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April NO. 10

Its Championship Football Again

We sum up the season so far

Circus With a Purpose Raising both smiles and money for charity

Take A Look Online

Read more stories and news online on our new website. 01642 759064

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Welcome to the April Edition of

“The Eye Magazine”

In This Month’s Issue 67-year-old coast to coast walker reaches Saltburn, Page 4 Passing of an old friend, Page 10 Hazards of Parking, Page12 The meaning of obscure words, Page 20 Modern equivalent to a freak show, Page 28

Plus Much More... The Eye is delivered monthly to over 11,800 homes in Redcar, Marske, Saltburn, Guisborough & East Cleveland.


Following the untimely death of Ashok Kumar there is a hint of sadness in this month’s edition. As well as including Ashok’s obituary we have also found it necessary to mourn the passing of both common sense in society and any potential Middlesbrough had of returning to the ‘promised land’ of the Premiership – for next season anyway! That we have tried to temper the latter piece with our usual sense of optimism would probably suggest we watch football through rose tinted spectacles but that, surely, is a necessary attribute of all ‘Boro fans! In general, then, it is probably fair to say that 2010 has not been particularly kind to the area so far. We are sure, however, that an Englishman’s inherent ability to both conquer problems and adapt to even the worst circumstances could well see things improve in the foreseeable future. We sincerely hope so. Happy reading!

Visit our website

You can now read our publication and past issues online on our website. You can now also read all our stories plus many more through our website. You can also submit your own stories for others to read.

Photographs wanted

You can now submit photos into our online photo gallery on our website. The Eye is published by Media Eye (NE) Ltd, Unit 116, Innovation Centre, Corfu Way, Kirkleatham Business Park, Redcar, TS10 5SH. Tel: 01642 759064. Whereas all care is taken to ensure that advertisers adhere to advertising codes of practice and are of good standing, the publisher accepts no responsibility for any statement, error or omission in any advisement or editorial matter. Advertisements have been accepted in good faith but this does not imply that the advertisers have The Eye magazine’s endorsement and no guarantee can be given by The Eye. Whilst we make every effort to identify the copyright of photographs, the lapse of time invariably makes it impossible to credit individual pictures. No part of this publication may be reproduced without the prior written permission of the publisher © The Eye. The content and opinions expressed in articles published in The Eye magazine are those of the contributor and are not necessarily the view of the publisher.


Hair Design, Beauty & Nail Room 8 Coatham Road, Redcar Spring is traditionally the time for new beginnings - from lambs in the field & spring flowers, to new wardrobes & new looks.

After the Winter it is also a time to boost your ego. Pop in and discuss a new look for your hair. Lee is back from maternity leave and will join all our stylists in creating something special at a very competitive price! Or perhaps you would rather treat your self to an eyelash perm & tint or gorgeous relaxing manicures & pedicures. We look forward to seeing you soon.

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67-year-old coast-to-coast walker reaches Saltburn A 67-year-old coast-to-coast walker Kate Hardcastle was cheered when she reached Saltburn pier at the end of her 97-mile trek from Morecambe, Lancashire. A group of a dozen well-wishers was there to welcome her after she walked the last leg of her journey, during which she "planted" purple balloons every mile of the walk. Kate, a retired teacher, tied No. 97 to the pier for her "big strong brother" Terry in whose memory she had made the trek for Pancreatic Cancer UK. He was one of the 97 per cent who don't survive the cancer hence the number of miles on the 11-day walk. Kate, 67, undertook it in memory of him and her mother who died of the disease aged 90. "I've tied balloons to lamp-posts, bridges, pubs and churches every mile of the trek. Each balloon tells the story of someone

who failed to survive this terrible disease which has the lowest amount of any cancer in research spending," said Kate, who walked with her collie Goldie, also clad in purple. She estimated she had raised at least £1,500 for her charity during the walk in both online donations (www.justgiving. com/katehardcastle2) or through cash put in her collecting tin. Kate can be contacted on 01524 823080 or through or by email

World-class Photographic exhibition comes to Saltburn. March the 5th sees the launch of a new exhibition at Profile Gallery, of a body of work by the international acclaimed photographer Weegee, coming to Teesside for the first time.

Bob Mitchell of Profile Gallery explains how such an exhibition of such importance has found its way to Saltburn: “Before we started we were always huge admirers of Side Gallery and their commitment to documentary photography. Amber has an extensive archive including one of the best collections of Weegee’s work in the world. Amber were very complimentary to what we were trying to achieve at Profile and offered to lend us the collection”. The exhibition launches at the Profile Gallery at 7-9pm on 5th March and runs until the 5th June. 30 images will be on display including images of this larger than life photographer with the likes of Andy Warhol and Salvador Dali to name just a few. Not one to be missed! Profile Gallery, 14 Ruby Street, Saltburn-by-the-sea. Cleveland. TS12 1EG. PAGE 4




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The circus with a purpose is coming to Middlesbrough Circus Starr arrives in Middlesbrough on Thursday 22nd April 2010 to raise both smiles and money for Butterwick House Children’s Hospice. The circus is a magical mix of top flight acrobatics, breathtaking balancing and non-stop comedy. It’s laughter all the way with the hilarious antics of Duo Delbosq whose infectious style of physical comedy knows no boundaries of language or age when it comes to pure entertainment. The outstanding Argentinean Gaucho, as featured on the Paul O’Grady Show, with the famed Bolas Dance of Courage set to wow any audience. In addition Tracy Jones brings grace, skill and sheer beauty to the world class line up with her International acclaimed Corde Lisse act.

Circus Starr occupies a unique position in British circus by raising thousands of pounds for local charities with the advance sales of show tickets to local businesses. The donations from those sales go towards specialised equipment for hospitals and hospices. Since proudly taking to the road 23 years ago, Circus Starr has raised more than £2 million for local charities. The circus will be in Middlesbrough, Prissick Sports Ground, Marton Road, with two shows at 4.45pm and 7pm.

Coffee break humour

A plane passed through a severe storm and the turbulence was awful. Things went from bad to worse when one wing was struck by lightning. One woman lost it completely. She stood at the front of the plane and screamed, “I’m too young to die but if I have to go I want my last minutes on earth to be memorable! Is there a man on this plane who can make me feel like a woman?” For a moment, there was silence as everyone stared at the desperate woman. Then a Redcar man stood up in the rear of the plane. He was handsome, tall, well built, with dark brown hair and hazel eyes. Slowly, he started to walk up the aisle, unbuttoning his shirt as he went one button at a time. No one moved. He removed his shirt. Muscles rippled across his chest and then he spoke... “Here love, Iron this and then get me a beer.” Two cows in a field and one says to the other ‘What do you think about this mad cow disease?’ The other said ‘It doesn’t bother me, I’m a duck.’ PAGE 6


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Vera Baird pays tribute to Ashok Kumar "I had the privilege to have known Ashok since the late 80's when we were both Labour Party activists in the North East. "He told me he was proud of having been selected for Middlesbrough South and East Cleveland on the day that Nelson Mandela was released from prison in South Africa. He was Labour through and through and talked of the Thatcher era as turning Teesside into a spoil area like the battle of the Somme, due to the closures and starved public services and Teessiders as walking wounded "The last time we spent a significant amount of time together was back in December when we were both part of a team of local MP's who went to see Gordon Brown to discuss the future of the Corus plant in Redcar. It was a long trip and Ashok was in fine form, you could see how much the future of the plant meant to him. His contacts with Tata were important in the current campaign to keep our steelworks working. He was able to keep communication channels open and was always satisfied that Tata would keep the works if it could, a balance to the concerns many people had locally about whether Corus were so committed. "I worked with him on many issues of joint interest for our constituencies. For instance Cleveland Potash which is in his constituency but where quite a lot of Marske, New Marske and Redcar people work. His scientific knowledge was helpful to me in following the impact of, for example, their proposed development of polyhalite a new mineral. At a different time he became worried about how Teesside Development Corporation had operated and I was able to direct his concerns, though my legal knowledge, to the Serious Fraud Office to which I sent a report PAGE 8

which they looked at and cleared. "He was a scientist who always wanted to get down to facts and certainties about an issue and when he was sure of them he was as tenacious as a bulldog in pursuing the cause. "It is a loss for Parliament but a devastating one for his constituents, for whom he was a first-rate constituency MP. He was very committed to his constituents and had a very high contact rate with them personally. Recently his office collected an award from the Northern Labour Party regional conference because of that high rate of keeping in touch "Though he was a very serious, calm and sensible person, when he relaxed he could be quite amusing. Dari and I used to tease him and he would respond with a quite ironic humour. "The last time I saw him was Wednesday, we walked past each other and said hello, much as you do with someone you are expecting to see in the next couple of days. "I am personally saddened by his passing and full of concern for his family. He will be sorely missed."


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Majuba Road, Redcar TS10 5BJ PAGE 9


The Passing of an Old Friend. Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be best remembered for having cultivated such valuable lessons as: Knowing when to come in out of the rain : Why the early bird gets the worm : Life isn't always fair and maybe it was my fault. Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition. Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion. Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home without the burglar being able to sue you for assault. Common Sense finally gave up the will PAGE 10

to live after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement. Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, by his wife, Discretion, by his daughter, Responsibility, and by his son, Reason. He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, I Want It Now, Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. And now a relative newcomer has emerged - a very scary relative. The Health & Safety cousin best known for both slowing down and increasing the cost of everything to accommodate the stupid.



Redcar & Cleveland


Easter Playscheme Programme 2010 For Children Aged 5 – 12 Years Old

Each venue will run one 4 hour session per day 10am-2pm. Children will need a packed lunch.







Tuesday 6th April

Grangetown Primary School St George’s Road, Grangetown. TS6 7JA

Saltburn Learning Campus Marske Mill Lane, Marske Road, Saltburn. TS12 1QA

Wednesday 7th April

Grangetown Primary School St George’s Road, Grangetown. TS6 7JA

Saltburn Learning Campus Marske Mill Lane, Marske Road, Saltburn. TS12 1QA

Thursday 8th April

California Youth Centre Guisborough Street, Eston.

St Peter's C of E VC Primary School Marshall Drive, Brotton, TS12 2UW

Friday 9th April

California Youth Centre Guisborough Street, Eston.

St Peter's C of E VC Primary School Marshall Drive, Brotton, TS12 2UW

Monday 12th April

Dormanstown Primary School South Avenue, Dormanstown TS10 5LY

New Marske Primary School Birkdale Road, New Marske TS11 8BN

Tuesday 13th April

Dormanstown Primary School South Avenue, Dormanstown TS10 5LY

New Marske Primary School Birkdale Road, New Marske TS11 8BN

Wednesday 14th April

Dormanstown Primary School South Avenue, Dormanstown TS10 5LY

Lockwood Primary School Boosbeck TS12 3BL

Thursday 15th April

Caedmon Primary School Atlee Road, Grangetown TS6 7NA

Lockwood Primary School Boosbeck TS12 3BL

Friday 16th April

Caedmon Primary School Atlee Road, Grangetown TS6 7NA

Lockwood Primary School Boosbeck TS12 3BL Each session costs £1.50 All places must be booked prior to the start of the playscheme. No admission will be given on the day unless a place has been pre-booked. Payment will be taken at the playscheme on the day.

Bookings will open on 23rd March and places will be allocated on a first come first served basis. Places are limited and get booked up quickly, it is advisable to ring as the booking opens, once venues are full booking will end. You can book your child’s place by calling the Families Information Service on FREEPHONE number 0800 073 8800.



The hazards of car parking We recently became acquainted with a delightful little book called ‘The Grumpy Drivers ’ Handbook’ by someone with the appropriate pseudonym ‘Ivor Grump.’ One of the chapters deals with parking the car and since it covers most of everyone’s pet hates we thought we would share some of them with you. Parking Charges It’s easy to see why internet sales are growing when the cost of 3 hour parking in the city centre could feed a family of four for a week. For while prices elsewhere have nose-dived car parks don’t have sales and you still have to pay the full amount at all times. If you want to shop for an hour and ten minutes you have to pay for two hours because unscrupulous operators have arranged time increments so you always have to pay for more than you need. Fussy Parkers There are a small number of motorists who believe that parking the car is a dressage event. Their main objective is to get the car perfectly positioned between the two white parking lines with equal space each side and perfectly parallel. They believe in the power of feng shui and all the chi energy that flows from flawless alignment. They will therefore manoeuvre backwards and forwards, backwards and forwards until that is accomplished – even if it’s just for two minutes while they nip for a newspaper. Approximate Parkers They are even worse as they don’t care where they park the car as long as it’s stopped and the handbrake is on. Reversing into a space between two vehicles is a pain so as long as it’s three quarters of the way in that’ll do. They’ll be gone in an hour so what does it matter? They are also afraid of the kerb and anything to their left so you could probably have a decent game of football in the gap they leave between car and pavement. PAGE 12

Drive Encroachers An Englishman’s home is his castle and I’m not a curtain twitcher who looks outside every time someone parks near the house but it’s the selfishness of those people who don’t look for a proper sized space that annoys me. When some unthinking bxxxxxd parks close enough to the line of exit from your own drive to make it hazardous they are asking for their bumper of front wing to be hacked off by the driveway vigilantes. ‘I’m just picking something up mate, I’ll only be two minutes.’ Yeah, right! Sundry Parkers There are those who park so close to you that you can’t stand between your boot and their bonnet without losing the blood supply to your legs. There are also the ones who block small roads because a car parked innocently in a narrow lane attracts other cars like a wasp to a jam pot. It’s sadly always the innocent one who gets his wing mirror ripped off. The biggest culprits however are the space stealers. You go past a space with the intention of reversing into it – the proper method! And while people can see that you’ve stopped and are indicating there will still be some clever dick who nicks in behind. If someone does this to you I recommend you use their front bumper as a kind of step, really testing it out to make sure it’s solid. Go on, really test it! Multi Story Car Parks Your heart never lifts when you’re entering a multi story, does it? They are apparently popular spots for suicides and can you wonder for being in one doesn’t make you want to cling on to this world for much longer. Unless you’re a big fan of Tate Modern, in which case you might be enthralled by the formal and monolithic brutalism of the concrete structure. Why a multi story hasn’t won the Turner Prize is beyond me. They also have a danger about them because the second the hero of any film is striding towards his car in a dimly lit multi story you know something dreadful is about to happen!





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New Year New Habits

Start saving money and making New Year resolutions to reduce your food waste, and make the most of the food you buy. Here are our top tips ... • Why not start writing a shopping list - Did you know that half of us make a shopping list all or some of the time, but half don’t stick to it in the store. Try making 2010 the year of the shopping list and sticking to it! • Try planning weekly menus - Take the effort out of thinking what you are going to cook each night, and wondering if you have the ingredients to make it, by planning weekly menus. By buying ingredients for the delicious meals we’ve planned at the supermarket, we will be less likely to buy foods we won’t get round to using up. • There really is such a thing as a free lunch - Simply by using what’s already in the fridge, or last night’s leftovers for a packed lunch at work, we can save between £3.00 and £5.00 a day. • Get friendly with your freezer - There’s not much that can’t be frozen for later. Freeze your leftover festive foods such as meats and cheeses to eat in the New Year. • Double up on family favourites - When you’re cooking dishes such as Bolognese, chilli, soups and casseroles, cook one for now and freeze one for later. That way you will have a ready made meal when you get in on these cold nights. • Store cupboard essentials - Keeping essentials such as oils, sauces, beans, pasta and rice in the store cupboard means that there’ll always be something to create a quick meal with odds and ends in the fridge which might have been forgotten otherwise. • Perfect Portions - One of the reasons we throw away food is because we cook too much! Its easy to cook too much of foods such as pasta, rice and potatoes, so use the Love Food hate Waste portion calculator to help you buy and cook just the right amount of food for yourself, your family and your friends. Log onto for more information.

What Should I do with Unwanted Electrical Goods? Waste electronic and electrical equipment (commonly referred to as “WEEE”) such as phones, televisions, fridges, household gadgets and tools and computers is one of the fastest growing types of waste in the UK; we threw away over one million tonnes of it last year alone. Much of this waste ends up in landfill, where lead and other toxins can cause soil and water contamination: but is possible to repair and recycle many electrical items, or to extract components, such as precious metals, plastic and steel. So how do we dispose of electronic waste? If you are buying a new appliance, ask the store what you should do with it. Some retailers will take back old electrical items in store, while others will direct you to your local recycling centre. At Dunsdale and Warrenby we have containers specifically for electronic goods. We also provide a bulky waste collection service. If you are getting rid of something in good working order, consider donating it to a friend, family or local school, hospital, residential home or suchlike.

Battery Recycling

Currently over 1 billion batteries are thrown away in Britain every year. By recycling batteries we can reduce landfill and recover hazardous waste. We will also help meet the target of recycling over 25% of the batteries used by 2012. We have battery buckets for household batteries to be deposited in our Council Office Reception areas. Batteries can also be taken to Asda, Tesco or Morrisons stores.

If you have any questions about our waste and recycling services, please contact the council on 01642 774 774 or visit PAGE 14


“Only a vote for 

Labour can keep the  Tories from getting  into power. 

The choice is clear.” 

Vera Baird QC  Your Labour Candidate for  Redcar 


Vera Baird QC  W o r k i ng

r a c d e R H a r d fo r

Vote Labour Promoted by Sherie Murphy on behalf of Vera Baird QC both at 161 Oak Road, Redcar, TS10 3RE 



WOOD SCREW BARGAINS 4 x 1/2” = £0.89 4 x 5/8” = £0.92 4 x 3/4” = £1.13 4 x 1” = £ 1.23 6 x 1/2” = £0.82 6 x 5/8” = £1.06 6 x 3/4” = £1.08 6 x 1” = £1.14 6 x 1 1/4” = £1.18 6 x 1 1/2” = £1.23 6 x 1 3/4” = £2.05 6 x 2” = £1.98 7 x 3/4” = £1.40 7 x 1” = £1.45 7 x 1 1/4” = £1.69

7 x 1 1/2” = £2.20 8 x 1/2” = £0.92 8 x 5/8” = £1.02 8 x 3/4” = £1.08 8 x 1” = £1.08 8 x 1 1/4” = £1.12 8 x 1 1/2” = £1.48 8 x 1 3/4” = £1.85 8 x 2” = £2.05 8 x 2 1/4” = £2.12 8 x 2 1/2” = £2.70 8 x 3” = £2.20 10 x 3/4” = £1.58 10 x 1” = £1.50 10 x 1 1/4” = £1.90


10 x 1 1/2” = £2.00 10 x 1 3/4” = £2.30 10 x 2” = £2.70 10 x 2 1/4” = £3.58 10 x 2 1/2” = £1.75 10 x 3” = £2.40 10 x 3 1/2” = £4.19 10 x 4” = £4.10 12 x 1 1/2” = £3.40 12 x 2” = £4.45 12 x 2 1/2” = £2.70 12 x 3” = £3.20 12 x 3 1/2” = £4.10 12 x 4” = £4.20




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UK Independence Party .....the real opposition Stuart Lightwing is UKIP’s Parliamentary candidate for Middlesbrough South and East Cleveland at the next General Election. You can read more about Stuart and the policies he supports and the arguments for doing so by visiting You can also email him at UKIP is now a major political party whose candidates obtained 17% of the votes at the European Parliamentary elections in June 2009 beating Labour into third place and the Lib/Dems into fourth. UKIP’s membership never stops growing. It has now 13 MEPs and over 500 candidates adopted to stand for the Party at the next General Election. UKIP believe that it is in the UK’s interest to withdraw from the EU. It has now also formulated many important policy statements. This is Stuart’s personal message. I have practiced as a barrister in the North East for over 30 years. I was Head of the set of Barristers Chambers in Middlesbrough for several years. I know the constituency area very well. I was born in Brotton, East Cleveland and have lived in the constituency area for most of my life. I am a local candidate interested in the local area and its people. I believe that there is a need to regain our national identity and to bring common sense back into politics. I will support the following policies; • Withdrawal from the EU • Stop immigration and repeal the Human Rights Act • Immediate withdrawal of our troops from Iraq and Afghanistan • Reform of the NHS • Simplify the tax system and reduce the tax burden • Reform education and training • Ensure that crime fits the punishment • Promote a policy for UK power involving nuclear and clean coal • Reform Welfare Benefits • Abolition of 75% of Government Quangos • Reduction in the number of MP’s • A coherent and integrated transport policy • Complete overhaul of MP’s expenses • Continuing development of the Durham Tees Valley Airport If ever there was a General Election where every eligible person in this country should vote, this forthcoming election is it. Only through the ballot box will the country get the change it deserves. So much is wrong. To my mind changes is imperative. The UK needs a new direction. I urge you to vote and to vote for me. I guarantee I will serve you well with independence and common sense.





Great definitions

The dictionary is a wonderful way to discover the meaning of obscure words that journalists sometimes drag out to appear more educated than the rest of us, but the definitions it comes up with tend to be a little on the boring side. Here are some that we’ve heard over the years that are not only much more entertaining, but on occasions much more accurate as well! 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. 13. 14. 15. 16. 17. 18. 19. 20.

CANNIBAL: Someone who is fed up with people. CHICKENS: The only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead. COMMITTEE: A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours. CAMEL: A horse that was designed by a committee. DUST: Mud with the juice squeezed out. EGOTIST: Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation. GOSSIP: A system designed to make the simple truth a lot more interesting. KLEENEX: Cold Storage. INFLATION: Cutting money in half without damaging the paper. MOSQUITO: An insect that makes flies seem almost acceptable. RAISIN: A Grape with sunburn. SECRET: Something you tell to everyone, but only one person at a time. SKELETON: A bunch of bones with the person scraped off. TOOTHACHE: The pain that drives you to extraction. TOMORROW: Today’s greatest labour saving device. YAWN: An honest opinion openly expressed. WRINKLES: Something only other people have. Yours are character lines. ARBITRATOR: A cook that leaves Arby’s to work at McDonalds SWISS ARMY KNIFE: An item that appears useful for a wide variety of work, but spends most of its time just opening bottles. TOP BUNK: A place where you should never put a child wearing Superman pajamas.

And finally, a few words that don’t actually exist – but should because we’ve all done it! 21. 22. 23. 24. PAGE 20

AQUADEXTROUS (ak wa deks’trus) adj. Possessing the ability to turn the bath taps on and off with your toes. CARPERPETUATION (kar’pur pet u a shun) n. The act, when vacuuming, of running over a string or a piece of lint at least a dozen times, reaching over and picking it up, examining it, then putting it back down to give the vacuum one more chance. DISCONFECT (dis kon fekt’) v. To sterilize the piece of confection (lollipop) you dropped on the floor by blowing on it, assuming this will somehow ‘remove’ all the germs. TELECRASTINATION (tel e kras tin ay’ shun) n. The act of always letting the phone ring at least twice before you pick it up, even when you’re only six inches away from it.



GREEN BOX Glass bottles & jars, cans/tins. empty aerosol cans. NO Full or part used aerosol cans, broken glass, plastic NEWS FLASH containers, no other metals BLUE BAG All types of paper including; newspapers, magazines, books, catalogs, phone books (any) & junk mail. NO Shredded paper, wall paper, envelopes, or wrapping paper. WHITE HESSIAN SACK OR CLEAR BAG Plastic milk bottles, Lemonade/Cola, Bleach bottles, Shampoo/conditioner bottles, Fabric conditioner, Suntan lotion bottles, Juice cartons (TETRA PAK) PLUS all types of cardboard NO take away fast food boxes. GREEN GARDEN WASTE BIN Grass cuttings, Leaves, Bark, Hedge trimmings, Wood shavings, Vegetarian animal waste ONLY, NO Tea bags, Coffee pods, Fruit & Veg Peelings, Any type of cardboard. FAILURE TO COMPLY WILL RESULT IN NON COLLECTION

Please Ring For Details

01642 774774

YOU CAN NOW PLACE YOUR JUICE CARTONS (TETRA PAK) INTO YOUR HESSIAN SACK OR CLEAR BAG ALONG WITH YOUR CLEAN CARDBOARD & PLASTIC BOTTLES. AEROSOLS Fully extinguished aerosol canisters: Deodorants, Shaving foam, Hair spray etc can go into the Green Box VEGETARIAN ANIMAL WASTE Rabbit, Guinea pig, Hamster waste & bedding can now go into the garden waste bin. Rat, Ferret, Cat or Dog waste must NOT be put in the garden waste bin. TIMETABLE FOR HOUSEHOLD WASTE RECYCLING CENTRES WARRENBY 1st October - 31st March Mon-Fri 1pm-5pm Sat-Sun 8am-5pm DUNSDALE 1st October - 31st March Mon-Fri 8am-12:30pm Sat-Sun 8am-5pm

PLEASE NOTE New Permit Scheme Now In Operation At Both Centres

(a charge may apply from April 2009)



Now you can contribute to ‘The Eye’ by logging on to our fully interactive website. Since its launch in July we feel ‘The Eye’ has quickly become an established medium in the East Cleveland area and have therefore continued to develop its attraction to both readers and advertisers alike. The most important aspect of that development has been the website. Because the Internet is without doubt the biggest, most convenient form of contact ever created we have made our own website completely pro-active, enabling readers to post their own slant on a local news story, include their most interesting photographs and advertise local jobs free of charge while also being able to catch up on all the previous issues of the ‘Eye’ magazine. All this information will be available 24/7 online and the best stories and pictures may also make it into the publication. To add information to our site please login or create an account for FREE (simple to do) then click the ‘create content’ option on the right and follow the links. As a registered user of the website you can add anything you feel will be of interest. Your contribution will then be made available to website visitors once approved by our editing staff. Registered users can also add photographs into the existing galleries, though again all entries will be vetted first. And if you have a suggestion for a new gallery title, please let us know and we will try to implement it.

Read the latest and past issues online FREE If you have an available job position it can also be posted – free of charge of course – although you do need to be a business and have your account with us upgraded to that category. Please contact us to have this done. It is an exciting time for everybody at the ‘Eye’ and we look forward to receiving your contributions. To log onto the website and create an account please visit:

Redcar Rotary Classical Music Concert A classical music concert organised by Rotary Club of Redcar is to be held to raise money

towards Rotary’s International Charities. The Concert will be held in Coatham Memorial Hall, Redcar on Saturday 10th April at 7.00p.m. Tickets, which include a glass of wine and nibbles are £6.00 and obtainable by phoning 01642 485661 PAGE 22


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First ladies only club in East Cleveland Oxygym the health and fitness club chain are launching the first ladies only club in East Cleveland. Based at Redcar Community College Oxygym Ladies Fitness Club opens its door to all women on 1st April. Oxygym Ladies Fitness Club is dedicated to improving the health and fitness of all women in the area. The gym boasts some of the best equipment available together with an exciting range of over 17 fitness and aerobic classes tailored for all abilities. All memberships include full access to the gym and all classes. The owners Glyn Amos and Dave Robinson are committed to delivering a first class service as Glyn said "Our mission is to help all ladies fit exercise and nutrition into their lifestyle in an easy and relaxed way". The gym offers all members a personalised exercise plan that is guaranteed to improve fitness levels, help lose weight and get you into the best shape. As Glyn said "Getting fit and in great shape should not have to dominate your life. We identify what's best for you and put this into an exercise plan that works. When you start to see the results and others comment on how good you look thats when you are more likely to stick to your exercise and when your membership becomes great value for money. We guarantee through our exercise plans and nutritional advice that fitness, weight loss and improved health are achievable for all ladies irrespective of age, fitness level or size" See the back page fore more details.

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Come And Join The Fun! Gymnastics is a great way to develop ďŹ tness, balance and co-ordination in young people while having fun and meeting new friends. Redcar Gymnastics Club teaches general gymnastics, through the BGA badge system, and artistic gymnastics for boys and girls to competition level.

Redcar Gymnastics Club

3 Kirkleatham Street, Redcar (near the train station) 01642 473358 or 07969 705998


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AT PRICES YOU WON’T SHAKE A STICK AT! Opening Hours Tue 10.30am - 3.30pm Thurs 10.30am - 3.30pm Sat 10.30am - 4.30pm

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Looking for activities to keep the kids occupied? Fancy a day out, but not sure where to go? Look no further...

Log on now: PAGE 25


The Aristocracy uncovered It’s not unsurprising in these politically correct days to see the supposed upper class frequently bearing the brunt of comedians’ humour. Perhaps they should accept most of the blame themselves for their apparent failure to come to terms with the equality now demanded by the majority. Here are some examples that they might hopefully find quite funny. Lady Fonsonby confronted the major and told him it was time he told their son Cecil about the birds and the bees. That evening he summoned his son and said ‘Look here, Cecil, do you remember the time I caught you in bed with the maid?’ ‘Yes, father,’ was the reply. ‘Well,’ said the major, ‘your mother wants you to know that birds and bees do it too.’ The lady of the manor was totally dissatisfied with the maid and decided to fire her, citing her poor performance as both a cook and a housekeeper. The young girl – in a parting shot – rounded on the lady and said ‘your husband thinks I’m a better cook and housekeeper than you are. And what’s more I’m a damn sight better in bed than you as well. ‘Did my husband tell you that too?’ asked her Ladyship. ‘No,’ said the girl. ‘It was the butler.’ The old colonel was sitting in his club when an old army colleague approached him. ‘Sorry to hear, old boy, that you buried your wife yesterday.’ ‘Had to,’ replied the colonel. ‘Dead you know.’ Overheard in the gentlemen’s club; ‘I say, Smithers, who is Ponsonby talking to?’ ‘He’s talking to himself,’ was the reply. ‘Then why is he shouting?’ ‘He’s deaf.’ PAGE 26

The old duke was confiding in his friend. ‘Do you know, Charles, last night my wife and I finally achieved compatibility in the bedroom for the first time. ‘How?’ asked his interested friend. ‘We both had a headache.’ Lord and Lady Fanshaw had embarked on a round the world cruise and on the third day the purser approached them and asked if they would like to dine at the Captain’s table that evening. ‘Certainly not, old boy’ said Fonsonby. ‘We haven’t paid all this money to dine with the bloody crew!’ Two gentlemen farmers were discussing their herds. The first said ‘Why is it, old boy, that your herd breeds so well and mine doesn’t?’ ‘Because my vet let me have some pills for my bulls that increased their sexual drive,’ said the second. ’Have you any idea what’s in them?’ asked the first. ‘No,’ said the second, ‘but they taste of peppermint.’

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Is this the modern equivalent of the freak show? In the early part of the twentieth century one of the strangest forms of entertainment were the freak shows that invariably accompanied travelling fairs. Incorporating a variety of weird exhibits ranging from five legged sheep to dwarfs and hunchbacks, the shows obviously appealed to the more voyeuristic nature and took advantage of the sad creatures born with a range of horrible deformities. Modern surgical techniques and political correctness have – to a great extent – wiped out these dreadful exhibitions, but having been subjected to morning television on a number of occasions recently I reckon there is a modern equivalent. Ringmasters like Jeremy Kyle and Gerry Springer now parade their own versions of freak shows in front of huge television audiences on a daily basis, but the strangest aspect of this twenty first century phenomenon is that the freaks themselves have obviously volunteered to appear, intent on achieving their ‘fifteen minutes of fame.’ My immediate reaction is always ‘where the hell do they find these people?’ Society in general – or at least the part of it that we inhabit – is full of nice people whose attitude to life has remained unaltered for generations. Do the best you can with the talent you have; find a compatible partner with whom you can share your life; rear your children to have respect and appreciation and within your budget enjoy life to the full. That, I would suggest, is the perfect recipe for a happy existence. It therefore makes you wonder who has brought up and taught the morons who appear on these shows daily with an PAGE 28

apparent belief that the world owes them a living without them having to actually work for it and that partners are something to use and discard at will. The growing number of people who appear and subject themselves to lie detectors, DNA tests and an amazing amount of abuse from the partners they’ve scorned suggests that the dysfunctional population is growing and that growth is in direct proportion to the increase of readily available recreational drugs, the ease with which unmarried teenage mothers seem to secure council accommodation and the benefits that go with it , and – most importantly - the lowering of disciplinary standards in both schools and society. Sadly, there appears to be little that any government is willing to do to address the problem. Even if they were there are numerous human rights groups who try to prevent any measures that restrict a person’s ability to do what the hell he likes regardless of who it offends. Kyle and Springer frequently feature wonderful examples of the type of person who would quickly change the do-gooders attitude if they were moved in next door to them. If only....


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Garden Waste We ONLY want grass cuttings, tree & shrub prunings, leaves, dried & dead flowers, hedge clippings & vegetarian animal waste ie rabbit / hamster

At least 3 times more milk and juice cartons will fit into the clear bag if you squash them first. Please remember to include your cartons into your plastic bottle & clean cardboard clear sacks.

On average the residents of Redcar & Cleveland will use an estimated 7.7 million milk and juice cartons each year!

Win an amazing prize! How do you squash your tetra pak cartons? A youtube search competition to search for the most imaginative way to squash milk and juice cartons before recycling.

Junk Jobs Bulky Waste Collections We provide a free collection service for single items ie fridges, 3 piece suites. ( 3 Free collections per household, per year. )

For more information telephone 01642 774774 People | Progress | Pride PAGE 29


It’s the Championship again next year! I think we can now safely say we’ll be watching Championship football again next season. So, although it might be a little premature let’s sum up the season and the reasons why we are no longer challenging for anything. The simple truth is that regardless of the fact we haven’t scored an enormous number of goals (50 at this point) we would be in a great position if we could have actually hung on once we had a lead. To put it in perspective, in that sensational season in 73/74 when Jackie Charlton’s team won the second division by a record fifteen points we never lost a game after going ahead. That season ‘Boro kept no fewer than 25 clean sheets with results showing 27 wins, eleven draws and only 4 defeats. (That two of those defeats came after we had actually won the league by Easter suggests a bit of complacency may have set in by then.) This season we have actually been in front in nine matches without winning any of them. The end result is that three were lost and the other six drawn so the points given away after being in front total 21. As the league table stands at the time of writing those points would put us in third place just a win behind Newcastle. What is even worse is that on three occasions we conceded in ninety minutes plus and on another three in the last fourteen minutes. So does that mean we aren’t as bad as people are suggesting or is it just me looking for some crumb of comfort from what has been a disappointing season to PAGE 30

say the least? I actually think it’s a bit of both. Provided Strachan can somehow add a little creativity during the Summer I think we have the makings of quite a strong side. Barry Robson has been excellent since his arrival and Scott McDonald is getting fitter and better as games go on. The real strength, though, could come from the Wheater / McManus partnership provided they can stay fit for long enough to get to know each other’s game better. In the meantime we’ll just have to hope for a decent but irrelevant finish to the season and a great world cup.



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Issue 10 of The Eye  

Issue 10 of The Eye