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LOCAL SNOWBOARDERS DIE!

one calm blue bird day four back-country shredders strapped in at the top of mount bachelor. ross jason brian and jake were on northwest run when the powder was airy and deep. while on their way down, witnesses say, "jason was hitting a 20 foot stepper and when he landed the nose of the board stuck into the snow and he cart wheeled down the mountain. his goggles flew higher than the jump and went 40 feet in the air." another witness says "the crew were laughing so hard they all peed themselves and had to go home." police officials say that they all had rockstar energy drinks in their systems, wich caused the "go big" behavior. it also related to their spontanious urination. later that week they all died. jason, died of a broken neck. ross, died of getting mauled by a tiger (completely irrelevant). brian and jake both died of rockstar, monster, and amp(energy drinks) overdose which resulted in heart failure.

newspaper  

snowboarding mount bachelor

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