The Cascade Vol. 25 Issue 31

NOVEMBER 22 TO NOVEMBER 29, 2017

VOLUME 25 ISSUE 31

Pissing against the grain since 1993

YES or NO

It’s one or the other. pg. 8-9

Desert Bus Bringing hope, with Child’s Play, while driving to Las Vegas.

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The Bear Preview of UFV Theatre department’s season opener.

WWW.UFVCASCADE.CA

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Angel Olsen Her music is angelic.

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WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 22, 2017

Editorial // STAFF Editor-in-Chief Joel Robertson-Taylor joel@ufvcascade.ca Business Manager Quintin Stamler quintin@ufvcascade.ca Production Manager Caleb Campbell caleb@ufvcascade.ca Production Assistant Satinder Dhillon satinder@ufvcascade.ca Copy Editor Cat Friesen cat@ufvcascade.ca Illustrator Amara Gelaude amara@ufvcascade.ca Online Editor Jeff Mijo jeff@ufvcascade.ca Staff Writer Aleister Gwynne aleister@ufvcascade.ca Distributor Liam Ritchie distributor@ufvcascade.ca

Managing Editor Kat Marusiak kat@ufvcascade.ca News Editor Joel Robertson-Taylor joel@ufvcascade.ca Junior News Editor Jessica Barclay jessica@ufvcascade.ca Opinion Editor Jeff Mijo jeff@ufvcascade.ca Feature Editor Laurel Logan laurel@ufvcascade.ca Culture & Events Editor Cassie de Jong cassie@ufvcascade.ca Arts in Review Editor Martin Castro martin@ufvcascade.ca Varsity Writer Rachelle Strelezki rachelle@ufvcascade.ca Staff Writer Panku Sharma panku@ufvcascade.ca

THIS WEEK’S CONTRIBUTORS Alexia Baptista Shauna Pearce Cover: Caleb Campbell Back Cover: Paid advertisment

WWW.UFVCASCADE.CA

@UFVCASCADE FACEBOOK.COM/UFVCASCADE INSTAGRAM.COM/THE.CASCADE Volume 25 · Issue 31 Room S2111 33844 King Road Abbotsford, BC V2S 7M8 604.854.4529

The Cascade is UFV’s autonomous student newspaper. It originated under its current name in 1993, and achieved autonomy from the university and the Student Union Society in 2002. This means that The Cascade is a forum for UFV students to have their journalism published in an entirely student-run setting. It also acts as an alternative press for the Fraser Valley.

The Cascade is funded with UFV student funds, and is overseen by the Cascade Journalism Society Board, a body run by a student majority. The Cascade is published every Wednesday with a print circulation of 1,250 and is distributed at Abbotsford, Chilliwack (CEP), Clearbrook, and Mission UFV campuses and throughout the surrounding communities.

The Cascade is open to written, photo, and design work from all students; these can come in the form of a pitch to an editor, or an assignment from an editor. Writers meetings are held every second Monday at 12:00 p.m. in The Cascade’s office on the Abbotsford campus.

In order to be published in the newspaper, all work must first be approved

by The Cascade’s editor-in-chief, copy editor, and corresponding section editor. The Cascade reserves the right to edit submissions for clarity and length. The Cascade will not print any articles that contain racist, sexist, homophobic or libellous content. Letters to the editor, while held to the same standard, are unedited, and should be under 400 words. As The Cascade is an autonomous student publication, opinions expressed do not necessarily reflect that of UFV, The Cascade’s staff and collective, or associated members.

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So, women are easy, most are bitches, and if I get them drunk, I’ll have a good lay?

That’s what the lyrics to the songs played in the SUB have taught me JOEL ROBERTSON-TAYLOR EDITOR-IN-CHIEF

The Makita drill in the utility closet looks mighty comforting — the sound of a half-inch drive bit penetrating — first through the delicate flesh and cartilage around my ear hole, then working its way through the acoustic meatus, the eardrum, shredding the cochlear nerve, and straight into the brain — it sounds extraordinarily pleasing compared to the sound of whatever evil falls from the ceiling of the SUB. If the Student Union gets half as many complaints as The Cascade does, regarding the volume and kind of music played in the SUB, I’m shocked something hasn’t been done already.

“Hey, do you guys know who controls the music?” “Can we study in here, the music is kind of distracting.”

The music is only moderately short of excruciating. (Excruciate: from the Latin excruciatus. Cruciare: literally to crucify (from crux) on on a cross.)

But I am no martyr, and I can’t believe there’s any redemption from this.

Sometimes I catch myself whistling the tune, not because it’s catchy, but because it’s been forcefully thrust into my dome, over and over and over again.

I’m in love with your body.

I keep thinking, we gotta get away from here. I don’t even know what

from. Don’t be afraid to catch feels.

Huh? Remember when CIVL was broadcasted in the SUB for one day? That was great. What about all the plans that ended in disaster?

Actually, CIVL station manager Aaron Levy went so far as get permission from the SUS, created a customized playlist, and wrote up a policy (the language SUS speaks) for playing CIVL programming. Not good enough.

Promise me no promises. After one day of playing, for whatever reason, the plan was axed.

Initially, the resistance from the Student Union to CIVL programming playing in the SUB came from the assertion that it’s student study space — CIVL would be too distracting. But there’s always fewer students in the SUB later in the semester; I’m certain they’re ODing on the music. It’s too distracting to you make me feel like a dangerous woman study around. Estoy muy duro, sí, ok, ahí vamos.

My ears ache; my brain, colonized by trash. I could give a thousand reasons why. Quite frankly, most of these lyrics conflict with my values, c'mon, strip that down for me, baby, and the values that the institution keeps overcompensating with. Yeah, I'm on fire and I know that it burns.

Exaggeration and sarcasm aside,

UFV Student Union and Campus Community Radio Societies Student Union Building Public Address Content Memorandum EFFECTIVE: March 5 2017 AUTHORITY: RATIFIED BY: Societies Committee RELATED DOCUMENTS: Purpose: The Student Union Society utilizes a public address system throughout the SUB, while CIVL Radio produces content for servicing of UFV students, and the broader UFV community with music, local programming, and public service/events information. This document provides guidelines for what content may be included in SUB Public Address material, as provided by CIVL. 1.0 Responsibilities 1.1 CIVL will provide and maintain an electronic database of files that may include the following:

here’s the real problem: far too many of the songs played in the SUB are offensive and crude. Actually, sometimes, the sign of the times, they’re disgusting. Am I coming out of left field?

I'm fired up and tired of the way that things have been, oh ooh.

Is it ironic that there’s this big kick to fight sexual harassment, the subjectification of women, and the commodification of sex, yet I can’t get a coffee without listening to someone sing about all three of those things? No, it’s just disheartening. Oh, I've been shaking, I love it when you go crazy.

But now, I’m starting to sound like a broken record, or, to use a relevant idiom, the playlist in the SUB. Final summation: if a song refers to a woman as a bitch, implies disagreement between physical contact, or promotes blurred lines as a way to get laid, it shouldn’t be played in a public space.

Breaking it down, this is not an issue of taste, and this shouldn’t be a conversation about good versus bad music.

This is an issue of over sexualization, misogyny, and values.

If you’re tired of it, email your union.

The SUB is student space; students can change the music.

Also, here’s a copy of the policy:

1.1.1 In-offensive music 1.1.2 Public Service Announcements relevant to UFV students; 1.1.3 Events promotion relevant to UFV students; 1.1.4 Show Promos alerting listeners to various CIVL programs; 1.1.5 CIVL station identifications.

1.2.1 SUS will ensure that content provided by CIVL is connected to the SUB public address system and that periodic updates to the content database are administered within a mutually agreeable timeframe.

2.0 Limitations 2.1 Content provided will not include the following: 2.1.1 Noticeable profanity; 2.1.2 Disturbing or offensive lyrics or imagery communicated through other auditory means; 2.1.3 Particularly loud, heavy, noisy, or intrusive musical selections; 2.1.4 Advertisements paid for by CIVL customers unless otherwise agreed upon by SUS.

NEWS

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 22, 2017

Housing //

NEWS BRIEFS

UFV Sweater Week 2017 Sustainable UFV will be reducing UFV’s carbon footprint with sweater week. From November 20-24, the thermostats at UFV will turned down slightly, encouraging UFV students, staff, and faculty to layer up, and stay cozy.

Participants are encouraged to show off their best, coziest, and craziest sweaters with a selfie taken at one of the Sustainable Selfie Stations, and shared to UFV’s social media. An overall grand prize will be given away, along with secondary prizes for the daily themes: Anything Goes Monday, Earth-tone Tuesday, Stripe Wednesday, Throw-back Thursday, and Hoodie Friday.

TWU increases student numbers to help meet B.C. teacher demand Trinity Western University (TWU) reports that it has doubled its School of Education capacity, from 40 to 85 students, this year.

According to the Langley Advance, TWU is one of the few universities B.C. to offer a concurrent education degree. Students begin taking education courses in the first year, which allows them to develop as a teacher sooner.

“Our concurrent education program means we get highly committed and motivated students choosing our program who feel a calling to the teaching profession from very early on,” said TWU School of Education Dean Allyson Jule. “Also, they are well prepared for the classroom when they graduate because they have so much more time to really come to see themselves as teachers.”

Since 2001, it has graduated more than 400 teachers.

-the Langley Advance

King Road rental development gets council approval

Plans for a new apartment complex along King Road receive council approval to move foreword JESSICA BARCLAY JR. NEWS EDITOR

A new apartment complex near the University of the Fraser Valley, on the corner of King Road and King Connector was approved by Abbotsford city council.

The planned complex will contain three buildings housing a total of 204 rental units. The buildings will be four, five, and six stories tall with a total of 5,500 square feet of commercial space on the ground floor of one of the buildings.

Craig Toews, vice president external of UFV campus planning and property development, estimated that the complexes will be on the market by as early as the end of 2018.

The King Road apartment complexes will be part of the first steps towards the development of the UDistrict Neighbourhood Plan, Abbotsford’s plan for the longterm development of UFV and the surrounding neighbourhood.

“When the city approached us, one of our precepts for UDistrict was about densification of our campus and redevelopment,” Toews said. “Also better transit, connecting to Abbotsford and downtown.”

‘Also in the works’ The initial stage of the plans will also include a pedestrian and bike lane overpass, and additional residential buildings, both of which have already been approved to move forward by the city council.

The overpass will span the freeway from Salton Road on the south side to Salton Road on the north side.

“So many of our students live north of the freeway and it will connect that community to the UDistrict without having to go through those two deathtraps,” said Toews, referring to the McCallum Road

roundabouts on the highway overpass.

“People are running through there like they’re Mario Andretti running the gauntlet.”

Two other residential complex plans are also in the works, in addition to the King Road apartments. The five-story residential building on the corner of McCallum and King Road will contain 93 rental units. Construction of the building is already underway, and Toews estimated that the apartments will come to market in March to June of 2018.

A mix of townhouses and condos are

planned for the old Towne Cinema lot.

Though the cinema has been torn down, Toews was unsure of the current timeline for the completion of this complex.

The next stage of the UDistrict plan will involve the rezoning of the light industrial complex along the north side of King Road, east of McCallum.

“The UDistrict plan is slowly working its way towards the centre. When it gets to the centre, here, at the University Village, it's going to be some really nice, cool plaza opportunities, ground floor commercial, and places to hang out,” said Toews.

Student Resources //

DRC now CAS New name broadens focus JESSICA BARCLAY JR. NEWS EDITOR

UFVs Disability Resource Center (DRC) recently changed its name to the Centre for Accessibility Services (CAS), to better align with the general change in the industry. The CAS works to accommodate UFV students with disabilities, and to facilitate their learning.

“The name change focuses on broader processes around accessibility, focusing less on the person and difficulties they may be experiencing and more on the intersection between learning environment and student,” said Seanna Takacs, acting coordinator at the Centre for Accessibility.

The centre’s role will stay the same: to support student learning and provide information for students and the communi-

ty on disability issues and the implications for disabilities for education planning and delivery.

“The mission of the centre is the same — to support accommodation planning, accessibility, and to act as a resource for students, staff, and faculty and even beyond, into the community,” Takacs said.

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NEWS

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 22, 2017

In Photos //

In loving memory: Cst. John Davidson

On Sunday, Nov. 19, UFV Abbotsford hosted attendees of APD Constable John Davidson's funeral.

Space in the Envision Athletic Centre was provided to accommodate overflow from the Abbotsford Centre

Photos: The Cascade

Stories worth paying attention to

#Preventable

#LinkedCrisis

Siege of Eastern Ghouta: A blot on the world's conscience Damascus Specialist Hospital in Syria’s capital, Damascus, is being forced to reuse otherwise single-use surgical equipment due to lack of medical equipment available, Al Jazeera reported. As part of a four-year-long siege on the rebel-held area, Syrian president Bashar al-Assad has blocked access to medical equipment and supplies, endangering the nearly 400,000 inhabitants who depend on the hospital for medical services.

The evacuation of 452 people from the local area by the United Nations is being delayed due to bureaucratic interruptions, frustrating doctors. Nine people have passed away since July, and workers have identified 29 more individuals who have a 100 per cent chance of survival, but will die without immediate treatment.

-Al Jazeera

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#Eviction

Vancouver’s housing and opioid crises are linked, says addiction expert Johann Hari, a journalist, addictions expert, and the New York Times best-selling author of Chasing the Scream: The First and Last Days of the War on Drugs, believes that Vancouver’s housing market may be one of the underlying causes for the current opioid crisis.

Research by Bruce Alexander, a former psychology professor at Simon Fraser University, indicated that additional factors other than the drugs themselves causes addiction, backing up this conclusion.

"The core of addiction is about not wanting to be present in your life, because your life is too painful a place to be," Hari said. "To a large degree … addiction is a response to your environment."

-the CBC

B.C. Supreme Court orders end to fish farm occupation The B.C. Supreme Court has demanded protesters at a Marine Harvest fish farm remove their tents and other structures from the property by this Friday. Musgamagw, Namgis, and Mamalilikulla First Nations have been occupying the Swanson and Midsummer fish farms, in protest of their operation in the the Musgamakw Dzawada’enuxw people’s territory, reported the Tyee.

-the Tyee

OPINION

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 22, 2017

Commerce //

Who killed Sears Canada?

What is causing major retail chains to fail?

ALEISTER GWYNNE STAFF WRITER

Sears Canada recently announced that it is going out of business, and plans to liquidate all of its stores in Canada. This comes as a shock, since Sears has operated in Canada since 1953, and operated about 130 outlets employing around 12,000 people at the time of the announcement, according to a recent CBC article. However, the truth is that the seemingly solid retail chain had been ailing for the better part of a decade, locked in a downward spiral that is now nearing its final conclusion. “I knew it was going to happen, it was not a shock to Sears employees,” said Zobeida Maharaj, a Sears worker of 28 years, who was quoted in the same article.

So, what happened? A follow-up article from the CBC reveals many sources of blame that are being slung around by those concerned, from competition by more innovative stores, to allegations that Sears Holdings CEO Edward Lampert selfishly pocketed profits that could have been reinvested into the business. The straw that broke the camel’s back was likely the company’s “Sears 2.0” marketing and rebranding strategy, which was launched last year with the hope that it would reinvent and revitalize the brand; but all it did was con-

sume more money that the increasingly cash-strapped company could ill afford to lose.

However, the circumstances surrounding Sears’ withdrawal from our country (the U.S. branch will continue) go well beyond the company’s internal decisions.

Sears may actually represent a business model that is struggling to survive in the current economic climate.

The rise of e-commerce, such as online retailer Amazon, has been cited as a threat to the department store model, and the CBC article cites a failure to develop a proper online shopping apparatus as one of the factors in Sears Canada’s failure. However, according to a New York Times article from 2015, online competition is more of a threat to big box stores like Walmart and Costco, which are in a league of their own, with only 10 per cent of retail sales being conducted online.

According to the article, the real reason why department stores like Sears, Macy’s, and JC Penny’s are suffering is something much more sinister — income inequality.

Sears, and brands like it, have tradition-

ally gone after the middle-class market, but as the middle-class struggles against inflation, stagnant wages, and vanishing benefits, this social group has less purchasing power than it did in the past.

Other businesses have been undercutting them from both above, by high-end retailers with more specialized wares, and from below, by big box brands like Walmart and Costco that offer a wide range of cheap products. “There are varying gradients of dead or dying or flat, but anything in the middle is problematic,” said Steven Lowy, co-chief executive of Westfield Corporation, which owns several shopping malls around the world, who was quoted in the Times article.

A 2016 article from Business Insider also cites mall closures as a major factor in why department stores are going under.

Department stores traditionally comprise the so-called “anchor stores” of most shopping malls, and malls could be said to be their natural habitat. With increasing mall closures over the years, fewer locations are available for department stores to use, which cuts into their earnings. This creates

“The real reason why department stores like Sears, Macy’s, and JC Penny’s are suffering is something much more sinister — income inequality.”

a negative feedback loop wherein closure of anchor stores cause malls to suffer, unless and until they can be replaced. If they cannot, or if their bad fortune continues regardless, then the mall will close, and department store brands will have fewer viable locations to choose from.

These broader trends mean trouble for the department store business model, but the failure of Sears Canada cannot be laid entirely at the feet of circumstances that they had no control over. According to the CBC, Sears Canada had gone through three CEOs in the last four years, each time bringing new ideas, and a new direction.

Sears certainly needed to change course, either towards a more diverse and low-tier selection, or by attempting to appeal to upmarket shoppers; but Sears dithered, and sat on the fence for too long. The constant changes in leadership robbed the company of a clear direction that it could stick to. It would also have helped if Sears had been able to begin the transition years earlier, before their funds began to dwindle, and before they had sold off so many of their locations. The Sears 2.0 initiative may have been the right idea, but by the time it was rolled out, it was too little, too late.

Charity //

Desert Bus brings the hope we all need

A BC-based charity fundraiser is turning the world’s most boring video game into pure positivity for the 11th year running.

JEFF MIJO OPINION EDITOR

This is one of my favourite weeks of the year.

Sure, it’s always cold and rainy, and yeah, final projects are due, and exams are looming, but there’s something that sets it completely apart from all of the other dreary, late-fall weeks: an event called Desert Bus for Hope.

Desert Bus for Hope (or just Desert Bus, for short) is an online fundraiser based out of Victoria, B.C., which supports Child’s Play, a charity that buys toys, games, and other items for hospitals, with the goal of helping children dealing with illness cope with such a stressful and scary time. Desert Bus started in 2007, and as of November 19 this year, has surpassed $4 million (USD) raised in total, with the past four years each raising over $500,000 in the span of a single week.

How do they do it? Desert Bus is the world’s first live-streamed video game marathon fundraiser, during which the participants, a team that has grown to around 60 volunteers, play what is one of the worst video games ever made, and certainly the most tedious. The game, Desert Bus for the Sega CD, has a simple goal: drive a bus along a perfectly straight road between Tucson and Las Vegas. It’s an eight-hour trip with no curves, no traffic, and no challenge to speak of, beyond a slight issue where the bus slowly lists to the right, requiring constant adjustment to keep it from veering off the road. The drivers must keep near-constant focus to keep the bus from crashing, which

is no small feat for three reasons: the game is intensely boring, they’re driving in 12-hour shifts, and the room around them is filled with excitement, hilarity, and positivity. The longer people keep donating, the longer they have to play.

While the game is the ostensible draw for Desert Bus for Hope, that last point is the real reason the live-stream has had a steady audience in the 4,000 – 5,000 range since this year’s run kicked off on November 17.

The driver is never alone: there’s always a host of other volunteers in the room performing skits and songs, chatting casually, accepting challenges from the viewers, and auctioning off or giving away prizes donated by absurdly talented crafters. The real meat of Desert Bus comes with sinking in to watch for a good length of time, and just revelling in the fun, the positivity, and the hope mentioned in the event’s title.

That tone of the event, the good-naturedness of it all, permeates every aspect of the week. Even beyond the fact that the volunteers putting on the event are putting in an incredible amount of effort and time to raise a massive amount of money for charity, over the course of the week, you’ll realize that they are also a group of wonderful, caring people. It’s from the little things, like making a point to use inclusive language such as welcoming people of all genders rather than “ladies and gentlemen,” or making the event family friendly by replacing swear words with the word “bus” (though slip-ups happen with unsurprisingly regularity). There

are bigger gestures, too: there’s a blanket ban on discussing current events (namely politics) on camera or in the chatroom, and more so than ever this year, that’s a much needed reprieve.

We can’t, and shouldn’t, hide from the myriad of turmoils going on in the world right now, but we also can’t immerse ourselves in them 24/7, all year long. We have to take breaks, to have a chance to laugh until we cry, to get lost in the crazy shenanigans until we realize it’s 4:00 a.m., and to immerse ourselves in an overpowering environment of positivity and love. For me, Desert Bus is that week, and this is my eighth year of that tradition. As much as possible without failing classes or skipping out on work, I dedicate this week to relaxing and recharging

with a group of people who remind me that, for all of the world’s problems, it’s filled with genuinely amazing, caring, generous people.

That’s where the hope part comes from, and if the world has enough people as amazing as the ones involved in Desert Bus, both on screen, and the thousands of supporters around the world, I think we can have some hope for the future.

If you want to join in on the adventure, Desert Bus for Hope will be streaming until sometime late Thursday, November 23, or early November 24, depending on donations. You can watch, join the chat, challenge the volunteers, or donate at www.desertbus. org.

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OPINION

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 22, 2017

Who grades the graders?

Ode to Oldhand

With registration for the winter semester upon us, it’s that time of the year where we start asking our friends, “Have you ever taken a course with so-and-so? How was it? Was it tough?” And sometimes weighing which of multiple professors offering the same course we should choose.

One resource for finding out about past students’ experience is ratemyprofessors. com, which allows for short reviews of instructors. Most of UFV’s have at least a handful, and by and large I’ve agreed with the general consensus on most of the profs I’ve taken (though there’s always a handful who have harsh, seemingly very bitter criticisms that you have to take with a grain of salt). But many of these reviews are from a decade ago, or even earlier, and especially when choosing courses in evolving fields or online courses, they can be very different. So, I’m just here to encourage you to take 10 minutes, and write a quick review for the professors you’ve taken courses with — help your favourites get more students, and warn of potential challenges you faced. You’ll make someone who’s agonizing over course selection’s life just a little easier.

I’ve always loved coffee shops — the smell of freshly ground coffee and baked scones, the constant background noise, the people watching. If I could, I’d spend all my free time hanging out in coffee shops, typing away on my laptop, or reading some Gothic novel I found at Hemingway’s. I think what I like most about coffee shops, though, is the fact that you could go anywhere in the world, and find a similar place to sit back, enjoy a coffee, and watch strangers pass by. Even in a strange city, coffee shops are a haven for the homesick.

At my favourite Abbotsford haunt, Oldhand, everyone is friendly, and takes a genuine interest in how you’re doing. The food is great, the espresso is phenomenal, and even though it’s often crowded, I can usually snag a corner table by the window, where I can hide for a few hours and get some work done. You get a good feeling when you’re supporting local businesses run by cool people, and one day, I’d love to open a small coffee shop of my own. But, if you come in to Oldhand before me, and don’t leave me any doughnuts, I will fight you.

Brief bits of bite sized brevity

Jeff Mijo

SNAPSHOTS

Seismic shifts

Internot

I believe reality functions much like plate tectonics. Perceptions change slowly — nobody notices the gradual shift. Then, millions of years later (or seemingly millions of years later), self-proclaimed smart men tell us the way things are: we’ve observed, based on the never-changing processes of the world, that everything is knowable and we’re the ones who know it.

But, like a precarious rock shifting suddenly along a fault line, all at once, everything is no longer the way it once was — if you believe in abrupt reality shifts, complete loss of orientation. Could physical laws change, too? What if we carry our history and consciousness with us into this new way of things, but nothing else?

The ocean turns red, the sky folds inside out, sentience becomes more of an afterthought to a flagrant gluttony for pleasure. Craziness. How would we explain it?

A world where everything you know is no longer the way things are. It would be funny if this happened far more frequently than we realized, and arguing over who knows more about something that never happened is just a game of distraction.

If you’d told humanity 20 years ago how abruptly our days would grind to a halt when the internet cut out, they’d tell you that you were mad. Yet here we are: in a few short decades, our level of internetdependency has skyrocketed. I remember a time before the internet (or at least before it was prevalent in the day-to-day life of average people), and I certainly never felt like I was missing out on something.

But now, when Shaw says — as it so often does — hey, maybe you shouldn’t have a connection for the next five minutes, I’m left to wander aimlessly around my home, trying to find something to pass my time until the connection comes back, and I can resume my work. Maybe I’ll tidy up my desk a little (those receipts are starting to pile up), or unload the dishwasher (it’s been sitting full all day). I’d do some studying, but I got all e-textbooks this semester, so I can’t load them up. I don’t even have a data plan for my phone, so I can’t go complain about it on Twitter.

What a pathetic excuse for a millennial I am. If only I had some other, more traditional medium in which to complain.

Illustrations: Amara Gelaude

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Joel Robertson-Taylor

Cat Friesen

Curtailed commentary on current conditions

Jeff Mijo

STUDY BREAK Crossword //

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 22, 2017

Made by Cassie de Jong

ACROSS

DOWN

3: A type of grass harvested for its seeds, which are used to make flour.

1: The line formed by sewing together pieces of fabric.

5: Black and white striped equidae.

2: A word used to describe a dark brown, almost black object.

7: Unit that makes up molecules.

8: A word that describes a person, place, or thing.

9: When stopped at an intersection, you wait for the _ _ _ to turn green.

12: Most eastern province in Canada.

14: Hydrated prune.

16: An explosive device.

17: Tiny, unusually shaped candies made

by Nestlé 18: The sound a horse makes.

3: Liquid ice.

4: Canada has 10 provinces, and three _ _ _.

5: Tiny organisms drifting in large bodies of water, that are a source of food for whales.

6: An individual over the age of 19.

10: Not many.

11: A thick hair product used for stiffness on short hair.

12: Synthetic polymer used to make fabric and clothing.

13: Female spirit from Greek mythology that lives in forests, rivers, mountains, seas, etc.

Horoscope //

LAST ISSUE’S ANSWERS:

15: Female horse.

Across:

Down:

16: A lure used in fishing, trapping, etc.

2: Ecosystem 5: Quarter 6: Folk 7: Reservation 8: Echo 9: Parfait 10: Eavesdrop

1: Oscar 2: Espresso 3: Millennia 4: Hurricane 6: Flip-flop 9: Panda

Astrological mysteries rudely interpreted by Lady May

Aries — Mar 21 to Apr 19 In a debate, you would rather change the subject than change your mind. Newsflash!

Unless you’re a vending machine, change is inevitable.

Leo — Jul 23 to Aug 22 Leos are 73 per cent more likely to have to retake a course. But who’s counting? Don’t let statistics do a number on you.

Taurus — Apr 20 to May 20 Your attention to detail is indeed a blessing, but sometimes you simply see things that aren’t there. You seem convinced that at some point in your life, you have been either abducted by aliens, or been the target of some government conspiracy

Virgo —Aug 23 to Sep 22 You have the cosmic ability of always knowing things about other people. This would be more helpful if your ability wasn’t exclusive to inconsequential details, like their favourite fast food place, or whether or not they sort their trash.

Gemini — May 21 to Jun 20 Word on the street is Geminis are crazy good at keeping secrets, so I’ll share one of mine with you. All horoscopes are wrong except this one. Shhh, don’t tell!

Cancer —Jun 21 to Jul 22 You are destined to accumulate untold amounts of wealth and fortune. Though this would be much better news if the road to riches wasn’t paved with homework.

Libra — Sep 23 to Oct 22 You love astronomy, because you’ve visited most of the planets. You know what the locals are like on Venus, and how the food tastes on Pluto. No one ever seems to believe your tales though. Strange.

Scorpio — Oct 23 to Nov 21 It might be best to avoid taking unnecessary gambles this week. That being said, your lucky numbers are 11, 17, 36, 41, and 62.

Illustration by: Amara Gelaude Sagittarius — Nov 22 to Dec 21 Someone will invite you to a karaoke party this week. But be warned, if the party features Britney Spears CDs, and/or pecan pie, it’s a trap!

Capricorn — Dec 22 to Jan 19 A foolish person listens to their heart. A wise person listens to their horoscope interpreter.

Bring me cookies.

Aquarius — Jan 20 to Feb 18 Your future is hard to determine, but it would be easier if you brought me cookies. Monday, 12 noon, Cascade office, SUB room S2111. See you there. (White chocolate macadamia is my favourite.)

Pisces — Feb 19 to Mar 20 You love to be the life of the party.

Unfortunately, this means you sometimes find yourself making jokes at other people’s expense. Just remember that the person who laughs last is laughing at you.

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Exploring boundaries and co A crash course on boundaries, consent, and sexual assault

I

t’s time to talk about consent, and by extension, boundaries. By this point, you may have seen the posters around campus, and heard about the UFV initiative “In This Together,” which focuses on bringing awareness to and educating the UFV community on intervention, disclosure, healthy relationships, and consent.

I’m also sure, over the last couple of years, you’ve heard about the scandals surrounding Harvey Weinstein, and Brock Turner, and Bill Cosby, and the countless issues of campus sexual assaults, and... you get the picture. Clearly, consent is something that we need to talk about, because violations of boundaries keep happening.

Though all of the above-mentioned problems are important for us to consider, campus sexual assault is extremely prevalent on Canadian campuses. According to a Stats Canada document from 2014, “261,000 incidents of sexual assault — 41% of all incidents — were reported by students,” of which the majority were committed against women, at 90 per cent. These numbers are startling.

These are only the ones that were reported; imagine the number of victims who were afraid to come forward, due to the stigma that surrounds those who report sexual assault.

Due to this glaring issue, In This Together was formed

by UFV staff, faculty, students, and community collaborators. According to Lauren Dallow, a student who helped construct the program, “In This Together was created in response to the Prevention, Education, and Response to sexualized violence policy passed by UFV in May 2017.

The policy adopts a four pillar approach that includes education, prevention, response, and support.” She also

said, “In This Together aims to educate UFV students and staff on what sexualized violence is, and to dispel some of the myths surrounding sexualized violence. Additionally, the program aims to equip UFV students and staff with the tools to help prevent sexualized violence in our community, as well as to help support students who disclose an experience of sexualized violence. In This Together offers three 90 minute workshops that cover the topics of healthy relationships and consent, active bystander intervention, and responding to disclosures of sexualized violence.”

The stigma, of course, is another widespread issue linked to sexual assault. I, and many friends I’ve spoken with on the issue, stay quiet because they’re worried about the backlash they’ll face. A lot of the time, victims are afraid that people won’t believe them when they tell their story. Worse, they’re worried about the shame and guilt that comes along with it; they should have said no more firmly, they should have stated clear boundaries, they should have been more careful. Even more disheartening, many feel that their situation wasn’t “bad enough,” that it could have turned out a lot worse than it did. I have one friend who went through what I consider a horrific experience, and she still thinks that what happened to her wasn’t all that terrible when compared with other people’s situations.

Now, let’s get technical. Merriam-Webster defines consent as “to give assent or approval,” and a boundary as “something that indicates or fixes a limit or extent.” In a social context, this means defining what you are and are not comfortable with, and respecting the limits that oth-

ers set for themselves. Of course, the dialogue we create around boundaries and consent is not limited to sexual assault. It can range anywhere from inappropriate comments, to touching someone non-sexually without them being okay with it. If someone states that they aren’t comfortable with something you’re doing, even if it’s as innocent as texting them non-stop, you stop. End of story.

Someone else’s boundaries are not up for debate.

One woman, Renee, told me about a time her boundaries were crossed. “I remember being 18 — still very much a kid — and taking a trip to the grocery store alone. As I was walking back to my car, a man who looked to be in his 30s approached me,” she said. “He licked his lips, rubbed his hands together in a creepy, predatory way, and said ‘Mmmm look at you, all thick and stuff.’ I’m no stranger to comments about my fat body. I felt violated and ashamed. My brain shut off and I couldn’t think of anything to say, so I just shot him a dirty look, and quickly stepped away as my face burned.”

Another woman, Alison, had her boundaries crossed at UFV recently. “I’d been talking with this guy in my chem class for a few weeks. He seemed like a cool guy, so when he asked for my number, I said yes. He texted me within five minutes of me giving to him, which I thought ‘that’s kind of weird, but okay.’ Then he started texting me all the time, and if I didn’t answer, he’d just send me more texts. It was awkward, because if I didn’t reply to those either, I’d have to see him in class, and he would give me weird looks. I felt guilty, and like the situation was my responsibility. Was I supposed to be answering his texts all the time? Was it my responsibility to build up a relation-

ship with a person I was starting to feel uncomfortable around?”

One UFV student, Janelle, tells us, “I was briefly separated from my friends while we were out at a club, when a man I’d never met approached me. Without even introducing himself, he asked if he could buy me a drink. I said, ‘No thanks,’ because I was trying to find my friends, and wasn’t interested in anyone buying a drink for me,” she said. “He then got closer to me and started to rub his hand up and down the side of my waist. I felt extremely uncomfortable, and immediately stepped away from him. Thankfully, my friends appeared and surrounded me, because they saw what was happening, and he left right away.”

Of the five men I spoke with, one admitted to being sexually assaulted, and of the 14 women I spoke with, 11 admitted to having been sexually assaulted at some point in their life, and only two had brought it to the attention of parents, school officials, or the police. The ones who didn’t report their assaults stated that “they weren’t sure if they’d given a clear no,” or they “knew the person, and didn’t want them getting in trouble... they’re a good person otherwise.”

One of the most common excuses I hear in defending the overstepping of boundaries is “they didn’t tell me to stop,” but a lack of a firm “no” is not a yes by any stretch.

The person may not be saying anything due to past traumatic experiences. They may have learned that not fighting back or causing a scene is a better, safer alternative — one that will get them through the situation with minimal physical harm.

onsent at UFV

If someone has had traumatic experiences in the past, they may have problems identifying personal boundaries, both for themselves, and when interacting with others. According to the Heal for Life Foundation, this is because physical, sexual, and emotional abuse all violate boundaries, which then causes the abused individual to form abnormal boundaries, or to not form them at all. From a young age, they learned that their personal space or rights didn’t matter, and because of this, they don’t assert themselves later in life.

But how do you tell if someone is uncomfortable in a situation if they don’t clearly state it? Well, you have to work on focusing your attention outward, and learn to better read body language of others. According to “A Field Guide for Comfort,” if the person you’re interacting with is physically distancing themselves from you, avoiding eye contact, rubbing their face or neck, or facing away from you, they’re probably uncomfortable. When you notice these signals, it’s time to back off and re-evaluate what you’re saying or doing to that person.

But what if you witness this behaviour in an interaction you’re not involved in? According to Dallow, “Often, people tend to think that the only way to prevent sexualized violence, or a situation that they fear might lead to sexualized violence, is to address the individuals directly, but not everyone is comfortable doing so.” She also said, “Other options are to delegate the situation to someone with more power than you; if you are witnessing a case of sexualized violence on campus, you can call security; if you’re at club, let the bartender or bouncer know; if you’re just out in the community, you can call the police. An-

other option is to distract the individuals involved; if you notice that your friend is in a situation that might lead to sexualized violence, you could tell them that you have something to show them, and attempt to pull them away.”

When asked how they react when they witness two people in an interaction where boundaries are clearly being crossed, several stated that they ignore it, saying that it’s “not their business.” Several female UFV students stated safety concerns; they’re worried that making themselves part of the situation would cause them physical harm. Although this is a valid fear, this is the exact behaviour that we as a society need to change.

However, the majority stated that they insert themselves into the situation; if they see that someone is noticeably uncomfortable when speaking with another person, they kindly, but firmly, step in. Some are subtle in their efforts, opting to draw the uncomfortable individual away from the other. Others are blatant in their efforts, electing to make their intents clear; they ask the uncomfortable individual if they are okay, and whether they can be of any assistance.

One UFV student, Megan, shared a story of when she stepped in to stop what was clearly an overstepping of boundaries. “I was walking through the halls one evening, and I noticed a man and a woman having what looked like a heated discussion. The man was leaning on the wall in front of the woman in a way that looked like he was trying to block the woman, so I walked up to them and asked if everything was alright. The woman only gave a slight shake of her head, but I asked the man to leave, and he did, then walked the woman to

Written by: Cat Friesen Layout by: Caleb Campbell

her car.”

When questioned on what she does when she sees boundaries being crossed, Janelle said “I’d do exactly what my friends did for me, by casually inserting myself into the situation to try and create somewhat of a barrier to block anything further from happening.”

Renee had a different answer. “This depends so much on the situation, and the power dynamics of those involved. I wish I could say I speak up every time I catch someone saying or doing anything that makes another person uncomfortable, but I’d be kidding myself.

For instance, I have an older, white, female co-worker who sometimes makes racist and transphobic comments out of ignorance,” she said. “One of my direct teammates is black, and up until recently we had a nonbinary coworker who uses they/ them pronouns. I know that my older coworker’s comments cross their boundaries, and are extremely hurtful, but I find it too difficult to challenge her directly. In this case, I voiced my concerns to our executive director, and had conversations with those affected. (“That was not okay, I am sorry she said that.”)

I’m definitely tuned in to others’ comfort levels, but my responses are often inadequate.”

When asked what a person should do if they’re currently experiencing harassment or abuse, Dallow said, “I would tell them that they don’t deserve to be subjected to sexualized violence, and if they would like help, or to talk to someone, there are a number of resources available to them both at UFV, and in the community. There is UFV counselling, the Peer Resource Learning Centre, APD Victim

Services, and VictimLinkBC, to name a few. Everyone has the right to choose what their path to healing looks like, but if you feel like you need help, please do not hesitate to reach out.”

One thing of significance to note is that creating and maintaining healthy boundaries is normal, and in fact, it’s expected. Everyone is entitled to declare what makes them comfortable and uncomfortable, and everyone else should adhere to another person’s boundaries as best they can. Alternately, if someone is crossing one of your boundaries, don’t worry about hurting their feelings; be assertive, and tell them that you aren’t comfortable with what they’re doing. Most people will be respectful and apologize, but if they don’t, it’s not your responsibility to apologize for causing conflict. You should never feel guilty or shamed for asserting your boundaries.

The best chance we have of putting an end to the problem of overstepping boundaries and disregarding consent is to talk about it. We need to end the stigma surrounding it, and we need more people to be aware that harassment and abuse are happening, so appropriate action can be taken to put an end to the problem. Consent and boundaries are important; we need to develop healthy boundaries of our own, and respect the boundaries of others, and if someone doesn’t consent to something, back off. No questions asked. If you take one thing away from this article, let it be this: do not ignore or tolerate harassment, either towards yourself or others. And know that you aren’t alone: there are people out there to support you.

CULTURE Kin Korner

The most wonderful time of the year: finals season

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 22, 2017

Profile //

Droppin’ sick beats with Teen Daze Teen Daze played a cover show at Oldhand coffee shop, it was bumpin’

ALEXIA BAPTISTA & SHAUNA PEARCE CONTRIBUTORS

Kin Korner is a health and wellness column, written by students from Kinesiology 360: Concepts in Health Promotion and Health Education.

It’s that time again, the point in a semester where all students are busy studying for finals, working on group projects, or attempting to produce a well written paper within a 24-hour period, the night before it’s due. With all this going on, it’s no surprise that we find ourselves saying things like, “I’m really stressed out right now,” or “I think I might be coming down with something.” We’ve all been there.

According to a study in the Journal of Psychosomatic Research, roughly one-third of students experience heightened levels of stress during the final exam season, and less than 50 per cent of students participate in the recommended dose of daily physical activity. Knowing this, it is imperative that we pay attention to not only our mental health, but our physical health as well. Although they are different areas of wellness, they are definitely related to one another, so why not tackle both at the same time?

Stress is inevitable when it comes to being a university student. But don’t fret, there is hope!

A good place to begin is with some exercising basics. According to the Canadian Society of Exercise Physiologists, you should engage in 150 minutes of aerobic exercise per week in bouts of 10 minutes or more, three or four days a week.

Aerobic exercise can be defined as any physical activity that someone is engaged in, using large muscle groups for 10 minutes or more at the same pace. Some examples include running, walking, or cycling. These types of exercises have proven to be excellent for your health, because they directly affect your heart. At 150 minutes a week, a number of health benefits are observed, including healthy blood cholesterol levels, healthy blood pressure levels, as well as a lower resting heart rate.

While 150 minutes is the goal, the more aerobic exercise you engage in, the better.

Coincidentally, stress is also something that, through hormone release, affects your cardiovascular system. Stressors, such as the ones you face on a day-to-day basis, have the power to increase your blood pressure, heart rate, and cholesterol levels, which are all the same factors helped by cardiovascular exercise.

As for psychological benefits, exercise has been shown to improve cognitive functioning, as well as help combat mental health issues such as anxiety and depression. A study from the Journal of Psychosomatic Research found that university students who participated in the most exercise reported being less stressed, and had lower levels of depressive symptoms.

Researchers from Southern Illinois University also found that exercise increased positive emotion, unity of mind and body, self-esteem, problem-focused coping, and health behaviour regulation in students who participated in regular exercise three or four times a week. All students agreed that exercise, whether it be aerobic, weight lifting, or yoga, helped with reducing stress, which in turn helped their overall mood and well-being.

Regular physical activity can also help with sleeping patterns and your social relationships as well. In other words, you will most likely become happier, healthier, and more confident.

Living holistically is essential to ensure you have a healthy mind and body connection, and to ease yourself through life’s stressors. Especially when you’re a student during crunch time, it is essential to maintain this balance, to ensure you don’t lose your marbles before the semester is done.

Do yourselves a favour, and make time in your busy life to run around the track, or walk your dog for 30 minutes, because it’s more valuable to your health than you think.

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Photo: Facebook

CAT FRIESEN COPY EDITOR

On the night of Wednesday, November 15, Oldhand, a bustling coffee shop in the middle of downtown Abbotsford, was packed with energetic patrons there to enjoy a DJ set by Abbotsford’s Teen Daze. Candles were lit, the lights were dimmed, and guests enjoyed a specialized menu of starters, local beer and wine, and handcrafted cocktails, while Teen Daze played a cover set behind the bar.

Before the show, we sat down with Jamison Isaak, the man behind Teen Daze’s ambient, soothing sound, to talk inspiration, influences, and weird tour experiences.

Why did you start making music?

I grew up with a lot of music and instruments around the house. My dad was a musician, my mom always sang in choirs, and they were both big music fans in general, so it felt very natural. I was always intrigued by music, and was a nerd about discovering new music.

From a young age, I grew up watching Much Music. I went through the alternative music era, it was always around me, and I was always fascinated by it. It felt like a very natural progression to then get into a place where I started making it myself. Like I said, it was a very natural thing.

Who inspires you, and why?

These days, I’ve been listening to a lot of ambient and new age music. I’ve always liked instrumental music in general, something that doesn’t necessarily rely on lyrics or vocals in order to dictate where a song is going to go, or how it feels. I always really liked music that could create a really specific vibe, but not say “this is what this is.” Like, Brian Eno, or Ashra, a German, new-age art-rock band from the ‘70s that I’ve been listening to a lot. Any music that can create a real vibe, specifically, or the melodies. Those are more recent influences, but when I first started, I was writing more acoustic folk music, so I was really influenced by early-2000s emo music, where everyone gets their start. And before that, growing up watching Much Music, I would see Daft Punk music videos all the time. I was obsessed with Daft Punk, I thought they were the weirdest, most intriguing people in the world. Even to this day, when I set out to make dance music, they’re always the touchstone.

When did you first go on tour?

Were you nervous at all?

Oh yeah, definitely. Especially because so much of the project was about experimenting and recording, and studio work, so the idea of “How do I present this to people, how do I put together a captivating show?” Especially at the time, I hadn’t seen anyone be a solo electronic artist doing a live show. I had a couple examples, but they were just from watching YouTube videos. I didn’t know how to use the different devices [that they were using], how do I get my hands on something like that? I was nervous to not screw up, to do things that people would like. It’s taken time to come into my own, to do something I’m really happy with. The first show, the hype of it, was so much fun. Even though there was some nervousness, it usually fueled having more fun on stage. There was a greater release.

What’s been your weirdest tour experience?

There’s lots. Touring is a weird thing. The weirdest was definitely in 2011, I went to New York to play a festival, and a lot of shows get booked really late in the night because I think they assumed that because this festival is happening, everyone is more inspired to stay out until three or four in the morning. I was playing a showcase that had me on stage at 1 a.m., and I remember thinking “Okay that’s late, but it’s not too bad,” and due to whatever circumstances, earlier bands were late to get to their set, and mine just got pushed back further and further. I ended up going on stage at 3 a.m., and no one was there. Everyone had gone home. The only people left were wasted. A guy jumped on stage while I was playing, and started rapping into a mic that was on stage. I was so pissed, and I kept looking at him, like “just get him out of here,” I was just trying to do my thing. But there’s tons, every tour, there’s something that you just shake your head at, like, “This is so weird.”

Is there anything else you want to add?

Listen to the new record. I release everything myself, so, when you stream my music on Spotify or Apple Music, there’s real financial purpose to that. Don’t think it’s just a drop in the bucket, I’m truly a very independent artist. Every time I get an email from Bandcamp, I’m excited, that’s going straight to my PayPal. I appreciate it.

You can find Teen Daze on Soundcloud, Bandcamp, Spotify, Apple Music, and on their website, www.teendaze.com.

My first proper tour, where I crossed provincial lines, This interview was edited for style and lenght. was 2008. A friend of mine is a singer/songwriter, and he needed someone to come play in his band, so I was hired to do that. The first Teen Daze tour I did was in 2010. I graduated in April, and then went on tour that summer.

CULTURE

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 22, 2017

Play Preview //

UFV Theatre presents: The Bear

Photo: UFV Flickr

JOEL ROBERTSON-TAYLOR EDITOR-IN-CHIEF

In one act, just 45 minutes, UFV’s theatre department hopes to hit the short and sweet mark with their 2017/18 season kickoff play, The Bear.

Written by Anton Chekhov, The Bear is a short comedy about a young widow who, on the seven-month anniversary of her husband’s death, has her mourning obnox-

iously interrupted by a landowner named Smirnov; apparently, the deceased owes Smirnov a lot of money. Both their stubbornness, hers to not pay, his to get paid, evolves into arguments about love and gender.

“I’ll stay for a year. I’m going to get my own, my dear! You don’t get at me with your widow’s weeds and your dimpled cheeks! I know those dimples,” Smirnov announces.

Insulted, and seemingly unaware of contemporary gender conventions, Smirnov challenges the mourning Popova to a duel.

Student director, Noel Funk, said his goal with the play is to emphasis the humour within it, as well as make it a spectacle to watch.

“I don’t actually like watching theatre, so when I direct, one of my biggest things is to make it into something that I’d want to watch,” Funk said. “That’s what I’ve been

spending these rehearsals doing: I’ve been shifting it, and stylizing it into something that I’d want to see.”

The Bear will run Nov. 22 – Dec. 1, with matinees at 11:30 a.m., and evening performances at 4:30 p.m.

“The idea with our run times starting at 11:30 and 4:30 is that students can come in between classes, or before and after classes, and just drop in and watch, because it’s a pay what you can at the door,” said Funk.

“We’re hoping to just have random people come in and see a show.”

Though written over 100 years ago, The Bear touches on very relevant issues like sexism. Smirnov, for one, is a very sexist man. But Funk enjoys twisting the audiences’ emotions. “I’m really, really excited to just see how many nerves I can hit.”

‘New space’ This is the first UFV Theatre show to be on stage at the Abbotsford campus since the department’s move from the UFV Chilliwack North campus in September, and they’ve had far more challenges than usual this year.

“This is the space UFV gave us, and it’s pretty dinky. What can you do?” said Funk. “This place cannot be a permanent theatre space.”

Funk said that although the space is limiting, the cast and crew has worked within its confines. Some of the new issues include not enough performance space, not enough audience space, and no catwalk.

“The educational opportunities are also lessened quite a fair bit,” Funk added.

Regardless, Funk said he’s excited to see the play come together. “One thing about directing is you have no idea what it’s going to look like until it happens.” He also hopes that the new location will encourage more non-theatre students to get involved with shows.

Exhibit //

Young Artists “Emerge” into the art industry CASSIE DE JONG CULTURE & EVENTS EDITOR

On Thursday, November 16, at 6:30 p.m., artists and art enthusiasts from across the Fraser Valley gathered at the Reach Gallery Museum in Abbotsford for the opening reception of Art on Demand 3.4, an exhibition created by members of the Reach’s Emerge program.

The exhibition was curated by UFV visual arts student, and president of the Visual Arts Student Association (VASA), Katherine Searle, whom we had a chance to interview.

When asked if it was difficult to choose from the long list of applicants, Searle stated, “At first, yes, when listing all of the themes from the works, looking for common threads. I made lists under a few different themes, before deciding on childhood.” Searle was drawn to two artists in particular, as she thought their work would relate to one another. “It was after choosing childhood as my overall theme that I felt strongly that the works of Jessica Peatman and Kristin Voth would work well together. Their work relates well together because of the use of the strong emotions felt by the figures in each of their series.”

CONTINUED ON PAGE 12

Photo: Cassie de Jong

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CULTURE

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 22, 2017

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 11 Langley artist Jessica Peatman graduated from UFV with a Bachelor of Fine Arts in June of 2017. She continues to study at UFV through directed studies in printmaking, to sharpen her skills in that medium. Peatman’s work represents feeling of loneliness, fear, and uncertainty associated with memories of childhood. Her pieces in this exhibition are part of her series titled “Reconstructed Recollections,” a collection of photo-etched prints. These prints contain imagery comparable to children’s books illustrations, containing cartoonish figures and simple structures.

Vancouver-based artist Kristin Voth is a mixed media artist who has roots in Abbotsford. Her work often features the small things commonly overlooked by many.

Themes she addresses include recollection, alienation, and promise. Her paintings in this exhibition are based on

pictures taken from her childhood. She uses pastel colours and greys to expertly resemble the likeness of old photographs, which can be interpreted as a substitute for memories. The children in her imagery engage in fun activities such as bike riding, or birthday parties, however, their facial expressions are devoid of all emotion, which evokes an uncomfortable sense of dissonance.

Both artists portray aspects of childhood in their work that are inspired by past experiences easily forgotten by adults. Together, the artists effectively compel their audience to recollect the hardships of childhood in a way that elicits discomfort and uneasiness.

Searle, Peatman, and Voth are all involved in the Reach’s Emerge program. The goal of the Emerge program is to provide training and mentorship to aspiring young professionals with an interest in the arts. A list of opportunities are available to individuals who choose to participate in the Emerge program, including the opportunity to curate

Cascade Events Calendar November - December

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Upcycle Your Dusty Gems @ Chilliwack Cultural Centre, 6:00 - 9:00 p.m.

Colour Mixology: Acrylic Paints @ Chilliwack Community Arts Council, 6:30 - 8:30 p.m.

Reflections of Art: A Staged Hair Show @ Abbotsford Arts Centre, 6:15 p.m.

UFV International Holiday Party @ the Rancho (Abbotsford), 5:00 - 10:00 p.m.

Note: Some of these events require tickets, most are on Facebook. If something catches your eye, take to the internet for more details.

The Cascade’s EGM @ The Cascade office in the Student Union Building (Abbotsford Campus), 2:30 - 4:30 p.m. FREE PIZZA!

group exhibitions, and the ability to show work alongside professional artists. The program believes in the importance of hands-on experience, and offers both paid and volunteer positions for aspiring individuals looking to enter the fine arts industry. A membership fee of $25 is required when signing up for the program, which includes a full year of the aforementioned benefits.

For students who may be interested in undertaking projects such as the ones available to young people through the Emerge program, Searle advises that, “While in school, take advantage of every opportunity you can, even if you feel you have a lot on your plate. If you want something bad enough, you will be able to find the time.”

Art on Demand 3.4 will be on display at the Reach Gallery Museum until December 31, 2017.

Christmas Celebration @ The Indigenous Student Centre, SUB Room S1113 (Abbotsford Campus), 11:30 a.m. - 1:30 p.m.

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Winter FUNderland: a 24-Hour Gaming Marathon for SUS Angel Tree @ Evered Hall (Abbotsford Campus), 10:00 a.m. - 10:00 a.m. the following day Body, Wine, Jewels! Workshop @ Chilliwack Cultural Centre, 6:00 - 9:00 p.m.

Folio Thinking @ Room G113 (Abbotsford Campus), 10:30 - 11:30 a.m.

Visual Arts Department: Christmas Print Sale @ Library Rotunda, Room G102 (Abbotsford Campus), 11:00 a.m. - 3:00 p.m.

Candlelight Parade @ Lougheed Highway (Mission), 7:30 - 10:30 p.m.

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Surviving TRUMP: A Lecture by Gwynne Dyer @ Evered Hall (Abbotsford Campus), 3:30 p.m.

Malk, The Eleven Twelves, Super Distorter, Nice @ Captain’s Cabin Pub (Mission), 8:00 p.m.

Visual Arts Department: Christmas Print Sale @ Library Rotunda, Room G102 (Abbotsford Campus), 1:00 - 5:00 p.m.

Fraser Valley Filth @ The Vineyard (Chilliwack), 7:00 - 10:30 p.m.

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Random Dander, China Syndrome, and Pete’s Arcade @ Captain’s Cabin Pub (Mission), 8:00 p.m. - Midnight Tree Lighting Ceremony @ Salish Park (Chilliwack), 5:00 - 7:00 p.m.

Exit 123 @ The Well (Chilliwack), 9:00 - 11:00 p.m.

Fraser Valley Music Awards (FVMA) Battle of the Bands Semi-Finals @ The Stage in Mission, 7:00 p.m.

Toys for Tots Christmas Breakfast @ Quality Hotel & Conference Centre (Abbotsford), 6:00 - 9:30 a.m.

Sailing to Byzantium @ Evered Hall (Abbotsford Campus), 4:00 - 6:30 p.m.

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Maan Farms 3rd Annual Christmas Market @ Maan Farms (Abbotsford), 10:00 a.m.

3rd Annual Movember Dodgeball Tournament @ Heritage Park Middle School (Mission), 4:30 - 7:00 p.m.

Movember Pub Night / Dodgeball After Party @ The Stage in Mission, 7:00 - 10:00 p.m.

Fraser Valley Music Awards at Abbyfest (Battle of the Bands Finale) @ Abbotsford Centre, 10:00 a.m. - 4:00 p.m.

Abbyfest Ft. Glass Tiger, With Special Guests Chilliwack & Sass Jordan @ Abbotsford Centre, 7:00 p.m.

Jerry Seinfeld @ Abbotsford Centre, 7:30 - 10:30 p.m.

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Winter Jubilee Marketplace @ Essendene Ave and Gladys Ave (Abbotsford Downtown), 4:00 - 9:00 p.m.

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Abbotsford Education & Career Fair @ Tradex (Abbotsford), 9:00 a.m. 2:00 p.m.

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Brewing Workshop @ Royals Kombucha Brew House (Chilliwack), 3:00 - 4:30 p.m.

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Opening Reception: Reworked and Reassembled @ Kariton Art Gallery (Abbotsford), 6:00 - 8:00 p.m.

Play: The Nutcracker @ Abbotsford Arts Centre, 1:00 p.m. and 4:00 p.m.

Maan Farms 3rd Annual Christmas Market @ Maan Farms (Abbotsford), 10:00 a.m.

SUS Talks: Racism & White Fragility @ Evered Hall (Abbotsford Campus), 3:00 p.m.

Film Production Info Session @ The Reach (Abbotsford), 5:30 - 6:30 p.m.

Writing for Film + Television Info Session @ The Reach (Abbotsford), 5:30 - 6:30 p.m.

Christmas Open House @ Trethewey House (Abbotsford), 1:00 - 4:00 p.m.

National Day of Remembrance, and Action on Violence Against Women - All Day December Corks & Canvas @ Chilliwack Community Arts Council, 7:00 9:00 p.m.

O Christmas Tea: A British Comedy @ Chilliwack Cultural Centre, doors 7:00 p.m.

Rockabilly Jay & the Cadillac Bones @ Captain’s Cabin Pub (Mission), 8:30 p.m. - 1:00 a.m.

People Photography @ Chilliwack Cultural Centre, 1:00 - 4:00 p.m.

O Christmas Tea: A British Comedy @ Chilliwack Cultural Centre, doors 7:00 p.m.

All Ages Punk Show: Cloaca, CDP, Like Bears, The Schatzis, and Rain Penner @ The Vineyard (Chilliwack), 6:00 - 10:00 p.m.

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Hillary Clinton Live @ Vancouver Convention Centre 11:00 a.m. - 12:45 p.m.

Hanging Terrarium workshop @ Meadowland Flowers (Chilliwack), 10:00 a.m. - 1:00 p.m.

Abbotsford Children’s Theatre: Anne of Green Gables @ Matsqui Centennial Auditorium (Abbotsford), 3:30 p.m.

Ugly Christmas Sweater DJ Dance Party @ The Stage in Mission, 10:00 p.m. - 1:00 a.m.

ARTS

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 22, 2017

Album Review //

CHARTS

SHUFFLE

1

DESTROYER ken

AARON LEVY

2

PAINTED FRUITS PF II

3

ESMERINE Mechanics of Dominion

4

WEAVES Wide Open

Whilst enjoying poetry last night at the brand new poetry facility in historic old downtown beautiful Abbotsford, or wherever, I heard a new song that turns one of my guiltiest pleasures of the ‘90s into yet an even more prohibitive and unlistenable experience.

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FAITH HEALER Try ;-)

Train — “Drops of Jupiter”

6

BRUTAL POODLE Long Time No See

7

DAVID MYLES Real Love

8

WARES Wares

9

USSE 231

10

JOHN WELSH Vamonos Mi Chica

11

TOUGH AGE Shame

12

WHITE HOT JET YYJ

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ARIEL PINK Dedicated to Bobby Jameson

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MAUNO Tuning

15

SOUND DOWN Dino Droppings

16

SICK BOSS Sick Boss

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SUPERSONIC BLUES MACHINE Californisoul

18

CANNIBAL CORPSE Red Before Black

19

LEMON BUCKET ORKESTRA If I Had the Strength

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EXPLODED VIEW Summer Came Early

Angel Olsen’s Phases a suiting companion to My Woman

HARD WORKING DUDE

The original single that put those of us listening to soft rock/pop radio in the ‘90s onto the night train to Train land with this Southernrock oriented, soft-serve styled selection of feel-good melodies, lyrics, and thoughts of the ethereal world of songwriting and performance.

Train — “Heart and Soul” Bruno Mars? Daniel Bedingfield?

Daniel Powter? I could’ve guessed a hundred different artists when I first heard this atrocious rendition of the song my cousins and grandmother would team up to play, just like yours, every family get-together. Never would’ve thought it was a Train song, though, no way.

Daniel Powter — “Had A Bad Day” Train? Train! Train, Train, and/or maybe instead of those, it was Train. But, no! I was sure of it, and still can’t really believe it’s not. So, this song was not a Train song! It’s by someone completely different!

This is the only song anyone’s ever heard by him.

Daniel Bedingfield — “Gotta Get Through This” Now, Daniel is not a part of Train, nor is his music actually very easily confused with theirs, however, the band with the name like a locomotive did tour with Natasha, who shares a last name and a bloodline with Daniel, whose 2001 song, itemized here, is actually kinda catchy.

MARTIN CASTRO ARTS EDITOR

The follow-up to 2016’s My Woman takes Angel Olsen in a surprisingly new direction. The polished, reverb-heavy finish that gave Olsen’s My Woman such gravitas is (almost shockingly) entirely missing from Phases. In its stead, Olsen turns to a stripped-down, acoustic delivery.

Electronic influences aren’t missing from the record entirely. In fact, the bluesy “Special,” with its slow, hazy buildup, is one of the more compelling tracks on the record. But the instances where Olsen shines most on Phases are reserved to tracks wherein she is at her most withdrawn.

“Only With You” unfolds slowly over a muted blues riff akin to Leonard Cohen’s “Hallelujah,” and for the simplicity of its lyrics delivers a more vulnerable performance than was apparent on My Woman. Olsen’s turn to folk conventions pay off tenfold on “All Right Now.” While most of the tracks on Phases lack the energy of her earlier releases, Olsen makes up for the minimalist production with what is probably the most committed, emotionally-vulnerable vocal performance of her career to date.

If her delivery wasn’t as compelling, Phases would be entirely too self-indulgent to be palatable.

As it stands, however, Olsen wins the listener over, time and time again. Case in point: “Sweet Dreams” gives us every indication of being the kind of halfhearted Jefferson Airplane knock-off that bands with female vocalists will oftentimes attempt.

The moment she starts singing, Olsen proves us wrong. Not only is the track a refreshingly sober take on the “confession of love through heartache” trope, it’s also belligerent in the way Hendrix was

belligerent: Olsen knows damn well she’s got it down — why be humble about it?

The soft-spoken acoustic ballad “California” puts every acoustic singer-songwriter this side of Simon and Garfunkel’s “Bridge Over Troubled Water” to shame. Sure, there’s a much more pronounced country twang in “California” than Art and Paul ever exhibited, but Olsen’s delivery is immediately moving. Like most of the tracks on Phases, “California” is stripped-down and solely acoustic, which, instead of limiting Olsen, gives her the opportunity to highlight her vocals directly. (An opportunity she doesn’t fail to exploit to its fullest again and again on this record.)

The short-but-sweet “For You” will (take my word for it) become one of those ubiquitous independentmovie soundtrack staples that catapult artists into relative fame based on one performance. (Luckily for potential viewers, Olsen’s no one-hit-wonder.)

Here’s the thing, none of these songs will get syndicated radio airtime. (None of them are upbeat pop carbon-copies.) The real pity in this is that songs like “May as Well” outdo every major commercial love song. Every single one is rendered irrelevant by Olsen’s crooning: “I’ll never forget you all of my life.”

2016’s My Woman had one lacklustre track on it: “Sister” — a track which didn’t fail by any standard, it just paled slightly in comparison to the other nine on the record.

Phases avoids this by getting it right every time.

I’m not saying there are no bad songs on Phases.

I’m saying each song commands such rapt attention, so violently engenders tenderness, that no one track surpasses another.

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ARTS

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 22, 2017

Movie Review //

Murder on the Orient Express is a wasted opportunity

LAUREL LOGAN FEATURES EDITOR

Since the release of her classic 1934 novel, Agatha Christie’s Murder on the Orient Express has been adapted as television shows, computer games, radio shows, and of course, movies. Now, 43 years after its original cinematic debut, comes a remake that doesn’t do much more than simply recycle what every other adaptation has already done.

Decorated with a mustache that nearly embodies a character of its own, Kenneth Branagh directs and stars as the the famous detective Hercule Poirot. We are first introduced to Mr. Poirot in Istanbul, where he is in the midst of wrapping up another case. The sole purpose of this lengthy introduction seems to only drive home two main points: he has one heck of an eye for detail, and he’s weirdly picky about the symmetry of his breakfast eggs; only one of which seems relevant to the

storyline (I’ll let you guess which one), and still wastes too much time in the beginning on something that could have been woven into the plot more organically as it progressed.

After much delay, Mr. Poirot finally arrives on the train where the real action begins to play out. Here, we meet 11 new characters, all with very distinct looks, and interesting personalities. Shortly into their trip, the train derails as a result of an avalanche, leaving the passengers stranded. More significantly, they find that one of the passengers, Mr. Ratchett (played

by Johnny Depp) had been murdered in his cabin at some point during the night.

Naturally, Mr. Poirot appoints himself as head of the case, and begins to interview each one of the passengers in pursuit of the killer, before they strike again.

Aesthetically, the snow-coated mountains that surround the train look crisp and serene — especially against the pastel sunsets that creep just above the roof

of the train. The train itself is opulent, but not over-the-top, and creates an interesting environment for the characters to interact in. The narrow corridors of the train also allow for unique filming angles, often being shot from high angles, or through glass, which creates beautiful double-vision reflections within the scenes.

Though each character is distinctly their own, there is little to no character development throughout the film. This works for the most part, in that it helps to create an air of mystery about the characters, so as to not give away the ending. However, there is plenty of room to give Mr. Poirot a richer backstory, and to offer something new that previous adaptations hadn’t done; yet this adaptation doesn’t bother to do so.

The clues and interviews leading up to the final reveal of the murderer are moderately intriguing, but don’t quite feel built up enough to leave the audience gobsmacked when we do find out who the killer is. When Mr. Poirot finally does explain

exactly how the murder was committed, it feels rushed. A longer, more detailed explanation could have brought more interesting nuances to a story that is begging to be revived; but again, it didn’t bother.

Though enjoyable, Murder on the Orient Express plays it way too safe. Certainly, after 43 years, this story deserves a fresher and deeper perspective. Whether you’re familiar with the story or not, this remake just feels lazy. Having already been adapted numerous times, this feels like a wasted opportunity, where they should have taken more risks with the plot and its characters.

Do yourself a favour, and leave this movie at the station; but, if you’re really itching for a well-done murder-mystery, turn on something like Clue, The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, or pretty much any Alfred Hitchcock movie.

Podcast Review //

Audiobooks finally get it right with Alice Isn’t Dead

MARTIN CASTRO ARTS EDITOR

The first audiobook I experienced was Dan Brown’s The Da Vinci Code. The book had (regrettably) come pre-loaded on an mp3 player I bought sometime in 2005. I don’t think I got through the first chapter before giving the entire format up as possibly the worst way of consuming stories. (This might have had something to do with the fact that The Da Vinci Code just wasn’t that great a book but, overall, audiobooks tend to lean away from quality, or so I’ve experienced.)

Alice Isn’t Dead is as much an audiobook as it is a fiction podcast (which means that it’s released episodically). Truck driver Keisha (voiced by Jasika Nicole) calls out to a woman named Alice through her dispatch radio while driving across the U.S. The story progresses as a confessional of sorts, and we realize that Keisha has been using her job as a truck driver to scour the country, looking for her wife after Alice’s disappearance some months back.

As she begins to piece together the information left behind by Alice after her disappearance, Keisha encounters a man at a station. His skin hangs loose from his bones in some parts, and stretches over them in others. He smells like damp earth, and his teeth

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are sharp. He wears a shirt with a word on the breast pocket: thistle.

At this point, I think it’s only fair to warn would-be listeners of Alice Isn’t Dead that, although the genre of the story (for the most part) follows mystery tropes, there are some very striking, distinct horror elements.

Few and far between, these horror elements are nigh unforgettable. Such as a man having a chunk of his neck bitten off in a slow, cruel attempt on the part of an antagonist to make a point: stop looking for Alice.

The story itself unfolds slowly, and for the majority of the episodes we, along with Keisha, attempt to make sense of the increasingly nonsensical details regarding Alice’s disappearance, all while Keisha herself is subjected to a series of interactions that would be noir-detective tropes if it weren’t for the ever-present threat of the “Thistle Men,” which slowly pick away at the mystery-genre mask the podcast starts out with, revealing a story that’s more horror than anything.

The only gripe I have with the story is that at times it progresses too slowly, leaving listeners wondering when the next step forward will come. This might simply be because of its medium. Some scenes can’t convey information visually, and so instances of blindness on the part of the listener are sometimes quite apparent. Mostly though, these are acknowledged, and used

to further ratchet up the tension in the story, which simmers throughout both seasons of Alice Isn’t Dead.

Without spoiling it, I’ll tell you that if conspiracy theories and small-town murder mysteries are your thing, buckle up, because Alice Isn’t Dead will probably have you at the edge of your seat.

ARTS

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 22, 2017

Scene Review //

Christmas movie filmed in the SUB airs The Christmas movie arrived on Hallmark Movies and Mysteries recently, and we watched (part of) it so you don’t have to

Back in June, the Student Union Building (SUB) at UFV’s Abbotsford campus was taken over for a day while a movie crew shot a scene for a film. The SUB was decorated to look like an airport during the holidays, and while students walked past and whispered speculations about what was being filmed, the large, professional crew crafted a single scene in the Hallmark Movies & Mysteries (formerly Hallmark Movie Channel) original film Engaging Father Christmas. The film premiered on November 12, and The Cascade immediately found the scene featuring our campus. We’ve asked several of our writers to view the single, three-and-a-half minute long scene (which is available for viewing at ufvcascade.ca) featuring the SUB, and to share their thoughts on the results of that long day’s work.

Cat I have to admit, I love a good “bad” movie.

Awkward line deliveries and inappropriate emphasis are my jam — if you’ve ever seen The Room, you know what I’m talking about. Unfortunately, Engaging Santa Clause is not the kind of “bad” I’m into — there’s no comedy here, only disappointment. If the the few minutes that were filmed in UFV’s SUB are any indication, this film as a whole falls flat.

From the clip that I viewed, there’s not anything unique about Engaging Santa Clause. The same generic Christmas season “we’ve been apart too long and I love and miss you” plot, the same generic, poorly delivered, sappy dialogue, and the same generic heterosexual love story.

I only watched a three-and-a-half minute clip, and let me tell you, things got wild. The plot moved from Miranda talking on the phone to her boyfriend, to Miranda running into an old ex-boyfriend, Josh, to Josh being a bit snarky (frankly, I would have said “bye boy” at this point), to Miranda revealing to Josh that her father that she never knew was a famous actor, to a mysterious man randomly bumping into Miranda’s suitcase (I sure hope they explain this better later in the movie), to Josh awkwardly kissing Miranda on the cheek, which of course Miranda’s new boyfriend is lucky enough to see — it wouldn’t be a Christmas romance without a little drama.

But, you see why I’m a little overwhelmed; the viewer gets a boatload of information in only a few minutes. There’s no subtlety, no art to it.

Now, I understand that the majority of moviegoers enjoy romance and Christmas movies, but honestly, if directors insist on regurgitating the same love story over and over and over, give me some LGBT+ content, some people of colour, or some weird events or subplots that distract us, if only for a little while, from the fact that we’re watching the same movie that we’ve seen hundreds of times over.

Verdict: I’d rather eat tinsel than watch this movie

Joel: After the scene opens on a shot of Miranda descending the stairs into a crowd of stranded travellers, she (by happenstance, orchestrated by the spirit Ariel) reacquaints herself with an old friend.

Miranda, in an attempt to deceive King Alonso of Naples’ son, Ferdinand, rattles off a story about her long lost father, and his recent death. In actuality, Prospero is alive and well, and is single-handedly responsible for King Alonso and his flight crew’s stranding at the Boston Logan Airport.

Miranda’s false love interest, Ian, whom she full on smooches after Ferdinand leaves to attend royal business, is actually Caliban, Sycorax’s son, and a deformed monster. He hides his identity with a hex.

Prospero and Alonso are brothers, but Alonso is a very bad boy.

Alonso usurped power from Prospero, and Prospero’s only hope at regaining control of the kingdom is to pair his daughter with the son of his brother — how romantic.

From this scene alone, we see the reimagining of a classic tale. Although Engaging Father Christmas veers from the original source material, it successfully conveys the depth of deception, and showcases true human nature.

Verdict: In the true Shakespearean scene analysis tradition, I didn’t actually watch most of this scene.

shot of a suitcase flopping onto a carousel, followed by a ridiculous amount of extras pulling suitcases back and forth in the SUB main atrium. Tah dah, now for all intents and purposes, the SUB has become an airport, with only a micro budget, and a couple of extras.

This scene is clearly meant for TV. You could swap channels, and come across this clip and keep watching without having seen the first 45 minutes of the film. Consider this film the “Harlequin Romance” brand of film production. Cheap, quick, and people eat it up like it’s their last day in the chocolate factory.

Verdict: The quality of the filmmaking reminds me of the cookie cutters they use to make gingerbread men around this time of year.

Jeff: Do you like ex position?

Engaging Father Christmas likes exposition! It likes it so much, that in this scene, it shoves the exposition right into your face, with absolutely no concept of subtext or subtlety. The scene shows two characters as Miranda Chester is spotted, and conveniently greeted using her full name, by Josh no-surname-given. The two sit down to talk about a past relationship between them, and mince no words as they blatantly remind the audience of what happened in their past.

“Oh yeah, that’s right,” says Josh, smiling like a loon as he spits out the words rapidMitch: fire, “it was just after Christmas, the year This scene is constructed right out of a text- before last, we decided we should uh…” book. The characters introduce the back- he pauses as if it’s awkward, but doesn’t ground and history of their relationship seem at all troubled. “...Take a break,” Mithrough back and forth expository, yet not randa Chester finishes for him. Josh nods. too far out of place dialogue. Their faces are “It was all very civilized, as I recall.” And blank canvases for their expressions, the that phrase, “as I recall” really sums up the shots are empty behind them — empty for scene. Because Josh says those words again two reasons: 1. it’s cheaper that way (net- right after, along with such choice exposiwork TV is a dying industry, after all), and tion dump favourites as “do you remem2. so you aren’t distracted from the bland ber?” and “of course, you said…” to remind faces of the actors which are relaying half Miranda Chester of details she absolutely of the information of the scene. would not need reminding of, just for the The cinematography — it hurts to use benefit of the audience. this word to reference the camera work in Yes, this is a made-for-TV movie, so yes, this film — of the film breaks down like they likely didn’t have time to get perforcookie cutter TV: wide, reverse wide, me- mances that everyone involved felt were dium close up once they greet, close up shot perfect, or to decorate the set in as much once some sort of tension rises, and then a detail as a Hollywood movie might, but wide of the conversation to release tension. c’mon. This is the script. Someone wrote Rinse, and repeat. this, and decided the best way to convey The editor also used classic, basic film this information was in the most straighttechnique to establish that the SUB really is forward, unnuanced dialogue that explican airport for viewers. Stock footage shows itly states the backstory. The same number a plane landing, followed by stock footage of words could have conveyed the exact

same information in any number of more dramatic ways.

Verdict: The movie might be Engaging Father Christmas, but the scene sure wasn’t engaging me.

Martin: The movie recently filmed in part at the SUB in Abbotsford is a terrifying surrealist masterpiece. Miranda, the main character, must grapple with what’s clearly a dissociative break from reality. She walks down a staircase and enters her own conscience, which manifests itself as a room filled with people carrying suitcases. These travelers symbolize the fleeting, momentary nature of Miranda’s cognitive stability — they are ready to jump ship at any second. Miranda carries no luggage, of course. Instead, it is waiting for her when she sits down at a table. In a metaphor that is perhaps a bit too on-the-nose, we’re shown that any suitcase would serve her: all the luggage shown is Miranda’s luggage.

It is only in this fugue state that Miranda can converse with “Josh”— a man she thinks is a friend from the past, but is obviously an extension of her own psyche (one she must confront if she is to free herself from the shackles of insanity). Asking him to keep it a secret, Miranda tells Josh that she has found her (now-dead) estranged “father.”

As she says his name, “James Whitcomb,” a bell rings. This bell constitutes a motif of rare introspection on Miranda’s part as she inches closer to the truth: her fabricated father, James Whitcomb, is an actor, a masked man. Miranda’s subconscious is screaming at her: stop acting, face reality, or you will soon meet the same fate as Whitcomb!

Reaching an agreement with “Josh” not to divulge the secret to anybody, Miranda continues down the self-destructive path of denying herself the truth: Whitcomb’s existence is merely a ploy meant to keep her from realizing the extent to which her mind has shattered.

When her “boyfriend” (an undisputable personification of escapism) arrives, Miranda’s luggage has disappeared, and she runs to him before exiting the building. She leaves her fugue state having abandoned the suitcase (the only tangible remnants of her sanity) and, in an ending with horrifying implications, embraces him and the escapist hallucinatory highway that will no doubt drive her too far away from her sanity for recovery to ever be possible.

In a daring move, Hallmark has confirmed our long-held suspicions with the release of Engaging Father Christmas, its uncompromising artistic manifesto. With this film, Hallmark has finally outed itself as the post-modernist collective of fundamentally nihilist, surrealist masterminds we all suspected (and feared) that they were.

Verdict: Christmas comes but once a year, it’s true, but artistic genius like this comes but once a lifetime.

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