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English 1101 Final Portfolio Project Title Table of Contents

Analytical Cover Letter....................................................................................................................1 Quality Comparison .........................................................................................................................4 Least Successful Article Response ......................................................................................5 Most Successful Article Response .......................................................................................7 “What’s the Difference?” .....................................................................................................9 Revision Samples ...........................................................................................................................11 Least Successful Article Response (with markup) ............................................................12 Least Successful Article Response (final) .........................................................................14 Most Successful Article Response (with markup) .............................................................16 Most Successful Article Response (final) ..........................................................................18 Most Successful Essay (with markup) ...............................................................................20 Most Successful Essay (final) ............................................................................................25


June 30, 2010 Matthew R. Horton, Ph. D. Assistant Professor of English Gainesville State College Oconee Campus 313b Oconee Classroom 1201 Bishop Farms Parkway Watkinsville, GA 30677 Dear Dr. Horton, First paragraph. Second paragraph. Third paragraph. Fourth paragraph. Fifth paragraph. Sixth paragraph. Sincerely,

Michael G. Smith

1


Least Successful Article Response One More Baby Won't Hurt! Padawer, Ruth. "The Two-Minus-One Pregnancy." The New York Times Magazine. The New York Times Company, 10 August 2011. Web. 09 Sept. 2011. According to Ruth Padawer, the reduction procedure is increasing in soon to be mothers of twins. The purpose of reduction was to improve pregnancies and the health of the mothers. Parents would lose some fetuses for the sake of others in order to bring home healthier babies. Doctors did not feel like it was necessary to reduce twins because twins were commonly born healthy babies. Padawer believes the idea of reduction has evolved into something totally different than what it was meant to be. Now, soon to be mothers of twins reduce to singletons for unnecessary reasons. To prove this point, Padawer included an example of a woman who chose to reduce her pregnancy to a singleton because of the fetus’s sex she chose to eliminate the son instead of the daughter. Her reason was she already had a son, so she wanted to keep the daughter. What Padawer is trying to get across is if your choice of reduction does not involve health issues then you don’t have a good reason to get a reduction. Padawer blames science and technology for inflating our expectations of what family life should be. Padawer believes if reduction didn’t exist, women would not worry about having a reduction. Ruth Padawer’s point that soon to be mothers of twins choose reduction for unnecessary reasons is truly significant to American moral values. Americans do not support women who abort for taking no precaution at all, financial reason, or if she aborts because of the fetus sex. Ruth Padawer point of view is culturally significant because abortion rights are a huge issue in America. Americans can not decide whether a woman should have the right to kill her baby. Because there are so many other options other than aborting most Americans lose respect to


those women who choose abortion. The government makes sure that women have the help they need, so there is no reason to abort. So why do these women need to reduce from two to one? Ruth Padawer challenges the audience to think about why women should have a reduction if they are pregnant with twins. What should be a good reason for soon to be mothers of twins to reduce? Ruth Padawer also makes the audience think about what if reduction did not exist. What would these mothers do?


Most Successful Article Response Free Will is not Free: Human Biology Affects Us in Many Ways Eagleman, David. "The Brain on Trial." Atlantic Magazine. The Atlantic Monthly Group, July/ August, 2011. Web. 09 Nov. 2011 In this article, David Eagleman believes that everyone doesn’t have the option of free will because our “human behavior can’t be separated from human biology”. David Eagleman supports his beliefs by explaining why everyone doesn’t have the choice of free will. A person’s choices and behavior are influenced by their genes and environment in which they grow up. In the article Eagleman provided a statistical study that showed “if you are a carrier of a particular set of genes, the probability that you will commit a violent crime is four times as high as I would be if you lacked those genes. You’re three times three times as likely to commit robbery, five times as likely to commit aggravated assault, eight times as likely to be arrested for murder, and 13 times as likely to be arrested for a sexual offense. The majority of prisoners carry these genes; 98.1% of death-row inmates do.” As a child you can’t control your environment or your genes, so those are things you just have to deal with. We can’t control what happens to our brains. For example, we can’t tell our brain to not have a tumor that affects our decision. The things that we can’t control affect our ability to have free will. Many people think they make their own choices and they have the right to chose whatever they like. Those people are wrong because their choices were made based upon their genes and environments. For example, ask majority of freshman college students at any university what’s their political opinion is and why, and majority of the answers will be either republican or democratic and because their parents support that party. David Eagleman point that everyone doesn’t have the option of free will because our “human behavior can’t be separated


from human biology” is worth thinking about because many people don’t understand the concept that behavior is affected by biology. Free choice is the ability to make a decision on one’s own without any outside influences. What David Eagleman is trying to tell his readers is every decision we make are already made for us, before our birth. According to David Eagleman they were made “when the meeting of a sperm and an egg granted us certain attributes and not others". All adults don’t have the capacity to make the right decisions because our brains are not the same, they’re different.


Least Successful Article Response One More Baby Won't Hurt! Padawer, Ruth. "The Two-Minus-One Pregnancy." The New York Times Magazine. The New York Times Company, 10 August 2011. Web. 09 Sept. 2011. According to Ruth Padawer, the reduction procedure is increasing in soon to be mothers of twins. The purpose of reductionthe reduction procedure was to improve both the pregnancies and the health of the mothers. In order to bring home healthier babies, parents would lose some fetuses for the sake of others. Parents would lose some fetuses for the sake of others in order to bring home healthier babies. Doctors did do not feel like it is was necessary to reduce twins because twins were are commonly born healthy babies. Padawer believes the idea of reduction has evolved into something totally different than what it was meant to be. Now, soon to be mothers of twins reduce to singletons for unnecessary reasons. To prove this point, Padawer included an example of a woman who chose to reduce her pregnancy to a singleton because of the fetus’s sex she chose to eliminate the son instead of the daughter. Her reason was she already had a son, so she wanted to keep the daughter. What Padawer is trying to get across is if your choice of reduction does not involve health issues then you don’t have a good reason to get a reduction. Padawer blames science and technology for inflating our expectations of what family life should be. Padawer believes if reduction didn’t exist, women would not worry about having a reduction. Ruth Padawer’s point that soon to be mothers of twins choose reduction for unnecessary reasons is truly significant to American moral values. Americans do not support women who abort for taking no precaution at all, financial reason, or if she aborts because of the fetus sex. Ruth Padawer point of view is culturally significant because abortion rights are a huge issue in

Comment [GSC1]: Dependent clause should be at the beginning of this sentence with a comma in between the dependent clause and the independent clause.


America. Americans can not decide whether a woman should have the right to kill her baby. Because there are so many other options other than aborting most Americans lose respect to those women who choose abortion. The government makes sure that women have the help they need, so there is no reason to abort. So why do these women need to reduce from two to one? Ruth Padawer challenges the audience to think about why women should have a reduction if they are pregnant with twins. What should be a good reason for soon to be mothers of twins to reduce? Ruth Padawer also makes the audience think about what if reduction did not exist. What would these mothers do?



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