Wednesday February 28, 2018
Bogans to rock the mat By Jamie Adams and Julia Czerwonatis
We all know yoga comes in many variations – iyender, ashtanga, bikram, even ‘hot’ – but it’s unlikely the gurus of India would have anticipated a ‘bogan’ twist to their ancient practice. A troupe of five comedians is bringing Bogan Yoga to Wellington with their unique routines that include ‘Hoon the Goon’, ‘Downwa rd Facing Doggy Style’ and ‘Handle the Jandal’, as well as an ‘Omm’ meditation that morphs into air guitar. The performance is interactive, with audience members encouraged to get on a mat and follow as they would to any yoga class. But instead of yoga pants and world music, they should expect leopard-print tights and rock music, as the four female instructors help them unleash their ‘inner bogan’. The four shows, part of next month’s 2018 Fringe Festival, won’t be Bogan Yoga’s first appearance in Wellington - the troupe originally performed as part of the NZ International Comedy
Festival in 2015. The show was conceived by Newtown’s Hilaire Carmody, who was inspired by a need to step out of the formalities of traditional exercise routines. “I was at the gym one day and felt like a dirtbag compared to the others. I thought ‘why don’t we do bogan yoga’?” Stand-up comedians Julz Burgisser and Frankie Vallis from Aro Valley joined the Bogan Yoga crew, together with three others to do a series of shows at Whitireia Performance Centre in 2015. It struck such a chord that they then took it to Hastings for its Fringe Festival last year, where feedback was so positive they kept it going for this year with a new line-up. This time the lead instructor is Jackie Daniels, played by Frankie, who promises no judgement for those who drive a V8 and happen to enjoy yoga. “No one will judge you if your tramp stamp is showing or if you turn up in an Evanescence t-shirt,” she says. “It’s about honouring and connecting with the inner rock star inside all of us.”
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The Bogan Yoga characters of Jewelz, Jackie, Suze, Natalia and Dan in one of their rockin’ poses. PHOTO: Jamie Adams Bogan Yoga will be held at the Scruffy Bunny Improv Theatre in the Reading Courtenay Central complex at 2pm and 4pm on March 10 and 24. Tickets are $20 and it is recommended for people 15 and over.
Resilience to disasters takes priority in Wellington’s 10-year budget Wellington Mayor Justin Lester says there will be an unprecedented level of investment in resilience initiatives over the next 10 years. “We must do all we can to ensure the city is ready for events like the 2016 Kaikoura earthquake, as well as the threats of climate change and sea-level rise,” he says. “Last July slips closed roads in Ngaio and Ngauranga Gorge, and we’ve narrowly escaped [cyclone] Gita recently. “As a city we need to be ready to face these adverse events to minimise disruption to the everyday lives of Wellingtonians, and allow the city to bounce back as soon as possible.” The Mayor says that in any emergency situation, there needs to be certainty about what’s happening with water – drinking water, wastewater and stormwater. The capital spend on resilience in the city is expected to sit around the $280 million mark and will form part of the debate in the council’s draft Ten Year Plan deliberations next week. A $32 million programme of capital funding work to complete the Prince of Wales/ Omaroro Reservoir work over 10 years is one of several key projects Wellingtonians can expect to see when the council’s draft ten-year budget is released at the end of this week. A further $6.2 million is allocated in the proposed plan to upgrade parts of the central city wastewater network to accommodate growth and improve resilience. “Our suburbs are also tagged for stormwater upgrades, including $9 million for flood-prone areas of Tawa and a further $10 million to upgrade the Miramar Peninsula,” Justin says. An additional $300,000 of capital funding has been allocated to carry out coastal erosion repairs at Worser Bay, Seatoun Beach and Evans Bay. “Being a coastal city means Wellington
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is the first cab off the rank for the effects of sea-level rise, so we have to act now.” Wellington City Council will also assume responsibility for the cost of repairs of lateral pipes at a cost of $250,000 per annum. Resilience portfolio holder Iona Pannett says waste will be another priority. “There is a commitment to reducing casual plastic use like shopping bags, having a discussion around the rationalisation of landfills in
the region, and starting to move the landfill to a resource recovery centre,” the councillor says. Other proposed upgrades include building strengthening, provision for storm clean-ups, and transport infrastructure improvements to Ngaio Gorge, Seatoun Tunnel, Northland Tunnel and the Kelburn Viaduct. The draft Ten Year Plan document will be discussed by council on 7 March 7, and formal consultation will begin on April 15.
Keep yourself safe The biggest topic in computing these days is security – protection against hackers, scammers and ransomware. Most days we get calls from customers who think they’ve been hacked. You may imagine young men working alone at their computer but sadly computer hacking has become big business and so the need to protect yourself has never been greater. So, what to do? 1. Be very cautious about any email that comes from someone you don’t recognise. If you are suspicious, delete the email and then delete it again from your deleted folder. DON’T OPEN
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THE EMAIL. 2. If someone calls you up to tell you there’s a problem with your computer and they can help you – that’s deﬁnitely a scam. Just tell that person you know this a scam and hang up. 3. Check that you have a good anti-virus software on your computer. We recommend a product called ESET 4. Never give anyone your password – not IRD, not your Bank, not the police nor any government agency. 5. Back up your computer ﬁles. An automated on-line service is best but failing that, back up to an external hard drive.
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Independent Herald 28-02-18