy.” I will acquiesce that the film’s plot centres on teenagers. It can scarcely be called a comedy, however, as I’ve yet to find any actual jokes within the film. There are many pop culture references, lots of zany slang is slung, and Michael Cera is awkward – but legitimate, real, honest-to-blog jokes? They are nowhere to be found. It’s hard to support an entire movie on the strength of Ellen Page being quirky. Moreover, when did quirky become a substitute for characterization? Throughout the movie we are assaulted by the fact that Page’s character is so different and so unique, and she just refuses to conform. In one of the movie’s most overt shots Page works her way through a crowd of people in her high school, walking against the flow of traffic. This is obviously meant to show how much of a non-conformist she is and how she refuses to be held down by social standards. The only thing this scene showed me is that if I saw her character on the Fine Art’s Building stairs, I would probably want to murder her. Being different is not a personality trait. Juno isn’t even that much of a non-conformist when it really counts. Sure, she has a hamburger phone and puts all of her furniture on the lawn, but when it comes down to one of the most important decisions of her life, she allows herself to be swayed by the status quo. She walks into the abortion clinic ready to terminate her pregnancy when a pro-life peer assaults her with rhetoric on the developmental status of the fetus, saying that it probably has fingernails by that point. In another awkwardly overt seen, the drumming of fingernails in the waiting room of the clinic causes her to panic and decide to keep the baby. What the eff, Juno?! So you’ll be your own person when it’s easy and all you have to do

is pretend to smoke a pipe, because you’re so utterly unique, but then when the chips are down you’ll let anyone influence you? What sort of message is this movie sending? I know that if I had the equivalent of a tumour in the middle of my abdomen and someone told me it had fingernails, I’d be laughing all the way to the O.R. Truly though, it doesn’t inherently matter whether the message of Juno was pro-life or pro-choice. An awful movie can have whatever politics it wants and it will still be awful. What matters is that the film-makers created a character centred on non-conformity, then they immediately removed her agency at the first sign of duress. Creating a one-note character is bad writing. Creating a one-note character and then contradicting that character’s only personality trait is laughably bad writing. A bad film can be bad, however, and not be guilty of terrible crimes. Juno is guilty of terrible crimes. Juno is one of many movies within recent years to affirm the idea of non-conformity as a personality trait in youth across the country. At the end of the day, there is absolutely nothing wrong with being different and going against the norm. I really don’t care if you want to shave the sides of your head, pierce yourself silly, or cover your body with tattoos. I could care less if you love Japanese-Gothic-Lolita fashion, cover every inch of your bag with pins, reference obscure anime, and are just so totally quirky! What I care about is if you have anything to your identity, your character, and your life that lies beyond your quirks. Being different doesn’t make you better or worse than anyone else. It doesn’t mean you are smarter, cooler, or more interesting than the people who play football and read Entertainment Weekly. All it means is that you’re at a different spot on the bell curve. And if you stay that shallow, it’s going to get very lonely.

— 11


FEATURES

ALBERTA’S POLITICAL CAGE-MATCH —

TYRELL NIELSEN

Recently, two University Lethbridge students had the opportunity to come face-to-face with the very processes that are moving our province. Shania Mack, an Anthropology Major from Calgary, considers herself to be progressive. Sarah Stimson, who grew up on a farm just outside of Brooks, studies Public Health, and feels slightly more conservative. The two friends attended the debate between Danielle Smith of the Wildrose Alliance and Brian Mason of the Alberta NDP last Thursday September 26, with the hope of getting some clarity on a few issues. When asked to share some of their political priorities, Shania brought up social programs. "I support taxation for social programs. I think they're really beneficial. Healthcare is the best." In contrast, Sarah responded with "I'm not exactly into the social program idea. I'd rather keep more of my money." The two find commonality, however, in their concern over the government’s education policy. When I brought it up, Shania locked on. "We all know there have been cuts . . . and it's definitely made me upset." Sarah agreed, “I guess if you consider education as a social program, I’ll support anything that supports that." This is a point that resonated with most of the students there; wanting to know how a vote for either party could affect the future of education in the province played a significant role in filling up the room. Earlier in the day, I had the opportunity to interview the two party leaders, Smith and Mason, during which they made it very clear that they're aware of these issues, and presented their counter-plans. “You need to have consistent, year-over-year increases” says Wildrose Alliance leader Danielle Smith, “one or two or three percent.” This proposed strategy would keep the provincial post-secondary funding consistent with inflation. Smith listed her top priorities as, “fiscal discipline, grassroots decision making, and providing value for money.” With an acknowledgement of the need for and benefits of social programs, Smith made one stipulation: "We have to do them in the context of a balanced budget." In regards to PSE funding, Brian Mason of the

Alberta NDP had a similar answer: "We would have kept the promises made by [Alison] Redford of a two percent increase." He also added that instead of paying for social programs with money gained from inconsistent oil field royalty income, an NDP government would pay using the funds gained from tax revenues. "That would have easily taken care of the cut to post-secondary education." As we talked long-term vision for the provinces' natural resources, Mason explained, "We all own those resources together, but not just this generation.” Proposing “a substantial increase in [oil] royalties,” Mason takes issue with the comparatively low rate of taxation imposed on foreign companies, calling it "intergenerational theft.” These issues spilled over into the evening. Questions regarding cuts to PSE funding, international oil pipelines, and reformation of the provincial health care system were hotly contested by both debaters. Mason earned applause throughout the evening, especially with his views on pipelines. “We’re opposed to pipelines that export our jobs. We’re opposed to pipelines that export unprocessed bitumen for upgrading in Texas or China.” Smith’s success seemed to come from her views on cuts to Public Services, specifically dealing with education. As the result of these cuts, she cited larger class sizes, fewer programs, and less applicants being accepted into specific fields of study. “We’re seeing a reduction in nursing positions. When I look at the demographics in health care, and I see the number of people who are going to be retiring from nursing. The last place we’d want to see cuts in student spaces is in nursing, but that’s a decision that’s being placed on post-secondary institutions.” I caught up with debate moderator and professor Harold Jansen the following day. As a professor who specializes in Alberta politics, Jansen seemed the man to talk too. I asked him what stood out most about the evening. “Overall, the thing that struck me was the attempts of both parties to moderate – that they were very clearly trying to position themselves to say, this is what the political party system is going to look like once the Conservatives are done.” However, he was critical of elements of both

parties’ economic policies. With regards to Smith, "I didn't like the whole, ‘Oh we can cut spending and have billions of dollars in savings and not have it affect public services.’ I don't think you can cut that much and balance the budget – cutting spending without affecting frontline services. I remain completely skeptical of that.” I followed that up with a question about the New Democrats’ plan to pipe less crude out of the province, instead planning to develop refineries and create jobs here in Alberta. “The policies Brian Mason is suggesting were tried in the 1970’s and it cost the government millions of dollars. The track record isn't good. I remain to be convinced of it.” Jansen summarized, “we could have very low taxes and low quality public services, or very high taxes and high quality public services. That’s a debate we’ll have to have.” As for Shania and Sarah, they also had some comments following the debate. “I liked that they complimented each other, because it kind of makes me think that they are thinking about what’s being said. I think they both had open minds.” Sarah mentioned an interest in revised student loan policy. “If they switch around loan payments so you can pay it off faster, that’s the main goal.” When asked if either of them had found one party’s approach to the education issue more appealing than the other, Shania voiced both of their opinions. “I’m not sure what side I’ll support; they both have benefits. I think I more support the Danielle Smith policy. I’m not convinced that the [NDP] freezing policy would be long-term, especially as inflation goes up.” Regarding the “backdoor fees” that are added onto University tuition, Sarah appreciated both parties’ restrictive stance on it: “Knowing exactly where your money is going to is kind of important.” And so, while neither of them came out of the event with a concrete idea of who should be the next leader of the province, both felt it was a valuable use of a Thursday night. They expressed thanks to the Students’ Union for hosting the event, and then Shania ended, "I'm glad that we attended. It broadened my mind to certain topics in our province.” I think you could count that as a bipartisan success.

— 13


the

BALLAD of TOMMY LU (IN MANY TWEETS) DR. JAY GAMBLE

I You think Luckaszack is just a hack, knows nought of PSE? Well, here’s a song to prove you wrong, so let the praise run free! “We’ll give you cash and in a flash,” said our Tommy, running. He really meant, “The money’s spent, sorry ‘bout your funding.” “I am can-do,” said Tommy Lu when up against Wild Rose. Then he got in, stifled a grin, “I’ve got some schools to close.” We cheered, of course, without remorse: who needs education? Students will learn, after this burn, ‘bout this politician. Why do they read when what we need is good ol’ worker drones? We need drillers, pillow fillers, and people to answer phones. He did besmirch the pure research of profs who might think lots. What’s the use of a lab recluse if we can’t sell robots? “I decide what’s taught (before I’m caught punching above my weight),” Said Tommy Lu to his mighty crew, unaware of their fate. If truth be told, our hero bold unsheathed his battle axe: he slashed and hacked, laughed and smacked, “We always refuse to tax!” He fixed his hair, said with a glare, “we just require prudence.” Though jobs were lost, “Despite the cost, I support our students.” To those who balked, Tommy had talked: “This is gonna hurta.” Though students cried, Tommy replied, “I’m burning Alberta.”


FEATURES

II: CENTRALIZING BUNGALOO

III: INSTITUTE OF MYSTERY

Open your ear, and open a beer; I’ve got a tale for you. Here’s a story that sings the glory Of the hero Tom Lu.

“I am can-do,” said Tommy Lu (some even whispered, “liar!”) But he got in, stifled a grin: “I’ve got some profs to fire.”

Tom takes his post: the students toast; The profs all think he’s cool. He’s on their side against the tide Of this bitumen tool.

The budget dropped; the schools were stopped from having half a chance. Here’s Tommy’s line: “Now don’t you whine, We’ll cut to excellence!”

The budget fell, became a hell For those who like Tom Lu. He yelled, “Surprise! I’m Enterprise! Deputy Premier, too!”

“I’ve got some news!” said Tommy Lu, “We’ll add another school. An institute of great repute!” They screamed, “You bloody fool!”

At this dual role, some eyes do roll, Say it’s a lot to heft. Tom will not shirk; it’s hardly work When there’s nothing left.

He laughed, said, “Yup. But listen up, Your research you can share. And this is fun: it will be run By CEOs--that’s fair!”

He stands tall, cutting it all, Much to the schools’ dismay: “I take it back! Some I’ll sack; Some programs shout, ‘Mayday!’”

“The Institute, it will make the loot We so sorrily need.” Students said, “No!” Profs said, “Whoa! You are making us bleed.”

But Tom’s not done; he’s having fun Torturing all students. He preens his mane, says with disdain, “I’ll stop that impudence!”

Said to his face, “Where is this place? And we already share!” And came the shout, “Get business out!” Tom Lu just brushed his hair.

To Tommy Lu, students said, “You Promised autonomy!” Into the mic, Tom spit with spite, “In this economy?”

Tom wanted to flee: “Where it will be, I have no real idea. When I find out, I will no doubt, Tell you some time. See ‘ya!”

Despite their size, he’ll centralize All of our many schools. “It’s well and fine for some to whine; we know they’re silly fools.” “Go take a hike; it’s no Third Reich– it’s what I have to do.” He leaves, stage left; they’re all bereft because of Tommy Lu. But don’t be sad for this ballad Of Lucky Tommy Lu. Please don’t be sore; I’ll add some more, But here must end Part Two.

And now, today, the U of A has asked some profs to leave. “But they weren’t fired; they just retired!” Said our Tommy, starting to weave. “Tuition I’ll freeze!” (not other fees) “I do it for their sakes.” Though students cried, Tommy replied, “Who pissed in your CornFlakes?” At Tommy Lu, they threw a shoe; he dodged and weaved and ducked. They’re just so proud; they shout so loud, “Our schools are truly . . . in a whole lot of trouble.”

— 15


G N I N TLE

T T O H B A G I IN L TRAVIS ROBINSON

There isn’t a scene quite comparable to that of a Pronghorns swimming warm-up. The once-languid waters of the pool are transformed into a veritable frenzy of fins, boards, kicks, and splashes as the entire swim team incongruously squeezes into the Olympic-sized venue at the Max Bell Aquatic Centre. The outside lanes are reserved for sprinters completing their cool-down; the inside lanes are occupied by those longer-distance swimmers who get a few laps in before practice officially commences.


SPORTS

As I observe the flurry of activity that is the Pronghorns’ warm-up, I notice one very smooth swimmer in the inner half of the pool. His stroke is confident without being flashy, his body moving through the water with seal-like fluidity. His focus is nonpareil, as he virtually ignores those around him while completing his warm-up laps. His name is Kurt Carolus, and he is the next big thing for the Pronghorns, and possibly Canadian, swimming. The butterfly stroke is considered by many swimming aficionados to be the most challenging stroke in the swimming sphere, both in terms of technique and stamina. Athletes must propel themselves in a manner distinctly inhuman, with their shoulders and arms bobbing in and out of the water, doing most of the work. The legs compliment the circular motion of the arms, fanning much like the tail of a dolphin to maintain speed. Watching a good “fly” athlete swim reminds one of a hummingbird in flight: the arms move maniacally in turbine fashion, but the rest of the body is static, almost effortless as compared to those feverish but controlled limbs. The physical profile of a great fly athlete, then, is complimentary to that of their stroke. The best fly athletes have astoundingly developed shoulders, trapezius muscles like great cords across the back, and cape-like lats (large muscles down the back) more becoming of a bodybuilder than a high-intensity swimmer. Height is an important factor to any swimmer, but for fly athletes, it aids in making those revolutions of the arm longer, thereby reducing the time it takes to cross the pool. The butterfly stroke is reserved for those athletes well-adapted to competitive swimming, as it is the infant stroke of the bunch and the most reliant on equilibrium of technique and skill. Kurt Carolus, however, is not the physical freak of nature one would expect from an up-and-coming fly star. Admittedly smaller than the rest of his competition, Kurt is in good shape but by no means a specimen of international swimming. What he lacks in physique, however, he makes up for in work ethic. Kurt is relatively new to the stroke, having only started when he was a 14-year-old competing in South Africa. Now 19, he has matured remarkably quickly in the challenging stroke to capture the attention of coaches and fellow athletes in both South Africa and

Canada. His story, however, is perhaps even more remarkable than that of his rapid rise to success in the fly. Kurt was thrust into swimming at a young age because, ironically enough, of his inability to swim. “I almost drowned when I went on holidays as a kid, and so my mom decided to take us to swimming lessons,” says Kurt. This almost tragic event occurred in his native South Africa, where Kurt grew up surrounded by footballers, cricketers, and rugby stars competing in the lifeblood of South African sport. Kurt and his sister began swimming after that near-drowning experience, but it was only at an outdoor meet which coincided with some inclement weather that Kurt realized his potential to compete at an international level. “I swam age groups in South Africa in an open [outdoor] pool, and it was storming that day with lightning, and I swam way faster,” recounts Kurt about the day in which the lightning propelled him to his best finish to date. “After that day, I always swam fast.” If the lightning was the elixir to the unlocking of his potential, his third big meet at the Senior African Games was the day Kurt displayed this top-level ability. This competition is a multi-national event where athletes from across the continent compete for continental supremacy. Kurt swam well, and it instilled the confidence in him to keep competing at a high level. “It was a good experience,” he says humbly of his participation in these games. Clearly, it was the boost of confidence he needed to look elsewhere in the swimming world to find greater competition. Kurt immigrated to Saskatoon shortly after the African Senior Games to follow his father, and he has been tearing up the Canadian standings and grabbing the attention of collegiate recruiters ever since. The highest bidder for the university affections of Kurt was Horns swim coach Peter Schori, who saw CIS (Canadian Interuniversity Sport) potential in the already decorated Kurt. On having been recruited, Kurt simply states that “it’s nice knowing that people notice you.” This notice came primarily after Kurt won the 200-metre fly event at the 2012 Western Canada Championships, and participated at both the Canadian and South African Olympic trials for the London Games. “I’m not near Olympic level yet,” says Kurt,

“but I’d like to be there one day.” The magic number is six seconds, the passage of time that separates Kurt from the best in the world at the 200 metres distance. His stiffest competition once he reaches that mark will probably come from fellow South African countryman and world-record holder Chad Le Clos, an Olympic gold medalist in the 200 fly in London, and a rare defeater of the legendary Michael Phelps. Kurt, however, is more focussed on “breaking the two minute barrier this year” than he is with defeating the best on the planet. His time of 2:01 is extremely quick for a man of his age, but Kurt describes this time as “just in the middle of being fast.” The elusive two minute mark will probably fall during the CIS swim season this year, and whatever Kurt can do beyond that is just a testament to his talent. The university swimming environment is critical to any athlete wishing to develop into a world class talent in this country, and Kurt does not take the fact that he is a blue chip recruit for granted. “It’s a better atmosphere (at the University),” says Kurt. “It’s friendly competition.” Although swimming may be an individual sport, Kurt is aware of the fact that he is a member of a cohesive unit competing as one in the university standing. “The better you do, the better the team does,” says Kurt in effectively summarizing the team aspect of collegiate swimming. This understanding of what it means to be a collegiate athlete is a great asset to have for any athlete, but for a top recruit like Kurt, it is that intangible dimension that makes him a great competitor. “It’s just hard work for me,” Kurt says, referencing the fact that his natural ability is not the sole force behind his success. The humorous anecdotes of his near-drowning experience and his almost mythical lighting inspiration are testament enough that Kurt may not be the most naturally-gifted swimmer, but his work ethic exceeds many levels that natural ability may bring. In regards to his career aspirations in swimming, Kurt states that “I’d love to compete on a more international level, to represent one of my countries.” Having already detailed his swimming résumé with titles on the national level, catching Kurt Carolus in the near future may be like catching lightning in a bottle.

— 19


INK’D #ulethtattoos MEREDITH PRITCHARD KJEL ERICKSON

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Everyone knows someone with a tattoo. Maybe it’s a little Chinese character that they got in their twenties, or a huge back piece that took some time and money to create. Tattoos are beautiful pieces of art that follow the ebb and flow of your body and change with you over time. We see tattoos all over the world; some have them done for traditional reasons, others because the look of koi fish is appealing. Tattoos are a beautiful art-form that is rapidly gaining popularity in North America, especially with younger generations. Each tattoo has a different story – and we want to know what that story is. Every month, the Meliorist will compile and publish some of the most interesting tattoos seen around campus, including the stories behind them. If you think you have a great tattoo, email ae.editor@themeliorist.ca or tweet @mereyrose #ulethtattoos


ARTs + ENTERTAINMENT

1. Ashton Healy, Jaded (Lethbridge) 2. Chad Patterson, Artist: Craig Fenrick, Pendulum (Saskatoon) 3. Tadd, (Thailand) 4. Spencer MacDonald, Artist: Chris Rhyason, Sterling Skull (Grand Prairie) 5. Meredith Pritchard, Artist: Corson Hayes (Canmore) 6. Cindy Baker, Artist: Garrett, Blackbird Electric (Calgary)

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7. Chad Patterson, Artist: Dan Cameron, Deadly (Calgary)

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— 21


Don’t Be That Guy: A 10-STEP GUIDE TO TALKING ABOUT MOVIES — MAE BEST

HAVE YOU EVER GONE TO SEE A MOVIE WITH A FRIEND? YOU PROBABLY HAVE (UNLESS YOU DON'T HAVE FRIENDS – IN WHICH CASE, EITHER GOOD FOR YOU, OR I'M SORRY). AFTERWARDS, HAVE YOU TRIED TO HAVE A CONVERSATION ABOUT WHAT YOU THOUGHT ABOUT SAID MOVIE ONLY TO CONTINUOUSLY UTTER THE PHRASE, “YEAH, IT WAS GOOD,” OVER AND OVER WHILE YOUR FRIEND PRATTLES ON, USING FANCY WORDS LIKE “MISE-EN-SCENE” AND “VERISIMILITUDE?” DO YOU LIE AWAKE AT NIGHT REPLAYING THAT CONVERSATION AGAIN AND AGAIN, WISHING THAT YOU COULD COME AT IT WITH AN ARTICULATE AND WELL-BACKED RESPONSE TO WIPE THAT SMUG LOOK OFF YOUR FRIEND’S BIG, DUMB POOPY-FACE? WELL, HOPEFULLY I CAN HELP WITH THAT.

— 22


ARTs + ENTERTAINMENT

1) First off, maybe remove “big, dumb poopy-face” from your list of insults This is university, not second grade. Try “snollygoster” and watch your adversary's face go from shock to utter confusion as they try to picture exactly what a “snollygoster” is. 2) If you haven't taken Dr. Aaron Taylor's class, Introduction to Film Studies, do it I know it’s a four hour class, but honestly, it’s extremely helpful. Dr. Taylor is a great professor who not only knows what he's talking about, but also how to teach (which is not as common as you’d think). Also, class with him is kind of like being in class with Ellen DeGeneres. Those who've taken the class already will know what I'm talking about. 3) Acting is a big part of film, but it is not the only part Next time you sit down to watch a movie (or stand, or dance, or whatever – I don't know what you do when you watch movies), pay attention to what the camera is doing: where it’s moving, how it's moving, how long it takes to move, etc. Look at the way it’s edited, particularly the length of the shots and what order they appear. Watch the background instead of the foreground. The beauty of film is that there is a tonne of information being thrown at you from every angle the film-makers could think of, so pay attention. The devil is in the details. 4) First impressions are important, but Please, watch a movie more than once before you start trying to bang out an in-depth analysis. When I took Introduction to Film Studies, I wrote my final paper on Black Swan and I swear I watched that movie 30 times in a week and a half. Guess who got an A? SPOILER: it was me. Seriously though, if you really want to sound like a smarty-pants, watch the movie over and over, and each time focus on a different aspect. You will be surprised at how much more you will understand the film. 5) Don't rely too heavily on the Internet The Internet is simultaneously the most helpful resource and the most harmful. While there are a few exceptions, most people on the Internet spew out 500 words without any real thought for the sake of a few re-posts. When you are reading other people's reviews, keep in mind they have some sort of bias – like being madly in love with the lead actor/actress, having a passion for the subject matter, or on the flip side, wanting the director to die a slow, horrible death by paperclip or something. Passion is an admirable quality, but don't let it blind you. 6) Let people surprise you For example, most people who have never seen Kristen Stewart in anything besides The Twilight Saga have written her off and purposefully avoided her films. That is really unfair, and I'm sure many of you who have seen The Runaways will agree with me. Love or hate K-Stew, my point is that you shouldn't judge someone based on one example of their work. Everyone had reservations about Heath Ledger playing the Joker, and he gave arguably one of the most stirring performances in the last decade. There is something called growth. It’s a real thing, I promise you.

7) Be open minded Don’t do yourself the disservice of coming into a movie for the first time having already decided that you're going to love it, hate it, or that you know what it means. Don't read reviews and don't listen to other people’s abridged versions of the plot in which they badly re-enact key plot elements. I know it’s tempting, but honestly, movies are so much better the first time when you know almost nothing about them. Use that big, fancy, university-educated brain of yours and make your own meaning. Then go forth and read other people's opinions and argue with them over the Internet until your eyes bleed. 8) There is a difference between enjoying a film, and a film actually being 'good' 'Good' films are ones in which all the elements work together to convey a message or raise important questions. Hint: there's a reason why most Hollywood blockbusters are not nominated for Oscars. For example, I could watch The Mummy over and over again until I inevitably die of morbid obesity and infected bedsores, but is it a particularly good film? That’s debatable. It’s not really trying to say anything more than what is actually happening on screen (read: its explicit meaning). It is simply a ridiculously entertaining and romanticised adventure flick. Also, Rachel Weisz. 9) Back Your Arguments Up This one should be a given. Don't just say a movie was bad, or that it totally represents one thing. Why? How do you know? Give concrete examples from the film, or it’s going to look like you’re making up things to look like you know what you’re talking about. Pro-tip: it doesn't make you look like you know what you're talking about; it makes you look ridiculous. 10) It is OK to be wrong This is probably the most important tip. Our generation has a huge pride issue, but sometimes being wrong is just as important as being right. This is how we learn, grow, and all that after-school-special type stuff. Sooner or later, you're going to come across someone who has a better point than you and in your brain you're going to think, “They are so totally right, but I must not admit defeat lest I look weak. Quick! Call them names.” Don't let your brain do that. Instead, try saying, “Wow! Gosh-golly gee! I never thought of it like that.” You will learn more and make friends. On top of that, you can take the new idea you've just learned and blow other people’s minds with it. Who's the smarty-pants now? In summary: don't be that guy – the guy who sits there stubbornly saying, “But Megan Fox is so hot, and also, giant robots.” Nobody likes that guy. Nobody takes that guy seriously. Now, go forth and annoy people with your newfound movie-buffness.

— 23


TLFs

Hey Lethbridge! Witness the fitness baby!

If you are sitting in uhall by an outlet and are not using it- and are surrounded by open tables, please move. Sincerely; - Has more homework then my battery can handle.

To the people in the library who sit at a desk with a computer but aren’t using it. Could we please leave the computers open to those who need them?

Is it just me or does it seem like there are WAY more students than last year. -feeling like a sardine

Joining Kappa Sigma was something that changed my entire university experience. And the only regret I have is not joining earlier. There is nothing quite like it. ~ Royal Adkin

Hey! I’m talking to all of you! Stop packing up early. Class ends at a scheduled time, not 5 mins before that time. It’s disrespectful to the Prof and those who are here to learn.

“Who are you? How’d you get in here?” “I’m a locksmith, and I’m a locksmith.”

To Greg Patenaude, You rock! Sincerely, every Organic Chemistry Student ever

Hiroba/tivoli staff: You always give the best customer service. So thankful for you guys! Keep up the great work!

Hey UOL university mates, looking for some friends to spend good time, any one interested !

In search of Frusciante-esque Musician Type. Must be able to kick a hole in the sky. I’ll be your Dani California if you be my Sir Psycho Sexy! (We won’t tell Anthony.)

Hey any steampunk fans out there? looks fun and i wanna get into it

I would be interested in photographing steampunk fans and models, e-mail me at karl.johnston@uleth.ca

What’s the difference between a tune, a piano, and glue? You can tuna piano but you can’t piano a tuna… As for the glue, well I thought you’d get stuck on that.

If you steal from one author it’s plagiarism, but if you steal from many authors then it’s research.

Who do I have to blow to get a crossword?

Joe from Tims you are the best person ever. I strive to live my life like you because you are always positive no matter what. Keep it up and thanks for the coffee!!!

Big thumbs down to all the smokers lighting up outside the Markin south doors. Take a lesson in what that cigarette with the red circle and slash over it means. Boo! cough, hack…

DEAR JOE FROM TIM HORTONS please come back to the PE building!! We all miss the extra love you put into every order

To super-awesome Katie now working at Starbucks, all of us at Markin Hall miss your big smile and great service! Aramark, you need to train all your people in Katie-ness.

To the person who hit the deer on Valley Road, how are you driving fast enough on that road that you couldn’t avoid the deer on it?

Any MMA clubs on campus? I am looking for sparring partners, not afraid. 265 lb African Male Style: Muay Thai/Catch Wrestling Record: 44-0 . 40 Knockouts, 4 technical submission

What does being an “African Male” have to do with your fighting prowess?

To that sups fab blondie. Gurl. You werk it. #yougoglencoco

Cheers to urban market having a variety! I’m all for subway but it’s nice to be able to switch it up

Dear First Years: May your pants be tighter than your wallets – particularly if you’re a guy. We expect a better performance than last time. See you at Tight & Bright.

From the Starbucks Guys: which one of us is fetching?


TLFs

The new Vintage TLFs section is interesting but I seriously can’t tell the difference between the vintage and the modern! The more things change, the more they stay the same.

If you see a Unviersity of Lethbridge Trolls Rugby women’s player congratulate them on an amazing tournament in Idaho!! Took home 3rd place with only one loss. Big things coming.

MWAHAHAHA! Soon, the entire university will fall under the control of me and my purple dog! First here, then the world! MWAHAHAHAHA!

What’s the best thing about being a 5th year? Knowing where all the quiet bathrooms are so you can poop in peace.

Bud you couldn’t wheel a tire down a hill

Wanted: Good capitilistic poetry to replace bad socialist poetry. Apply with portfolio within. - Oct. 27th, 1989

Confucius says that staff meetings are always approximately twice as long as they need to be. - Nov. 9th, 1989

Lost: One night’s sleep. P.S. Thanks T.O. It was great!! - Oct. 27th, 1989

House keepers required. These Saturday night parties add too much to my course load. Experience with guinea pigs necessary. - Nov. 9th, 1989

Help! I’m being held prisoner inside of a newspaper office - Oct. 27th, 1989

Does the Hunter seek the Sky, or can Horizons shine for both - Nov. 9th, 1989

Dominique; don’t be blinded by fanaticism. Other people have valid opinions too. - Nov. 9th, 1989

Confucious: him say, Foolish girl shoot horse in barn, drag horse out. Wise girl open door walk horse out. Wisest girl not put horse in barn. - Nov. 23rd, 1989

TO ED: IT’S OVER. COME GET YOUR LAUNDRY. - Nov. 30th, 1989

Seeking a single, attractive, slim female to teach me how to use a PC. Leave name & num in TLF. - Nov. 30th, 1989

ever teach you any etiquette? Some peoples kids!! - Nov. 30th, 1989

It is quite ironic that psychology majors are the people who are the most insensitive! - Dec 7th, 1989

The guy who said a bird in hand is worth 2 in the bush ain’t been puttin’ his bird in the right bush - Dec. 7th, 1989


WHY MUNICIPAL ELECTIONS MATTER SEAN GLYDON VP External If you’ve been paying attention to the local news, or if you have left your house at all in the last few weeks, you probably can’t help but notice the unmistakeable signs of a municipal election kicking into high gear around this fair and windy city of ours. Swell. Why should you care? Although municipal politics may not hold the star power that other levels of democratic governance do (I’m looking at you, Justin Trudeau and your hair), it is actually the level of government that most affects your day-to-day life. Obviously, there are exceptions, such as the recent cuts to post-secondary institutions across Alberta. But by and large, things like transit, snow removal, and property taxes are far more noticeable on a daily basis by everyone, including students. ULSU President Shuna Talbot and I have met with a number of candidates and have lobbied them on issues which most affect our students, such as transit, property taxes on university residences, and the development of the west side. Recognizing that the ULSU has attempted (and failed) in the past to implement a “UPass” that would grant students subsidized access to the transit system, we decided to tackle the problem from a different angle. We partnered with the Lethbridge College Students’ Association to lobby the city to put pressure on LA Transit to improve the transit system, as we have both heard horror stories from our respective student bodies concerning the impotency of the Lethbridge transit system. Our goal is to see a meaningful investment in transit improvements and to

pursue a UPass for both university and college students, with an opt out option for those who hold parking passes. Another pressing issue is the fact that Alberta is the only province that charges property taxes on post-secondary residences. This issue lays in a particularly murky gray area due to the dual provincial/municipal nature of it. However, in Lethbridge, the city periodically attempts to increase taxes on the residences.

money and resources are wasted reaching the same stalemate over and over again. As a students’ union, we would much rather see the money spent go towards more serious concerns, such as the deferred maintenance on some of our residence buildings that desperately need it. It will also save the city money to do things like invest in transit. So, how are you going to get informed? Luckily, there are several ways. The city is

holding a number of forums for both councillor and mayoral candidates during the election period. These can be easily found on the City of Lethbridge website under “Elections.” In fact, two of the forums will be held in the Uhall Atrium,candidates and the second on Oct. 18 at 12:15p.m. for councillor candidates. Furthermore, we have contacted all candidates and asked for a synopsis of their platform points that affectstudents. All submissions that we receive by the end of this week will be put on display, making candidate platforms highly accessible and relevant to the student body. The one piece of advice that I can give you (without endangering my non-partisan stance) is to critically assess every candidate that is running. There are some that are only paying lip service to the needs of students, some that are downright antagonistic towards those needs, and some that truly care about the students that make this city so vibrant. Just remember, there are over 12,000 post-secondary students in this city and only 24,000 people voted in the last municipal election. If you don’t think that you have any power to affect change, think again. A concerted majority of students voting has the potential to decide who the next city council is. So get out there, inform yourself, decide what you want, and I will see you at the polls this Oct.21.


WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW:

WHERE DO MY STUDENT FEES GO? SHUNA TALBOT President Have you ever asked yourself, “Why does my education cost so much?” If so, and if you have not reviewed your fee breakdown on The Bridge on uleth.ca, I recommend that you check it out. tuition and a list of other fees, which we refer to as mandatory non-instructional fees. Any student fees that the Students’ Union, CKXU, LPIRG, or the Women’s Centre charges are regulated by student referendum. This means that as a student, you have the opportunity to decide whether these fees are of value to you. This transparency is deliberate because it shows that students have approved the fees. Unfortunately, not all mandatory non-instructional fees are regulated this way. There are several fees that are dictated by the university. For example, there are often additional charges that your program may require based on instrumental costs, travel costs, and so on.

Another one of these fees is the student services fee. This fee is set by the university in order to cover a variety of service costs, including the registrar and security services. Many of these timately end up supplementing the operating costs of the university. Following the recent provincial budget cuts to the post-secondary sector the University of Lethbridge was forced to increase our student service fee 300 per cent. The cost went from $12.50 per course, to a whopping $37.50 per course. In this situation the university had few options to cuts, even after the province promised that students would not have to cover these costs. In the future, fees will continue to increase above the consumer price index due to the sigThis makes us in the Students’ Union wonder if the province will step in with regulation, or if these fees will continue to increase, eventually tripling or quadrupling the cost of tuition? We are also curious as to what will happen if funding to the university is restored. Would addi-

tional funding prevent our mandatory fees from continuing to increase? Would our student fees be lowered? Would the increase go towards additional student services? Or would funding go towards improving other areas of the university, such as programming? advocate against these fees. We are given the opportunity to discuss these fees with the institution during the process, but there is no approval mechanism in place at this time. One way we can ensure that we are heard is by discussing our concerns through different forms of media, and I encourage every student on campus to voice their concerns regarding these unpredictable increases. Our goal in the Students’ Union is to ensure that these fees are regulated this fall when the post-secondary learning act is opened. In order for us to be successful, we need to hear your concerns. Please don’t hesitate to contact us with stories of debt, concerns regarding fees, or even just general frustration. Our door is always open.


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PUZZLES

8

— 30

3 1 6

6 1

1 5 6

7

3 9

2

4

complete a ‘straight’. A straight is a set of numbers with no gaps but can be in any order, eg [4,2,3,5]. Clues in black cells remove that number as an option in that row and column, and are not part of any straight. Glance at the solution to see how ‘straights’ are formed.

9

6

6 4

3

www.str8ts.com

How to beat Str8ts – Like Sudoku, no single number can repeat in any row or column. But... rows and columns are divided by black squares into compartments. These

board by entering numbers 1 to 9 such that each row, column and 3x3 box contains every number uniquely. For many strategies, hints and tips, visit www.sudokuwiki.org If you like Str8ts check out our books, iPhone/iPad Apps and much more on our store.

No. 145

6

2 5 4

5 9 6 4 5 9 1 8 2 4

Tough

3

1 2 8 7 7 8 1 9 1 2 4

The solutions will be published here in the next issue.

© 2011 Syndicated Puzzles, Inc.

2

Easy

© 2011 Syndicated Puzzles, Inc.

No. 145


CES JOB LISTINGS WELCOME BACK EVERYONE! Let us introduce you to CES (Career & Employment Services). CES is a student service office dedicated to assisting you with your Career and Job Search needs. Weʼre within the Career Co-op Services Office in AH154, along with Applied Studies and the Management and Arts & Science Cooperative Education programs. CCS office hours are 9 a.m. - 12 p.m. and 1 p.m. - 4 p.m. Monday - Friday. Workshops for October:

To see full workshop schedule and sign up go online to uleth.ca/ross/ces/workshops. •CES career exploration workshops Wednesday, Oct. 16, 3:00 p.m. – 4:30 p.m. Friday, Oct. 25, 11:30 a.m. – 1:00 p.m. Monday, Oct. 28, 2:00 p.m. – 3:30 p.m. •CES job search & networking workshops Monday, Oct. 21, 3:30 p.m. – 5:00 p.m.

Some of our services include:

• CAREER ADVISING – whether you are in your first year or about to graduate, if you are wondering what you can do with your major, if your career path is the right one for you, or how to go about finding a job, come in to make an appointment with a Career Advisor! • CES JOB BOARD! – access part-time, summer, full-time, international and volunteer opportunities! Check postings 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, from the comfort of your own home or elsewhere on campus. For more information and how to access the site go to our website or come in to our office in AH154. All of the positions listed below can be found on CES Job Board. www.uleth.ca/ross/ces/job-board • JOB SEARCH STRATEGIES – do you have questions on resumes or interviews? We have handouts for you or drop by to sign up for a workshop • CAREER & EMPLOYER INFORMATION SESSIONS – watch for upcoming career events and information session dates. Sessions start as early as Sep 10. • CAREER INFORMATION – we have employer information, website lists, info on professional entrance exams (e.g. LSAT, MCAT, DAT, GRE) and an array of career planning information

Information sessions on campus:

Tuesday, Oct. 29, 1:30 p.m. – 3:00 p.m. •CES interview techniques workshops Wednesday, Oct. 9, 1:00 p.m. – 3:00 p.m. Tuesday, Oct. 15, 11:00 a.m. – 1:00 p.m. •CES resume & cover letter workshops Thursday, Oct. 3, 11:00 a.m. – 1:00 p.m. Monday, Oct. 7, 1:00 p.m. – 3:00 p.m. Friday, Oct. 18, 1:00 p.m. – 3:00 p.m. Wednesday, Oct. 23, 11:00 a.m. – 1:00 p.m

Please sign up online at uleth.ca/ross/ces/events to receive times and locations. • RCMP – Thursday, Oct. 10 • JET Programme (Japan Internships) – Thursday, Oct. 10

Go to our website for more detailed information on our services: uleth.ca/ross/ces For details of the postings and information on the application processes go to uleth.ca/ross/ces/job-board

October 3 - 10

3 4

L.A. BEAT LISTINGS labeat.ca

Nick Gilder and Sweeny Todd

Karen Romanchuk with Pete Watson

James Oldenburg

Dale Ketcheson

Mocha Cabana Jazz

The Slice Pop

Mic at Bo Diddlyʼs 8 Open Bo Diddlyʻs Pub and Grill

Mocha Cabana Jazz

Rock

Lethbridge Folk Club Bluegrass Jam

Wheeler Dealer

Kalle Mattson

The Steel Wheels

Lethbridge C Folk Club presents Dr. Zoo

Open Mic at the Slice

Wolf's Den Folk

Lethbridge Casino Rock

Open Mic at Jimmyʼs

Cancer Bats with Bat Sabbath

Jimmyʼs Pub Rock

Average Joes Downtown Metal

Elliott Brood

Mormon Girls, Lustre Creame, Ruby Plumes

The Slice Folk

Granite Force with Last Caskett and Unzipped Bo Diddlyʻs Pub and Grill Metal

The Slice Rock

6

Open Jam at Studio 54

Jazz

The Soujourners Geomatic Attic Folk

Crash Karma with One Bad Son

Studio 54 Rock

James Oldenburg with Paul Holden Streatside Eatery

Owl Acoustic Lounge Folk

Moose Hall World/Reggae

Geomatic Attic Folk

5

Boreal Sons CD Release Party

Galt Museum Country

Lethbridge Casino Rock

Average Joes Downtown Rock

7

Open Mic at Owl Acoustic Lounge Owl Acoustic Lounge Folk

The Slice Rock

Beat Open Jam 9 L.A. Owl Acoustic Lounge Rock

Jazz Jam with HBO3 The Slice Jazz

10

Rae Spoon

Owl Acoustic Lounge Alternative

Andrew Allen

Inferno Nightclub R&B/Soul

Chronobot with Lustre Creame and Dirt

The Slice Metal



The Meliorist, Volume 47 Issue 4