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TroyLambrecht

scrawls


Foreword Hi there, dear reader of this book! Yeah, you who is reading this now. First of all, I would like to thank you. Just because you’re spending your time on reading this, and hopefully on reading the poems that will follow after this piece of boring talk. If you’re not really interested in this, you can skip this off course and turn two pages, where I kick this book of with “I’ll share my road”. If you’re about to turn those pages there is still one thing that I would really like to say to you: enjoy! Now, if you’re reading this. Thank you. Thanks for sticking with me. It does actually mean a lot to me that you take your time to read this book. Writing is open up your heart a bit for exposure. Especially when you publish your writings on the internet or in a real book. When I first wrote something and let somebody read that piece, I was biting my nails of because I was really scared. Not because of what the person would think about the poem itself, but because of what I had written. Well, this time, I’m dead scared! I didn’t open my heart for a tiny bit. I’ve opened a whole door this time. And I would like to invite you to come inside and make it yourself cosy and enjoy the time as it passes by. The poems I’ve written are about different subjects. There is a lot of love, but in different kind of ways. Love as there is in friendship, there is really romantic love I’ve written about. Also, there are some poems about being lost. About being lost in yourself, being lost in this big world, about losing someone. But I shouldn’t say what the poem’s subject is. If you’re reading this you’re going to have some favourites, there are some you’re going to hate. And that’s okay. I would be delighted if you can find yourself a meaning for each poem. I believe that each text can mean something different to everybody. But I have said enough by now. I should let you read this book. Have a nice trip in, as I like to call it, in my world…

Troy October 2010


The Scrawls 1. I’ll Share My Road With You 2. Dancing in the Rain 3. Who You Were (When You Left) 4. How Do You Say 5. Fake Smile 6. Be There For Me 7. I Don’t Understand 8. When I Close My Eyes 9. Do You Feel The Same? 10. Lost 11. True Love 12. A Happy Moment 13. If Life Was A Movie 14. Love At First Sight 15. Where Are You Now? 16. Under The Same Sky 17. Here I Stand 18. (That’s Not) The Way I See Me 19. Now I Cry Myself To Sleep 20. Road of Happiness 21. Light Up The City 22. I Promise 23. In Love With You 24. Are You Doing That Too? 25. I Wish You Were Here 26. Help Me To Carry The Fire 27. Tonight Between The Stars 28. Beautiful Girl 29. Make Me Smile Again 30. My Way | I’ll Share My Road With You (Reprise)


I’ll Share My Road With You If you can't remember for a quite long time which way you should follow; If you are in doubt for some time now if you should go left or right; If you are passing the same point for the umpteenth time and you think "I've been here before"; If you’re looking on the map and you can't find the place you are; Or when your way has a dead end. Take my hand I'll share my road with you I'll take care, and try to heal you soon When you feel so hopeless insecure; when you feel no feelings anymore;

Take my hand I'll share my road with you I'll take care, and try to heal you soon. When you have given up all your hope when there is no faith anymore and when you think you can't live life on your own Take my hand I'll share my road with you I'll take care, and try to heal you soon

when your demons have taken over your dreams and when you think you can't walk your path no longer alone;

~9~


Dancing in the Rain Grey clouds Green grass No sun Only me Outside Raindrops start falling strolling down my face. Each raindrop is a tear I've never cried. But suddenly I start dancing in the rain. I won't let the dark thoughts haunt me longer. I'm dancing in the rain Getting wet I'm dancing in the rain enjoying it I'm dancing in the rain

I'm dancing in the rain Getting wet I'm dancing in the rain I enjoy it I'm dancing in the rain Happy again I'm dancing in the rain No longer thinking I'm dancing in the rain I'm smiling I'm dancing in the rain The sun is shining

Happy again I've been down too long After a while there weren't enough tears to let me cry So inside I almost died But now...

~11~


Who You Were (When You Left) You're not the same person anymore I don't know where you are I don't even know who you are right now You're not the same person anymore who you were, when you left But if it could happen I would be happy to meet you again Say Hello-Who are you-nice to meet you... again I wonder if I would recognise you when I saw you walking down the street because

who you were, when you left When you would pass by I probably would look at you think -Whoahand stare with nothing to say I wouldn't even know it was you I saw because You're not the same person anymore who you were, when you left Tell me where you are right now because I want to meet you again and pretend nothing ever happened since you've left

~13~


How Do You Say Hey girl, I want to ask you a question if I may but I don't really know how to say My heart was broken too many times to exposure it too everybody just like this again. If I could I would take your hand and just show you how many pictures I have in my head Hey girl, I know I'm talking nonsense to you like this but I really don't know how to say I don't know in which way I should say that my heart has fallen in love with you

~15~


Fake Smile They ask you how you are you say you’re fine but you're pretending You put up that fake smile everyday again so that nobody would see that in fact you're just broken on the inside They ripped your heart out didn't care about how you would feel And still nobody sees that you are broken beaten, lost and scared You're looking for a home, any direction for a place between two warm arms You still believe that one day you'll find that place But for now you'll keep pretending everything is okay and put up your fake smile again

~17~


Be There For Me The thoughts in my head are doing I don't want to feel

crazy things with me

left and alone.

when you aren't

If you see the

there

fear in my face

to get them out

come over here

of my mind.

and just be there for me.

I don't want to feel

I need somebody

left and alone.

around me

If you see the

And tomorrow everything starts again And everything

I'm going mad

fear in my face

will be the same

after being

come over here

again

on my own

and be there

for so long

for me.

I don't want to

At night

those fears

when the world

on my face,

feel left and alone.

has stopped

If you see the

living for hours

fear in my face

and when I am

come over here

going to bed

and just be there

I cry myself

for me

So please, when you see

why don't you just be there for me?

to sleep, there is nobody to be there for me ~19~


I Don’t Understand Mama, can you explain me the things I don't understand Why is it that people are making war about which God is best if they don't know does one of them really exist? Mama, can you explain me the things I don't understand Why is it that when parents are divorced one always tell the kids

Why is it that people hurt each other to become the first in the queue why is it that they just don't wait? Mama, can you explain me the things I don't understand

that he or she is the best? Mama, can you explain me the things I don't understand

~21~


When I Close My Eyes I put my belongings into my bag I'm gonna leave this place I'm getting depressive over here. I wanna feel some happiness love or just some sun in my heart. When I close my eyes I see pictures of you and me happy together and in love And I miss you I can't live my life without you I tried but it didn't work every time, everything ended by you When I close my eyes I see pictures of you and me happy together and in love And then she came and smiled at me

for more then a second I wasn't thinking about you When I close my eyes I just see her smile, fantasies of her and me, happy together and in love When I close my eyes I see pictures of her smiling When I close my eyes I see pictures of her and me happy together and in love When I close my eyes I see memories of you and me and I know you will be always there

In my mind‌

~23~


Do You Feel The Same When I do things, that make me think about you. When I feel something, that reminds me of you. I start wondering, do you ever feel the same, or are you completely over me? Have you ever felt the same, like I felt about you? I gave you my heart, you broke it. I said things I really meant, but all you did was laugh when you heard them. I'm wondering, do you ever feel the same, or are you completely over me? Have you ever felt the same, like I felt about you? Sometimes I really don't know

But I know their will be always that tiny part of my heart that is reserved for you, and whatever that comes along you stay in that place forever But I still wonder do you ever feel the same, or are you completely over me? Have you ever felt the same, like I felt about you Do you ever feel the same, or are you completely over me? Have you ever felt the same, like I felt about you?

did you really mean it was forever when you said it was. Sometimes I don't know did you ever truly loved me with whole your heart.

~25~


Lost I don't know which direction I should take Now you're gone

and I think

you left me

I'm a little bit

on my own

lost

I don't know which direction I should take and I think I'm a little bit lost in the world I don't understand when you're not with me You pushed me away, said get out of my life and leave but I'll always be closer then you think I'll be

in the world I don't understand when you're not with me I'll never give up on you and I'll keep the promises that I’ve once made I don't know which direction I should take and I think I'm a little bit lost in the world I don't understand when you're not with me

~27~


True Love Now we've found the love we always have been looking for, now that our souls are finally bound Heart took over the brain, hands strangled and we wake up tangled in the sheets it's true love when I said that you smelled like strawberries you answered "It's chocolate that I smell" Heart took over the brain, hands strangled and we wake up tangled in the sheets it's true love When I was drowning in your eyes you took me in your arms and pushed me to your chest close to the heart I fell in love with Heart took over the brain, hands strangled and we wake up tangled in the sheets it's true love ~29~


A Happy Moment Early mornin' sitting in the local cafĂŠ having a hot cup of coffee it's winter leaves on the ground it's raining people wearing warm coats I'm dreaming staring outside sitting alone on my table finally happy again I love this moment time could stop ticking and I would be here happy forever dreaming through the window

~31~


If Life Was a Movie Why is a movie always better than life turns to be? Why is it that a man with untreatable cancer can survive his dead? Why do all the losers end up with those beautiful girls? Why is it that the good always win from the bad? If life was just a movie I would be rich and famous, happy as a guy can be and have the most cutest and beautiful girlfriend you've ever seen.

Why is it that that every couple get back together after the whole story? If life was just a movie I would be rich and famous, happy as a guy can be and have the most cutest and beautiful girlfriend you've ever seen. It turns out that life isn't a movie. No, life is just the cruellest bitch you've ever met

But I'm not an actor in the movie of my life I'm just a clown messing around. Why does every film have a happy end? ~33~


Love at first sight You look at me, I look at you. You smile to me and I answer by blowing a kiss to you Is this love at first sight like they say or is this just some playing around? You came to me and I said "Hi, you look so good" but you were

You put a note in my pocket "it's my number don't lose it baby" was what you said Is this love at first sight like they say or is this just some playing around? You kissed my cheek and waved goodbye I said

already

I won't

blushing

but you

Is this love at first sight like they say or is this just some playing

were already gone Was this love at first sight or was it just some playing around?

around? ~35~


Where Are You Now? Why don't we talk no more? Why don't we got out for a walk no more? Why don't we even call no more? We used to share dreams we used to share our plans we even used to share the same ideas Where you were, I was there Were I was, there were you But now I'm here alone and I don't know, but tell me where are you? Why don't we talk no more? Why don't we got out for a walk no more?

Why don't we talk no more? Why don't we got out for a walk no more? Why don't we even call no more? We used to laugh about the same thing we used to talk about great events which only took place in the dreams that we shared but tell me...

Why don't we even call no more? Isn't it funny how everything can change while everything stays the same

Why don't we talk

I don't really know

no more?

what happened

Why don't we got out for a walk

And in a matter of fact

no more?

I don't really need to know

Why don't we even call no more?

~37~


Under The Same Sky I am here and you are there but together we are under the same sky If I look up to the clouds and you do exactly the same on the other side of the world maybe we're looking to the same cloud I am here and you are there but together we are under the same sky At night we both could lie down watching the stars as the time passes by It would look like we were lying down alone but in our hearts we both would know that I am here and you are there but together we are under the same sky

~39~


Here I Stand Here I stand, Here I stand

look at me

and look what

I could do a

I’ve achieved!

happy dance

I'm here

I could do

on the place

everything

you've always been dreaming of Here I stand, the place that always seemed to be unreachable.

I want

Here I stand

because

I came from

I did it without

I don't care

anybody's help

if you stare

Here I stand

Everyone said

nobody has to

I would never make it.

say what I can

Well look y'all! Here I stand!

or can't Here I stand

I'm happy

with some bumps

I'm strong

and bruises

and there are

which only made

smarter men

me stronger

that never came so far as where I am. Here I stand you didn't believe well, rub your eyes well and see where I am!

far with nothing

at me I know you won't believe but it's me! So look good rub your eyes yes, you see well it's me who stands here.

Here I stand you don't have to be afraid I won't pay with revenge I'll give you an overdose of sweet love. ~41~


(That’s Not) The Way I See Me But I won't I'm a wounded man

let people see

I've got many scars

what's going

from the past,

on inside me

but probably there are more to come

Nobody has to see the way I see me

But I won't

Nobody sees me

let people see

the way I see me

what's going

They think I feel better

on inside me

than they feel.

Nobody has to

They think

see the way

I'm always

I see me I'm scared of nothing only feared of nightmares

smiling, but they don't feel me. They think I feel fine

that might

but that's not

come true

the way I see me

~43~


Now I Cry Myself Asleep Look at this You've always said that you'd always be there for me but where are you know

fucked up world it's hard to survive on your own don't you think? Everybody's asking

And now I cry myself asleep at night

when I cry myself

"how are you doing sir?"

well now

asleep?

but nobody really cares

where are you dear?

about what the answer

I just need you

Everything went downhill from the moment

will be. And now

that you were gone

I cry myself asleep

I'm completely lost

at night

in this mad world without you. And now I cry myself asleep at night

well now where are you, dear?

by my side Tonight I'll be on your side I promise I'll be there when your demons

I just need you

keep you awake

by my side

I'll be there when

You should see

well now

how my demons

where are you girl?

eat from my brain

I just need you

they keep me awake

by my side

at night and are feed

no one gives about you I'll always be there 'cause I'll never go

by the thoughts of the day

~45~


Road of Happiness I'm walking on the road of happiness it's full of those beautiful memories The road is full of fog but it's okay I can see the memories so clear And I'm walking on the road of happiness and it's full of beautiful memories I see things from the past that I've forgotten the memories from moments I was full of warm happiness

~47~


Light Up The City I'm sure with the warmth Winter's done, the summer's gone

of your love you could melt

and it has been

the pieces of my heart

freezing to long.

back together

I try to be cheerful,

And maybe

but my heart's still

you could

broken and when I try to smile my heart breaks a little bit more You could warm my soul, and together we could light up the whole city tonight. Imagine you and I together lighten up this whole place

make me smile You could warm my soul, and together we could light up the whole city tonight. We could be stars above the city, we could be shining, not only at night we could lighten up this city we could lighten up this city This city

try to see

would be

how awesome

lightened

it would look

by the energy of our love tonight. ~49~


I Promise And I promise I remember the day

I'll always be there

that you start talking to me.

when you need me

We've had a chat

And I promise

about nothing at all

I'll take care of you

But we both had a laugh

whenever you need it

and a new friend

I only stay as long as you want

And I promise

so it's up to you,

I'll always be there

you decide when the moment

when you need me

has come that I have to go

And I promise I'll take care of you when you need it the most I only stay as long as you want so it's up to you if we're friends forever The years have passed and nothing stays the same we’ve had our fights, we’ve had our words, we’ve had our laughs we’ve had our cries

I know we can make it to the future as long as we are strong we must care for each other But I promise I'll stay 'till the very last word has spoken When there is no longer anything to say I'll stay 'till you feel like you don't need me anymore

and still I'm right behind you

But remember

although we've both changed

you'll be my friend forever in my heart

~51~


In Love With You I'm thinking about the memories that we once have shared. I can still remember the one where you said "I love you" to me, while that shining smile was on your face Suddenly I melted and felt in more love to you. I can still remember the one where you were crying in my arms. I tried to dry your tears and kissed your cheek. Suddenly I melted and felt once more

Can you remember when I got from the train? You ran into my arms. In the middle of that platform, we kissed each other and didn't care about what the world would think Suddenly I melted and felt once more in love with you Now all those memories are gone but I'll keep them safe in the vault that's called my mind. And suddenly I realise I'm still in love with you

in love with you

~53~


Are You Doing That Too? I'm staring at the ceiling, thinking 'bout you and I'm wondering are you doing that too? You are far away from here and I'm about to die of missing you and I'm wondering are you doing that too? Each time when I kiss your lips by each hug I give to you and I'm wondering are you loving me too? and I wonder sometimes am I the only one who has these thoughts or are you having them too?

~55~


I Wish You Were Here The rain is ticking on my window and I don't know where you are but I wish you were here lying next to me. I would tell what I feel I could be your teddy bear Oh I wish you were here Together underneath the sheets our legs strangled in between my arms around you and our lips kissing for the words unspoken I would tell what I feel I could be your teddy bear Oh I wish you were here In my arms you could sleep you could even count the sheep together we would be here Oh my lord I wish you were here

~57~


Help Me To Carry The Fire Will you help me to carry the fire when I won't be able to carry it no longer Will you help me to carry the fire when I need it the most? You're my best friend and I believe, even when you're miles away you are still close to me Will you help me to carry the fire when I can't hold it any longer will you help me to carry the fire when I am in need Don't ever leave me please I need you to stay on my side whatever that will happen I need you help me to carry the fire to keep our fire burning to keep the fire inside us in dark nights when we need it the most

~59~


Tonight Between The Stars Tonight we could get lost between the stars Tonight the sky could be our playground Between the stars is enough place for the two of us Between the stars there will be enough light to see your beautiful smile Tonight we could get lost between the stars Tonight the sky could be our playground The people who stay behind will see us putting the stars together The whole earth will ask us "is it really that beautiful like it seems" I'll not be able to answer that question honestly I guess because between all those stars the only thing I'll be able to see is you Tonight we could meet between the stars Tonight the sky could be our home ~61~


Beautiful Girl We had never really met

And there you were

before

talking to me,

though we've had some

in your lovely pink dress,

chats on the internet.

with that pretty smile on

It was really strange when you called my name for that whole place. So I looked back, not sure of who I had missed. And there you were waving to me, in your lovely pink dress, with that pretty smile on your face and those two shiny stars in your eyes. You're a beautiful girl. We both hadn't the time

And there you were in my dream, in your lovely pink dress, with that pretty smile on your

your face and those two shiny stars in your eyes. You're a beautiful girl.

face

I must confess

and those two shiny

I hadn't thought

stars in your eyes. You're a beautiful girl. Time past by and we did talk some more

you would be my girl one day And here you are hugging me

but never really met.

in your lovely pink dress,

'till that day we met

with that pretty smile on

again

your

you were working on

face

the

and those two shiny

to stand and talk but

play I went to.

stars looking at me

afterwards we had a

And when I stared in

lovely telephone conversation, telling our deepest secrets and our darkest thoughts to each other

your eyes my heart skipped a

You're the most beautiful girl I've ever seen

beat.

you're mine beautiful girl ~63~


Make Me Smile Again

When you can't see the stars 'cause of the clouds, when colourful balloons became black and white, When the world's gone grey, when the raindrops

when the cats no longer play with the dogs

replaced the tears,

Throw your arms

and when there

around my waist,

are no longer

and tell me that

birds singing

everything

in the trees Take me in your arms, hold me tight And make me feel all right.

will be okay again. Hold your arms around me 'till the balloons have colored up

Just hug me

again,

'till that smile

'till the birds in

turns on my face again.

the trees sing a beautiful song Hold you arms around me 'till I smile again

~65~


My Way If you can’t remember for a quite long time which way you should follow; If you are in doubt for some time now if you have to go right or left; If you are passing the same point for the umpteenth time where you think “I’ve been here before”; If you are looking on the map again and you can’t find the place you are; Or when the way you are on has a dead end

Take my hand I’ll share my road with you and I’ll look after you, I promise you can stay as long as you want even if that means like forever

~67~


Pictures Dancing in the rain: Alyssa L. Miller How do you say: Daniel Horacio Agostini I Don't Understand: Jenson Lee Do You Feel The Same: Blythe D. Lost: Miss Sydney Marie If Life Was a Movie: Helga Webber Are You Doing That Too?: Ashley Rose Wish You Were Here: Ali Anne Help Me To Carry The Fire & Tonight Between The Stars Troy Lambrecht

If you’re picture is in this work and you don’t want this, please take contact. We’ve tried to reach as much we’ve could to contact to right owners of the pictures used in this work.


Love the one you’re with, love the place you’re at


This book is dedicated to The ones that made me smile in the past year, the ones that were always there for me. The ones I love. Inga, Irene, Jolien and Sam. Thank you so so much for everything. This one is for you! Cheers!

Official website www.troylambrecht.tk

Text copyright © Troy Lambrecht 2010 If you’re picture is in this work and you don’t want this, please take contact. We’ve tried to reach as much we’ve could to contact to right owners of the pictures used in this work.

None of these works can be copied without given permission.


A Teenage Dream Book Š 2010


Troy Lambrecht - Scrawls