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For the week of Thursday, March 8 • Volume 45, Issue 23

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your independent student newspaper


Campus beat

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March 8, 2012 • 2

Janet Barriage Campus Reporter For more information on contributing to Campus Beat, please contact Janet Barriage, campus.beat@themeliorist.ca

What’s happening If you want to see your event posted in the “Beat,” please contact campus.beat@themeliorist.ca for more information. Events must be submitted by Friday evening to appear in the following issue of the Meliorist. ULSU Elections: Voting Closes at 3 p.m. March 9 USLU presents: The Dudes, Lustre Creame, and The Bradford Whites. March 9 7 p.m. in The Zoo Not only is there going to be amazing live music for free! But the ULSU General Election results will also be announced (at 5 p.m.)! 2012 Student Speaker Challenge – Final Session March 13 7 p.m. to 9 p.m. in Andy’s Place This is it people – the final showdown. Be there to watch it all go down. 5 Days for the Homeless March 11 – 16 In front of the Students’ Union Building, across from the bus loop Brave students spend a week outdoors from Sunday evening on March 11 to Friday, March 16 to raise funds for Woods Homes, a local organization that supports youth at risk in the community. This year the courageous (and soon-to-be smelly) students are Eric Stemberger, Emma Ladoucer, Jesse Zimmer, Michael Willems and Rita St. Gelais. The fundraising goal is $15,000. Donations can be accepted in person or online at http://www.5days.ca. Dirty Bingo – St. Patrick’s Day Edition March 16 5:30 p.m. to 9 p.m. in The Zoo Bingo, sexy prizes, the best holiday ever? How could it get better? See you there! OUTspoken 2012 March 21 – 24 Around Lethbridge This is the largest annual event of its kind in Southern Alberta. The goal is to address a wide variety of LGBTTQA (lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans, two-spirit, queer and allies) topics. If you didn’t understand any of those words or if you identify with or just support this cause then this is the event for you! This four-day workshop and lecture series includes an evening of entertainment and a dance party. It is free to attend! 6th Annual U of L Film Festival March 24 8 p.m. in PE 250 This is a great chance to check out the amazing talent we have around the university. Tickets are $5 in advance and $7 at the door.

Orr takes first semi-finals

Student Speaker Challenge narrows the field Kelti Boissonneault Editor-in-Chief

Tuesday, Feb. 28 saw the first semi-finalists for the Student Speaker Challenge at the University of Lethbridge go head to head to tackle the question “Is there a systemic crisis in the world?” The competition has been going on around campus for the past several weeks, and is finally winding down with the last pair of semi-finalists squaring off yesterday, Wednesday, March 7, 2012. The finals will be held Tuesday, March 13, 2012 in Andy’s Place at 7 p.m. Last week’s semi-final round saw Michael Orr present on his thesis that the systemic crisis is caused by a system that focuses on adversarialism instead of working together. He believes that economics, culture, and relative gains can still be achieved without focussing on adversarial practices, and instead encourages cultures to be altruistic and help developing nations to succeed. Ingrained adversity between competing nations, cultures, factions, corporations, and governments has led to a scarcity issue and increased competition for resources and technologies. He believes that a more homogenous world-culture based in altruism would stem the systemic crisis. Orr was lambasted in the ques-

tion period with in-depth openended questions that left him stumbling and grasping to defend his thesis. Even the judges admitted that the questions were tough and rather open-ended. Up next was Leslie Mahoney, who emphasized that governmental influence in multiple tiers of political, societal, and economic interaction, meant that the only possible resolution to the current systemic crisis would be a system of interrelated checks and balances. Referencing the Orwellian dystopian society of 1984, Mahoney argued that the only move left before society becomes truly irreparable is to shift power from the elite back into the hands of the many: a true champion for democracy. Mahoney emphasized a policy of green trade and fair trade rather than free trade, and cited the “occupy” movement as evidence that the many are starting to get fed up with the elitist system. Mahoney seemed to handle question period slightly better than her opponent, though the judges did caution her that she began to argue against her own thesis. By the end, Michael Orr was declared the winner, and will progress to the final round to take place March 13. Congratulations to both contestants for well-thoughtout theories and excellent public speaking acumen.

Club Hub The Red Cross Club Janet Barriage Campus Beat

The Red Cross Club (RCC) is brand new to the campus this year but it isn’t new to the rest of Canada! You can find Red Cross campus clubs all across Canadian universities. The RCC is raising student and community awareness for what the International Red Cross and Red Crescent Movement does around the world to assist people suffering from disaster and conflict. The Canadian Red Cross is a leading humanitarian organization in which people voluntarily demonstrate their caring for others in need. Their mission is to improve the lives of vulnerable people by using the power of humanity. They believe in a world where all societies have equal status and share equal responsibilities and duties in helping each other.

This year, the RCC’s primary focus is getting established and raising funds for the crisis in the Horn of Africa, the largest humanitarian disaster to which the Red Cross has ever responded.  There will be various fundraising events around the community this academic year to raise money and awareness for this disaster. If you would like to find out more about this disaster or how you can get involved and help, the RCC meetings are held on a monthly basis on campus.  Anyone may become a member of the RCC. Being an undergraduate student at the U of L is the only requirement for an executive position.   They currently have 30 members and anyone interested in joining should e-mail the president of the RCC, Dave Elniski, at david.elniski@uleth.ca with their e-mail, name, and student ID number (if a student at the U of L).

Mike Orr

The Canadian Red Cross bases their actions upon their fundamental principles, which include the following:

Respect Dignity and care for one another Integrity

Accountability Effectiveness Transparency Voluntary service


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March 8, 2012 • 3

Hot on the Hill

Two scandals for Tories to worry over

D. Gordon, E. Robertson

Kelti Boissonneault Editor in Chief

The ominous omnibus For the past several months the omnibus crime bill, Bill C-10, as proposed by the Conservative government has been raising a stink on Capitol Hill in Ottawa. The bill, which primarily focuses on the creation and implementation of mandatory minimum sentences for various crimes, has struck a chord with politicians, news outlets, and various organizations from the Atlantic to the Pacific for its harsh conditions regarding what are commonly viewed as relatively minor offences. Critics of Bill C-10 point to other nations abandoning the path the bill would put Canada on, stating that the emphasis on punishment is ineffectual in dealing with relatively minor non-violent offences. To the south, states like Georgia and Texas, traditionally held to be states interested in harsh punishments, have already begun to negate similar legislation and move towards

preventative measures against crime such as education and social programming. In fact, U.S. law enforcement officials recently told Ottawa such tougher-sentencing laws were responsible for nearly bankrupting some major states. The Conservatives, however, are pursuing Bill C-10 with all the expediency they can muster, pushing the bill through with the minimal six changes required by the senate. Other parties are struggling to filibuster the bill, with loud voices in the opposition stating the provinces, which will be expected to assume the majority of cost for the increased number of incarcerations, cannot bear the financial burden the bill would cause given the current economy. Of particular interest to university-aged students are the legislative changes to drug use and enforcement laws, which include a minimum six-month jail sentence for any person apprehended in possession or use of marijuana in a public place where children have access. Critics claim that this

creates criminals out of harmless citizens and inappropriately targets relatively minor offences. A criminal record is nothing for the average citizen to jeer at, as criminal activity limits employment opportunity and the ability to travel to other nations. Bill C-10 was given final approval by the Senate in a 48-37 vote at about midnight last Friday. This means that the bill will become law. The Conservatives, who hold a majority in the Senate, limited debate on the bill to a mere six hours, the minimum amount of time a bill can be debated by the Senate, despite the length and number of topics the bill covers. Liberal senators opposing the bill were staunchly against first the limitation of the time to debate the bill, and a number of clauses within the act itself. Robots calling houses In addition to the omnibus crime bill, the Conservatives are coming under fire for robocalls during the recent election intended to mislead voters about the location and time

of their voting stations. These robotic phone calls have prompted over 31,000 complaints to Elections Canada, the investigating body of this latest Conservative scandal. While opposition MPs such as the Green Party, which has publicly released statements relating this latest of scandals to obvious evidence of the decline of Canada’s democratic system, and NDP MPs calling for a public investigation into a serious offence, the media is struggling to get a grip on just how extensive the robocall scandal is. More vocal representatives are calling the robocalls outright infractions against many Canadians’ civil rights to vote, stating that the calls could have significantly confused voters in order to prevent them from casting a vote. The ridings primarily affected spanned Canada from Victoria, BC to parts of Nova Scotia with a primary focus on major ridings in Ontario. Even Edmonton voters are reporting robocalls around election time, confusing potential voters as to the location of their voting station,

though none have been reported in Lethbridge so far. The scandal is accompanied by growing frustration as the case is handed off to be investigated by Elections Canada behind closed doors instead of by the RCMP or in a public arena. Voters can be sure answers will come, but critics are wondering how long those answers will take. In the meantime, several Conservative campaign personnel have been suspected of involvement with the scam, and at least one has stepped down due to these implications. The Meliorist would like to take this opportunity to post a correction to last week’s (Issue 22) Hot on the Hill in which it stated the cost over-runs for the long gun registry exceeded $90 million. In fact, the cost over-runs for the registry exceed several billion dollars, a full amount to be published in an upcoming article. We apologize for the confusion.

Canadian nursing exam to be produced by U.S. company

Nursing students oppose decision to use American standardized licensing exam Tannara Yelland

CUP Prairies & Northern Bureau Chief

SASKATOON (CUP) — Nursing students from across Canada have raised concerns as preparations are made to move to a U.S-produced standardized exam for licensing registered nurses, expected in 2015. “The main thing is that nursing students across the country, since this announcement, have been voicing a lot of discontent and [are] upset with the decision,” said Maggie Danko, western regional director of the Canadian Nursing Students’ Association and a third-year nursing student at the University of Alberta. On Dec. 1, most provincial nursing regulatory bodies in Canada announced that they had selected the National Council of State Boards of Nursing, an American company, to

create a new licensing exam for registered nurses. The regulatory bodies of Quebec and the Yukon have not signed on. The new exam will be written online rather than on paper, which will allow prospective nurses to write whenever they want and for a lower fee than the current Canadian Registered Nurses’ Exam costs. The CRNE can only be written on three days out of the year. These dates are chosen by the Canadian Nursing Association, which provides the CRNE. “We’re also concerned that this decision to switch to the American company has been made without proper consultation of some of the relevant stakeholders, such as students, who are the ones that write the exam,” Danko said. It’s true that students were not included in the selection process

for the new exam creator, says College and Association of Registered Nurses of Alberta CEO Mary-Anne Robinson. “This is a licensing exam and typically those decisions are made by the licensing bodies or the regulators,” she said. Robinson maintained that it is “not at all” standard practice to solicit input from those who will be taking such a test, and expressed surprise that the CNSA has opposed the change. “One of the considerations that the regulators had when we went out to an open bidding process for this exam was that we were looking for an exam that would improve accessibility for new graduates,” Robinson said. “So we thought that being able to write at their convenience… would be something that students would really appreciate.”

For Danko, however, convenience did not seem to be an important factor; rather, she was much more worried about the possible problems posed by an American company writing and profiting from the Canadian licensing exam for RNs. Danko listed several complaints she says nursing students have brought to her and her organization’s attention, including the fact that an American corporation will profit from Canadian students, a worry that students’ information will be available to American authorities and a lack of cultural sensitivity. “Some of our concerns as well are that as it’s a Canadian-developed exam, [the current exam creators] do consider the unique cultural needs of Canada in the drafting of the exam. They really focus a lot on cultural competency, and also the

bilingual aspect of our country, and not just simply translation between French and English.” Robinson was emphatic in her response to these concerns, saying that the licensing exam for new nurses is not intended to test for cultural differences. “Canadian culture is really made up of several subcultures,” she said, “as is the U.S. Clearly we can’t be creating an exam in either country that would bias one culture over another. “In fact, studies that have been done comparing the current Canadian RN exam to the current U.S. exam show that they’re 93.1 per cent similar, and the differences are only related to [differences in legislation]. That whole notion that it’s not sensitive to cultural differences is actually nothing to do with the exam


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news

Federal student summer job centres to close, move online Action is ‘removing investments in young people,’ say critics Lee Richardson

CUP Ontario Bureau Chief

TORONTO (CUP) — The federal government is closing job centres that help students find seasonal summer employment, shifting its services online to save $6.5 million a year. The offices, called Service Canada Centres for Youth, were open temporarily from May from August to offer job-finding advice and careerbuilding tips to youth aged 15-24. “The number of students visiting these sites has significantly decreased over the years, making them less effective and relevant for today’s youth,” said Alyson Queen, spokesperson for Human Resources and Skills Development Minister Diane Finley. ���Young Canadians have told us that they want to access more government services online, so as a result we are expanding our website with more resources to help them find employment.” While Finley announced on Jan. 27 that services were moving to the government’s youth employment site, there was no mention in that announcement that the centres would be closing. Diverse reaction has followed the announcement. “It doesn’t surprise me, because this government has shown its will-

Alderman is history

Lethbridge city council votes for title change for council members Kelti Boissonneault Editor-in-Chief

Members of city council voted unanimously last week to change the title of alderman to councillor or city councillor after the next election for all council positions except mayor. The city has come under fire recently for their use of the title alderman, which seems to promote a gender bias in those eligible to sit council seats. Other communities around southern Alberta have already embraced the change, including Coalhurst and Coaldale, where Alderman has not been in use for some years. The term alderman has been in use in Lethbridge since 1952. Before that, councillor and commissioner were both employed at one point to describe the position of city councillor. The move back to councillor from alderman has many people in Lethbridge pleased, as the term alderman has long been considered out of date and genderexclusive. The cost associated with changing the title should be negligible and the change will not take effect until after the next municipal election in 2014.

ingness to cut its expenses on the backs of the most vulnerable,” said Liberal MP for Papineau Justin Trudeau, the party’s critic for youth and post-secondary education. “Young people, unfortunately, are easy targets in that sense.” The centres provided career advice such as resume writing and interview techniques, and were stationed country-wide with about 100 in Ontario alone. “There might be a good reason to move important aspects of these job centres online, but the other side of it is you probably need, more than ever, good forms of training, coaching and development of skills ultimately to get around the labour market,” said McMaster University political science professor Peter Graefe. “All that is lost when we move things online.” The shift online comes at a time when unemployment among Canadian youth is 14.5 per cent, according to Statistics Canada — almost double the rate of unemployment in all Canadians. “We need to be ensuring that youth have access to jobs and that youth have access to services to find jobs,” said NDP post-secondary education critic and MP for Scarborough-Rouge River Rathika Sitsabaiesan. “We should be encouraging our youth to find better

employment, we should be providing that support, but we can’t.” Trudeau said that the issue has been brought up briefly in the House of Commons. “It came up at one point in question period and [the Conservatives’] answers have been about streamlining, offering the same quality of services, making better use of taxpayers’ dollars,” said Trudeau. “But this is not making better use of taxpayers’ dollars, this is removing investments in young people.” The federal Conservatives, however, are reiterating the fact that the summer job-finding services will still continue, being integrated into already existing Service Canada offices. “What we want to be clear about is students will continue to have access to in person service… at our Service Canada offices,” said Queen. “There is no longer the need for these seasonal temporary offices.” Also repeated by the federal government is the statement that more young people are going online. But according to Graefe, excluding those who cannot navigate the online job market could be problematic, and that while those who know how to move from the online job market to getting a job will do well, others who might not have access or experience with looking for jobs online could be

left behind. “There [are] problems that haven’t been thought of,” Graefe said, adding that if youth use other mainstream online job sites to find work, support for the traditional centres may not be enough for them to stay open. “It’s a government that’s looking to cut as much as possible, in places that they think people aren’t going to feel it, and let’s face it — youth aren’t going to come out for these employment centres,” he said.

Unemployment among Canadian youth is 14.5 per cent, according to Statistics Canada — almost double the rate of unemployment in all Canadians.


features

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March 8, 2012 • 5

Matt Baird Features Editor For more information on contributing to Features, please contact Matt Baird, f.editor@themeliorist.ca

Top 25 of the Next Top Ad Exec

Sitting down with two of the U of L’s marketing moguls Matt Baird

Features Editor

Canada’s Next Top Ad Exec, for those of you without a photographic memory for posters around campus, is a contest open to university students across the country with a simple premise: design a national advertizing campaign for the 2013 Chevrolet Spark. On Feb. 6, 31 teams were chosen out of a pool of nearly 200, and one of those teams was representing your University of Lethbridge: Jaelyn Birch and Jaren Baranyay. I spoke to the two earlier this week while they waited on news of whether or not they would be advancing to the next phase. “It’s been a great experience so far, and we haven’t even had the whole experience. If we can advance, it would be life changing.” The contest is split into three elimination phases, beginning with the elevator pitch. “In that phase we had a [projected] five million dollar budget, and with that money you have to choose how to market the Spark, and then how to pitch with this company.” With this five million dollars, contestants are tasked with creating the best ad campaign they can come up with, in order to prove to the judges that they deserve a place in the top 25. “Mostly, we have to figure out how to use that five million dollars to get the word out as far as possible.” “We had three main points,” says Jaelyn. “First: re-energize the Chevrolet app. We basically created an

app wherein you could tour your new car, customize the features, all that.” As well as providing crucial information about the car, the app provided information about both the sponsorship options the team had created in part two, as well as the cross-country promotional tour described as “a contest we held, using all the major urban centres. We were going to have a concert, as well as use 3D projection mapping on one of the sky rises downtown, make a killer event in order to raise awareness about the Spark.” Jaren nods, and picks up where Jaelyn leaves off. “The middle phase was sponsorship. We decided to give a million dollars to the War Arms organization, because not only do they promote safe driving, it’s also a good organization in general.” Yes, they were giving a fifth of their budget to charity. Somewhere, an ad exec is having a silent heart attack. “We did another sponsorship with Much and Coca-Cola, which would allow us to get coverage for the Spark, but these sponsors would also contribute to the concert.” “We’re actually waiting to see if we made it into the top 10. All of the top 10 applicants get flown down to Toronto for a weekend where you design a presentation to present the entire campaign idea before about 10 or so GM executives. They then narrow it down to the first, second, and third place. “First walks away with their own Chevy Sparks, second walks away with $2,500 each, and third walks away with $1,000 each, and a couple smaller prizes.” How-

ever nice it would be to get a brand new car, according to the team, the prize is really just the icing on the cake. “Getting there and winning is our main goal; that would be an absolutely unreal opportunity,” Jaren says, “but just the amount of material we’ve learned going through this journey has just been insane. I’ve learned more in the past three months about advertizing and marketing during this journey than I ever thought possible.” “It’s kind of funny; we’re actually not marketing majors,” they laugh at my look of surprise. “We’re actually fifth year new media majors, with marketing minors. We have more of a creative background, and so this competition has allowed us to use our creativity and apply the marketing knowledge. Because we don’t take as many marketing classes, we have learned so much during this competition.” In addition to the contest, the project the two have been developing will act as a major project for one of their classes. “We’ve been making submissions along the way to our prof, so right now it’s really just a waiting game. After that, we do have to present it to our class. We’re doing the project for the class, but we had the option of submitting it to this competition.” In doing so, they beat out over 100 teams. Not bad for an optional submission. When asked about the toughest part of the contest, Jaren thinks for a minute before replying: “developing the entire second part, coming up

with a marketing plan was really big; we had to be really precise, and really accurate. Lots of research and grammar and spelling checks.” Jaelyn nods noting that “because this is such a big competition, it’s so different than how I would approach a class project. Do your best, and then do better. Because we had three major pillars to this project, we had to try and condense, but still keep them interconnected.” That being said, the two didn’t go through it alone. “We’ve had a lot of help. Britney Miller, who went last year and made it to the top three. She’s been giving us a lot of guidance, as did Scott Booth and Caroline Smith. It’s been a real team effort on this, and because we don’t

Jaelyn Birch and Jaren Baranyay

have a background in marketing. It’s been a big help to have these people.” “Especially Britney. She’s been there, knows how to make it, and has been an angel on our shoulders. Big shout out to her.” The closing ceremonies, along with the final results, will be announced on March 27. Editors note: Post-interview, I received an email from Jaren. “Just received the word on the competition and unfortunately we did not get chosen for the top 10, but the entire experience was still very exciting and both Jaelyn and myself learned a lot!” Thanks to both Jaelyn and Jaren, and best of luck to the both of them.

Your VP Internal Affairs candidates, in their own words. Matt Baird

Features Editor

Editors note: Earlier this week, I contacted the candidates vying for the only executive position with any competition – VP Internal. They were asked to write 250 words directly to you, the voter, about what made them the best candidate for your vote. For those of you who have already voted, your dedication to the electoral process is shocking, but you were obviously informed in the first place. For the rest of you, take a gander, and then direct yourselves to www.uslu.ca to cast your vote.

Emma Ladouceur I’m hanging out with a couple friends, drinking wine, and avoiding homework. It occurred to me that I should probably write this before the paper goes to the print, so I asked the room what I should write to show readers how awesome I am. Best answer: “write ‘Emma’ 200 times.” Boom. Short of that, if you’ve gotten nothing else from my campaign this past week, I want you to know how much I love this school and the people in it. Though I never would have expected it coming in, I found a home and a family within these walls. Protective of my loved ones as I am, I have committed myself to making this school the best place it can be so that everybody might feel welcome and wanted. In my efforts, I have taken up with groups like LPIRG, the Women’s

Centre, and the PRIDE Centre among others. I have planned everything from small get-togethers to performances at packed parties to multiday lecture series. I have helped fund and facilitate student initiatives, and I have offered safe spaces to those who need them. I have thrown myself into life on this campus and am ready to move into a new arena. If you think I would be a fair representative and you’d care to grant me the opportunity, I would love to serve as your VP Internal Affairs. If I’m maybe not your first choice for the job, but you still think I sound all right, hit me up and we’ll grab some tea. Thank you, Emma

Erin Luchia I am Erin Luchia, a second year student with future goals in neuroscience marketing and culture research. For the past four years I have worked in the event organization and promotion industry, and am highly successful in selling out events. I feel it is too often that the ULSU hosts events that are (in my experience as a student here) based around drinking. Although this does help with the sense of a community, it does not accurately represent the student population. If elected, I plan to work with Pronghorn Athletics to organize events that the majority of the student body will want to attend. Event ideas include homecoming, pep rallies, fan buses, and tail gate

BBQs. Live music, food festivals, and incorporating the arts into events are also ideas I have. Events like these allow for students who do not drink or who are not drinking that weekend (for fear of the next day hangover affecting their studies) to participate and have a good time as well. Student life will in turn assist clubs. Clubs that participate in events hosted by the ULSU will become more visible. This could include, but is not limited to, a talent portion or lip sync beginning the pep rally concert. Visibility creates awareness among the student body, thus recruitment and retention will increase. For clubs to continue to grow and prosper, recruitment of quality members is important. I also want to increase club funding and travel/conference grants to accommodate the record number of clubs on campus. My goal is to make students happy, and that includes during exam seasons.

Shuna Talbot The VP Internal position is one of the toughest positions on the executive for two distinct reasons. It has a wide range of responsibilities from organizing non-academic events to enforcing SU policies and bylaws. It is also the position that deals with the students on a face-to-face basis the most. The advantage I have over the other candidates in this position is that I have had the opportunity to work closely with the current VP Internal; this has allowed me to

see firsthand what works and what needs to change. I have had the opportunity to sit on the General Faculty Council and the Fine Arts Council. This has allowed me to build a strong relationship with administration, faculty, and staff. Having a great relationship with the university administration is important for every position, the reason being it allows the ULSU and the university to work together to improve students’ experiences. I have also had the opportunity to sit

on the Student Engagement Committee this year; this has allowed me to learn the process that needs to be taken when planning events. It is important to be informed on what this position entails, and what promises are realistic, and I guarantee that all of my promises can be implemented. I possess the knowledge, experience and qualities necessary for this position and I hope you take that into consideration when voting.


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Features

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6 • March 8, 2012

Why am I so goddamn lazy? A note from your average lazy student R. M. Schafer

Features Contributor

Just the other day I saw a quote from author Charles Bukowski – “my ambition is handicapped by my laziness.” What a fantastical quote! Never before has a quote summed me up so completely, and I bet these words ring true for many of my fellow students. After four years at this fine university, one would think I would have it figured out – but not so much. After four years of classes, essays, assignments and such, one would think I would be a master of time management and organization – but not so much. After four years I have to ask, why am I procrastinating and wasting my time? Probably because I am extremely lazy. Yup. Simple. I know the problem, I know the solution – but I make little attempt to fix my bad habits. I daresay I am not the only student who suffers from a severe case of procrastination. I daresay there are in fact a great number of students suffering from a lack of ambition. Now, as I sit here, bottle of Jim Beam in front of me, I have to ask: Why am I so lazy? What is the cause, the source of laziness? Is it Jim’s fault? No, I’m the one who decided

Here’s looking at you, laziness

to hang around Mr. Jim Beam. Can I really blame my laziness on anything except myself? Mmm... not so much. It goes without saying that I am the only one to blame. In my first year (unlike most) I was excited to get back to school. I enjoyed going to my classes and

was genuinely interested in everything I was reading. My first two years I worked, and I worked hard. Now, in my fourth year I go through the semester doing the minimum. I only spend half as much time studying in the library. Only half as much time preparing before my

zZZ

zzz

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classes. It is not a good thing. I am constantly procrastinating, leaving assignments and essays ‘til the very last day, and then writing it with my good friend Jim Beam. That’s not healthy. And speaking of not healthy, my laziness has bled over beyond my schooling. I’ve spent the last week eating fast food simply because I have been too lazy to go grocery shopping. The 50 per cent off from Domino’s Pizza for students has not helped either, let me tell you. At this point in the article you have to be wondering what the solution is to extreme laziness. Well, I just asked myself the same question. I have not figured it out yet. I do not have any life lessons to share. No tips on how to get motivated. No ideas on how to change your life for the better. I am still trying figure out how to conquer my own slothfulness. Honestly there is only one real cure: you have to find something that you are passionate about. Something you are excited to do and want to do every day. I am working on finding my passion, as we all are – that is pretty much why we’re in university. So, in conclusion, if you have finished this piece you are not as lazy as most – in all honesty, I barely finished writing it in the first pla

Bunker down for The Outpost Nazi zombies. Need I say more? Olivier O’Brien

Features Contributor

Nothing gives joy like an awful movie, but recently I feel a little overwhelmed. Popular tendencies to rip on popular culture aside, something about this week’s line up at the local cheapy student theatre put me off; A Chipmunks sequel, Happy Feet 2, 3D Beauty and the Beast and, best of all, 3D Phantom Menace. Not a single new movie. So, I opted for an artsy foreign piece: The Outpost, which centers on the immutable memory of wars past in the European mindset, through the long-established allegory of immortal zombie Nazi supermen storming a bunker defended by desperate mercenaries. The Outpost stars Ray Stevenson of Punisher: Warzone and HBO’s Rome fame, reprising his role as paragon of the “beefy man hitting things” school of dramatic motif. Set in an unnamed war zone in the Balkans, a gang of mercenaries is hired by an unnamed corporation to recover an unnamed object. These are manly men in resplendent manly glory and such men do not ask questions: they answer them with lead. The trek to the bunker is best described as The Westender with guns, and functions as a reminder that a movie can never have enough scattered short shots of characters we don’t really know wandering aimlessly in a forest. The mercenaries arrive at the bunker and begin to search for their prize, but rapidly find themselves cornered in the bunker pinned

An outpost. The outpost? Perhaps.

down by an unseen sniper. Further exploration yields a mass grave and a lone catatonic survivor. The film plays out not as the expected gory B action flick, but a slow horror movie as a siege mentality overtakes the team who struggles with mysterious happenings from within and without. It’s a nice change that shows what an action movie could be like with less money for explosions, and a screenwriter’s consequent frantic need to fill the screen with something engaging... and cheap. And, nothing is cheap like tension: it’s just film of empty hallways and nervous people talking. The Bulkgain-powered troupe of testosterone troopers find themselves as fish out of water and they become stuck in what is, quite possibly, the most profane conversational feedback loop in the world. In classic horror fashion the first to die are the characters least developed, though in this case it means the characters

whose variety show brand accents rendered their profanity most unintelligible. This raises a question I have always had about movie stereotypes: if you wish to include an ethnically diverse cast to make the movie more PC, only to kill off those characters least like the Midwestern Übermensch, wouldn’t it be less racist not to bother in the first place? Maybe the idea of a troupe of selfsame characters being picked off one by one, gladly dying in the place of their carbon copy brethren struck the notoriously rightwing Hollywood elite as too communist – a social order must be observed after all. Despite its handful of failings, The Outpost is a good horror action movie, though honestly anything featuring zombie Nazi storm troopers is, by definition, badical. It’s a solid piece to ward away the New Year release blues, and a powerful reminder that other countries do indeed make movies; the lesson to be

learned here being you don’t always have to buy domestic. Especially domestic from an industry so determined to offer you a sub-par product that Phantom Menace 3D is considered fit for human consumption. Defending a movie whose sole outstanding feature is graphic effects doesn’t even work that well, not only because they can’t stand up to more well-rounded films that don’t rely solely on spectacle but because most modern “pretty movies” aren’t even that pretty – compare Avatar to 2001: A Space Odyssey in terms of which felt more real. Outpost was actually a pretty film (it seemed less fake) despite having relatively few effects, or perhaps

that’s because it has few effects. Whatever residue of modern studio production that was left, The Outpost was, while not expensive enough to be subtle, unobtrusive. Which is not to say that Outpost had good analogue effects; they were awful. But they’re well within the levels of camp that a movie about Nazi zombies must, by its nature, have – imagine trying to play that idea straight. My final thoughts are that movies are in fact usually a waste of time and the only thing that’s worse is the kind of circlejerk that talking about them spawns. So instead of reading this, go watch The Outpost.


meliorist

Features

the

March 8, 2012 • 7

Drugs, drugs, drugs. When is good? When is bad? Robin Keeley Features Writer

Does drinking actually kill brain cells? If I smoke weed, can I still get into college? If I take magic mushrooms, will I become schizophrenic? In light of Stephen Harper’s new war on drugs, it’s time to examine the facts surrounding drug use and the long-term consequences for both psychological and physiological health. With our prime minister choosing marijuana as his target, it is critical to consider the mechanisms of action of this drug in the brain and in the body. Most importantly we must consider that there is an effect of age and duration of use. In other words, one must consider the age of the person when they start smoking and how often and for how long they smoke. Ignoring the socioeconomic and legal issues, let’s begin by discussing the scientifically determined facts. In humans, the brain has not fully developed until roughly the age of 21. Interestingly, men and women’s brains develop at different rates, with men reaching full “brain maturity” later in life than women. Considering that people under the age of 21 find novelty much more rewarding than those whose brains have matured, most individuals are more likely to have their first drug experience before the age of 21, if at all. Therefore, any attempts to gauge the effects of drug use on the brain require researchers to study it at this critical time point. There is a lot of information out there, some better than others. Many people cite studies that suggest a strong link between marijuana use in adolescence and the development of schizophrenia. Others argue that women are more deeply affected by marijuana use, such that they have a higher likelihood of developing anxiety- and depression-like conditions in adulthood if they had been chronic marijuana users in adolescence. Still others argue that marijuana acts as a “gateway drug,” meaning that marijuana users are more likely to seek other drugs and will find those drugs more rewarding than non-marijuana users. While all of these claims are backed by empirical evidence, the problem is that the story is almost never as simple as one or two studies make it seem. In an attempt to communicate research findings to the public, there is often an oversimplification of the information. Unfortunately, this can also lead to the instatement of public policy without taking into account the complexity of the issues at hand. If we stick to the concrete facts, the plant itself, with slight variation from strain to strain, contains over 20 different compounds called cannabinoids. All of these compounds can have different effects on your brain – some complementary and some that counteract the effects of others. If you only examine the main psychoactive component of marijuana, delta9-tetrahydrocannabinol (THC), you find many properties of this compound, including but not limited to alleviation of asthma symptoms, anti-tumour effects, slowed perception of time, increased giddiness, paranoia, and euphoria. Given the lipophilic properties of the THC molecule, it can easily dissolve into fatty tissue, like body fat, the liver, and the brain, remaining in your system for days if not weeks. Interestingly, the receptor in the

brain to which THC binds and mediates its effects is found in approximately 90 per cent of the brain in varying concentrations. How can something that appears to have relatively benign if not positive properties lead to schizophrenia or anxiety and depression? Given the complex circuitry of the brain and the constant debate in the scientific community, there are many schools of thought on this matter. Some believe that ingesting any psychoactive drug (e.g. ecstasy, magic mushrooms, LSD and marijuana) acts as a synergistic factor (along with but not limited to socioeconomic status, family history and prenatal exposure to toxins, viruses, and medications) to produce a disease state later in life. In other words, smoking marijuana during adolescence can tip the scales towards a disease state, for example, by increasing the risk of developing schizophrenia. Others believe that smoking marijuana is more like opening a flood gate; without drug consumption during a critical time period, no mental illness would have ever developed. In support of this school of thought, a study conducted in Australia followed children to adulthood and observed that women who smoked marijuana in high school had a five times higher chance of developing anxiety and depression symptoms, a finding that was independent of any anxiety- and depression-like symptoms while they were children. Other groups argue that individuals suffering from mental health concerns seek alternative treatments, such as drug use, at the beginning of the appearance of symptoms of their illness. Along this line, some researchers believe that those individuals who were already on the path to developing a mental illness seek to alleviate early symptoms of their disease on their own. Without marijuana consumption, these scientists argue, these individuals likely would still have developed schizophrenia. This is especially interesting considering that schizophrenics who consume marijuana on a regular basis tend to fare better in a battery of cognitive tests as compared to those who don’t consume marijuana, even when both groups were sober. In short, there are a lot of current hypotheses about the long-term consequences of marijuana exposure during adolescence. However, the literature does seem to come to a consensus on one matter: first exposure to THC during adulthood does not confer any long-term consequences, i.e. people who start smoking marijuana as adults and not before, do not appear to suffer the same risks as adolescents. Some researchers argue there is an anti-depressant-like effect of marijuana on naïve adults. So while the scientists debate it out about just how it is that marijuana use during adolescence can produce its myriad of consequences, my take on the facts is that a young person should stay away from marijuana, graduate from university, get a job, get a life and get settled, and only then light up. If you have more interest in the brain and behaviour, be sure to check out the many events happening in and around the CCBN (Canadian Centre for Behavioural Neuroscience) from March 12 – 18 for Brain Awareness Week! Robin Keeley is a PhD student at the Canadian Centre for Behavioural Neuroscience.

Visit the CCBN Open House March 17th, 10 AM to 1 PM to learn more! The CCBN houses world-renowned research in the field of Neuroscience. Access more 2012 Brain Awareness Week Events at ccbn.uleth.ca


opinions

meliorist the

March 8, 2012 • 8

Kelti Boissonneault Editor-in-Chief For more information on contributing to The Meliorist, please contact Kelti Boissonneault, einc@themeliorist.ca

Our truth and effort:

Apathy on the rise; no one cares Kelti Boissonneault Editor-in-Chief

I admit to two things straight off the bat: I stole the headline from a season one episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and I’ve already written on this topic a lot this year — lambasting my contemporaries for a lack of involvement in their world beyond Facebook and gossip television shows. Now is your opportunity to prove me wrong, however: Go vote! Last year around election time the esteemed Keith Gardner, the then editor-in-chief of your humble student weekly wrote a similarlyframed editorial. I therefore credit him with the form this week’s opinion column has taken. Go vote! The fact that most positions for the SU Executive and General Assembly for student governance are running with little or no opposition frightens me as a free-thinking individual, a member of the union currently undergoing elections, and as someone who would have run if she could (conflict of interest). So: Go vote! The apathetic nature of the student population astounds me. I’m

not generalizing; I know that among the 8,000 undergrads on campus there are those who are wholeheartedly devoted to causes. That’s awesome! The fact that almost no one has shown interest in student governance or in any way fights to support the school through running in elections astounds and stupefies me. Since 99.9 per cent of you chose not to take up the torch of representation and advocacy, you could at least show your support to those who did. Go vote! There is almost nothing worse, in my opinion, than someone sitting in class tweeting their way through a lecture only to graduate four years later and bitch about how there are no jobs for their bachelor’s degree. I kid you not when I say your 4.0 GPA looks great on paper, but the life experiences you chose to ignore will come back to bite you in the ass. Go vote! Though it applies to the GA positions, I am particularly disappointed in the lack of competition for the SU President, VP Operations/ Finance, and VP Academic roles. Three people will run, and unless they are voted incompetent by their peers (doubtful, since they are actually people with brains) they will

have the job. Really? No one else cared? Fine, so you don’t want to spend a year of your academic career making just over a grand a month working to better your institution (it will detract from that alltoo-important deadline for getting a career in the real world, after all). The least you can do, therefore, is… Go vote! So if student governance isn’t your thing, why not focus on something else to help you gain some life experience on top of all those oh-souseful (insert subject here) courses? Apply for a position at your student newspaper (we pay!), work or volunteer for CKXU! LPIRG is another great organization to get involved in! The Women’s Centre, the Pride Centre, arts councils, clubs, and at least 10 more opportunities await you at every turn! So what if it detracts from your time devoted to watching the now-pregnant Snookie dramatize every little thing about her oh-so-made-up life! Watching the idiot-box all day and cruising Facebook and Twitter for the next funny internet meme is not going to impress your future employers. Neither will apathy, so… Put the paper down, walk over to the nearest computer, log on, go to ULSU.ca and VOTE! Elizabeth Porter

Letters Relevance:

TLF abuse

Here’s to a True Campus Newspaper

Dear Editor and Students, I should start off by saying how pleased I am to see the Meliorist covering campus related issues. Hard hitting and investigative campus newspapers help to keep Student Unions and Universities across the country accountable. The Meliorist has performed very poorly in this respect the last couple years, but after reading the last two issues I’m optimistic that this is about to turn around. What I am about to write should not be construed as an attack against the Meliorist for finally doing what I believe to be its central purpose. Rather, I simply would like to put two things in context regarding the Zoo and to challenge the Meliorist to expand on its coverage of campus issues. First, the regular operations of the Zoo have improved dramatically in the last couple years. This year alone, we’ve added many items to the menu, purchased new furniture, made improvements to the kitchen, added three new beer taps, implemented new service standards, and introduced well attended regular events. This has resulted in an in-

crease of 20% in food sales and 25% in draft sales from last year. The Zoo is busier today than it has been in recent memory. That is simply a fact, and not the opinion of an SU hack. This recognition that things are improving should be included in any critical debate on the Zoo. Second, I’d like to offer a defence of the mural. Regardless of your opinion of the mosaic, the previous mural sucked a lot worse, most students I’ve talked to agree with that. The decision to purchase a new mural was first made with extensive student consultation, which included an actual vote by students who visited the Zoo. The ULSU then sought submissions from the student body for the new mural. The chosen mural was hands down the most professional proposal we received. The price of ~$5,000 was actually reasonable considering it took a month+ of work from a student with professional skills, and required a lot of materials. Is the mural perfect? No. However, the process for its approval was sound, and it is honestly more inviting and interesting than the previous incarnation. That thing was truly haunting.

I’d like to reiterate that I’m ecstatic to see the Meliorist ready to cover campus issues. If I could suggest a next step, however, it would be this: cover them when they’re current. The mural was painted nearly two years ago; making it the cover of an issue now does nothing to influence that decision and it’s difficult to hold people accountable when they have since graduated If the Meliorist is looking for specific suggestions, it could start showing up to University Committees and ULSU GA meetings. These meetings are the location of many of the discussions and decisions which shape the growth of our campus. They are all mostly public, and their agendas are provided in advance. I will close by urging our campus newspaper to continue their latest trend, while ensuring to make future coverage more current, relevant and fact based. The last couple issues were enough for me to start reading the Meliorist again. Keep it up and more people on campus will follow suit. Zack Moline

A few weeks ago, the Meliorist decided to remove the TLFs, due to content in them that could be considered overt forms of bullying. Things along the lines of “To the girl(or boy) in the front row of class X, shut the fuck up, nobody cares about your stupid questions”. As a former student here, I understand the sentiment completely – we’ve all been in classes where somebody is spouting what seems to be inane, useless nonsense, unrelated to the class. Note that I use the word “seems” there rather deliberately – questions that may appear foolish rarely seem that way to the person doing the asking. Twenty-four percent. If you read the article published that week instead of the TLFs, this is the number of submissions that can be considered “overtly bullying”. As in, written with a specific target in mind, and intended to be harmful to that target. Consider what that number means. One-quarter of those who submit TLFs are trying to coerce or abuse someone. And it appears to be having an effect, too – starting with students too cowed to speak up in class. For me, as an instructor there is nothing which sucks the life out of a class more than silent ranks of students who just won’t say anything – even inane comments are better than nothing. I imagine a nasty TLF can have a pretty significant emotional effect on a person, too. And a whole series

of nasty TLFs? That could have a lasting effect on someone. It seems harmless on the surface, but this sort of shit just isn’t okay. It is mean-spirited, abusive, passiveaggressive behaviour that has no place among civilized people. In the words of Winston Churchill, “it costs nothing to be polite”. The only purpose of these TLFs is to cause unnecessary harm. I doubt that it even makes the author of the TLF feel very much better – it’s just a vent. One that could just as easily be served by any number of other actions. Like writing a TLF that doesn't single someone out. It isn't that difficult to do, although it might require a little bit of creativity. Hell, even just talking to those you want to insult, and at least doing it faceto-face where they have a chance to talk back at you, would be better than this. It would be even better if done constructively, and without all the vitriol. Three out of twelve. Six out of twenty-five. Twelve out of fifty. Personally, I probably have somewhere around twelve close friends. If three of them turned out to be assholes who would purposely, deliberately say this kind of thing, I'd consider myself to have made a terrible, horrible error in judgement regarding my choice of friends. I'd also probably be short three friends in rather short order. Kris Fischer


meliorist

Procrastination Unicorn Hunt!

mel•io•rism (meel’e riz’m, me’le e-), n. the doctrine that the world tends to become better or may be made better by human effort SU-166, 4401 University Drive West, Lethbridge, AB T1K 3M4 Phone: 329-2334 www.themeliorist.ca

Comics

Try to find this unicorn hidden somewhere in this week’s Meliorist. Email the page number and a brief discription of where you found it to einc@ themeliorist.ca. You’ll be entered to win our monthly Unicorn Draw. You can enter as many times in the month as we publish.

XKCD.com

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Sheila Mackenzie come claim your prize for the February unicorn hunt! SU166 or email einc@themeliorist.ca to arrange a time.

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Editor-in-Chief Kelti Boissonneault einc@themeliorist.ca

Advertising Manager Brandon Wallis

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The Meliorist is the student newspaper of the University of Lethbridge, published most Thursdays throughout the academic year by The Meliorist Publishing Society, an autonomous incorporated body. Please address all correspondence to The Meliorist, 4401 University Drive, Lethbridge, Alberta, T1K 3M4, or drop it off at room SU-166. Deadline for submissions is Sunday 4pm. The Meliorist appreciates and encourages the writing of thoughtful, concise, timely letters. However, The Meliorist will only consider for publication those letters which are signed by the author. Special arrangements may be made for those wishing anonymity, but absolutely no pseudonyms. Letters should contain the authors legible name, address, telephone number and student identification number. The address, I.D. and phone number will not be published. The Meliorist reserves the right to edit submissions and will not print libelous material. Letters may be edited for brevity, clarity and legality.

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Across

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1- June 6, 1944; 5- TKO caller; 8- Garage sale sign; 12- Green land; 13- Having auricular protuberances; 15- Ammo; 16- Thin stratum; 17- Babble; 18- _ kleine Nachtmusik; 19- At once; 22- One circuit; 23- Writer Hentoff; 24Blue hue; 26- Reebok rival; 29Kitchen; 31- Admiration; 32- Sleep disorder; 34- Rice dish; 36- Beaver creations; 38- Small mountains; 40- “James and the Giant Peach” author; 41- Sag; 43- Device with 88 keys; 45- Sticky stuff; 46Sheath; 48- Bigshot; 50- “From _ according to his abilities…”; 51- Not ‘neath; 52- Equipment; 54Pass through; 61- Singer Sedaka; 63- Functional; 64- Bargain; 65- Rice-shaped pasta; 66- Farm machine; 67- Hostelries; 68Abound; 69- Condensed moisture; 70- Carry;

1- He loved Lucy; 2- Per _ ; 3Composer Khachaturian; 4- Aden native; 5- _ avis; 6- Part of Q.E.D.; 7- Celebration; 8- Enzyme ending; 9- Cudgel; 10- New Rochelle college; 11- Pace; 13- Tomb inscription; 14- 4th letter of the Greek alphabet; 20- Arp art; 21- Quick sharp bark; 25- Put _ on it!; 26Alert; 27- Withdraw money from use; 28- Long-billed sandpiper; 29- Australian cockatoo; 30- Lout; 31- Append; 33- Actor Wallach; 35- Andy Capp’s wife; 37- Caribbean dance music; 39- Meddling person; 42- Agreement; 44- Dedicated to the _ Love; 47- Small tree; 49- Accept as true; 52- Gnarl; 53Able was _ ...; 55- Not much; 56Egypt’s river; 57- Killed; 58- “All The Way To _ “, song by REM; 59Pessimist’s word; 60- Additional; 62- Actor Herbert;

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News Editor n.editor@themelisorist.ca Features Editor Matt Baird f.editor@themeliorist.ca Entertainment Editor Billy Davey e.editor@themeliorist.ca Sports and Lifestyle Editor Nicole Meech s.editor@themeliorist.ca Campus Beat Reporter Janet Barriage campus.beat@themeliorist.ca Photo Editor Jon Martin p.editor@themeliorist.ca Illustrator Elizabeth Porter Copy Editor James Forbes Distribution Manager Tracy Fairs Production Assistants Emma Ferguson Myles Havinga Creative Designer Brandon Wallis Webmaster Chris Morris Printing Southern Alberta Newspaper Group Contributors Olivier O’Brien Zoe Migicovsky R.M. Schafer Emma Ladouceur Erin Luchia Shuna Talbot RJ Balog Robin Keeley Travis Robinson Cover Elizabeth Porter


Zoo week

Student opinions and ratings on our campus bar Kelti Boissonneault Editor-in-Chief

What the Zoo has to say On Tuesday I had the pleasure of sitting down with SU General Manager Cheri Pokarney to discuss The Zoo in detail in response to our question

Q&A Student 1

Student 2

Major: Accounting Year: 4th Frequency? “Probably just once.” Likes? “The proximity to campus. The other students—it’s a good way to meet other people.” Rating? “7/10”

Major: Civil Engineering Year: 2nd Frequency? “A quarter of the week.” Likes? “The atmosphere. Pretty good food.” Dislikes? “Closed so early.” Rating? “8/10”

to students last week regarding The Zoo, and their opinion of it. I would like to extend my thanks again to Pokarney, who took the time out of her hectic schedule (there are elections happening, after all) in order to speak with the Meliorist. So what’s new with The Zoo? According to Pokarney there have been many upgrades to The Zoo in the past few years including new carpet and furniture, reupholstered booths, the addition of three draft lines for a total of six beers on tap, new televisions, dishes, equipment, till system, and 28 more menu items for patrons to choose from. The additional draft lines for on-tap beers also include the arrival of Guinness to The Zoo in order to encourage more refined beer-drinkers to come up to the on-campus pub. One of the major criticisms students seem to have against The Zoo is its lack of identity, something, as Pokarney points out, that can actually be considered a strength for the campus institution. Despite The Zoo not really knowing what it is (a

Jesse Gamble says:

Student 3

Student 4

Dear Editor,

Major: Computer Science Year: 2nd Frequency? “Once a week.” Likes? “Taco Tuesday and service is pretty good.” Dislikes? “Prizes at events are all about women… and event is only packed for an hour before everyone vanishes.” Rating? “7/10”

Major: Anthropology Year: 3rd Frequency? “About three times a year.” Likes? “It’s on campus. Nice to have lunch at and have a drink with lunch.” Dislikes? “I like the idea of the entertainment, but it doesn’t really fall into place. It gets really loud and chaotic.” Rating? “6/10”

add my two cents from an insider’s perspec-

In honour of “Zoo Week” I thought I would tive. When I graduated high school in 2006 from a small Alberta town I found myself attending frequent road trips to Lethbridge. This was the era the Duke was at its glory (rest in peace, you sweet prince). Though the Duke was an excellent place to grab a drink, our plans for each road trip were focused around the epic cabarets at The Zoo. The long lines, which stretched to the bus loop gave the pub atop of the SU building a feel of exclusiveness. Once inside, all bets were off. My fondest memories of those years were the trips here to enjoy the

Student 5

Student 6

Major: Management Year: 4th Frequency? “Twice a month.” Likes? The atmosphere, the pool tables, and its good to do homework there.” Dislikes? “The music choice.” Rating? “7.5/10”

Major: Neuroscience Year: 3rd Frequency? “Only twice.” Likes? “I went for the open mic. I really liked that, it was fun. The set up is really nice with the booths.” Dislikes? “No.” Rating? “8/10”

Student 7

Student 8

Major: Marketing Year: 1st Frequency: “Once a month.” Likes? “The food is good and the service.” Dislikes? “The environment. It’s not really bar-like; it’s like it’s in a spare room, or something.” Rating? “5/10”

Major: Management Year: 2nd Frequency? “Maybe once in a month.” Likes? “I like its location; its nearby. Has decent selection of booze.” Dislikes? “It’s a little pricy.” Rating? “6/10”

outrageous times at the campus pub. In the fall of 2009 I decided to enrol at the University of Lethbridge. Being a “mature” student had its advantages, but most neighbours and roommates I encountered in my first year had formed solid friendships with fellow students

Coleman Massey says: To the important shit: the campus bar. You want to examine the reputation, impact, and existence of The Zoo; I can for sure tell you it exists, so there’s that, as for its reputation and impact I see them as minimal. A minimal impact on the students here, and a somewhat soiled reputa-

Ashley Markus says: I don’t go to the university anymore, but when I did, there was one year where the zoo was really great.  I believe it was 2004-

club, a pub, or a restaurant), Pokarney says the

has also recently purchased new summertime

variable identity actually benefits the institution

patio furniture so summer patrons can enjoy the

because of its adaptability. She says that because

patio and view over their breaks.

points and looks forward to student support. Those larger events like LCB and Oktoberfest come under fire for having long line-ups, but with

there are so many different groups of students on

Fighting the deficit is one of the trickiest pieces

8,000 students on campus and a maximum cap-

campus, all wanting something from their cam-

of business for The Zoo, but it is hoped that sum-

acity for The Zoo of 550, you can see where things

pus pub, the flexibility The Zoo offers allows them

mer business will help decrease that deficit come

will get a little tight. To alleviate the line ups some

to cater to each group’s needs. Head bangers can

the start of the 2012 fall semester. In addition, The

of these events are planned to be held outside, but

have rocking concerts, while during the afternoon

Zoo also does catering for events such as wed-

not much can be done when the weather sours

a study group can debate philosophy over a few

dings or conferences held in the ballrooms, and

the event (see LCB 2011, and Oktoberfest 2012).

pints.

relies on ballroom rental fees to help bring down

Many students have a love-hate relationship

The campus bar isn’t without its own problems

the debt. Does it always work? No. Sometimes

with The Zoo. Pokarney hopes that with some

and challenges, however, including opening each

The Zoo loses money over the course of the year,

diligent work and continued progress, the love

year starting on a deficit and having to make up

but the deficit is rolled over and eventually seems

will start to outweigh the hate for a lot of stu-

the short-fall. When asked about why that defi-

to balance itself out without any additional funds

dents and staff. When asked about the possibility

cit occurs, Pokarney points out that the two main

taken from the SU or QIP funding, which would

of becoming a brew-pub like other universities,

managers of The Zoo are paid year-round, instead

not be available to The Zoo anyway.

Pokarney points out a limited amount of space be-

of just during the operating months of September

Much of the Zoo deficit is alleviated by larger

ing the biggest obstacle. The Zoo would not, how-

through April. The reason The Zoo managers are

events like Last Class Bash, Ender Bender, and

ever, be opposed to hosting local brews from any

paid year round is for continuity, and to maintain

other smaller more frequent events like karaoke

new microbreweries that spring up, or even use

quality in managerial staff (good managers would

(Tuesday nights) and the occasional Dirty Bingo

one of their six taps as a “visitor tap” and change it

find other jobs rather than wait for the school

(coming up again on the 16th) and televised

every couple of weeks. The Zoo was the first place

year to start). The Zoo hopes to lessen the defi-

Flames games (particularly when they play the

in Lethbridge to serve Rolling Rock beer out of the

cit, however, by remaining open for the upcoming

Oilers). Zoo patronage is going up as people get

United States, and as Pokarney says, they are con-

summer for lunch services during the week, and

used to the 28 new menu items and increased ser-

stantly “…delighted to get something unique.”

possibly dinner services closer to the weekend.

vice from hiring on more wait-staff and kitchen

These summer hours will allow students, faculty,

workers. Despite challenges like continuity in

What’s your opinion of The Zoo? Got any sug-

and staff on campus to come up to the campus

dishes and the occasional drop in quality if there’s

gestions? E-mail einc@themeliorist.ca and I’ll be

pub for lunch. Pokarney mentioned that The Zoo

a rush on, The Zoo is working to correct these

sure to pass them along!

they had known for years at this point. In or-

ena that this establishment fosters. I also love

experience. The staff consisting of prospective

der to make my own path, I turned to The Zoo.

the staff. They are some of the most colourful

artists, anthropologists, archaeologists, teach-

Heading upstairs for steak sandwich Mon-

and interesting people I have interacted with

ers, neurologists, psychologists, etc. make up

days with classmates quickly turned stran-

since being here. I love having a chat with the

one of the most enthusiastic and friendly teams

gers into friends. Over the years The Zoo be-

Neurology cook who is going for his Masters.

I have ever had the privilege to be a part of.

came a place to go to kick back, share laughs

I enjoy working alongside one of our other

The Zoo is a warm, entertaining and welcom-

and enjoy life on campus. I have forged many

bartenders whose passion for archaeology puts

ing location. Offering some of the cheapest

friendships with staff, classmates and patrons

Indiana Jones to shame. But I really marvel at

drinks in town ($10 jugs, $4 shots and high-

over the years there. That lone has made my

our waitresses. Each one has a different major,

balls, $4.25 for ANY cocktail, 6 beers on tap),

time at the University special. Thank you, Zoo.

all of whom tirelessly cover extra shifts so their

the pub is not only a place to make friends, but

A few days after Reading Week in the spring

fellow comrades are not crushed by their school

escape the pressures of school. If anyone has

semester of 2010 I was hired at The Zoo as the

work. Between serving patrons and cleaning

doubts about how great The Zoo is, I urge them

new bartender. In the past two years I have

tables, all of them can usually be found scanning

to come with an open mind and a willingness

only had three unruly patrons. Part of the rea-

through textbooks, feverously studying for the

to enjoy themselves. I am more than happy

son for such a low number of incidents is the

midterm immediately following their shift. I am

to oblige. With students as staff, we share

atmosphere of inclusion the bar supports. If

always blown away by their work ethic, charis-

in your frustrations and anxieties of school.

you come in for a good time, you leave after

ma and positivism – even in the face of criticism

But my job is not simply to pour beers. I

having one. If you come in and treat the staff

from certain public forums. Busy days at The Zoo

think of it as trying to enhance the experi-

like they are serfs, you will not have the same

only reinforce my belief that the staff is immacu-

ence of students positively while at the Uni-

experience. I found The Zoo to be very similar

late at their job. When one server, one bartend-

versity of Lethbridge. Treat yourself! Come

to Cheers, in that after a short period of time

er and two cooks feed over one hundred people

join me for a beer at the bar and let The Zoo

the service staff gets to know you on a personal

in a single sitting and the worst complaint is

take care of you (rhyme totally intentional).

level. I’m sure many customers can attest to this

someone had to wait an extra twenty minutes

It’s the place where EVERY week is Zoo Week!

“where everyone knows your name” phenom-

for their Waffle Fries, I consider that a successful

tion. That is unless you frequent The Zoo and ap-

so popular at the UofC and why Studio dominates

money,” “it’s lame,” or “it closes too early, let’s just

preciate it for what it is; a place to drink at school,

Thursday night in this town; drink prices. When

go to (insert other bar here)”. So what is my opin-

get some good (enough) food at an ok price, and

I say The Zoo has a soiled reputation I’m refer-

ion on The Zoo? The Zoo has potential, I enjoy the

a fun place to hang out with friends. I know that

ring to the lack of people I see in there, ever. Sure

ambiance when I’m there with friends (hate the

when I go to The Zoo to just hang out, it is fun,

there is quite the crowd at some cabaret’s (not all,

mural), I love going to see live music here (been

but at the end of the night, I always hate paying

trust me) and LCB/Ender Bender, but on a regu-

lacking), cabaret’s are fun (when I’m hammered,

the bill; let’s just say Studio can be cheaper. I’m

lar night, and even some events it is well within

and there’s lots of people), and I definitely enjoy

not telling The Zoo that drink prices need to be

fire code. When I talk to people about going to

having the bar on campus.

rock bottom, but it’s no secret why Thursden is

The Zoo the response’s are usually the same; “no

05 when Loralee Edwards was president. The

a bit of a makeover- it had a little more class.

think about when you elect your student

biggest part was the quality of the food went

We would often go in there during the day for

representatives- not sure how much control

up.  They got some real chefs in there and of-

lunch and a drink, it was a really nice break.

they have over the zoo, but it may also be

fered really great, healthy, affordable food.

Then I graduated and I heard it all went to

worth speaking to the ULSU management.

From what I can remember, the zoo also got

shit again.  So perhaps this is something to

Those are my thoughts!

Q&A Students 9

Student 10

Major: Kinesiology Year: 4th Frequency? “Maybe once a month.” Likes? “I don’t know. When I was in my first year I liked last class bash.” Dislikes? “The mural is definitely at the top of the list. It’s the most ugly piece I’ve seen on a wall… service can be slow. The prices are not indicative of the food. They close too early. It really has no identity— it’s not like a sports bar, a club, or anything…” Rating? “3/10”

Major: Political Science/ Psychology Year: 2nd Frequency? “Once.” Likes? “I definitely like that they employ students. The hours. The service is great.” Dislike? “The only thing I’d change is that they have more vegetarian dishes.” Rating? “8/10”

Student 11

Student 12

Major: History Year: 3rd Frequency? “Probably about once a month.” Likes? “Their pizza is good. And, I guess, the atmosphere.” Dislikes? “Nothing in particular. Well… not a huge fan of the mural.” Rating? “7/10”

Major: Management International Student (Poland) Frequency? “Maybe twice a week.” Likes? “The atmosphere—very nice and friendly… and the music isn’t too loud.” Dislikes? “I don’t think so. Well, probably too small.” Rating? “8/10”

Student 13

Student 14

Major: Economics Year: 1st Frequency? “Once a month.” Likes? “It’s pretty quiet, usually. I haven’t been to the events but it’s nice to study with a drink.” Dislikes? “I read that article, in the paper—and it’s a pretty bad piece of art. I’m honestly not sure what to make of it.” Rating? “7/10”

Major: Exercise Science Year: 2nd Frequency? “One time a week.” Likes? “Usually pretty quiet, except during events. Service is on the ball.” Dislikes? “I can’t really think of anything.” Rating? “7.5/10”


Zoo week

Student opinions and ratings on our campus bar Kelti Boissonneault Editor-in-Chief

What the Zoo has to say On Tuesday I had the pleasure of sitting down with SU General Manager Cheri Pokarney to discuss The Zoo in detail in response to our question

Q&A Student 1

Student 2

Major: Accounting Year: 4th Frequency? “Probably just once.” Likes? “The proximity to campus. The other students—it’s a good way to meet other people.” Rating? “7/10”

Major: Civil Engineering Year: 2nd Frequency? “A quarter of the week.” Likes? “The atmosphere. Pretty good food.” Dislikes? “Closed so early.” Rating? “8/10”

to students last week regarding The Zoo, and their opinion of it. I would like to extend my thanks again to Pokarney, who took the time out of her hectic schedule (there are elections happening, after all) in order to speak with the Meliorist. So what’s new with The Zoo? According to Pokarney there have been many upgrades to The Zoo in the past few years including new carpet and furniture, reupholstered booths, the addition of three draft lines for a total of six beers on tap, new televisions, dishes, equipment, till system, and 28 more menu items for patrons to choose from. The additional draft lines for on-tap beers also include the arrival of Guinness to The Zoo in order to encourage more refined beer-drinkers to come up to the on-campus pub. One of the major criticisms students seem to have against The Zoo is its lack of identity, something, as Pokarney points out, that can actually be considered a strength for the campus institution. Despite The Zoo not really knowing what it is (a

Jesse Gamble says:

Student 3

Student 4

Dear Editor,

Major: Computer Science Year: 2nd Frequency? “Once a week.” Likes? “Taco Tuesday and service is pretty good.” Dislikes? “Prizes at events are all about women… and event is only packed for an hour before everyone vanishes.” Rating? “7/10”

Major: Anthropology Year: 3rd Frequency? “About three times a year.” Likes? “It’s on campus. Nice to have lunch at and have a drink with lunch.” Dislikes? “I like the idea of the entertainment, but it doesn’t really fall into place. It gets really loud and chaotic.” Rating? “6/10”

add my two cents from an insider’s perspec-

In honour of “Zoo Week” I thought I would tive. When I graduated high school in 2006 from a small Alberta town I found myself attending frequent road trips to Lethbridge. This was the era the Duke was at its glory (rest in peace, you sweet prince). Though the Duke was an excellent place to grab a drink, our plans for each road trip were focused around the epic cabarets at The Zoo. The long lines, which stretched to the bus loop gave the pub atop of the SU building a feel of exclusiveness. Once inside, all bets were off. My fondest memories of those years were the trips here to enjoy the

Student 5

Student 6

Major: Management Year: 4th Frequency? “Twice a month.” Likes? The atmosphere, the pool tables, and its good to do homework there.” Dislikes? “The music choice.” Rating? “7.5/10”

Major: Neuroscience Year: 3rd Frequency? “Only twice.” Likes? “I went for the open mic. I really liked that, it was fun. The set up is really nice with the booths.” Dislikes? “No.” Rating? “8/10”

Student 7

Student 8

Major: Marketing Year: 1st Frequency: “Once a month.” Likes? “The food is good and the service.” Dislikes? “The environment. It’s not really bar-like; it’s like it’s in a spare room, or something.” Rating? “5/10”

Major: Management Year: 2nd Frequency? “Maybe once in a month.” Likes? “I like its location; its nearby. Has decent selection of booze.” Dislikes? “It’s a little pricy.” Rating? “6/10”

outrageous times at the campus pub. In the fall of 2009 I decided to enrol at the University of Lethbridge. Being a “mature” student had its advantages, but most neighbours and roommates I encountered in my first year had formed solid friendships with fellow students

Coleman Massey says: To the important shit: the campus bar. You want to examine the reputation, impact, and existence of The Zoo; I can for sure tell you it exists, so there’s that, as for its reputation and impact I see them as minimal. A minimal impact on the students here, and a somewhat soiled reputa-

Ashley Markus says: I don’t go to the university anymore, but when I did, there was one year where the zoo was really great.  I believe it was 2004-

club, a pub, or a restaurant), Pokarney says the

has also recently purchased new summertime

variable identity actually benefits the institution

patio furniture so summer patrons can enjoy the

because of its adaptability. She says that because

patio and view over their breaks.

points and looks forward to student support. Those larger events like LCB and Oktoberfest come under fire for having long line-ups, but with

there are so many different groups of students on

Fighting the deficit is one of the trickiest pieces

8,000 students on campus and a maximum cap-

campus, all wanting something from their cam-

of business for The Zoo, but it is hoped that sum-

acity for The Zoo of 550, you can see where things

pus pub, the flexibility The Zoo offers allows them

mer business will help decrease that deficit come

will get a little tight. To alleviate the line ups some

to cater to each group’s needs. Head bangers can

the start of the 2012 fall semester. In addition, The

of these events are planned to be held outside, but

have rocking concerts, while during the afternoon

Zoo also does catering for events such as wed-

not much can be done when the weather sours

a study group can debate philosophy over a few

dings or conferences held in the ballrooms, and

the event (see LCB 2011, and Oktoberfest 2012).

pints.

relies on ballroom rental fees to help bring down

Many students have a love-hate relationship

The campus bar isn’t without its own problems

the debt. Does it always work? No. Sometimes

with The Zoo. Pokarney hopes that with some

and challenges, however, including opening each

The Zoo loses money over the course of the year,

diligent work and continued progress, the love

year starting on a deficit and having to make up

but the deficit is rolled over and eventually seems

will start to outweigh the hate for a lot of stu-

the short-fall. When asked about why that defi-

to balance itself out without any additional funds

dents and staff. When asked about the possibility

cit occurs, Pokarney points out that the two main

taken from the SU or QIP funding, which would

of becoming a brew-pub like other universities,

managers of The Zoo are paid year-round, instead

not be available to The Zoo anyway.

Pokarney points out a limited amount of space be-

of just during the operating months of September

Much of the Zoo deficit is alleviated by larger

ing the biggest obstacle. The Zoo would not, how-

through April. The reason The Zoo managers are

events like Last Class Bash, Ender Bender, and

ever, be opposed to hosting local brews from any

paid year round is for continuity, and to maintain

other smaller more frequent events like karaoke

new microbreweries that spring up, or even use

quality in managerial staff (good managers would

(Tuesday nights) and the occasional Dirty Bingo

one of their six taps as a “visitor tap” and change it

find other jobs rather than wait for the school

(coming up again on the 16th) and televised

every couple of weeks. The Zoo was the first place

year to start). The Zoo hopes to lessen the defi-

Flames games (particularly when they play the

in Lethbridge to serve Rolling Rock beer out of the

cit, however, by remaining open for the upcoming

Oilers). Zoo patronage is going up as people get

United States, and as Pokarney says, they are con-

summer for lunch services during the week, and

used to the 28 new menu items and increased ser-

stantly “…delighted to get something unique.”

possibly dinner services closer to the weekend.

vice from hiring on more wait-staff and kitchen

These summer hours will allow students, faculty,

workers. Despite challenges like continuity in

What’s your opinion of The Zoo? Got any sug-

and staff on campus to come up to the campus

dishes and the occasional drop in quality if there’s

gestions? E-mail einc@themeliorist.ca and I’ll be

pub for lunch. Pokarney mentioned that The Zoo

a rush on, The Zoo is working to correct these

sure to pass them along!

they had known for years at this point. In or-

ena that this establishment fosters. I also love

experience. The staff consisting of prospective

der to make my own path, I turned to The Zoo.

the staff. They are some of the most colourful

artists, anthropologists, archaeologists, teach-

Heading upstairs for steak sandwich Mon-

and interesting people I have interacted with

ers, neurologists, psychologists, etc. make up

days with classmates quickly turned stran-

since being here. I love having a chat with the

one of the most enthusiastic and friendly teams

gers into friends. Over the years The Zoo be-

Neurology cook who is going for his Masters.

I have ever had the privilege to be a part of.

came a place to go to kick back, share laughs

I enjoy working alongside one of our other

The Zoo is a warm, entertaining and welcom-

and enjoy life on campus. I have forged many

bartenders whose passion for archaeology puts

ing location. Offering some of the cheapest

friendships with staff, classmates and patrons

Indiana Jones to shame. But I really marvel at

drinks in town ($10 jugs, $4 shots and high-

over the years there. That lone has made my

our waitresses. Each one has a different major,

balls, $4.25 for ANY cocktail, 6 beers on tap),

time at the University special. Thank you, Zoo.

all of whom tirelessly cover extra shifts so their

the pub is not only a place to make friends, but

A few days after Reading Week in the spring

fellow comrades are not crushed by their school

escape the pressures of school. If anyone has

semester of 2010 I was hired at The Zoo as the

work. Between serving patrons and cleaning

doubts about how great The Zoo is, I urge them

new bartender. In the past two years I have

tables, all of them can usually be found scanning

to come with an open mind and a willingness

only had three unruly patrons. Part of the rea-

through textbooks, feverously studying for the

to enjoy themselves. I am more than happy

son for such a low number of incidents is the

midterm immediately following their shift. I am

to oblige. With students as staff, we share

atmosphere of inclusion the bar supports. If

always blown away by their work ethic, charis-

in your frustrations and anxieties of school.

you come in for a good time, you leave after

ma and positivism – even in the face of criticism

But my job is not simply to pour beers. I

having one. If you come in and treat the staff

from certain public forums. Busy days at The Zoo

think of it as trying to enhance the experi-

like they are serfs, you will not have the same

only reinforce my belief that the staff is immacu-

ence of students positively while at the Uni-

experience. I found The Zoo to be very similar

late at their job. When one server, one bartend-

versity of Lethbridge. Treat yourself! Come

to Cheers, in that after a short period of time

er and two cooks feed over one hundred people

join me for a beer at the bar and let The Zoo

the service staff gets to know you on a personal

in a single sitting and the worst complaint is

take care of you (rhyme totally intentional).

level. I’m sure many customers can attest to this

someone had to wait an extra twenty minutes

It’s the place where EVERY week is Zoo Week!

“where everyone knows your name” phenom-

for their Waffle Fries, I consider that a successful

tion. That is unless you frequent The Zoo and ap-

so popular at the UofC and why Studio dominates

money,” “it’s lame,” or “it closes too early, let’s just

preciate it for what it is; a place to drink at school,

Thursday night in this town; drink prices. When

go to (insert other bar here)”. So what is my opin-

get some good (enough) food at an ok price, and

I say The Zoo has a soiled reputation I’m refer-

ion on The Zoo? The Zoo has potential, I enjoy the

a fun place to hang out with friends. I know that

ring to the lack of people I see in there, ever. Sure

ambiance when I’m there with friends (hate the

when I go to The Zoo to just hang out, it is fun,

there is quite the crowd at some cabaret’s (not all,

mural), I love going to see live music here (been

but at the end of the night, I always hate paying

trust me) and LCB/Ender Bender, but on a regu-

lacking), cabaret’s are fun (when I’m hammered,

the bill; let’s just say Studio can be cheaper. I’m

lar night, and even some events it is well within

and there’s lots of people), and I definitely enjoy

not telling The Zoo that drink prices need to be

fire code. When I talk to people about going to

having the bar on campus.

rock bottom, but it’s no secret why Thursden is

The Zoo the response’s are usually the same; “no

05 when Loralee Edwards was president. The

a bit of a makeover- it had a little more class.

think about when you elect your student

biggest part was the quality of the food went

We would often go in there during the day for

representatives- not sure how much control

up.  They got some real chefs in there and of-

lunch and a drink, it was a really nice break.

they have over the zoo, but it may also be

fered really great, healthy, affordable food.

Then I graduated and I heard it all went to

worth speaking to the ULSU management.

From what I can remember, the zoo also got

shit again.  So perhaps this is something to

Those are my thoughts!

Q&A Students 9

Student 10

Major: Kinesiology Year: 4th Frequency? “Maybe once a month.” Likes? “I don’t know. When I was in my first year I liked last class bash.” Dislikes? “The mural is definitely at the top of the list. It’s the most ugly piece I’ve seen on a wall… service can be slow. The prices are not indicative of the food. They close too early. It really has no identity— it’s not like a sports bar, a club, or anything…” Rating? “3/10”

Major: Political Science/ Psychology Year: 2nd Frequency? “Once.” Likes? “I definitely like that they employ students. The hours. The service is great.” Dislike? “The only thing I’d change is that they have more vegetarian dishes.” Rating? “8/10”

Student 11

Student 12

Major: History Year: 3rd Frequency? “Probably about once a month.” Likes? “Their pizza is good. And, I guess, the atmosphere.” Dislikes? “Nothing in particular. Well… not a huge fan of the mural.” Rating? “7/10”

Major: Management International Student (Poland) Frequency? “Maybe twice a week.” Likes? “The atmosphere—very nice and friendly… and the music isn’t too loud.” Dislikes? “I don’t think so. Well, probably too small.” Rating? “8/10”

Student 13

Student 14

Major: Economics Year: 1st Frequency? “Once a month.” Likes? “It’s pretty quiet, usually. I haven’t been to the events but it’s nice to study with a drink.” Dislikes? “I read that article, in the paper—and it’s a pretty bad piece of art. I’m honestly not sure what to make of it.” Rating? “7/10”

Major: Exercise Science Year: 2nd Frequency? “One time a week.” Likes? “Usually pretty quiet, except during events. Service is on the ball.” Dislikes? “I can’t really think of anything.” Rating? “7.5/10”


12 • March 8, 2012


entertainment

meliorist the

March 8, 2012 • 13

Billy Davey Entertainment Editor For more information on contributing to Entertainment, please contact Billy Davey at e.editor@themeliorist.ca

TheatreXtra season is quelled with Wide Awake Hearts Billy Davey

Entertainment Editor

Punctuating the end of the TheatreXtra season, Wide Awake Hearts was staged from March 1 – 3, directed by Kyle Schulte. The production featured one of the more elaborate set designs and some not so elaborate costume designs during a scathingly romantic scene of forbidden love, which wasn’t that forbidden since character “A” wrote it into the script. The play’s four characters, romantically named “A,” “B,” “C,” and “D,” are suffering from some profound love issues when “A” writes a screenplay and casts his best friend (C) and his wife (B) as the lead parts, placing them into an onscreen love affair that manifests itself into all four characters’ real lives. And to make the already conflicting emotions worse, “D,” who is the best friend’s girlfriend, begins working as the editor of the movie. “A” was played by Greg Wilson, who also had the lead role in the last TheatreXtra play. His character didn’t take much of anything seriously and loved to drink. Wilson fit into “A” wonderfully, taking perfect pauses to make the jokes even more noticeable and was able to switch between his character’s humorous wit and serious strife with precision, which helped the audience keep up with the change in energy. Wilson’s character was an audience favourite from the first scene, with uncanny humour and complicated emotions (almost killing another character). “A’s” wife was his alphabetical partner “B,” played by Shelby Carlson. Being cast as the lover of her husband’s best friend and having him fall in love with her off screen, “B” is the center of much of the romantic drama. This causes Carlson to get some serious on-stage action. However, while she was the center of the whirlwind of troubles, the character usually seemed to know what was going on and remained calm. Carlson expressed this nicely, while she would also vocalize a flare

of emotions at the frustration she had with her husband. The best friend and other actor cast in the film was “C,” played by Jonathan Martin. The whole plot seemed setup for him to fail; cast by your best friend to make love and be intimate on screen with his wife, while your girlfriend edits. “C” struggles with this mess from the first scene and never quite grasps how to handle it. The final corner of this love square is “D,” played by Danielle Martens. This character always seems to be getting the bad end of the deals. First she loses “C” to another, then she must edit and make

this all look spectacular on screen, and then she falls in love again and almost gets strangled to death. This made the character very bitter and unlikable, but Martens dealt with this aptly by only exploding with anger when absolutely necessary. “C’s” lines could have probably all been shouted in anger, and it would make perfect sense, but Martens made her seem more like the victim she was. In light of the play’s content (film), the set was equipped with a projector that played cinematic scenes or provided alternative backdrops. The projector would show a scene as it happened, which was a

Imaginary Girls by Nova Ren Suma Zoë Migicovsky

Entertainment Writer

Imaginary Girls is the kind of novel for which the phrase “deliciously creepy” was invented The haunting young adult novel Imaginary Girls by Nova Ren Suma combines beautiful writing, complex characters and an eerie and intriguing storyline for the kind of creepy book you can’t miss. It’s told from the perspective of Chloe, but the real star is Ruby, her older sister who is the kind of girl everyone wants to be­ – especially Chloe. But

then a night of partying ends with Chloe finding the dead body of her classmate, and she’s sent away from her hometown and her sister. The majority of the novel takes place two years later, when Chloe returns to live with her sister, and what happens next will test even the strongest bonds of sisterhood. As a main character, Chloe wasn’t exactly compelling, but that’s because she’s defined by her relationship with Ruby, even when they aren’t together. In fact, in an ordinary novel, without the contrast Ruby provides, Chloe might actually have been more interesting. As it was, every scene without Ruby in it was one I found a little bit lacking. Ruby is the Imaginary Girl, mythical and complex and magical. The storyline of Imaginary Girls has a paranormal element to it I

didn’t expect, but it’s a perfect kind of creepy, eerie paranormal as opposed to vampires and werewolves. Even readers who tend to prefer realistic fiction may find themselves entice by Suma’s creation. In fact, what makes Imaginary Girls such an extraordinary novel is the incredible representation of sisterhood, so complex and amazingly captured. There are also a few twists and turns that I didn’t expect, and writing so gorgeous it defies anyone who claims that young adult literature means a lower caliber. Imaginary Girls is the kind of novel for which the phrase “deliciously creepy” was invented; it’s filled with beautiful imagery and layered with complex storylines. Add some haunting writing and you have a story that lingers like smoke long after you turn the final page.

very creative idea when the characters were acting through a scene in the movie. It sometimes proved distracting and unnecessary; during a monologue, the screen showed drifting particles (maybe glitter or something of that sort), and it proved merely to draw attention away from the actor when he needed it. However, to the audience from to other end of the room, it probably looked fine because the actor lined up with the screen making it an actual backdrop, not the divided attention grab that it seemed from my angle. But overall, the projector aided the actors, such as in the closing

scenes where they ran through multiple takes from the film and the screen showed the scenes as they happened with all the reference numbers and retakes you might expect from raw film footage. The projector also allowed the play to end in cinematic fashion, with credits rather than a bow. Wide Awake Hearts was written by Brendan Gall and has been nominated for a Governor’s General Award. It ended the TheatreXtra season beautifully and sets up the next season wonderfully.


the

entertainment

meliorist

14 • March 8, 2012

Awake

A must-see television event RJ Balog

Entertainment Writer

Let me just start things off by saying that I was more than excited for this show. A couple months ago a friend told me that he’d seen a trailer for a new show that looked incredible. Not even half way through the trailer I remember asking when it came to theatres, and I was informed that this wasn’t a movie. It was a TV show airing in the next couple of months. Last Thursday was that day. My mind got blown. Awake more than exceeded my expectations with one of the richest, personal, and flat out best pilot episodes I’ve ever seen. The initial appeal is the inclusion of the great Jason Isaacs, most commonly known for his role in Harry Potter as Lucius Malfoy. He’s terrific. But before I go on to gush over Jason Isaacs, let me give you a quick rundown on what Awake’s all about. Right away the show dives into the main aspects of the plot and the essential elements of the story. Michael Britten (Isaacs) gets into a car accident with his wife (played by Laura Allen) and his son (played by Dylan Minnette), which subsequently twists his life and reality beyond control. From that moment on Britten lives in two realities. One in which his wife has died, and the other in which his son has died.

Britten goes from being with his wife who’s mourning their son, until he closes his eyes and returns to the world where he is with his son who is struggling with the loss of his mother. Britten uses mnemonic techniques like different coloured rubber bands to help differentiate the two realities. The concept is unique and tragic, and unlike anything I’ve seen. The paradoxical concepts that are brought up are intelligent and cleverly woven into the story that it leaves you in awe. The story unfolds seamlessly without cutting corners and without overcomplicating

things, leaving it accessible and ensnaring. Awake is filmed with pristine cinematography on level with some major motion pictures. Isaacs once referred to each episode as a little movie every week. What is really clever is the parallel seen between the two realities. Aspects from one world subtly emerge echoing within the other. The realities are in balance but contrast with unique parallels like his partner in one world and his partner in the other. Even the fact that his job is as a detective plays off in more ways than one. In one way it somewhat mirrors the plot as a man trying to

discover the truth distinguishing what’s real, what’s concrete, from what isn’t. And in a different way, it plays off of what he experiences constantly shifting from reality to reality as elements from one become relevant and important in the other. This is where the show’s deep raw emotion really shines through. This man is bouncing between one world where his wife has died, and another where his son has died; this is physically, emotionally, and mentally exhausting for him. It’s also the heartbreaking and tragic concept that is essential in Awake.

Michael Britten has experienced losing both of the people he loves most. He then must live in two separate worlds where he must try to console one of them for losing the other, even though he is able to have them both. It truly is tragic seeing him go from one to the other without any hope of having them both. In a recent interview Isaacs said that of course Britten knows that one is a dream, and that one of them really did die. But he’s given the chance to be with them both, and as he says in the show, “if the price of seeing them, feeling them, having them in my life is my sanity… it’s a price I’d happily pay.” Heartbreaking. Isaacs also stated that the most important priority for the show was to keep things fresh, and that no episode is the same. Britten’s world is constantly changing, and the show reflects that. The hook is in trying to figure out the mystery. Isaacs has mentioned how many people have tried explaining the ending as if they know, like maybe he’s in a coma and they’re both dead. But Isaacs just smiles and has said that one world is a dream, and that he knows which one it is. You’ll just have to tune in this Thursday and see if you can figure it out for yourself. And if you missed the pilot it’s available on NBC’s website. This show is a must watch. Check it out.

iPods and headphones or records and gramophones? The digital versus vinyl debate Andrew Guilbert The Concordian

MONTREAL (CUP) — In the last decade or so, the way we experience music has changed drastically. Many now walk around with a miniature library of music in their back pockets, downloading music directly to their computers for a fraction of what they used to pay in stores. Still others have gone retro, touting the virtues of vinyl as the superior method of music enjoyment. But what makes a person prefer one to

the other? Twenty-four-year-old Cory Pereira, a.k.a. DJ Pinky Pereira, plays shows all over the world, but currently calls Montreal home. Though he began his career on vinyl, he’s since moved on to using nothing but digital music for his shows. “I know [DJs] that still appreciate vinyl, but the majority of them are digital now, including all the international DJs I know; they’re the ones who finally convinced me to switch to digital.” He explains that digital has over-

taken vinyl in its once iconic role at the turntables mainly for the ease of use and practicality the format allows. “What made me change was cost efficiency and the amount of stuff I used to have to carry for gigs. Now it’s so much easier; I can travel with my laptop, my two controllers and my soundcard in the same bag and that’s it.” The other advantage, he says, is the sheer amount of music he now has access to during his shows. “On my laptop right now, I have maybe 200 GBs of music. On vinyl, I’d only

have three, maybe four, songs per record,” he says. For some, the prospect of having thousands of songs at your fingertips is exactly what turns them away from mp3s. “There [are] pros and cons to having the ability to access everything,” says Sam Mullen, a McGill graduate in music performance. “If you have endless choices, it destroys your focus. I’d much rather listen to an album over and over again so I can hear the fine details of it.” Mullen has been a record col-

lector for years but admits that his stance on musical mediums is not for everyone. “I wouldn’t say limiting yourself is an answer for everybody — but for someone who wants to study music seriously, or wants to get to know music, it can definitely help to limit your choices.” As a musician himself, he says that those limits are what fuel creativity and bring about new variations of music. He believes that when you take away limitations “it leads to monotony everywhere.” Sylvain Plourde, a professor of digital audio at Montreal’s Trebas Institute, argues that new technology has allowed casual listeners to experience unprecedented sound quality. “Back in the day with Walkmans, you had to deal with the horrible background noise on tapes, so mp3s are better in that sense.” That lack of “background noise” is also what he sees as the big advantage that digital recording has over the analog process vinyl uses. Plourde says to imagine the recording of analog vinyl as Morse code: “When you make S.O.S. ‘dot dot dot’ sounds, they can come out at the other end of the line as ‘dot dot’ and a lot of garbled noise,” whereas the digital method is like “directly writing that S.O.S. on paper,” it has no chance of getting garbled in transit like analog would. As for the idea that vinyl sounds better? “You’ve got to be careful not to compare apples and oranges,” says Plourde. “If you take a $100 hi-fi record and put it on a $50,000 turntable, of course it’s going to sound better than an mp3 file. But take a cheap record and play it next to a song in [the audio editing software] Pro Tools, and you’ll get the same result.” That being said, Plourde believes there will always be differences in sound quality throughout mediums for those with sharp enough ears to hear it. And for the rest of us? “Ignorance is bliss,” he laughs.


meliorist

Entertainment

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March 8, 2012 • 15

Plants and Animals The End of That (Secret City)

The Montréal band has released an album filled with the spirit of rock with The End of That. Recorded near Paris, the album is much more choreographed than previous ones, using less jamming to create tracks. The album starts with a calm yet intriguing acoustic guitar and continues in a simple fashion with a basic drum beat, tame vocals, and a sedated lead guitar in “Before.” The second track, “The End of That,” is probably the closest the group comes to their self-definition – “post-classic rock.” The first single, “Lightshow,” is a dichotomy of a simple rock tune and a full sound that seems to drown itself out, which sets the tone for the rest of the album. The End of That, in entirety, has few shortcomings and it signals that the band is doing anything but slowing down.

March 8 Renee Werenka and Friends @ Good Earth Coffee House 6pm to 8:30pm Bluesmyth @ The Slice 9pm

Kixxsin @ Lethbridge Casino 9pm

Paul McCartney Kisses On The Bottom (Hear Music)

Justin Moore’s second album, Outlaws Like Me, has been much more successful than his first and has helped the country singer establish himself as more of an artist. The album features songs about rednecks, heaven, tractors, honky tonks, beer, fishing, backroading, guns, Chevys, and outlaws; now I like a good cliché from time to time – but goddamnit Justin. Besides my absolute contempt towards modern/mainstream country’s lyrical pursuits, the album is pretty average. Songs like “Beer Time,” “Bait a Hook,” and “Guns” are all fairly good soundtracks for the activities they describe. So if you are into pickup trucks, shooting things, and vague expressions of pedophilia in “Sunshine Babies” (listening to the states he sings about and having seen the Toddlers & Tiaras show, I have no idea what demographic he is interested in), this is for you.

Going for a jazz-pop sound, the legendary Paul McCartney summons on some classic, and fairly unknown, American jazz tunes. Only “My Valentine” and “Only Our Hearts” are written by McCartney himself. The entire album is smooth and easy listening, starting with a song written in 1935 by Fats Waller, “I’m Gonna Sit Right Down and Write Myself a Letter.” Many songs, especially “It’s Only a Paper Moon,” have excellent rhythm sections composed of various strings like guitars, violin, and a piano that have an audible dance every time the vocals stop. The album, however, leaves the listener wishing for McCartney to change the general theme up, such as in “Bye Bye Blackbird” and “Only Our Hearts,” which both feature orchestral arrangements. Kissing On The Bottom is good for the easy listening fan but could use more things like the harmonica solo in the last track.

March 9

March 12

March 14

Hey!

Luke Bruce @ Black Tomato Lounge 7pm to 9pm

Wanna post your

L.A. Beat open jam with Devon Coyote @ Owl Acoustic Lounge 9pm

opening?

The Dudes with Lustre Creame @ U of L 9pm

Lethbridge Folk Club open mic @ Wolfs Den 8pm

HBO3 Jazz Jam @ The Slice 9pm

Dust Rhinos @ The Slice 9:30pm

Erin Ross @ Mocha Cabana 6pm to 9pm

Open mic with Cory Oryniak and Dave Tilsley @ Jimmy’s Pub 9pm

Kixxsin @ Lethbridge Casino 9pm

Open mic @ Owl Acoustic Lounge 9pm

Tristan Skretting @ Mocha Cabana 6pm to 9pm

band’s concert? Your phallacious Level 8 gallery Email your events to e.editor@ themeliorist.ca!

••• March 11

March 10 Erin Ross @ Owl Acoustic Lounge 9pm

Justin Moore Outlaws Like Me (The Valory Music Co.)

Sidney York with the Fortunate Isles and Violent Kins @ The Slice 8pm

March 13 Open mic @ The Slice 9:30pm Open mic @ Bo Diddlys 7pm to 10pm

Got nothing on the go? Go to an event. Write an article. Contribute it to The Meliorist.


TLFs

16 • March 8, 2012

Want to SKYDIVE? Find out how you can skydive for FREE* through the Thrill Seekers Challenge! Info booth will be in the Students Union entrance March 1st and 6th from 10-4.

Quote for thought: “Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose.”

Thank you so much to the kind hearted person who found and turned my pretty samsung phone into security! It’s so good to know people like you still exist!!:)

Thank you Melorist staff for last weeks TLF post. It really needed to be done.

Uh, someone needs to clue in the candidates… I don’t think everyone’s being informed about elections. We need posters to [completely] plaster the walls, not just litter walkways ah… reading week. Everyone looks forward to being extremely productive. Nearly everyone looks back and says wtf did I do with my time? Oh well, two more months to summer!!! Totes Magotes thanks for ticketing the “able bodied” people who park in the handicap stalls!!! keep it up! maybe a few more tickets are what these people need before they smarten up! ‘Cutting Out Cancer’ fundraiser by Delta Eta Iota Sorority Selling custom cut or pre-order Cancer Awareness shirts @SU building by food court, March 5-9th all week 10am-2pm! When you google map directions from Lethbridge, AB to Tokyo, Japan #21 and #37 is “Kayak across the Pacific Ocean.” Seriously, good luck with that =] Last day with Prof. Linville in RELS1000? D’: sad face!!! Gonna miss you, u are funny and gave me more of a reason to pay attention to ur lectures :)

ATTENTION ARTISTS: Media Kit Design Call Out for Love and Records 2012 – Submission deadline is March 31 – ckxu.com/ loveandrecords for more information!!!! I love it when the lights are off on 9th floor library. Its so romantic ;) Ohhh, so it was Orson Welles that pioneered POV camera angles. I always thought it was Ron Jeremy. My prof said: “You just can’t do this assignment the night before” – Challenge Accepted =] That moment when you realize you may have screwed over your GPA to get into Ed Faculty because of one stupid GLER. FML. Everyone should be Optimus Primes rather than Negatrons, keep up the kindness and Pay It Forward! Cheers to the good times at the Zoo for Zoo week! Just wanted to say THANK YOU to Matt Baird, for saying what we were all thinking. The Zoo mural is a disgrace. FTR, I’ve been wearing sunglasses indoors because I have light sensitivity due to post-concussion syndrome, not because I’m a douchebag. <3 your favourite derby girl/knes major

Anyone else remember a 90s kids show about rock and roll clowns who wore red, green, and blue, and sang a song called “Tom Foolery”? Anyone? The guitarist in the tunnel is great! Thanks for the music. Thank you to all the generous and nice students out there. Really makes ppla day better :) Dear Miss Jenny B, You are the most lovely and wonderful roomie around, I am eternally greatful for your heart of gold! xxx Kait Looking to purchase 2 Moonlight Run entries for March 10/12. Please email b.erler@uleth.ca If you are a god and your body is a temple then shouldn’t people believe in you? New village has now turned into gopherpocalypse. Seeing dead gophers being eaten by magpies really makes my busy and stressful semester just that much more fun! Thanks construction Men r born btween a womans legs n spend the rest of their life trying to get back between em. Why? Cuz there’s no place like home. The great thing about dildos is that there are rarely men attached. Party on, ladies. Nothing scares a person more than the words “We need to talk” Happy Birthday to Alex the Asian! - from your ridiculously good looking girlfriend.

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PRONGHORN NIGHT AT THE MOVIE MILL!Wednesday March 14 at 6:00pm. Half the proceeds are going towards Pronghorns Athletic Scholarships, please come out and support the Pronghorns!! Best hair, best looking, and best platform? I think we all know who I’m voting for. I want to see change at this school, not just the same old things again and again. What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn’t matter what you call him, he still won’t come. Feeding the visiting high school students CJs is not a way to insure they want to come here. In fact, it’s most likely to do the opposite. Come check out DHI’s shirt cutting sale @ the SU building- all proceeds go to The Canadian Cancer Society! Helpful Tip: When brushing ur teeth, leave the water running while u rinse. This A) leaves less of a mess behind. B)Grosses out roommates less & C) helps out person cleaning d B.R. When I was young, I was an idealist. There was beauty all around me. I soon became a realist. There were hard truths everywhere. Now, I’m a surrealist. Stuff got weird after that. It is depressing that there is only one espresso machine on campus. Even more depressing is the fact that its broken :’( When bad things happen to good people, it’s fate. When bad things happen to bad people, it’s Jack Bauer

Submit your TLFs at WWW.THEMELIORIST.CA or to THEMELIORIST@GMAIL.COM. All TLFs must be submitted via a valid uleth account. Keep in mind that slanderous or offensive TLFs my be edited or omitted. The TLFs do not reflect the views or opinions of The Meliorist Publishing Society.

Band/Album/Label

* indicates Canadian artist


lifestyle

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March 8, 2012 • 17

Nicole Meech Sports and Lifestyle Editor For more information on contributing to Sports and Lifestyle, please contact Nicole Meech, s.editor@themeliorist.ca

ENERGY BARS! Made for everyone? Nicole Meech

you can’t peel your eyes away from the screen long enough to make a proper meal.

Lifestyle Editor

Energy bars, much like Gatorade or Powerade, have evolved to target the general public rather than targeting the people these products were made for: athletes. It can be argued that even athletes should not be consuming such products, but for the sake of this article we’ll pretend that the occasional energy additive is acceptable in the proper conditions. What are the conditions you may ask? Any activity that exceeds 90 minutes would suffice, aka an endurance activity. Endurance can encompass virtually anything aerobic that is performed for at least 90 minutes. Endurance does not involve playing your favourite video game for hours on end and grabbing an energy substitute because

What is an energy bar? Because energy bars are so readily marketed, it is sometimes assumed that they fall into the same category as granola bars. But no matter what the shiny label tells you, you would be better off leaving the chocolate bar in disguise behind and opting for a natural source of energy/protein such as nuts, eggs, or meat. Even casual gym-goers may think that eating an energy bar after a work-out is justified but this is not the case. After a casual work-out you would actually end up consuming a lot more calories than you burned during your sweat session, therefore making your efforts

pointless. There is also the myth that energy, like protein shakes, will help make you huge. Unfortunately that is not the case either (we will save the reasons for another time). Weighing your options Check out how top selling energy bars nutritionally stack up to top selling chocolate bars. The amount of calories, fat, sodium, carbohydrates, and sugar is listed for each bar. Note that energy bars contain significantly more nutrients than chocolate bars, but we are only examining the things that are likely to increase your waistline. So even though energy bars have the nutritional goodness that chocolate bars lack, the bad stuff still outweighs anything good that you would be getting.

Energy bars

Chocolate bars

LARA Bar: cocoa coconut, 45 grams 240 calories 13g fat 120mg sodium 29g carbohydrates 22g sugar

Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups: 34 grams 170 calories 10g fat 120mg sodium 18g carbohydrates 17.5g sugar

Vega Whole Food Energy Bar: chocolate, 63 grams 240 calories 10g fat 190mg sodium 30g carbohydrates 22g sugar

Coffee Crisp: 38 grams 195 calories 10g fat 35mg sodium 26g carbohydrates 17g sugar

ProMax Energy Bar: chocolate mint, 75 grams 280 calories 6g fat 180mg sodium 38g carbohydrates 28g sugar

Smarties: 30 grams 140 calories 4g fat 15mg sodium 22g sugar

Keepin’ it fresh: Exercise of the week Nicole Meech Lifestyle Editor

In an effort to help keep your workouts fresh, or simply provide some ideas as you start to exercise or continue to exercise throughout the semester, each week I will post a different howto explanation for a certain exercise. Some of these exercises are tried and true and merely serve as a reminder of their benefits, while others will be new and quite possibly even made up by yours truly. Either way, I hope you enjoy – happy exercising!

Hamstring Curl Hamstrings are often overlooked when people think of toning their legs, but they are a huge deal to skip out on. Even experienced runners should be focusing on strengthening their hamstrings through more than just running. This move mainly targets your hamstrings but you will also feel it in your glutes.

How-to:

1. Lie on your back with your arms extended in line with your shoulders and your ankles resting on top of a stability ball.

2. Squeeze your butt as you lift your hips off the ground while pulling the ball toward your butt with your heels. Return to start and repeat. *Note: when you get really good at this exercise try placing your arms in an “x” across your chest to decrease the stability of the move, therefore increasing the benefits.

Demonstration by Brady Flesch


sports

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March 8, 2012 • 18

Murray medals at Canada West Championships Pronghorns Athletics Sports Contributor

The University of Lethbridge sent 22 athletes to Saskatoon this past weekend for the Canada West Championship meet hosted by the Saskatchewan Huskies. Both the men’s and women’s side finished eighth in the team standings with the men earning five points and the women’s side earning one point. Fifth-year runner Kyle Murray was the lone Pronghorn to medal at the Canada West Championships, winning a silver medal in the 300 metres. Murray finished the final

with a time of 34.80 and is the lone Pronghorn to qualify for the CIS Championships. First-year thrower Nathan Burris had the next highest finish among the Pronghorn men with a seventh place finish in the weight throw with a distance of 13.95 metres. The top finish among the Pronghorn women was Christina Juert, also a first-year thrower, who finished sixth in the weight throw with a distance of 14.29 metres. Murray will travel to Winnipeg to compete in the CIS Championship meet, hosted by the University of Manitoba March 8 – 10.

Horns CIS Championship teams inducted into Lethbridge Sports Hall of Fame Pronghorns Athletics Sports Contributor

The three time CIS Champion Lethbridge Pronghorn women’s rugby team is set to receive another honour as it was announced today by the Lethbridge Sports Hall of Fame that the 2007, 2008 and 2009 teams will be inducted along with five other inductees at the 27th anniversary induction ceremony on May 5, 2012. After winning their first Canada West title a year prior, the Horns won the first of three consecutive national championships in 2007, defeating the host school University of Western Ontario. As the host of the CIS Championships in 2008, the Horns were guaranteed a berth in the tournament but went through the front door, winning a third consecutive Canada West title and went on to defend their

national title on home soil, defeating St. Francis Xavier (St. FX). The Horns continued their dom-

inance the following season and went undefeated in the inaugural Canada West conference sched-

ule, outscoring their opponents 217-7. The Horns ran through the conference tournament and CIS

Championship preliminaries in Vancouver setting up a rematch of the 2008 Championship game versus St. FX. Prevailing 20-3, the Horns earned their last of three consecutive CIS Championships. Over those three seasons, the Horns compiled a 26-3 record, including a perfect 13-0 during the 2009 season. The Lethbridge Sports Hall of Fame 27th Anniversary Induction Ceremony is set for Saturday, May 5, 2012 at the Coast Lethbridge Hotel Conference Centre at 6 p.m. Tickets are $45 each (or $315 for a table of eight), available from City of Lethbridge Ticket Centre locations at the Yates Theatre and the Enmax, or by phone at (403) 329-7328. Hall of Fame members, family, friends, and the public are encouraged to join this annual celebration of sports history in Lethbridge, and the Lethbridge Sports Hall of Fame.

The end of an era

Prima donna wide receivers a thing of the past in the National Football League Travis Robinson

Sports Op-Ed Contributor

Legendary NFL wide receiver Terrell Owens was recently profiled in GQ magazine, decidedly more subtle than usual. Owens, a six time Pro Bowl selection, was as well known for terrorizing NFL secondaries as he was for quarterback feuds and Herculean egoism. Owens’ ostentatious touchdown celebrations and impossibly chiselled physique garnered him a legion of followers, while his blithe separatism from teammates merited league-wide detraction. Now the 38 stands ousted from the NFL, a fad of pro sports that failed to stick into the new decade. While his ridiculously muscular body remains intact, that destructive ego that Owens wielded in his NFL career is gone, replaced by a selfreflective shell that is utterly sad. Owens has picked up employment in the Indoor Football League, a mere teardrop in the turbid ocean of the North American sports community. His shunning from the NFL

stands as testament to the growing movement of teams ousting prima donnas like Owens and replacing them with team players eager to run routes and make catches without the spotlight as incentive. If the wide receiver position is the entertainer of the football field, then the 2000s stood as a world’s stage for a troupe of megastars. Owens, along with fellow wideouts Randy Moss, Chad Johnson and Steve Smith, were a gang of one in the showy new NFL. Their freakish athleticism was only matched by their exuberance and grandstanding. These self-aggrandizing showmen placed equal emphasis on making the one-handed catch as formulating an ornamental touchdown celebration. Their teammates revelled in the antics; their coaches and owners were placated only by their ability to make game changing plays with seemingly minimal effort. Hometown fans loved these athletes; fans of rival teams despised them. This dichotomy only seemed to fuel them. In a 2005 playoff game, Randy Moss, after

scoring a late game touchdown, feigned mooning the rival crowd as part of his touchdown celebration. The prudish television announcers were “disgusted” by the act; Moss himself took the $10,000 dollar fine with a shrug, as if such a punishment was routine. Such an act was what the NFL came to expect of its star wideouts: a selfish, albeit humorous, celebration by a once-in-a-lifetime athlete that caused cheers and jeers across its fan base. A darker side of the 2000s entertainer-receiver was unleashed by both the hated sports media and the teams themselves. These athletes came to revile the pesky media as much as they celebrated touchdowns. Owens and Johnson had numerous spats with reporters; Moss himself ceased speaking with the media, meriting another league-instigated fine. While seemingly counter-intuitive, their hatred towards the media was, in hindsight, perfectly logical. These men were control freaks, wishing to have close guard on their careers and

subsequent actions. The unfiltered media was pandemonium to these men, as journalists wrote stories and asked questions that were utterly uncontrollable. As a result, these showmen became aloof and distant to the media, not wishing for any vexatious reporters to disturb their act. This control spread onto the playing field, and these athletes grew hostile to quarterbacks and coaches alike, unwilling to throw them the ball at their beckon call. The consequent on-field venom between receiver and quarterback was what ultimately cauterized the player-team relationships these athletes had. Football is the quintessential team sport, and these individuals, while financially profitable, were cancerous to a team environment. Both Owens and Moss were bounced from team to team during the prime of their careers, unwilling to play a cohesive game. The limelight was the primary stimulus to their production, and winning championships came secondary. Owens, Moss, Smith and Johnson

have yet to, and probably never will, capture a Super Bowl ring. In the new decade, it seems to be that the star NFL wide receiver is a corps of them, eager to win championships, rather than show off new touchdown gags. The New York Giants utilized a multi-receiver package to win this year’s Super Bowl. Teams are looking for humbler groups of wideouts to replace the nefarious star that destroyed many teams in the past decade. The 2000s is a distant memory for fans and players alike: Moss is ebbing in and out of retirement; Johnson and Smith are in the twilight of their careers. The aforementioned Owens, who ranks only second to the legendary Jerry Rice in terms of all-time receiving yards, is playing in a pickup league, despite possessing world-class skills. While he may have brought on this career nosedive, his plight serves to show that a team game is just that, and that the big money NFL relies on winners, and not showmen, to operate.


classifieds Career and Employment Services

• • •

JOBS JOBS JOBS!!! Let us introduce you to CES (Career & Employment Services). CES is a student service office dedicated to assisting you with your Career and Job Search needs. We’re within the Career Resources Centre in AH154, along with Applied Studies and the Management and Arts & Science Cooperative Education programs. CRC office hours are 9am - 12pm and 1pm - 4pm Monday-Friday. Go to our website for more detailed information on our services: www.uleth.ca/ross/ces.

• • • • •

INFORMATION SESSION ON CAMPUS University of Victoria Presents: Master of Global Business Program Information Session for Business Students Wednesday March 14 AH116 4:30-5:30pm RSVP to huangyt@uvic.ca

WIN AN iPad 2! Visit: http://www. fromlearningtowork.ca/ and fill out the survey for your chance to win!

WORKSHOPS to March 23: Please SIGN UP for workshops at CES (AH154) or email ces. students@uleth.ca

CES Resume/Cover Letter Workshops: * Tue, Mar 13, 3-5pm * Thurs, Mar 15, 11am-1pm * Tues, Mar 20, 3-5:30pm * Thurs, Mar 22, 9:30am-12pm

CES Networking & Job Search Workshops:

* Thurs, Mar 8, 9:30-11:30pm * Fri, Mar 16, 10am-12pm * Wed, Mar 21, 12-2pm

CES Interview Techniques Workshops:

• • • •

• • • • • • •

PART-TIME • • • • •

CES Career Portfolios Workshops:

• •

Visit our website www.uleth.ca/ross/ces and click on the student section to find the CES online job board!

• •

Camp Councilors and Camp Specialist, Various Locations ~ Canadian Camp Staff (May 31) Christian Summer Camp Staff for Underprivileged Kids Camp, Evansburg ~ Brightwood Ranch (May 31) Invasive Weed Management Technician, Prince George/Peach Region BC ~ Spectrum Resource Group Inc (March 31) Wetland Naturalist, Creston ~ Creston Valley Wildlife

Nanny/Babysitter, Various Locations ~ SOS Sitter (Jun 8) Gas Price Surveyor, Leth ~ Market Planning Solutions Inc (Mar 16) Data Analyst, Cgy ~ Bethany Care Society (Mar 15) Sales/Productions Associate, Leth ~ CertaPro Painters (Mar 17) Tutors Required – all subjects, all levels, Leth ~ First Tutors (Mar 18) Relief Staff, Leth ~ Lethbridge Family Services (Mar 31) Early Childhood Development Mapping Project Coordinator, Fort MacLeod ~ FM FCSS (Mar 14)

FULL TIME •

Summer Postings

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March 8, 2012 • 19

• • • • • • • • • • • • • •

• • • • •

• • • • •

* Fri, Mar 23, 11am-1:30pm

* Mon, Mar 19, 10-11:30am

Management Area (Mar 16) Ecosystem Ecology Summer Field Research Assistant, Leth ~ UofL (Mar 31) JFR Crew Leader/Sub Leader ~ Sustainable Resource Development (Mar 30) Research Assistant, Leth ~ Farming Smarter (Mar 15) Program Leader/Camp Counselor; Program Coodinator; Assistant Program Coordinator; Camp Cook; Dining Hall Steward; Program Coordinator/Camp Ranger ~ The Bert Sheppard Scout Reserve (Apr 2) Pool & Waterfront Supervisors Needed in the NWT ~ NWT Rec & Parks Assoc (Mar 9) Aquatic Science Assistant, Yellowknife ~ Environment Canada (Mar 15) Customer Resource Center Specialist, Cgy ~ Syngenta (Mar 14) Herbicide Applicator ~ Renu-LTech Environmental Ltd. (Mar 14) Art/Drama Camp Instructors, Leth ~ University of Lethbridge (Mar 16) Curatorial & Program Assistant, Claresholm ~ Town of Claresholm (Apr 13) Crop Scout Assistant, Carseland ~ Crop Production Services (Mar 17) Archaeological Assistant, Cgy ~ TERA Environmental Consultants (Mar 17) Canadian Angus Summer Internships, Various Locations ~ Canadian Angus Association (Mar 18) Seasonal Problem Wildlife Control Worker, Cgy ~ Eagle Creek Wildlife Control (Mar 23) Summer Resource Technician, Camrose ~ Ducks Unlimited (Mar 20) OSI Project Assistant, Edm ~ Alberta Office of Statistics & Information (Mar 23) Watershed Education & Stewardship Outreach Assistant, Red Deer ~ RDRWA (Mar 16) Clubhouse Staff, Leth ~ Henderson Lake Golf Club (Mar 17) Summer Camp Counsellor, Cgy ~ Leighton Art Centre (Apr 27) Product Development Technician, AB/SK/MB ~ Syngenta (Mar 31)

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• • • • • • •

Crop Scout, Leth ~ Parrish and Heimbecker (Apr 20) Flash Content Creator, Cgy ~ eCompliance (Apr 1) MS Project Expert/Administrator ~ RFT (Mar 16) Addiction/Mental Health Counsellor, Cgy ~ Primary Care Network (Mar 26) Forage Marketer, Leth ~ Willbur-Ellis Company (Mar 23) Sales Trainee, Melbourne/Tilbury/ Rosetown/Vegreville ~ Cargill (Mar 2) Cereals Research Associate, AB/SK ~ Syngenta (Mar 31) Psychologist & Assistant Psychologist, Various Locations ~

Correctional Service of Canada (Apr 30) Executive Team Leader, Various Locations ~ Target (Mar 27) Consultant, Business Applications, Cgy ~ Ideaca Knowledge Services (Mar 9) Manager in Training Program, Cgy ~ Abercrombie and Fitch (Mar 9) Project Manager; Surveyor; Estimator, Cgy ~ Kidco Construction (May 31) Health Promotion Facilitator in Active Living, Cgy ~ Alberta Health Services (Mar 9) Clerk VI; Clerk V, Cgy ~ Alberta Health Services (Mar 9) Human Resources Generalist, Leth/ Taber ~ Rogers Sugar (Mar 11) Operations Lead, Lloydminster ~ C2 Farms (Mar 31) Assistant Farm Manager, Biggar ~ Singer Enterprises (Mar 12) Farm Operations Lead, Leask ~ Singer Enterprises (Mar 12) Agronomist ~ Sanderson & Associates (Apr 19) Structural Drafting Technologist, Leth ~ Read Jones Christofferson LTD (Mar 16) Crop Production Advisor, Shaunavon/North Battleford ~ Crop Production Services (Mar 17) Research Coordinator; Research Associate, Fort Vermillion ~ Mackenzie Applied Research Association (Mar 15) F.E.I.A. Cultural Technician Assistant ~ Piikani Nation (Mar 16) Leadership Development Program, Cgy/Edm ~ Crane Supply (Mar 23) Health & Fitness Manager, Leth ~ YWCA (Mar 9) Entry Level Manager, Edm/Cgy ~ WIS International (Mar 30) Inventory Coordinator, Edm/ London; Maintenance, Edm/ Halifax;Quality Control Tech, Creston; Site Logistics Manager, Creston ~ Labatt (Mar 24) Business Development Manager, Leth ~ BlackBridge Networks (Mar 25) Registered Nurse/Registered Psychiatrice Nurse, Camrose ~ Bethany Group (Mar 28) Programmer Analyst, Cgy ~ Telvent (Mar 29) Peace Officer, Nisku ~ Leduc County (Mar 19) Buyer, Cgy ~ Bell Helicopter Textron

• • •

Canada (Mar 30) Research Entomologist, Vancouver ~ Terramera (Mar 14) Forage & Livestock Agronomist, Westlock ~ Gateway Research Organization (Mar 23) Support Center Technician, Cgy ~ DataDrill Communications (May 31)

Temporary • • • • • • •

Educational Assistant, Leth ~ Lethbridge School District #51 (Mar 13) Territory Sales Representative, Edm ~ Syngenta (Mar 14) Customer Service Representative, Shaunavon ~ Crop Production Services (Mar 17) Revenue Accountant, Leth ~ Holy Spirit Catholic Schools (Mar 23) Contract Employment Internship Position (Mar 24) Fast Forward Leadership Program, Various Locations ~ KPMG (Apr 9) Coordinator, Group Homes, Cgy ~ Boys & Girls Clubs of Cgy (Mar 15)

INTERNATIONAL • • • • • • • •

China Internship ~ CCRC Asia (Apr 4) International & Intercultural Internship Program ~ CACHA (Mar 16) Teaching Options in South Korea Spring/Summer 2012 ~ Korjob (Mar 15) ESL Teacher, Taiwan ~ KNS Language Institute (May 1) Youth Ambassador, Tanzania ~ Youth Challenge International (Mar 16) Teach English in South Korea, South Korea ~ Eagle Consulting (May 31) English (ESL) Teacher, South Korea ~ Neo Education (May 31) ESL Teacher, South Korea ~ Dreamworks Recruiting (May 1)

For details of the postings and information on the application processes go to www.uleth.ca/ross/ces and click on the student section to see the job board.



The Meliorist Volume 45, Issue 23