Please be more responsible with who you give a voice to in your magazine. Marina Clovelly ROCKS IN HEAD, ROCKS ON ANKLES I consider myself a positive person. Friends call me ‘happygo-lucky’ and colleagues often ask why I’m always smiling. But don’t let my bright disposition fool you - yes, fool you - just like the incredibly bright spark who installed the fire alarm in the now demolished Allianz Stadium fooled us all into thinking he knew what he was doing when he installed it. My sweetness aside, I’d happily tie the rocks to the ankles of the person who installed this system. Yes, that’s right, if I am woken up one more time between the hours of 11pm and 5am! It goes off every single week. It is enough that the suburb of Paddington has to deal
12 The Beast August 2019
with the barrage of construction noise from the demolition of Allianz Stadium and the dust of what is probably asbestos filling our homes (it’s highly suspicious that the majority of the stadium was knocked down during Sydney’s wettest week). Yes, I’m sweet and clued in, so watch out OH&S officer, I know of your incompetence! The ‘emergency evacuate now’ alarm is obviously faulty, because if people were setting it off deliberately at 2am then surely the cost of security guards would be far less than the thousands in fees for multiple fire trucks to go to the stadium every single week. If that alarm goes off one more time in the middle of the night, Little Miss Sunshine here won’t be putting sugar in your tea - it’ll be something that’ll feel like a strong hit to the head, just like the sound of that alarm going off at 3am feels to me. Elisa Paddington
DIGITAL DICKHEADS Dear Beast - I was at Black Boho café in Coogee today, trying to enjoy a coffee in a tiny café space with two dickheads on either side of me having full-on work-related conversations with their laptops the whole time I was there, which was at least 20 minutes. Okay guys, I get the whole digital nomad thing, but please consider your surroundings the people around you, plus the businesses you are in. These are not office spaces, so don’t drain them of their wifi all day and turn off other customers from coming in. And, buy more than one coffee if you are going to take up a seat and table all frigging day! The poor café owners are at a loss as to how to teach you some manners. Janine Coogee P.S. Both tables of course had ocean views.
The August 2019 edition of The Beast featuring Brooke Boney...