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"Better your own land's weeds, than other men's wheat." - Uzbek saying

The Woody Creek

EARWIG Volume 2, Issue 5

the voice of Woody Creek

May/June 2014

Dominion comes in many forms

Woody Creek remembers Lani Shaw— community member, amazing mother, mentor, leader for social justice, and friend. Lani passed away Monday, June 2, in her home in Woody Creek.

Woody Creek and its yesterdays By Tony Vagneur It’s off to a slow start, but just like the greening of the trees, there’s a feeling in the air around the Woody Creek Tavern – it’s Spandex season again! Those laid back winter lunch days of sitting where you want in the Tavern are over, but dining at the Woody Creek Community Center (WC3) next door, while apparently less chic for the Lycra crowd, is always nonchalant and friendly. It won’t be long before canopies are swaying in the breeze above the outside Tavern tables and just getting to the entrance to inquire about a table will become a basic lesson in obstacle courses. It’s totally unintentional on the biker’s part, I’m sure, but taking over the county road, bikes in hand, to figure out which direction Aspen is, or to wait for the next taxi cab, is not attractive. We love the business and the attention – we’ve come a long way from the days when we had to tell people we were “near” Denver to give them a fix on our possible location. Aspen and Woody Creek were unfamiliar names to 99% of the population and sometimes the other 1% wasn’t quite sure about it, either. Back when the Tavern was a small grocery store/ post office that sold two grades of gasoline.

To the bikers - it’s totally understandable that you’ve chosen to “experience” our Woody domain, even if just for lunch or a short bike ride. If you believe that you’ve luckily entered some sort of wonderland, or if you purposefully came to score a look at some imaginary celebrity you think hangs out here, that’s fine, but please remember that real people live and work here. The county did not embed us in the décor for your viewing pleasure. This is still a ranching community and you may occasionally ride upon cattle being driven along the road. This is not to impede your travel unnecessarily, but rather to get the beasts from one location to another. We understand your dismay at getting cow shit on your bike tires, but try to understand our difficulty of rounding up a hundred of the scattered bovine beauties after you’ve taken a turn at playing “Rawhide”! Don’t forget – pedestrians and livestock have the right-ofway. And a last friendly reminder – the white picket fence in front of the WC3 is a yard fence, not a bike rack. We wish you a long and pleasant summer season. Please come see us, but respect us, as well. Tony Vagneur grew up in Woody Creek, or at least he gave it his best shot, and still hangs out there, somewhat like an old raven with tousled feathers and a loud opinion.

By George Stranahan, origanlly printed in The Aspen Times As an amateur sociologist, I was pondering on our human propensity to exert dominion over other living things simply because it is possible to do so. If we have the power to dominate, we tend to use it whether or not it is a “good” thing to do. Our evolutionary success depends on us, each of us, being survivors; i.e. avoiding mortal dangers of all kinds. That’s a big job, for mortal dangers are both common and come in a huge number of varieties. Better safe than sorry. So why do we dominate simply because we can? It’s a matter of efficiency — control all potential mortal dangers before they have a chance to arise. Dominate immediately and then those living things will no longer be part of our whack-a-mole world of survival. Is there a practical example of this sociological theory? Let’s look at childhood, and particularly the schools we designed to deal with these living things. They don’t have the right of assembly; they assemble only when they go to a scheduled assembly. They don’t have the right of free speech; the school paper is censored. Fourth Amendment, probable cause and warrants for searches? Lockers and backpacks are opened with mere suspicion. I was aware that corporal punishment, historically and descriptively called caning, used to be pretty commonly practiced in schools. Friends who had gone to church schools talked of knuckles rapped by rulers and ears twisted. I did a little bit of research — thank you Google and Wikipedia. Corporal punishment in schools is still allowed in 20 states, including Colorado. In a 2008 reporting, the following states hit more than 1 percent of their students: Alabama, Arkansas, Georgia, Louisiana, Mississippi (the winner with 7.5 percent), Oklahoma, Tennessee and Texas. Seems like a pattern here. The Eighth Amendment banning “cruel and unusual punishment” is much in the news with this death penalty by botched lethal injection stuff. I decided to check on whether the Eighth Amendment would apply to corporal punishment in schools, and I got this surprising true story. In Florida, in 1970, an eighth-grade student, last name Ingraham, refused to leave the stage of the school when asked to do so by a teacher. Taken to the principal’s office, he stated that he was not guilty of the accusation. The principal ordered Ingraham to bend over so that he could spank him with a spanking paddle. When Ingraham declined to bend over, he was forcibly placed face-down on the top of a table. The assistant principal held Ingraham’s arms and another assistant held his legs. While restrained, Ingraham was hit more than 20 times with the paddle. He suffered a hematoma requiring medical attention and the attending physician instructed Ingraham to rest at home for a total of 11 days. Ingraham and his parents sued the school, calling it “cruel and unusual punishment.” In 1977 the Supreme Court ruled 5-4, in Ingraham v. Wright, that

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cont. on page 2

Sensible Medicine: Putting yourself to bed By Peg O’Brien, P.T. Perhaps your sleep is bothered by the screamy howls and ow-wow-wow-wow barks of a fox family, or maybe by the beams from your neighbor’s porch light. The fox family, we forgive as we find earplugs. The neighbor hopefully listens when we ask them for help to reduce the light coming in through our window, and responds accordingly; if not, we look for lightblocking window coverings, and forgive the neighbor too. All of these are good strategies for improving sleep, the all-important elixir of health. When a person finally heads to bed, in an environment that is quiet enough and dark enough, it is time to leave everything to the pillows. The best sleep comes to the body settled into a neutral, supported position, which encourages the autonomic nervous system to switch off the hyper vigilant side and shift fully into the calm, nurturing side (known as the sympathetic nervous system and parasympathetic nervous system respectively). This golden position, for most people, is to side lying, with a pillow between the legs, beneath the top arm, and under the head and neck – more bulk beneath the neck. The pillow under the top arm not only serves to eliminate strain on the soft tissue structures running from the neck to the hand, but cozies up to the belly, protecting the viscera. Evolutionarily, all animals sleep best with their belly protected, this is why sleeping on the back rarely allows one to fall into a deep sleep. The pillow between the legs reduces strain on structures running from the low back through the pelvis and down to the feet, most notably the sciatic nerve. Sleep is the best medicine for most ailments, and it’s free. Put yourself to bed early, in a good sleep environment with the right pillow placement, and enjoy high-quality doses of sleep, so that in the dark of night. With long stretches of restful nights under your belt, if you decide to get up and listen to the calls of the foxes, you may enjoy them then slip back into bed, and rest assured that you have plenty of sleep-time to spare. Being fully rested also makes one a better neighbor, more likely to design porch lighting to spare a neighbor’s windows. Maybe the foxes will be tempted into the darkness allowed near their house? Well, I wouldn’t loose sleep over that. Other sleep tips: -A walk in the sunshine during the height of the day. -Keep to a routine, every night of the week. -Avoid looking at a computer or tackling difficult projects or conversations for the hours approaching bedtime. -Eat something with protein and fat before bed. -Sleep tea: hot water with a dash of milk, dollop of molasses, and shake of cinnamon is nice; or sleepy time pre-packaged tea. -Cool room temperature and warm blankets. A hot pack or hot water bottle to warm the feet. Peg O’Brien, P.T., Woody Creek

Dominion (cont. from page 1) the Eighth Amendment did not apply to corporal punishment in schools nor does the 14th Amendment for due process apply. The winning argument was that the Eighth Amendment obviously was written for convicted criminals only, and hence did not apply to schoolchildren. Dominion is more than just compulsory attendance and standardized tests. George Stranahan remembers his own schooling, his own children’s experiences in school and he tried to make it better with the two community schools in the Roaring Fork Valley.

Woody Creek Caucus Meeting Minutes April 24, 2014 PRESENT: Janet Schoeberlein Steve Prudden Phil Holstein Jim Collins Jennifer Craig Cathy Jandegian Bill Dinsmoor Ty Burtard Cheryl Savich Monty Thompson Emily Taylor Gus Filiss

Jane Dinsmoor Pam Moore Gail Holstein Michael Owsley Linda Waag Jeff Jandegian Patrick Scanlan Marty Schlumberger Kim Coates J. Dart Anita Thompson Daniel Delano

Phil Holstein called the meeting to order at 6:30. The minutes were read from the “Earwig” and approved. Steve Prudden suggested we have a standard agenda format: Approval of the minutes DPC report Neighborhood reports By-laws: Jim Collins said the basic formation of the Woody Creek Caucus makes it difficult to fill all the positions, formerly the Executive Committee of 4 (2 moderators, secretary and treasurer) and the District Planning Commission of 7 members. The recommendation is that the organizing body would be the DPC made up of a secretary/treasurer (1), a moderator and a pro-tem to fill in when necessary, 3 elected members and 2 alternates. The election will be in June. A list of nominees was started: Linda Waag Cathy Jandegian Jennifer Craig Phil Holstein Jan Schoeberlein Emily Taylor (alternate) The DPC is “advisory” to the WCC first and foremost. They review land use issues and bring a recommendation to WCC. It is not autonomous. Michael Owsley suggested an outline draft by the by-laws committee of the new structure of DPC. Phil H made the Motion: to bring the concept of a new DPC to replace the Executive Committee forward from the Bylaws Committee for formalization and discussion at the next Caucus meeting. Passed unanimously. Aspen Valley Ranch: The BOCC hearing was last Wednesday. There is a site visit planned for those interested in attending. The Metro District for the WCMHP: The BOCC accepted the idea of the metro district and it will go to election by the mobile home park owners. WC Development Corp: Rachal Baxter stated that the corp owns Dr. Jay Baxter’s piece of land on flats between the water tank and Elam Road. A 52-acre piece of land they will be selling eventually, so it is to be considered in our growth section. Orange trash bag cleanup: Emily said this will go through the month of May and bags are available at WC3 if you want to participate. Master Plan Update: The oversight committee for the master plan will meet at 3:00 on Mondays at WC3. Phil read the list of topics for committees: Agriculture, Airport, Commercial, Growth/ Housing, Open Space & Trails, Wildlife/ Fencing, Public Spaces, Recreation, Roads/ Transportation, Schools, Neighborhoods, Other topics: Weed Control, Riparian Protection, Wifi/Fiber optic/Internet access, Mosquito Abatement. The meeting was adjourned.


Why do cowboys always die with their boots on? So they won't stub their toes when they kick the bucket.

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The one, the only, the PriASS by Alaina Mulawka My parents were proud owners of a brand new Prius. Two minutes later—my mom got sideswiped upon exiting the dealership. By day 26 she just gave up and tossed me the keys to what will become the bane of my existence. Just last week while I was away on vacation and I get this message, “It looks worse than it is.” And a minute later I receive the images of my Prius teeter tottering next to my driveway—half in the ditch, half in the road. “Don’t worry, I have it under control.” And that’s the funny thing. No one has it under control. You see these other cars drive over pebbles in the road and you think the Prius can drive over them too. You are proven wrong. Pure chaos is inflicted upon your vehicle due to an itsy bitsy rock smaller than your fist. When traveling uphill you are the little engine that could? If you happen to lightly tap your breaks while driving on an incline, you are screwed. You have no pick up and all the cars around you try to run you off the road. Lets talk about speeding. They will pull you over only because law enforcement is genuinely concerned for your safety. The irony is that the Prius is most dangerous when in park, or going under 8mph. I was parked at the drive thru pharmacy at Walgreen’s when I watched in horror as this little old lady slowly backed into my passenger side back door. So slowly I actually had time to try and move my car, but found I was blocked in. Was forced to put the car back in park and twiddle my thumbs and wait for the saddest of all car accidents to consumed me. The kicker is, the last two months prior to that accident my car had already been in the shop four times for the same door getting pummeled by little old ladies in parking lots. The guys at the body shop were brought to tears over my pathetic existence. All not my fault, all whilst I was parked and sitting in my car. Then there was that time I was sitting in traffic. Hap-

pened to bump into the car ahead of me slowly sliding on ice, and watch in absolute amazement as this brand new Lexus’ bumper just fell off in front of me. The damage on my car was a slightly dented license plate. This car defies physics. Three times in one week last summer I would park my car somewhere and come out to the same tire being completely flat. Went through three brand new tires in one week. My friends all gathered to help me during this time only because they thought I was joking. Then this winter when my car got stuck in a parking space due to one inch of ice under two tires, three Mexicans came to my rescue. Two pushed and one steered. The driver screamed as he peeled out and almost hit the cars parked across the road. I have no idea what he was saying, but I don’t need to. I regularly deal with this. And back to that guy that put my car into my ditch last week reversing down my driveway, he builds sporty Audi’s and other gear head things. I remember showing him how to turn my car on and off. He didn’t have it under control. Nor has anyone else.

Just another annual reminder by Gaylord Guenin Unfortunately, mountain bikers are not quite as considerate as the seven-year locust. While the locust appear only spasmodically, swarms of mountain bikers invde the Woody Creek area on an annual basis. And unlike the locust, many mountain bikers lack a sense of where they are, where they are going, or why. Like it or not, it’s more or less up to the rest of us to try to protect them. The most serious infestations occur on Upper and Lower River Road (they tend to swarm near the Woody Creek Tavern and Woody Creek Community Center) and the Woody Creek Road all the way to Lenado. As the idea of riding single file (which is what the law requires) seems far too complicated a procedure for them to comprehend, always be prepared to encounter four or five of them riding abreast on a blind curve. Bug deflectors are a satisfactory means of maintaining a clean windshield, unfortunately mountain-bike deflectors are considered to be illegal, so it’s best to use a little caution during mountain-bike season. They may create a nuisance and they may appear to be hopelessly confused about what they are doing and where they are going, but on the whole we would guess they are probably good people. The world is in short supply of good people, so try not to hit any of them. It is okay, however, to express your displeasure at their presence in a verbal manner. This article is reprised from the July 1995 Earwig, Volume 1, Issue 1. Gaylord Guenin is the original creator and editor of ‘The Earwig’, and co-author of Aspen: The Quiet Years. He currently lives in Woody Creek, CO.

Ranch Roundup By Lauren Burtard, Chaparral Ranch It’s fair to say that this time of year on a ranch is not the most enjoyable. There is so much to get done in a short time period; it can be challenging to juggle it all. With that said, because we’ve been so busy, I’ll leave you with a list of things that are happening on the ranch now: •fertilizing the hay fields •changing oil in equipment

•cleaning ditches •artificially inseminating (AI) the cows and turning out on spring pasture •turning sprinkler system on, making sure all of them work •building fence •plowing and prepping the fields for potato planting Yes, this means lots of late nights, but it’s all worth-while. The work load will even out again before haying season starts. In the grand scheme, we’re just happy to live the life we live and are able to be good stewards of the land.

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April 2014 May’s astrology indicates a message of recovery. April’s Grand Cross definitely brought up "what is up" or "what is finishing, finally shifting." In May we see Mars going forward and finally no more retrograde in Libra and also Venus connecting to Uranus and opposing Mars. The Sun in Taurus is another big influencer..... get those home projects going...! What does this all mean to the layman? Mars going retrograde in Libra means reviewing our relationships and seeing and experiencing anger or fighting. Or potentially in this age “trying to control ourselves.” The years 1982, 1967, 1950 are the last times Mars went retrograde in Libra, so think back? Mars in Libra is not a fun place for Mars. Libra is about relationship, harmony, balance and beauty. Mars brings in the heat, the fire. Retrograde means closest to the sun in the Mars cycle. It is also at its brightest in the night sky. So put all that into the mix symbolically. Figure out what that means to you as Mars is the masculine, the warrior. The good news Mars is moving(may 19) and by June will be out into Scorpio. That will start the summer hot..... As for Venus conjuncting Uranus, expect moments of passion, creativity and spontaneity such as, “hey! Let’s go to the Belly Up to hear Stephan Stills," or you hit the road to Moab. The May full moon (it was on May 14) was likely the beginning of these moments. For more personal understanding of your direct effects of these aspects, check in with For more personal understanding of your direct effects of t h e s e a s p e c t s , c h e c k i n : D A V I D B E R K S O N A S T R O L O G Y d a v i d b e r k s o n @ m e . c o m (847) 777-9138

ABOUT THE EARWIG The Earwig is a neighborhood publication sharing the news and creative efforts of the residents and friends of Woody Creek, CO. Please email submissions to by the first Sunday of the month. The Earwig comes once each month. You can find it in boxes at the Woody Creek Community Center, the Woody Creek Tavern, and the Woody Creek Post Office. Editors:

Gaylord Guenin Emily Taylor

Margaret Reckling

April Contributors: David Berkson Lauren Burtard Alaina Mulawka Peg O'Brien George Stranahan Tony Vagneur GET A FREE AD IN THE EARWIG! The Earwig will be selling ad space starting in May. For a business card sized ad, the cost is $10/month. If you have a local business, please consider buying ad space! One local business a month will be given free ad space, tell us why it should be you! If you are interested in buying larger ad space, please email for more information.

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EARWI G P.O. Box 4 Woody Creek, CO 81656 The Woody Creek EARWIG Page 4

The Earwig May 2014  

The Earwig is a monthly neighborhood publication for Woody Creek, CO.