monster VERDICT None of the cookies were very recommendable, but if you found yourself starving to death in a barren wasteland with only a Chinese supermarket for sustenance we recommend your least awful sugar rush will come from the Fate & Date brand Choco Cookies. We do not suggest you buy them for your date though, if that’s what you had in mind, or you might have to take fate into your own hands.
Rich Milk Biscuits (RMB 4.6 for 130g) “Literally the worst thing I have ever eaten in my life. And I had to try all those convenience store burgers!” “I bet the cows that gave their milk for this gross disaster grew up drinking water from Houhai.” “Circle of Death took on a whole new meaning. What sorcery compelled someone to mash soap flakes into a circle and flank it with such a generic biscuit?”
Sultana Biscuits (RMB 12.50 for 200g) “You know when it’s rush hour and you’re in Sanlitun and drunk and you have to go to work the next day and there are no taxis? And then, that one empty taxi slows down, sees you’re foreign, and speeds off? Yeah, that’s what this cookie tastes like.” “I like them, deeply. Simple and elegant.” “I actually want a second one of these. Maybe it’s just because the others are so terrible.”
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Choco Cookies (RMB 9.5 for 100g) “It smells like a wood cabin, complete with the saliva sucking texture of fresh sawdust.” “It’s like the cousin of chocolate who comes to family parties drunk, the relative you hate the ever living hell out of yet still see showing up in pantries.” “If offered this cookie I’d hesitate with a maybe, like the same maybe you whisper to yourself when someone asks if you want to stay for just one more drink after happy hour.”