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OCTOBER 26, 2017 | The Florida Jewish Home


The Florida Jewish Home | OCTOBER 26, 2017

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OCTOBER 26, 2017 | The Florida Jewish Home

The Week In News

Where Have All the Bugs Gone?

A study has found that the amount of insets in Germany is declining at “dramatic” and “alarming” rates. Researchers say that their findings may have a huge impact on the crop production and natural ecosystems around the globe. PLOS One, a study journal, published the report that says that over the past 27 years Germany’s nature reserves have seen a 75% decrease in its flying insect population. “The flying insect community as a whole...has been decimated over the last few decades,” said the study, which was

conducted by Researchers from Radboud University in the Netherlands and the Entomological Society Krefeld in Germany. Co-author Caspar Hallman said he and his colleagues were “very, very surprised” by the results. “These are not agricultural areas, these are locations meant to preserve biodiversity, but still we see the insects slipping out of our hands,” he noted. One of the more concerning aspects of the study is that it was not looking at a specific type of insect. The broad view taken by the study shows a decline in the entire insect population. Tanya Latty, a research and teaching fellow in entomology at Sydney University’s School of Life and Environmental Sciences, explained that the study is worrisome because “if you see these sort of dramatic declines in protected areas it makes me worry that this (trend) could be everywhere,” she said.  “There’s no reason to think this isn’t happening everywhere,” she added.

UN Formally Accused of AntiSemitism While the United Nations is intended to be impartial to any country or religion, a new report suggests otherwise. According to the report by Human Rights Voic-

es, a UN watchdog organization, the UN has supported and endorsed dozens of hate groups which use the legitimacy the UN gives them to spread anti-Semitic propaganda against the Jewish people and the Jewish State. The report states: “Accredited non-governmental organizations have been allowed to flaunt the core of the UN mission by advocating terror and intolerance. At the same time, they have been permitted to draw closer to the world of international diplomacy and gain access to the international media platforms associated with it.”

It continues: “Most striking for an organization founded on the ashes of the Holocaust, the UN enables its accredited NGOs to play a central role in promoting modern anti-Semitism. Although the preamble of the UN Charter promises the equal rights of nations large and small, UN-accredited NGOs foster the destruction of the UN member state of Israel.” The testimony details several examples of anti-Semitism from UN-accredited NGOs. The report details the UN’s explicit support of the Hamas terrorist orga-

nization and terrorist attacks on Israeli citizens. They have supported comparisons between Israel, the Jewish people, and the Nazis. They have even denied Israel’s right to exist. In the past the UN has made claims that the Talmud is “racist.” Anne Bayefsky, senior editor of Human Rights Voices, notes that many of these acts violate the UN’s own bylaws. “The United Nations was founded as a global pact among states, but over the decades – in the name of transparency and openness, and in order to further the aim of globalization – the UN has opened its doors to non-governmental organizations,” Bayefsky said. “More than 6,200 NGOs have been invited to participate on a year-round basis in UN activities, and have thus been handed a coveted global megaphone. “An examination of these NGOs, however, reveals that both by design and gross negligence on the part of UN member states, the NGOs’ ranks include bigots, anti-Semites, and terrorist advocates who are now spreading hatred and inciting violence from the world stage,” she noted. The report praised western countries, in particular the U.S., who “control the purse” of the UN, of using their influence to counter the UN’s support for anti-Semitic and pro-terror groups. Congress is already moving to deny funding to the UN as long as it supports anti-Semitic groups. The U.S. withdrew from UNESCO last week over the organization’s anti-Israel bias.

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The Florida Jewish Home | OCTOBER 26, 2017

Dear Readers,

Our Jewish Day schools serve as the backbone of our community, molding our children--the next generation-into moral, intellectual, and honest individuals. They also have the crucial role of providing them with a sound foundation in academia, an essential background to help them succeed in the future. In accordance with our 'Open House' theme, the short-focused articles you will find in this edition will relate to the spiritual, physical and emotional well-being of parents, children and teens. Additionally, you will find many 'Open House' advertisements, so please utilize the amazing options our community has to offer to find the right fit for your child where they can maximize their tremendous potential.

I hope everyone had a relaxing and enjoyable Sukkot and Holiday season spent with family and friends. Now that the Chagim have passed, and were starting to settle down and get back into the swing of things, we find ourselves starting to look ahead into the future to begin planning for next school year. Maybe some of our children will start preschool for the first time, or they may be graduating middle school and need to look for a new high school. This may be a little overwhelming, but we are here to help with this week's 'Open House' Issue, a special issue promoting the great schools of our South Florida Jewish Community. From Kindergarten to College we've got you covered. School's throughout South Florida are hosting their respective Open Houses, and parents are finding themselves faced with the decision of which school will be the most appropriate fit for their child's education. Thankfully, we have an admirable variety of choices from which to choose from, but this may make the decision even more difficult. That's why knowing what our children need and having a clear picture of what we want for our children is such an important factor when choosing a school. A good school will optimize your child's potential, nurture them to grow and enhance their daily activities.

Very Best, Dina

SENIOR EDITOR editor@thefloridajewishhome.com

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JEWISH THOUGHT Rabbi Berel Wein

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A Baby’s Universal Cry

When a mother hears her baby cry she knows what to do – no matter where she lives or where she’s from. Crying babies push the same “buttons” in their mothers’ brains regardless of their culture, a new study suggests. The research found that mothers in 11 countries tend to react the same way to their bawling child – by picking up and talking to the baby – and that the way mothers respond seems to be programmed into their brain circuits. An author of the study said he hopes the results will spur others to study brain responses in women who mistreat their children. Crying is a common trigger for abuse, said Marc Bornstein of the government’s National Institute of Child Health and Human Development in Bethesda, Maryland. The new results were released Monday by the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences. The researchers analyzed videotapes of 684 mothers in 11 countries as they interacted with their infants, who

were around 5-months-old. The observations were made in Argentina, Belgium, Brazil, Cameroon, France, Kenya, Israel, Italy, Japan, South Korea and the United States. The study showed that the mothers were likely to respond to crying by picking up and talking to the infant. But they were not likely to use other responses such as kissing, distracting, feeding or burping the child. Results were similar across the various countries. Interestingly, responses to babies’ cries are different for those who are mothers and for those who are not. “Mothers, based on their personal experience, could easily have their brains shaped in a matter of a few months to be especially sensitive” to an infant’s cry, perhaps because of hormonal changes that occur with parenting, Bornstein wrote. As such, according to Yale University researcher Linda Mayes, who did not participate in the study, it’s possible that brain development can continue beyond young adulthood, with motherhood as a key stimulus.

Britain Bans AntiIsrael Posters The British government made a good decision 100 years ago when they signed the Balfour Declaration. The declaration publicly showed Britain’s support of establishing a Jewish state. Signed on No-

vember 2, 1917 by the UK’s then-foreign secretary Arthur James Balfour, the declaration announced his government’s intention to establish “a national home for the Jewish people” in the Land of Israel. This was a huge moment in history as it is regarded as the first time that the Zionist movement received official recognition from a world power. As part of the British government’s support for Israel, they are careful to curb any anti-Israel or anti-Semitic rhetoric from public places. Media guidelines ban “images or messages which relate to matters of public controversy or sensitivity.” This fundamental law was the reason why the Transport for London blocked signs that were intended to be put up at underground stations and on buses by November 2 of this year. The poster campaign, titled “Make It Right,” was organized by the Palestinian Authority representative to the UK. The advertisements were intended to show the progression of life from 1948 in Israel to current times. Some of signage quotes the Balfour Declaration saying, “Nothing shall be done which may prejudice the civil and rights of existing non-Jewish communities in Palestine.” The photos show life in Israel before 1948 as peaceful and tranquil. It then contrasts that photo with another photo of Palestinians in pain or living in squalid condition. The Palestinian Authority did not react well to the restriction of the advertisements. Ambassador to the UK Manuel Hassassian called the ban “censorship.”

“Palestinian history is a censored history,” he said. “There has been a 100-yearlong cover-up of the British government’s broken promise, in the Balfour Declaration, to safeguard the rights of the Palestinians when it gave away their country to another people,” he said, adding that “here may be free speech in Britain on every issue under the sun but not on Palestine.” According to the report, an identical poster was permitted for display at Westminster underground station last year as a promotion for the 2017 campaign. The posters will still be permitted to be displayed on taxis, which have looser advertising rules. British Prime Minister Theresa May, in a September 2016 greeting ahead of the Jewish New Year, hailed the Balfour Declaration as an expression of the “UK’s support for the establishment of a national home for the Jewish people.” Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu is scheduled to join May at a celebratory dinner in London later this year to mark the centenary and their friendship.

Radioactive Boar in Sweden The explosion of a nuclear power plant in Chernobyl, Ukraine, in 1986 affected the surrounding region tremendously. The people in the immediate town suffered major health issues that still affect them to-

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OCTOBER 26, 2017 | The Florida Jewish Home

day. The effects of the explosions reached Belarus, Russia, the rest of Ukraine, and clouds of radioactive material even reached northern and central Sweden.

At the time, Swedes were warned against eating potentially nuclear berries and mushrooms; years later, the foods were deemed safe to consume. But now it has been discovered that there are wild boars feasting on the irradiated fruits and fungus in Sweden. Over three decades after the nuclear disaster, some plants are displaying exceptionally high levels of radioactivity, especially mushrooms that are rooted deep in the ground and have a long life. On October 5, the Swedish television channel SVT reported  that of 30 wild boar carcasses tested for radiation this year by Calluna, a local environmental consultancy, 24 showed high levels of exposure to radiation. Calluna’s Ulf Frykman recently alerted local hunters in the Gävle region, about 100 miles north of Stockholm, of “extremely high” radiation levels among local boar. “This is the highest level we’ve ever measured,” he told the Telegraph, noting one animal in particular. Frykman believes that there is just one small region that still grows deeply-rooted, nuclear mushrooms in the country’s northern territories. The boars root for food in the soil, which exposes them to the iodine and cesium-137 traces that remain in soil long after they’re gone above ground. “Wild boar root around in the earth searching for food, and all the cesium stays in the ground,” Frykman explained. “If you look at deer and elk, they eat up in the bushes and you do not have not so much cesium there.” There is a large boar population in Sweden, after suffering from almost-extinction two centuries ago. About a quarter million wild boars are estimated to live in the wilderness throughout the country, and they are commonly hunted for food and sport. Frykman expects to see more boar with extreme radiation levels as populations continue to increase and more such animals make their way north over the years. He explains that the overpopulation forces the animals to resort further afield in search of food, which can lead them to eat more mushrooms in cesium-rich areas. Farmers are concerned that this new discovery will deter people from hunting the boars which could present a problem to their crop and herds. If humans refrain from shrinking the boar population by

hunting, the population can rise to levels that would endanger the nation’s forests and crops. Eating the boar, though, according to the Swedish Radiation Safety Authority, is OK for humans. The human body has the ability to tolerate some toxins. Experts agree that some high-heat methods of cooking reduce cesium. According to Kunikazu Noguchi, a lecturer at Nihon University in Tokyo, grilling meat to a medium or medium-well state and sprinkling it with salt cuts 28% of cesium, while boiling meat has been proven to reduce cesium levels by about half.

Hungarian Honored for Saving Jews During Holocaust

A Hungarian who printed thousands of passports allowing Jews to flee the country during World War II has been honored with a memorial plaque. Emil Wiesmeyer was of the few Hungarian heroes during the Holocaust. He risked his life to save the lives of thousands of Jews fleeing during World War II by printing passports that enabled them to cross borders safely. Originally his company created 4,000 passports together with Swedish special envoy Raoul Wallenberg. Later on, he independently produced about 20,000 passports to assist Jews in making it out of Hungary. Historians estimate that 550,000 Hungarian Jews were murdered during the Holocaust. Last week, a plaque honoring Emil Wiesmeyer was unveiled in Budapest by Szabolcs Szita, director of the Holocaust Memorial Center, and Swedish Ambassador Niclas Trouve. After the war, Wiesmeyer suffered persecution and was jailed in the 1950s, during Hungary’s Communist era. Wiesmeyer died in 1967. His son Gabor attended the ceremony.

Xi Jinping, Most Powerful Leader This week Xi Jinping’s status was officially lifted by the ruling Communist

Party to China’s most powerful ruler in decades. The new position sets the stage for the authoritarian leader to tighten his grip over the country while pursuing an increasingly muscular foreign policy and military expansion.

The move to insert Xi’s name and dogma into the party’s constitution alongside the party’s founders came at the close of a twice-a-decade congress that gathered the country’s ruling elite alongside rankand-file party members. It not only places him in the first rank, with past leaders Mao Zedong and Deng Xiaoping, but also effectively makes any act of opposing him tantamount to an attack on the party itself. “The Chinese people and nation have a great and bright future ahead,” Xi told party delegates as the meeting came to a close after delegates approved the addition of Xi’s ideology of “socialism with Chinese characteristics for a new era” to the party charter. “Living in such a great era, we are all the more confident and proud, and also feel the heavy weight of responsibility upon us,” he said. The concept Xi has touted is seen as marking a break from the stage of economic reform ushered in by Deng Xiaoping in the late 1970s and continued under his successors Jiang Zemin and Hu Jintao; Xi has spoken of China emerging into a “new normal” of slower, but higher quality economic growth. The placement of Xi’s thought among the party’s leading guidelines also comes five years into his term — earlier than his predecessors. “In every sense, the Xi Jinping era has begun in earnest,” said Zhang Lifan, an independent political commentator in Beijing. “Only Mao’s name was enshrined in the party ideology while he was still alive. We’re opening something that hasn’t been broached before.” For centuries, Chinese emperors were accorded ritual names that signaled either they were successors in a dynastic line or the founders of an entirely new dynasty. What Xi accomplished this week was a modern equivalent of the latter, Zhang said. “He wants to join that pantheon of leaders,” he said. Despite being elevated to the status of both a political and theoretical authority in the party, Xi still lacks the broad popular support of the Chinese public that Mao had enjoyed, said Zhang Ming, a political analyst in Beijing who recently retired from

a prestigious university. “This (elevation) is a result of the party’s political system and not of the sincere support of the people’s hearts,” Zhang Ming said. “If he can achieve that, he would become Mao.” Xi has described his concept as central to setting China on the path to becoming a “great modern socialist country” by midcentury. His vision has at its core a ruling party that serves as the vanguard for everything from defending national security to providing moral guidance to ordinary Chinese. He has set the target date of 2049, the People’s Republic’s centenary, for the establishment of a prosperous, modern society. China has the world’s second-largest economy and legions of newly wealthy urban residents, but raising living standards for millions of people continues to be a challenge. Even so, it’s been pointed out that it’s not necessarily for Xi to achieve these goals – which are mostly lip service – as long as he holds onto power. Xi’s new status came at the close of the 89 million-member party’s national congress at Beijing’s huge Great Hall of the People, where nearly 2,300 delegates gathered to elect the party’s leading bodies and hear reports. All choices are carefully vetted and the outcomes decided by negotiations among the top leaders. The constitution was also amended to include references to the party’s “absolute” leadership over the armed forces, which have been modernizing rapidly under Xi, and a commitment to promote Xi’s signature foreign policy and infrastructure initiative known as “One Belt, One Road,” which seeks to link China to Southeast Asia, Central Asia, Africa, Europe and beyond with a network of roads, railways, ports and other economic projects.

Binary Options Industry Banned The Knesset on Monday unanimously passed a law to ban Israel’s binary options industry, a vast, multibillion dollar scam that has defrauded millions of victims worldwide for a decade. The law, which will go into effect three months from now, came about as a direct result of The Times of Israel’s investigative reporting on the fraud, which began with a March 2016 article entitled, “The wolves of Tel Aviv: Israel’s vast, amoral binary options scam exposed.” The law gives all binary options firms the intervening three months to cease operations. After that, anyone involved in binary options is punishable with up to two years in jail. Fifty-three Knesset members voted


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OCTOBER 26, 2017 | The Florida Jewish Home

for the law and none voted against it. The binary options industry, some of which has closed down in Israel in recent months as the legislation made its way through the Knesset, is an Israel-based enterprise which flourished with almost no intervention by law enforcement since 2007. Fewer than 20 Israelis have been arrested for binary options fraud, and none have been indicted. In September, the FBI arrested binary options CEO Lee Elbaz, when she disembarked from an airplane at JFK airport, underlining growing efforts by international law enforcement to tackle the crime. “We worry about the BDS movement,” said MK Rachel Azaria in her introduction to the law. “This industry has a huge impact on how Israel is viewed throughout the world. Our government officials go to international conferences and their colleagues abroad raise their eyebrows because of this industry.” The law to ban the industry took shape after Israel Securities Authority Chairman Shmuel Hauser promised in August 2016 that he would take the necessary steps to thwart the fraudsters. That same month, Jewish Agency chief Natan Sharansky urged the government to close down the “repugnant, immoral” industry. The Prime Minister’s Office called for it to be banned worldwide last fall. At its height, binary options was estimated to bring in $5 billion-$10 billion a year. Hundreds of firms have operated from Israel, employing thousands of Israelis, defrauding customers all over the world. Fraudulent Israeli binary options companies ostensibly offer customers worldwide a potentially profitable short-term investment. But in reality — through rigged trading platforms, refusal to pay out, and other ruses — these companies fleece the vast majority of customers of most or all of their money. The fraudulent salespeople routinely conceal where they are located, misrepresent what they are selling, and use false identities. The law that passed on Monday was a constrained version of the draft law that was introduced earlier this year. The original bill would not only have banned the entire binary options industry, but also forex and CFD companies that operate from Israel without a license. It was subsequently watered down to apply narrow-

ly to binary options. Critics have charged that this creates a loophole and that, with the new law in place, fraudulent binary options companies can simply tweak the product they offer and continue to operate. Some former binary options operatives have started to focus on opportunities to profit in the fields of diamond sales, cryptocurrencies, Initial Coin Offerings and predatory business loans. Others have moved their activities overseas — including to Ukraine and Cyprus.

Huge Produce Heist Thwarted

The largest produce heist in Israeli history was thwarted this week. Sixty-seven Palestinians were caught trying to steal tens of tons of agricultural produce from the Moshav Shekef in the Lachish region, near the West Bank Barrier. The heist was being carried out by 27 adults and 40 children and teenagers. The adults were arrested, while the children were released. According to Border Police investigators, the suspects picked an estimated 20 to 24 tons of grapes and another 5 to 7 tons of tomatoes. The group intended on selling the produce on the local market at Beit Awwa. They also damaged agricultural property and greenhouses. The Border Police are investigating how the thieves made it across the security barrier. Four vehicles were confiscated at the scene. Apparently this is not the first time produce has been stolen from the Moshav. One of the residents explained that intruders and thieves “took advantage of the fact that there are no workers here on Saturday.” The police are being praised for their quick response time and being able to catch the thieves in the act.

“striking event” of the year that allowed Russia to begin “uranium mining in the United States.” The head of the company boasted that the deal was part of Putin’s larger strategy to boost “Russia’s prestige as a leader of the world nuclear industry.”

Clinton at the Heart of Russian Uranium Traveling? You May Controversy Need a Passport Former President Bill Clinton sought to meet with a key board director of Rosatom, a Russian nuclear energy firm, while he was in Russia to collect $500,000 for a speaking deal. The company was in need of the Obama administration’s approval for a uranium deal that was considered very controversial at the time. The timing of his request – which took place in 2010 – has been noted by many to be very suspect.

Clinton Foundation foreign policy adviser Amitabh Desai wrote an email to the State Department before Clinton’s trip to seek permission for the meeting to take place. “In the context of a possible trip to Russia at the end of June, WJC is being asked to see the business/government folks below. Would State have concerns about WJC seeing any of these folks,” he wrote to former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton’s senior advisors Jake Sullivan and Cheryl Mills. It is not known what the State Department decided about the meetings, but in the end they did not occur. The former president met with Vladimir Putin at the Russian leader’s private home instead. The content of their meeting is also unknown. A spokesman for Secretary Clinton has complained that the continued focus on the Uranium One deal smacks of partisan politics aimed at benefiting Donald Trump. The uranium deal required the approval of the Committee on Foreign Investment in the United States (CFIUS), an intergovernmental panel represented by 14 departments and offices that approve transactions and investments by foreign companies for national security purposes. Approval of the deal would mean that the production of 20 percent of the United States uranium would be delegated to the Russian company. The FBI has uncovered evidence that Russian nuclear officials were engaged in a huge bribery scandal before CFIUS gave the deal a green light. The controversy drew attention from President Trump who said that uranium “is the real Russia story.” CFIUS’s approval was underlined in Rosatom’s annual 2010 report as the

Generally, when traveling domestically, a traveler simply needs a driver’s license, a birth certificate for children, or another form of picture ID to get through security. A passport is only required for international flights – for now. In 2005, Congress passed the REAL ID Act that will require travelers in some states to show another form of ID at the airport starting on January 22, 2018. The act established minimum security standards for state-issued driver’s licenses (and ID cards) and prohibits the Transportation Security Administration (TSA) from accepting cards that don’t meet the standards. In short, the act requires more sophisticated guidelines for authorizing driver’s licenses to enhance security, partly to combat terrorism. States that haven’t changed the way they issue licenses and still use the “less-secure” version will present an issue for some travelers at airport security after the law comes into place. Many states at the time requested extensions before complying with the new laws, and many of those extensions expired October 10. New extensions were granted but only until January 22. There are 26 states that are fully compliant with new license laws, so residents of those areas can continue to use their state-issued driver’s licenses when passing through airport security. However, the states that haven’t yet become compliant with the REAL ID Act, including New York, California, Illinois and Louisiana, are currently under review. This could result in a new extension to become compliant, but if they aren’t granted an extension then residents of these states will need to use an alternative form of ID when flying. Most people will use a passport as an alternative form of identification when traveling. But make sure to get yours renewed today. Shockingly, only 36% of Americans have valid passports, according to the U.S. Department of State. Passports cost $135 per person, which can get expensive for a family, especially if they do not plan on travel internationally in the near future.


The Florida Jewish Home | OCTOBER 26, 2017

An alternative is a passport card. Passport cards are significantly cheaper: first-time applicants are charged $55 per adult and $40 per child. The card is valid for 10 years, 5 years if you’re 16 or younger, after which a renewal will cost $30. A passport card is acceptable for some international travel. It can be used to cross borders from Canada, Mexico, the Caribbean and Bermuda.

NJ Sues Mahwah for Discrimination

New Jersey’s Attorney General’s Office filed a nine-count lawsuit against the town of Mahwah and its Township Council for discrimination. The suit contends that two ordinances adopted last summer discriminate against Orthodox Jews and recall the postwar era of white flight to the suburbs. One ordinance banned non-New Jersey residents from using Mahwah’s public parks and the other banned the posting of “lechis,” or little plastic strips, denoting the boundary of an eruv. The adoption of the ordinances has fractured the town, many pointing out that they smack of anti-Semitism. Some have protested against the expansion of Orthodox Jewish neighborhoods into Mahwah and other counties nearby from Rockland County, NY. On Tuesday,  Mayor Bill Laforet laid much of the blame for the inflamed rhetoric at public meetings on council President Robert Hermansen, whom he accused of stoking passions and fear-mongering. “His disgraceful behavior is now worsened by the severe potential financial penalties facing the township’s taxpayer,” Laforet said.  Mahwah and two other towns, Montvale and Upper Saddle River, have also been sued by the Bergen Rockland Eruv Association, which sought the eruv expansion. The state’s complaint, filed Tuesday in state Superior Court in Bergen County, asks the court to grant injunctions against the ordinances. Supporters of the ordinances in Mahwah view them as vital steps to ward off population explosions that would lead to affordability, housing and overcrowding issues. But the state views the approval of the ordinances as violating both legal and moral codes. “In addition to being on the wrong side of history, the conduct of Mahwah’s Township Council is legally wrong, and we intend to hold them accountable for it,” Attorney General Christopher Porrino said in

a statement. “To think that there are local governments here in New Jersey, in 2017, making laws on the basis of some archaic, fear-driven and discriminatory mindset is deeply disappointing and shocking to many, but it is exactly what we are alleging in this case. Of course, in this case we allege the target of the small-minded bias is not African-Americans, but Orthodox Jews. Nonetheless, the hateful message is the same.” In addition to the discrimination charges, the state is seeking to reclaim $3.4 million in Green Acres funds awarded to the township by the Department of Environmental Protection. The state contends that Mahwah violated the Green Acres Act by banning out-of-state residents from its parks because the law says the land acquired under the program cannot be restricted on the basis of religion or residency. “The Green Acres Program was created in 1961 and envisioned as a way to meet the recreation and conservation needs of our growing state. It was intended to ensure that in the future, there would always be plenty of open spaces across New Jersey for people — all people — to enjoy,” Bob Martin, commissioner of the Department of Environmental Protection, said in a statement. “What’s been happening in Mahwah with respect to the township’s parks ordinance is not in accordance with the original intent of the Green Acres Program. As such, it is unacceptable, and it cannot be allowed to stand.” Agudath Israel of America’s New Jersey director, Rabbi Avi Schnall, called the lawsuit “a landmark development.” “Newspaper accounts of the Attorney General’s action described it as ‘stunning,’” Rabbi Schnall noted. “But what is truly stunning is that the haters who sought to employ every means possible to prevent Orthodox Jews from moving into Mahwah or even visiting its public parks were quite open in expressing their hatred. Attorney General Porrino deserves all the credit in the world for challenging this blatant discrimination in a court of law.” The controversy in Mahwah is not new but certain actions brought the issue to the fore recently. Earlier this year the township amended its sign ordinance to effectively ban lechis on utility poles. The council also voted to authorize Mahwah’s zoning officer to issue summonses against the Bergen Rockland Eruv Association for violating the existing ordinance. The state alleges that the eruv ban is unconstitutional and tantamount to housing discrimination because it interferes with the ability of observant Orthodox Jews to live in town. The park ban was approved by the seven-member council unanimously when it was introduced in June. Later that month, council members heard comments from the public at a meeting as well as through social media and email, many of which were “overtly anti-Semitic” in nature, the Attorney General’s Office said.

World’s Smallest Hotel

Looking to vacation in Jordan on midwinter break? If you’re flying solo, you may want to check out the world’s smallest hotel – at least according to owner Mohammed Al Malaheem. The 64-year-old has turned his old battered VW Beetle into a “five star experience” for travelers. “This village is my homeland, I was born here, I grew up here, I lived here,” says Al Malaheem – who goes by the name Abu Ali. “I wanted to start a project that improves its situation and places it on the tourism map, because it truly overlooks some of the most beautiful scenery in the region.” Abu Ali lives in the desert village of Al Jaya. Most residents have left the village in search of a more modern lifestyle. It’s located near Al Shoubak, home to an imposing 12th century castle called Montreal. After retiring in 2011, Abu Ali opened his VW’s doors for guests. Furnished by

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his daughter, the repurposed car is adorned with handmade embroidered sheets and pillows decorated with traditional patterns and embellished with colorful beads. A hand-painted sign near the VW declares that it’s the world’s smallest hotel. Guinness World Records, though, does not agree. According to them, that title is bestowed upon the 2.5 meter wide Eh’häusl Hotelin Amberg, Germany. Abu Ali’s passion for the project is such that he took on a bank loan to set up a hotel “lobby” inside a nearby cave, naming it “Baldwin’s Grotto,” after Baldwin I of Jerusalem, who built Montreal castle in 1115. He uses it to serve visitors coffee, tea and traditional Jordanian snacks. There’s also a tiny kiosk-style shop selling souvenirs such as antiques, jewelry, gemstones, copper miniatures and historical artifacts, which hotel guests can purchase at the end of their visit. Although it accommodates no more than two people at a time, Abu Ali says he has welcomed visitors from all over the world – amongst them VIPs. Those who don’t find a space to sleep can enjoy a Jordanian breakfast or lunch, prepared and served the traditional Bedouin way by his wife, Um Ali, and daughters. A night in the VW with full board costs 40 Jordanian Dinars (around $56). At that price you’ll be graced by Abu Ali’s charm – and not much else.

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OCTOBER 26, 2017 | The Florida Jewish Home

Going the extra mile!

York hotel in Times Square recently announced that their $1,000 bagel – which had a limited run in 2007 – will be making a return to the hotel after multiple requests. Why the jaw-dropping price? The bagel’s toppings include goji berry infused Riesling jelly, gold leaves and Alba white truffle cream cheese. “Pound for pound, the white truffle is the second most expensive food in the world, next to caviar,” the hotel explains – or attempts to explain – the exorbitant fee. Officially, proceeds from the over-thetop breakfast food will be donated to a soup kitchen. The bagels will be available from November 1 to December 15, and guests need to order their steep sandwich 24 hours in advance. This is certainly something I can wryly say is found only in New York.

writings,” said Grosz. “This is a stone in the mosaic.” The two notes went on sale on Tuesday at the Winner’s auction house in Jerusalem. An anonymous buyer purchased the words of wisdom for $1.8 million.

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Years ago, Albert Einstein, in Tokyo at the time, received a message via Japanese courier. It was 1922, and Einstein had recently been informed that he was to receive the Nobel Prize for physics. He was on a lecture tour in Japan. After receiving the message from the courier, Einstein in return gave the courier two notes in lieu of a tip. The notes were written in German and are up for auction this week. “Maybe if you’re lucky those notes will become much more valuable than just a regular tip,” Einstein told the messenger, according to the seller, a resident of the German city of Hamburg and a relative of the courier, who wished to remain anonymous. One note, on the stationary of the Imperial Hotel Tokyo, says: “A quiet and modest life brings more joy than a pursuit of success bound with constant unrest.” The other, on a blank piece of paper, simply reads: “Where there’s a will, there’s a way.” It is impossible to determine if the notes were a reflection of Einstein’s own musings on his growing fame, said Roni Grosz, the archivist in charge of the world’s largest Einstein collection, at Jerusalem’s Hebrew University. The notes, obviously, don’t hold any scientific value, but many wonder if they open a door into the brilliant mind of the physicist. “What we’re doing here is painting the portrait of Einstein — the man, the scientist, his effect on the world — through his

Looking for a place to move to but don’t have the funds to get there? Have no fear. Candela, a town in Italy, will be the perfect place for you. Candela is located some two hours from Naples. Its mayor, Nicola Gatta, is offering up to $2,350 to anyone willing to relocate to the town. The municipality once boasted more than 8,000 residents. Now, that number has shrunk to 2,700 people who call Candela their home. Located in the agrarian “breadbasket of Italy,” Candela was once known as “Little Naples” for its bustling city center. “I work each day with passion and commitment to bring Candela back to its ancient splendor,” says Gatta. “Up until the 1960s, travelers called it ‘Nap’licchie’ (Little Naples), for its streets full of wayfarers, tourists, merchants and screaming vendors.” A shrinking population is not unknown in small towns in Italy. In the seaside village of Ostano, there are fewer than 90 people who live there. There were no births in the town between 1987 and 2016. Gatta says that a single person moving to town will receive around $950 from the village; a couple will get around $1,400. Have children? That’s great! Families of three can get up to $2,100, and families of four or more receive more than $2,350 for moving to Candela. You will have to work for your money. Residents have to rent a house in town for at least a year, and they have to work, earning a minimum annual salary of $8,800. Six families from northern Italy have already settled in and another five have applied to move. Better hurry and renew your passport before all the money runs out.


The Florida Jewish Home | OCTOBER 26, 2017

Save the Date YESHIVA TORAS CHAIM TORAS EMES OPEN HOUSE SCHEDULE

Early Childhood Open House November 5, 7:15 pm High School Open House November 12, 10:30 am Middle School Open House December 10, 10:00 am

For More Information or to RSVP

Miriam Chait 305.947.9477 / mchait@ytcteam.org

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Community Enrollment Soars as Hebrew Academy Enters 70th Year Back in 1947, Hebrew Academy (RASG) made history by creating the first Dati Tzioni (Modern Orthodox) Jewish Day School south of Baltimore. And 70 years later, the school continues to flourish and expand. “We have a lot to celebrate as we enter our 70th Anniversary year achieving increased enrollment. With a 10 percent boost in first day enrollment this year compared to last year, and a 6% decrease in student attrition, the numbers speak for themselves,” said Dr. Ami Eskanos, Dean of Admission. “Our students are happy and successful and the resultant satisfaction of our families can be felt in the atmosphere of our school and the community at large.” Rabbi Alexander Sender Gross z”l was Hebrew Academy’s first Head of School and later became the namesake. He and other founding families combined efforts and dedication enabling Hebrew Academy to grow from a few tiny classrooms into the pillar of the community the school has now become. “Our school was the first of its kind and was a pioneer and model for the Modern Orthodox Jewish Day Schools we see today around the nation,” said Rabbi Zvi Kahn, Head of School. “Seventy years later we try to maintain those early ideals while being at the forefront of innovation

for our students.” Passion and vision for a Jewish educational experience were the seeds of the school’s humble beginnings in the Methodist Church building at 918 Sixth Street in 1947. The first classes in two rooms appeared modest, but the vision was grand: to create a school that would combine Hebrew, Judaic and college preparatory programs in equal measure, and prepare students for success in both worlds. A move to the current Pine Tree Drive campus in 1961 provided the luxury of space and the ability to expand. With recent renovations of the auditorium, media, art studio, many classrooms, and the opening of a new gymnasium, Hebrew Academy continues to grow. A Capital Campaign and architectural plans to build a new Middle/High School building are underway fostering Rabbi Gross’s dream of providing a Jewish education for every Jewish child. “This new building is more than just a fresh facility. This is really about ensuring our students have access to new and exciting opportunities that expand their education,” said Rabbi Zvi Kahn, Head of School.

If you would like to learn more about Hebrew Academy (RASG), please join us at one of our Open House events: Middle School Open House Thursday, November 2 8:00 am Burstein Cafeteria High School Open House Sunday, November 5 10:00 am High School Cafeteria Elementary Open House Tuesday, November 28 8:30 am Burstein Cafeteria Early Childhood Tuesday, December 5

8:30 am Burstein Cafeteria Where are we located? 2400 Pine Tree Drive Miami Beach, Florida 33140 Can’t attend Open House? Every day is Open House at Hebrew Academy. To schedule an appointment, please contact us at 305.532.6421 ext. 113 or admission@rasg.org. ABOUT THE HEBREW ACADEMY Through the light of Torah and academic excellence, Hebrew Academy inspires each and every student to improve the world. Hebrew Academy is a Modern Orthodox Jewish college and yeshiva preparatory school serving students from birth through grade 12. For more information, please visit www.hebrewacademymiami.org.

Sha’arei Bina Torah Academy for Girls: Believe, Inspire, Nuture, Achieve Sha’arei Bina is an Orthodox Jewish Girls School whose goal is to integrate an extensive Judaic Studies program with a challenging college preparatory curriculum. Sha’arei Bina provides a dynamic, Jewish education that fosters rigorous intellectual discipline, spiritual connection, an abiding love for Torah and unwavering commitment to its mitzvot and values. Sha’arei Bina provides a challenging curriculum in general studies according to the highest educational standards as a

complement to and enhancement of Torah study. By creating a climate of active intellectual inquiry in both disciplines, Sha’arei Bina encourages exploration and appreciation of the world and its offerings. Sha’arei Bina ultimately will conduct Judaic Studies in the Hebrew language; thus, our students will gain proficiency and deep feelings for the language of our ancestors, the language in which the Torah was transmitted, and the language spoken in Israel in our present day.

Sha’arei Bina is committed to the growth of the total Torah personality. This is accomplished by emphasizing the responsibility of each Jew toward Hashem and to all humanity. Sha’arei Bina infuses in its students a love of Eretz Yisrael, Am Yisrael, and Torat Yisrael. Sha’arei Bina believes that the creation of the State of Israel is one of the seminal events in Jewish history. Recognizing the significance of the State and its national institutions, we seek to instill in our students an attachment to the State

of Israel and its people as well as a sense of responsibility for their welfare. To this end, our Ivrit classes emphasize modern Hebrew and Yediat Ha’aretz. Sha’arei Bina prepares its students to pursue their Judaic and general studies at challenging institutions of higher learning and be lifelong learners. Sha’arei Bina provides the foundation for its students to mature as committed Jews and to become role models who will ultimately fill leadership roles within the Jewish and global communities.


The Florida Jewish Home | OCTOBER 26, 2017

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With Rakes, Saws, Heart and More, Teens from Rosenblatt HS at Donna Klein Jewish Academy and Katz Yeshiva High School Go Hands-On to Help in Key West

Among the South Palm Beach County Jewish community’s extensive Hurricane Relief efforts was an eye-opening, heartwarming, hands-on experience in Key West for twenty-two high school students from Rosenblatt High School at Donna Klein Jewish Academy (DKJA), and Katz Yeshiva High School (KYHS). They took off at 6:00 am on Tuesday, September 26, ready for a long day of clearing debris and cleaning, in a charter bus loaded with supplies and equipment. But they encountered and accomplished more than they’d imagined before arriving home after 10:30 pm that night. “Although power had just been restored to the neighborhood where we were headed, our drive south through areas severely affected by Hurricane Irma had some delays, including when a powerline fell onto the road ahead of us,” said Rabbi Josh Broide, who organized the trip and accompanied the students as Director of the Deborah and Larry D. Silver Center for Jewish Engagement at the Jewish Federation of South Palm Beach County, which sponsored the bus. Both high schools are located on the Federation’s 100-acre campus west of Boca Raton.

Also accompanying the students were Shira Englander, Director of Student Activities at Katz Yeshiva High School, and Rabbi Boruch Shmuel Liberow, Director of the Chabad Student Center at Florida Atlantic University. Their time in Key West started at the Chabad Center with Rabbi Yaakov Zucker at the Chabad Jewish Center in Key West. After unloading and putting to use their donated 40 pairs of gardening gloves, shovels, rakes, heavy duty brooms, trash bags, power drills, hand saws, chainsaws, garden rakes and more, they set to work removing fallen trees and other debris, as well as cleaning up. “Throughout the day, we had to consider how to clean up areas without causing any further damage,” said Rabbi Broide. “Our greatest challenge was removing a tree over the mikvah. It required the students to work together to plan the best approach.” From the Chabad synagogue, they headed to three Jewish family homes that were covered with trees and all sizes of parts from other buildings. Broide described a house where the front was completely blocked by a huge piece of the

hotel roof that had blown off two blocks away. In a video from Key West, students Justin Goodis of DKJA and Sivan Mussaffi from KYHS described how grateful they were to the Federation for the opportunity to accomplish so much to help a community devastated by Hurricane Irma, and how amazing it was to work together throughout the day. “The trip was incredibly inspiring and changed my perspective,” said Rabbi Liberow, who has also traveled with FAU students to provide hands-on hurricane relief. “We are all one and we have to be there for each other. But it is one thing to talk about helping and quite another to actually do the work in person. As I told the students, real life is when you leave your comfort zone on behalf of another who needs your help.” “Our time in Key West was a once in a

Scheck Hillel Community School's Parshat Noach Activities

lifetime experience for our students,” said Shira Englander. “After seeing the devastation on the way there, they were eager to jump right in and provide some relief to the Chabad and their neighbors. The students experienced what it means to give back through sweat, hard work and physical labor, and working alongside students from another school was an added bonus. We are so grateful to Rabbi Josh Broide and the Federation for affording us this opportunity. It was a day none of us will ever forget.” “This was one of the myriad of activities generating from our community in response to so much destruction in so many areas from the recent storms,” said Rabbi Broide. “Our work will continue as long as we are needed.”


The Florida Jewish Home | OCTOBER 26, 2017

Donna Klein Jewish Academy is one of the premier Jewish day schools in the country for children in grades K-12. Step onto our campus and you’ll feel the energy of a diverse, inclusive community joined in a love of knowledge and the joy of learning. Listen to our teachers as they inspire and instruct each student. Look closely at the dynamic, enriched curriculum that prepares our students for the best colleges and universities. Visit DKJA — you’ll discover an education of extraordinary power and purpose.

INSPIRING THE MINDS THAT WILL

CHANGE THE WORLD

KINDERGARTEN OPEN HOUSE SAVE THE DATE! NOV. 7th | 9:30 a.m. TUITION ASSISTANCE | TRANSPORTATION AVAILABLE RSVP to admissions@dkja.net or call 561.852.3310 K-12 | DKJA.net 9701 Donna Klein Blvd. | Boca Raton, FL 33428

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OCTOBER 26, 2017 | The Florida Jewish Home

YESHIVA TIFERES TORAH OF BOCA RATON

OPEN HOUSE

INTENSIVE JUDAIC STUDIES

COMPETITIVE SPORTS LEAGUES

CHALLENGING COLLEGE PREPARATORY GENERAL STUDIES POST HIGH SCHOOL BAIS MEDRASH PROGRAM

FOR PROSPECTIVE PARENTS SUNDAY, DEC. 3 / 7:30PM

FOR PROSPECTIVE STUDENTS WEDNESDAY, DEC. 6 / 5:00-9:30PM

AT OUR CAMPUS 7200 PALMETTO CIRCLE N. WARM NURTURING ENVIRONMENT

To request further information please contact us at 561-750-7151 or info@ttboca.org


The Florida Jewish Home | OCTOBER 26, 2017

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Around the Community

About Katz Hillel Day School of Boca Raton… Katz Hillel Day School (KHDS) of Boca Raton is located on the beautiful 15-acre Milton B. Katz Campus, adjacent to the Jewish Federation of South Palm Beach County. KHDS currently serves over 500 students from age 2 through 8th grades from Miami-Dade, Broward and Palm Beach Counties with a dual curriculum (50% general studies/50% Torah & Judaic studies). Curriculum and notable programs include: Judaic Studies: Chumash, Talmud, Jewish Law & Philosophy, Hebrew Language Class Trips: 8th grade Israel; 7th grade Washington, D.C.; 6th grade Pigeon Key Math & Science Enrichment Program Character Development Programs Middle School Electives Handwriting without Tears Aftershool Kids Time Program (KTP) Award-winning Talmud Program on iPads Sherut Leumi program to promote Zionism

Camp Ruach – summer camp (ages 2 through 6th grade) School divisions include: Rosalind Henwood Early Childhood Learning Center (EC2 through Kindergarten) Teddy & Linda Struhl Elementary School (1st through 5th grade) Middle School (6th through 8th grade) ETGAR (Special Education Program) Where do our families live?? 80% live in Boca Raton, 20% live in Hollywood, Boynton Beach, and other surrounding areas. KHDS has graduated over 600

students and alumni have been accepted to Princeton, Harvard, Yale University, University of Pennsylvania, Columbia, Cornell, Brandeis, Carnegie Mellon, University of Maryland, Yeshiva University, Bar-Ilan University and many more

as well as many prominent yeshivot and seminaries in Israel. KHDS awards over $1.5 million in scholarship aid annually. Call us to schedule a tour at 561-470-5000 or come to our Open House and Chanukah Fair on December 17!

The TTB Experience: Yeshiva Tiferes Torah of Boca Raton Yeshiva Tiferes Torah of Boca Raton or “TTB” was founded in 2014 to fill the need for an all-boys Yeshiva High School in the burgeoning Orthodox community of Boca Raton, Florida. With TTB’s mission of uncompromising standards for Torah education and college-preparatory academics, it is no wonder they have filled all four grades plus the post-High School Bais Medrash Program, with an enrollment of 80 students. The atmosphere at TTB is one of warmth and camaraderie. The teachers and Rabbeim support each student in their ascent to excellence while striving to build meaningful and nurturing relationships that will last well beyond their years at TTB. The High School emphasizes the significance of Torah learning as the focus of Jewish life, and understands the importance of providing its young men with a rigorous college preparatory education for today’s world. Its graduates will be prepared to accept and conquer the challenges of life, with a strong commitment to their Torah, and a heartfelt love of every Jew. Educational Philosophy We are proud to have a student philosophy that focuses on a deep understanding of each student, respecting and assisting with his inner growth and challenges, and recognizing his innate abilities and capabilities. A High School where a student can thrive and reach his utmost in Judaic and General education, where our students will be capable of excelling on the highest levels. We endeavor to make each interaction

with a student carry with it an innate respect for him as a growing young adult, who is the ultimate driver of his life and choices. Our goal is to empower and assist these young adults to develop their judgement, to make sound decisions, and to develop into wise, accomplished adults. This philosophy is brought to life under the careful guidance of TTB’s Rosh Yeshiva and Head of School, Rabbi Yehoshua Schloss, who is a renowned educator with over a decade of educational experience. An Uncompromising Torah Education The major focus of our Limudei Kodesh (Judaic) program is in Iyun, the intensive study of Gemara and classical Meforshim. The primary objective of Iyun is to develop the language, critical thinking, and reasoning skills necessary for sophisticated learning. To meet the individual needs of all our students, Iyun is divided into honors and regular level classes. Our Rebbeim also place a strong emphasis on the student’s character development, focusing on fundamental Mussar concepts such as Derech Eretz, honesty, human dignity, self-esteem, humility, and responsibility to the Jewish Nation. Additionally, all students attend a weekly Torah lecture focusing on human nature, character development, relationships and psychology, all based on Torah sources and texts, with practical applications for daily life. All the Limudei Kodesh courses at TTB are designed to give our students a full breadth of knowledge, skills and a deep love and appreciation of Torah. The curriculum is taught at various levels to accommodate

the varied needs and capabilities of the students. College Preparatory General Studies Program In three short years, the General Studies curriculum at TTB has developed a reputation as an outstanding and very well-respected program by both parents and educators alike. As TTB continues a trajectory of growth and expansion, raising the academic bar is a constant goal. Our academic advisor, Mr. Harvey Feldman, general studies principal of DRS for many years, and the current founding principal of YDE (Yeshiva Derech Eretz), brings over 35 years of educational experience to the table. Working closely with the administration to add higher level courses, raise the level of the curriculum and develop curricular goals for each class, Mr. Feldman ensures that appropriate standards are being met schoolwide. The TTB administration has assembled an exemplary staff of caring, experienced and motivated teachers who are dedicated to helping our young men achieve their academic goals. The comprehensive curriculum covers all required High School subjects with many opportunities for higher level learning. Currently TTB offers three different AP courses in an expanding advanced placement program which is based on student interest. The AP college program is in addition to a highly successful Honors Math program, with special attention given to preparation for PSAT and SAT exams in both English and Math. For TTB seniors, Mrs. Noa Bejar, a highly experienced and well-respect-

ed college adviser, is available to guide students and parents in all college related matters. Student Life The TTB High School experience is greatly enhanced by extracurricular activities and programming. Basketball leagues, Football leagues, field trips, Shabbatonim, Oneg’s, Rosh Chodesh Mesiba’s and guest lectures are some examples of student life at TTB. Our athletic program plays a particularly crucial role in the boys’ development from both a physical and emotional standpoint. These events are designed to create Achdus, friendship, and camaraderie amongst the students, Bais Medrash Bochurim and Rabbeim, and have proven to be a major highlight of the TTB experience. The Bais Medrash program at TTB offers post High School students the opportunity to continue their Torah study full time, strengthening their skills and learning at a more advanced level. Under the exceptional guidance of Rabbi Shaul Opoczynski and Rabbi Yigal Abramchik, Roshei Yeshiva, these young men add a unique dimension to the High School experience, serving as “Big Brothers” and role models to whom the boys look up to and emulate. For more information please contact TTB at 561-750-7151 or at info@ttboca. org. Open House for prospective parents will be held Sunday Dec. 3rd. Open House for prospective students will be held Wednesday Dec. 6th.


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OCTOBER 26, 2017 | The Florida Jewish Home

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Scheck Hillel Students Advance in 2018 National Merit Scholarship Program Senior Nathalie Fuhrman Named National Merit Semifinalist

Congratulations to our 2017 National Honor Society Inductees

National Merit Scholars Hillrl

The prestigious 2018 National Merit Scholarship Program has recognized four Scheck Hillel Community School seniors. Nathalie Fuhrman has been named a National Merit Semifinalist, part of a nationwide pool that represents less than 1% of U.S. high school seniors. Keith Bonwitt, Roy Glazer and Max Peicher have been named National Merit Commended Students, placing among the top scorers of more than 1.6 million students who entered the competition by taking the 2016 Preliminary SAT/National Merit  Scholarship Qualifying Test (PSAT/ NMSQT®).   “Congratulations to Nathalie, Keith, Roy, Max and their families,” said Dr. Ezra Levy, Scheck Hillel’s Head of School. “Recognition from the National Merit Scholarship Program is a tremendous honor, and we are very proud of them. These students reinforce that the

Jewish future we are building is bright, guided by young people who shine in and beyond the classroom.” All four seniors were recently recognized by the College Board as 2017 AP Scholars with Distinction. Nathalie is a Jaime and Raquel Gilinski Hillel Ambassador, a member of National Honor Society and Co-President of the Books Across Borders Club; she plays the alto saxophone in Scheck Hillel’s band. She is a lifeguard and water safety instructor and involved in the MAR-JCC Bamachol Dance Program, as both a dancer and a teacher. Nathalie’s community service with Chai Lifeline rounds out her impressive work. Keith is a Jaime and Raquel Gilinski Hillel Ambassador, a member of National Honor Society, President of the school’s Technology Club and Captain of the cross-country team. Roy was the

Class of 2018’s Grade 10 President; he is a Vice-President of the school’s Technology Club and a madrich of school Shabbatonim. Max is the Senior Class President and a Technology Club Vice-President; he plays on the school’s varsity soccer team. From school programs to involvement with J-Serve and Maccabi Tzair, these students also make a difference through community service. Scheck Hillel is honored to have graduated a significant roster of National Merit Scholars, Finalists, Semifinalists and Commended Students, and to carry the tradition into 2018. Most recently, Jordana Zackon, Class of 2017 valedictorian, was named a 2017 National Merit Commended Student; she is now a freshman at Washington University in St. Louis. Scheck Hillel’s 2016 salutatorian, Ariel Gelrud, was a 2016 National Merit Scholar and attends the Universi-

Sukkot Celebrations at Scheck Hillel Community School

ty of Pennsylvania.  About Scheck Hillel Community School  Scheck Hillel Community School educates and inspires students 18 monthsGrade 12 to become exemplary global citizens with enduring Jewish identity and values through an individualized college preparatory curriculum highlighted by STEM and design, Capstone, college dual enrollment, arts, athletics and community service. Its 14-acres include a 115,000-sq.-ft athletic complex with additional expansion plans. Set within a nurturing, diverse community, Scheck Hillel is one of the world’s largest Jewish community day schools and a National Blue Ribbon School of Excellence. For information, please visit eHillel.org.


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OCTOBER 26, 2017 | The Florida Jewish Home

Around the Community

IsraAID Sends Response Teams for Emergency Relief in Florida, Houston, Mexico & Puerto Rico The last two weeks, IsraAID sent Emergency Response teams to Florida, Mexico, Puerto Rico and Dominica after Hurricanes Irma and Maria wreaked havoc on the Caribbean islands and Southern Florida, and Mexico was hit by the strongest earthquake measured since 1985.    Meanwhile, IsraAID’s third relief team deployed to Houston to join the massive clear-up efforts following Hurricane Harvey, and specialists continued their ongoing relief work in Nepal and Sierra Leone after August’s extreme floods and mud/landslides ravaged communities.    This summer, an incessant number of weather-related natural disasters, including floods, storms and mud/landslides, have caused overwhelming loss of life, mass destruction, displacement and permanent damage to building and water infrastructures worldwide. Drawing on close to two decades of humanitarian responses in 41 countries, including in 11 US States dating back to Hurricane Katrina in 2005, IsraAID’s teams across the globe continue to provide rapid and critical support to communities affected by these natural disasters. Over the past six weeks IsraAID deployed over 100 volunteers and professionals to 7 Emergencies around the world: Texas and Florida, USA: In Houston, IsraAID’s relief teams have been heavily involved in debris removal work since Hurricane Harvey struck. This week, a third team arrived to join the efforts, and a seven-person professional recovery team arrived in the worst-affected parts of Florida, following Hurricane Irma.  Both the Houston and Florida teams are working closely with local communities and our US-based partner Team Rubicon to remove debris, clean out destroyed houses one-by-one, and help distressed

residents sift through the wreckages of their former homes, salvaging anything recoverable. They are focusing on helping the elderly, disabled and uninsured or those without the means to start the recovery efforts; all enormously affected by the extreme flooding. Quotes from Florida: “I love working with IsraAID, as an Enlisted Marine scheduling US Marine Pilots flying Israeli F-21 Kafir Fighter jets in training missions in Arizona. The Israelis have great teamwork, and work ethics. Its amazing the bridges that have been built over the past few weeks while drinking Israeli Coffee” - Sheri Sperin US Marine Corps 29 Years Retiree, Team Rubicon “Its been amazing being part of IsraAID’s global emergency response, in a time where we have seen vast destruction by natural disasters around the world. Our team has enjoyed working closely with our American Counterparts sharing stories, experiences and shared values while working to restore the lives of individuals affected by Hurricane Irma. “ - Elin Giertz Anderson, Head of Florida Mission, IsraAID “It is amazing to witness the true meaning of friendship between our great nations. It has been great working with the multiple diverse organizations to work towards a common goal.” - Yonatan Rubin, World Zionist Organizations  Mexico: Following last week’s 7.1 magnitude earthquake near Puebla, IsraAID’s team, which includes several psychosocial professionals, deployed within days. Its relief efforts are focused in Mexico’s more remote, earthquake-affected areas, providing medical support, relief supplies and child-friendly spaces for children.  The team, working closely with Cadena AC, is providing mental

health support to the most affected and vulnerable, particularly those evacuated to shelters for an indeterminate time. The Mexican people are still reeling from the impact of the last earthquake, just weeks ago, and this newest disaster further compounds the crisis. A resident from the community of Hueyapan in the heavily affected state of Morelos, Mexico noted: “IsraAID is the first help that has arrived in our village. We are very grateful for your visit- because we have not received any help yet, and we feel very forgotten.” Puerto Rico: On 19th September, Hurricane Maria, the most powerful storm to hit the US territory in nearly a century, devastated the island of Puerto Rico, an already impoverished place. It caused loss of life and extreme damage to the island’s infrastructure and buildings. Based on initial assessments and discussions with the county and state authorities, IsraAID’s team has planned a multi-focused, two-stage response, starting with (1) emergency relief, post-trauma mental health support, and Water Sanitation and Hygiene solutions, followed by (2) large-scale debris removal. The team includes experienced professionals from both Israel, and IsraAID’s regional, established base in Haiti.  IsraAID’s co-CEOS, Voni Glick and Yotam Polizer noted: “Responding to six disasters, while continuing to operate longer-term programs in 16 other countries around the world, during the Jewish high holidays is extremely challenging. However, we are committed to responding to humanitarian crises wherever and whenever they occur, using some of Israel’s most experienced, Emergency Relief professionals. We are deeply inspired by the resiliency of local communities across the affected areas, and by the courage and

endless energies of IsraAID’s staff and volunteers, who are prepared to drop everything to help those most in need.” Meanwhile, in August, our medical and health professionals in Nepal, treated over 1,200 patients severely affected by the flooding in Southern Nepal and distributed essential hygiene kits. While, in Sierra Leone, our team delivered emergency relief distributions and set up vital water, sanitation and hygiene measures to prevent the spread of dangerous, waterborne diseases. Our teams remain in both countries, and are now focusing on the longer-term needs of the affected communities. IsraAID remains committed to supporting individuals, families, and communities affected by these natural disasters. Our Emergency Management Team remains on full alert, and continues to closely monitor each crisis, assessing both short and mid-term needs.Please visit our parent website at www.wzo.org.il/ world-zionist-organization If interested in writing an article please contact IsraAIDs Communication Director, Mickey Noam Alon at for more information and shared coordination. mnoamalon@israaid.org - 0526733923

A White House Visit: Ivanka Trump & Jared Kushner Host Chai Lifeline Children at the White House Not too many kids get the opportunity to go bowling at the Harry S. Truman Bowling Alley in the White House. Even fewer people get to bowl with Ivanka Trump and Jared Kushner. A group of children from Chai Lifeline, an organization dedicated to bring happiness to children suffering from life-threatening illnesses such as cancer, partook in the event of a lifetime in the special invitation visit to the White House. The group of Chai Lifeline Mid-Atlantic children came to the White House during the eventful Sukkot Chol Hamoed trip last month. The children, accompanied by case manager Rivkah Flaum, enjoyed an exclu-

sive VIP tour of The White House. Their day began with a meeting with Secretary of Housing and Urban Development Dr. Ben Carson. The group was inspired by the words of Dr. Carson, who is also a renowned pediatric neurosurgeon. They then enjoyed a VIP tour of the East Wing and the Office of Vice President. After a delicious lunch break and an excursion to the National Museum of Natural History, the Chai Lifeline group headed back to the White House for bowling at the Harry S. Truman Bowling Alley in the White House. They were surprised by a visit from Ivanka Trump and Jared Kushner, who wished the families a Chag Sameach –

Happy Holidays before returning to their responsibilities. Chai Lifeline reports the kids – and their parents – were star-struck and blown away by their warmth and compassion. They thank Jared and Ivanka for giving the families an experience they will never forget.

Chai Lifeline restores the light of childhood when cancer, life-threatening, or lifelong illness is diagnosed. Located in numerous countries around the globe – US, Canada, UK, Belgium, & Israel. For more info visit: www.ChaiLifeline.org


The Florida Jewish Home | OCTOBER 26, 2017

POTENTIAL FAMILIES ARE INVITED TO LEARN MORE ABOUT HEBREW ACADEMY AT OUR OPEN HOUSE EVENTS MIDDLE SCHOOL OPEN HOUSE THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 2 8:00 AM BURSTEIN CAFETERIA

ELEMENTARY SCHOOL OPEN HOUSE TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 28 8:30 AM BURSTEIN CAFETERIA

HIGH SCHOOL OPEN HOUSE SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 5 10:00 AM HIGH SCHOOL CAFETERIA

EARLY CHILDHOOD OPEN HOUSE TUESDAY, DECEMBER 5 8:30 AM BURSTEIN CAFETERIA

INFANT–GRADE 12 College & Yeshiva Preparatory Full Athletics Zionistic Transportation Available

Extracurricular Activities Scholarships Available STEAM & Blended Learning

Can’t attend? Every day is Open House at Hebrew Academy. To schedule an appointment or to RSVP, contact us at 305-532-6421 ext. 113 or admission@rasg.org. 2400 PINE TREE DRIVE | MIAMI BEACH, FLORIDA, 33140 | hebrewacademymiami.org

Can’t attend Open House? Every day is Open House at

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OCTOBER 26, 2017 | The Florida Jewish Home

Around the Community

SBTAG to Produce Holocaust Memorial Documentary On Monday, October 23rd, Sha’arei Bina’s eighth grade students were introduced to what will certainly be an educational experience they will never forget. Rabbi Tzvi Berkson, our on-site project coordinator, explained to the students what awaits them as participants in the Names Not Numbers Project © The students will be gaining first hand knowledge and form intergenerational relationships with the Heroes and Survivors of World War II and the Shoah, as they create a lasting original documentary This project offers an integrated, multidisciplinary curriculum, combining research through a custom made website, interviewing techniques,

documentary film tools and editing techniques. Throughout the project, the students will work with professional adults, journalists, filmmaker and historians. Dr. Rochelle Brand, Head of School has been involved with this project for over twelve years and in conjunction with Mrs. Tova Fish-Rosenberg, well known international educator who originated and developed this project, has overseen the creation of multiple unique documentaries which are now archived at the Jewish National and University Library of Israel at the Hebrew University in Jerusalem. In addition, the documentaries are being archived at Yad Vashem and the Gottesman Library at

Yeshiva University. We anticipate a community wide showing of the SBTAG Names Not Numbers Holocaust Memorial Documentary in May, 2018. Sha’arei Bina Torah Academy for Girls is located at 2907 Taylor Street, Hollywood. Florida. You are invited to learn more about our school at our Open House, Sunday, November 12th. RSVP office@shaareibina. org

Orthodox Union: ‘Women Don’t Need to be Rabbis to be Leaders’ OU Announces Department of Women’s Initiative: Enhancing Orthodox Women’s Active Engagement in Synagogue and Community Life The Orthodox Union, the nation’s oldest and largest umbrella organization for the Orthodox Jewish community, announced the creation of the Department of Women’s Initiatives to coordinate all of the OU’s programming for women. Rebbetzin Dr. Adina Shmidman will lead the new department, which will be committed to advancing the spiritual, religious and communal involvement of women at all stages of life and within all segments of the Orthodox community. “We want to create programs that will inspire women of all ages and stages to find their personal leadership voice - to lead others and lead themselves toward greater religious growth,” said Dr. Shmidman, a dynamic community leader and teacher for more than two decades in New York, Alabama and Pennsylvania. Dr. Shmidman, whose doctorate is in Educational Psychology, currently serves as the rebbetzin of the Lower Merion Synagogue of Bala Cynwyd, PA. She is the founding chair of the Rebbetzin Elaine Wolf a”h Rebbetzin to Rebbetzin Mentoring Program at Yeshiva University’s Center for the Jewish Future. She will begin as Director of the Department of Women’s Initiatives on November 1, 2017. “By strengthening our commitment to women, we hope to advance spiritual, religious and communal engagement and infuse lives with renewed energy and meaning,” she added. “The OU is committed to putting its full array of resources into this bold new department,” said OU President Moishe Bane, “and dedicating all means necessary to ensure that every woman in our community is not only connected, but feels encouraged to grow and reach new spiritual

heights.” Allen Fagin, Executive Vice President of the OU, said, ‘’I’m excited that after an extensive, nationwide search, Dr. Shmidman has agreed to undertake this role and to shape the OU’s commitment to encouraging female Orthodox leadership for the next century, and to enhancing the Orthodox experience for women across the continuum of Jewish life.” Allen Fagin served on the search committee along with OU Officers Etta Brandman Klaristenfeld, Barbara Lehmann Siegel, Dr. Marian Stoltz-Loike, Esther Williams and OU President Moishe Bane, who was responsible for forming the committee. “We want to create a department that meets the challenges religious women face and will continue to face in the 21st century. Whether spiritual, professional or health-related challenges, we wanted to ensure that Orthodox women have all the resources they need,” said Etta Brandman Klaristenfeld, member of the OU executive committee and an attorney at Stroock & Stroock & Lavan. “We envision the Women’s Initiative as being a center of innovation, integration and growth for women in the Orthodox community,” agreed Marian Stoltz-Loike, Dean, Lander College for Women, and an expert on diversity and work-life issues. The OU will implement the department’s new programs and initiatives through its extensive network of hundreds of OU synagogues, more than 200 NCSY locations, Yachad’s 12 regional chapters, and OU-JLIC’s 24 campuses, as well as engaging and partnering with local communal and national institutions. Some of the many initiatives that the OU hopes to implement within this new

Rebbetzin Dr. Adina Shmidman will be leading the Department of Women's Initiatives

department include: Defining Leadership Roles: Fostering community dialogue with a view toward developing guidelines for synagogues that encourage employment of women in senior professional positions in synagogues, with appropriate titles, compensation and benefits that reflect the dignity and significance of such roles. Lay Leadership and Training: Encouraging and cultivating women to take on significant roles within the community by providing professional development training and facilitating women serving on boards of synagogues and in other leadership positions within local and national communal organizations. Community Learning Groups: Engaging women in regular, weekly or monthly group learning programs that provide regular contact and an exchange of ideas with other women in their local communities. Female Scholars: Facilitating scholars-in-residence series - regardless of synagogue size - that give women teachers and scholars greater opportunity to share their teaching with broader audiences. High-level Torah learning: Devising continuing learning opportunities for women, including midrasha programs and yimei iyun. Youth: Enhancing the spiritual in-

volvement of young women in our synagogues through mother/daughter weekly learning programs and other initiatives. Wellness: Partnering with other organizations to develop a platform of courses and forums devoted to women’s health and well-being. Community Feedback: Conducting surveys and holding focus groups across the country geared to identifying the ever-changing needs of our communities, large and small, metropolitan and suburban. Synagogue Usability: Sharing best practices for synagogues to encourage female involvement in all aspects of synagogue life, including having the ezrat nashim [women’s section] exclusively available to women at all times of day and the redesign of synagogue spaces to make them “user-friendly” for all congregants. Think Tank: Establishing a think tank of women representing the diversity of the female Orthodox constituency that seeks to focus our resources and identify needed programming and resources for women, regardless of age or marital status. “The OU has included women in its most senior professional and lay leadership roles for quite some time. We believe that the Women’s Initiative can establish an even more robust pipeline of leadership talent,” said search committee member Esther Williams. “It is critical that our communities’ women be inspired, engaged and growing in their avodat Hashem,” said OU Executive Committee member and Senior Vice President, attorney Barbara Lehmann Siegel. “We applaud the OU for its leadership in seizing this opportunity to assure that this crucial goal becomes a reality.”


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Around the Community

Boca Raton Synagogue Kicks off Jewish Education Scholarship Fund Annual Campaign JESF’s 7th Annual Poker Tournament Scheduled for November 16th (Boca Raton, FL) Boca Raton Synagogue (BRS) kicks off their annual campaign in support of the its Jewish Education Scholarship Fund (JESF). Since being established in 2012, JESF plays a crucial role in enabling many families to keep their children enrolled in local Jewish Day Schools by bridging the gap between what families can afford and what financial aid the schools can provide. The months leading up to a school year is a very anxious time for many parents uncertain on how they are going to be able to afford day school tuition. Rabbi Efrem Goldberg, Senior Rabbi at Boca Raton Synagogue (BRS), who established the JESF, is proud of the many families it has been able to help. Rabbi Goldberg stated, “Although we have been able to assist many families, the needs continue to outpace the Fund’s resources. The number of families who request assistance continues to increase as well as the amount needed to bridge their family’s financial gap.” Rabbi Goldberg continued by saying, “Our local schools do a tremendous job in the tuition assistance they offer, which is in the millions of dollars. However, with more families in need, the amount that schools can offer each family or student is reduced.” JESF is a community-wide initiative as it has helped families whose children

attend all of the local Jewish community schools: Beth Jacob High School, Donna Klein Jewish Academy, Hadar High School for Girls, Hebrew Academy Community School, Ivdu School, Katz Hillel Day School, Katz Yeshiva High School of South Florida, Mesivta of Coral Springs, Rohr Bais Chaya Academy, Torah Academy of Boca Raton and Yeshiva Tiferes Torah of Boca Raton.  The Fund has grown over the years from assisting 19 families for the 2012-2013 school year, the Fund’s first year, to assisting over 30 families during the 2016-2017 school year. The needs for the current 2017-2018 school year are even greater.  Rabbi Goldberg firmly stated, “There are legitimate reasons to have to leave a Jewish day school, but money should not be one of them. A formal Jewish education is a necessity, not a luxury, and every Jewish child deserves a chance at one.” Rabbi Goldberg reminds the community, “Helping the youth of our community is not the job of schools alone or of other parents who happen to have their children in the same school.  It is the job, responsibility, and halachic (Jewish law) obligation of each and every one of us alike, whether we have young children at home or are empty nesters.  No donation is too small.” While the amount of

Along with the exciting poker tournament, makes for a great evening out

Lavish buffet spread - steaks, single malt scotch, and fine cigars

scholarship offered each family through JESF varies based upon a number of criteria, JESF roughly subsidizes each student with an average of $1,800 in aid. The JESF pays the schools directly on behalf of specific children.  The fund has zero administration or overhead costs. Every single penny that is donated goes directly towards enabling the community’s children to remain in their school. As one component of the campaign, JESF will be hosting their 7th Annual “All In 4 Education Poker Tournament” on Thursday, November 16th at a very unique venue, described by previous participants as the “Ultimate Man Cave”, and will only be disclosed to attendees.  Along with the Texas Hold ‘Em Tournament, attendees will be treated to lavish food, single malt scotch and fine cigars. $1,000 gets you a seat at the table, with $180 getting you

in door to enjoy the delicacies.  Sponsorships are also available.  The Tournament is seeking in-kind donations (travel, electronics, event tickets) that can be used for tournament prizes. The tuition crisis is an identified problem that continues to be discussed on national and local levels.  However, until a big picture project is developed and achieved, there remains a very real and present need locally. To find out how you can help through the JESF or are interested in attending or sponsoring the All in 4 Education Poker Tournament, contact Linda Gordon at 561.394.0394 or  linda@brsonline. org.  Donations can be made online by visiting brsonline.org/donate (select RDFJESF from the drop down menu.)

Yeshiva Toras Chaim Toras Emes Community Learning Programs Inspire Attendees YTCTE is fortunate to have a talented staff of rebbeim eager to impart their knowledge and love for Torah and mitzvos. However, these dedicated rebbeim do not just teach our children, they share their extensive knowledge and passion with the local communities who have welcomed them into their homes and hearts with much excitement. In this regard, Rabbi Yaakov Moskowitz, a popular eighth grade rebbe in YTCTE’s Rohr Middle School with many years of experience in adult education, has begun a series of community shiurim that have been well-received by all. His first community series was for men and women in Bay/Bal Harbour. The first class, on August 31, was hosted by Moshe and Esther Sitbon of Bay Harbour and was titled “Uncover the Secret to a successful Rosh Hashana.” This class focused on Hashem’s love for all of us and his desire for us to be close to him. Rabbi Moskowitz explained that if we treat others with care and concern, Hashem will in-turn act with care towards each of us. The second class, which was delayed due to Hurricane Irma, was held on September 27, gra-

ciously hosted by Aaron and Tammy Attias in Bal Harbour. Its title, “The Power of YOUR Prayer,” highlighted the power inherent in each individual’s tefillos. The many attendees shared how they were truly inspired for this holiday season and how engaging Rabbi Moskowitz’s shiurim were. Mrs. Sitbon enthused, “Rabbi Moskowitz’s shiur left us speechless and ready to approach the Yomim Noraim with a different point of view. His fresh and unique way of teaching was a true inspiration.” Rabbi Moskowitz second learning program was for a women’s group, The Ladies Lunch ’N Learn, in Presidential Estates. This event was hosted by Mrs. Anita Benhamou on September 26, and was ti-

tled “Uncover the Secret to a Successful Judgement.” The women felt that Rabbi Moskowitz was uplifting and inspiring as he engaged everyone in his unique way. Mrs. Chava Mann summed it up well when she explained, “Rabbi Moskowitz’s classes transmit deep concepts in a pleasant, entertaining manner. He is an amazing teacher who is able to involve the most diverse crowd and walk them through concepts of Torah and mitzvot. Everyone feels welcome.” In summation, Mrs. Tammy Attias expressed the thoughts of many. “We are blessed to have Rabbi Moskowitz teaching our boys in Rohr Middle School and also giving shiurim to parents in different communities.” Indeed, Yeshiva Toras Chaim

Toras Emes appreciates its responsibility to not only educate each student according to his or her own ability, but to also provide the parents with the tools and resources they need to inspire them and guide them as they build their Torah-true homes and communities. The Yeshiva looks forward to continuing to offer additional exciting community learning programs in the near future. To bring a lecture series or program to your neighborhood or for general information regarding upcoming scheduling feel free to contact ymoskowitz@ytcteam. org.


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OCTOBER 26, 2017 | The Florida Jewish Home

Around the Community

South Palm Beach County Rebbitzens to the Rescue Cook for Sukkot in the Keys As preparations for Sukkot got underway in South Palm Beach County, Jewish residents eagerly anticipated celebrating with their families and friends. That’s when concern for another community was raised by a caring group of high school students – which led to a whole new local effort to help a Jewish community ravaged by Hurricane Irma. “As soon as our students found out how their peers at two other Jewish Day Schools in Boca had gone to Key West with saws, rakes and other yard tools to help clear downed trees and clean up at a synagogue and homes damaged by Hurricane Irma, they wanted to know how they, too, could help,” said Rebbitzen Michal Schochet, Judaic Studies Principal of Hadar High School for Girls in Boca Raton. Rebbitzen Schochet quickly contacted Rabbi Josh Broide of the Deborah and Larry D. Silver Center for Jewish Engagement at the Jewish Federation of South Palm Beach County, where he has been at the center of hurricane relief generating from the community. A call to Rebbitzen Chanie and Rabbi Yaakov Zucker at Chabad of Key West determined that all the shul’s frozen holiday food had thawed and spoiled, neither the Chabad nor the Zuckers had a working kitchen, and they couldn’t even count on finding eggs at the supermarket. Only a few hours later, on a conference call, South Palm Beach County’s Rebbitzens (women married to Orthodox rabbis and who fulfill their own leadership roles) decided to employ not chainsaws, but a different set of tools – in their kitchens. Together, they would see that those who had been through so much in Key West would be able to enjoy the holiday in the way they do every year – with homecooked meals. “We felt terrible thinking how they wouldn’t be able to cook what they needed for the holiday,” said Leora Cohen, a student at Hadar. “So we wanted to be sure they would have delicious meals.” In the middle of their own holiday preparations, the rebbitzens decided to

Rebbitzen Michal Light & Crew

Rebbitzen Jennifer Gibber & Crew

cook all the meals needed for what Chabad of Key West had planned before the storm – dinners to be served at the shul for 100 people on the first night, and for 50 people on the five subsequent evenings. Only a couple of days later, what Broide calls “an army of shoppers” arrived at Grove Kosher Market in Palms Plaza at Boca Del Mar, where Broide heard Shlomo Goldman assure that “no one will go hungry on my watch.” With the help of the Jewish Federation of South Palm Beach County, the store’s generous discounts and some individual contributions from near and far, the ingredients left the project’s designated checkout lane for the homes of more than a dozen rebbitzens. At the rebbitzens’ homes, with students from their day schools, FAU and Palm Beach State College, as well as congregants, colleagues and friends, over two days they produced 350 festive, multicourse holiday meals. After a short stay in the freezers at Boca Raton Synagogue, the meals along with challahs headed to Key West in a refrigerated truck through the donated services of Uniform Security

Rebbitzen Rebecca Hochman & crew

Rebbitzens Shira Englander and Rina Lanner & loading crew

Rabbi Josh Broide, Rabbi Moshe & Rebbitzen Michal Schochet

Rebbitzen Rivka Denburg

Rebbitzens Yocheved Goldberg and Rivka Liberow, shopping at Grove Kosher Market

Agency, Golden Apple and the Islamorada Beer Company. “When I received the initial request, I wondered ‘how can I add possibly add this to such a busy schedule,’” said Rebbetzin Rivkah Denburg of Chabad of Central Boca Raton, whose kitchen served as one of the preparation sites. “But then I thought ‘no, this is too important, we can do this.’” I sent out a text and got an immediate response from women wanting to know what they could do to help. We planned, we shopped, we cooked, we delivered, all in just a few days.” “Our students at Hadar felt so good about their work helping others for the holiday, and we felt wonderful opening our kitchens. Meeting new women and knowing we were working together for the same goal across the community was amazing,” said Rebbetzin Schochet. “It was so special and appropriate for this time of year to come together and experience how one community can help another without knowing them,” said Rebbitzen Jennifer Gibber of Boca Jewish Center/Shaarei Tefillah, who also opened her kitchen for the project. “By involving young ladies from our congregation, they got to see they are part of a whole world of Jews who are there for each other in times of need.” “Sukkot is a holiday of joy and happiness, and this year as we celebrate in

Rebbitzen Simone Broide and Boca Women Inspired

our own sukkahs, our joy is far greater in knowing it is shared with our fellow Jews in Key West who have been through so much,” said Rabbi Broide. “Everyone we approached jumped right in, showing once again how our remarkable community comes together for those who need us.” Rabbi Broide expresses his deep gratitude for the project coming together so quickly and so successfully, through the efforts of those mentioned above, as well as: Rebbitzens Veeta Abramchik, Simone Broide, Chani Bukiet, Rivkah Denburg, Shira Englander, Jennifer Gibber, Yocheved Goldberg, Rebecca Hochman, Rina Lanner, Rivka Liberow, Michal Light, Arielle Moskowitz, Chana Reeva Opoczynski, Ruth Rabovsky, Cheli Schloss and Michal Schochet; and to Lysee Stein, Michal Marcus, Boca Women Inspired and Rabbi Shuey Biston. Further thanks to the Jewish Federation of South Palm Beach County; Ron Gallatin, Summer Faerman and Hands on Tzedakah; Key West transportation providers Moishe Applebaum and Adam Liebowitz, Uniform Security Agency, Golden Apple and Jose Herrera of Islamorada Beer Company, and all of the volunteers who jumped in to help.


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Florida Governor Visits Katz Hillel Community School; Proposes Funding for School Security Governor Rick Scott Proposes Additional Funding for School Security at visit with Teach Florida and Katz Hillel Community School in Boca Raton, Florida In a visit arranged by Teach Florida, Governor Rick Scott announced his recommendation for increased funding of nonpublic Jewish school security at Katz Hillel Day School of Boca Raton on October 16, followed up with a similar announcement in Orlando October 19 at the Roth Family JCC. Scott announced a $1 million proposed allocation for 2018-19, up from $654,000 this year. “I know many Floridians have been horrified by the threats against our Jewish schools and communities last year. We have absolutely zero tolerance for these hateful and anti-Semitic acts and our state has taken important action to keep our students and families safe,” said Governor Scott. Daniel Adler, a board member at the school and vice chairman of Teach Florida thanked Governor Scott saying, “With

Gov Scott at Katz Hillel with Rabbis and Guests

increasing hate and anti-Semitic incidents around the country, it’s powerful for us to know that we have your support.” The proposed funding will cover hardening school security, such as cameras, shatter proof windows and fencing. The Governor’s care for children was evident not just through the proposed funding. As he entered the grounds among hundreds of children holding handmade signs, Governor Scott shook hands, crouched down to sign banners, flags and even one student’s cast, and praised the students. “Teach Florida welcomes Governor

Gov Scott with Sign and 8th grade

Scott’s strong support of safe schools for all students,” said Mimi Jankovits, executive director of Teach Florida. “Together with the legislature, we are proud to live in a state that immediately stepped up to help secure students in face of increased anti-Semitism and hate crimes.” Teach Florida is bringing Jewish schools, parents and the community together to advocate for fair government funding of Jewish nonpublic schools to give children the best, safest and most affordable education possible. Through

Governor Scott Greets Katz Hillel Students

its efforts, more than $20 million in state scholarship funding is helping 2700 children attend Jewish schools in 2017-18. Our advocacy efforts also resulted in first time state security funding of $654,000 for Jewish schools. It’s easy to be part of the effort to the tuition and security problems. For more information, contact Mimi Jankovits, Executive Director, at mimij@ ou.org or teachflorida@gmail.com Or by phone at (954) 406-6336.

Governor Rick Scott Makes Major Announcement At Katz Hillel Day School Of Boca Raton The KHDS had the honor of hosting Governor Rick Scott on October 16 during a visit to highlight his strong support of government funding for Jewish non-public school security. This was a special opportunity for our school community to show appreciation for his approval of a first time security grant of $654,000 for our schools in this year’s budget, and for his deep commitment to the safety and well-being of our students and community. He also announced that he is proposing to allocate $1 million for security funding for Florida Jewish Day Schools for the 2018-2019 budget. This funding would be available to all Florida Jewish Day Schools and other at-risk schools to help provide security and counter-terrorism upgrades such as video cameras, fences, bullet-proof glass, alarm systems and other safety equipment. The visit was organized in partnership with Teach Florida, a project of the OU Advocacy Center, that brings together Jewish schools and the community to advocate for safer, better and more affordable Jewish schools. This year, more than $19.5 million in security and scholarship funding from state programs is supporting our schools and families to give all 10,000 Jewish students statewide a safe,

quality education. Kudos to our very own Treasurer/Executive Board Member, Daniel Adler, who has been one of the most influential local forces in making all this happen. We also acknowledge Joe Sharp, KHDS Executive Director, and Mimi Jankovits, Florida Regional Director of the OU Advocacy Center, for their hard work and commitment to this important funding.

As the Governor arrived at the Milton B. Katz Campus he was greeted by students displaying posters welcoming and thanking him for his support. Governor Scott shook hands with many KHDS students and faculty as he headed toward the Beit Midrash where the announcement was made followed by a press conference. Middle School students were present during the speaking engagement. KHDS

is very proud that our school was chosen for this great honor. Katz Hillel Day School of Boca Raton is a modern Orthodox Zionist day school, educating over 500 students from age 2 through 8th grade. For more information call 561-470-5000 or visit the website at www.hilleldayschool.org.


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OCTOBER 26, 2017 | The Florida Jewish Home

My Child’s Vision By Aliza Sakowitz MS, OTR/L & Nechama Turk MS, OTR/L Why Vision is So Important Vision is one of the most important senses. It allows us (with our entire sensory system) to adapt to our environments. It permits us to act on, manipulate, mold, and improve our environments. Vision allows us to anticipate situations, plan ahead, and increase success. For example, we look out of the window and see it’s raining, so we bring a raincoat, umbrella, rain boots and drive instead of walk somewhere. We leave extra time to do our tasks because we know sometimes there’s traffic or things take longer in the rain. Our visual input dominates our other senses. One of the roles of vision is to take us further into and size up our environment, which is vital to our daily functioning. It is no wonder that when our vision is in some way impaired, it impedes our overall activities. When a child in a classroom has poor vision, input is processed slowly which makes it difficult to navigate his environment, socialize, and complete assignments which results in changes in decision making. How can a child be ex-

pected to learn a subject when the teacher uses mostly visual-aids and the student is sitting too far for her to see comfortably? She can be a bright student that would normally be quick to learn things, but she doesn’t have the basic ability to SEE what the teacher is talking about? Have you ever lost a contact? It’s very disorienting socially. We rely on gestures and non-verbal communication and when a child doesn’t have the ability to determine the social environment; she may react in a shy manner, act inappropriately, or completely clam up for fear of making a social blunder. A Few Visual Impairments You May Notice in the Classroom Visual acuity- Ability to see far distances (whiteboard), intermediate distances (a computer screen), and close up (reading from a textbook) Visual field deficit- inability to see from part of the eye Visual attention- ability to decipher between relevant and irrelevant informa-

tion Visual Scanning- ability to move eyes from side to side/ up and down smoothly Visual Memory- Inability to create mental images based on previous information Eye-hand coordination- Ability to visually receive information and guide motor actions using the hand   What This Looks Like in Our Children Unfortunately, too often undetected visual deficits are often misdiagnosed as a cognitive problem or ADHD. An OT may be treating the child for a cognitive issue when there may not be an issue in that area. The child should be receiving OT to help correct and learn ways to accommodate to visual disturbances. Sometimes the child is too young to explain why he is unable to complete tasks in school or why he isn’t doing well on tests. Most times he is unaware that his classmates see things differently or that there’s an issue and he may begin to believe the diagnoses being assigned. Often the student has difficulty reading. The answer can simply be a visual disturbance of some sort that can be easily corrected! Because of this, is recommended to have a visual screening prior to or in conjunction with a full cognitive and perceptual evaluation.

What You Can Expect Next A referral will be made to an Ophthalmologist or Optometrist if there is impaired visual acuity and an occupational therapist can help adjust the environment and speak to teachers and parents about how to accommodate and optimize learning. The OT will work with the student to customize treatment to improve function in the classroom. For example, the OT can teach the student tricks of how to read quickly and stay on pace, know which visual things to focus on, practice eye hand coordination, and instill visual memory techniques. School is a place where a lot of things are picked up for the first time. Certain things are more noticeable during school hours and during school tasks. A child may be able to function well at home, but at school has a hard time seeing the board, is missing things, struggling socially and having a hard time reading. Listen to your children’s teachers and also be your child’s advocate. Catching a vision-related issue early can help your child have the successful school career they are prepared for and deserve. Aliza Sakowitz, MS, OTR/L and Nechama Turk, MS, OTR/L are occupational therapists with a passion for helping children develop and thrive in their home and school environments. They can be reached at AlizaSakowitz@gmail.com and NechamaTurk@gmail.com.

Sha'arei Bina

Admissions Open House for Middle & High School Students

Sunday, November 12, 2017 / 23 Cheshvan 5778 10 am-12 Noon 2907 Taylor Street, Hollywood, FL 33020

P lease join us

for an experiential educational journey through the eyes of our administration, faculty, students, parents and alumni

Rsvp

Your Response is requested for security purposes by 11.7.2017 Please call the school office at 954-927-5544 or email us at office@shaareibina.org and tell us that you and your daughter(s) will be attending.


The Florida Jewish Home | OCTOBER 26, 2017

31

Psychology Today

Relationship Counseling Dr. Yaakov Siegel There is a subset in the field of psychology called Relationship Counseling. This involves working with parties in human relationships, helping them to recognize, and better manage, their differences and repeating patterns. This form of counseling may involve members of a family or a couple, employees and employers in a workplace or any other number of relationships. Couple’s therapy may differ from other forms of intervention in both its duration and approach. Short term counseling may be between 1 and 3 sessions whereas long term couples therapy may be between 12 and 24 sessions. Most forms of counseling tend to be focused on the present, on developing new behavior and thinking patterns and coping strategies. When working with couple’s, the focus often shifts to feelings, past experiences and the source of learned behaviors.

Relationship counseling as a discrete, professional service is a relatively recent phenomenon; it wasn’t until the 1950s that therapists began treating psychological problems in the context of the family. Until the late 20th century, the work of relationship counseling was informally fulfilled by close friends, family members, or religious leaders while psychiatrists, psychologists and professional counselors dealt with individual problems from a medical or analytic model. That changed as a result of both advances in psychological research and understanding as well as the evolving complexity of human relationship and individual needs in the most wealthy society this planet has ever known. Before a relationship between individuals can begin to be understood, it is important to recognize and acknowledge that each person has a unique personality, perception, set of values and history. Indi-

viduals in the relationship may adhere to different and automatic value systems that is far from even their own awareness. The focus of relationship counseling is conflict resolution – to develop skill at handling challenging situations and the ability to adapt to challenging and unfamiliar experiences. Almost every relationship is strained at some time and this can result in reinforcing “negative interaction cycles.” There are many factors that contribute to unhealthy relationships including insecure  attachment, ego, arrogance,  jealousy, anger, greed, poor communication or primitive problem solving. Changes in situations like financial state, physical health, and the influence of other family members can have a profound influence on the behavior, responses and actions of the individuals in a relationship.Relationship influences are reciprocal: it takes each person involved to make and manage problems and if one changes, the relationship – by definition – morphs accordingly. One of the most effective solutions to problems and a primary way to set relationships back on track is to revamp the individuals’ perceptions and emotions how they look at and respond to situations. Perceptions of and emotional responses to a relationship are contained within an unconscious mental map that leads to subjective interpretations of events that occur

within the relationship. These assumptions and beliefs can be exposed, explored and discussed openly. The core values they comprise can then be understood and respected or changed. When successful, this results in each person taking equal responsibility for awareness of the problem as it arises, of their own contribution to the problem and the commitment to make fundamental changes in how they think and feel. Relationship counseling is a topic of enormous breadth and scope, filling volumes and this column certainly can not do justice to even an introduction. The message is that difficulties in relationships are normal and expected – because people are very different. But there are known and proven methods of resolving conflict that have been shown to work. So there is no reason to despair.

Dr. Siegel is a licensed psychologist in private practice. He has held positions in Federal and State institutions providing clinical services and psychological assessment.  He also served as clinical coordinator at an addiction center where he supervised and trained staff.   Dr. Siegel can be reached at 732-8061513 or drsiegel@siegelpsychological. com

CHANUKAH FAIR & OPEN HOUSE Hillel Day School of Boca Raton’s

Sunday, December 17, 2017 ~29 Kislev 5778 1:30pm - 4:00pm

Exciting Rides Carnival Bounce Houses Games Food Arts & Crafts and much, much more!

Camp Ruach Summer 2018 June 18 - August 9, 2018

*Free giveaways and a chance to win 1 FREE week of Camp with registration! *(during Open House & Fair hours only)

Brand new pool on campus!

Blood Drive

in memory of Carrie Amanda Janock

1:00pm-4:30pm

All blood donors will receive a fleece blanket and a wellness checkup.

Ride Tickets

Adults Free $5 per child $20 maximum per family

Entertainment for families with students of all ages! Come meet our administration! Personal tours of the school will be available.

Katz Hillel Day School of Boca Raton is a modern Orthodox Jewish day school offering programs for ages two through 8th grade.

THIS IS A COMMUNITY EVENT!

21011 95th Avenue S., Boca Raton, FL 33428 www.hilleldayschool.org hdscontact@hilleldayschool.org

561-470-5000


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OCTOBER 26, 2017 | The Florida Jewish Home

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NOT A BELIEVER IN TEHILLIM KOLLEL…. AFTER SON’S CANCER CURED, A BELIEVER!

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have seen those ads and read those stories. I never believed in them. It seemed too easy: pay some money and get miraculous results. Maybe it worked for other people, but not for me. Until… it was my son in the hospital. My son with cancer. My son fighting for his life. I felt so alone. So desperate. So hopeless. And I remembered those stories. And they gave me hope. And so I signed up my son with Tehillim Kollel, hoping that the miracles could and would apply to our family too, that they do indeed have a special zchus, as they davened at the holy sites of tzaddikim for our yeshua. Now, you may think we are just another story. But we are not. It’s real. My son. My son. My son was cured! And now, I not only believe. I know. The power of Tehillim is very personal and very real in my life.

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Parshas Lech Lecha

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Torah Thought

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‫בס"ד‬

D A I LY

OPERATIONS AROUND THE WORLD!

WILLIAMSBURG ‫ | ביהמ״ד דינוב‬MONROE ‫ציון הרה״ק‬ ‫ | מסאטמאר זצ״ל‬MIRON ‫ | ציון הרשב״י במירון‬YERUSHULAYIM ‫ | קבר שמעון הצדיק‬AMUKA ‫ | ציון רבי יונתן בן עוזיאל‬BEIT SHEMESH ‫ | קבר ָדּן בן יעקב‬TZFAS (1) ‫| ציון האר”י הקדוש‬ TZFAS (2) ‫ | ציון רבי לייב בעל יסורים‬TZFAS (3) ‫ציון רבי שלמה‬ ‫ | אלקבץ‬TEVARYA (1) ‫ | ציון של״ה הקדוש‬TEVARYA (2) ‫ציון‬ ‫ | רבי מאיר בעל הנס‬EIN ZEITIM ‫ציון רבי יהודה בר אלעאי‬ | ENGLAND ‫ | ציון הרה״ק משאץ זי״ע‬BELGIUM ‫ציון הרה״ק רבי‬ ‫ | איציקל ורבי יענקלע זצ״ל‬MONSEY ‫ציון הרה״ק מריבניץ זצ״ל‬

CONTACT TEHILLIM KOLLEL TODAY:

718.705.7174

info@TehillimKollel.org | www.TehillimKollel.org

By Rabbi Berel Wein

T

here is much comment and many different interpretations regarding the first two words of the second verse of this week’s Torah reading. The second word “lecha, for you” seems to be somewhat redundant in the construction of the sentence. Rashi therefore interprets it to mean “for your benefit and good.” The L-rd instructs Abraham to leave his homeland and family located in Mesopotamia in order to achieve the greatness that is inherent within him, as the forbearer of nations and the founder of the Jewish people.

the word “lecha” has a certain ominous characteristic to it. Abraham and Sarah were to be truly challenged by this travel experience. They were not going on vacation.  Abraham’s descendants, the Jewish people, have shared this test and challenge with him over our long history.  We always were insecure and homeless during the long night of our exile and dispersal. Even countries where Jews resided for centuries, such as Spain, Germany, Poland, etc., eventually no longer would accommodate our presence.  We were always a

You are not a visitor, a tourist, a traveler, but you are now a refugee, an alien, and a non-citizen.

There is an alternative interpretation of the use of this second word “lecha” in the verse that has always fascinated me. Travel can be a very broadening and entertaining experience. The travel industry the world over is bourgeoning as people crave to visit unseen shores and exotic locations. So why would the travel of Abraham and Sarah from Mesopotamia to the land of Canaan be considered by Jewish tradition to have been such a challenging test of Abraham’s faith on the Almighty? He simply was embarking on a travel experience and was one of many such travelers in his time and world. The answer lies in the fact that the word “lecha” implies permanence. Abraham, you are never going to return home to Mesopotamia again. You are not a visitor, a tourist, a traveler, but you are now a refugee, an alien, and a non-citizen.   And such a status in life is truly challenging and potentially dangerous. So, unlike the interpretation of Rashi,

positive part of any national society we found ourselves in but at the same time we were always the odd man out.  But somehow we were able to survive this enormous test and challenge because we always believed and knew that eventually we were going to go home.  We prayed for it to happen and we struggled against all odds and enemies to make it happen. And in our time it has happened.  This belief of the return to Zion and Jerusalem sustained us in our darkest hours. It transferred us in our minds, though not in the minds of others, from the status of tolerated but unwanted aliens into mere visitors and sojourners who have a legitimate and permanent home elsewhere. This is the feeling I have every time I present my Israeli passport for inspection when I travel to a foreign destination. I am no longer a pariah, a refugee but merely a visitor, a tourist, perhaps even an honored guest. The children of Abraham have returned home. Shabbat shalom.


The Florida Jewish Home | OCTOBER 26, 2017

33

Torah Thought How a Shabbos Meal Turned a White Supremacist Against Bigotry and How it Can Turn Your Hate to Love Rabbi Efrem Goldberg

The United States was hit by two types of disasters over the past number of weeks. One was natural, and the other was manmade.  One left devastating damage as the result of strong winds and hard rain, while the other left horrific damage resulting from hate and discrimination.  One caused hopelessness, while the other provides great reason to hope. Texas and Florida, the Houston community and in the Keys, continue to reel from the devastating and historic flooding that resulted from Hurricanes Harvey and Irma.  The loss of life, destruction of property, and displacement of people give tremendous reason for sadness and sorrow.  And yet, a sub-story of this disaster is how it has united a nation in the midst of experiencing distressing divide.  The whole country has not merely fixated its attention on the victims of Harvey and Irma as spectators, but has stepped up impressively to donate money, coordinate help, and plan for recovery efforts.  The images and videos of everyday people risking their lives to rescue others, and the stories of people opening their homes to take in now-homeless families, are not only heartwarming but are great reason to maintain faith in the goodness of people and hope in the future of our great country. While we certainly don’t welcome these hurricanes, the sense of unity it has generated and the basic goodness and kindness in man that it has elicited could not come at a better time.  Just two weeks before Harvey made landfall, a tsunami of hate hit America when neo-Nazis and white supremacists rallied in Charlottesville resulting in violence and even death.  The president’s failure to unequivocally and categorically reject these extreme groups and their racist and anti-Semitic agenda without qualification or comparison to others was celebrated by those very groups as a victory.  While he later clarified his condemnation of these hate and extremist groups, the damage of the moral ambiguity of his initial response had been done and caused many to have grave concerns about a growing divide in America. How can we heal from this sad and concerning episode?  What can we do to marginalize and ultimately eliminate these views?  How can we be hopeful when events make us feel hopeless?  We must examine our hearts and words for the pres-

ence of our own sense of supremacy over others and hate for those who are different than us. Obviously, we must stand for and with those who are the targets and victims of hate.  But must we accept that there are hateful people, or is there a way to actually change the minds of those who hold these views and eliminate hate, be it grounded in race, religion, politics or no reason at all? Derek Black was literally raised on hate.  His father, Don Black, was the

Derek is going to hate Jews, he might as well meet one and know more about them. Derek accepted the invitation and arrived with a bottle of wine. Nobody at the meal mentioned white nationalism or his involvement with its movement.  Derek enjoyed the meal and came back the next week and then the following one, until after a few months his fellow guests at the Shabbos meals became his friends.  Eventually, a strong enough relation-

Perhaps we can learn from Derek Black’s story that people are capable of change and that we shouldn’t give up hope founder of Stormfront, the internet’s largest white supremacist website, with over 300,000 users. His mother, Chloe, had previously been married to David Duke, who was Derek’s godfather. As a young man, Derek launched a popular white nationalist website for children and quickly became a leader in the greater movement.  When he spoke at a white supremacist conference, he was introduced as “the leading light of our movement.” When Derek enrolled in New College of Florida, a top-ranked liberal arts school, he kept his extremist views and KKK affiliation to himself, even while continuing to host his supremacist radio show.  One night in April 2011, a fellow student was Googling hate groups online when he came across Derek’s picture.  It didn’t take long for the word to get out and by the next semester he was a pariah.  Nobody would talk to him or even come near him and he avoided public places or events for fear of hostility given his views. One of Derek’s acquaintances started reading Stormfront and listening to Derek’s radio show to get insight into Derek’s thinking.  Then he did something radical, unexpected, and uncomfortable.  He texted Derek, “What are you doing Friday night?” The classmate was Matthew Stevenson, the only Orthodox Jew in the school.  He hosted weekly Shabbos dinners in his campus apartment and decided to invite Derek.  Though he initially debated if it was a good idea, he decided if

ship was built that the topic of his beliefs could come up. Conversations ensued in which Derek’s beliefs were challenged in a respectful way.  His assertions were challenged by data, studies, evidence, and facts and one by one they were dismantled leaving Derek increasingly confused.  He stopped posting on Stormfront and gave up his radio show.  By his final year of college, he was taking classes in Jewish scripture and feeling totally disconnected to white nationalists and their beliefs. After graduating, he decided to publicly disavow all that he had formally subscribed to and promoted, and he published a bold statement: A large section of the community I grew up in believes strongly in white nationalism, and members of my family whom I respect greatly, particularly my father, have long been resolute advocates for that cause. I was not prepared to risk driving a wedge in those relationships. After a great deal of thought since then, I have resolved that it is in the best interests of everyone involved to be honest about my slow but steady disaffiliation from white nationalism. I can’t support a movement that tells me I can’t be a friend to whomever I wish or that other people’s races require me to think of them in a certain way or be suspicious at their advancements.  The things I have said as well as my actions have been harmful to people of color, people of Jewish descent, activists striving for opportunity and fairness for all. I am

sorry for the damage done. When his father saw the post the next day, he told Derek, “You have been hacked.” Derek explained to his father that it was in fact real and was how he felt.  His father was in physical pain.  He felt betrayed.  Their relationship has been frayed and barely existent since then.  Derek went on to earn a Master’s degree and essentially build a new identity and life.  The young man who was once the heir to the mantle of leadership of the entire white supremacist movement became an outspoken opponent of racism, bigotry, anti-Semitism and hatred. How did it happen?  An invitation to a shabbos meal. The Torah endorses loving people.  On the other hand, it condones hating those who are evil.  How do we reconcile these two imperatives?  Rav Shneur Zalman of Liadi, the founder of Chabad, writes in his Tanya (32): “It is a mitzvah to hate them, and it is a mitzvah to also love them. Both are true. You hate the yetzer hara, the evil inclination that’s in them, and you love the goodness that is concealed in them, which is a spark of Godliness.” Perhaps the best way to persuade someone to abandon his beliefs is to reject only his beliefs but remain open to the Godliness and potential in him.  With the foundation of a relationship, genuine conversation can take place bringing with it the possibility of persuading someone to abandon or even reject what she had previously believed. I am not suggesting we invite members of the KKK for a Shabbos meal or that a bowl of chulent and piece of potato kugel can solve the challenges of bigotry and hatred in this country and others.  But, perhaps we can learn from Derek Black’s story that people are capable of change and that we shouldn’t give up hope even when someone subscribe to beliefs we find repulsive and abhorrent. While I wouldn’t recommend inviting neo-Nazis for a Shabbos meal, I strongly encourage you to invite into your home those in our own community with whom you disagree or even, God forbid, feel animus.  Never underestimate the power of a Shabbos meal to build a relationship, find common ground, and replace hatred with love. Rabbi Goldberg is the Senior Rabbi of Boca Raton Synagogue.


TJH

Centerfold

You gotta be kidding A baseball scout found a remarkable prospect – a horse that was a good fielder and that hit the ball every time he was up at bat. The scout got him a tryout with a big league team. Up at bat, the horse slammed the ball into deep left field and stood at the plate, watching it go. “Run!” the manager screamed, “Run!” “Are you kidding?” answered the horse. “If I could run, I’d be in the Kentucky Derby.”

Winner Speak Match the statement with the winner: A. Winning isn’t everything, it’s the only thing.

G. Competing at the highest level is not about winning. It’s about preparation, courage, understanding and nurturing your people, and heart. Winning is the result.

“"

B. I’ve missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.

C. I hated every minute of training, but I said, “Don’t quit. Suffer now and live the rest of your life as a champion.” D. Winning is the most important thing in my life, after breathing. Breathing first, winning next.

E. It kills me to lose. If I’m a troublemaker, and I don’t think that my temper makes me one, then it’s because I can’t stand losing. That’s the way I am about winning, all I ever wanted to do was finish first.

F. The person that said winning isn’t everything, never won anything.

H. Winning isn’t everything, but wanting it is. I. Yesterday’s home runs don’t win today’s games.

1. George Steinbrenner

6. Mia Hamm

2. Jackie Robinson

7. Babe Ruth

3. Joe Torre

8. Arnold Palmer

4. Muhammad Ali

9. Michael Jordan

5. Vince Lombardi

 Wisdom Key

Riddle me this?

What is the difference between a Yankee Stadium hotdog and a Citi Field hotdog? See answer to the right

Answer to Riddle: You can buy a Yankee Stadium hotdog in October. Ouch!

1.

OCTOBER 29, 2015 | The Jewish Home OCTOBER 26, 2017 | The Florida Jewish Home

A-5, B-9, C-4, D-1, E-2, F-6, G-3, H-8, I-7

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The Jewish Home | OCTOBER 29, 2015 The Florida Jewish Home | OCTOBER 26, 2017

World Series Trivia 4. When were the Dodgers last in the World Series before 2017?

1. Who is the only player to play in 75 World Series games? a. b. c. d.

a. b. c. d.

Yogi Berra Mickey Mantle Joe DiMaggio Phil Rizzuto

2. The Houston Astros played in one prior World Series in 2005 and were swept in four games. Who did they play in that series? a. b. c. d.

5. Who was clearly not the MVP of the 1986 World Series? a. b. c. d.

Braves Dodgers White Sox Marlins

Ron Darling Bill Buckner Roger Clemens Bob Stanley

a. Enter Sandman... Mariano Rivera b. Jeff Nelson c. John Wetteland d. Doc Gooden

Indians Tigers Yankees Braves

a. b. c. d.

1 2 3 4

8. Which pitcher threw a fourhit shutout to defeat the Giants in Game 7 of the 1962 World Series? a. b. c. d.

6. In the 1996 World Series, this pitcher had four saves for the Yankees, earning the MVP award:

3. Which team appeared in the World Series the most in the 1990s? a. b. c. d.

2006 1999 1988 1964

7. How many World Series rings does Joe Girardi have?

Whitey Ford Bill Stafford Ralph Terry Jim Bouton

9. Which one of these players never hit three home runs in a World Series game: a. b. c. d.

Babe Ruth Derek Jeter Albert Pujols Reggie Jackson

 Answers 5. B- In game 6 with the game tied, Mookie Wilson hit a dribbler up the 1st base line which should have

B

9.

C

8.

4. C 3.

 Scorecard

D- He was on the Yankees for their 1996, 1998 and 1999 wins and was the Yankee manager when they won in 2009.

7.

C- Mo was the set-up man in 1996.

6.

D C- If you are wondering how the 2005 World Series featured the Houston Astros, who are in the American League, against the Chicago White Sox, who are also in the American League, stop wondering: The Astros at the time were in the National League. They switched to the American League in 2013.

2.

A

1.

6-9 correct: You are a baseball MVP! 3-5 correct: Not bad. Well, actually, if you got 3 correct, you lose. If you got 5 correct, you win, with one to spare. 0-2 correct: You get the Bill Buckner award!

27 35

been a routine play to end the inning and put the Red Sox up to bat, but Bill Buckner had a Little League moment and the ball went right between his legs into the outfield. The Mets scored and won the game and went on to win the Series in the 7th game.


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OCTOBER 26, 2017 | The Florida Jewish Home

The Jewish Home | OCTOBER 29, 2015

19

Health & F tness

How to Boost Your Metabolism By Cindy Weinberger MS, RD, CDN

M

ost people want to be slim and look good. The problem is that keeping thin may not be so easy. While some people tend to be naturally thin while still eating whatever junk food they desire, others can diet and exercise regularly yet still struggle to lose weight. This difference can be blamed on the different metabolic rates of each individual. Those with faster metabolisms tend to be “luckier.” Those with slower metabolisms need to work a little harder to keep the pounds off. So the burning question is, how can you speed up your metabolism? 1. Drink plenty of water.

Drinking water generally substitutes sugary beverages, saving you those extra calories. Additionally, drinking water fills you up, leaving less room for extra snacks. Even more so, studies have actually shown that drinking water alone can help boost your metabolism. When your body feels even slightly dehydrated, your metabolism slows down. 2. Drink green tea. Green tea contains a substance called catechin which has been shown to boost your metabolism. The antioxidant poly-

phenols found in green tea help convert the fat stored in your body into fatty acids which can increase fat burning and has therefore been shown to increase your metabolism by 4-5%. Green tea is also very low in calories, and like water, drinking green tea will most probably substitute sugary beverages and fill you up, thus aiding in weight loss and weight maintenance.

should convince you to sit down and have a solid meal when you wake up. Eating a nutrient dense breakfast – like oatmeal with almonds and berries or an omelet with a slice of whole grain toast – within 1-2 hours of getting out of bed literally wakes up your metabolism. 5. Exercise. Burning fat during exercise helps speed

Ideally, you should be eating 5-6 small meals a day, rather than 3 large meals.

3. Drink coffee. You might feel that caffeine gives you the jitters. That’s because caffeine speeds up your metabolism by 5-10%. Caffeine increases the amount of energy your body uses. 4. Eat breakfast! You probably know by now that I’m a big fan of eating a good breakfast. Aside from the many benefits of eating breakfast, this alone

up your metabolism. This is true for all types of exercise – cardio workouts, high intensity interval training, and weight lifting. However, the higher the intensity, the better the results. Push yourself to do more intense workouts to get optimal results. 6. Eat spicy foods. Spicy foods not only add a kick of flavor to your food, they kick your metabolism into a


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OCTOBER 29, 2015 | The Jewish Home The Florida Jewish Home | OCTOBER 26, 2017

in between meals. Ideally, you should be eating 5-6 small meals a day, rather than 3 large meals. Eating more often helps speed up your metabolism. Don’t go more than three hours with eating. This doesn’t mean you should be stuffing your face every three hours. Eat three meals a day, plus three healthy snacks.

faster mode. Pepper contains a substance called capsaicin which is known to boost metabolism. Add chili powder or crushed red pepper flakes to your dishes, salads, and pizza. Even try adding some jalapeno peppers to your sandwiches and feel the quick results. 7. Get a good night’s sleep. Sleep deprivation is linked to obesity. This may be due to the fact that lack of sleep slows down your metabolism. 8. Eat your omega-3s. Omega-3 fatty acids balance blood sugar and reduce inflammation, thus helping boost your metabolism too. Salmon, herring, tuna, and flaxseeds are great sources of omega-3 fatty acids. 9. Eat small, frequent meals. Your body tends to slow down

10. Eat a lot of protein. Your body uses more energy to burn protein than it does to burn fat or carbohydrates. Thus, eating high protein foods help boost your metabolism. Good sources of protein include lean beef, turkey, fish, chicken, tofu, nuts, beans, eggs, and low-fat dairy products. To summarize, in order to boost your metabolism after a good night’s sleep, have a well- balanced breakfast. Then go for a high intensity

in the Jerusalem hills near Beit Shemesh

ORGANIZATIONS INTERESTED IN JOINING OUR COMMUNITY CHELKA PROGRAM, MAY CONTACT OUR OFFICE. For more information & to receive a free brochure of our services, please contact:

Avi Koenig Family Adviser

T: C:

718-437-2200 x104 929-246-0511

37

E:

avi@eretzhachaim.org

W: eretzhachaim.com

workout while staying hydrated with plenty of water. Don’t forget to have a healthy snack shortly after. About 2-3 hours later, sit down for a protein-filled lunch with green tea on the side. Continue with the pattern of having a small snack about 3 hours later while drinking plenty of water in between. Later, sit down for an omega-3-rich spicy dinner. Try not to eat past 8pm, as your metabolism tends to be slower at night. Head for bed at a decent time, wake up and

start all over again!

Cindy Weinberger MS, RD, CDN, is a Master’s level Registered Dietitian and Certified Dietitian-Nutritionist. She graduated CUNY Brooklyn College receiving a Bachelor’s in Science and Master’s degree in Nutrition and Food Sciences. She is currently a dietitian at Boro Park Center and a private nutrition consultant. She can be reached at CindyWeinberger1@gmail.com.


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OCTOBER 26, 2017 | The Florida Jewish Home OCTOBER 29, 2015 | The Jewish Home

Political Crossfire

The Rubble in Raqqa is a Reminder By David Ignatius

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ooking at photographs of the ruined, desolate streets of what was once the Islamic State’s capital of Raqqa is a reminder of the overwhelming, pitilessly effective military power of the United States. Perhaps it’s a tribute to the inevitable nature of American force, once it’s engaged, that the fall of Raqqa last week provoked so little public discussion. Commentators focused on whether President Trump had dissed the parents of America’s fallen warriors, but they barely seemed to notice that our military has achieved a goal that three years ago seemed distant and uncertain. The heaps of rubble in Raqqa that once housed terrorists and torturers convey a bedrock lesson, as valid now as in 1945: It’s a mistake to provoke the United States. It may take America a while to respond to a threat, but once the machine of U.S. power is engaged, it’s relentless – so long as the political will exists to sustain it. The Raqqa campaign is a reminder, too, of something we rarely see in these divisive days – the continuity of U.S. commitments from the Obama administration to Trump. Truly, it was a shared enterprise. Trump deserves credit for accelerating the campaign against the Islamic State and giving commanders more authority. But the basic strategy – and the will to resist the jihadists in the first place – was President Obama’s. A secure and confident Trump would invite Obama to the White

House to meet with commanders and troops returning from the battle. That would remind the world that America can keep its word, across administrations. Trump, still anxious about his authority, seems incapable of such generosity. Thinking back to the beginning of this campaign is to recall how fragile it initially seemed. The Islamic State exploded in the summer of 2014, overrunning Mosul and racing like a firestorm across the Sunni regions of

When Obama announced his goal to “degrade and ultimately destroy” the Islamic State, it sounded like an obtuse and conditional war aim. And it didn’t help that nobody agreed on a name for this enemy, variously called “ISIS,” “ISIL” and “Daesh.” America was hardly enthusiastic for the war after long, frustrating battles against Islamic insurgents in Iraq and Afghanistan. But Obama pushed ahead. The campaign got off to a slow start. Tribes in Iraq’s Euphrates Val-

The heaps of rubble in Raqqa that once housed terrorists and torturers convey a bedrock lesson, as valid now as in 1945: It’s a mistake to provoke the United States.

Syria and Iraq. The lines of defense buckled. The Kurdish capital of Irbil was in danger; so was Baghdad. As a precondition for American military involvement, Obama demanded a new government in Baghdad that would be less pro-Shiite sectarian and better able to win Sunni trust. He was right, and he got what he wanted in the replacement of Nouri al-Maliki as prime minister by Haider al-Abadi, who has had a steadier hand than Iraq-watchers initially predicted.

ley pleaded for American aid that was initially slow to arrive. The Iraqi military was a mess until the U.S.-trained Counter-Terrorism Service began to display real combat power. But gradually, mostly invisibly, the battle turned: U.S. airpower killed tens of thousands of recruits to the caliphate, obliterating anyone who raised a digital signal. The U.S. military said little about this harsh campaign, but Syrian and Iraqi fighters saw it, and people go with a winner.

Watching this battle unfold during multiple visits to Iraq and Syria, I saw two factors that changed the tide. First, the U.S. found committed allies. The toughest fighters initially were Kurdish, the KDP and PUK peshmerga militias in Iraq, and the YPG in Syria. They stood their ground and fought, and died. (This Kurdish loyalty is worth remembering now, in their time of troubles.) The anti-Islamic State alliance broadened as the Iraqi military got stronger, and YPG recruited Sunnis into a broader coalition dubbed the Syrian Democratic Forces. Victory came from marrying these committed fighters to America’s devastating firepower. The U.S. could dial in strikes from an array of platforms – drones, fixed-wing aircraft, advanced artillery. The ruin of Raqqa makes it look like we just pounded everything, and the U.S. needs to make a self-critical accounting of civilian loss of life. Honesty about the war’s human cost, and American responsibility for mistakes made in the fog of battle, is the best bridge to the future. The problem with this campaign from the beginning was that our military dominance was patched on top of political quicksand. That’s still true. Obama never had a clear political strategy for creating a reformed, post-Islamic State Syria and Iraq; neither does Trump. Our military is supremely effective in its sphere, but the enduring problems of governance, it cannot solve. (c) 2017, Washington Post Writers Group


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Good Hum r

Crucial Clips By Jon Kranz

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stronomers are fascinated with the Big Dipper. Dolphin enthusiasts are obsessed with the TV show “Flipper.” Notre Dame fans like to win one for the Gipper. Others, however, are more intrigued by the Clipper. No, not a Clipper from the Los Angeles Clippers of professional basketball or the Columbus Clippers of minor league baseball. The most intriguing Clippers are the Jews who fasten their skullcaps to their heads with a clip. No, I’m not talking about paper clips, money clips, movie clips or military instructions to Cancel Launch in Progress (CLIPs). I’m not talking about news clippings or lawn clippings and I’m also not talking about clipping someone’s wings or clipping someone on the football field. To be clear, I’m talking about clipping a kippah using one of those menschy metal kippah clips that desperately hold on to a yarmulka for dear life like a string holding a kite, like a rock climber gripping a jug-hold or like an infant clutching a pacifier. Many Jews take kippah clips for granted but they actually are a relatively new invention. For thousands of years, Jews had no such clips and that challenging period of time is referred to by most historians as the B.C.E. (Before the Clip Era). During the B.C.E., Jews resorted to wearing relatively large and heavy head-gripping kippot that did not require extra fastening. Eventually, however, the larger head-coverings fell out of fashion and some Jews transitioned to less massive kippot. This transition was made

possible largely by the creation of the game-changing bobby pin. (In the United Kingdom, a bobby pin is known as a hair grip, which also describes what happens when you fight with your siblings.) The bobby pin was invented after World War I and was named after the then-popular hairdo known as the “bob cut” (which is not to be

visible but the latest fad is to have the clips sown into the lining on the underside of the kippah, thus removing those unsightly clips from view. As a result, many kippah clips have become invisible heroes, always playing second fiddle and taking a backseat to the attention-grabbing, scene-stealing kippah. Yes, the kippah clip is to the kippah what

Yes, the kippah clip is to the kippah what Robin is to Batman and what Tanto is to the Lone Ranger.

confused with the “babka,” an arguably more important invention). Bobby pins are credited with saving thousands of flimsy yarmulkas from the most depressing and hopeless destination on the planet, the lost & found. When it comes to the lost & found, many enter but few leave. (The same could be said of retirees moving to Boca Raton.) Conversely, there is at least one place which has more people leaving than entering: a hospital delivery room. At some juncture, the bobby pin (like most of my wardrobe) went from being hip to homely, thus opening up the market for a trendy substitute, the modern-day kippah clip. (Hooray!) For many years, the shiny metal clips remained highly

Robin is to Batman and what Tanto is to the Lone Ranger. For kippah-wearing Jews, the kippah clip has opened a wide array of action-filled activities previously unapproachable for those worried about keeping their heads covered. Such activities include sky diving, trapezing and sleeping like a bat. Of course, these pursuits require several of those metal clips to keep the kippahs intact. That said, you are using far too many kippah clips if you set off airport metal detectors from the parking lot, if you routinely must dodge magnets flying right at you, or if you can conduct enough electricity to power your village. For those who do not wear skullcaps with clips, it may be difficult to

appreciate how critical the clips can be. Perhaps the best way to convey the importance of kippah clips is through song. So please, sing the lyrics below to my song, titled “Totally Clipped from the Start”: Turn around, every now and then I get a little bit tired of picking up my fallen kippah Turn around, every now and then I get a little bit worried that I’m gonna lose my best yarmulke... Turn around, Oy-Vey! Every now and then my lid falls off Turn around, Oy-Vey! Every now and then my lid gets lost And I need clips now, tonight And I need them more than ever And if I only clipped it tight I’d be wearing lids forever And I’ll never let my lids take flight Clips will never be wrong... Once upon a time I was losing my lids, but now my head is covered in part Nothing I can say, totally clipped from the start. Once upon a time I was losing my tops, but now I have the happiest heart Nothing more to do, totallyclipped from the start. Bottom line on the kippah topic: Loose (c)lips sink ships. Jon Kranz is an attorney living in Englewood, New Jersey. Send any comments, questions or insults to jkranz285@ gmail.com.


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OCTOBER 26, 2017 | The Florida Jewish Home JULY 13, 2017 | The Jewish Home

Madraigos

Love, Acceptance, and Effective Parenting Speaking with a Parenting Expert By Eli Perlman, LCSW, Clinical Director of Madraigos

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hursday morning in early May there was a slight breeze in front of The Coffee Bar as Brad stepped out of an Uber. After a brief welcome to New York, we sat down to discuss one of my favorite topics: parenting. Brad Reedy, who lives in Utah, is renowned for his book on parenting called, The Journey of The Heroic Parent. The book is a fantastic guide for helping parents strengthen their relationships with children while effectively parenting them. Between the lines, there is a palpable sense of an added wisdom that Brad has obtained through his life experiences. We spoke about many topics, and I was struck by Brad’s unique ability to simplify sophisticated psychological ideas so that even the most “un-psychological” person can apply his ideas into daily life. Over the years, Brad has taught many religious Jews effective parenting skills. He developed an apprecia-

tion and understanding of the Jewish religious community, primarily in New York. After speaking to Brad about parenting and learning of his fondness for the Jewish community, I was inspired to share Brad with our community as well. So last week, I conducted an interview with Brad to share with you. Here goes. Brad, thank you for agreeing to do this interview with us today. What set you on this journey and inspired you to become a parenting expert? It started with my own struggles as a child. Those experiences led me to want to work with young people. Eventually, I found myself working in a wilderness therapy program with children struggling with mental health and substance abuse issues. I began to see that helping, supporting and educating parents had a profound impact on the outcome of the chil-

dren. I also found that many people in the treatment field spoke about and to parents with derision and shame. I saw parents in their pain and wanted to offer a more compassionate approach. I observed how parents watched their children struggle, feeling powerless, and I wanted to spend my life supporting them.

project. I seek to replace anger and fear with curiosity. I try to separate communicating my feelings from behavior modification. I see the value in struggles and mistakes rather than only in the successes. Most importantly, I work at it. I make mistakes, say I am sorry and try to do better the next day.

In your parenting, what are the practices you share in common with your parents? Well, I share both positive and negative aspects. I struggle with patience. I am triggered to anger and frustration. I have significant anxiety when I see my child struggling. I have used guilting, shaming and tried to control outcomes with my children. And really, it is these struggles that have led me to seek for answers in parenting. On the positive side, I have learned to make my life my project rather than making my child’s life my

I appreciate your honesty and accountability in your parenting. Are there practices that your parents used when you were growing up that you kept away from when you became a parent? The first decision I made when my children were young was to not use spanking as a method of discipline. Second, I tried to avoid using guilt to modify behavior. Instead, I sought to understand my children and their acting out behaviors and tried to figure out what these behaviors might be trying to tell me. And mostly, I want


The FloridaThe Jewish Home | OCTOBER 26, 2017 Jewish Home | JULY 13, 2017

to “see” and “hear” my children and value them more than them fitting into my idea of what a child should be. You wrote a fantastic book named, The Journey of the Heroic Parent. What is a heroic parent? How does one know if he or she is a heroic parent? Actually, the following quote from Gandhi illustrates this better than I can. He says, “A coward is incapable of exhibiting love – it is the prerogative of the brave.” Projection, fusion, “going home” is easy; loving another’s otherness is heroic. If we really love the other, as other, we have heroically taken on the responsibility of our own journey. This heroism may properly be called love. Heroic parenting means you have the courage to look at yourself, your wounds, your contributions to the issues, your part of the “dance” and you are willing to grow. In your book, among other ages, you speak about parenting teenagers. Are there different parenting skills needed to parent an “average” teenager versus skills needed to parent a “difficult” teenager? The skills and concepts are virtually the same. Parenting is about capacity. That is, it takes great emotional and psychological capacity. The difficult part of parenting is the emotional energy that it requires. Essentially, the skills and concepts are the same, but children who struggle require more capacity, more energy on a parent’s part to maintain a compassionate, patient and curious stance. So, parents of children who struggle do need more resources and support, but in the end, the skills are the same for all children. You have been working with the Jewish religious community teaching parenting skills. Can you tell us your experience with this population with regard to parenting? I have found them to be open and hungry to find ways to be more effective. My experience has shown me how much the community loves family and children and that love is fueling their desire and willingness to

seek for more help. Many in the community talk about the stigma and the feelings of isolation, believing that they are alone. But, by the time I meet them and they are seeking help, they realize they are not alone and that

support and growth provides, they will make the time. Parents often say they wished they’d heard the message earlier. After participation, they often talk about how every aspect of their life is improved. The outcome of

“I want to ‘see’ and ‘hear’ my children and value them more than them fitting into my idea of what a child should be.”

parent education enhances their entire life, including their spiritual life. Speaking of religion, do you think parents connected to any religion have a different relationship with parenting than parents who are not connected to religion? I think parents connected to some religions struggle because of shame and guilt. They are often devoted and believe that their struggle may be an indictment on their spirituality. Sometimes, this feeling leads them to want to hide or even ignore the problem. But when they get desperate and seek help, they realize they are not alone and that usually improves their relationship to religion. Parents are often busy with work, responsibilities in the home, social engagements and, of course, their relationships with their spouses. Do you have any advice for these busy parents who struggle with finding time to properly parent their children? More than advice, I would simply invite them to give it a try. Resistance to participate in a growing process is usually communicated in this way – with reasons of not having time, etc. If they really need it, and it will benefit them and their children, they will make the time. So, responding to this is more of a discussion. I would listen to their concerns and resistance and help them overcome any anxieties or reluctance. If they get a taste of the sweetness that parent education

healthier parenting is joy, clarity, and liberation. Healthy parenting is its own reward. *

*

*

Over the past year, Madraigos has been providing educational and transformational parenting groups

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for parents of teens and young adults. Brad and his book, The Journey of the Heroic Paren,t have provided invaluable tools and attitudes about parenting. Many of these tools have been incorporated into our parenting groups. Stay tuned for a Madraigos event featuring Brad sharing his expertise and experience in parenting with our community. To find out more about our parenting groups and upcoming parenting events, contact Eli Perlman, clinical director at Madraigos, at 516-371-3250 ext. 111 or email to eperlman@madraigos.org.

Madraigos, a 501c-3 not-for-profit organization, offers a wide array of innovative services and programs geared towards helping teens and young adults overcome life’s everyday challenges one step at a time. Our goal is to provide all of our members with the necessary tools and skills to empower them to live a healthy lifestyle and become the leaders of tomorrow.

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OCTOBER 29, 2015 | The Jewish Home

The Art of the

IRAN DEAL What Trump’s Recent Announcement Really Means By Susan Schwamm

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s I have said many times, the Iran deal was one of the worst and most one-sided transactions the United States has ever entered into.” These words were said by President Donald Trump last Friday. And it’s true. He has been saying this time and time again. But this time, people are taking the president seriously. In a major speech at the White House, the leader of the free world threatened to pull out of the infamous Iran nuclear deal, agreed to by the United States and five other world powers with Tehran in 2015. According to the president, Iran has not been adher-

ing to the terms of the deal that was supposedly implemented to freeze and reverse Iran’s nuclear program. He urged Congress and U.S. allies to strengthen the agreement as he unveiled a tough and comprehensive new policy toward the Islamic Republic. Trump’s announcement was uncharacteristically not an off-the-cuff remark meant to make the Ayatollah and his minions scatter, quaking in corners of their mosques. The president had been weighing his decision on Iran for weeks. In fact, he had been facing intense pressure from European allies to keep the United States in agreement and maintain status quo. His national security advisors had encouraged him to

avoid completely withdrawing from the agreement. Their thinking was that leaving the deal would isolate the United States even more and give Iran a much-wanted to excuse not to reduce their nuclear stockpiles. But Trump, throughout his campaign, promised to remove the U.S. from the agreement. Since taking office, he has twice “certified” the deal but has told top advisors that he no longer wishes to do so, stating that the “certifications” appear to show the American people that he is committed to Obama’s folly. According to a person in the know in the White House, around July 17 was when things came to a head, with Trump making it known in “forceful,

not uncertain” terms that he was dissatisfied with options given to him regarding the deal. The president felt that his national security team – including Secretary of State Rex Tillerson, Defense Secretary James Mattis and National Security Adviser H.R. McMaster – weren’t on the same page as him to fulfill this critical campaign pledge. Even after certifying the deal in the summer, the president expressed in an interview that he would have preferred to decertify the agreement. And so, under intense pressure from Trump, the team got to work. On Friday, the president’s plan was revealed. The current proposal attempts to satisfy the president, his campaign promises, and those in the

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administration who want to keep Iran from going rogue. According to the Tillerson, “The president, on many occasions, talked about either tearing the deal up or fixing the deal, and he said many times, we got to fix this deal,” the secretary of state said on Thursday evening. “What we are laying out here, this is the pathway, we think, that provides us with the best platform to attempt to fix this deal.” “We may be unsuccessful, we may not be able to fix it and if we are not, then we may end up out of the deal,” Tillerson went on. “But I think what the president is saying, before I do that and just walk, look, we will try. We will try. We will go try to fix it. I think you are going to hear he is not particularly optimistic.” In Trump’s speech on Friday he accused Iran of committing “multiple violations of the agreement,” adding that Iran had “failed to meet our expectations in its operations of advanced centrifuges,” and “intimidated” international inspectors into not using their full authority. Trump also accused the Obama administration of lifting sanctions on Iran under the terms of the deal at a moment when the Iranian clerical regime was about to collapse. He also ordered U.S. intelligence agencies to mount a new assessment of Iran’s compliance. Trump announced that he would no longer make regular certifications that the lifting of sanctions under the deal had been in U.S. interests. “We cannot and will not make this certification,” he asserted. “We will not continue down a path whose predictable conclusion is more violence, more terror and the very real threat of Iran’s nuclear breakout. I am directing my administration to work closely with Congress and our allies to address the deal’s many serious flaws so that the Iranian regime can never threaten the world with nuclear weapons.” The president warned that the deal was plagued by “insufficient enforcement” and near total silence on the missile program. Some of the prohibitions in the agreement are set to end in 2025, including limits on the number of its centrifuges. Iran, which has always

The Jewish Home | OCTOBER 29, 2015

Missiles on display in Iran in front of a portrait of the Ayatollah Ali Khamenei

maintained that its nuclear program is for peaceful purposes and not for weapons, would not agree to a permanent freeze in its ability to enrich nuclear fuel. Trump has pointed out that there is no plan put into place to prevent Iran from racing towards nuclear armament once the 2025 deadline passes. Ultimately, the bottom line of Friday’s announcement was this: if Trump’s changes do not go through as proposed, the president stated that he would unilaterally kill the deal. “In the event we are not able to reach a solution working with Congress and our allies, then the agreement will be terminated. It is under continuous review and our participation can be canceled by me as president at any time.” This ultimatum seems to be a classic Trump move. After all, he is the one who penned the book, Trump: The Art of the Deal. But given the deep reluctance of the other parties – the UK, Russia, France, China and Germany – to renegotiate the agreement, Trump’s determination in dealing with Iran this way is not without risk. As Trump spoke, the Treasury Department issued a statement saying that it would designate Iran’s Islamic Revolutionary Guard Corps for new sanctions over its support for terrorist organizations throughout the Middle East. It did not, however, single out the powerful militia as a foreign terror organization through the State Department. Before the designation, the head of

the Atomic Energy Organization of Iran, Ali Akbar Saleh, warned that terming the guards as a terror group would be “tantamount to a declaration of war.”

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esponse to Trump’s announcement on Friday came swiftly. Though they avoided direct criticism of the American president, Prime Minister Theresa May of Britain, Chancellor Angela Merkel of Germany and President Emmanuel Macron of France said in a rare joint statement that they “stand committed” to the 2015 nuclear deal and that preserving it was “in our shared national security interest.”

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“The nuclear deal was the culmination of 13 years of diplomacy and was a major step towards ensuring that Iran’s nuclear program is not diverted for military purposes,” they added. Sigmar Gabriel, Germany’s foreign minister, wagged his proverbial finger at the president, saying that Trump was sending “a difficult and also from our point of view dangerous signal.” He said that the Iran deal, and other diplomatic achievements, were necessary “to convince countries like North Korea, and maybe also others, that it is possible to create security without acquiring nuclear weapons.” “Destroying this agreement would, worldwide, mean that others could no longer rely on such agreements — that’s why it is a danger that goes further than Iran,” he asserted. Iran, of course, condemned Trump and the United States. Appearing on

television, its president, Hassan Rouhani, denounced Trump and called the United States an outlier that had become “more lonely than ever” in the international community. Rouhani did not threaten to withdraw from the deal, but made it clear that he would not renegotiate the terms, either. “The statements of Mr. Trump are nothing but abuse and threats against the people of Iran,” he said. “An international agreement cannot be disregarded.”


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This, of course, comes from a country that routinely calls for the destruction of Israel and the United States at its rallies. Rouhani, who has significant political capital invested in the deal, assured his people that Trump does not have the ability to back out of the deal. “This is an international, multilateral deal that has been ratified by the UN Security Council. It is a UN document. Is it possible for a president to unilaterally decertify this deal? Apparently, he’s not in the know.” Federica Mogherini, the European Union’s top diplomat, echoed Rouhani’s sentiment: “The president of the United States has many powers — not this one,” she said at a news conference in Brussels. She added that there had been no violations of the agreement and that the world could not afford to dismantle an accord that “is working and delivering,” especially at a time of “acute nuclear threat,” referring to the standoff with North Korea over its nuclear program. Both Rouhani and Mogherini are correct in the fact that the deal was endorsed by the UN and is effectively not something that Trump can cancel. But the president of the United States can stop waiving nuclear sanctions at any point, causing the sanctions to come back into force. Moreover, U.S. law requires Trump to waive nuclear sanctions regularly, so as long as the president does not put pen to paper, the nuclear sanctions will come back. In effect, that would terminate the deal, whether the other partners like it or not. Iran’s Speaker of Parliament Ali Larijani threatened on Friday that Iran may withdraw from the nuclear agreement if the United States does. Speaking to reporters in St. Petersburg, Larijani acknowledged that quitting the deal was “a possibility” and said that if the U.S. does not implement the agreements reached when the nuclear deal was signed, nothing will remain of the accord. “If they act like it, then there will be hardly anything left from this agreement. So a new issue will arise on the international arena,” Larijani said. Kremlin spokesman Dmitry Peskov said Friday that it was “obvious” that any action by the U.S. to pull

out of the Iran nuclear deal will have “very, very negative consequences.” But not every country condemned Trump’s new policy. Praise came specifically from Israel, Saudi Arabia and United Arab Emirates. Israel’s Benjamin Netanyahu said that the announcement created “an opportunity to fix this bad deal” and was a sign of Trump’s determination to “boldly confront Iran’s terrorist regime.” Many will remember Net-

she said that America’s next step “is now in the hands of the United States Congress. The international community and the European Union with it has clearly indicated that the deal is and will continue to be in place.” Russia’s deputy foreign minister also spoke directly to lawmakers. “We want to hope that Congress will not take any dramatic steps which would effectively signify a collapse” of the deal, Sergei Ryabkov said.

Key members in the Iran nuclear deal, including EU representative Federica Mogherini, Iran Foreign Minister Mohammad Javad Zarif and Secretary of State John Kerry, in July 2015

anyahu’s showdown with Obama over his speech in Congress regarding Iran and the nuclear deal. Saudi Arabia, which is Iran’s arch nemesis as it plays on the other side of the Sunni/Shia divide, said it welcomed a “new U.S. strategy” toward Iran. Iran and Saudi Arabia have consistently waged a battle for supremacy in the delicate arena of the Middle East. The United Arab Emirates, which like Saudi Arabia is a predominantly Sunni Muslim country with a sizable Shiite minority, also said that it “fully supports” Trump’s stance on Iran. The rhetoric against Trump’s announcement from foreign nations was critical, although relatively mild since Trump has asked Congress to address changes in U.S. terms. As such, it’s now up to the legislative body to determine whether or not the United States will re-impose sanctions on Iran, essentially terminating the deal. Mogherini of the European Union appealed directly to Congress when

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rump has consistently accused Iran of violating both the letter and spirit of the law. For instance, on Friday, Trump pointed out that “the Iranian regime has committed multiple violations of the agreement. For example, on two separate occasions, they have exceeded the limit of 130 metric tons of heavy water. Until recently, the Iranian regime has also failed to meet our expectations in its operation of advanced centrifuges.” Since the agreement was reached, a mere two years ago, Iran exceeded the deal’s limit on heavy water, used especially as a moderator in nuclear reactors, at least twice, although the amount was by less than one percent. It endeavored to take advantage of fuzzy language in the agreement but was immediately caught by international inspectors; the other partners objected and forced Iran to come back into compliance. Iran also took advantage of ambiguous limits in the agreement – “roughly 10” advanced centrifuges

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– by operating slightly more than that number of centrifuges. David Albright, president of the Institute for Science and International Security, noted to Congress that “Iran has also built and operated more advanced centrifuges than it is allowed, and it has misused quality assurance limitations to conduct banned mechanical testing of advanced centrifuges.” Prior to the nuclear accord, signed in July of 2015 in a flurry of handshakes and smiles, there were two uranium enrichment facilities in Iran, Natanz and Fordo, where uranium hexafluoride gas was fed into centrifuges to separate out the most fissile isotope U-235. Low-enriched uranium, which has a 3%-4% concentration of U-235, can be used to produce fuel for nuclear power plants. But it can also be enriched to the 90% needed to produce nuclear weapons. In July 2015, Iran had almost 20,000 centrifuges. Under the agreement, Tehran was limited to installing no more than 5,060 of the oldest and least efficient centrifuges at Natanz for 10 years. Its uranium stockpile was set to be reduced by 98% to 300kg for 15 years. And it had to keep its level of enrichment at 3.67%. Research and development was only allowed to take place at Natanz and was limited for eight years. No enrichment was permitted at Fordo for 15 years, and the underground facility was directed to be converted into a nuclear, physics and technology center. The 1,044 centrifuges at the site had to produce radioisotopes only for use in medicine, agriculture, industry and science.

The Arak heavy water facility


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Prior to the nuclear deal, Iran had been building a heavy-water nuclear facility near the town of Arak. Spent fuel from a heavy-water reactor contains plutonium suitable for a nuclear bomb. World powers had originally wanted Arak dismantled because of the proliferation risk. Under an interim nuclear deal agreed in November 2013, Iran agreed not to commission or fuel the reactor. Instead, it agreed to redesign the reactor so it cannot produce any weapons-grade plutonium. All spent fuel had to be sent out of the country as long as the modified reactor exists. About 6 tons of heavy water was allowed to be retained to make medical isotopes. Iran was not able to build additional heavy-water reactors or accumulate any excess heavy water for 15 years. The nuclear agreement required Iran to allow inspectors to access any site anywhere in the country they deem suspicious. But the regime has time to allow for access. For the first 15 years of the agreement, Iran has 24 days to comply with any IAEA access request. If it refuses, an eight-member Joint Commission – including Iran – will rule on the issue. It can decide on punitive steps, including the re-imposition of sanctions. A majority vote by the commission suffices. Agreeing to these terms back in 2015 allowed billions of dollars to flow back into Iran’s coffers. Sanctions previously imposed by the UN, U.S. and EU in an attempt to force Iran to halt uranium enrichment crippled its economy, costing the country more than $160 billion in oil revenue from 2012 to 2016 alone. According to the deal, Iran stood to gain access to more than $100 billion in assets frozen overseas, and was able to resume selling oil on international markets and using the global financial system for trade. According to the accord, should Iran violate any aspect of the deal, the UN sanctions will automatically “snap back” into place for 10 years, with the possibility of a five-year extension.

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ow many are looking towards Congress to see how things will unfold. There, Republican Senators Bob Corker and Tom Cotton are leading an effort to

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change the Iran Nuclear Agreement Review Act to automatically restore sanctions on Iran if it crosses a number of red lines that their amendment would establish. The thought is that restoring sanctions suspended under the Iran nuclear deal is the most direct path to unraveling the accord. European partners in the deal have not been so enthusiastic about changing the deal; they have said they are open to negotiating separate deals with Iran but do not favor anything that would endanger the original agreement. And getting Iran to agree to new “red lines” won’t be easy. Tehran has consistently rejected any renegotiations. Its mission to the UN on Friday threatened, “Iran has many options on how to proceed and if necessary will terminate its commitment regarding this issue.” Last month, its foreign minister rejected extending the length or conditions of the accord, saying that Iran would

The Natanz nuclear facility in Iran

debate and take a vote. The president will need the “ayes” of all 52 Republicans and eight more Democrats. As such, Eurasia Group predicts that the “legislation could well morph into a

“In the event we are not able to reach a solution working with Congress and our allies, then the agreement will be terminated. It is under continuous review and our participation can be canceled by me as president at any time.”

consider changing the agreement only if the concessions it had already made — including giving up nuclear fuel — were reconsidered. According to Helima Croft, global head of commodity strategy at RBC, “Hence, such a red line, alongside demands for enhanced inspections and curbs on missile activity, could turn the [Iran Review Act] into a ‘poison bill’ that the Iranians would be unlikely to swallow. Such an Iranian rejection in turn could be the catalyst for Congress to reinstate the waived nuclear sanctions.” Working with Congress won’t be easy either. Solving things legislatively will require 60 votes to end

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softer version, leaving some room for consensus with the Europeans and Iran.” Most important when determining legislation will be firming up the U.S.’s objective when it comes to Tehran. If the United States wants to deny Iran the capability to develop a certain type of ballistic missile, then the red lines must be strong enough to dissuade Iran from carrying out multiple tests, which will prevent them from creating the data necessary to build a successful missile. Equally important will be the administration’s need to get its European partners to agree to a shared set of goals and strategy. France has

signaled its willingness to pressure Iran, and Britain could be the key to overcoming German stubbornness. But Iran will also be on the lookout for European friends, as corporations seek to reenter its markets, formerly closed to the European world. Iran has already begun the propaganda campaign against the United States on the global front. This weekend, Iranian Foreign Minister Mohammad Javad Zarif told CBS’s “Face the Nation,” “It’s withdrawing from everything. So people cannot trust anymore the word of the United States,” equating the United States’ withdrawal from UNESCO to the nuclear deal. Apparently, the U.S. is not a trusted partner in any deal.

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ow, Congress has 60 days to decide whether Iran will be slapped with sanctions lifted under the nuclear deal. Slowly the power play that began in July 2015 will begin to shift. What will the world look like in two months’ time? And, even more importantly, what will the world look like in a few years from now? Will Iran be holding the keys to a nuclear ballistic missile? Or will the United States have been able to effectively stamp out their nuclear ambitions? One hundred lawmakers will be submitting their support or opposition to Iranian sanctions in the coming days. Let’s hope they make the right decision.


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Dating Dialogue

What Would You Do If… Moderated by Jennifer Mann, LCSW of The Navidaters

Dear Navidaters,

I’m 24-years-old and engaged. Everything is, so far, so good. But there is one problem that is really irking me and I figured I’d see whether I’m overreacting or whether this is something worth fighting for.

I grew up in a home with a lot of children and very little money. From an early age, I did whatever I could to earn money. I started buying my own clothing for myself at a ridiculously young age. I also like nice things and figured out how to get it, since I knew that my parents couldn’t afford to buy these things for me or my siblings.

As I got older, I became very independent in this way. I was on my own financially. (I even paid for my dentist!) But it also motivated me to take school very seriously and do well. Right now, I have a wonderful job and earn a salary that I am very proud of. But I’ve never discussed money with my parents, since they never asked and probably knew that since they had nothing to contribute, it probably wasn’t really any of their business. My chosson grew up in a very different type of household. His parents paid for everything, including his education. And so, there was an open dialogue about money and when he landed his first job last year, he was excited to tell his parents what he was earning. When we marry shortly, we will be totally independent, financially. No one will be helping us and we don’t need any help, thank G-d. However, my mother-in-law wants to know how much I earn, how much our rent will be, etc. I find her questions inappropriate and rude. I don’t feel I need to share this private information with her, especially since they aren’t contributing to our finances. It’s causing some friction between me and my chosson. What do you think? Must they know my private financial details?

Disclaimer: This column is not intended to diagnose or otherwise conclude resolutions to any questions. Our intention is not to offer any definitive conclusions to any particular question, rather offer areas of exploration for the author and reader. Due to the nature of the column receiving only a short snapshot of an issue, without the benefit of an actual discussion, the panel’s role is to offer a range of possibilities. We hope to open up meaningful dialogue and individual exploration.

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The Panel

The Rebbetzin Rebbetzin Faigie Horowitz, M.S.

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ood for you for recognizing that you and your chosson have different relationships with money, both personally and culturally from your respective families. It affects not only the way you are relating to your mother-in-law now but will affect your relationship with your future husband. You are sensitive about being quizzed about money and see this as an invasion of privacy on the part of your mother-in-law. You think it’s not justified and not appropriate. Yes, she may be caring, open and practical as you indicated. On the other hand, you are proud of your independence and developing the ability to support yourself while you are single. But you have not discussed money with your own parents and that’s not healthy and open, even if it comes from a place of sensitivity and practicality. Your different relationships with money are going to affect your relationship even if you two will be self-supporting and financially independent. You are probably a saver and have long term goals in mind. He may want to take vacations and enjoy life along the way and not always save, save, save. Understanding these differences is one step but navigating through them in a healthy way is going to be a process. Give yourselves tools for your marriage. Learn the skills involved in talking about money and other loaded emotional topics. Enroll in the Shalom Workshop offered by the Shalom Task Force, wherein you will learn to access communication techniques and methods for hearing each other and working things out without a lot of pain. Money is one of the topics addressed in this helpful course which covers many healthy marriage tools.

This is about a lot more than responding to your chosson’s mother’s questions about finances. You two have to learn to respond to each other with caring, sensitivity and honesty. This will take time and skills. Get started now with this tried and true evidence-based training. It’s a worthwhile investment of time and effort.

The Mother Sarah Schwartz Schreiber, P.A.

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efore I answer, I want to congratulate you on being so independent and responsible; your chosson is indeed a lucky guy for landing such an amazing kallah. One of my steadfast beliefs is there are two socially unacceptable questions: What is your weight? What is your salary? On a serious note, during this engagement period, it’s time you had a heart-to-heart with your chosson regarding privacy, in-laws and finances. Make your (rightful) sensitivity about money matters clear: don’t ask, don’t tell… yes, even to your in-laws. If your mother-in-law persists in prying, answer her with a disingenuously stated question, “Now, why would you want to know such personal information?”

The Shadchan Michelle Mond

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ou’re right that you mother-inlaw does not need to know how much you earn or how much your rent will be. However, it could be that she is asking so she can make sure you two will get off on the right foot and will have enough money. Since they have always helped him

out in the past, it seems that the logical explanation is that she just wants to make sure you two won’t need help moving forward. This is actually a very nice and thoughtful gesture! If you are sure this is clearly not the case and she is just asking to be nosy, then it is a bit inappropriate. Sometimes people say things out of line and we must learn to take it in stride and communicate our frustrations in an effective way. I would say the following to keep things in perspective. If this is just a small, isolated annoyance and everything else is fine, I think you are in good shape. Everybody has runins with their in-laws at some point. You can try to have an open discussion with your chosson about the boundaries you will set starting now, in becoming your own independent couple, which includes not sharing personal information that just pertain to the two of you. Do not do it in a way where he will feel defensive about his family. Make sure to clarify how much you love and appreciate them. Realize, however, that he has lived 20-plus years in his parents’ household. If he has an excitement to tell his mother how much his new job makes, it is only natural and not a bad thing that he has a closeness, which makes him excited to share. Also, I would encourage you to alter your mindset a bit. Rather than looking at your chosson’s parents past financial help as a detriment, look at it as an advantage. They paid for his education so you are not inheriting tons of debt and are able to start out fresh. Every couple will have differences which come from differences in how they were raised. The trick is not to get bothered by everything and learn to pick your battles. Having an “ayin tovah,” focusing on the overall good, during your engagement period and during marriage will definitely take you further than picking on every small detail that bothers you. You

Make your (rightful) sensitivity about money matters clear: don’t ask, don’t tell…yes, even to your in-laws.

will be a much happier person in the long run!

The Single Tova Wein

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irst off, I must say kudos to you for checking in with the panel about your concerns over your overly inquisitive future mother-in-law. Engagements are such a stressful time and sometimes it seems like everything is a big deal – and it’s easy to wonder what really is a big deal and what isn’t. I happen to agree with you that your future mother-in-law is out of line. It could be coming from a naïve place of not understanding anything about you and your background and your hard earned sense of independence. Or it could be coming from a nosy place of being way too curious. So first off, I think it’s important to discuss your feelings around this subject with your chosson and explain your discomfort in having to report to anyone, other than him, details regarding how much you earn. Your chosson may be totally clueless toward what it feels like to be self-reliant and therefore private


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about one’s financial secrets. Hopefully, if the two of you are communicating well, he’ll be able to hear you and support your feelings. And by supporting your feelings, I mean telling his parents that they will not be learning of your salary now or ever. The two of you may have to finetune some specifics. For instance, are you OK with him telling his

parents what he earns? And, if so, does he have to report to them every time he gets a raise? And by them knowing what he earns, do his parents feel they have any say is how you spend your money? (Are you sure you can afford a vacation right now?) I also think it’s significant that the two of you plan on being totally financially independent. That’s

called acting like adults, and your in-laws should treat you like adults and trust that you are both capable of making good financial decisions for yourselves. If they feel like giving you gifts now and then, wonderful! But that doesn’t mean that you are beholden to them with your personal financial information. Yes, this is one of those areas worth taking a stand on!

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Couples benefit from learning how to effectively communicate.

Pulling It All Together The Navidaters Dating and Relationship Coaches and Therapists

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heard a wonderful response/comeback recently. “If you forgive me for not answering, I’ll forgive you for asking.” While I advise against retorting to your mother-in-law and chosson with this response due to its snarky nature, I do want to convey how much I think you are in the right! Not only do you and your husband-to-be earn your own money, you have also earned the right to keep your finances private. You and your chosson are doing it right and you should be very proud! In certain circles, couples marry at a very young age and the possibility of financial independence is quite grim. Couples getting married while they are still pursuing their education cannot possibly support themselves. It seems to be the norm that parents are financially supporting their children. I’m not placing a personal value or judgment on this practice; I’m simply reporting the reality. As a result of men and women marrying before they can possibly be financially independent, it has placed parents in the position of being involved financially, both from

a practical investment (handing over money) and from an emotional investment (questions and concerns). Being that this seems to be a universal practice in some circles, I am going to give your mother-in-law and chosson the benefit of the doubt. In your e-mail, you didn’t mention whether or not she has married off other children and whether or not those children are financially dependent on her. Perhaps she has friends with married children and understands her involvement as common practice. Whatever the case may be, whether she is rude and inappropriate or simply a product of her environment, in your situation, her involvement is unnecessary. I am hopeful that the friction you are experiencing with your chosson can be chalked up to your very different backgrounds and upbringing. As long as there is open communication and mutual respect, this can hopefully be worked out. You are asking for a boundary to be placed around you, your fiancé and your finances. Your chosson does not want the boundary.

It is open territory. These matters, when unable to be resolved organically within the couple, ought to be brought to a qualified therapist’s office for some premarital counseling. Get a good referral and seek guidance – now. Couples benefit from learning how to effectively communicate. Part of “effective communication” is learning how to listen to each other’s feelings about issues. Perhaps there is a compromise that can be reached; perhaps this situation warrants no compromise. This issue needs to be squared away before you get married. Approach your chosson again about this issue. This time, make it a collaboration: We seem to be hitting a wall when we talk about your mom’s involvement in our finances. Can you help me understand your perspective and what you want? You are warm, open and simply gathering information. No fighting. You will now have an opportunity to share your feelings. After you do, you can ask, So, how do you see us resolving this issue? Depending on his answer and whatever comes of this collaborative conver-

sation, you will know whether or not you need premarital counseling. If you do, you can say, I see we are both feeling uncomfortable regarding your mother’s role in our finances. I think we should talk to someone so we can come to some resolution. Couples have disagreements and bumps in the road – fairly typical and to be expected. Your job now is to make sure you feel comfortable moving forward. Sincerely, Jennifer Mann Esther Mann, LCSW and Jennifer Mann, LCSW are licensed psychotherapists and dating and relationship coaches working with individuals, couples and families in private practice in Hewlett, NY. To set up a consultation or to ask questions, please call 516.224.7779. Press 1 for Esther, 2 for Jennifer. Visit www.thenavidaters.com for more information. If you would like to submit a dating or relationship question to the panel anonymously, please email thenavidaters@gmail.com. You can follow The Navidaters on FB and Instagram for dating and relationship advice.


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Madraigos

The Story of a Parent’s Role Navigating the Maze By Rivki Rosenwald, Esq. MFT

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very parent deserves a medal. This is not a simple job. Parents are motivated from a place of deep love and concern and want the best for their children. The effort often yields rewarding results. However, it certainly presents trying tests along the way. Many parents worry that their child needs to be something they envision and feel personal failure when their child is not on that specific trajectory. Parents are certainly meant to love and guide their children. However, a child often has different strengths and talents than the ones we thought they would have. Getting comfortable with this reality can be difficult. Helping them build on their qualities, and supporting their needs during this journey, is an important part of our job as parents. In the Torah, we meet Moshe. When Moshe is born his parents are not identified. “A man went from a house of Levi and took a daughter of Levi. The woman conceived and gave birth to a son” (Exodus 2:1-2). The Sages point out that only later are we told who these parents are. They ex-

plain that a child is not an extension of a pair. They are recognized as parents when they help a child actualize his potential. Rabbi Nechemia Coopersmith, of Aish Hatorah, tells of his and his wife’s concern when hearing their third child would be born with a specific impediment. They felt that the dreams they had for their son would not be achieved. They struggled with this knowledge. After spending some time raising this child, he confided that he learned from this child more than he could have ever taught him. He learned that the job of a parent is to help a child develop his own strengths and gifts and that other important qualities could emerge differently from those envisioned. He said that this ultimately helped him be a more attuned and effective parent to all of his children. “As parents, you need to fully recognize and reconsider your role as it relates to your child’s struggles, says Michael Riera, PhD. When our children are born, we often begin dreaming of what they can be. We think our child will be

just like us, and sometimes we think our child will be a far better version than us. And yes, they may in fact turn out to have similarities, or even be much more than we ever envisioned. Alternatively, they may turn out to be completely different than we had conceived. Nevertheless, that may be their purpose and destiny. Encouraging their strong points can help them emerge with greater confidence. However, the path they take to get to adulthood may be rocky or quite different than we envisioned. It can be especially trying since they pass through the years of adolescence to get there. The teen years begin a challenging time for most parents. Children who have used their brains in one pattern suddenly seem to be getting their wires crossed. Teenagers’ attitudes change, their judgement seems less sturdy, and their willingness to accept guidance from their parents seem much less intact. Therefore, parents often feel unsure that this person is the result of the child they have been raising. All of this is happening while a child is searching for

their adult identity. “As the craftsman trains for years, before gaining full status in his field, the adolescent is learning to handle adult responsibilities. The perimeter of your adolescent’s mind is expanding, allowing him to think in new ways. He is struggling with the crucial task of forming an identity,” is noted by the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry in “Your Adolescent.” It is important for a parent to really understand that there is a lot going on for their child during these years. They change physically, hormonally, mentally and socially. (Uncommon Sense for Parents with Teenagers, Michael Riera PhD). Starting at around age 12, their emotional brain is in aggressive development, making them more volatile and impulsive. If a child doesn’t have his own brain giving him good advice on how to deal with strong emotions, then watching a parent be explosive, rather than calm and thought out, reinforces this unguided behavior. This creates an opportunity for parents to model self-control when emotions


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kick in, rather than being irrational as well. To get there, a parent must be attuned to what’s going on inside of himself. Brad Reedy has produced over 900 webinars on understanding parent-child dynamics. In his book, The Journey of The Heroic Parent, he states, “Influential parenting is established through self-awareness.” What is going on inside of us as our child transforms? Are we reacting to our own fears? Are we upset they are not becoming what we want them to be? Are we stuck in our own agenda and not looking at their feelings, needs, fears and struggles during this inevitable growth process? That is the “self-awareness” parents need to develop. If parents can separate what they are feeling or experiencing, and work to harness their reactive posture, then they can be available to understand their child better. If a parent can recognize how he is responding to the words or behaviors and how it’s upsetting him,

then he can be more available to cope in a calm manner. This is certainly not a simple task for a parent. Parents are used to helping organize their children’s lives. It is new to question: am I reacting to my fear for them, rather than their underlying need or feeling? As the natural teen inclination develops toward independence and adulthood, albeit many times in a childish pattern of assertions, rebellions and disrespect, parents can get very unsettled. It helps to recognize that this is unfamiliar territory for the child as well. The teen has new emotions, along with unfamiliar reactions and instincts. Children’s behaviors are often sparked by these changes and uncertainties. Psychologist Erik Erikson highlights the importance of this teen process by saying that an adolescent not engaging in the process often gets stuck with unrealized independence and a confused identity. As parents, we are then left with a child instead of

someone who has transitioned into adulthood. A parent can assist in this transition by reacting more rationally. One method is for a parent to tune into, and empathize with, the underlying need or feeling that sparked the behavior. An unacceptable or disturbing behavior stems from a feeling or a need. When parents try to understand the underlying emotion of a teen, it helps both parties forge a greater connection while dealing with the challenges of adolescence. Brad Reedy encourages, “As parents we need to allow our children to actually feel their emotions, to deeply experience their experiences and be there for them in intimate ways as they struggle.” Exploring this approach can help guide parents in supporting an adolescent in a journey from childhood to adulthood with greater harmony and respect for the process. Madraigos will be presenting a parenting evening on Monday, Octo-

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ber 30, at 8 p.m. in The Beth Shalom Ballroom. Rabbi Zachariah Wallerstein will be speaking about conscious parenting. Dr. Brad Reedy will be speaking about “How do I get my kids to...without them hating me.” At the event, Madraigos will be awarding the pioneering leaders of the first three educational and supportive parenting groups for parents of teens and young adults. These successful parenting groups met at Madraigos headquarters, 936 Broadway, over the past year. Men and women are invited to attend. Admission is free. To reserve seats or for more information about the event, please contact Eli Perlman at eperlman@ madraigos.org or 516.371.3250 extension 111.

Rivki Rosenwald is a certified relationship counselor, and career and life coach. She can be contacted at 917-705-2004 or rivki@rosenwalds.com


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Notable Quotes “Say What?!”

It is time for players in the NFL to stop protests during the anthem and move on from what has become a divisive political sideshow. Instead, I encourage them to use their voices and influence to take a stand against domestic violence. - Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker in a letter to Roger Goodell, trolling the NFL which has a rather large domestic violence issue

Wow, what a moving evening this is. I’m sitting here listening, watching, absorbing, thinking about Ali even though I never met him. And with this kind of inspiration, I will go and take out Trump tonight.

President Bush embarrassed himself…. It’s clear he didn’t know that he didn’t understand anything he was talking about. He equates the industrial revolution, agriculture revolution, globalization. He has no earthly idea whether he’s coming or going, just like it was when he was President of the United States. - Steve Bannon responding to George W. Bush’s speech in which he took veiled shots at President Trump

- Rep Maxine Waters (D-CA) at the Ali Forney Center gala in New York City

There’s talk of including video gamers in future Olympics. Olympic gamers would be treated like all other athletes, except they’d be tested for “performance-enhancing ramen. - Conan O’Brien

Breaking news out of Brooklyn: a cow was on the loose… This cow was actually a baby bull; it escaped from a slaughterhouse – the only slaughterhouse in Brooklyn that hasn’t been converted into an art gallery/event space. – Jimmy Kimmel

We’re going into an era where people want someone who comes up with solutions. I think we’re going into a time where you need somebody who can connect to people and relate to people at a base level and appreciate what they’re going through — and I think I qualify on each of those. - Mark Cuban, on Fox News

“[I’ll] probably [run as a] Republican… Because I think there’s a place for somebody who’s socially a centrist but I’m very fiscally conservative. - Ibid.

MORE QUOTES


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I have to give them credit. Trump and his allies, including Fox News, are really experts at distraction and diversion. So the closer the investigation about real Russian ties between Trump associates and real Russians, as we heard [Attorney General] Jeff Sessions finally admit to in his testimony the other day, the more they want to just throw mud on the wall. - Hillary Clinton on C-Span responding to a new bombshell report by The Hill that in 2010 the FBI became aware that Russian nuclear industry officials gave large donations to the Clinton Global Initiative in an effort to sway the U.S. to approve a uranium deal with Russia

Quips From the Famous

A quiet and modest life brings more joy than a pursuit of success bound with constant unrest. - Complete contents of a note by Albert Einstein to a messenger in Japan, recently revealed and now up for auction

This man is a sick man. He’s coldhearted, and he feels no pity or sympathy for anyone. - Rep. Frederica Wilson (D-Fla.) on CNN, talking about a phone call between President Trump and a Gold Star widow which she eavesdropped on and in which she claims President Trump was flippant and said “that’s what he signed up for” about the dead soldier

It stuns me that a member of Congress would have listened in on that conversation. Absolutely stuns me. And I thought at least that was sacred. You know, when I was a kid growing up, a lot of things were sacred in our country. Women were sacred, looked upon with great honor. That’s obviously not the case anymore as we see from recent cases. Life – the dignity of life – is sacred. That’s gone. Religion, that seems to be gone as well. Gold Star families, I think that left in the convention over the summer. But I just thought, the selfless devotion that brings a man or woman to die on the battlefield, I just thought that that might be sacred. And when I listened to this woman and what she was saying, and what she was doing on TV, the only thing I could do to collect my thoughts was to go and walk among the finest men and women on this Earth. And you can always find them because they’re in Arlington National Cemetery. - White House Chief of Staff John Kelly in a press conference after Rep. Frederica Wilson (D-Fla.) listened into President Trump’s phone call to a Gold Star widow and then claimed that President Trump was insensitive during the call

You mean to tell me that I have become so important that the White House is following me and my words? This is amazing. That’s amazing. That is absolutely phenomenal. I’ll have to tell my kids that I’m a rock star now. - Rep. Wilson in an interview with WSVN-TV in Miami

As we say in the South, “all hat, no cattle.” - White House press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders categorizing Democratic Rep. Frederica Wilson (D-Fla.)

MORE QUOTES


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