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Page 2, The Loafer • March 18, 2014


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March 18, 2014 • The Loafer, Page 3

Volume 28 Issue #15

Photo by Woody Woodruff

Publisher - Bill Williams • Editor/Graphic Arts Director - Don Sprinkle • Office Manager - Luci Tate Cover Design - Bill May • Photography - Mark Marquette Advertising - Dave Carter, Akey Kincaid, Lisa Lyons, Terry Patterson, Pam Johnson-Bowling Contributing Staff - Jim Kelly, Andy Ross, Ken Silvers, Mark Marquette, Pat Bussard Published by Tree Street Media, LLC., P.O. Box 3238, Johnson City, TN 37602 Phone: 423/283-4324 FAX - 423/283-4369 www.theloaferonline.com • info@theloaferonline.com e-mail: editorial@theloaferonline.com (editorial) adcopy@theloaferonline.com (advertising All advertisements are accepted and published by the publisher upon the representation that the agency and/or advertiser is authorized to publish the entire contents and subject matter thereof.The agency and/or advertiser will indemnify and save the publisher harmless from any loss of expense resulting from claims or suits based upon contents of any advertisement,including claims or suits for defamation,libel,right of privacy,plagiarism,and copyright infringement.


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Spring Equinox a Welcome Change in Weather Spring will finally officially be sprung this Thursday as our part of the Earth begins tilting toward our life-sustaining star. It’s easy to appreciate the change in seasons, but hard to understand why the weather changes from cold to hot to cold again. In fact, it’s just in the last 400 years that humans have figured out the rhythm of our seasons. Seasons happen only because the Earth is a little whacked over on its side. Instead of spinning like a toy top straight up and down, Earth is tilted 23.5 degrees with a little wobble. Something whacked us good in the early days of our Solar System, maybe ripping the Moon out of our sides. And it’s the Moon’s gravity that keeps us tilted the way we are, otherwise, we’d keep wobbling all over the place! We do wobble a little, completing a circle every 26,000 years—and changing North Pole stars in the process. The physics of the seasons is this: in the Summer our Northern Hemisphere is tilted toward the Sun, and in the Winter we are tilted away. Sunlight is hotter when striking a surface more direct than at an angle. Just feel the sun rays on your skin at 10 am, than again at 1 pm. The higher the Sun angle, the hotter, like around mid-day. That’s what’s happening this week, as Earth reaches a point in its orbit when the angle is between Winter and Summer. Called the equinoxes, the Spring and Autumn events welcome an equal day and night, with daylight getting longer as the Sun’s arc climbs higher northward. At the Vernal Equinox, the Sun crosses the imaginary line of the ecliptic from the south side to the north, and the Sun is directly overhead at noon. The farthest point northward happens around June 21, the Summer Solstice, and the farthest point southward against the celestial sphere is the Winter Solstice, around Dec. 21st. In between are the Spring and Autumn equi-

noxes. On Earth, the point where the Sun reaches these points are called the Tropic of Cancer and Tropic of Capricorn—each 23.5 degrees from the equator. So, during Winter, our hemisphere is tilted away from the Sun, the indirect rays not being very warm. But as we move in our orbit and begin to nod toward the Sun, we warm up. Keep in mind that the Southern Hemisphere experiences just the opposite seasons—so our Vernal Equinox is the first day of Autumn “Down Under” in Australia. People find it hard to believe that the Earth is actually farther away from the Sun in the summer, and closer to the Sun in the winter. That’s because we live with a Northern Hemisphere bias. The Earth will be farthest from the Sun, called aphelion, on July 3 at 94.5 million miles. We’re closest to the Sun, perihelion, in the first week of January at around 91.3 million miles. Now, a few facts about our Sun, after all, it’s the star of this Vernal Equinox show! Just an average star in many ways, our Sun is 865,370 miles across and is basically 99 per cent hydrogen. The Sun is so huge that is contains 99.86 per cent of everything in our Solar System. Incredibly, all the eight planets, all their moons, tens

of thousands of asteroids and millions of comets make up just 0.14 per cent of the mass in our star family! So, how hot is the Sun? The surface temperature is around 10,000 degrees F. But the center, where nuclear fission splits hydrogen atoms into stellar energy, the temperatures must approach 50 million degrees F. The surface we see of the Sun, the photosphere, is granular like boiling oatmeal. Electromagnetic storms create the dark and cooler sunspots, and flames of hydrogen lick off the surface, taking three days to reach Earth. These solar gases are magnetically drawn to the magnetic poles of planets Earth, Jupiter and Saturn and create glowing crowns of aurora. The Sun rotates once every 33 days with some variances at different latitudes. Like all stars, it emits many dangerous wavelengths of energy like ultraviolet and x-rays, most are blocked out by our atmosphere. But some of the UV rays sneak through; toasting gently our skin if exposed too long. Nothing travels faster than light, and those sunrays leave the surface of our favorite star at 186,000 miles a second, or about 670 million miles in an hour. Traveling the 93 million miles from the Sun’s

surface to Earth takes more than 9 minutes. So when you’re laying on the beach soaking up the Sun, you are looking back in time at our star. Want to see the Sun close up? It is being watched every minute of every day by four powerful space satellites and several major solar observatories on Earth. Check out the World Wide Web for the McMathPierce Solar Telescope at Kitt Peak in Arizona and Big Bear Solar Observatory in California.

In outer space are observatories in a permanent orbit a million miles ahead of the Earth and a million miles behind us at the “Lagrangian Points”. The two unique satellites revealing each side of the Sun are simply called Stereo A and Stereo B. The die-hard sun watcher is the orbiting Solar Heliospheric Observatory (SOHO), which began working in 1996 on a two-year mission that has lasted more than 18 years. But the real workhorse watching the Sun is the Solar Dynamic Observatory, costing $2 billion and providing the most detailed look at the Sun with its special instruments. All these great solar observatories have websites devoted to their images, and many are pictures of beauty as well as scientific data. Another great website to daily follow the Sun is Space Weather, which monitors the solar activity in layman’s terms. Enjoy our favorite star as it climbs higher in the sky each day, bringing Spring warmth and new vegetative growth to our Northern Hemisphere. And don’t forget to lather up with the sunscreen!


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Glasgow Theatre to present regional premiere of

‘Spring Awakening’

Glasgow Theatre Company will present the regional premiere of the highly acclaimed Tony Awardwinning musical Spring Awakening. The show will be performed Thursday and Friday, March 20 and 21, at 8 p.m. and Saturday, March 22, at 2 p.m. and 8 p.m. at Johnson City Community Theatre. Spring Awakening is set in late 19th century Germany and tells the story of a group of young people making their way through the thrilling, complicated and mysterious time of sexual awakening. The rock musical features music by Duncan Sheik with book and lyrics written by Steven Sater. The show made its Broadway debut in 2006 and played for over 800 performances. It claimed numerous Tony Awards and Drama Desk Awards, including Best Musical, Best Original Score, and Best Choreography. The original Broadway cast included actors Jonathan Groff and Lea Michele. The Glasgow cast includes Luke Bechtel, Kayla Bussell, Daniel Harr, Becky Harris, Jon Lut-

trell, Jonathan Marin, Hannah Miller, Nora Beth Moran, Richard Nave, Kody Rowe, Debra Shoun, Joe Smith and Michael Waterfield. Spring Awakening is directed by April Gardner, with Kaeli Gardner as music director, Chris Yoder as accompanist, and David Hyde as lighting designer. Spring Awakening is rated R and includes strong language,

adult themes and sexual content. Tickets are $10 each. For reservations, please call 423-588-0588. Johnson City Community Theatre is located at 600 E. Maple Street. This musical was funded from a grant from the Tennessee Arts Commision. There will be a talkback session after each evening performance.


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Kingsport Ballet Prepares for Busy Second Half of the 2014 Season As Kingsport Ballet prepares for its second big production of the season, The Sleeping Beauty at Eastman, it also prepares for a very active season finale. April through June packs in the majority of the school and company’s

activities, including a major fundraising event. The yearly Ballet and Bubbly, typically held at Chateau Selah, is an elegant evening of gourmet samplings, champagne and live contemporary dance and music performances. This year’s B&B will be taking place at Hibbert Davis Café on May 3rd in an effort to support local businesses and celebrate our community’s diversity with an international fare. The event raises funds for Kingsport Ballet’s outreach programs, DANCE CO and MOVE 1&2, which provide year-round fitness and dance instruction to underserved students. Tickets are $50 per person and it is open to the public. It is followed by the first of two spring concerts, May 4th, featuring the littlest students in the school. This Dance Movement Spring Concert takes place at the Renaissance Center Theater in Kingsport and provides an introductory performance experience to young students. The second Spring Concert, a performance showcase for the

whole school featuring original and classical choreography in various forms of dance including jazz and Modern, takes place on May 22nd at Wellmont Performing Arts Center, Northeast State. Following the showcase and a two week break, Kingsport Ballet presents its three-week Summer Intensive, June 9 through 27. This workshop brings in master teachers and choreographers from around the U.S. and provides full day and halfday instruction to students ages 7 and up. The curriculum is comprehensive and includes ballet, pointe and partnering (for eligible students), Jazz and Contemporary dance, yoga and Pilates, nutrition, history of ballet and much more. The program culminates with a Workshop Performance open to the public on Friday, June 27th at 3:30pm. Company dancers, who are required to attend two weeks of workshop for Company membership, typically attend all three weeks, and some also audition for further opportunities in competitive training programs away from home. Several Kingsport Ballet dancers ages 13-15 will be attend-

ing the Bolshoi Academy of Ballet in New York during the month of July. In past years Kingsport Ballet dancers have attended summer programs with the Kirov Academy, Gelsey Kirkland Academy, Houston Ballet, American Ballet Theater and Nutmeg Conservatory, among others. Another school tradition is the Father-Daughter Car Wash and block party which takes place June 21, 10-2, in the alley adjacent to the Kingsport Ballet facility. Tickets are pre-sold as well as sold on site. The event also features hot

dogs cooked on site, and other refreshments such as lemonade and homemade cookies provided free of charge to car wash customers. To learn more about Kingsport Ballet or to purchase tickets to their events call 423-378-3967 or log on to www.kingsportballet. org. Kingsport Ballet is funded in part by the Tennessee Arts Commission, under an agreement with the National Endowment for the Arts and the General Assembly. Outreach programs are funded by the Tennessee Arts Commission’s Funds for At Risk Youth, the Kingsport Community Foundation, the City of Kingsport, the Junior League of Kingsport, HEAL Appalachia, Holston Medical Group, among others (please see our website home page for a full listing of our sponsors)


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Four Color Culture: Comic Books and American History, 1938 - 2014 on display The Reece Museum on the campus of East Tennessee State University is pleased to present Four Color Culture: Comic Books and American History, 1938-2014. Curated by Ensley F. Guffey, Master’s Candidate in the Department of History at ETSU, Four Color Culture seeks to illuminate not only the history of mainstream American comic books, but also the ways in which comics have taken an active part in the political, social, and cultural life of the United States for the past seventysix years. From World War II, Korea, and Vietnam to racism, the Civil Rights Movement, and the campaigns for LGBT equality, to 9/11 and beyond, comics have always taken part in the national debate. Questioning, educating, challenging, and agitating, American comic books have never been

“just kids’ stuff.” Four Color Culture reveals comics’ ability to help shape American history yesterday, today, and tomorrow. Ensley F. Guffey is an author and historian of American popular culture. He received an AA form Cleveland Community College, a BA in History from the University of North Carolina at Greensboro, and is on course to earn an MA in American History from East Tennessee State University in May of 2014.He has presented papers at regional, national, and international academic conferences on topics ranging from the American industrialist Samuel Colt to the television show Breaking Bad, and he has published peer-reviewed scholarly essays on Babylon 5, Breaking Bad, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Farscape, and Marvel’s The Avengers. With his wife, K. Dale

Koontz, Ensley is the co-author of Wanna Cook? The Complete, Unofficial Companion to Breaking Bad, due to be released May 1, 2014, and currently available for pre-order. A reception for Four Color Culture will be held on Thursday, March 20, in the museum. On that same evening, students from the ETSU Master of Fine Arts Group Exhibition will hold their reception in the Reece Museum as well. Both receptions begin at 5:00 p.m. and end at 7:00 p.m., and are free and open to the public.


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Caravan of Thieves plays Northeast State March 20

Northeast State Community College welcomes Caravan of Thieves back to campus this month to interpret one of the best-loved albums of The Beatles. The marvelously theatrical and talented band plays a free live performance on Thursday, March 20 at 7 p.m. in the Wellmont Regional Center for the Performing Arts at the main campus in Blountville.

  A crowd-pleaser from last summer’s “Hot Nights, Cool Music” summer series returns with a very special tribute to the 50th Anniversary of the arrival of the Beatles in America in the form of a unique Caravan of Thieves interpretation of the entire “Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band” album. Don’t miss this incredible evening. You won’t experience anything quite

like this anywhere else in the TriCities.   Caravan of Thieves are musical and intense.  Driving gypsy jazz rhythms, acoustic guitars, upright bass and violin lay the foundation for the band’s mesmerizing vocal harmonies and fantastic stories.  They entertain, dazzle and defy musical classification while welcoming the crowd to join throughout the performance in momentary fits of claps, snaps and sing-alongs. Within the group’s first year, the Caravan of Thieves won immediate praise for their unique blend of gypsy swing and popular music, inspiring them to record and release the debut full-length album Bouquet. The band’s third release and second studio album, The Funhouse, broadens the Caravan of Thieves sound to include the kitchen sink, and then some.  Tunes like “Raise the Dead,” the record’s single, drive the point home with impressive lift, powered by soaring crescendos and inspired gang vocals, not to mention a lyric that invites the deceased to join in the fun. The concert is free and open to the public.  Doors open at 6:30 p.m.  For more information, contact 423.279.7668 or jpkelly@northeaststate.edu.


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The Official Blues Brothers Revue to Perform at NPAC on Sunday, March 23nd

Hold on... all of the Blues Brothers classics “Soul Man”, “Rubber Biscuit”, “Gimme Some Lovin”, and more... are on their way to NPAC. The Official Blues Brothers Revue will perform on Sunday, March 23rd at the Niswonger Performing Arts Center in historic downtown Greeneville, TN. The performance begins at 3:00 pm. Ticket prices range from $25 to $35. The characters of Jake and Elwood Blues, created by John Belushi and Dan Aykroyd in 1978, were initially imagined as frontmen for a fictitious American blues and soul band. Since their film debut in 1980, the irreverent characters have resonated with people around the world and the Blues Brothers have catapulted into a cultural phenomenon and musical, comedic, and cinematic legend. The Official Blues Brothers Revue, featuring Wayne Catania and Kieron Lafferty as Jake and Elwood, recreates the live concert experience, integrating the humor and songs from the original film and subsequent albums. Produced by Judy Belushi Pisano and Dan Aykroyd, the Revue pays homage to Chicago’s rich history or blues, soul music

and gospel in the true spirit of the original Blues Brothers. Under the direction of Paul Shaffer, Jake, Elwood and the high-energy eightpiece Intercontinental Rhythm & Blues Revue Band lay down a big sound, performed with the passion of the original Blues Brothers. Fun for all ages, The Official Blues Brothers Revue strikes the right balance of humor, music and mayhem. The Official Blues Brothers Revue will perform at Niswonger Performing Arts Center (NPAC) in historic downtown Greeneville, TN on Sunday, March 23rd at 3:00

pm. Tickets are $35 for orchestra and mezzanine level seating and $25 for balcony seats. Tickets may be purchased online at www. npacgreeneville.com, in person at the NPAC box office, or by calling 423-638-1679. NPAC offers online seat selection and no-fee ticketing. The box office hours are Monday through Friday, 10 am until 5 pm. The 1130 seat performing arts center is located adjacent to the campus of Greeneville High School in Greeneville, TN. For venue information, and to purchase tickets, please visit www.npacgreeneville.com.


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The Hillbilly Gypsies at the Carter Family Fold Saturday, March 22nd

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014, at 7:30 p.m. the Carter Family Fold in Hiltons, Virginia, will present a concert by the Hillbilly Gypsies. Admission to the concert is $10 for adults, $1 for children 6 to 11, under age 6 free. The Hillbilly Gypsies are a West Virginia native string band who specialize in playing their own homegrown style of Appalachian old time music, mixed with a hard drivin’ bluegrass sound. In addition to their original material, the Hillbilly Gypsies play a mix of traditional bluegrass and catchy old fiddle tunes. They are best appreciated at a live show. The Gypsies perform in the old fashioned style, around a single microphone. Their show has the feel of a barn dance, and it transports you back in time. One thing’s for sure – you’ll want to get up and dance. They’ve been a group for over ten years, and they have played at many national festivals, concert halls, and theaters. Formed from a chance meeting in 2001 in Morgantown, West Virginia, they have been pickin’ and grinnin’ ever since. Trae Buckner and Jamie Lynn Buckner, Jason Teel, Ty Jaquay, and Dave Asti are

the members of the group. Trae is featured on guitar and vocals. Jamie Lynn does both lead and harmony vocals. Jason does the bass fiddling for the group. Dave Asti plays banjo, and Ty does the fiddling. The Hillbilly Gypsies truly are a close knit family, mindful of tradition but boldly exploring new styles of acoustic music. For an evening of unforgettable old time, bluegrass, and traditional music; come out and see the Hillbilly Gypsies at the Carter Family Fold. Don’t forget to bring along your dancing shoes. Their gospel tunes are reminiscent of the old time tent meetings, and there will be music to suit everyone’s taste. Be prepared for an evening of high-energy, no holes barred family fun! To learn more about the Hillbilly Gypsies, go to their site at thehillbillygypsies.com/. Carter Family Memorial Music Center, Incorporated, is a nonprofit, rural arts organization established to preserve traditional, acoustic, mountain music. For further information on the center, go to www.carterfamilyfold.org. Shows from the Carter Family Fold can be accessed on the internet at www.carterfoldshow.com.


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The Stray Birds at Down Home

• In spring, the Earth’s axis is tilted toward the sun, increasing the number of daylight hours and bringing warmer weather that causes plants to bring forth new growth. • Tornado Alley is most active this time of year. • At the spring equinox, days are close to 12 hours long with day length increasing as the season progresses.

The Stray Birds will perform in Johnson City on Friday, March 21 at Down Home - www.downhome.com. Drawing upon the richness of American folk music traditions, the signature power of The Stray Birds sound lies in outstanding songwriting spun with a stirring subtlety and grace. The Stray Birds were born of a compelling collaboration between two unique writers and vocalists-- the pure, luxurious voice of Maya de Vitry and Oliver Craven’s richness of tone and depth of delivery. Grounding their sound in the unshakeable groove of bassist Charles Muench. Their full-length debut, The Stray Birds, was lauded by radio stations and listeners across the country and named to the Top 10 Folk/Americana Releases of 2012 by NPR. Passionate live performances led to appearances on NPR’s Mountain Stage, the Philadelphia Folk Festival, the Kerrville Folk Festival, and the Falcon Ridge Folk Festival.   Raised within a few miles of farmland from each other in Lancaster County, Pennsylvania, their flight began with friendship. With miles of music already behind them, Maya de Vitry and Oliver Craven first shared a song in January 2010. A snowy Pennsylvania winter welcomed collaboration between the two creative flames— and inspired the collection of

seven songs found on their first EP, Borderland. The meeting of kindred musical spirits is a fortunate encounter. But beyond the luck of blend and the intuition of breath comes the question of a fierce dedication to a collective craft. Two years passed, and three tables had been cleared. Charles Muench, who contributed upright bass to the  Borderland  EP, climbed on board as the third voice. The trio recorded a full-length album, packed a party of seven instruments into a station wagon, and set out to sing for an endless road of towns. The band maintains an ambitious touring schedule and revels in the energy of each room. Hailed by  No Depression  as “a band destined for global success,” The Stray Birds are slated to perform at the 2014 Celtic Connections festival in Scotland, and will follow that appearance with a monthlong tour of the United Kingdom and Ireland in addition to continued heavy touring in the US. The trio will release their 2nd  full-length album in Spring 2014.    “Super-talented acoustic trio whose virtuosity doesn’t get in the way of their soul. Rich vocal harmonies, tight acoustic arrangements, heart-wrenching songs.” — Fly Magazine - www.thestraybirds.com


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Spring Hike!

at Sycamore Shoals State Historic Area Saturday, March 22 • 1:00 pm Spring has Sprung at Sycamore Shoals State Park! Join retired forester Martin Miller, for a special guided tour of Sycamore Shoals’ new Tennessee Urban Forestry certified arboretum on Saturday, March 22.  Discover a variety of native trees and fun facts about their unique qualities, historical uses, and contributions to local culture.   Dress appropriately for the weather as we will be taking a casual stroll on the park grounds adjacent to the front parking lot.  Meet in the Visitor Center lobby, tour will begin at 1:00 pm. Please no pets. Tour is by reservation only and subject to cancellation due to significantly inclement weather. Contact the park for more information at 423543-5808. Sycamore Shoals St. Historic Area 1651 W. Elk Avenue, Elizabethton, TN 37643 www.sycamoreshoalstn.org www.tnstateparks.com/parks/about/sycamoreshoals

What’s HerStory? Shakti in the Mountains will be hosting a kick-off event for What’sHerStory? - an opportunity to collect, connect, and celebrate our stories and the stories of our foremothers - on Thursday, March 20th from 5 - 7 pm. This free event is the first in a series. These events will provide a chance for deeper connection to our roots. Participants will learn about the unique qualities of family members, both present and past. Oral histories will be collected for podcasts and other publications. Local musician Beth Snapp will perform at the March 20th event. She is a Northeast Tennessee native who blends native music, pop, jazz and spoken word into her music. For more information, contact Mel at (423( 341-5476 or admin@shaktiinthemountains.com


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5K fun run to benefit Hands & Feet Project Milligan College will host a 5K fun run to raise money for the Hands and Feet Project. The race will be held on Milligan’s campus and is scheduled to start at 9 a.m. Registration is $15 before the day of the race, and the fee increases to $20 on April 5. This is the second year that the Hands and Feet 5K will be hosted at Milligan. The Hands and Feet Project is a nonprofit organization whose mission is “to care for the orphaned and abandoned children of the world with the love of Christ.” Their current focus is to build villages of homes for children and missionaries in Haiti. Last year, Milligan student Alicen Simon found out about the Hands and Feet Project and was moved to do something in her community to help. She got a group of friends together to plan the 5K and was overwhelmed with the great response from the college and community. “I’m looking forward to the impact the students and the community have on this day,” said Simon, a psychology major. “I love watching people come and get excited about doing something great.” Kristal Dove, Milligan’s director of campus activities, said, “One of the things that I appreciate the most about the Hands and Feet 5K is that it is a studentinitiated, student-led event. The race is such a great picture of the servant hearts that exist within the students of the Milligan community.” Online registration is available at www.milligan.edu/handsandfeet. Participants who register before March 22 will receive a Tshirt. All proceeds from the race benefit the Hands and Feet Project. For more information, e-mail to milliganhaf5k@milligan.edu

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PHANTASMATICAL Painter communicates through beautiful, ugly honesty

When Anne Harris was a child, she loved to draw on sheets of butcher paper with her siblings and mother. If no paper were available, she would draw in the air. As Dr. Seuss would say, she drew and drew and drew. In first grade, she started drawing faces. “I became obsessed with pretty faces – pictures in magazines, cartoon stylizations of pretty faces, makeup … these waxy faced females … so I was making a face by drawing the surface mask – weirdly the same issues I’m still pondering.” Harris will share her ponderings, influences and process in a free artist talk Friday, March 21, at 7 p.m. in ETSU’s Ball Hall Auditorium with a Q&A and reception with the artist to follow. Nowadays, the art professor at TheSchool of the Art Institute of Chicago paints torsos, as well, and most often, the subject is some illusory image of herself. “To sum it up simplistically,” Harris said in National Portrait Gallery Face to Face blog, “I’ve been painting the same freaky self-portrait for the last twenty-five years.” Her freaky self-portraits with “ghoulish red-rimmed eyes” and “distortions of weirdly lit flesh” have been called “seductively beautiful and disturbingly ugly,” searing in honesty and brutally frank. In a 2013 exhibition in New York, Harris dubbed them “phantasmatical” – unreal and fantastic. “I tend, inevitably, to veer toward the grotesque, although I’m never aiming for that,” she told Huffington Post reviewer John Seed. “Really, my best paintings seem to happen between subtlety and

the grotesque ... I realize I’m trying to make a beautiful painting of a subject many won’t consider beautiful.” ETSU painting Professor Mira Gerard has followed Harris’ work for years and interviewed her in December for Figure/ Ground Communication. Gerard does find beauty in the technique, if not always the topic and thinks the ETSU community will also. “I think her paintings are hard not to love, even if the imagery seems bizarre,” Gerard says. “They’re so beautifully crafted. There’s so much luminosity in her tonal shifts and the way she handles the light on the flesh of the figures. They are just gorgeous paintings … “If somebody thought the paintings were weird I would say, ‘What if instead of being something that is calming and pretty, you think about the work in the way you would think about a really complex book you would read or a song that puts you in a mood?’ Sometimes people think about paintings and they want them to be very pleasing and pretty … A movie can be scary. Why can’t a painting be considered scary? Maybe a painting can be something other than one idea.” Harris and her psychological self-portraits can bring much to the conversation, says Anita DeAngelis, director of Mary B. Martin School of the Arts, co-sponsor with ETSU’s Department of Art & Design. “The artists we help Art & Design bring to speak are often discussed or included for instructional purposes in classrooms or artists who are on the cutting edge or getting some attention in the contemporary art world,” DeAngelis says. “Anne Harris serves in both capacities – and she is not only a wellknown painter but also a longtime art educator.” Harris, who holds a bachelor of fine arts from Washington University in St. Louis and an MFA from Yale, indeed proffers a rich résumé. She has participated in more than 100 solo and group exhibitions. Exhibitions from the past year include her solo exhibition Phantasmatical: Self Portraits, at Alexandre Gallery in New York; the OBPC exhibition at the National Portrait Gallery; The Female Gaze: Women Artists Making Their World, at the PAFA Museum; and The Mind’s I, a collaborative drawing project organized by Harris at Julius Caesar Gallery, Chicago. She also teaches in the BFA and MFA programs at SAIC and lives in Riverside, Ill., just outside Chicago.


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Continuted from previous Page

She brings “touches of the Old Masters” to her work and to discussions of art, with a love for art regardless of time period, as long as, she says, “it mesmerizes.” “I make it a point, when teaching, to discuss all art as contemporary, that it all exists now,” Harris said in her interview with Gerard. “That paintings can be widely diverse in subject matter and yet offer a similar experience, be about something fundamentally akin. So, at the AIC, I’ll take my students to see the [Dieric] Bouts Sorrowing Madonna, and we’ll then go see an Ad Reinhardt black painting and will talk about the commonalities.” This breadth of knowledge, understanding and perspective will benefit all who come to the Friday evening talk, as well as studio and classroom visits while Harris is in town, Gerard says. “Anne has a gift of being able to communicate ideas about looking more deeply at art and she will be able to talk to students in such a way that they might bring that back to where they are sitting in art history class or in a museum and just slow down and unpack the mysteries of great work,” she says. “That is such a valuable thing and as a young student it was probably the most important thing that helped me grow … She has a way of communicating ideas that is compelling.” Although, it is not all pretty, expected and/or classical, the Chicago painter has a lot to communicate, in her work and in her discussions online and in person. “I hope the work produces questions, instead of just answers,” Harris said in an interview with Blouin Art Info at Phastasmatical. “We actually had a student in Advanced Painting

Studio here who asked, in his final crit, if his paintings were answers or questions – a brilliant way to begin a critique. My hope is that mine function as questions – that they leave you wondering. “The meaning is going to come from the conversation it has with you.”   For information about the ETSU Mary B. Martin School of the Arts or the artist talk, call 423-439-TKTS (8587) or visit www.etsu. edu/martin. “Like” ETSU Mary B. Martin School of the Arts on Facebook and follow it on Twitter and Instagram @ArtsAtETSU.


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Alfred Hitchcock’s

The Birds

Make-A-Wish® Month at Applebee’s March is Make-A-Wish® Month for East Tennessee area Applebee’s. Put your name with the Stars at your neighborhood Applebee’s by making a donation of your choice with your meal purchase. Enjoy a Brownie or Blondie Bite, during any day in the month of March, for $2 and we’ll make a $2 donation to help “Share the Power of a Wish®”. With your help a check for $100,000 was donated last year. This year, your donation will help make the wish of local children battling a life-threatening medical condition come true. Events you can participate in to help us reach our goal. Pancake Breakfast’s – 7:30 - 10am $5.00 donation

Saturday, March 22: •• 2912 Knoxville Center Drive Knoxville, TN 37924 •• 1010 Overmountain Drive Elizabethon, TN 37643 Sunday, March 23: •• 356 Northgate Mall Chattanooga, TN 37415-6922 (Hixon) Saturday, March 29: •• 1661 East Stone Drive Kingsport, TN 37660 •• 2328 W. Andrew Johnson Hwy Morristown, TN 37814 •• 425 Volunteer Pkwy Bristol, TN 37620 Check us out on Facebook and follow our progress: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Make-A-Wish-East-Tennessee/177426717247

to Play at Real-to-Reel Alfred Hitchcock’s acclaimed suspense film, The Birds, will play Thursday, March 27, at Real-to-Reel Theaters for one night only at 7 p.m. Tickets will be $3.   The film centers on a wealthy San Francisco socialite who pursues a potential boyfriend to a small Northern California town that slowly takes a turn for the bizarre when birds of all kinds suddenly begin to attack people there in increasing numbers and with increasing viciousness (IMDb.com). The 1963 film was nominated for an Academy Award for special effects. It won a Golden Globes award for “most promising newcomer” for Tippi Hedren. The Birds is part of a series of Hitchcock films being shown at ETSU as part of a film studies course. Contact: Michael Brigg briggsm@etsu.edu Department of Literature and Language ETSU, PH: 423-439-5996/4314


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The City of Kingsport Office of Cultural Arts Presents

The Carousel Fine Craft Show and Brass Ring Gala March 21-23, 2014 at the Kingsport Farmer’s Market

Tickets for the Brass Ring Gala are $35 each and gain the bearer to attendance all weekend long. Tickets to the Carousel Fine Craft Show are $7 for both Saturday and Sunday and $5 for one day only. The Brass Ring Gala and Carousel Fine Craft Show made their debut last year to rave reviews. This year the Gala and Show return with double the number of fine craft exhibitors and the newest of Kingsport’s Carousel animals and art will be on display. The Brass Ring Gala will be on Friday, March 21 from 6 PM- 9 PM and the Carousel Fine Craft Show will continue on Saturday and Sunday from 10 AM – 5 PM both days. The Kingsport Carousel Project has captured the imagination of the region and will soon break ground for the Pal’s Roundhouse

which will house the 1956-vintage Herschel Carousel. Though much care and artistry have gone into each facet of the carousel, this is a working ride and children of all ages (and their parents and grandparents) will enjoy this destination for generations. To honor the amazing work of the carvers, painters and machinists who work so diligently and with such care on the Carousel, the Brass Ring Gala will kick-off the weekend of celebration and shopping. “My New Favorites” will return to offer a toe tapping musical array, heavy hors d’ouevres and a cash bar will be available. This is the perfect time to celebrate with the volunteers of the carousel who have carved frogs, elephants, horses and tigers and to the painters many of whom painted these platform animals and also paintedthe Rounding Boards and Bird Features. The Carousel’s working Band Organ will be on display and played over the course of the weekend. Who can resist the merry waltzes and polkas!

The finest artists and artisans of the region join in the celebration and offer the Tri-Cities a chance to explore true treasures and the people who make them. Weavers, woodworkers, porcelain and pottery will share the stage with fine furniture and amazing jewelry. Support these amazing artists and invest in a legacy. The Brass Ring Gala and Carousel Fine Craft Show take place at the Kingsport Farmer’s Market located on Clinchfield and Center Streets in Kingsport, TN. The Farmer’s Market is quickly becoming and entertainment and event destination and the up-coming colocation of the Carousel and its adjacent park will further enhance its amenities. Art and artists provide the framework of a creative community. Tickets are available by calling the Kingsport Office of Cultural Arts at 423-392-8414, in person in room 224 of the Renaissance Arts Center and online at www.EngageKingsport.com


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Skies This Week Celestial events in the skies for the week of Mar. 18th - Mar. 24th, 2014, as compiled for The Loafer by Mark D. Marquette.

Spring has sprung! The 24.5 degree tilt of the Earth causes the Sun’s arc across the sky to move from north to south, than south to north in our skies. The Sun is headed northward to its farthest point north on June 21, the Summer Solstice. The Vernal Equinox used to occur on March 20th or 21st. The celestial nuances of our solar orbit will move the date to just March 20th until 2044 when the first day of Spring will sometimes fall on March 19th.

Tues. March 18

On this 1965 date in space history, Alexei Leonov, 79, took the world’s first space walk outside the Voskhod 2 spaceship. Watching inside the spaceship was cosmonaut Pavel Belyayev. Leonov also commanded the Soviet spaceship that docked with an Apollo manned spacecraft in 1975, and is a Russian national hero.

Wed. March 19

The Moon teams up with Mars in the after-midnight skies, directly south at around 4 am. Mars is red, and the other white star near the Moon is Spica in Virgo the Virgin.

Thurs. March 20

Vernal Equinox is today as the Sun enters Aries the Ram…and the long, hard winter is over. Seen from the equator, the Sun is directly overhead at noon, and around the world there are an equal 12 hours of daylight and 12 hours of night.

Fri. March 21

The Moon moves next to Saturn, so close that it passes in front of the planet as seen from Asia. In our early morning skies, the pair arises just after midnight in the claws of Scorpius.

Sat. March 22

On this 1997 date in astronomy, the world was abuzz as Comet HaleBopp was closest to Earth and an easy naked eye sight in the evening skies.

Sun. March 23

On this 1840 date in astronomy, the first photo of the Moon through a

telescope was made by William Draper on a silver platinum photographic plate. Just 174 years later, most of us have a digital camera on our cell phones that will take a great Moon photo through any telescope.

Mon. March 24

Jupiter is no letting to its hold on the night, as it pokes through the twilight at 8 pm, the planet being the brightest of the many bright stars in the sky. The winter constellations still dominate—Orion, Canis Major, Gemini, Taurus and Auriga among them.


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14th Annual Heroes Ball set in Viking Hall

The City of Bristol hosts an event each year that brings out our local heroes to enjoy a little friendly competition. This year the Heroes Ball is going to take on a couple of new twists. The American Red Cross will be the beneficiary of this year’s event proceeds.

“The American Red Cross is a perfect fit for us. They partner with us throughout the year on fire scenes where families are left homeless and insure that the families have a place to stay, food and hygiene items,” said Asst. Chief Jack Spurgeon with Bristol Fire and Rescue.

For weeks prior to the game each of the four teams has the opportunity to practice on the home court at Viking Hall. The winning teams take the prized trophy back to their departments to be displayed for the year. MVP’s are selected from the two games and these players are awarded an individual trophy. The games will take place on Friday, March 21st at 7:00pm. The public is invited to attend. A $3 dollar donation is suggested at the Another change in the line-up door. Come out and cheer-on your is the teams. The Bristol Virginia favorite hero while helping those Sherriff’s Department will be in need. For more information contact playing the Bristol Fire and Rescue while the Bristol Tennessee Darlene Cole, Venues Manager for Police Department will be going the city at 423-764-4171 or up against the Bristol Virginia Po- e-mail dcole@bristoltn.org lice Department.

Local Harley-Davidson Dealership Recognized Black Wolf Harley-Davidson was awarded Harley-Davidson Motor Company’s Silver Bar & Shield Circle of Achievement award for the 2013 calendar year. Black Wolf Harley-Davidson earned the Silver Circle of Achievement award for the Central region based on their motorcycle and related product sales performance, an evaluation of customer service and satisfaction, and various operational measures. “One of the primary reasons the Harley-Davidson brand has such tremendous customer loyalty is because of the efforts of dealers such as Charlie Cole and John

Ward,” said Mike Kennedy, Vice President and Managing Director of Harley-Davidson North American Region. “We’re really proud to have Charlie Cole and John Ward as part of the Harley-Davidson family.” Black Wolf Harley-Davidson, 1061 Old Abingdon Highway, has been in business in the Bristol, VA area since 2005.


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“300: Rise of an Empire” Ancient Greek warriors are back on the big screen in the new film “300: Rise of an Empire”. The film is a companion for the original “300” film, as the story take place, before, during and after the timeline of the original. The story is the fictional account of the Battle of Salamis, and is based on the yet-to-be-released graphic novel “Xerxes” by Frank Miller. The film begins with the story, as told by Queen Gorgo (Lena Headey), of the origin of “GodKing” Xerxes (Rodrigo Santoro). You could say Xerxes turned to the dark side after Greek General Themistocles (Sullivan Stapleton) kills his father during an epic battle between the Greeks and Persians. Xerxes is eventually convinced by the devious Persian naval commander Artemisia (Eva Green) that he can be greater than his father, and convinces the grieving son to take a  journey to the desert. Upon his return from the desert, Xerxes is  the GodKing we all know from the first film.  Soon  Artemisia convinces Xerxes he must seek revenge for the death of his father by declaring war against the Greeks. This is the point in the story where the film runs parallel with the “300” timeline. After we learn of the death of King Leonidas and the brave 300 Spartans, the film moves the story forward with epic battles on the sea between the naval forces of the Greeks and Persians. The Persian forces are led by Artemisia, and she is out to spill all the blood she can, even as she hopes to convince General Themistocles to join her. The film ends with the battle still raging, with Themistocles being joined with the army of Queen Gorgo, who has taken up a sword to join the battle. The film is rentlentless action wise, and is a perfect follow up to the original film. I saw the film in 3-D, and while you don’t need to

see the film in the format, it was a fun experience. Concerning the acting, while Sullivan Stapelton is no Leonidas, he is still a formidable screen presence. The real highlight for me was Eva Green, who practically slithers off the screen as the vicious naval commander. Her character belongs in a cinematic villain hall of fame, as she overshadows the powerful Xerxes, which is not an easy task. “300: Rise of an Empire” is an epic fantasy war film that left me wanting more. (Rated R) B+


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Starstruck! The Country Concert at the Southwest Virginia Higher Education Center

Starstruck! The country tribute concert is scheduled on Saturday, March 29 at 7:30 p.m. at the Southwest Virginia Higher Education Center featuring outstanding entertainers. Visit http://youtu. be/E2FgvizxuTU for a preview of performances. Impersonators are listed below: Garth Brooks (Dean Simmons) Shania Twain (Kelly Smith) Wynonna Judd (Wynonah Dove) Johnny Cash (David Burney) Tickets are available online at www.cpe.vt.edu/reg/swvac. The cost for a reserved table for eight is $270.00 and individual tickets

are $35.00 each. A sponsorship of $300.00 includes a reserved table for eight plus extra amenities. All sponsor fees and profit from the concert benefits the scholarship fund for students attending Virginia Tech from southwest Virginia. For additional information or to purchase tickets, contact Penny McCallum, Director, Virginia Tech Southwest Center at (276) 619-4311 or pmccallum@swcenter. edu; Dove Bush at (276) 619-4310 or dbush@swcenter.edu; or Brenda Justus (2760 619-4310 at bjustus@ swcenter.edu.


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Newton & Thomas To Perform at The Down Home March 19

Newton & Thomas are set to take their exciting stage show to The Down Home, 300 W. Main St., Johnson City on Wednesday, March 19 at 8:00 pm. Tickets are $14 general admission and can be purchased at the door. The group, led by Mark Newton and Steve Thomas, bring with them years of musical experience, a Grammy nomination, a CMA nomination and multiple IBMA awards. Newton & Thomas can also be seen and heard Wednesday, March 19 on: WJHL TV (CBS) Daytime Tri-Cities with host Morgan King (9:00 am); Live on WCYB TV News 5 at Noon (12:50 pm), and on the air at WETS Radio’s Americana Express show (4:00 pm). Newton & Thomas are celebrating their hit album REBORN (Pinecastle Records) that includes the hit single, “Old McDonald Sold The Farm.” The song spent all last year topping the bluegrass radio charts - reaching #1 four times on Bluegrass Today’s Top 20 Song Chart, climbing as high as #5 on Sirius XM Radio’s Bluegrass Junction Most Played Tracks, and appearing in Bluegrass Unlimited Magazine’s Top 30 Songs chart with the album in the Top 15 Album chart as well. “Old McDonald Sold The Farm” was also been released as a music video that spent numerous weeks at #1 on Yallwire’s Top 10 Most Watched Bluegrass Music Videos and at #13 on Yallwire’s Top 100 Most Watched Videos in All Genres last year. The video can be viewed at on youtube, yallwire. com, the band’s website and many other locations. For more information, please visit NewtonandThomas.com and follow them on Twitter and  Facebook.

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The Unnecessary Complications of a Simple Task My brain can be a little methodical. Not to mention that as I’ve gotten older, I’ve developed this tendency to over think things. I used to not be this way, I used to be a somewhat impulsive person who would quickly make his mind up. The most notorious example of this, in my family, is the time I bought a full sized pinball machine at a yard sale. This was back when I was a young lad of 17, and requested help from my family in hauling it. My mother came very close to ending my life. The reason why I bring this up is that I recently underwent a task that I’ve only done two other times in my life, thinning out my home video library. For the majority of my life on this planet, I’ve always had something of a sizable movie collection. I’m a film geek, and if there’s anything a film geek likes more than talking about movies, it’s talking about their home collections. Even as a kid, I owned several films on VHS tape. The shelves of my bedroom were full of movies, one shelf devoted entirely to The Three Stooges. I thought it was perfectly normal to want to own, and curate,

a nice movie collection. It’s why I always felt strange visiting the homes of friends, and finding that outside of their home movies, they maybe only owned about 10 movies. I would stare at the tiny shelf, usually to the side of the TV, or in the TV entertainment cabinet, and think to myself “10? That’s not possibly enough? Who owns only 10?” Then as I became a teenager into a young adult, I realized that it was not quite the norm in most homes to have large quantities of movies sitting around the place. As the VHS tapes were packed away and replaced with DVDs, and now Blu-Ray discs, there comes a time, usually every few years, when you suddenly wake up one morning and think “I should do some thinning out.” The seed for this idea was planted when last Fall, I was cleaning out my basement and forgot that I had some boxes of DVDs and VHS tapes in storage. Taking a break from clearing out enough wreaths to stock a Michael’s, I opened the boxes and looked. There were titles I forgot I owned, sorta thought I had, thought I had thinned out

once before, and ones that I literally had not watched since I was in high school. This is where my methodical mind kicks in and it becomes a task that takes days, uses flow charts, and a log book of every title. First you just dive into the boxes and see what exactly is there. You know some of these titles were placed into storage for a reason. Then you find some things that you simply can’t get rid of for sentimental reasons. Granted, I’m something of a sentimental person to begin with, but all those Three Stooges VHS tapes I was talking about? I still have them all, in a box. Why? Because my late grandparents bought me those. Y’know, reasons. I like to thin out by the rule of the threes: yes, no, and maybe. The yes pile is the pile where my instincts immediately click in and tell me to keep it. “Why I forgot I owned the complete run of the be-

loved British sitcom Blackadder, we’re keeping that!” The same works for the no pile, “Oh, a copy of Julie & Julia that I was given as a Christmas gift. That was the movie I saw on that really horrible date. I can get rid of that.” The maybe pile is where the real hell begins. The maybe pile is where I have 20 minute conversations with myself trying to determine if I want to keep something or not. The titles that fall into here include the ones that I’m considering upgrading to blu-ray, or the ones that I’ve partially upgraded to blu-ray. An example of this is the David Scuhet Poirot series. I’ve owned episodes of that on almost every format it was released on. VHS, then DVD, and now BluRay. The Blu-Rays are amazingly clear new masters made from the 16mm negatives. The show looks the best it ever has, but I’ve only gotten two of the seasons on that

format. “I mean, at some point I’m gonna get the other titles, but what if I want to watch the ones I don’t have? It is on Netflix, but still...” that type of thing. That’s what goes on my brain, and after the use of vein digram, I put my DVDs of the show aside. For some this wouldn’t be the labor intensive task, but for me, thinning out my library of my beloved movies and TV series is not a simple yes and no affair. It gets done, and whatever I thin out will soon be replaced with some new titles. It’s a cycle, but I am a film geek, and I love my movies, so it’s always gonna be a sizable amount. See you next week.


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Spring Cleaning: A Shade of Grey, a Birthday, and a Quiz In case you’re wondering, my title doesn’t refer to the already-writtenabout-enough Fifty Shades of Grey novel (hope you’re not disappointed), but to the fact that this week I am doing a little spring cleaning by writing about three different topics that, by themselves, probably don’t merit an entire column. From time to time I like to do this grab-bag sort of thing, especially in the spring. So, here goes. First, let’s get the grey thing out of the way. In the February 6, 2014 edition of Reviewed.com, columnist David Kender informs us that “Grey Is The Color Of The Future.” So, I guess we should be prepared to see this rather neutral and unexciting color a lot this year. His column specifically

focuses on kitchen décor, such as cabinets and appliances, but he implies that grey will be the color of a whole host of things this year. And so does MasterBrand Cabinets’ Executive VP of Marketing Cindy Hahn, who tells us that grey is “clean and simple” and that in the two rooms that are the hygienic centers of most homes—the kitchen and the bathroom—a neutral color like grey “evokes cleanliness without the sterility of an all-white room.” Grey also compliments other colors and therefore won’t clash with your décor of choice. In fact, according to Kender, the National Kitchen & Bath Association (NKBA) believes “grey will be the fastest growing color scheme for kitchens and baths in 2014.” We can only hope this trend won’t make the novel any more popular than it already is. And why is grey destined to be the Color Of The Year? Maria Stapperfenne, the upcoming NKBA president, theorizes that “The last time the industry was headed toward grey color schemes was in 2000. Then we had 9/11. Grey represented the future, and our nation felt insecure about the future. We turned around and looked backwards, using blues and greens, earth and water tones.” Now that we are living in a post-9/11 world, Stapperfenne believes our new confidence in the future will, particularly now that the Twin Towers have been replaced with a new iconic structure, make grey once again the color that best represents our future. For some reason, that makes no sense at all, but who am I to question a NKBA president-elect? Sounds a lot like the Amazing Criswell’s infamous prediction in “Plan 9 From Outer Space” that the future is where we will be spending the rest of our lives. In any event, I suppose I will be wearing more grey this year. And it’s really too bad I don’t drive my grey 1997 Toyota Camry anymore. But I am very happy that one of our cats is grey. Next up is a very important birthday. Hard as it is to believe, last Wednesday marked the 25th anniversary of the World Wide Web, thanks to its inventor Sir Tim Berners-Lee (who

apparently beat Al Gore to the punch). In his Vimeo commemorative address, he asks us to “Imagine the world if the World Wide Web were turned off.” Sir Tim goes on to make a plea for the freedom of the web--a plea that is particularly relevant in light of the fears surrounding the activities of the NSA, Edward Snowden, and others. You can learn more about these interests and how you can best commemorate the Web’s 25th anniversary by consulting webat25.org. I urge you to contemplate the question of what the world would be like if the Web were turned off. Although there are many on the planet today who cannot remember what the world was like before the Web, there are others like me who have one foot in the pre-Web universe and one planted in the here-and-now. I have difficulty imagining life before the existence of online reality, and don’t relish having to spend lots of time looking things up. As I have written before, the advent of online reality has eliminated the need for us to “go to” something to learn about a topic. Used to be (i.e. 25 years ago) that we had to physically “go to” the library, a friend, an encyclopedia, or phone to discover the answer to a question. Today, we don’t have to go anywhere, because the source of our information is with us at all times. Even in the early days of online reality, we had to “go to” a desktop to find something on the Web. Today, of course, we carry our “desktop” in our back pockets. So, this week you can either thank or blame Sir Tim Berners-Lee for the world he has given us. Our third little spring cleaning item has to do with one of my favorite topics—the ever-presence of self-help and happiness advice. While looking around the aforementioned online playground I came across a site called The Happiness Project, the brainchild of author Gretchen Rubin. Seems like Ms. Rubin is determined to make us all happy—a quest joined by countless other self-help gurus and motivational speakers who insist we

must always strive to make our lives better, with the elusive goal of selffulfillment always being just out of reach. For a really neat corrective to this kind of thinking, along with a historical overview of its development, I urge you to consult Barbara Ehrenreich’s marvelous and enlightening book, Bright-Sided: How The Relentless Promotion Of Positive Thinking Has Undermined America (2009). Self-help promoters have an annoying habit (interestingly enough, habits are the subject of Rubin’s forthcoming book) of classifying everyone into categories that can easily adapt themselves to the curricula of pricey seminars and workshops. Rubin says “I sort everyone into four categories, which describe how people tend to respond to expectations: outer expectations (a deadline, a ‘request’ from a sweetheart) and inner expectations (write a novel in your free time, keep a New Year’s resolution).” The four personality categories that correspond to the two expectations are: Upholders (people who “respond readily to outer and inner expectations”), Questioners (people who never take anything at face value without examining various claims), Rebels (people who refuse to take all this self-help stuff seriously), and Obligers (nice people who will accept anything just to avoid conflict). I took Rubin’s online quiz and guess what? I am basically a Questioner with rebellious tendencies. Surprised? In any event, I do believe there are kernels of truth in most self-help programs, but if you tried to adapt to and follow the advice of even a handful of the programs currently on the market, you would end up with no identify whatsoever and would be a reasonably unhappy person. With those little tidbits of spring cleaning out of the way, I will bid you a fond farewell until next week. In the meantime, wear a grey outfit, go to Sir Tim’s miraculous invention, and take Rubin’s Upholder-Questioner-RebelObliger quiz. And try to be happy, in a grey sort of way.


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The Loafer, Mar. 18, 2014