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VOLUME 4 NUMBER 163:32

FEBRUARY 15-FEBRUARY 21, 2011

Buddha walks up to Willie's hot dog stand and says 'make me one with everything.'

Dorr's perception is infinite p. 8 | by Courtney Clenney

ALSO:

The third degree:

Tristan Taormino p. 4

Buddhism: a coming of age story p. 13 | by Stanley Tollett


voice

SYMPOSIUM symposium

They say, "Love thy neighbor.¨

Albany● Corvallis● Lebanon● Philomath VOLUME 4 NUMBER 163:32, FEBRUARY 15-FEBRUARY 21, 2011

voice

Editorial

Editors Courtney Clenney, Stanley Tollett Staff Writers Courtney Clenney, Noah Stroup, Stanley Tollett Bump Editor Noah Stroup Contributors Dirtstir, Tim Hellman, Jimbo Ivy, Joel Rea

Opinions and Editorials, be they ours or yours, this is where they be.

3 | Dirtstir 4 | The 3rd Degree: Tristan Taormino

Art

Art Director Freddy Ruiz Layout Editor Courtney Clenney Cover art by: Jake Dorr Back cover art by: Jake Dorr

verdict We’ll be the judge. You be the jury...you trust us right?

5 | Casino Jack & del Alma Review

Advertising

Account Executive Noah Stroup

Business

word Journalists call them features; we say it’s

Publisher Noah Stroup The Alchemist Weekly is published by: CorvAlcheMedia LLC PO Box 1591 Corvallis, OR 97339

the word.

8 | Dorr’s perception 13 | Buddhism

Alchemist Mission

As a publication, our goal is to facilitate greater understanding and appreciation for the diverse social and cultural groups found in the area. In doing so, we hope to create a greater sense of community between Oregon State University and Corvallis, between Albany and Corvallis, and between Philomath, Lebanon and Corvallis-Albany. The Alchemist recognizes the various interests of these groups and is dedicated to being as fluid as the community it serves.

bump

It’s the calendar of all things Albany, Corvallis, Lebanon, and Philomath.

8 | Calendar 11 | Crossword

The Alchemist is available to you for free. Please limit yourself to one copy. If your picture is in it, you are welcome to take enough copies for your family. Subject to availability, back issues can be purchased by mail for $5. Send your request with specific issue date to PO Box 1591, Corvallis, OR 97339 and include a check or money order payable to The Alchemist.

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FEBRUARY 15-FEBRUARY 21, 2011

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Last week's puzzle solutions

On the cover: Interplanetary Contact A Strange And Foreign - "I was remarking with an art collaborator about how much misunderstanding there is between the public sector and the more spiritual side of our society. I am not a religious person but I do follow in the way of Jesus. Still, open dialogue and understanding are often lacking and the Church is often seen as foreign territory to the general public. I want to open more avenues for seeing restoration between these two factions and that's what this painting is about.¨ -Jake Dorr Mixed media on canvas

Seems a simple enough charge. Show compassion for those around you. Other world religions will extend this to include everyone and consider them your neighbor, but how realistic is this? Has the Internet made it easier for us to find compassion for each other or divided our limited capacity for compassion between more people? Maybe we should start to answer this with a definition of compassion. Compassion can be described as our ability to empathize and sympathize. It is what drives us to reach out to those in need and to be able to relate to the rest of humanity. World religions generally encourage us to develop our capacity for compassion in hopes that it will lead us to finding happiness with self and those around us. A compassionate life is a very noble goal, but what if each of us is only capable of so much of it. What if thinking globally actually decreases the amount of compassion we have available? Let’s say I have 10 people that I see on a regular basis. They are my closest friends, and we share everything. I focus on their happiness, and they focus on mine. As a group, we clearly show compassion for each other and interest in each other’s survival. Imagine we’re all hanging out one day and we run into another group of 10 people, one of whom falls in love with someone from our group. Our group of 10 has now become a group of 20, and we attempt to engage in the same sort of interaction as before, but now we have a little less time for each individual and therefore are less capable of disseminating the same level of compassion for each person. Hyper-space jump this into today where Facebook has made it possible for us to have 500 pseudo-friends, people we’ve met once, former members of your circle or people we hope to meet in the future. Now my social circle extends

to those 500 people in my list, plus their 500 different friends that could potentially become my friends. How can I possibly show compassion to everyone? I couldn’t possibly be expected to reply with the same amount of empathy for someone I barely know, right? It would seem the tenets of the world religions would say I should muster it from somewhere. I could be going about this incorrectly. Could it be that my capacity for compassion isn’t like a pie that is divided amongst those needing to take a slice? Maybe it’s better to view my compassion as a moment in time rather than a skill to be developed. In each moment of compassion, my ability to give it is 100% no matter who it is and when it is. In this case, it boils down to whether I choose to implement it. I’d really have to be a selfish bastard to not do so. I should at least offer it to the point where my compassion has been depleted to 51%. Anything past that would greatly reduce my chance of full recovery. The easiest example of this might be parents who have multiple children. A constant barrage of needs reigning down for all directions will quickly deplete a parent’s capacity to hold it together, so they focus on one child at a time until all needs are met. At which point, they can hopefully find some time to focus on their own needs. I’d say it was compassionate for you to even read this week’s Symposium considering the winding road to an incomplete resolution. Compassion, like love, is a subjective notion. We all have the capacity to give and receive it, but like any gift its value is relative to the giver and receiver. Compassion directed to those closest to you will rarely go unnoticed, so despite the opportunities to spread your love far and wide around the world make considerations for those here first. -Noah Stroup noah@thealchemistweekly.com

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voice

LETTERS to the editor

Food carts & boycotts

A woman came into Sunnyside Up last week wanting to talk to me about food carts in Corvallis. Later that day a man came in also wanting to talk about the food carts. He wanted to know if we would oppose them at the public meeting. He then launched into a transparent and clumsy mafia-esque attempt to threaten us by telling us that there was a boycott planned for those businesses which speak out against food carts. The boycott posting on Craigslist was full of righteous indignation about the trampling of American values and then hypocritically offered a slap in the face to the most important American value of free speech. I don’t know who these people are but they are threatening members of this community for daring to exercise their First Amendment rights. I am not operating a Woolworth's lunch counter in 1960 Greensboro, North Carolina (look it up on Wikipedia, kiddies) and I don't appreciate being treated as if I were. The people who are being threatened with a boycott are your neighbors and supporters of this community. I am not opposed to carts in their entirety, I am sure there is a middle ground to be uncovered through rational adult discourse, but I am equally sure I do not cotton to bullies. Here are some of the facts everyone should consider: • An independent restaurant owner quite often invests their life savings in a business, amounting to a hundred or hundreds of thousands of dollars. They frequently take out loans to support their business. They have put their financial lives on the line in order to provide the service of a place to eat. • An independent restaurant owner creates jobs while food carts frequently do not. If each cart created 1 new job (which many don't because they tend to be owner-operated), it would take 20 carts to make up for the loss of jobs should Sunnyside Up go out of business. • After paying property taxes on equipment, real estate taxes on the leased building, payroll, payroll taxes, utilities, insurance, workman's compensation, licensing fees and cost of ingredients, an independent restaurateur often does not make any money himself until the last 15

Wish List

or 20% of his sales. If his revenue drops by 10%, he has just taken a huge cut in pay. That 10% percent of revenue represents maybe 30% of his personal income because his fixed costs remain pretty much the same. A cart owner’s biggest fixed cost is his parking lot rental fee of fifty or a hundred dollars a month, and if his lower fixed costs enable him to significantly undercut everyone else’s prices, then independent restaurant owners don’t stand a chance. While we all feel that carts are cool and we may aspire to be a little bit more like Portland, the truth is Corvallis is a very small town and cannot support a glut of food carts. Brandon Dale is arguing, albeit a little ham-handedly, that carts do not carry the same investment, overhead or licensing costs that a brick and mortar business must carry; but the opposition to food carts is not opposition to competition, it is opposition to unfair competition. After all, as the owners of Sunnyside Up, we did not complain when Mr. Dale opened his breakfast restaurant across the street from our breakfast restaurant, because he was undertaking the same risks that we that had. Since the recession we have seen the demise of Michael’s Landing, Inside Out Garden Visions, Sahalie, Fox and Firkin, Platinum, The Gables, West Moon Trading, Senor Sams, GK1, Urban Minx, The Vibe, Iovino's, Red Horse Coffee and several others I'm sure I'm forgetting. I can assure you an unfettered cart community will cause other local businesses to fail with a ripple effect of rising unemployment, declining tax revenues and falling property values. The result will be a dying city center and steady loss of city services. While the intentions of cart proponents are good—unrestricted carts could have a devastating effect not dissimilar to building a Wal-Mart on the outskirts of town. Finally, to threaten local businesses in such a manner is counterproductive to rational discourse. Perhaps there is a compromise to be had, but that is not likely to happen when your opening bid is to bully your neighbors with economic threats for speaking our minds when we are only trying to eek out a living, just like everyone else. I stand with Mr. Dale and I stand against bullying. -Jon Gold Sunnyside Up

CONTACT US: 541.224.6873 The Alchemist Weekly welcomes freelance submissions. Manuscripts will be returned if you include a self-addressed, stamped envelope. letters@thealchemistweekly.com, news@thealchemistweekly.com, submissions@thealchemistweekly.com, editor@thealchemistweekly.com calendar@thealchemistweekly.com, ads@thealchemistweekly.com

• THE

I will renew this request infrequently. This is not to generate income. I want to retrieve/harvest/gather/glean neighborhood produce. I'm talkin' mostly about fruit trees that drop on sidewalks and streets, the stuff that stays and eventually disintegrates in the yard. I just need to know where the trees are around town. I know where a few are, please let me know where others are so I can generate a map. Cross streets or address, type of fruit, and if possible, name of and permission from person owning or otherwise responsible for the tree would be helpful. The plan is to utilize fruit that would otherwise go to waste. Help, please.

Love

Here in the immediate wake of Saint Valentine's day, I would like you to take some time to reflect on different types of love. In 1973, John Lee wrote The Colors of Love, providing me with basis for another wonderful mnemonic. When in France, I use LESPAM, but here in the Americas, ELSPAM (Eros Ludus Storge Pragma Agape Mania) is applicable. Like a color wheel, Lee identifies primary and secondary loves, those secondary being blends of the primaries. The concept is well worth a wiki-read (just Google "love styles wiki”). For me, I now have something to explain the pain. It's good to be a masochist.

Sustainable Siphoning

So, after the City Council voted twice to apply the Sustainability Initiative Fees (Second vote because the first wasn't unanimous, 5-4 both times), the 18 person Budget Commission (nine city council members, nine citizens) voted 11-4 (3 abstain or absent) to rescind the fee, prompting a third City Council vote, and Councilor Brauner to state, "When the majority of council has spoken, I think it's inappropriate to continue to bring these up." Welcome to the process, Councilor. When the Budget Commission's entire citizen contingent (minus one absent and a Parks and Rec. employee abstaining) votes to rescind the fee, and the only supporters are the same City Councilors (four present, one supporter absent) voting to implement the fee, supporters' credibility as citizen representatives diminishes. Support for the upcoming property tax bond measure is compromised when citizens see a council willing to take what they can, regardless of citizen input.

CartsWagonsCoaches

The thoughts, views, and opinions expressed in Voice are of their authors and do not necessarily represent the thoughts, views or opinions of CorvAlcheMedia, LLC. Letters to the editor may be edited for grammar, clarity, or space restrictions.

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D I Rstir T

This is what I get for missing a deadline. I get to read the Saturday GazetteTimes article about the food cart debate. A couple-three weeks previous, a downtown restaurateur expressed concern that food carts would undermine his investment, commenting on trash/debris and business restroom use by patrons of the food carts.

He also used the term "taco truck,” in his vernacular, when referring to these carts. Oh the horror. The person has since been referred to, more than once, as "racist” (would they defend the bugs if he had said "roach coach"?), and the issue flared. An anonymous Craigslist rant called for a boycott of restaurants opposing year-round food cart operation, going so far as to state, “NO ONE should limit American FREE ENTERPRISE.” Limitless free enterprise is a great idea, ask any mega corporation. There are reasons for rules. In response to presumed unfair advantages of carts, one proponent of food carts presumed, "...none of the people who opened a sit-down restaurant in Corvallis ever had to have a public hearing to set their hours.” I bet there have been countless meetings to get the food service industry in Corvallis where it is today, including consideration of hours of operation. Not too long ago there were meetings regarding outdoor seating areas, dimensions and times of use. Every so often there are meetings covering things that do confront the food service industry. Like the one today (Tuesday, Feb. 15), 5:30 pm, at the Fire Station. I keep seeing the issue brought up as one of year-round operation, while there is currently a 45-day limit. Thing is, the 45-day limit refers to operating in any one location. Carts can operate all year as long as they move around. Food carts will compete with existing food services, extent determined by the location the carts set up. Shoot. Find half a dozen spots around town and move every month and a half. Take the other hundred days and vacation, maintain or upgrade one's equipment, or go on a festival/concert/fair circuit, whatever. I get the feeling the food cart folk want a year-round location like the Portland carts. OK, code inspectors won't have to track down carts at various locations. Fine, cart vendors can provide lavatories, hand washing facilities, trash receptacles, and some seating. We need to distinguish between carts (2-wheel), wagons (4-wheel), and coaches (openings to side, 4-wheel), motorized and non-motorized, towed and self-propelled. The vendors need to be readily mobile, able to close up and move in minutes (let’s say, less than 60). We need a little perspective here. Portland has a much denser population, making things like the 10th and Alder collection somewhat viable. There is some turnover in food services, often a vendor simply changing name and menu. Many, maybe most, of the vehicles are towed, 2-wheel trailers. Before Corvallis free-hands their own statutes and regulations on this focus, existing state and county statutes and regulations, as well as the statutes and regulations surrounding mobile food vendors in similar sized communities need to be scrutinized. If you're looking for me this evening, I'll probably be at the circus (meeting). -CJt dirtstirreply@gmail.com

ALCHEMIST WEEKLY• FEBRUARY 15-FEBRUARY 21, 2011

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What is your normal, preferred sleep attire?

Um, I am someone that loves pajamas. I know I’m like a sex expert, and people probably want me to say naked, but I have really sensitive skin and have really nice sheets, but yes I need to have pajamas. I have dog pajamas, they have dogs on them, that my mother-in-law made for me. I’m a wholesome girl at heart, really.

Would you rather have the power of flight or invisibility?

Flight, because there are so many places that I need to go, and I travel so much as it is that I lose a lot of time that way, and there are so many people I love that are not in close proximity to me. So, yes, flight, definitely.

If you were a bar drink what drink would you be?

That’s easy. Really, really expensive champagne. I don’t really drink, except on special occasions, so I am usually drinking because I’m toasting, but I hate bad champagne. I like bubbly things.

If you could spend the day with one historical figure who would it be? Why?

I mean, I guess it would be Alfred Kinsey. If I could sit in on some of his research, pick his brain, just have dinner with him and let him just talk to me for hours.

If you had to choose one historical figure to have a threesome with the above historical figure, who and why?

Oh, god…oh my god. It’s gotta be someone who would be into strap-on sex, because I bet Alfred Kinsey liked it in the butt…I’m gonna go with…I’m gonna go with Joan of Arc. And a strap-on, for Alfred. In like a seedy, underground gay sex club that we’ve somehow snuck into. Yes.

If you had to spend one million

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Smell is the sense most tied to memory, with that in mind, what smell do you fear the most?

That’s a great question. I don’t have a great sense of smell, but I am severely sensitive to the smell of any perfume or cologne. So when I step into an elevator and get a whiff of someone’s insane cologne or perfume, that they’ve put on way too much of, I get a migraine. So yes, that makes me panic.

What is a personal cure when you get nervous?

Breathing and centering. A mini-meditation works for me.

What is a personal cure when you get sad?

I would say that, I eat something that I like, which is almost always chocolate…and I would phone a friend. Definitely, chocolate and phone a friend.

Where do we go when we die?

My hope is that I go where my dogs are… I wanna be with my dogs when I die. Yes.

Favorite Beatles song? Probably Imagine.

One luxury item you cannot live without?

Um, well, insanely overpriced designer glasses. I just got these glasses, and spent way too much on them. I love my glasses, I think of them as so much of a part of me. If given the choice of contacts or laser surgery, I don’t want it. I want glasses and I want them to be really frickin cute.

If aliens landed and asked you to go with them, would you?

Tough one. I’m gonna say no. There’s a lot

FEBRUARY 15-FEBRUARY 21, 2011

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I mean, I think it would be sushi. I would like a variety, but I really like the Westernized, bastardized kind of sushi, I like a lot of special sauces and special rolls with cutesy names. And, a good spicy avocado roll goes a long way.

It can’t be hum a n i tarian… h m m m . Frivolous and selfish…umm, I think, could I buy like a small yacht or a cruise ship for that? Like a used cruise ship? One that you could have like 75 or so people together, partying on the ocean. So yes, party yacht… with a staff…and 75 of my closest friends.

ww

What would your death row meal consist of?

oto

Obviously I’m gonna say a butt plug. I mean I love butt plugs; because they’re so simple, but their simplicity is really deceptive because they can just bring such incredible pleasure to people…so yea, a butt plug.

dollars in a completely frivolous and selfish manner, how would you blow it?

Ph

If you could be any inanimate object, what would you be? Why?

If you had to give up one sense (sight, taste, hearing, touch, smell) what would it be? Why? ted

Interview by Jimbo Ivy

What do you drink when you are thirsty?

Yes. We lost one of our dogs this fall, on Halloween. My partner carved this incredibly elaborate pumpkin with a Boston Terrier on it, which is what our dog Jordan was, and we brought it outside to take pictures, lit all these candles, and they were all blown out one by one, but there was no wind. ibu

Tristan Taormino

Have you ever seen a ghost?

ntr

THE DEGREE

four and at nap time, we got our own rooms in her house, and I used to masturbate to help me fall asleep.

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third

to do here on Earth. I feel called to help people with their sex lives and my work is not done here on Earth yet.

Hearing. I think it would be interesting to experience the world without hearing it. I think it might cut down on the chatter in my head. Well, I was thinking of smell, but your taste really gets f***ed up, and I really love food, so I need that.

Karaoke song of choice?

Dead Or Alive by Bon Jovi. I’m a complicated person.

Favorite Painter?

Umm...Sean Callahan. We went on vacation to Key West, and we bought an amazing water color of a bulldog. We collect art, and especially dog art, we love dogs, and we actually got to meet him, the artist. It’s so much more meaningful to look at a piece of art in your house and know that you met the person behind it, personally.

What is more annoying, whistling or humming?

Whistling. Because whistling can be directed in inappropriate ways. You can’t hum at someone in an inappropriate way.

Favorite Movie?

I really love Requiem for a Dream. I really like Darren Aronofsky, the director, who just did Black Swan. It’s just…really dark… and the vision…years and years later I can still call up images from it. He has a very powerful vision and can convey it in such a way that it sticks with you, forever.

Favorite Anatomical feature of the opposite or same sex?

The Butt. The most obvious, for me, but… I’ll be predictable here.

What is your earliest memory?

My earliest memory is of masturbating. I was four. I know I was four because I went to this very particular baby sitter when I was

Lemonade. Preferably fresh squeezed. I drink it year round and people think I’m crazy; it’s ten below and I’m drinking lemonade.

Favorite holiday? Why?

Christmas. We in recent years have been volunteering and delivering meals to people with this local synagogue that does all this amazing work during the Christmas season; it’s really rewarding and fun and just re-frames the whole holiday for me.

What has been the most defining moment of your life to date?

Meeting my partner. Yea. We are about to celebrate 10 years together, actually we’ll be in Oregon when we do it. I just can’t imagine [life] without Colten. I just can’t. So yea, that’s my moment.

Favorite activity that should be considered a sport? Anal fisting. Mhmm.

Favorite Book?

House Rules by Heather Louis.

Favorite Disney Character?

The Little Mermaid. Not from the actual cartoon; I had this book of it when I was a kid (the original Hans Christian Andersen version), and my memory of it [was] very twisted. In order to be able to walk on land, she had to endure this tremendous amount of pain, and I read it when I was 8, and it’s very intense and really about the choices that we make and sacrifice, and about the tradeoffs that we make in life. I haven’t seen the actual one, so I’m sure it’s very Disney-fied, but yes, The Little Mermaid.

If you knew you only had 24 hours to live, how you spend your final day?

I would fly to Belize with as many friends as I could get, and snorkel the Barrier Reef. My party yacht from earlier would really help with that, if I could bring it.

What question aren't people asked enough? What do you value most?

Please answer that question?

My chosen family; my partner, my friends…I have a tiny family of origin and many of them have gone to the other side, so they are my family now. My dogs. Other people’s patience. Unconditional love. Being seen.

What word do people/you use too much?

I probably say ‘literally’ too much. Also, when I’m really horrified, surprised, disgusted, pissed-off, shocked, I say “REALLY?!” That too.

Is it better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all?

Yes, definitely. I think that loving is the most powerful thing we can do, and it’s also the most difficult. But, I wouldn’t give up the chance to love someone, even if they

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verdict were going to leave the next day. Cause I would love them for that day.

Is it better to be lucky or skilled?

Skilled. I am a self-made person… growing up I didn’t have any money, and people always ask me ‘what’s your secret? you built this career for yourself ’. I’m like, ‘There’s no secret, I just work my ass off, people!’ I feel like there are chance encounters and things happen, but I don’t feel like it’s all about luck because the luck can come to you and you could not see it, you could leave it on the ground, not pick up the phone, all these different choices. You can’t rely on luck.

Is there a God?

I think there’s a higher power. I believe in the universe giving you opportunities, helping you, pushing you, challenging you, opening doors, closing doors…but the God that condemns queer people, the God that says women shouldn’t have the right to have abortions, the God who says kill people, in my name…I don’t believe in that God.

Spacey disappoints, but not like Abramoff by TIM HELLMAN

C

asino Jack is a political comedy loosely based on Washington, D.C. lobbyist Jack Abramoff and his conviction for fraud, among other things. Kevin Spacey stars as Abramoff and was nominated for a Golden Globe for his decent, but not outstanding, performance. The film co-stars Barry Pepper and Jon Lovitz in impressive supporting roles. It was written by Norman Snider and directed by George Hickenlooper, who died seven weeks before its national release date. The film is a Hollywood biography detailing Jack Abramoff's corrupt career, which led him, as well as nine other lobbyists, congressional staffers, and a couple White House officials to convictions and prison sentences. Pepper co-stars as Michael Scanlon, Abramoff's protégé and partner for most of the scandal. The two spearheaded a conspiracy, which

involved fraud and the extortion of Native Americans, as well as the bribing of public officials for political favors. The film is played out in a dark comedic way, but its subject matter is depressing and disturbing, which makes for a somewhat odd and misguided film. The performances are mostly impressive, but I don't think it's one of Spacey's better works, and certainly undeserving of any award nominations (but his career has been a little disappointing lately, I think he's a little too full of himself ). The directing is adequate, but as I said probably the wrong tone for the material. That's greatly due to the script as well, which is kind of witty and clever, but uneven, and a little too all over the place. The politics are interesting and depressing, and the film is especially dark because there's no one to root for or care about, with the exception of Kelly Preston, who plays Abramoff's wife and

Graham Greene, who plays a SubChief of a victimized Native American tribe (but their characters are too small and underdeveloped). The film has some strengths, and is a little entertaining, but it's mostly a miss.

Three-headed restaurant review: del Alma by TAW

I

nteresting conversations and experiences always arise whenever The Alchemist Weekly crew takes a step back from the deadline-centric newspaper business to allow our minds to freely wonder. We make it a point to ensure these experiences take place on a regular basis. This week del Alma, located at 136 SW Washington Ave., suite 102 provided the perfect backdrop.

Noah

Since its construction, The Riverfront building in downtown Corvallis is almost as defining to the area as the Courthouse. Fortunately, Lady Justice will have no equal. The Riverfront building is anchored by a beautiful multi-tiered dining room that was originally occupied by local favorite Iovino’s. The space is one of the most interesting in downtown Corvallis. The current occupant is del Alma owned by one of the best bartenders in town, Kinn Edwards. You may remember Kinn from his work with Aqua’s fabulous cocktail list. The most surprising thing about del Alma was the menu. I had no idea that they would be serving items that I’ve only found in one of my favorite Portland restaurants, Pambiche, which is a great Cuban place. This evening I chose from the Especiales. The Braised Bison Short Ribs with New Mexico chili demi glaze, sautéed winter chanterelles, and vanilla whipped sweet potatoes were special indeed. Matching it with a classic del Alma Margarita I was able to envision returning to the establishment to explore the unique menu. del Alma has great potential to become the much needed anchor to the south end of First St. They have the perfect space, original menu, and stellar drink list. All Mr. Edwards needs now is that same community spirit that has

allowed local hotspots like American Dream, Block 15 and Downward Dog to thrive.

Courtney

As the token female of our threesome, it never surprises me when my coworkers have relationship questions to entertain my way. del Alma, with its quintessential date setting and romantic ambiance ensued a slew of inquiries from Stanley and Noah. As we spooned our Dark Chocolate, Peanut Lamb Mole’ appetizer, a rich and creamy potion with bing cherries and anchovy seasoned corn tortilla crisps the boys began to ask what charms a man can present in order to woo a female of interest. Hypothetically, would it impress her if, prior to the date an arrangement with the maitre d’ was made in order to make it appear as though the male is a regular patron of a fine establishment, such as del Alma? Perhaps, but it’s a tad dishonest and could backfire should the relationship progress beyond one date. All were in agreement that the idea was ludicrous. As our entrees arrived, mine the Dungeness Crabmeat, Shrimp, and Spinach Emapanada, conversation had shifted to whether or not all bullets result in a sonic boom, thus I focused on my meal. The perfectly golden and flaky crust of the empanadas provided a wonderful balance for the soft seafood filling while the plum-tomatopoblano-pepper salsa bestowed a stark and welcome bit of spice. I have made a habit of ordering off the appetizer menu for my main course, as I always want to have room for desert. My two petite empanadas had me perfectly primed for sharing the Mango pie. A dollop of freezing cold ice cream accompanied the pie, which was much like an apple pie, with chunks of the fruit instead of a puree. The Latin cuisine del Alma provides is not one I am accustomed to, and I am looking forward to more enchanting and

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decadent evenings at this establishment.

Stanley

What struck me about del Alma was the warm glow of the interior, the tasteful brevity of the menu, the carefully paired dinnerware, and the sharp comfort that was present throughout my dining experience. It was, as they say, the picture of elegance. We started with the Mole’. For my entrée I had a tamale and cheese concoction, and also some of Noah’s entree’, the spare ribs. For dessert, we shared the mango pie. The food was exotic, yet familiar and quite pleasing to the palette. Everything was as it should be, the service was impeccable and friendly, the food was served hot but not piping hot, and the drinks were all iced and refreshed in a non-obtrusive manner. Now is when it got weird, the good kind of weird. The stuff that makes life interesting. Because of coincidence or serendipity, we ordered an appetizer that perhaps was not meant for sharing, but share it we did. We dove in with spoons and forks and began all eating this wonderfully exotic Mole’ as one, like a pack of Hyenas. It felt good to share, but it also felt odd. And I like odd. The art of communal eating is something that is common in other cultures, and I had experienced it before...but not in this setting, and not with these friends. The sharing of food extended itself throughout the entire meal. I think I sampled something from everyone’s plate and we may have even shared forks at some point. It left me feeling connected to the food and my dining companions. The only thing missing was that we were not hand feeding each other or passing food directly from our mouths. I think that may be a stretch, but I will definitely attempt it at some point.

CALL TO

ARTISTS AND MUSICIANS, AND FOOD VENDORS AND VOLUNTEERS

INTERESTED?

Call Sheri 541-602-6215 or email sheridover@gmail.com

CorvallisArtisansMarket.org

ALCHEMIST WEEKLY• FEBRUARY 15-FEBRUARY 21, 2011

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Corvallis

Sunnyside Up Café Celtic Jam, 7:00 pm [CELTIC]

live music

live music Corvallis

First Congregational United OSU Voice Faculty: An Evening of Songs and Arias, 7:30 pm [VOICE] First United Methodist Craig Hanson, 12:15 pm, FREE [PIANO]

sing

Corvallis

Lebanon

Peacock Bar and Grill East The Brand , every other Wednesday, 7:00 pm [BLUES]

Peacock Bar & Grill Karaoke, 9:00 pm, FREE Unitarian Universalist Fellowship Fellowship Community Choir rehearsals, 7:00 pm, $50 for 12 week term

Tangent

Lebanon

Dixie Creek Saloon Blues Jam with Wild Bill [BLUES]

Merlin’s Bar & Grill Karaoke

Halsey

Peacock Bar and Grill Karaoke Applebee's Karaoke/Guitar Hero

dance

Lebanon

Merlin's Bar and Grill Karaoke

Corvallis Elks Lodge Beginner Line Dance 7:00 pm, $3 Impulse Bar & Grill Cuban Salsa 7:30 pm FREE Peacock Bar and Grill On the Top: DJ Big Cheese, 9:00 pm FREE OSU Women’s Building Room 112 Salsa Dancing 8:00 pm

Albany

dance

Eagles Lodge Albany Senior Dance, 1:30 - 3:30 pm, $3

Lebanon

Corvallis

Cascade Performing Arts Center Beginner Adult Ballet Classes, 7:30-8:30 pm, $5

Peter Gysegem’s Studio Argentine tango classes, 7:15 pm, $5 Old World Deli Belly dance, 8:00 pm, $5 Peacock Bar and Grill On the Top: DJ Mike 9:00 pm, FREE

stuff

Corvallis

sing

Corvallis

Woody’s Bar & Grill “Terry-oke” karaoke with Terry Geil, 9:00 pm. FREE

Corvallis

16

wednesday

tuesday

Applebee's National Trivia Association Night, 9:00 pm, FREE Enoteca Wine Bar Girls night out! Knit night, 7:00 pm [CRAFT} OSU LaSells Stewart Center Tristan Taormino: Claiming Your Sexual Power, 7:00 pm, FREE [LEARN] OSU MU 213 Clashes and Crashes at the Intersections of Identities: Empowering LGBT College Students and Unanticipated Pushback, noon WineStyles Tuesday Night Trivia (Winter League) 6 pm [FUN]

Lebanon

Merlin's Bar and Grill Karaoke

Albany

stuff

Albany Senior Center Center Dating Game Show & Banquet, 12:00 pm, $9 [FUN]

Corvallis

alchemist pick Finally, it ends

Tuesday, February 15th Finally, the protracted and undoubtedly most interesting public melodrama of the year, to date, will come to an end on Tuesday, February 15th, at 5 pm. The factions will square off for the much anticipated conclusion at the downtown firehouse, located at 400 NW Harrison Blvd., in Corvallis. And then it’s all over...we’ll sort of. The meeting at the firehouse is a public forum hosted by the Corvallis Downtown Commission where concerned citizens/ business owners/prospective cart owners/ rubberneckers can all pile in and witness the melee. But the Corvallis Downtown Commission will not make any final solutions at the meeting. They will listen and then go somewhere else and think about it. But even then they will not decide.

Instead they will take their recommendation to the City Council, and then the City Council will debate amongst themselves on the recommendations that the Corvallis Downtown Commission provides. Then the City Council will decree and then ceremoniously wash their hands a la Pontius Pilate. So if you’re into fiascos, which we all are to one extent or another...I know I am, admit it to yourself. Come pack the firehouse meeting room and go “on the record”. Whether you are for or against this soap opera, you can come and see the season finale. It is destined to be filled with tense moments, vigorous head shaking, clapping and if you’re lucky some shouting matches. Whatever happens, I’m sure more than a few of us will be glad that issue is finally going to end, because frankly Corvallis needs another controversy, this one is getting a bit overcooked.

Arts Center Portfolio Reviews, 7:00 pm, $5 Cloud 9 Beer and Blog, 5:00 pm, FREE Enoteca Wine Bar Wine Tasting: King Estate Wine tasting, 7:00 pm, $10 [ONCE IT HITS YOUR LIPS] OSU Fairbanks Gallery “Type/Life, a Forest of Floating Typography,” 4:30 pm, FREE [ART] OSU LaSells Stewart Center Author Frank Warren of PostSecret, 6:30 pm [postsecret.com]

Albany

live music

Calapooia Brewing North Coast Limited, 7:00 pm, FREE [ROOTS]

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thursday thursday

Corvallis

Bombs Away Cafe Curtis Monette & Friends, 9:00 pm, FREE [ACOUSTIC] Cloud 9 Udon, Homemade Green Tea, 9:00 pm, FREE [J-POP] Old World Deli Old Time Music Jam, 7:00 pm, FREE [OLD TIME] Papa’s Pizza Parlor Northwest Banjo Band, 6:30 pm [BANJO, yo]

sing

Corvallis

Peacock Bar and Grill Karaoke

Lebanon

Merlin's Bar and Grill Karaoke

Albany

dance

Eagles Lodge Line dancing, 7:00 pm, $4 Riley's Bar & Grill Cutting Edge Productions presents Throwback Thursday with Dj Tray, FREE [DJ]

Corvallis

Peacock Bar and Grill On the Top: DJ Mike, 9:00 pm, FREE Old World Deli Belly dance, 8:00 pm, $5

Philomath

Philomath Middle School Family-friendly swing dance lessons, 6:30 pm, FREE

Corvallis

stuff

CHS Theater CHS Theater “Inherit the Wind,” 7:00 pm, $10 [STAGE] Enoteca Wine Bar Chocolate Truffle Thursdays, 6:00 pm FREE [YUMMERS] First Alternative North Beer tasting, 2nd and 4th Thursdays, 5:00 pm [BEER ME] Live Well Studio Free teen yoga class, 4:00 pm, FREE [TEEN YOGA] OSU LaSells Stewart Center “Restrepo,” 6:30 pm [FILM] OSU Owen Hall Room 102 Mary Wood, “Nature’s Trust: Environmental Law for the New Ecological Age,” 7:00 pm, FREE [LECTURE] OSU Richardson Hall Room 107 Paul Owen, “World Wood Products Market: How Do They Impact Oregon?” 3:30 pm [LECTURE] Pegasus Art Gallery Bill Shumway, “Painting with Light,” 6:00 pm, FREE [ART] WineStyles New arrivals wine tasting, 5:30 pm, $5 [WINE]

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FEBRUARY 15-FEBRUARY 21, 2011

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ALCHEMIST WEEKLY• WWW.THEALCHEMISTWEEKLY.COM


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10 am Finding a Healthy Sexual Balance, MU 206

Toward a Queer of Color Critique: Defying the Homonormative, MU 207 It’s a Man’s World: How Sexism Affects Men, MU Council A Modern Approach to Consent, MU Board The Curious Lives of Sex Toys, MU Journey SEXversations: a Card Game, NAL What’s One More?: Polyamory, Non-Monogamy, and Relationship Diversity, WC

11 am Crossing Borderlands, Mestiza Consciousness, and the Road to Affinity, MU 206

Sexism affects men (cont.d), MU Council Conservatism and Modern Sexuality: Is it a Paradox?, MU Board Fabulously Fetish, MU Journey Sexversations (cont.d), NAL What’s one more... (cont.d), WC

Sexual License: the Halfway Point between Culture and Biology, MU 207 Sex and Shame (cont.d), MU Board Fabulously Fetish, MU Journey LGBT Access (cont.d) , NAL Talking Taboo (cont.d), WC

3 pm Crossing Borderlands, Mestiza Consciousness, and the Road to Affinity, MU 207

Culture of the Clit, MU Council A Modern Approach to Consent, MU Board The Liberated Relationship, MU Journey

Dixie Creek Saloon Hudson Dean, 7:00 pm, FREE [DUO]

sing

Corvallis

Peacock Bar and Grill Karaoke

Halsey

Woody's Bar and Grill “Terry-oke” karaoke with Terry Geil, 9:00 pm, FREE

Lebanon

Duffy’s Irish Pub Karaoke, 10:00 pm, FREE Merlin's Bar and Grill Karaoke

Albany

dance

Riley's Bar & Grill Cutting Edge Production presents Ladies Night with Dj Tray, FREE

Corvallis

4 pm More than Two-Spirits: Native American Gender Constructions, MU 206

Sexual License: the Halfway Point between Culture and Biology, MU 207 Your Sexual Bill of Rights, MU Board Liberated Rel (cont.d), MU Journey Porn as a Feminist Tool (4-6pm) 5 pm Finding a Healthy Sexual Balance, MU 206

Your Sexual Bill of Rights(cont.d), MU Board The Curious Lives of Sex Toys, MU Journey Porn as a Feminist Tool (cont.d), WC

alchemist picks

WWW.THEALCHEMISTWEEKLY.COM

Beanery on 2nd Jaw Knee Now and Marquee, 8:00 pm, FREE [ACOUSTIC] Belle Vallee Tasting Room Ralph Penunuri, 5 pm, FREE [ACOUSTIC] Benton Center The Acorn Bros, 12:00 pm, FREE [ROOTS] Bombs Away Cafe Wolfbeater, 10:00 pm, FREE [ROCK] Fireworks Al Rivers, 8:00 pm, FREE [BLUES] LaSells Stewart Center OSU Emerald City Jazz Kings: Night and Day, 7:30 pm, $20 [JAZZ] OSU Memorial Union Lounge Music a la Carte - Icicle Creek Piano Trio, noon, FREE [PIANO]

Tangent

2 pm Toward a Queer of Color Critique: Defying the Homonormative, MU 206

Wednesday, February 16 In any artistic endeavor, whether it be writing, painting, music or really anything, it is ALWAYS a good thing to have your work constructively criticized. Without this, you will never be able to maximize the quality of your self expression in terms of broad appeal and understanding. The criticism of your art, as any artist can attest, can sometimes a painful process. I experienced this personally at my first writer’s workshop in college. I sat silently as a team of fellow writers ripped my piece to shreds in front of me, calling out all the mistakes and enumerating them in painful detail. I felt a strong desire to leap across the table at one point, but restrained myself...I was glad that I did. As the criticism sank in, I amended/reworked my piece according to the group’s suggestions. What resulted was an astoundingly better story. When we read through it again, days later, I received praise and good vibes from all and it made me feel incredible. I read the first draft again and compared the two, I couldn’t believe I had felt so attached to what now read like a child’s scribblings. So this is why workshops are so valuable, I thought. I have been a staunch proponent of them ever since. You simply cannot do without them. For local visual artists the opportunity to have yourself torn down gently and built up again in betterment is at hand. On Wednesday, February 16, from 7-8:30 pm, The Arts Center at 700 SW Madison Ave., Corvallis, will be holding Portfolio Reviews. They will continue on the following third Wednesday of each month (3/16, 4/20 and 5/18). You must sign up ahead of time and hurry because the group is limited to 5 artists each month. It is suggested that you bring 3 to 5 pieces, and if your works are too large for transport, you can bring high resolution photos instead. The event will be led my Oregon Arts Alliance Director Robert Tomlinson. The Portfolio Review is free for members and $5 for all non-members. For further information you can call (541) 754-1551 or visit their web site at theartscenter.net.

live music

Merlin's Bar and Grill No Way Out, 9:00 pm [CLASSIC ROCK]

Trans Health Advocates, MU Council Sexuality, Shame, and Sex-Positivity (1-3pm), MU Board Culture of the Clit, MU Journey Power and Access: Exploring Privilege in LGBT Student Populations, NAL Talking Taboo, WC

Criticize Me

Corvallis

Lebanon

1 pm More than Two-Spirits: Native American Gender Constructions, MU 206

f riday friday 18

Cloud 9 “Riot in the Clouds,” 10:00 pm, FREE [DJ] Peacock Bar and Grill On the Top: DJ Alex, 9:00 pm, FREE

Albany

stuff

Albany Civic Theater “The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee,” 8:00 pm, $13 [TO BEE NOR TOO BEE NOR TUBE-E]

Corvallis

CoHo Ecovillage Welcome Weekend through the 20th, FREE [VISIT] CHS Theater “Inherit the Wind,” 7:00 pm, $10 [STAGE] First Alternative South Wine tasting, 5:00 pm, [WINE] OSU LaSells Stewart Center “Song for the Blue Ocean,” 9:00 am, FREE, http://springcreek.oregonstate.edu [LECTURE SERIES] Unitarian Universalist Fellowship “The Laramie Project,” 7:30 pm, FREE [FILM] WineStyles Friday Flights, 5:00 pm [WINE]

Enter Merlin's with No Way Out

Friday February 18th You can’t live in or around Corvallis and not love original and local music. Or maybe you can, but you wouldn’t tell anyone. No worries, Merlin’s Bar and Grill in Lebanon has got you covered this weekend as the cover band No Way Out will be playing covers ranging in genres from blues, rock, and country. There’s sure to be something you can sing along to, and I’m sure the dance floor at Merlin’s has been primed for some boot-scooting. It’ll be the perfect time to grab some new scenery and head-on down I34 to Lebanon where the beer is cold and the atmosphere is unassuming. No Way Out is playing Friday and Saturday, starting at 9 pm. Merlin’s Bar and Grill is cash only and is located at 45 W. Sherman St.

• THE

Contributed Photo

ALCHEMIST WEEKLY• FEBRUARY 15-FEBRUARY 21, 2011

7


word

Dorr's perception is infinite Jake Dorr shows his world view through his artwork.

photo by Lauren Hurt

System Upgrade - "I have always been struck by the juxtaposition of different elements from across time and space. Combine that with my interest in American history and we have a collision of two cultures in this piece.¨ Acrylic on canvas

by COURTNEY CLENNEY Art by Jake Dorr

T

here is no more land on the globe to discover and this saddens Jake Dorr. In the very early 1800s Thomas Jefferson wrote a letter to Lewis and Clark, imploring them on a mission to discover the West coast, to travel over the Rocky Mountains, thus leaving the US entirely. The letter, included advice to be kind and learn from the Natives they would encounter, but also comprised instructions that no matter what the cost, the explorers were to return home—even if that meant sailing on a boat all the way around South America to do so. When Dorr came across a transcript of this letter he grieved the loss of discovery, the loss of exploration that our generation will never experience in a tangible way. And so, he painted the Thomas Jefferson Memorial, in ruin. To feed his desire to explore, Dorr seeks to create a world that only exists to him. He could paint still life images, but beautiful as they may be, he chooses to paint possibilities instead of realities. Through Dorr’s art, you and I can discover the world he sees. “Things in real life can look really impressive, but I think it’s more fun to create something of what’s possible, of what might not be real, but it can be in your imagination,” he says. In Dorr’s imagination he sees the finished product of an idea hanging on a museum wall, but the potential for a new

8

Thomas Jefferson Memorial - Mixed media on canvas vision of something can almost cripple him. “Before I can make that come alive as a real piece, there’s a process involved and there’s a story behind each piece,” he says. Boxes full of files and files full of ideas and sketches continue to wait on Dorr for their breath of life. The way Dorr speaks about art it could easily define him fully, but it doesn’t. After high school in Philomath, he went to Trinity Western University in British Columbia, Canada, where he studied art and religious studies. He and his wife lived and traveled abroad for a time. But then, in 2006 they moved back to Corvallis embarking on a vision they shared with some friends: to take spiritual things and move them into the context of Corvallis. And the church named Doxology was formed. A year ago he and his wife adopted a little boy from Ethiopia. Dorr expresses his view of the world in a visual medium, but he experiences others views of the world on a daily basis, and it fascinates him. He works at Hoover

FEBRUARY 15-FEBRUARY 21, 2011

• THE

Elementary School in the resource center with students that have autism. “I have a job that I don’t consider work,” Dorr says. “I want the result of my day to help as many people as possible to find hope in the world.” He is also involved with the Social Communication Clinic where he teaches young, developmentally disabled people to take on a new perspective and see the world in diverse ways. “Those kinds of activities are really mutually teachable, you learn a lot from your students and they learn a lot from the teachers,” Dorr says. A self-professed follower of Jesus, Dorr’s ideas of religion bend the mold of some current religious systems in order to reach beyond the structure and boxes around which people have built their ideas about faith. He expresses a dislike of organized religion and the rigid and structured set of circumstances they follow. “I’m a lot more interested in seeing people seek a divine presence that’s not part of ourselves, it’s not part of our own

Mixed Feelings - "This piece is a tribute to the European cubist tradition. A lot of people try to psychoanalyze the abstract structures of cubism, to decipher it's "true meaning.¨ But, for me there is no greater way to express the complete opposite of this--spontaneous form and gesture--than to use the cubist paradigm. The reshaping of how we see things can be a beautiful thing.¨ Acrylic on canvas

ALCHEMIST WEEKLY• WWW.THEALCHEMISTWEEKLY.COM


systems, or our own philosophy, but a lot more about seeking a greater power, a power that can speak into our lives,” he says. Dorr needs to create. He has to document life as it happens to him. “I think that’s part of what art means, [it] is expression of how we live life in the moment because everything can change,” he says. Although our generation may not ever be able to claim new land, Dorr believes we are pioneers and cowboys of a different frontier— the digital frontier. A world so intriguing it consumes our existence, we become what our Facebook says. Dorr is using the digital realm to create art as well, with digital collages. “In modernity we’re able to take things that are already there and re-assemble them into a unique piece that totally has its own merit and its own soul,” Dorr explains. He also is creat-

word

ing with silk-screening, in which he may take a T-shirt that already has a design on it, but he puts something original over the top of it, devising a ‘reclaimed T-shirt.’ “I think spiritually and also in the physical life that’s what I like to do is reclaim things,” he says. “Why not give something a better purpose that has more hope, even if it’s a dirty T-shirt.” A few months ago Dorr and his friend, Jake Dockter exhibited some collaborations at the LaSells Stewart Center. The theme of the show was juxtaposition of past and present. These pieces went through an exploration of history in contrast to ideals and objects of desire that we hold on to so dearly. Art has a way of bringing to light what people try to ignore or are even unaware of entirely. Dorr himself is sometimes struck by how dynamic and influential an artist can be—it’s powerful.

Chocolate! FANTASY

2010 Alchemist Winner: FAVORITE MUSIC VENUE

FAVORITE APPETIZER

FAVORITE PLACE TO SPEND $10 FAVORITE PLACE TO GET PICKED UP

– LIVE MUSIC THIS WEEK –

THURSDAY

FEB 17 9p | FREE

CURTIS MONETTE & FRIENDS

FRIDAY

FEB 18 10p | FREE

FEBRUARY 26 • 6PM

Photograph by Harold Wood

WOLFBEATER

WWW • THEARTSCENTER • NET

CLUB LEVEL, RESER STADIUM CHOCOLATE • ART • MUSIC • FUN!

The Arts Center 700 SW MADISON • 541 754 1551

WWW.THEALCHEMISTWEEKLY.COM

• THE

SATURDAY

FEB 19

10p | FREE YOYA + GREENHORSE

2527 NW Monroe

Corvallis, OR 541.757.7221 bombsawaycafe.com

ALCHEMIST WEEKLY• FEBRUARY 15-FEBRUARY 21, 2011

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live music

Calapooia Brewing Blues Jam, 4:00 pm [ACOUSTIC] Novak's Hungarian Restaurant Strings of Time, 6:00 pm, FREE [FOLK]

Corvallis

Corvallis

Beanery on 2nd Aaron Gabriel, 8:00 pm, FREE [ACOUSTIC] Bombs Away Cafe yoYa with Greenhorse, 10:00 pm, FREE [ROCK] Interzone Fjords, Angries, and the Bombpops from San Diego, 7:00 pm, $3, ALL AGES [ROCK] Troubadour Music Brian Bowers, 8:00 pm, $10 [AUTOHARP]

Fireworks The Infallible Collective, 8:00 pm, FREE [JAZZ] OSU LaSells Stewart Center Steinway Piano Series – Stephen Baus, 4:00 pm, $25

Lebanon

Lebanon Tangent

Dixie Creek Saloon Forrestalls Fall, 9:30 pm, FREE [HARD ROCK]

Albany

Corvallis

sing

dance

Boys and Girls Club 5-week Swing Dance Class, 7:00 – 9:00 pm FCC Gatton Hall Corvallis Folklore Society Contra Dance, 8:00 pm, $6 Peacock Bar and Grill On the Top: DJ Big Cheese, 9:00 pm FREE

Corvallis

dance

stuff

Darkside Cinema Crossroads International Film Festival, 1:30, 4:00 and 6:30 pm, $8, This week: "Kannathil Muthamittal (A Peck On The Cheek)" - India/Sri Lanka, "The Great Match" - Mongolia/Niger/Brazil, "Buddy" - Norway Enoteca Wine Bar Saketini Sunday, 3:00 pm [DRINK]

Riley's Bar and Grill Cutting Edge Production presents DJ Tray, FREE

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Corvallis

Odd Fellow’s Hall Swing dance with Syncopated Rhythms, 8:00 pm, $5, ALL AGES Peacock Bar and Grill On the Top: DJ Big Cheese, 9:00 pm FREE

Corvallis

sing

Merlin’s Bar & Grill Karaoke

Merlin’s Bar & Grill No Way Out, 9:00 pm [CLASSIC ROCK]

Duffy’s Irish Pub Karaoke, 10:00 pm, FREE Merlin’s Bar & Grill Karaoke

live music

Albany

Calapooia Brewing Space Neighbors, 8:00 pm [SPACE FUNK]

Lebanon

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sunday

monday

stuff

Corvallis

Arts Center Between the Cracks: Hans Fjellstad, 7:00 pm, $10 [SERIES] Avalon Wine Wine tasting, noon [WINE] Corvallis Country Club Open House, 4:00 pm, FREE [PARTY] First Alternative South Mindful Eating, 3:00 pm [LEARN] Enoteca Wine Bar Saketini Saturday, 3:00 pm [DRINK]

Fireworks Southtown Talent Search: Open Mic, 8:00 pm Novak's Hungarian Restaurant Strings of Time, 6:00 pm, FREE [FOLK]

Lebanon

Merlin's Bar and Grill Karaoke, FREE [SING]

Contributed Photo

Calapooia Brewing

Space Neighbors, Saturday, 8:00 pm [SPACE FUNK] 10

FEBRUARY 15-FEBRUARY 21, 2011

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ALCHEMIST WEEKLY• WWW.THEALCHEMISTWEEKLY.COM


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Endwise Across 1. Like an eagle’s wingspan 5. Whisky vessel 9. One with flow, hopefully 14. Hi-res film format 15. Mˆtley ___ 16. Barnyard sustenance sources 17. Hipster gas station attendant’s shtick? 19. No problem 20. Salt name 21. Keep a beat after spinning around a bunch of times? 23. Maxis avatar 25. Human cousin 26. They’re generally caught at night 27. Attacks 31. Chinese general who fought in the sugary-chicken-cube-and-white-rice wars of the 19th century 33. British music rag 34. Ask Jeeves after a night at the bar? 40. Blue-footed bird 42. About the author section, e.g. 43. Not chronic 44. Bit of beefcake at the rodeo? 47. Easygoing, in slang 48. As 49. They’re planned for the classroom 51. Spanish singles 54. Language spoken in Vien-

tiane 57. It’s about 907,000 grams 58. Dried Coke? 61. Keep from flying, in a way 65. Invest (with) 66. Malt liquor made with bark? 68. Volleyball star Gabrielle 69. Grains in some meal 70. It begins working when fired 71. Throat ailment 72. Doctor’s office suffix 73. Without effort Down 1. Use a moist towelette, say 2. “Time to bat!” 3. River blockers 4. Revealing magazine spread? 5. “Down on the Corner” band, to fans 6. Yankee infield nickname 7. Jazz musician from either Saturn or Alabama, depending on whom you believe 8. Get psyched 9. Footnote abbr. 10. Era with a big extinction 11. Dugout, e.g. 12. Tour de France stage 13. Awards show with a Best Sports Movie category 18. Long-distance sentiment 22. “Winter’s Bone” drug 24. Fannie ___ 27. “Power Lunch” channel

Inkwell Crosswords by Ben Tausig 28. “___: A Narrative of the South Seas” 29. Kitten onomatopoeia 30. Long-distance runner Ron once married to long-distance runner Mary Decker 32. Doesn’t partake of anymore 35. Brazilian port 36. In 37. Mario who wrote “The Godfather” 38. WWII submachine gun 39. Hankerings 41. Flavoring with regional variations across the U.S. 45. University Emma Watson turned down in favor of Brown 46. February holiday in Hanoi 50. Reality star Polizzi who wrote “A Shore Thing” 51. Rehab population 52. Sextet plus three 53. More perplexing 55. “Star Wars” droid 56. Gumbo pods 59. Vehicle originally manufactured for the military 60. Himalayan legend 62. Crossword puzzle, e.g. 63. “___ cost you!” 64. Line on a letter to Mayor Bloomberg 67. Mountain road feature

Contributed Photo

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www.sudoku-puzzles.net

8 Difficulty: Medium

To be considered for a calendar listings, notice of events must be received in writing by noon on Tuesday, two weeks before publication. Send to editor@ thealchemistweekly.com. Photographs should be clearly labeled and will be returned if accompanied by a self addressed, stamped envelope.

v

Bombs Away Cafe

yoYa with Greenhorse, Saturday, 10:00 pm, FREE [ROCK] WWW.THEALCHEMISTWEEKLY.COM

• THE

ALCHEMIST WEEKLY• FEBRUARY 15-FEBRUARY 21, 2011

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O ' P I Npints ING

The Flavour of Enlightenment

Writers Wanted

S

submissions@ thealchemistweekly.com

12

FEBRUARY 15-FEBRUARY 21, 2011

• THE

ixteen months before I was born, Thich Quang Duc walked out onto a busy intersection of Saigon, sat down in front of bustling traffic, and tilted a can of gas over his head. Sufficiently doused, he torched a match, and lit himself to death. Thich has not been the only monk to do this irreversible act of defiance/point making. It was Vietnam, and seven monks self-immolated themselves in protest of the Catholic Church and government restrictions on their religion. For a population that practices non-violence, it is a pretty serious act to torch yourself for all the world to see. It would also not be the type of act wherein the torch-ee would spontaneously commit. Some serious thought and inner reflection would have to happen first. It’s not like, ‘Good morning, Sweetie, big day at the temple ahead of you?’ ‘Yeah, yoga at nine and a tea ceremony at eleven. I’m having lunch with the Dalai Lama and after meditation I’ll be selfimmolating, so please don’t stay up, as I’ll be late getting home!’ These monks pretty much had their backs up against a wall and had contemplated the act for quite a spell. So, the eternal question remains, what alcoholic beverage would have been wet on the lips right at the point of obliteration? Yes, I know, Buddhist monks don’t partake, but if they did… Some sort of distilled spirit such as rum, bourbon or tequila, with their heat close to the flash point of petrol, could make sense as the last alcoholic beverage to drink before torching off. You know, get that inner fire really stoked. Personally, I’d enjoy a contemplative glass of wine to perhaps slow me down and reason me out of this mess. There could be some bad wine choices like a Chateauneuf du Pape (an appellation in France named after the Pope’s vacation home—the whole reason for Thich lighting off in the first place is because of the Pope!) California Chardonnay would be about last on my wine

list; talk about an anti-climatic finish! And now, with these big buttery flavors and hints of oak barrel across my palate, I torch thee into oblivion! Sake makes a whole lotta sense; with all the rice vegetarians eat. Another topic along this subject would be “the last dinner,” of which I’ll touch on briefly for the point. My last bite would be a flame-broiled tube steak, unless I was vegetarian, which most Buddhist monks are, so a tube steak and a nice glass of Junmai Daiginjo most likely ain’t gonna be a match made in heaven. Sake names are pretty poetic and I’d like to think that there would be one called “Cool Heat” or “Eternal Flame.” I am a beer guy and so ultimately my preference for a pre-funk torching beverage would be Imperial India Pale Ale. The bitterness of the hops would soften the bitterness in my heart while the big malt back bone would help to keep my back stiff and straight while mustering the effort to flick my Bic. This past Monday,Team CBS had lunch with Dave Marliave, Flat Tail brewer, and we were afforded a sample of a soon to be released IIPA - Licentious Goat. Dave brewed this beer using only base malts and a small portion of cane sugar to help dry the finish of the beer. Along with an obscene amount of Chinook, Amarillo and Zeus hops, Dave used two non-traditional herbs, Damiana and Horny Goat Weed, for an added complexity to the bitterness with a wry hint of herbaceous sourness. Dave’s big 8.5% IIPA has an earthyoranginess that is somewhere between the color of fire and the reddish-orange robes monks wear. Capping the flavors and aromas, this beer Nirvana has a billowing white head of foam that immortalizes transcendence into Noble Truth. While this author and the staff of The Alchemist Weekly do not promote or encourage self-immolation, we do encourage quiet moments contemplating existence and how to become a better person while peering into the glass of beer. -Joel Rea (Corvallis Brewing Supply owner) , joel@lickspigot.com

ALCHEMIST WEEKLY• WWW.THEALCHEMISTWEEKLY.COM


Buddhism:

A coming of age story by STANLEY TOLLETT

W

hen I was kid, I remember my mother telling me that Patrick Duffy, ya know the guy from television shows like Dallas and Step by Step, was a Buddhist. I thought, Jesus... what the hell happened to that guy out there in Hollywood. Had he done some crazy drugs? Did he suffer a complete mental breakdown? Those were my rural southern Protestant theories on Buddhism as a child. Over the years, of course, I came to a more enlightened position. I read and studied, and in doing so, gained a broader perspective on life, religion and philosophy. In fact, I consider myself a Buddhist/Taoist. Sorry, Jesus. Just in case you exist, please don’t send me to hell for that. When I began this story, I thought I knew about Buddhism. I have a book sitting on one of my speakers called Meditation for Dummies. I took an iPhone picture of an artist’s rendering of Krishna, which I now know isn’t Buddhist at all, on a calendar at my acupuncturist’s office. I overcame my fear of death and thank trees for it. But as it turns out, I didn’t know shit. When this dawned on me. I began to panic. I remembered some of the meditation practices of focusing on my breathing. I invite you to do the same. Breathe in and out, in and out. Focus on your breath and your breath alone. I am not my feelings. I am not the panic of deadlines and quality. I just...am. Okay, now that you and I are centered, let’s begin. It’s seems like Buddhism is attractive to many people these days because at its core it is about understanding that suffering is inherent in life. Everyone experiences some form of suffering at some point, and coming to terms with that can be extremely difficult. It was hard, for even the Buddha himself. According to Buddhist tradition, the young Buddha grew up in a very privileged and sheltered existence. One day he left the confines of his father’s palace and through his excursions he became aware of suffering in the world, called “the four sights” in Buddhist literature. This led him on a spiritual journey, shunning the trappings of wealth and materialism to go out into the world to seek a higher enlightenment and an end to suffering. He experimented with many ways in which to alleviate suffering. He eventually found the “Middle Way” between indulgence and mortification. Which led him to the Bodhi tree where he meditated and reflected on all that had happened and ultimately reached enlightenment. Bam...Buddhism.

The story of Buddha sounds to me a lot like what I have experienced in life, and what many, many of my friends have experienced; exploration of different ways to alleviate suffering. Unsatisfied with where their lives have been or where t h e y are headed, y o u t h and adults alike seem to be searching for something to fill a void. Linda Sebring has been studying Buddhism since she read a book in 1979 called The Tao of Physics. This began an over thirty-year journey into Buddhism and brought about a profound change in the course of her life. It has become her personal spiritual philosophy. In fact, she sees Buddhism as more of a philosophy than a religion, and it’s one she uses everyday. “I feel much more prepared to deal with, as some great writer said, ‘the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune.’ You know, whatever comes my way I can apply the Buddhist principals and philosophies that I’ve learned, and it helps me feel less of a sense of impending doom,” Sebring said. “It’s made me be more prepared, I feel that I have the tools that I need to talk to myself to get myself through whatever trials I have.” The parallels between American youth and the young Buddha are something that Sebring has contemplated before and researched. “The youth of America, on the world scale, are extremely privileged. If you look over the entire history of human beings there has hardly ever been a time that human beings weren’t spending all of their time and energy getting their food and water and their daily needs, and in fact many people on this planet spend their entire lives, nose to the grindstone, just doing that,” Sebring continued. “Americans and other developed countries...and youth in particular, their inheritance is wealth and leisure time. They have the leisure to look into the realm of the intangible. They have the impetus to try to find a deeper meaning or to try and find out some piece of mind. Just because you have money and just because you have power doesn’t mean you’re going to have piece of mind. The search for a peaceful heart, a peaceful mind, a sense of well being, satisfaction with your own self and your life... all those intangibles and searching for that outside of yourself is what people are doing. [They are] searching for numbing. The self

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medication going on is what people are doing, the pit that is inside of themselves.” She believes that people often overlook a simple tenant of her training, the idea of being kind to one’s self. People are hard on themselves in the attempt to fill that pit. Sebring believes that being kind to oneself and paying attention to their own well-being is as important, if not more, than being kind to others. This resounds personally for me because while I try to always act in compassion for others, I am often very critical of myself. I have seen self-neglect lead friends of mind down extremely destructive paths. The value of teachers is another thing that Sebring thinks is important and in a dismal state in America. She says that in Buddhism, teachers are revered and looked at with the utmost respect, something that isn’t common in our public education system and that leads youth to seek learning and guidance elsewhere. For Sebring, she does not wish to proselytize the philosophy of Buddhism to anyone. People will find it for themselves. One of those people that found it for themselves, and perhaps despite himself, is a man named Noah Levine. He wrote a memoir called Dharma Punx in 2003. It was brought to my attention and I read it as part of this story. Levine is the prototypical example of the American youth searching for meaning in a world where most everything is provided for them, yet void of any real substance. His dissatisfaction with this led him to rebel against society and the values of his parents. He found his rebellion in the music of punk rock, and in addiction to drugs and alcohol at a young age.

In t h e book, he describes it as a fight against the outside world, doing anything and everything to numb himself of the pain and suffering of a world with which he found himself at odds. This led him quickly into trouble with the law and eventually incarceration. While in juvenile hall, he was offered some meditation advice from his father, the renowned Buddhist writer Stephen Levine. This began a radical transformation in his life that led him across the globe, and in search of himself. Yet, even in this, he couldn’t seem to find the crux of what assailed him. Even though he had been sober and practicing Buddhism and mediation for years it seemed as though he had not quite found what he was looking for. I don’t want to spoil it for you, because it is an incredible book...one very much worth reading, but in the end Levine came to understand that each individual must take the war against suffering to its ultimate battleground, the battleground within oneself. It seems that to him, and I am compelled to agree, that only here...within your own mind and heart, can one truly understand and come to terms with their own void, whatever that is. “It’s easy to hate and point out everything that is wrong with the world; it is the hardest and most important work in one’s life to free oneself from the bonds of fear and attachment. Compassion is our only hope, wisdom is our weapon, The inner revolution will not be televised or sold on the Internet. It must take place within one’s own mind and heart.” (Levine, Dharma Punx) Levine’s book and the writing of this story opened my eyes to many things. The foremost of which is my constant seeking of external means by which to fill my own void, without ever stopping to take a look within and discover just exactly what it is I am attempting to fill. Doing so takes tremendous courage and a steadfast willingness to open your eyes and your mind constantly, but it seems a worthwhile challenge and Buddhism the perfect vehicle for the journey. I encourage anyone reading this to do a little searching, inside your own mind, and then perhaps outside in your community. What you seek will most likely find you, but it feels right that you should take the first step alone.

ALCHEMIST WEEKLY• FEBRUARY 15-FEBRUARY 21, 2011

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Weekly

A

strologer

has the capacity to create this kind of chaos. Luckily, you have the antidote for the poison words. And you will grow, like the waxing moon.

by

Fe

Coyote Kate

bru

ar y 15,

1 201

Aquarius ( Jan. 20-Feb.18): “All my life I have tried to pluck a thistle and plant a flower wherever the flower would grow in thought and mind.” Old Abe’s astute words remain valid over 150 years later, Water Bearer. Which thought seeds will you plant? And with the unique fluidity of your mind, where will they grow? In six months, what fruition will you enjoy? Dig. Aries (March 21-April 19): What did Sleeping Beauty dream of for 100 years? A prince coming to seduce her? A century-long wet dream? Chiron, a planetary body orbiting between Saturn and Neptune, officially discovered in 1977, has moved into Pisces and will guide the world into an awareness much akin to other historical consciousness epochs. Bring Sleeping Beauty’s dreams alive, Aries. Taurus (April 20-May 20): To the pseudoeagle saga: Coyote soldiers are now among the force fending off the hoards of fowl seeking refuge and grass. These crouching guardians are a little disconcerting even though we know coyote is a trickster. Historically, other animals served the same purpose. Sentinels include gargoyles functioning as water spouts and protecting property. What and why they protect—ambiguous. Are they tricksters too? Bull, check your gatekeepers and what they guard.

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FEBRUARY 15-FEBRUARY 21, 2011

• THE

Leo ( July 23-Aug. 22): Situation: Two eagles perch in a crooked oak tree above a farm house. On the road below, 100’s of starlings squat in the road feasting on dropped grain, oblivious. Innocent lambs and chickens wander in an adjacent field. One of the eagles says: “I’m not shy. I’m just studying my prey.” Know what you eat, Leo. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Friedrich Nietzsche said, “Faith: not wanting to know what is true.” Chiron, now in Pisces for about seven years, renders his words undone. Truth exists, Virgo. The era of consensus reality spewed by the media is over. Since your exacting nature influences all, let truth shine like a black eye. Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Roadside tributes, more noticeable due to dormant grass, evoke a sense of loss, respect, and honor to those who died in those funerary spots. Death is everywhere. The Earth we stand upon harbors death and life in a never-ending cycle. These markers remind us of the different energy level. Libra, carry the honoring with you; balance it within your everyday life. Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Einstein summed up scientific method succinctly: “Insanity is doing the same thing, over and over again, but expecting different results.” As we move into another era, we once again question our collective path since we have conquered all there is to know. Conquer all there is to feel Scorpio. Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): We’ve forgotten how to walk with one another. On the sidewalk we walk alone in a straight line, or in pairs or groups. If we walk larger, we become a gang, school, church, parade, crowd, throng, or mass. What is the largest group you gather with Sag? Do you actually walk with them, in front of them, or behind? Grab a hand.

Gemini (May 21-June 20): When my tribe meets your tribe in our town and we greet you and say hello, and try to engage you in conversation, please understand that we love you. We want to know how you are and who you are. We hope that you will feel better for the energy that was shared. Gemini, open all your hearts. A country has to have a people.

Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Chiropractic, a type of holistic healing, developed in 1895 by D.D. Palmer, was named after Chiron, the god of medicine. Translating from Greek as ‘one who has hands,’ this ‘alternative’ medicine involves technique. Goat, you can read your brain cells out, but until you practice life with healing techniques, you’ll be cuffed.

Cancer ( June 21-July 22): Snow-eaters aka foehn or Chinook winds (popularly known as false spring) appear this time of year. Accompanied by fog, they have the capacity within a few hours or weeks to create hurricane force winds, melt deep snow, change the temperature 80 degrees, and then cause temperatures to plummet. The dialogue surrounding you

Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20): Happy birthday, Pisces. Chiron moves into your sign like a tsunami. Don’t panic. Atop the waves, ride much needed change and awareness. Your Pisces peers may have already inherently felt the movement. You are used to standing in the wave, moving with the flow, rolling with the tides. Your role is to teach others to swim in this new spiritual and emotional awareness.

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Corvallis

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1030 S.W. Third St. 541.757.2727

Downward Dog

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Sales • Service • Rentals

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Artisian’s Well Lounge

136 SW Washington Ave. 541.758.9095

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916 Old Salem Rd NE 541.926.3111

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Murphy’s Tavern

Thank you for naming us your Favorite Musical Instrument Store!

76 E. Sherman St. 541.451.2027 1250 Grant St. 541.259.0800

Philomath

High 5 Sports Bar & Grill 1644 Main St.-541.929.7529

Meet’n Place Tavern

1150 Mian St. 541.929.3130

Wine Vault

1301 Main St. 541.929.8496

Wing Sing Restaurant & Lounge 658 Main St. 541.929.6255

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ALCHEMIST WEEKLY• FEBRUARY 15-FEBRUARY 21, 2011

15


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