Issue 130 | june 15, 2018 | 2 Taamuz, 5778
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Contents Issue 130 June 15, 2018
JUNE 15, 2018
MY NEIGHBOR JUDY
NOT SO HIDDEN COSTS
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55 BTWN 13 & 14
hey call it the peanut effect, when despite our best intentions or well-thought-out budget, we find ourselves spending the unplanned $10 on the car service, an extra $20 on an upgrade, or $15 on a quick lunch with friends. Perhaps these extracurriculars are not even that much, but these paltry sums, merely a pittance (which, incidentally, is defined as “like a single peanut out of an entire bag”), soon amount to a whole lot. Of course, the “little” or “lot” is relative to the individual and his financial means, but the premise holds true for all people and in every area in life: if we aren’t careful about the little things, they can easily and quickly snowball into something big. And similarly, if we aren’t careful with the few, they can soon accumulate into a whole lot. In Not-So-Hidden Costs, Raizy Zinreich successfully argues that camp becomes exorbitantly expensive, not so much for the initial cost – but for all the “little” purchases that kids insist are necessities. That’s what we notice when the credit card bill arrives at the end of the month. Small purchases sure tend to add up. (As do those interest fees!) It has also become evident in the way that packages have started shrinking in size while their price remains the same (or increases). My friend was just pointing out how the pound up or down on her bag of sugar didn’t initially bother her, but it soon became evident that it isn’t a standalone occurrence. Of course not. There is a reason that companies employ this money-making technique. Just a few cents on each sale, perhaps, but the profits do accumulate. This idea applies to money as much as other aspects of life.
A few minutes wasted each day, add up to lost hours and days (and weeks) by the end of the year. In contrast, a few minutes of well-invested time, can reap benefits far beyond expectations. We tend to undervalue the part, because we fail to recognize that it composes the whole. The most impressive achievements can likely be broken into little nuggets of mediocre success, but when viewed as a complete picture, it is absolutely remarkable. Anything can be done in increments. Is that what Pirkei Avos is reminding us when it urges us to be as careful with a little mitzvah as a big one? Be it good or bad, material or ephemeral, anything of value ever attained likely began with small and seemingly meaningless “peanuts.” It is rather ironic that the economic study references the much loved, nutritious, and at times, even life-saving bean when attempting to portray a valueless commodity. It just reinforces the reality that we fail to recognize the bounty and value of the parts that make up the whole.
PUBLISHER: TACHLIS MANAGING EDITOR: Tziri Hershkovitz COPY EDITOR: Raizy Shlezinger CONTRIBUTING WRITERS: Varda Branfman, Surie Frenkel, Rebbetzin Malka Friedman, B. Gordon, Channie Greenberg, Rivka Gross, Shirley Hess, Draizy Israel, R. Jacobson, Dan L. Kaff, Yehudis Litvak, Amy Nathans, Chany Paskes, Dr. David Rosmarin, P. Samuels, Rabbi Ben Tzion Shafier, Rifka Schonfeld, Matty Steinberg, Yael Tusk GRAPHICS: Erma Whine CARTOON ART: Devora Younger ADVERTISING: Chanie Kraus To advertise: 718-704-0944, Ext.1 or firstname.lastname@example.org contact: T: 718.704.0944 F: 877.331.3738 THE TACHLIS is not responsible for the content or reliability of the articles, advertisements, or other material, nor the kashrus of products and services. Copyright © 2018 by TACHLIS No part of this publication may be reproduced without prior permission in writing from the publisher. JUNE 15, 2018
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Your Input Chany Paskes did it again! I really enjoyed her story The Anniversary Gift. Beyond the stellar and entertaining writing, I really appreciated the sensitivity and respect with which the subject matter was handled. Thank you, TACHLIS, for bringing us stories that not only entertain but also inspire. A loyal reader, Shifra Katz, Boro Park Thanks for the article on Forgotten Funds. Maybe I’ll find some lost money. Hey, you never know! Can you please provide me with the website or sites I can search? Thanks! H.F. TACHLIS responds: Hey, You Never Know (Issue #128) triggered great excitement and interest. This week we bring you more helpful tips for protecting your assets, as well as a list of another random year and location. I understand that your request is for online sites to peruse, but please note that we intentionally did not share websites. Unfortunately, too many sites share similar addresses and have even replicated outdated lists – but are in fact scams. We felt it was unsafe to suggest that it’s secure to compromise your personal and sensitive information, unless you know whom you are entrusting it with. Our advice is to contact the State Comptroller directly or reach out to a trusted finder. (Reputable finders won’t charge upfront and will only take a percentage of the retrieved funds.) Not only do skillful finders know where to look, but they likely know of additional sites and alternative tricks to finding lost listings. Our special thanks, again, to Funds Forgotten for continuing to share valuable information with our readers. 347-4527651. Fundsfortotten@gmail.com.
14 ounces coleslaw mix or shredded head of cabbage 2 Tbsp soy or tamari sauce 10 drops stevia / 2 tsp sugar (optional) 1/2 tsp red pepper flakes / cayenne (according to preference) 1/2 tsp sriracha 1/2 tsp minced garlic 1 tsp white/wine/apple cider vinegar WHAT YOU DO: Brown ground meat with salt and pepper and set aside. Sauté onion, garlic and slaw/cabbage in sesame/olive oil until cabbage reaches desired doneness. Stir in soy/tamari sauce, vinegar, sweetener (if using) garlic, ginger and pepper flakes. Add Sriracha and mix well. Add browned ground beef/chicken/ turkey and mix thoroughly while heating.
TACHLIS regrets that this “eggroll in a bowl,” our CRACK SLAW recipe (Issue #128), didn’t get the proper attention when featured with the wrong image. We listen to our readers, and we agree that it was a pity, especially considering that in any of the many variation this makes for a great protein-veggie combination. Here’ s the recipe again with the correct image. We hope you’ll enjoy! WHAT YOU NEED 1 lb ground beef/turkey/chicken salt and pepper, to taste 2 Tbsp toasted sesame/olive oil 2 cloves garlic, minced 2 green onions, sliced
JUNE 15, 2018
Can be served at room temperature. Extra sriracha can be added before serving for those who prefer a hotter dish. This is your forum. Share your responses and opinions with TACHLIS readers by writing to firstname.lastname@example.org, or fax 877-331-3738, or mail to The Tachlis, 80 Red Schoolhouse Rd, Chestnut Ridge, NY 10977
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7 Surprising Health Benefits of Sleep by Jacques Doueck DDS, Diplomate Academy Clinical Sleep Disorders Disciplines
Sleep: it’s something we all need, and it’s something with many benefits. Some benefits are obvious; others are more surprising. Here is a list of seven surprising sleep benefits. Number seven is maintaining a healthy weight, and sleep does this in two ways. On the behavioral side, tired people are less likely to exercise. The other factor is the hormone leptin that tells your brain when you’ve had enough to eat. Lack of sleep causes leptin levels to drop, making a sleepy person feel hungry and eat too much. Number six on the list is better immunity. Lack of sleep weakens your immune system and makes you more vulnerable to viruses. On average, people who sleep less than seven hours a night are almost three times more likely to catch a virus, than those who sleep seven or more hours. Number five is an improved memory. While you are sleeping, your brain is at work processing and consolidating memories from the day. Memory consolidation allows you to practice the things you learned while you were awake. A good night’s sleep will help you perform better at something you are trying to learn. Number four on the list is creativity. The dreams that occur during REM sleep are the most coherent that occur during a night of sleeping. Our brains reorganize and restructure
while we are sleeping. Many of us are at our most creative when we awaken from a good night’s sleep. Number three is sharper attention. Adults who sleep less than six hours a night consistently tend to score lower in reasoning and vocabulary tests. Children who don’t get enough sleep can display ADHD-like symptoms. When children don’t get enough sleep, they may be hyperactive and inattentive. Number two on the list is accident avoidance. The National Highway Traffic Safety Administration’s National Motor Vehicle Crash Causation Study (NMVCCS) reports that drowsy drivers involved in a crash are twice as likely to make performance errors as compared to drivers who are not fatigued. The Institute of Medicine estimates that 205 of auto accidents in the U.S. results from drowsy driving—about one million crashes each year. Sleepy people are more accident prone. The number one item is a better hormone levels. The National Sleep Foundation found that in 26% of people, a good night’s sleep can help restore important hormone levels in both men and women. Even if you are getting enough hours of sleep – the quality of your sleep may be poor. The only way to know is with a sleep test – which can often be done in your own home. For a FREE Consultation call us at (718) 339-7982
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The Darkness of Physicality Rabbi Ben Tzion Shafier
“And Korach, son of Yizhar, son of Kehas, son of Levi, and Dassan and Aviram, sons of Eliav, together with Ohn, son of Peles, sons of Reuvain...” – Bamidbar 16:1 Korach was not chosen for a position as head of his shevet. He felt entitled to it, and his jealousy drove him to rebel against Moshe and Hashem. Recognizing that he couldn’t stand alone, he gathered 250 leaders of the nation, and they swore their allegiance to Korach and his cause. The plan was to depose Moshe as leader of the Jewish people, and in his stead appoint Korach. In the end, their rebellion failed and every man, woman, and child was swallowed by the ground. Of this group, only one man survived: Ohn, son of Peles. The Medrash explains that it was his wife who saved him. She said to him, “What do you gain from all of this? If Moshe wins, you are but a lackey. And if Korach wins you are still but a lackey.” Her logic penetrated his heart. “You are right,” he said, “but what can I do? I took an oath to remain loyal to the group. They will come tomorrow to get me, and I will be forced to join them.” His wife said, “Listen to my advice. I will stand outside our tent and uncover my hair. These are all holy men. When they see a woman not properly attired, they will run away.” She then gave him enough wine to drink until he fell asleep drunk, and she tied him to the bed. Early the next morning, she went outside, uncovered her hair, and waited. When the first members of Korach’s party came to bring Ohn to the demonstration, they saw a woman with her hair uncovered outside his tent. They immediately walked away. She remained there throughout the day. No man dared come to the tent. Then the time came for the standoff. When Korach’s men were standing together, they were swallowed up alive, but Ohn was not amongst them. This is a fulfillment of the verse, “A wise woman builds her house…” (Daas Z’kainim) How Could They Have Been So Foolish? This Daas Z’kainim is very difficult to understand. Korach’s group was made up of men of great piety. The Torah calls them “leaders of the nation, men of reputation.” And here we see an example of
JUNE 15, 2018
how careful they were in regards to mitzvah observance. Even though Ohn played a pivotal role in their cause, the mere sight of a woman with her hair uncovered made them run away. So how could these great people do something so egregious as to rebel against Hashem and His chosen representative? The answer to this question can best be understood when we focus on the impossibility of free will. When Hashem took the neshama and put it into this world, it was to give man the opportunity to make himself into what he will be for eternity. The essence of our purpose here is to choose what is right and proper and to turn away from what is wrong and evil. The problem, however, is that those options are set far apart and leave little choice. No thinking person would deliberately choose for himself a path of destruction. Every mitzvah helps us grow. Every sin damages us. Hashem warned us to do this and not to do that because it is good for us and will benefit us for eternity. So how does man have free will? He will choose good and only good — because it’s so clearly in his best interest. To allow for free will, Hashem put the brilliant neshama into a body that clouds its vision and darkens its sight. The desires and inclinations of the body don’t remain separate from me. They are mixed into my very essence and play out in my conscious mind. When I open my eyes in the morning, it isn’t my body that wants to just lie there unmoving – I am lazy. At lunch, it isn’t my stomach that cries out for food – I am hungry. I am both the brilliant neshama and the base animal instinct. And so, I want to live a life of meaning, and I want to live completely for the moment. I want to be good, proper and noble, and I just don’t care. I want this and I want that. Which one is the real me? The answer is both. And I am constantly changing, constantly in flux.
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34— emunah Because these desires come from within me, they also distort my vision. When I desire something, my vision can become so blinded that I can hotly pursue something damaging to me, and not only fail to see the danger involved, but even begin to see it as an ultimate good.
The Darkness of Physicality The Mesillas Yesharim (Perek 4) explains this with a parable. Imagine a man walking at night on an unlit country road. Because of the darkness, he is in danger of tripping. There are, however, two types of hazards he faces. The first is that he won’t see the pit in front of him and will fall in without even realizing the peril. The second danger, however, is more severe. The darkness can fool him so that he sees an object, but mistakes it for something else. He may look at a pillar in the distance and see it as a man. Or he might see a man and mistake him for a pillar. This menace is more severe because even if he were alert to the risk, he would ignore the warning signs because he sees with his own eyes that there is no danger. Physicality is like the darkness of night. It blinds a person and doesn’t allow him to see the danger in front of him. There are two types of mistakes that it causes. The first is that it doesn’t allow him to see the hazard. He will continue on a path of life that is self-destructive, and he won’t even recognize where he is headed until he is too far down the road to change course. The second mistake, however, is far more dangerous. It is when man is so fooled by the darkness of physicality that he sees the good as if it were bad and the bad as if it were good. At this point, warning a man about the danger is useless. He sees it, but views it as something virtuous. And so, he will clutch the evil against all warnings and against all wisdom because in his blindness, it appears as good.
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Korach and his Congregation This seems to be the answer to Korach and his people. They were Torah scholars, and they were holy Jews. And yet, they were blind. Korach was blinded by jealousy. He then presented arguments and proofs to the 250 men that Moshe was making up his own set of rules. He was dynamic and convincing. Once the group accepted Korach’s version of reality, they held fast to it. And then even the threat of a gruesome death didn’t faze them. It wasn’t that they didn’t see the danger. They did. But they saw it as a scare tactic, a way of getting them to abandon that which they knew was right. So it didn’t matter how pious they were; they were now on a new holy mission - to depose the power-hungry Moshe. And sometimes the truth is even worth dying for. The problem was that they had accepted falsehood as truth. This concept is very applicable to us as we too are human, and we too must be ever aware of the danger of ideologies that justify that which is evil and self-destructive. The difficulty is that when we are caught up in them, we don’t recognize them for what they are. A person’s convictions can drive him to greatness or bring him to the abyss — the only distinction being whether or not those convictions are correct. Hashem wants us to succeed, and in every generation He provides Torah leaders to guide us. The only way that a person can know whether his ideologies are right is by consulting with the accepted Torah leaders of his time. When a person puts away his agenda and his bias and asks guidance on the Torah approach, Hashem directs him to the truth. Rabbi Shafier is the founder of the Shmuz.com – The Shmuz is an engaging, motivating shiur that deals with real life issues. All of the Shmuzin are available free of charge at www.theShmuz.com or on the Shmuz App for iPhone or Android.
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The Blank Check
The Real Story of Howard Schultz As told by Rabbi Dovid Orlofsky In 2002, Howard Schultz, CEO of Starbucks, visited Israel. During his trip, he was privileged to have a private audience with Rav Nosson Tzvi Finkel, zt”l, the late Mir Rosh Yeshiva, together with a few other prominent businessmen. The group was ushered into the rosh yeshiva’s study, not knowing anything at the time about Rav Nosson Tzvi. They all sat down. And then they waited. When the doors opened fifteen minutes later, in walked Rav Nosson Tzvi. Shocked to see that he suffered from Parkinson’s disease, the men found it difficult to look at him. Suddenly, they heard a bang on the table. “Gentlemen, look at me, and look at me right now,” the rosh yeshiva said firmly. “I only have a few minutes for you because I know you’re all busy American businessmen.” As they sat there mesmerized, Rav Nosson Tzvi continued, “Who can tell me what the lesson of the Holocaust is?” The men began fumbling to come up with the right answer. “We will never, ever forget?” one man suggested. The Rosh Yeshiva then called on someone else. “We will never, ever again be a victim or bystander!” But Rav Nosson Tzvi had a different answer in mind This is the rosh yeshiva’s answer in the words of Howard Schultz: “You guys just don’t get it. OK, gentlemen, let me tell you the essence of the human spirit. As you know, during the Holocaust, the people were transported in the worst possible, inhumane manner by railcar. They thought they were going to a work camp. We all know they were going to a death camp. After hours and hours in this inhumane corral with no light, no bathroom, cold, they arrived at the camps. The doors swung wide open and they were blinded by the light. Men were separated from women, mothers from daughters, fathers from sons. They went off to the bunkers to sleep. “As they went to the barracks area to sleep, only one person out of every six was given a blanket. The person who received the blanket had to make a decision: Am I going to push the blanket to the other five people who did not get one, or am I going to pull it toward myself to stay warm? It was during this defining moment that we learned the power of the human spirit, because we pushed the blanket to five others.” “And then the Rosh Yeshiva stood up and said to all of us, ‘Take your blanket. Take it back to America and push it to five other people.’” The words of the rosh yeshiva hit home and indelibly left an impression on all those who were in attendance. But let me tell you the rest of the story that not everyone knows about.
Rav Nosson Tzvi Finkel’s gabbai attends my Chumash classes. One day, he told me that Howard Schultz took another trip to Israel and went to visit Rav Nosson Tzvi again. During this visit, however, only the Rosh Yeshiva, Howard Schultz and the gabbai were present. Howard Schultz proceeded to take out a blank check, sign his name and hand it to Rav Nosson Tzvi. “Here Rabbi,” he said, “fill it out for whatever you want.” At the time, the monthly budget for the Mir Yeshiva was 2 million dollars. Rav Nosson Tzvi was responsible to raise the money despite his debilitating disease. He could have written $2,000,000 on the check. “I can do whatever I want with this check?” he asked Howard Schultz. “That’s right, Rabbi.” Filling the check out for $1,200, he handed it back to Howard Schultz and said, “Take this check to that store across the street and tell them that I sent you to purchase a pair of tefillin. And then put them on every day. That is what you can do for me.” Rav Nosson Tzvi had a blanket called Torah and mitzvos. Instead of looking at Howard Schultz and thinking, “What can I get out of him?” he looked at him and thought, “What can I do for him?” We all have a blanket that we can push to our fellow brothers and sisters and change the world with. Whether it be our money, our time or a simple smile, we all have the ability to make a difference. People will try to convince you otherwise, but it is not true. You can change the world. Rabbi Dovid Orlofsky is a graduate of Yeshiva Chofetz Chaim in New York and the Pressburg Yeshiva in Jerusalem. He is a former regional director for the National Council of Synagogue Youth and is an internationally acclaimed lecturer and educator. Rabbi Orlofsky has published essays and has been quoted in the New York Times, as well as other national publications.
Written by Elan Perchik Editorial Director of TorahAnytime.com Watch/listen/download the video/audio version of this Torah class and thousands of others by top Torah scholars at www.torahanytime.com. Also, visit our webpage to subscribe to the acclaimed weekly TorahAnyTimes Parasha Newsletter featuring the best stories, insights and lessons from renowned speakers. All content is free and updated daily. JUNE 15, 2018
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Summer Camp Strategies for Healthy Eating
As a nutritionist, I am frequently asked by mothers and teenagers alike how to best prepare for a healthy summer at sleepaway camp. Summer camp poses a unique challenge for many kids. Children have to adjust to a schedule and environment that they are not accustomed to. In addition, new and unfamiliar foods can become a reason to skip meals and rely on junk food to fill the void. As a camper, there is usually limited access to a refrigerator and mothers cannot create meals to suit their kids’ preferences. However, sleepaway camp is also an opportunity for kids to choose their own food and exercise decision-making. By not having mommy at their disposal, the kids learn to develop self-efficacy and take responsibility for their choices. Here are some strategies to help your child have a happy and healthy summer while away from you: Teach your children about healthy eating. Teach kids about MyPlate and what a healthy meal consists of. Though it may seem surprising, few parents actually educate children on what the components of a healthy meal are. Meal times at camp often pose children with a lot of variety, and if kids don’t know what they should be putting on their plates, they’ll often just take whatever they are most in the mood of. Unfortunately, many of the best-tasting foods are also the lowest in necessary nutrients like calcium, protein, and vitamin D. MyPlate is a USDA icon which displays what a balanced meal should be comprised of. This includes a grain serving, a protein, a fruit, vegetable, and milk serving. Ideally, your children should strive to have lunch and dinner include most of these components. Breakfast should include at least a grain, protein or milk, and a fruit. While tuna on bread with sliced cucumbers, is an OK lunch, a cream-based pasta dish should best be complemented with some other healthier sidekick. Similarly, cereal and milk or a yogurt and fruit are nutrient-rich choices, a bowl
JUNE 15, 2018
of refined farina and french toast is not a balanced combination. Pack your kid with healthy snack options: Many parents feel guilty at the thought of sending their kids away for a month or two without their favorite snacks. Moderation is the key to everything, and I always say that you can include a little of what the kid wants without overdoing it. There is no need to include a year’s supply of chocolate licorice for a month’s stay at camp. Do include a package or so, but make the rest of the options of your child’s go-to snacks relatively good ones. Some nutrient-dense snack options include granola bars, fruit and nut bars, dried fruit or no-sugar-added fruit leather, whole grain pretzels, soy or quinoa chips, popcorn, and dry-roasted nuts. Some canned fruit and vegetables, such as pineapple in its own juice, comes in flip-top, easy to open cans that are perfect for camp. Similarly, cups of applesauce are easy on-the-go and non-perishable. There is no need to send your kid along with fried, MSG-filled, or highly sugared and food-colored snacks; your kid will get plenty of these from trading with friends, anyways. Make sure to have a backup strategy if they don’t like a meal. Though your child will be getting most of his or her nutrition at camp meals, if your child is a picky eater, you might want to do a little research into the things the camp has available in the event a child doesn’t like a particular lunch or dinner. Many camps have good default options available. It might also be a good idea to pack some healthy in-a-pinch, non-perishable meal substitutes to make sure your kid doesn’t go hungry.
Leah Wolofsky is the owner of Boro Park Nutrition, a nutrition private practice located at 1225 44th street which accepts most insurances. She can be contacted at 347-746-0453 or at BoroParkNutrition@gmail.com.
Leah Green will TREAT the problem as well as address the underlying REASON and possible causes for the problem
For example, whole wheat crackers and small to-go peanut butter packs, melba toasts with small cans of tuna and packets of mayo, or a protein-rich cereal which can be combined with milk from the kitchen are all great, easy options. Activities should be played—not watched. Your child should be actively engaged in sports. Children spend ten months a year in school and don’t engage in much physical activity. You want to make sure your child is spending active time outdoors, rather than just sitting on the side watching other kids play. If your child doesn’t like a particular sport, consider playing more of it as a family. In addition, you might want to speak to counselors and camp directors to encourage all children to participate in sports and activities, whether or not they are particularly good at it. Though kids might not see a point in playing if they are not going to win anyways, their health depends on it. Don’t skimp on sleep. While it seems tempting to be part of the cool group and stay up all night, sleep is vital for proper functioning at any age. In addition, sleep deprivation is directly correlated to overeating and making bad nutritional choices. When someone’s tired, their body focusses on getting quick energy, and what better a place to find quick energy than sugar-packed products? Additionally, sleep deprivation is associated with increased levels of ghrelin, the “hunger hormone.” Bottom line: sleep is important for more than just mental focus. It’s important for keeping nutrition in check, too. Stress hydration, but limit sports drinks. Staying hydrated is important throughout the summer, but unless your child is seriously engaged in heavy-sweat activities for more than four hours a day, sugary beverages are a completely unnecessary waste of calories. Sports drink manufacturers spend a lot of money on marketing trying to convince well-meaning parents to provide substitutes for healthier drinks and leave water on the wayside. However, unless directed otherwise by a healthcare professional, water should be your child’s drink of choice. Too much sugary drinking is the number one cause of childhood obesity. So long as kids are eating properly, water is the best, most purifying beverage to replace the water lost by activities. Sending your kids off to camp is a great opportunity to reinforce good nutritional habits in your children. Many parents of overweight offspring send their kids off to camp with the hope that the activities that their child will engage in will help get them more in shape. These parents soon realize that the same bad habits that were leading the child to gain weight in camp, such as skipping meals and filling up on snacks and junk food, are simply repeated by the child when they are away from their parents. Moreover, while not being under the parent’s watchful eye, it’s all too easy to spend a canteen account on ice pops and sodas all summer long. Remember that the rigorous structure at camp is never a substitute for quality nutrition education. However, by taking a few simple steps to prepare your child, you’ll be assured your child’s nutritional needs are being met, even when they’re away from home.
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With so many allergic to this superfood, peanuts have been getting a bad rap, which is unfair, especially considering how healthful this little nut (that isn’t really a nut) actually is. Research studies have proven that peanuts feature an array of nutrients that promote many areas of health. First, there’s heart health, because peanuts are good sources of vitamin E, niacin, folate, protein and manganese. In addition, peanuts provide resveratrol, the phenolic antioxidant also found in red grapes and red wine that is thought to be responsible for the French paradox: the fact that in France, people consume a diet not low in fat, but somehow have a lower risk of cardiovascular disease compared to the U.S. Peanuts contain oleic acid, the healthful fat found in olive oil, and even more, new research shows these tasty legumes are also as rich in antioxidants as many fruits. No, they can’t compete with pomegranates in antioxidant content, but they rival strawberries, apples, carrots and even beets! What’s more, roasting can increase peanuts' p-coumaric acid levels, boosting their overall antioxidant content by as much as 22%. The cardio-vascular benefits of peanut consumption have long been tracked, and although eating them even only once a week has shown to be healthful, consuming peanuts at least 4 times a week reduces risk of coronary heart disease by 37% compared to those who never or seldom ate them. Each additional serving of peanuts per week was associated with an average 8.3% reduced risk of coronary heart disease. A number of studies have shown that nutrients found in peanuts, including folic acid, phytosterols, phytic acid (inositol hexaphosphate) and resveratrol, may have anti-cancer effects. As a rich source for all these nutrients—including the phytosterol beta-sisterol, which has demonstrated anti-cancer actions - peanuts have long been considered a colon cancer-preventive food. Eating peanuts just 2 or more times each week was associated with a 58% lowered risk of colon cancer in women and a 27% lowered risk in men. Plus, twenty years of dietary data collected from one study of over 80,000 women, shows that women who eat least 1 ounce of nuts, peanuts or peanut butter each week have a 25% lower risk of developing gallstones. And research published in the Journal of Neurology, Neurosurgery and Psychiatry indicates that regular consumption of niacin-rich foods like peanuts provides protection against Alzheimer's disease and age-related cognitive decline. Although peanuts have proven to be so beneficial, many still avoid them for fear of weight gain. It would behoove us to look at the research and recognize that such fears are groundless. In fact, people who eat nuts at least twice a week are much less likely to gain weight than those who almost never eat nuts. That is because peanuts are rich in monounsaturated fats, the good type of fat – the kind that some health and weight-loss diets actually encourage. One study showed that a diet that emphasized peanuts and peanut butter decreased cardiovascular disease risk by around 21% compared to the average American diet.
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Not-SoHiddenCosts By Raizy Zinreich
JUNE 15, 2018
My friend Chavi had just walked her daughter up the hill to her bunkhouse, helping her deposit three twelvepacks of spring water plus the rest of her luggage on her bed. About to drive back to the bungalow colony, she noticed the mother of one of her daughter’s classmates; they had seen each other and exchanged small talk at various high school functions.
“I don’t think this is about the clothes. It’s more about fitting in, and not being different than her peers. I guess that’s important at age fifteen. But the money we’ve spent has left us overextended and I’m zapped – financially and emotionally – from the whole experience.”
My friend walked over to the other woman, intending to say a quick, “Hi, have a great summer,” and then leave. But after offering that friendly greeting, something made her stop instead of heading back to her car.
Not having any solution to offer, but assuring her that her experience was common, Chavi wished her a good summer and much nachas.
The other woman’s expression seemed unusually strained.
“Believe me, I knew exactly what she meant,” she told me later. “My Lea Malka was in tears because I wanted to buy her the shirts without a certain logo. And the need for new pajamas – the right kind – was, in her crying eyes, non-negotiable. I gave in on some things, not on others. There has to be a better way. Camp itself is expensive enough; it shouldn’t have to cost even more because of unnecessary purchases.”
Chavi could not decide what to do. She didn’t know this person well, and didn’t want to overstep her boundaries. On the other hand, to ignore obvious pain would be unfeeling. Trying to keep her tone light yet caring, she asked “Is everything OK? I’m sure you’re missing Bruchie already, but she’s going to have such a great time –” “It’s not that,” Bruchie’s mother interrupted. And then, this bright, capable, thirty-eight year old burst into tears. Turning off her cellular phone and banishing all thoughts of laundry, swimming, and the lunch menu (macaroni or grilled cheese sandwiches?), Chavi gently led her to the front seat of her own car. She turned on the air conditioner, closed the windows, and prepared to listen. “I am so drained,” the woman sobbed. “The stress and exhaustion have just gotten to me.” “Are you talking about all of the packing?” Chavi wondered. “No, I’m pretty organized and my daughter does a lot of it herself. I’m talking about the exorbitant cost of all of the things she supposedly needs for camp. I can’t tell you how much tension this has created. When Bruchie insisted that ten tee shirts were not enough, that everyone else was bringing at least fifteen, I could not believe it. I didn’t have the heart to tell her, “No,” and paid for the other five with a credit card. It will take us months to pay off these charges. My husband is furious. But what could we do? Bruchie’s a good kid, she’s responsible at school and at home, and she’s not materialistic. “That’s why,” by this time the woman sounded calmer,
After hearing my friend’s story, I was interested in knowing whether this issue struck a universal chord. Everyone I talked to acknowledged that the problem existed. Most agreed that in the vast majority of cases, it was not about the desire of the pre-teen or teen to be fancy or own costly clothing. It arose out of the need to fit in, to not be different, to be secure in the knowledge that one was not a “neb.” Some parents out there, blessed with admirable strength and confidence, are brave enough to face down these pressures. “In our home,” says Malka Friedman, mother of a large family, “there’s a phrase with which everyone is familiar – ‘the Friedman house.’ In the Friedman house, this is what we do. In the Friedman house, we give each girl x number of tops because this is what we believe is practical and sufficient. What other people are doing does not count in the Friedman house. Our kids
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know we really mean it, we believe what we’re saying, and they accept it. They grow up knowing that a well-fitting, good quality hand-me-down is a good thing, and does not impact in any way on the quality of the camp experience.” Malka added, “A lot of times, the intense peer pressure the child feels mirrors that of the parents. A parent can’t expect to strive to keep up with his neighbors’ standards of house, car, furniture, or simcha hall, and not have it filter down to their family. Kids absorb more than we think they do.” “And yet,” she said, “we need to also recognize the differences in our children’s natures. Some children do need that material extra, in a very real, emotional sense. In that case, a wise parent will give it. I find that the other children, somehow, understand.” Rivka Unger is another understanding mother. She understands adolescent angst. She also understands the value of not being engulfed by that angst. And she understands her family’s budget. Here’s how Rivka handles it: “From the time each of my girls turns about twelve or thirteen, we make a list together and we give her a maximum budget. We talk about exactly what she’ll need for camp (and we do a similar thing before Yom Tov), and then I’ll say, ‘Okay, I think three hundred dollars should cover it; what do you think? You think we might need three fifty? Let’s see – maybe you’re right.’ And we establish that as the maximum, and then she has to shop. It really works out well, because the child gets practice in the fine art of budgeting, working out a way to color within the lines. Do I want that shirt because it matches three different skirts, even though it costs ten dollars more than my other tops? Fine. Maybe, then, I don’t really need eight bottles of shampoo and the same number of conditioners.” One person I spoke to mentioned that, in a certain camp, there is a rule that staff members must wear the same outfit on leil Shabbos and Shabbos day. The across-the-board reaction of mothers to this piece of news was, “What a wonderful idea!” I think it might be wonderful to have a uniform dress code in camp. Couldn’t we institute guidelines such as, “black, blue, or tan skirts and solid tops only?” The idea is that, without undue regimentation, the need, the pressure, to overspend in order to fit in with an artificial and expensive set of rules, would abate considerably. And that, I think, is a really good reason to consider such a solution. I think that Chavi, and Bruchie’s mother, and probably your child’s mother, would agree.
Stately Pickpockets Chanie Gluck Isn’t it strange that we need to acquire information on how to retrieve the millions that are being held by the state comptrollers? Shouldn’t it be the other way around? We should be careful not to allow precious Yiddish gelt to end up by the state in the first place! This week TACHLIS brings 8 tips that are important for you to know.
Keep Accounts Active
This is the most important thing you can do to keep your accounts from getting turned over to the state. The key is “customer-initiated” activity. Just because your savings account is earning interest or being charged a monthly fee, doesn’t mean it has customer-initiated activity. If you’ve created savings accounts for your children, make sure to keep an eye on those too. Once a year call and check on the balance, or make a deposit or withdrawal. The dormancy period begins with the last activity on the account. A good idea would be to do this on your birthday - as a present to your future self.
Take Stock of Your Stocks
Like bank accounts, you need to have customer-initiated activity, so don’t rely on your broker for this. Your proxy can not count toward this. The state of Washington just enacted legislation that will allow the State Treasurer to sell the stocks as soon as they come into state possession, regardless of what the market is doing (translation: if the stock is incidentally doing bad just then, precious money can be lost forever!). Thankfully, this isn’t the law in New York, but if you’re not on top of things, you won’t know when it might change. Not staying on top of your stocks can also mean that you might never know about money that should come to you. Among the millions returned, the largest amounts come from stocks. In New York State, $4 million was recently returned to an individual who had no idea that it was due him. Pay attention to when you are supposed to get your dividends. If they don’t come when expected, follow up.
Get Your Utility Deposits Back
If you’ve been current with your utility payments for at least one year ask about getting your deposit for electricity, water and gas refunded. They might say it happens automatically, but ask when you can expect to see it, and stay on top of it. Better yet, request that it be credited to your account so there is no chance of the check getting lost.
Get Your Paycheck
If you’re leaving your job, make sure to notify your employer and double check that they have the correct address on file. Most important, make
JUNE 15, 2018
sure you get all the money that is coming to you. This sounds obvious, but if the last day that you work is the first day of the new pay period, you will have two paychecks coming, not one. If in doubt, ask when you will get your final check – and look out for it.
Change your address
If you move or change your legal name, notify everyone you do business with including online business with whom you do online billing or banking. No, the post office isn’t enough. The change of address service with the post office is only good for one year. In addition, change your address with the retirement plan administrator and all of the employer-sponsored benefit plans such as health, dental, vision and life insurance. Your employer is not responsible for doing this. Notify the IRS, too. Don’t laugh. Tax refunds are not forwarded. There is $153 million in tax refunds being held by the IRS that were returned because of a wrong address. You have three years to claim it or they will keep it!
How many times have you stuck a check in a drawer to deposit later? Too often it gets shoved to the back and then outdated. Eventually it ends up in unclaimed property. Make sure to cash your checks promptly!
Inform Your Beneficiary of Your Financial Assets
And update your life insurance beneficiary information. This is often overlooked. Call and make sure the beneficiary name and contact information are correct. In addition, tell your beneficiary about the policy and who it’s through. Also, write a list of your all financial assets like bank account, stock certificates, insurance policies, utility and rent deposits and make sure a trusted family member or friend knows where to find it. Don’t forget to include not only your safe deposit box key, but also the bank and branch plus the box number where it is located.
Lost on the World Wide Web
Don’t forget your digital assets such as a PayPal account, an eBay or Amazon store, cryptocurrency (like Bitcoin), and credits on any online site. In addition, there is value to domain names you own. If you don’t entrust someone with your login and password information, the money may wither away in limbo until it gets turned over to the state. They may not be able to renew valuable domain names and that can have disastrous consequences for an established business.
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Use these tips to ensure that your money doesn’t end up languishing in state coffers when it could instead be doing so much good by you. Chanie Gluck from Funds Forgotten is a professional finder and can be contacted at 347-452-7651 or firstname.lastname@example.org While you’re at it, don’t forget your online digital photos. They may not have financial value but let’s face it – photos are priceless. Save your logins and passwords, and make sure you’ve entrusted someone with the information.
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Every Week TACHLIS features an abridged list of Forgotten Funds from a random street in Brooklyn. These funds are now held by the NYS Comptroller, who is currently overseeing appromimately 15 billion(!) dollars, waiting to be claimed by their rightful owners. You may be one of them! Hey, you never know! To find out if you are owed money, or to retrieve your finds, contact the Comptroller’s office, or a trusted finder with whom you will have to share personal information. Where is this money coming from? Why should I check to see if my name is on the list? For detailed answers refer to the interview in TACHLIS #128. Yiddish Gelt can do so much good. Don’t let it be lost forever! ACKERMAN S|77 ROSS ST ASHKENAZI JACOB|51 ROSS ST 9B AVNEI MILUIM INC|C/O ASHER ANSHEL SCHWARTZ 22 ROSS ST
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56— share sunshine —readers
Something Good This Way Comes
Sometimes life can get tough and it seems like we are
facing various difficulties and challenges one after the other. Recently, my students taught me a profound lesson: when things seem to be “down,” Hashem is “up” to something – good! I was delayed one day on my way to school. I arrived to near-silent corridors, not even an errant student in sight. Second period was in full swing as I stealthily walked down the hallways. I was really very late for class. As soon as I entered the classroom, my students sprang up in relief. “Mrs. Krausz, where were you? We were so concerned when we were told you were held up. Is everything OK?” I assured them that that if I made it to class, everything was fine. “And girls,” I reminded them, “‘held up’ can mean two things. I was merely delayed. But if you’re interested to hear about my hectic day, I’ll tell you all about it.” The class promptly quieted down and I began, “My saga actually began earlier this week. This past Monday, I was lucky enough to have appointments with not one but two repairmen at my house. The first was a technician who came to check out my washing machine for the umpteenth time this year. He regretfully told me that the
APRIL 15, JUNE 1, 27, 2018 2018 2018
company’s lawyer said he was no longer required to service my machine, even though it had an extended five-year warranty. They had already put thousands of dollars into repairing it and no, they would not replace it, despite the warranty explicitly noting that they are required to provide a new machine if the old one cannot be repaired.” Ruchy raised her hand immediately, “Mrs. Krausz, can you please bring all your laundry to school tomorrow? My sisters and I can wash, dry, iron and fold all the clothing in no time. Honestly!” I smiled at Ruchy. When I had asked my students to describe one room in their house, while they all described their kitchens and bedrooms, Ruchy had described her family’s spacious, sensible laundry room with its multiple machines, a sink, a Rowenta steam iron and ironing board. For a fleeting second I imagined myself schlepping garbage bags filled with laundry from my Boro Park home to Bais Leah in Williamsburg. No, it would be just a tiny bit cumbersome. “Next,” I continued, “was the oven repairman. He was actually very pleasant. He told me that he ordered a whole new unit that, Baruch Hashem, was covered under the guarantee. He would be rushing the delivery, so it would arrive by the end of the week.”
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58— sunshine This time there were more hands. I called on Raizy. “Mrs. Krausz, can I call home?” Raizy questioned. “It’s Wednesday, so I know my mother prepared her signature meatballs and spaghetti. I’m sure she has enough for your family as well. Can I ask her?” I really have the sweetest students. I thanked Raizy for her offer and explained that the gas range on top is still working fine.
I do not know why this is happening now, but I do know that this will make for a real good story to tell my children and students.
“Which brings me to what happened on Tuesday. Early Tuesday morning, I prepared a pot of chicken on the stovetop, with the intentions of closing the flame before I went to work. At twelve o’clock I left my house, totally not remembering my poor chicken cooking away on a nice-sized flame. Recess-time, one of the most oft discussed conversations in the teachers’ room is what we are preparing for supper. It was only when I listened to the conversation that it suddenly dawned on me that I had better call a neighbor and ask her to close the fire. Not one neighbor, however, answered the phone. It was close to Purim and they were all out either shopping for costumes or mishloach manos. At five o’clock, I gingerly entered my kitchen, sniffing for any unusual smells and checking for soot while feeling for heat. B’chasdei Hashem, the house smelled delicious and the kitchen looked fine. Best of all, the chicken tasted wonderful at supper time! When I was complimented, I told my family that I am glad they enjoyed the chicken, but I do not think I can repeat the miraculous, ‘more-luck-than-skill,’ secret cooking process.” “And now, for today’s part of the story,” I told my class. “and the explanation for why I was delayed.” The girls were still listening, rapt. “Although all the Boro Park teachers usually travel to Williamsburg together, today I had an appointment and had to make my own arrangements from a different location. I expected to arrive just a few minutes later than the other teachers. I took a cab and was making rather good timing, but as the driver was about to pull off the BQE to enter Williamsburg at Flushing Avenue, the car suddenly stalled. Nothing the driver did would get the engine going. The car would just not start again and we were in middle of the highway! After a few moments, Steve from Steve’s Iron Works pulled up beside us and offered to pull us off the highway. The driver shifted the car to neutral and slowly the vehicle was connected with chains and lifted up on a slant. As Steve drove his tow truck with the driver and me in the tilted car, I thought, ‘I do not know why this is
APRIL 15, 1, 27, 2018 2018 JUNE 2018
happening now, but I do know that this will make for a real good story to tell my children and students.’ “At Flushing Avenue, the dispatcher had prepared a different car to take me to my destination. Before I got out, the cabbie told me, ‘I must tell you two things. First, I always check my car in the morning before I start driving to make sure it is in perfect running condition and the tank has ample fuel. Today was no exception and I really have no clue what went wrong. My apologies, ma’am. Second, I have to thank you for being my passenger. Someone else might have yelled at me and been upset, but you took it all in stride. Thank you.’ “I pointed upwards and said, ’The Almighty is the Driver who calls the stops. He orchestrates my schedule. How would becoming irate help me? And why would I get upset when I know that I have a Master Driver at the wheel?’ “The other car then brought me to school.” I noticed Ruchy, Raizy, and Chayala nodding their heads, immersed in an earnest conversation. I wondered if they were discussing my laundry or oven complications. Chayala asked for permission to talk. “Mrs. Krausz, when so many challenges happen, it can only mean one thing.” Uh oh, I thought, as I wondered what they had in mind. Was there something I had done wrong or someone I needed to ask forgiveness from? Chayala’s deep blue eyes looked at me seriously, “We concluded that after experiencing so many difficulties, something very, very good will happen b’ezras Hashem.” By the next time I taught that class I had some very exciting news to share. My family was celebrating a beautiful simcha, the engagement of my oldest daughter. My students taught me a powerful lesson that I have taken to heart. Now I know that when I experience difficulties, there is no need to worry. It simply means that something very, very good is, b’ezras Hashem, on the way. Teachers prepare beautiful lessons. Students, however, can impart more. Mitalmidosai yoser mikulam!
TA C H L I S M A G A Z I N E
Ask the Experts
A Case of the Blahs to being grateful. But eventually this is a great path towards happiness.
Dear Center for Anxiety, These days I feel I’m going through the motions. I’m stagnant. I don’t feel there’s much new going on, even when I learn a new blatt or hear a new vort. I have a beautiful family, many friends, my learning is going well, and I am decently social, but it’s like I just can’t find a sense of happiness anymore. Sincerely, Blah
Dear Blah, With all our responsibilities and distractions in the modern day, it’s easy to lose track of the most fundamental and important things in life. It sounds like you have a genuinely good life – one that previous generations would never have dreamed of. Ironically, when things are going well it’s easy to be focused on sadness and frustrations and overlook small but wonderful moments of goodness in our day. In such a situation, it takes effort and energy to muster up one of the most important (and underutilized) emotions to protect us against depression and sadness: Gratitude. Question: When is the last time you stopped to appreciate the warmth that your heater provides in the winter? Or the fact that you have running water or a toilet? Or that you have two hands, each with five fingers, and that everyone in your family has the same. The point here isn’t to make you feel bad for feeling ungrateful, but to point out that it is easy to forget about some of the most important aspects of our lives, and count our burdens instead of blessings. The good news, though, is that for most people, our brains (unlike professional cameras) can easy switch from one lens to another. We can choose to view the world through a lens of issues and problems to solve, or immediately divert our attention to all the wondrous and magnificent good that we have in our lives. For this reason, practicing gratitude exercises is a terrific way to change our thinking to be more positive. Like any skill, choosing to be grateful requires persistence and an action plan. It means we have to work towards acknowledging sources of goodness in our lives. For individuals (such as yourself) who are at a baseline of negativity, it takes effort to make an emotional shift at first, and change from focusing on disappointments JUNE 15, 2018
Davening is replete with opportunities to practice gratitude. From Modeh Ani in the morning to brachos on food throughout the day, to Asher Yatzar and beyond, one of the primary purposes of our tefillah seems to be building our sense of hakaras hatov (gratitude). So how about focusing on one bracha each day and saying it with the kavana that you are grateful. Psychological science suggests that one moment of gratitude each day can make a noticeable difference in our moods.
Beyond that, one activity we recommend to patients is an exercise called “three goods.” The premise is simple. Keep a notepad and pen near your bed. Each day, upon waking (and saying modeh ani) take a moment to list three things for which you are thankful, grateful, or appreciative. If mornings are too difficult, try it just before falling asleep to end your day with gratitude. Try this for one to two weeks, and see if you can spot a change in your approach to the world and your ability to feel appreciative, grateful, or thankful. If you find yourself struggling to come up with items, remember that no item is too big or small in terms of importance. It could be something simple like “my teeth” or “I made it to kollel on time today,” or something larger like “a child.” This exercise is less about finding things to be thankful for and more about internalizing the feeling of gratitude, and giving personal meaning to positive experiences. For each item, include what caused the event, and most importantly, how the event resonates emotionally. Notwithstanding the above, it could be that gratitude isn’t enough to take you out of your slump. There are many other strategies to cope with sadness (that we have written about before) and sometimes people need more than one to feel happy and connected again. But you will not and cannot err in working on gratitude as a first step. All our best, Center for Anxiety David H. Rosmarin, Ph.D., ABPP, is an assistant professor in the Department of Psychiatry at Harvard Medical School part-time, and a board certified clinical psychologist. He also directs the Center for Anxiety which has offices in Manhattan, Brooklyn, Monsey, and Boston. Yoni Sobin, PsyD, is a postdoctoral fellow at the Center for Anxiety’s Brooklyn office. He specializes in treating adults struggling with anxiety disorders, ADHD, PTSD, depression, and related concerns. We look forward to readers' questions and concerns regarding topics related to mental health and treatment, and we'll publish up to 2 letters and responses monthly. Email submissions to email@example.com, subject: “Tachlis Magazine.” To protect anonymity, names and other identifying details will be changed prior to publication.
Yes, You Can!
“You miss 100% of the shots you don't take” – Wayne Gretzky, Hall of Fame Hockey Player Rifka Schonfeld
“I can’t seem to focus.” “I have been struggling with organization for as long as I can remember.” “I’m really bad at sitting still.” “I just can’t lose weight.” “I will never make it to the dinner on time.” “I am not good at math.” Perhaps because of their previous experiences, my clients often begin their conversations with me listing to what they “can’t do.” Of course, they are coming to me for help in improving their lives and it makes sense that their focus is on what they are struggling with, but one of the first steps towards improving their lives is refo-
JUNE 15, 2018
cusing their attention away from their struggles and onto their successes. A few years ago, a female tennis player who had been stuck in the middle of the tennis rankings for several seasons switched coaches and began to steadily win matches and move up within the top five female players in the world. When a reporter asked her coach why she was suddenly becoming a superstar under his tutelage, he responded, “In the past, her coaches focused on what she could not do, and tried to improve those areas. While her game got better, she would often become frustrated and nervous when on the court and one of her problem areas came up. My approach is very
different. We focus on what she can do and work to improve those areas. Then, when she gets into those situations on the court, she is confident and prepared.” This coach’s method is a hugely important one within education and life as well. A “can’t do” attitude or a focus on the negative only helps reinforce those destructive ideas in the mind of the sufferer. So, what are some ways that you can cure that “can’t do” attitude? • Set “Can Do” Goals. Regardless of the disability or struggle, you should identify where you want to be. This way, you can create a step-by-step plan for how to get there. Breaking apart a long-term goal into multiple shorter steps can help the task seem more manageable. For instance, if you would like to declutter your home, that might trigger the response, “I just can’t do it. There is too much. I don’t know where to start.” Instead, break the goal into smaller pieces: “First, I am going to declutter my living room. I am going to start with the bookshelves and then move to the newspapers and magazines next to the couch.” Once you accomplish that small step, you can move to the next room. • Concentrate on the positive. So much of what we hear on the news and in the world around us is negative. The key to success is focusing on the positive in our daily interactions with others. For those dealing with disabilities, focus on the things you can do, for instance, people with ADHD are generally very creative and out of the box thinkers. Instead of focusing on the difficulties paying attention, those with ADHD should
64— channel their energy into their creativity. Even something as small as an intentional smile can set you on the right path. Research in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found that smiling can actually make you less anxious and self-doubting. When you use the muscles in your face to smile, those muscles trigger hormones in your brain that make you more relaxed and happy. • Surround yourself with support. If the people around you don’t believe in you, there is no way that you will learn to believe in yourself. Therefore, separate yourself from your “friends” who put you down or underestimate your abilities. Instead, cultivate friendships with people who support you and your strengths. If your friends and family believe that you can do it, eventually you will start believing it too! • Fake it until you make it. Often, success is about going through the motions no matter how many times you have failed in the past. Regardless of whether you believe that you are going to succeed, you “talk the talk and walk the walk” as if you will succeed. You have a much better chance at success if you attack the problem with gusto and confidence than if you
do not approach it at all. Learning Disabilities and “Can Do Attitudes” Children and adults with learning disabilities (LD) often encounter problems with tasks that “regular people” find simple and undemanding. These struggles can often make those with LD believe that they cannot succeed at most endeavors, no matter how hard they try. While the above tips hold true for all people suffering from a “can’t do” attitude, there are specific tips that can help parents of children dealing with LD: • Instill social skills. Not surprisingly, if children with LD feel confident socially, they will be more likely to foster a “can do” attitude academically. Therefore, it is essential to help your child with LD master social skills in order to provide him with an area of his life that is easy and enjoyable. • Model confidence. If you show your child that you believe you can conquer the world, ultimately, you are teaching him to act in the same way. Remember, from a very young age, your child follows your lead. If he sees you believing that you will suc-
ceed even at difficult tasks, he will be more likely to believe in himself. • Set realistic expectations. While it is important to be positive and proactive, do not push your child well beyond his capabilities. While he needs to believe he can do difficult tasks, if he constantly fails at his goals because they are impossible for him, he will not be able to gain a “can do” attitude. Just remember, you can never succeed if you don’t at least try! An acclaimed educator and education consultant, Mrs. Rifka Schonfeld has served the Jewish community for close to thirty years. She founded and directs the widely acclaimed educational program, SOS, servicing all grade levels in secular as well as Hebrew studies. A kriah and reading specialist, she has given dynamic workshops and set up reading labs in many schools. In addition, she offers evaluations G.E.D. preparation, social skills training and shidduch coaching, focusing on building self-esteem and self-awareness. She can be reached at 718-382-5437 or at firstname.lastname@example.org. You can view her website at rifkaschonfeldsos.com. Register now for a mindsets and ADHD workshop by Dr. Robert Brooks on November 13, 2018. Please call Mrs. Schonfeld at 718-382-5437 for more information.
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What you need: NON-STICK BAKING SPRAY 1 CUP (YOUR CHOICE) FLOUR 1/4 CUP ROLLED OATS 1 TBSP WHEAT GERM 2 TSP CHIA SEEDS (OPTIONAL) 1/2 TSP KOSHER SALT 1/4 TSP GROUND CINNAMON 1/3 CUP PEANUT BUTTER 1/3 CUP LIGHT BROWN SUGAR, PACKED 3 TBSP VEGETABLE OIL 1 EGG WHITE 1 OZ BITTERSWEET CHOCOLATE, MELTED
JUNE 15, 2018
What you do:
Preheat the oven to 350ᵒ. Line a 9 X 13 inch baking dish with parchment paper with a 1-inch overhang on all sides. Spray lightly with baking spray. Combine both flours, oats, wheat germ, chia seeds if using, salt and cinnamon in a medium bowl. Set aside. Combine peanut butter, brown sugar, vegetable oil and egg white in another medium bowl. Beat with a hand mixer until creamy, about 2 minutes. Mix in dry ingredients and beat on low until a wet and sandy mixture that holds together when squeezed is formed. Pour the dough out into the prepared pan and press into an even layer. Bake until golden, 25 to 30 minutes. Let cool completely. Drizzle with the chocolate. Let the chocolate harden and break into 18 two-inch even pieces.
PERFECT ASIAN PEANUT BUTTER STIR-FRY Serves 8
What you need: SALAD: 8 OZ ANGEL THIN SPAGHETTI 1 MEDIUM ZUCCHINI, SPIRALIZED* 2 LARGE CARROTS, PEELED AND JULIENNED 1 RED BELL PEPPER, THINLY SLICED 3 SCALLIONS, SLICED 1 16-OZ BAG SHREDDED PURPLE CABBAGE 1 TBSP CILANTRO 2 CUPS PEANUTS, CHOPPED
What you do:
In a large pot of boiling hot, salted water, cook the noodles until al dente. Drain and rinse briefly with cool water to remove the excess starch and stop the cooking. Transfer to a large serving bowl and add all prepared salad ingredients – except peanut and cilantro. While the pasta cooks, whisk together the vinegar, soy sauce, peanut butter, brown sugar, garlic powder, ginger and cayenne pepper. Pour into a saucepan and cook over medium heat. Stir until brown sugar is dissolved and sauce is smooth, about 5 minutes. Allow sauce to cool, then pour over the noodle mixture and toss to combine. Top with the peanuts and cilantro and toss once more. Serve chilled or at room temperature. *If you don’t have a spiralizer, you can use either a vegetable peeler or large side of grater for zucchini.
DRESSING: 1/4 CUP RED WINE VINEGAR 1/4 CUP SOY SAUCE 1/4 CUP CRUNCHY PEANUT BUTTER 2 TBSP BROWN SUGAR 2 TSP GARLIC POWDER 1/4 TSP GROUND GINGER 1/4 TSP CAYENNE PEPPER
TA C H L I S M A G A Z I N E
TA N YA’S R E C I P E
HEALTHY, LOW CALORIE PEANUT BUTTER CUPS
What you need: 1 cup powdered peanut butter 1 cup water 1/2 cup sugar free dark chocolate chips 1/4 cup almond milk (room temperature)
What you do:
This recipe was adapted with permission from Tanya’s cookbook. NUTRITION BY TANYA 844-TANYA-DIET (826-9234)
Line a mini cupcake pan with mini cupcake liners. Add dark chocolate chips to a microwave safe bowl and microwave for 15 second intervals until fully melted. Gently stir in the almond milk until you have a creamy consistency. Separate the chocolate mixture into two batches. Take the first batch and pour the mixture evenly into the cupcake liners. Place pan in the freezer to solidify for a few minutes. Combine the peanut butter powder and water until you have a creamy peanut butter texture. (The texture will be slightly runnier than regular peanut butter which is fine. This makes it easier to pour into the cupcake liners and it will still solidify once frozen.) Pour the peanut butter into each of the cupcake liners to create another layer on top of the solid chocolate. Return to the freezer for approx. 30 minutes to allow the peanut butter layer to solidify. Last, add a thin layer of melted chocolate to the cupcake liners and return to the freezer until the peanut butter cups are fully frozen. Tanya’s Note: Count each as a snack or a treat. Makes 10-12 peanut butter cups.
JUNE 15, 2018
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Go Nuts for Peanuts Amy Nathans
Peanut has the word “nut” right in its name. With that in mind, we figured we’d bring you some nutty (and not so nutty) facts about this popular American food. The much-loved nosh might have the word “nut” right in the name, but that doesn’t make them nuts. Peanuts are actually legumes! These tasty and popular little legumes grow underground and not on trees like real nuts such as chestnuts, hazelnuts, and acorns, which is why the bracha for peanuts is borei pri ha’adama. As a matter of fact, peanuts grow in a fascinating manner. They start out as an above ground flower, and then, due to its heavy weight, it bends towards the ground. The bud eventually burrows underground, which is where the peanut actually matures. Humble Origins Peanuts originated in South America where they have grown for thousands of years. They played an important role in the diet of the Aztecs and other native Indians in South America and Mexico. The Spanish and Portuguese explorers who found peanuts growing in the New World brought them on their voyages to Africa. They flourished in many African countries and were incorporated into local traditional food cultures. Since they were revered as a sacred food, during the beginning of the slave trade, they traveled aboard African boats coming to North America, which is how they were first introduced to this region. In the 19th century, peanuts experienced a great gain in popularity in the U.S. thanks to the efforts of a number of people. Legend attributes this much-loved food to George Washington Carver, who suggested that farmers plant peanuts to replace their cotton fields that were destroyed by the boll weevil following the Civil War. He also printed a book with more than 300 uses for this legume, but at that point, others had already been refining the peanut-butter-making process. At the end of the 19th century, a physician practicing in St. Louis, Missouri, created a ground up paste made
from peanuts and prescribed this nutritious high protein, low carbohydrate food for his patients. He likely wasn’t the “inventor” of peanut butter either, since peanut paste had probably used by many cultures for centuries. His new discovery though, quickly caught on and became, and still remains, a very popular food. While peanut allergy is one of the most popular food allergies, a recent study reported that early introduction to peanuts dramatically reduces the prevalence of peanut allergies. Some believe, that the low rate of peanut allergies in Israel can be attributed to the popularity of the Bamba snack. But irrespective of its popularity in Israel, peanuts are a favorite in America, too. In fact, in one of those useless calculations, it’s been determined that if one took all the peanut butter that Americans eat in a year, it could coat the floor of the Grand Canyon! Peanut butter is so ubiquitous in the U.S. that there’s a jar of the creamy goodness in 75 percent of the homes in America. While more than a billion pounds are consumed in the U.S., in direct contrast, Europeans don’t like peanut butter at all and consider it an “unpalatable American curiosity.” On average, Europeans only eat around a tablespoon of peanut butter a year!
TA C H L I S M A G A Z I N E
If you’ve seen one, you’ve seen them all? Not quite. There are actually four different types of peanuts! And that’s a fact that two of our former presidents would have known. Thomas Jefferson and Jimmy Carter were both peanut farmers! Carter started earlier in his life; he began selling peanuts on the streets when he was only five years old. Following are some more fun facts about the goober a.k.a. peanut:
JUNE 15, 2018
Food Fun Facts
• Let’s start with some contradictory statistics: Women and children prefer creamy peanut butter, while most men opt for chunky. And people living on the East Coast prefer creamy peanut butter, while those on the West Coast prefer the crunchy style. Unless we have more women on the East Coast, there’s something iffy about this math.
• In the medical world, peanut butter has come in handy in a roundabout way. It’s been shown that individuals diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease may lose the ability to smell peanut butter. The “Peanut Butter Test” may offer an early indication of the disease.
• In the U.S., peanut butter must contain 90% peanuts. Otherwise, it must be called “peanut spread.” The other ingredients in some jars may include oil, sugar or salt.
• By using more pressure than found in earth’s core, scientists at Germany’s Bayerisches Geoinstitut made diamond gemstones from peanut butter. Well, technically, the diamonds are of poor quality and that amount of pressure can make diamonds out of other material as well, but peanut butter seems to be the preferred consistency for this. Although, scientist Dan Frost noted that the hydrogen that’s bonded to the peanut butter’s carbon makes the process messier and that the process is still too slow.
• In 2008 the ingenious product of peanut butter slices, like American cheese slices, hit the shelves. It disappeared shortly after, though, and we do have to wonder what was added to make it firm enough to wrap and non-sticky enough to be easily unpeeled… • This might partly explain why peanut butter in Dutch is called Pindakaas (peanut cheese) and not pindaboter. The real reason is that in the Netherlands, the word butter is only supposed to be used on products that contain actual butter. • Did you know that when making peanut butter, the “heart” of the peanut, that little nub in between the two halves, is taken out because it’s too bitter? The peanut hearts that are collected are put into birdseed. • Peanut butter sandwiches might be kids’ lunches today, but there was a time, back when they were a rarity, that they were reserved for the finest tea rooms in NYC. • Still today, boiled peanuts are considered a delicacy in the peanut growing areas of the South. Freshly harvested peanuts are boiled in a brine until they are of a soft bean-like texture. • Peanut-based paste is also the core ingredient in some life-saving food used to treat severe malnutrition in emergency situations. It’s given to children in developing countries when they need to gain weight quickly. The United Nations has used this peanut paste to help save lives around the world. Peanut butter is now a widely used instrument in the fight against acute malnutrition
• Forget the diamonds! There is a fun science experiment that you can do at home. After being exposed to a blue or violet laser pointer, peanut butter will glow in the dark in the traditional glow-in-the-dark green. Peanuts contain phenols which can absorb light in the ultraviolet spectrum. The “afterglow” is stronger in peanut butter than plain peanuts because of the butter making process that breaks down the components, allowing them to react more freely. For a longer lasting glow, freeze the peanut butter – and just like freezing slows down the ripening of fruits, it slows down the chemical reaction in the peanut butter and allows it to glow longer! • And here’s something for those leftover peanut shells: They can be used to make kindling, fireplace logs, or compost. You know how those spongy Styrofoam “peanuts” are used as packing material? The eco-friendly option is to use real peanut shells, which some use to help out the environment.
Nuggets of Nuttiness • There are six cities in the U.S. named Peanut: Peanut, California; Lower Peanut, Pennsylvania; Upper Peanut, Pennsylvania; Peanut, Pennsylvania; Peanut, Tennessee; and Peanut, West Virginia. • The world’s largest peanut butter and jelly sandwich, made in Grand Saline, Texas, weighed 1,342 pounds. • In 2014, 950,000 jars of peanut butter, worth $2.6 million(!) were dumped in a New Mexico landfill after Costco refused to take the shipment. • There was an art installation in a Dutch museum that consisted of 150 gallons of peanut butter on a floor. It reportedly sold for over €100,000 ($115,000). • For more weirdness, there’s a weird word for a weird fear: Arachibutyrophobia (pronounced A’-ra-kid-bu-ti-ro-pho-bi-a) is the fear of getting peanut butter stuck to the roof of your mouth. • And then there was Astronaut Alan Shepard who brought a single peanut with him to the moon. Lunacy or just nutty? TA C H L I S M A G A Z I N E
Pareidolic Rollick! Home Sweet Home Pareidolia allows us to see faces in the oddest of places. Like a smiling face in our latteâ€™s foam, or a spooky tree trunk that seems to be following our every move.
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Our vanity pipes! -The Kohns, BP
Our plastic tablecloth is concerned about the havdala burn it got. -Etty Blumenberg, Age 6
At TACHLIS we enjoy the enjoyable, and love to share the shareable. And so, we welcome our readers to submit their favorite and funniest pareidolia shots. Why not invite other readers into your pareidolic world? email@example.com
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Neighbor Judy chapter 36
A S IY U M A N D AN AIRPLANE BY CHANNIE GREENBERG & RIVKA GROSS
JUNE 15, 2018
Yehudis, Dina, Tovi and Devorah plan a day camp to occupy neighborhood girls during the Three Weeks. Etty and Rachel join the friends as staff. Also, Yehudis ask Dina to daven for her in Eretz Yisrael.
amp with Etty and Rachel turned out to be okay. In the end, Rachel used her ability to quickly and accurately weigh situations to separate girls who would otherwise have gotten into arguments and to cheer on girls who needed encouragement. Etty, too, used her middos for the good. She used her flair with words to champion campers afraid of reading aloud to the group and to put limits on the girls who would have taken too many treats from the groups’ sharing basket. Besides, Etty’s musical talents and Rachel’s artsy ones got put to good use. Etty taught singing and showed our campers how to make instruments out of oatmeal cartons and round, disposable baking tins. I’m supposing our “symphony” was less inspired than the one of Miriam and the other Bnos Yisrael at the sea, but I’m uncertain that our ancestors had better drums or tambourines. Rachel helped us make dioramas for Rosh Hashanah and stars for our sukkahs. She pointed out, wisely, that it’s never too early to prepare for the Yomim Noraim and that since the school year begins around the same time as these holidays, either girls are limited to what they make in school or they are unable to contribute beauty to their homes and sukkahs. Most importantly, Etty and Rachel listened to Yehudis as much as did Tovi and Devorah. Since Yehudis and I were co-directors of the camp, she and I were their bosses. Not once, except for a small “discussion” on the right way to make s’mores, did either of them object to being our employees or treat either of us with any disrespect. Those classmates made the best kind of teshuva. Adding to my amazing summer was the siyum held to celebrate the finishing of Maseches Megilla by Tatty and by Yehudis’ tatty, Dr. Mr. Barronoff. At their party, the two fathers gave easy-to-understand, meaningful divrei Torah. They spoke about doing mitzvos and serving Hashem in public. They compared reading the Megilla in shul to spreading love for Hashem in other ways. They also talked about loving Hashem by loving all other Jews, including gerim and even baalei teshuva. Their words were welcomed by all of the guests. Mommy and Mrs. Barronoff both cried. Mrs. Barronoff always cries now, so that wasn’t a big surprise, but Mommy doesn’t cry much, so that display of her feelings was a surprise. Also, Mommy and Dr. Mrs. baked all sorts of treats (yet, not one plate of food included pickles as its ingredient except for the relish trays). There was even chocolate mousse complete with a lack of boy-related mess; our brothers were trying to impress our fathers. What’s more, Rabbi and Rebbetzin Orgel and their new twins joined our celebration. They left their other children home with a babysitter. Rabbi Orgel alternated (my new word of the week) between apologizing to Yehudis’ tatty and praising mine. Then he apologized to mine and praised Yehudis’. He was very busy! While observing the principal of our brothers’ school,
my dear neighbor and I smiled at each other – laughing would have been even more disrespectful. The good news and the bad news is the fact that I smiled shows I still have things to work on. Anyway, as I nibbled on Dr. Mrs.’ muffins and enjoyed a portion of Mommy’s fruit salad, I thought about the past school year. It seemed like only days ago that the Barronoffs moved in across the street and that my newest classmate struggled to accept her Hebrew name, “Yehudis,” in place of her English name “Judy.” I remember issues of clothing, of fitting in, and of catching up. I imagine Yehudis remembers my intolerance, lack of understanding, and our related falling-outs. Back then, too, I never imagined: wanting a cat of my own, wanting to become extra careful with my speech, or wanting to discover the good qualities of mean girls. I could never have imagined, either, what it was like to not have a little sister. Yehudis has taught me so much more than math! Pirkei Avos says we’re supposed to learn from everyone. Yehudis is an amazing teacher. I hope we’ll be friends forever. I wonder if I made even a fraction (get the joke?) of as much of an impact on Yehudis. I guess it doesn’t matter. I did my best, fell a few times, and then asked for help getting up when I needed help. I wonder if chessed is a means of saving a life. After all, Rabbi Yospeh said, during one of his drashos, that helping someone become frum is saving that person’s life. I guess it’s not important which category giving help falls into. We’re supposed to do good as part of our service to Hashem. It doesn’t matter if we get credit or not. We should do things l’shma – that’s what Morah Jacobi says. It was Mimi who interrupted my thoughts. During the divrei Torah, Mommy had given her a pen. Mimi had drawn fish pictures on ten napkins. She gave me one and then gave one to Yehudis. I think she gave Drs. Mr. and Mrs. Barronoff one apiece, as well. I don’t know what she did with the other six. As the evening ended, everyone was in good spirits, even Moshe. He let Yehudis give him a super duper hug! Also, when Mimi, who was following Moshe around during cleanup, gave him a fish picture, he not only took it, but also complimented her on its colors. I’ve never seen either Mimi or Moshe smile so big. In all, our tattys’ siyum was a wonderful event which I was thrilled to be part of. After my family helped the Barronoffs clean up, I gave Yehudis giant hugs. I then walked across the street with the other Glicks to our house. It’s the next day and I’m back at the Barronoffs. Yehudis answers the door with her favorite math book in her hand. I still can’t believe she calmed her nerves before the Brachos Bee by solving equations. When we get to her room, I see Leora sunning in her favorite spot. I’ve given up on the hope that Leora and Princess Fuzz-Cuddles will communicate through their windows. I’ve read more books about cats and have concluded, sadly, that when kittens grow up, their parents might recognize, but not care, about them. I’m so glad I’m a human. TA C H L I S M A G A Z I N E
78— Yehudis reminds me, again, how much she would love a baby sister. I smile at her. She then switches subjects. “So, only a few more weeks until your big trip.” “I really wish you could have come with us.” “Mom definitely needs me, though.” “I’m sure. It’s just that I wanted us to be together, you know.” “I know. But don’t worry, you’ll have plenty of time to be here as my friend.” Yehudis smiles a two dimple smile. “Don’t worry, Dina,” she says. “I’ll take good care of Princess Fuzz-Cuddles while you’re in Eretz Yisrael. I know how to feed cats and how to change their litter boxes. I will play with her for an hour or two each day too, so she doesn’t feel lonely. When you return after your trip, for her it’ll be as though you were never gone.” I must have frowned, because Yehudis adds more. Her dimples got bigger, if that were even possible, when she said, “Taking care of princess Fuzz-Cuddles will be a great distraction for me from Mom’s pickle-flavored food.” I smile, too. Days fly. Soon our family and Aunt Yael’s family are at the airport. I share a row on the plane with Mimi, who takes the window seat, and with our little cousin, Tzipora, who is not only the oldest of Aunt Yael’s girls, but also Mimi’s dear friend. We play word games, take naps, eat our kosher airline food, and otherwise pass the many hours it takes to fly from Newark to Tel Aviv. In the row behind us, I hear Yoni learning aloud. I also
hear Pinny, now and then, pretending to be an army fighter pilot. He and Yoni are sitting with Uncle Rafi. Mommy is sitting across the aisle from me with cousins Ruthi and Batya. Tatty is sitting on the other aisle side, in the same row as Mommy and me. His partner is my cousin Leah. Even though tall Tatty looks squished, he sits in the middle so that Leah gets the window and so that she does not have to sit next to a stranger. Leah, like her older cousin, Mimi, has developed an interest in drawing fish pictures. Across the aisle from Uncle Rafi’s row and behind Mommy are Aunt Yael and the twins. My aunt and uncle bought them seats even though they’re not yet two because my aunt and uncle felt that having the twins in their car seats would be much safer for them than having them on my aunt and uncle’s laps. Besides, the girls will need those seats once we are driving around Israel. In any case, little Golda and little Henni nap most of the flight. Aunt Yael’s thus free to spend her travel hours entertaining Mommy with her latest ideas about how we should spend our two weeks in Eretz Yisrael. Aunt Yael never seems to run out of ideas. I’m now beginning to appreciate her enthusiasm. She found our families good prices for hotel rooms and a reliable tour guide. Also, she has notes on places that are good for little kids and on minyanim at the places we will be staying. Soon, I’ll return to the shade under Yehudis’ large tree. I’ll come home a little more grown, I hope. Back in Meadow Wood, I’ll continue to grow, as well, from my friendship with Yehudis. -The End-
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CHALLENGING BRAIN GAMES INCREASE YOUR CREATIVITY AND PROBLEM SOLVING SKILLS. PLAY WELL. PLAY BETTER.
King Queen Rook Bishop Knight Moves to Captures Check Checkmate Castles King’s side Castles Queen’s side Good move Bad move
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Calcudoku: Fill in the grid so that every row and every column contain the digits 1 through 6. Each box must also be calculated according to the total and the equation.
Shaded Shapes: Use the grid references to shade in the boxes and reveal six of the fifteen shapes below. The look at each shape and note that it has three letters assigned to it. Find the six shapes you’ve just colored and from the letters below, discard one letter from each shape to reveal secret answer to: Where peanuts originated from.
SEND IN YOUR BEST GUESSES BY TUESDAY! EACH CORRECT ANSWER ENTERS A FREE RAFFLE FOR A FUN GAME! SEND YOUR ANSWERS TO: BRAINGAMES@THETACHLIS.COM OR FAX TO 877.331.3738 ANSWERS WILL BE PRINTED NEXT WEEK.
WINNER OF OUR MAY DRAWING: NECHEMIA AND SHIMON GROSS BROUGHT TO YOU BY:
BECAUSE LIFE IS MEANT TO BE ENJOYED! JUNE 15, 2018
ANSWERS TO LAST WEEK’S BRAIN GAMES DROP QUOTE:
IF YOU ARE PERSISTENT YOU WILL GET IT; IF YOU AR CONSISTENT YOU WILL KEEP IT.
1. Rg7-g8+ Rc8xg8 2. Qh6-f6+ Rg8-g7 3. Qf6xg7#
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All the boys are talking about the pushke money that went missing and how it's now public knowledge that "Yosef Dov did it." Motty doesn't believe that if more people say it, the story becomes truer. The following is what happened the day before:
SHMIRAS HALASHON HALACHA #87
We arenâ€™t allowed to believe loshon hora, even if we hear it from many people. JUNE 15, 2018
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Repeat. Maybe it’s as simple as changing your water
Try it FREE for 30 days The only thing you have to lose is your tiredness!
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