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table of CONTENTS Sept/Oct 2016
www.The863Magazine.com
4 Editor + Publisher Letter
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Apropos of Nothing
For the Love of Horses
Traveling with the family. Projectiles are projected and memories are made. Good times.
Retired educator Kathy Grinstead teaches life lessons at Rockin’ W Ranch.
By Jamie Beckett
By Donna Kelly
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Finding Peace
HHM: Mark Cover: Soccer Your Calendar Pro Alex Morrell
That to-do list has seen better days. Self-imposed tasks that don’t matter melt away with one simple activity.
The 2nd Annual Haven Holiday Market is happening November 12 in downtown Winter Haven. See photos from last year!
By Jai Maa
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Lakeland native Alex Morrell has reached many goals in his life, including playing professional soccer for the Chicago Fire.
By Meredith Jean Morris
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Photo Winners
Non-Profit Spotlight
Explore the 863
Winner, winner, chicken dinner! Come see who won the annual photo contest!
Michelle’s Closet: Providing resources to those struggling with addiction.
What’s going on in the 863 in September and October.
www.The863Magazine.com
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e all have things we want, be it more money, a better job or relationship situation, peace, prosperity, improved this or that—basically security or an accomplishment of some sort. And creating goals is a way to get those things. Holding those things, whatever they may be, in your mind’s eye helps to manifest what you want—making those ideas become real. Eyes on the prize, as they say. One young man who had his eyes on the prize was making goals—literally—on the soccer field since he was 3. Hard work, persistence, and maybe a few strokes of luck all led Lakelander Alex Morrell to become a professional soccer player for the Chicago Fire. Read how a local made it big beginning page 12. Hopefully the horses on the Rockin’ W Ranch in Bartow aren’t kicking their way to any
goals, but rather helping their caretakers—often children—learn things about life in a round about way. Ranch owner Kathy Grinstead is a retired educator who hasn’t quite retired from her teaching gig. Find out the ways a ranch, some horses, and a lover of horses have made for good life lessons on page 8. Life lessons is a goal of our writer, Jai Maa, helping people reach “aha” moments. And her own struggles are often good for others to learn from. Learn how she found her way to peace through chaos on page 9. The 863’s annual summer photo winners are on page 14, chosen by the number of likes that Facebook users gave them. A big thank you to all who participated and to the prize sponsors. Our Non-profit spotlight is Michelle’s Closet, helping those struggling with addiction. —Happy fall y’all!
Publisher | SERGIO CRUZ Editor | ANDREA CRUZ
Contributors JAMIE BECKETT SERGIO CRUZ DONNA KELLY JAI MAA MEREDITH JEAN MORRIS
Editor + Publisher LETTER
863
Cover Designer | DEBORAH COKER Ad Sales Rep | SERGIO CRUZ Sergio@The863Magazine.com 863-258-3561
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Sergio Cruz, publisher Andrea Cruz, editor Sergio@The863Magazine.com Andrea@The863Magazine.com
Cover Photo It isn’t often that a local makes it to the big time. But Lakelander Alex Morrell has played his whole life to become a professional soccer player for the Chicago Fire. Story page 12. Photo provided to The 863 Magazine. The 863 Magazine is independently owned and produced in Winter Haven, Florida. For more info visit us online: www.The863Magazine.com.
APROPOS of Nothing An Editorial by Jamie Beckett
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t’s been said that travel broadens the mind. That’s true. Experiencing life outside the cocoon of your own normal existence can give you insight into other cultures and customs. It can provide the thrill of grand vistas that are totally foreign to you. Although if you’re not careful, travel can also introduce you to a slew of ugly biological lifeforms that will compel you to spend an entire vacation in the bathroom of your very expensive hotel room. Travel is not for the weak. Anyone who has ever voyaged beyond the county line with children in tow can tell you that. There will be screaming that leads to fighting. Food will be thrown. Drinks will be spilled. Personal space will be violated with glee. Then the retaliation begins. Somehow, and science is completely in the dark as to how this happens, the cutest, cuddliest little girls can be transformed into raging monsters with an uncomfortable resemblance to the Crypt Keeper by merely putting them in the back seat and motoring
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off to grandma’s house for a surprise visit. Sure, you can try to prepare in an effort to forestall the conniption fit that’s headed your way. But your best attempts at placating the she-beast in the back seat will fail. I know. I’ve tried. If you’ve got boys in your family, that’s a different thing entirely. The male of the species is suspect even under the best of circumstances, and shouldn’t be trusted within arms reach of any other living human until they attain the age of 45, at least. For boys the boredom of travel can be extremely dangerous. Fellow travelers be warned. Toys become projectiles. Books become projectiles. Corn dogs, french fries, SpongeBob SquarePants action figures, and even little sisters can be transformed into weapons or targets in the blink of an eye. No matter which way the scenario goes, it’s not going to be good. Fortunately for parents, time is the great cure-all for family travel adventures. Not so much because your children will become better behaved of more respectful. That’s never going to happen. Put the thought out of your mind. Time benefits parents simply because at some point, usually by the age of 12 or so, your children look mature enough that inexperienced outsiders assume they can be left to their own devices for short periods of time. This is the break you’ve been looking for. Finally, after years of pain and suffering, you can ignore your children in public for hours at a time with only a minimal risk of government intervention. Even federal agents are aware of what it’s like to travel with teenagers. Whatever their behavior, unless
there are open flames or visible blood spatter, most federal agents will just give you a nod and a wink as they let you go on your way. They’ve got kids. They know the deal. Surprisingly enough, in recent years family travel has become a real joy for me. I wouldn’t have believed that was even possible in the old days when I was weighed down with diaper bags, insulated snack sacks, a cooler full of drinks, multiple changes of clothes for each kid, and a first-aid kit that would be the envy of many emergency room administrators. Now, my kids are independent, more or less. More, in the sense that they live in a dwelling other than mine, most of the time. Less, in the sense that they still ask me for money on a fairly regular basis. What I find so wonderful about our recent travel arrangements is this; we commute separately. Our most recent outing to New York City is a prime example. It was time to go meet the new grandchild, and everyone was understandably excited. Those feelings of joyousness were preserved family-wide as my daughters jetted off to our destination two days before I did, and my wife flew out of a different airport than my daughters did, a day after I’d departed. Me? I chose to settle into a comfy, private room on a slow moving train all by myself. At the other end of the line, we all gathered together, had a few family style meals in outdoor settings where things couldn’t get too far out of hand, and ultimately headed home via separate methods of travel. I think I’m in heaven. Finally, I can go on vacation without the annoyance of my family being underfoot all the time. Whew! If only I’d known this 25 years ago, I might have left the house more often.
Jamie Beckett appears to be an average, everyday guy who just happens to hail from Arizona, Connecticut, New York City, and Central Florida. He wears many hats — pilot, mechanic, writer, politician, musician, stay-at-home dad — often an odd combination of all those things. Frankly, we don’t care. At The 863 Magazine we just keep him around because we think he’s funny. That’s that. www.JamieBeckett.com
For the Love of Horses: Life Lessons on the Ranch By Donna Kelly
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t the junction of Highway 60 and Rifle Range Road, a long narrow dirt road slices through pastureland and leads to Rockin’ W Ranch, an oasis bordered by moss laden oak trees where owner Kathy Grinstead and her menagerie impart life lessons while teaching riding skills. In addition to Grinstead, the 12acre ranch is home to eight horses, three miniature horses, two donkeys, as well as a pair each of dogs, cats, and birds. Miracles take place here as students of all ages learn the basics of caring for, riding, and showing horses. Stressed businessmen leave work at the office and relax while grooming horses or mucking out a stall. Autistic children find an outlet for frustration and new methods of communication. Teachers decompress after
a week or year in the classroom. Children and teenagers learn to accept responsibility, to show respect, to develop confidence and self reliance. An 80-year-old man stays young by exercising his brain, limbs, and heart. Mothers and fathers spend family time with their children. “We care about (students) as much as we care about our horses and because of that we try to keep them safe and educate them not only about riding but also about horse care and ownership,” says Grinstead.
A Life-long Love
“I was crazy about horses from the time I knew what one was,” says Grinstead, 66, who grew up on a hill farm in West Virginia. “We moved to the farm when I was 9 and we got a pony shortly afterwards.” The industrious youngster worked hard – selling eggs, cleaning chicken houses, cutting weeds, raising pigs – to earn money to buy her own horse. Below: Joker, one of the horses at Rockin’ W Ranch, is a 20-year-old She purchased Lucki Tennessee Walking / Draft cross. Photo by Sergio Cruz of The 863 Magazine. Ladi when she was 13. “I still have one of her grandsons, a greatgreat granddaughter, and a great-great-great grandson,” she says. “I hope she’ll always be with me one way or another.” As Grinstead grew up, she also developed a passion for music and a desire to pass it on to children. She graduated from Marshall University in Huntington, WV with a master’s degree in music education and later added a certification for gifted education from the University of South Florida. “I was fortunate enough to get to share my passion for music with young people and to help them develop their musical talents and abilities,” she says. “Several exceptional students went on to major in music and are now teaching the next
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Kathy Grinstead owns the Rockin’ W Ranch in Bartow. She trains horses, gives riding lessons and life lessons. Photo provided to The 863 Magazine.
generation. What an honor to have passed on the baton!” After a 30-year teaching career, Grinstead retired from Lake Region High School in 2012. But she isn’t done teaching. “When you teach for 30 years, it becomes part of who you are and what you do,” she says. “I’m still teaching – the subject just changed.”
A Teacher at Heart
Grinstead purchased the ranch in 1986 and began offering riding lessons in 1992. She taught both music in public school and horseback riding at the ranch from 1992 until 2012. “It’s only been since I retired from public school teaching that I have only been teaching horseback riding,” she explains. The Rockin’ W offers riding lessons, leases, boarding, pony parties, trail rides, activity days, gymkhanas – games on horseback – and a newly formed 4-H Club led by Winter Haven resident Beth Kingham. Grinstead says working with horses teaches valuable lessons for all members of the family. Children and teenagers will develop the following positive character traits like responsibility, patience, discipline, empathy, compassion, self control, and dedication Problem solving and quick decision making skills, as well as confidence, self-esteem, and socialization skills are develeped. And the tools for handling competition, a possible future career, and of course opportunities to have fun are gained in addition.
Continued on page 15
Break THROUGH Your Threshold “Finding Peace in Chaos” By Jai Maa
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used to be a workaholic. I was that person who stayed caffeinated from sunup to sundown working really, really hard, but felt like I never got anything done. I ran a healing center, sat on the board of directors of a personal development institute, and produced art events which raised thousands of dollars for charities. My to-do list was unending, and just as I would get one thing done, ten more items would show up on my list. The idea of taking time for myself was a joke. Marianne Williamson, author of Everyday Grace, suggested to “Begin your day in silent meditation for just five minutes and your life is guaranteed to dramatically change for the better.” Just five minutes? I could do that. I resisted the urge to open up my laptop one morning and went to the living room to just, well, just sit there. This was the most agonizing five minutes of my life. I squirmed in my chair like an antsy
5-year-old on timeout, staring at the clock and tapping my foot as I watched the minutes click by painfully slow. I felt like I was in a torture chamber. When those awful five minutes were finally up, I ran to my laptop to check my email. I could have missed something important during that time I wasted doing nothing. Determined to experience some kind
My to-do list was loaded with things that did not really matter.
of result, I started the next day quietly for five minutes. It was just as painful. I tried it again the following day. Still unbearable. I would just stare at the clock and feel worthless for not doing anything productive with my time. Then I asked myself a question that changed my life, “Why is it so painful to be with myself and do nothing?” One afternoon, I heard the voice of the Divine call me from my living room, “Come sit with Me until you would rather be nowhere else.” With my eyes bugging from my head at what I just heard, I grabbed my coffee and sat down on my sofa. I sat, and sat, and sat, and wanted to leave. I finally surrendered, closed my eyes, and went within. There was a tornado of emotional disturbance
thrashing around inside of me. I felt pain, sadness, misery, anguish, despair… I wept for hours, uncertain of what I was crying about. Then, a peace fell upon me like I have never experienced before. I didn’t want to be anywhere else or do anything else. When I got up to do some work, I looked down at my to-do list and laughed. Who created this mania??? My to-do list was loaded with things that did not really matter. I decided to do the things I felt were important, and I let go of everything else. Knowing I had discovered something special, I started all of my days in quiet meditation and prayer. Fifteen minutes soon turned into an hour, and then I reached a point where I was consistently meditating for four hours every day. The most miraculous thing happened: I accomplished ten times more in a day working a fraction of the time! How was this happening? This was not making logical sense, and I didn’t need it to. I felt nourished and at peace, and my life became inconceivably better. Begin your day connecting with peace, and see if your life doesn’t miraculously do the same. Enlightenment Challenge: Begin everyday quietly with yourself for five minutes. Notice your experience. Try sitting with yourself and your Divine until you want to be nowhere else. Do not give up before the miracle happens.
Jai Maa is a touring author and enlightenment facilitator who inspires others to create their visions with no compromise. An interfaith minister and native of Polk County, she travels with her cat companions teaching others how to co-create with God and live their own version of Heaven on Earth. Jai Maa is a regular instructor at THE SELF Center in Winter Haven. For more info visit BreakThroughYourThreshold.com.
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Second Annual Haven Holiday Market Here are a few photos from the first Haven Holiday Market. Great fun, food, and shopping!
PROJECT L VE Donations for Project Love will be accepted at Haven Holiday Market. The mission of Project Love is to operate a resource center that will share God’s love and minister to the spiritual and everyday living needs of the people in the Eloise community. Motto: Sharing God’s Love, Loving God’s People Top needs: --Food (cereal, rice, pasta and sauce, staples, canned meat, fruits, veggies and soup) --Children and teen clothing and shoes --Household cleaning supplies --Toiletry items (shampoo, soap, toothbrush and paste, deodorant, combs, etc) --Small appliances (toaster, microwave, blender, etc) --Financial donations
Free Community Event!
-Larry Powell Project Love of Eloise.
More info on back cover!
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Save the Date: Nov. 12 in Downtown Winter Haven
Chat and Chew: Food for Thought
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rocery store tours, cooking classes, restaurant events, email newsletters, Facebook and gardening classes are just a few of the ways that Chat and Chew meeting attendees “study” proper nutrition. With the help and guidance of members anchored in the expert advice of “giants,” each participant designs strategies that work for their personal health goals through diet. The subject matter of each meeting varies. “What’s on a healthy dinner plate?” is a frequent focus of the study group meetings. What do the experts recommend we eat to build health? How do you cook kale? Why would I want to eat the mystery grain called quinoa - and how do you even say that word?, What is the latest research on Alzheimer’s? These and other topics are discussed as
participants learn of diet changes to avoid the chronic diseases of heart disease, stroke, cancer, Alzheimer’s, diabetes, high blood pressure, etc. This year will be packed with many of the same types of events, along with new Skype speakers and a live speaker for March - the “Plant Based Pharmacist” from Florida Hospital. Coming up soon... What: Chat and Chew is turning 5 years old. The health study group will kick off its season of meetings on October 13 at the Winter Haven library with a chat with Dr. Colin Campbell, the father of nutrition, over Skype. Dr. Campbell researched the connections between diet and cancer and has just returned from a speaking tour in Europe where he addressed the European Union Parliament. His daughter, Dr. LeAnne Campbell, will also be live during the Skype session from her Cooking Summit in North Carolina. This free event is an opportunity to hear Dr. Campbell and ask questions of both Dr. Campbell and LeAnne about cancer research and cooking.
Space limited, arrive early to get a seat before the doors are closed. When: October 13, 12 noon - 2 p.m. Where: Winter Haven Library, 325 Avenue A NW, Winter Haven More info: 54321health@gmail.com.
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Alex Morrell: Living the DREAM By Meredith Jean Morris
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ike many young boys, Lakeland native Alex Morrell grew up playing soccer. “I started when I was 3 or 4 years old, and then joined a competitive league when I was 10 or 12,” he says. “I started to realize I was better at soccer than at any other sports.” It was also around that time that the 22-year-old says he began to dream of playing professional soccer one day. “He wanted to play pro soccer when he was a little kid,” says Alex’s father, Gonzalo Morrell. “Now, he gets to play against some of his childhood stars.” Alex Morrell is currently living his childhood dream; he was drafted as an outside midfielder by the Chicago Fire
Lakeland native Alex Morrell, 22, plays professional soccer for the Chicago Fire. His position is outside midfielder. Photos provided to The 863 Magazine.
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Major League Soccer team in January 2016. “That was the most exciting moment so far,” says Morrell of his MLS career, “definitely the draft, hearing my name called out. I think about how I made it, how I’m out here with these great players.” Morrell’s journey to the MLS has been one filled with hard work and dedication. “I started playing when I was younger in a rec league at Carter Road, competitively with the Lakeland Lasers,” he says. “Here in Polk County, it was a lot of fun to be playing with friends.” However, when Morrell’s coaches saw his potential, he says he was encouraged to move on to a more competitive level. “The coaches I had pushed me and helped me to get to the next level,” he says. Soon, he was traveling to St. Professional soccer player Alex Morrell started playing soccer at age 3 or 4 and now plays against some of his childPetersburg to play with Strictly Soccer hood soccer heroes. Photo provided to The 863 Magazine. F.C. to up and give me the whole talk about “In the league, we got into a lot of tournaments,” Morrell says. “There everyone transitioning to a professional team,” he says. was more experienced, and it was more The discussion turned out to be more serious.” than just talk. While at UNF, Morrell says The experience Morrell gained at he had the right combination of coaching Strictly Soccer F.C. helped him during his and opportunities to see a professional high school years, as well. career in his future. “I played for George Jenkins High “Being under [UNF coaches] Derek School, and we made the district finals,” [Marinatos] and Josh [Dunn], taught me he says. “The last year was our best year, about playing the game,” he says. “They but we had a fifth-year senior on the helped me go from a stupid freshman kid team, so we weren’t eligible to advance.” to being someone who could play for a Despite the team’s ineligibility during summer MLS team.” his senior year, Morrell says that playing UNF Head Coach Derek Marinatos in high school was a lot of fun, and it was during those years that his future says the changes he saw in Morrell during his college career were impressive. with soccer began to take shape. “Alex came to us and immediately “I always wanted to play we could tell he had something special,” professionally, and at that Marinatos says. “He had a gift. With or point, I started to focus without the ball he is fast. He came to us a on getting into skinny boy and left a man.” college and However, it wasn’t just playing Morrell’s physical aspects that Marinatos thinks there,” he helped to propel him into says. the pros. While several college “Mentally, he is one of coaches came to see Morrell those kids who is fearless,” he says. “The play, ultimately, it was the University biggest team in the world could come at of North Florida in Jacksonville that won him but he wouldn’t be afraid. There was a him over. “They were the first ones to come See “Soccer” on page 17.
Above: Alex Morrell of the Chicago Fire greets fans, and (below) goes up against Donny Toia of the Montreal Impact. Photos provided to The 863 Magazine.
863 Summer Photo Contest Winners Congratulations to all the winners of the The 863 Magazine’s 2016 Summer Vacay Photo Contest! Thank you to all the prize sponsors! This year the photos were posted on The 863’s Facebook page for exactly two weeks and the winners were determined by the number of “likes” on each photo. Some entrants wrote their own captions and those are included here where applicable.
Above: Our granddaughter, Tori, sky driving in Alabama, Sunshine Areo Air Port, Paxton, AL. in June 2016. Submitted by Rebecca Jane Morgan.
Above: Jill Monday at Tampa, Florida’s Hard Rock Casino and Hotel. In the background are I-4 and the Midflorida Credit Union Amphitheater. Submitted by Jill Monday.
Above: Riley Richards on the Great Wall of China. Submitted by Riley Richards.
Watch for the announcement of The 863’s annual photo contest in the May/June issue of 2017! Touring author and teacher from Polk County, Jai Maa, followed the yellow brick road to the cornfields of Kansas for her third national book tour. Jai Maa is currently facilitating enlightenment at the barn of The Light Center where this photo was taken. Stranger things have happened... Submitted by Jai Maa.
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See all the 2016 entrants at The863Magazine.com and also at Facebook.com/The863Magazine
Alexia Flores shows off her copy of The 863 Magazine in Breckenridge, Colorado in June. It’s a ski resort but she didn’t ski. Hahaha. Submitted by Alexia Flores.
Horse ranch, continued from pg. 8
“For adults, horseback riding is considered a moderate intensity exercise; it develops core strength, balance, coordination, better posture, muscle tone, and flexibility. A great change from going to the gym,” says Grinstead. “Add to that relaxation, getting out in nature, stress relief, the companionship and partnership of working with a horse and other people who also enjoy the sport, and do I dare say it again, having fun.” Kissimmee-based equine instructor Elly Sager met Grinstead 15 years ago through a mutual student. She’s been teaching part-time at the ranch ever since. “She has the best program I’ve ever seen and I’m not easily impressed,” says Sager, who has taught riding at a private school in New Jersey and several other stables. “I love working with her kids because they have all of the basic knowledge.” Sager describes Grinstead as consistent, honest, and knowledgeable.
Grinstead offers, says Sager, a very organized, progressive program that easily moves students from Point A to Point B, including horsemanship, care of horses, barn management, different disciplines, grooming. “I’ve worked with students who graduated from horse colleges who didn’t know as much as Kathy’s students,” says Sager, who teaches dressage and advanced jumping at the Rockin’ W Ranch.
Kingham’s family became a part of the Rockin’ W family when her daughter Ellie, now 13, began riding horses four years ago. “It’s a place where people can light their spark in life,” says Kingham. “Ellie had tried dance, soccer and swimming, but this one Continued on page 19
Donna Coquyt walks 10-year-old Boca, a gaited horse that was rescued. Coquyt is a horse massage therapist, and takes riding lessons at Rockin’ W Ranch. Photo by Sergio Cruz of The 863 Magazine.
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863 Readers’ ART: Robert Nichols
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he art of Winter Haven resident Robert “Bob” Nichols is not new to the publishing world. And that’s likely because he has an eye for beauty, and a knack of being in the right spot at the right time. An artist not to be labeled, Nichols dabbles in a little bit of everything. Here we feature some of his photography, paintings, and even a poem. Enjoy.
p
m The Swa Down In
sky ere in the Down wh ater w e meets th mysteries allowed up. and the sw y amp are ccasin la of the sw d mr. mo an r to ga Ole mr. e off into th in wait ne to slip for someo er, at shallow w do, ah oh yes d l, ting. just awai rious sou ways a cu There’s al s about at night, der er, who wan urky wat into da m and falls g in nk ri d someone
of dat old too much wine ry er b ck bla ah makes aunt Sar the washshed. d in eh b t ou , od stuff Pretty go yself. nny, m y sa I’d alking fu u silly, w Makes yo g off into some in p and step er at shallow w le deep ho again. be found never to is ce vi ad So my l be carefu swamp. the down in hols ~Bob Nic
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Send your art (poetry, photography, paintings, drawings, etc.) to Andrea@The863Magazine.com.
“The Sweetness of the Earth”
“A Bird of Old”
“The Other Woman”
Sunrise for Winter Haven.
Passion flower.
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On Lake Howard, several years ago.
Soccer, continued from pg. 12
Steven Mendoza of the NYC Footbal Club, left, vies for the ball with Lakelander Alex Morrell of Chicago Fire. Photo provided to The 863 Magazine.
situation where we were playing a pro team and he would take on any of the players. He never doubted himself.” Morrell was the first men’s soccer player from UNF to be drafted to a professional soccer team, Marinatos says. “He was the first pro from our program, and while he was here, he helped us to build some great teams,” he says. “We’re proud of him.” Morrell got his first taste of
professional soccer while in college, spending a summer practicing with the Philadelphia Union, he says. That experience helped prepare him for the MLS Combine in early 2016, from which he was drafted by the Chicago Fire on January 14. “After the combine, I went home because I just wanted to hang out with my family,” Morrell says. “I knew it was my big chance, and then the Chicago Fire picked
me up. It was an amazing feeling.” Now, Morrell spends his days living his dream. “In a typical week, we practice every day, getting in around 9 a.m., hitting the gym, stretching, foam rolling, doing transition drills, then regular practice,” he says. “Afterwards, it’s an ice bath and eating. Sometimes we practice twice a day.” Whether at the professional level or playing in a rec league, Morrell says it can be easy to become overwhelmed by the practices and constant work, but he encourages serious players to stay focused on the journey. “You have to keep the love for the game,” Morrell says. “Continue to love it, continue to focus on the journey, that’s something you have to remind yourself of when you’re doing it all year ‘round. Also, make sure you’re thanking those people who support you along the way. You never realize what your parents are doing for you and the sacrifices they make.”
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Non-Profit SPOTLIGHT
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id you know that nearly one in 10 Americans suffer from addiction? Michelle’s Closet is dedicated to changing that number, if only by one. This is the mission of Janice Honiker, president of Michelle’s Closet, her non-profit named after her late daughter. Who is Michelle? Michelle was my daughter, a recovering addict who fought with addiction for more than seven years. It wasn’t until she found out that she was pregnant that she sought help. Ever since, Michelle fought an uphill battle with her sobriety. On April 25, 2015, she submitted to that struggle and accidentally took her own life. Our family was devastated. Michelle was more than just an addict; she was beautiful, talented, loving, and giving. But above all this, Michelle was an awesome mother. She left behind a beautiful 4-year-old son. After Michelle’s death, all I had were memories. One in particular was our first visit in rehab; I hadn’t seen her in months. I was so happy to see her that I didn’t even notice that her clothes were literally falling off of her. Michelle was a tiny girl and there was no clothing small enough to fit her in rehab. She had to roll the waist of her pants to keep them from falling down. She looked so pitiful, all we could do was laugh, but I knew deep down she was depressed and embarrassed. I started this foundation based on that memory (hence, Michelle’s Closet). I was determined that no girl, no matter
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their size, no matter their circumstance should have to feel that way. After all, those on the path to recovery are changing their lives for the better and they need appropriate clothing for meetings, job interviews, court appearances, church, etc. And when you look good, you feel good, and first impressions do make a difference. Michelle’s Closet gives recovering addicts the clothes they need to feel good about themselves and make that first impression a great impression. A simple
The late Michelle Honiker is the reason why Michelle’s Closet, an organization dedicated to providing clothing and other resources to those struggling with addiction, exists.
gesture that cost no more than simply cleaning out your closet could help change the life of someone in need. Our goal is to inspire those who struggle with addiction to continue their journey towards sobriety for just one more day; to never give in and never give up. My own goals are to keep the memory of my daughter alive for my grandson and to give the families of those who are struggling with addiction a little hope for just one more day; for every day an addict stays clean, their families have hope. Addiction is an ugly disease; it consumes everything and everyone close to the addict. Over time everyone loses. Let’s not lose another person to addiction. Let’s come together and make a difference.
How Michelle’s Closet is Making a Difference: •We collect and donate clothing and personal hygiene items for families in need. •We sponsor an annual book drive to purchase Narcotics Anonymous books for our local rehabs. •We collect and donate school supplies, clothing, and other needs for children of local recovering addicts. •We offer volunteer hours to our local high school kids towards graduation. •We sponsor an annual scholarship drive for our local colleges (last month we raised a $1,000 for Polk State). •We make and sell candles and other unique gift items that are “Lighting the Way to a Brighter Tomorrow.” We use this money to purchase items that are not donated. But above all this, we offer a place where recovering addicts can come to heal, feel accepted and participate in their own recovery; a place where they can find phone numbers, resources and the tools they need to succeed; a place where their past does not precede their future; and a place where they are motivated to give back to their community in a positive way. Michelle’s Closet is always accepting clothing and monetary donations. To make arrangements contact MichellesCloset413@ yahoo.com or make a monetary donation online at www.gofundme.com/ MichellesCloset. Purchase a candle or unique gift from Michelle’s Closet at www. Michellescloset413.com where 100% of proceeds benefit our cause. Show your support on Facebook/michellescloset413; Like us, share our posts, join our raffles Help us spread our message or just simply send a message asking how you can help. For more info contact 863-258-2266.
Tell Us
About a Non-Profit Sergio@The863Magazine.com
Horse ranch, continued from pg. 15
(horseback riding) took.” Now the entire family is riding at the ranch – Ellie, her two brothers, and their parents. “It’s a place our family can do something across the age span,” says Beth Kingham. “We’re all learning something new and it’s hard. You’re not only managing yourself, but the 1,200 pound horse beneath you.” Kingham says trips to the ranch have spurred other family activities. Riding and bathing the horses led to sitting down and watching the Olympic Games together. “It’s building family relationships,” she says. Mike and Beth Kingham homeschool their children and built their curriculum around barn activities. “We start the day dirty and sweating at the barn with these beautiful animals. It’s a beautiful, natural learning experience,” Beth Kingham says. “Everything with Kathy is a learning experience.” If it’s too rainy to ride, Grinstead improvises. “Sometimes we show up and it rained over night and it’s not appropriate for riding, so she takes the kids into the living room and they cut out pictures of animals – talk about breeds, coats, and make a chart,” says Kingham. Kingham says her family is learning about equine science, showmanship, and barn management. “There’s so much more to it than showing up for lessons. It teaches them the whole gamut of what it means to be responsible for animals,” she says. Part of Grinstead’s strength is her ability to work with people of different ages and skill sets. “My 15-year old has Down syndrome. He goes horseback riding once a week. Kathy can shift gears from one type of rider to another,” Kingham says. “To go from my daughter and son who are better riders than I am to my second son, Jackson, she just knows the power of being around a horse. She’s so eager for everyone to try it.” Kingham sees a correlation between her children’s experiences at the barn and their developing self-reliance and selfconfidence. She attributes this growth in part to Grinstead’s high expectations and instructions to keep working at a task even when it becomes difficult. “Kathy is the type of person you want
to mentor your children,” she says. Grinstead’s mentoring and the experiences provided at the ranch set Erica Curtis on her career path. The 19-year-old is majoring in equine business management at St. Andrew’s University in Laurinburg, N.C. Curtis was a high school sophomore when she met Grinstead at a 4-H Show. After discussing a horse project with Grinstead, the teenager began taking lessons at the Rockin’ W Ranch. The experience, says Curtis, not only taught her horsemanship, but life skills, too. “Training horses requires a lot of patience. They’re sort of like toddlers – they’re all silly and they all have their little quirks – so it teaches you to be patient when training them. It can help when you have kids one day,” she says. “When training horses you have to teach them to trust you and to respect you and that you’re the one in charge, so it can also give you leadership skills.” Curtis still relies on Grinstead for advice. “She’s a very dedicated trainer. I can call her up at any time of the day or night if I’m wondering about anything or trying to figure it out,” says Curtis. “She will get back to me right away. She’s very good at what she does – helping you understand things.”
The 4-H Connection: A Family Tradition
“I am a 4-H All Star and my mother was a 4-H leader for most of her life, so I am a major advocate of 4-H and its many benefits for young people,” Grinstead says. Although she has been involved with the 4-H horse program in Polk County for over two decades, this will be the first time a club has operated out of the Rockin’ W Barn. According to Kingham, whose three teenage children began riding at the Rockin’ W about four years ago, the 4-H experience is designed to be a family endeavor. “4-H likes to incorporate the entire family. It strengthens relationships,” she says. Although Kingham expects the club will consist of a number of Grinstead’s students, any children between 8 and 18 are welcome. Activities will include one official club meeting per month as well as a second monthly club activity.
Ellie Kingham, 13, holds on to Sally, her project horse. Ellie has been riding at Rockin’ W Ranch for four years and prefers horseback riding over soccer and swimming, according to her mother, Beth Kingham. Now, the entire family takes riding lessons. Photo by Sergio Cruz of The 863 Magazine.
“Kathy prepares students for the local 4-H shows. I love the spirit around our trailer. There’s such a sense of camaraderie,” says Kingham. The spirit begins at the barn. “There’s no competitiveness between people at the barn. They’re all cheering us on. There’s no drama, no divas at the barn,” says Kingham. Grinstead has two guiding philosophies in life. “Share your passion by teaching others about it. That’s what our junior instructor and summer camp program is all about,” she says. And then there’s her barn motto: Saddle your own horse. “Take charge of your life. Make it happen yourself. Don’t wait for others to do it for you,” she says. She lives it, too. For more information about programs at the Rockin’ W Ranch, contact Grinstead at luckiladi23@gmail.com.
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Explore | September & October HAPPENINGS Send Your Community Event to Andrea@The863Magazine.com.
F Sept. 1: Master Gardener Workshops The
Mackay Gardens and Lakeside Preserve Free Community Gardening Workshop hosted by Pat Farris and Debra Howell of the Polk County Master Gardeners. Free. No registration necessary. 10 a.m. - 12 p.m. Mackay Gardens, Lake Alfred. Info: 863-291-5275 or MyLakeAlfred.com. F Sept. 2: Downtown Lakeland’s First Friday “Dog Days Downtown” Dogfriendly activities, demonstrations, and giveaways. Bring social canines on a leash for water activities, product samples, treats, obedience training demonstrations, and more. Munn Park, Lakeland. 6 - 9 p.m. Info: 863-577-4608. F Sept. 3 & Oct. 1: Antiques, Arts & Oddities In Downtown Lake Wales near Walesbilt Hotel at 39 W Park Avenue. 7 a.m. – 12 noon every first Saturday of the month. Info: 352-446-8448. F Sept. 8 and Oct. 13: Thursday Squared Food Truck Rally Join us on the second Thursday of every month for this food truck rally, which features about 20 food trucks. Come hungry. See you in downtown Lakeland’s Munn Park, 100 N Kentucky Ave. 6-9 p.m. Info: LakelandChamber. com. F Sept. 10: Bok Tower Gardens Grand Opening Celebration & Community Day Ribbon cutting dedication for Hammock Hollow Children’s Garden & other new garden spaces. Ceremony begins at 10 a.m. A full schedule of special activities, garden tours, music, kid’s carillon concerts & demonstrations. Free admission. No passes or RSVP necessary. 8 a.m. - 5 p.m. Bol Tower Gardens, 1151 Tower Blvd., Lake Wales. Info: BokTowerGardens.org. F Sept. 10 & 17 / Oct. 8 & 22: 2nd Saturday Market In Downtown Winter Haven — Free community event sponsored by The 863 Magazine. Family and pet-friendly. Vendors may include fresh produce, arts, crafts, home-baked goods, food trucks, live music entertainment, etc. Central Park off of Central Ave., downtown Winter Haven. 9 am - 3 pm. Info: CentralFloridaEventVendors.com or 863-258-3561. See ad page 3. F Sept. 10: 13th Annual Lakeland Cardboard Boat Challenge and Lakes Festival This event helps raise awareness about our water resources and how we all must play a role in protecting them. People can reduce their impact on the environment through the lifestyle choices they make every day. Celebrate our lakes and join the fun. 8:30 a.m. Lake Hollingsworth Boat Ramp, 920 Lake Hollingsworth Drive, Lakeland. Info: LakesEducation.org. F Sept. 16 & October 21: Musical Hammers & Dulcimer Night Downtown Winter Haven. 5:30 – 7 p.m. Info: 863-2979387. See image upper right. F Sept. 18: Latino Fest Food, vendors,
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September / October 2016
and live entertainment. Celebrate the incredibly diverse Latino culture, arts, and customs. 2- 7 p.m. Haines City Public Library, 111 N. 6th St., Haines City. Info: HainesCity.com. F Sept. 24 & Oct. 22 Market in the Park Monthly Market in the Park, plus a free concert. Fresh produce, honey, oils, food vendors and more. This will be one fun-filled family event. 4 7 p.m. Spence Field Park, Mulberry. 863-425-1125. F Sept. 24: The Purple Xperience Celebrate the unique and talented life and music of Prince with this special tribute concert. 8 p.m., doors open at 7 p.m. Polk Theatre, Lakeland. Info: ChilloungeNight.com. F Sept. 26: Chat & Chew Free Book Reviews of The China Study, authored by Dr. Colin Campbell, October Chat and Chew Skype Speaker. Nat West will lead this review and also review The Blue Zones a National Geographic study of the longest-lived people in the world. Free meeting. 4:30 - 5:30 p.m. Winter Haven Library, large meeting room, 325 Avenue A NW, Winter Haven. Info: 54321health@gmail.com. F Sept. 29: Author Talk Florida mystery writer Tim Dorsey will discuss his series of books, including his newest edition. 6 - 7 p.m. Schoenoff Meeting Room in Lake Wales Public Library. 290 Cypress Garden Lane, Lake Wales, FL 33853. Info: 863-6784004 or library@cityoflakewales.com. F Sept. 30 & Oct. 28 Dixieland Last Friday Most businesses between the Tudor to Dixieland Relics will be open with special events at each place. Check out the Dixieland Revolution Facebook for more information. Free event, some vendors charge for specific items and any food or alcohol tastings. Dixieland, Lakeland. 6 - 9 p.m. Info: 863-559-8356. F Oct. 7: 1st Friday Pickin’ in the Park Sing along song books provided. 6:30 - 8 p.m. Info: 863-297-9387. F Oct. 9: Nature Walk at Mackay Gardens and Lakeside Preserve A free tour is led by Steve Franklin, interpretive guide. It includes such topics as: the cultural and natural history of this area, environmental concerns, and entertaining poetry. 2 - 3:30 p.m. Mackay Gardens, Lake Alfred. Free but please sign up for the walk; contact the Lake Alfred Parks and Recreation Department at 863-291-5272 or aquinones@mylakealfred.com. F Oct. 13: Chat & Chew Skype session with international expert and father of nutrition, Dr. Colin Campbell. Learn
about Campbell’s research of diet and cancer. Also Skype with his daughter Dr. LeAnne Campbell, cookbook author. Arrive early-limited seating. Free. 12 - 2 p.m. Winter Haven Library, 325 Avenue A NW, Winter Haven. Info: 54321health@ gmail.com. F Oct. 13: Music Under the Stars Presenting a blend of classic and innovative repertoire, directors Jo Jossim and Paul Butcher lead their respective ensembles through an evening of music certain to engage and entertain young and old alike. Free event. Florida Southern College, Pipkin Bandshell (rain location: Branscomb Auditorium). 7:30 PM - 9 p.m. Info: 863-680-4296 or FLSouthern.edu. F Oct. 15-16: Rootstock Plant & Garden Festival Dozens of plant vendors, local musical artists, healthy cuisine and a spectacular display of seasonal foliage. Admission is free both days. 8 a.m. - 5 p.m. Info: BokTowerGardens.org. F Oct. 22: 32nd Annual Munn Park Extravaganza A variety of plants, flowers, trees, and garden related art for sale. Free admission. 8 a.m. to 3 p.m. Munn Park, downtown Lakeland. Info: 863-3704065. F Oct. 26: 60th Annual Fashion Show Fundraiser “The Nifty 50’s” fashions for the whole family provided by Macy’s of Winter Haven, hosted by the Bouquet Garden Club. Silent auction, food from local restaurants. Tickets $25. 12 noon (lunch) or 6 p.m. (dinner). Winter Haven Garden Center, 715 3rd St. NW. Info: 863293-7638. F Oct. 29: Ghouls’ Night Out is now “Ghouls DAY Out!” Don’t miss this Halloween fun of trick or treating, games, and candy. 10 a.m. - 2 p.m. at MLK Park / Lake Silver in Winter Haven. Info: 863-2915656 or MyWinterHaven.com.