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Ice-Cream and Shades, Buckets and Spades If 2010 does not come with a hot, scorcher of a summer than I am officially abandoning all religion. You heard it here first. I’m fed up of cold and overcast afternoons forced to sit indoors, tired of evenings in the pub staring out of the window at a beer garden getting battered with wind and rain, and sick to the back teeth of trying to dance at a music festival in wellies, a foot deep in mud. If there is a god, he should ensure for the next couple of months that all clouds and precipitation are struck from existence, he should make eating and drinking outside during every meal and social gathering a new commandment and he should get me so hot and sweaty I’ll want to dive straight into Bristol harbour to cool off. What with a World Cup on the telly I’ll probably spend all day inside anyway but that’s not the point! We have suffered enough! Bring on the sunshine! Suit Yourself Magazine is an independent Bristol publication, a voice for all those young at heart, those interested in music, fashion, adventure, the arts, their environment and everything in between. A magazine which investigates, uncovers and promotes everything that makes Bristol such a fun, vibrant and altogether amazing place to live! This is our quarterly edition

and so expect articles, in-depth features, interviews, cartoons, illustrations and photos, all in the creation of an altogether fantabulous read which you can dip and in and out of during the three month period. Those of you who still want your monthly fix of SY, log on to the website and read our monthly, online, sister publication ‘SY - On The Sly’ which is chock-a-block with previews and reviews of all sorts of events happening across Bristol and don’t forget to check out our constantly updated blog, all found at: The fabulous sections waiting to enlighten you are: Involve Yourself – think green, act keen Pamper Yourself – think health and beauty Hurt Yourself – think getting active Treat Yourself – think indulgence Enjoy Yourself – think about getting out there Prepare Yourself – think about shakin’ that ass 3

Contents 3/ Ice-Cream and Shades, Buckets and Spades 7/ Summer has Landed! 11/ Stomping The Streets – Ashton Court 16/ Cartoon – Summer Man 20/ RANT! i-pods for i-snobs 23/ Alternative Views of Bristol 32/ SY Creation Station Separate listings can be found under all the separate section header pages. 35/ Involve Yourself 55/ Pamper Yourself 67/ Hurt Yourself 77/ Treat Yourself 95/ Enjoy Yourself 114/ Prepare Yourself For those of you pretending to work, you can also read the magazine online at


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Summer Lovin’ – Having A Blast! Summer, in reality, is very rarely a collection of picture postcard moments - that idealistic dream we develop throughout the winter of our tanned, carefree selves lounging at a bar under the moonlight or running on a sandy beach clad in brightly coloured bikinis, rarely comes to fruition. In reality, our airline will lose our luggage, we will get serious bright red burned skin instead of the Caribbean tan we were going for, our hair will be a victim of humidity instead of the sun-kissed luster we want, and we will spend most of our time waiting around in crowded airports or stations embroiled in other transport-related nightmares getting us to that dream destination. Or we might simply not even go on holiday and the vision will remain just that. I don’t mean to rant or complain – summer is, and has always been, a gem of a season, a natural happiness injection that can keep me going through the grey clouds and rain - my intention is just to point out a contradiction: we all know the hassle and the problems continuously popping up when chasing the dream of that perfect, yet elusive summer.


Rose tinted glasses come on, why, then do we ignore all these potential issues and choose to love summer anyway? What is it that makes these three months so utterly irresistible? If its reality is moreoften less than perfect, the answer is not to be found in what summer is in itself, but rather in what it makes us become ... When the sun comes out, the parks are filled with flowers, trees bloom and people naturally pour outdoors; open-air cafes, terrace restaurants and outdoor events are all busier than chocolate shops on Valentine’s Day... The city wakes up and as if by a gloriously sun filled chain reaction, we find ourselves outside, surrounded by buzzy crowds, all delighting in the longer evenings not being locked up makes us more open and sociable. We meet people, chat, exchange stories, we let the atmosphere of happiness lure us into not working, not being busy, not feeling busy.


Everything will be done in due time. The priority now is to maximise every glorious moment, not to miss the blissful moments. We become transformed into relaxed Mediterranean types (or at least what we imagine relaxed Mediterranean types to be). By tuning down, we become more able to look at and enjoy the world around us: we can appreciate that park, that view, that building that we usually pass by, now illuminated by the shiny rays and our willingness to take a minute to look. And while we’re at it, we’re also hot: we wear less, we like our skin more than we did that milky colour we hid under endless layers during winter, our clothes are more colourful, lighter, flowier. Summer makes us come to terms with our body, allowing it to enjoy lying around in the sun, being warmed up by its rays, being tickled by the grass.

And of course, summer is the holiday season: despite the downfalls, it reminds us of life without work, shoulds, musts, constant anxiety and unchanging routine. We live a kind of alternative life, a window looking out into what life could be like in a perfect world, what we could be, what we can be if, along with superfluous clothing, we get rid of the self-imposed constraints of normal life and are, for a while, purely and blissfully free. Anna Leon Illustration by Laurie Stansfield


Stomping The Streets

Ashton Court 11

Ashton Court Estate: 850 acres of woods, meadows, open grassland, deer parks and horse and bike riding trails not 2 miles from Bristol city centre. Just head west over the Suspension Bridge or walk up through Southville and past UWE Bower Ashton campus and you’ll be surrounded by a wide and seemingly infinite estate that has been keeping Bristolians sane for years. The estate is focused around Ashton Court Mansion, a super posh house that was taken over by Bristol Council in the 1950s and is now rented out for business conferences, parties and weddings, aside from just looking damn regal all year round, but it’s not the house we are concerned with here, it’s the glorious greenery and outstanding, unrivalled open spaces. Such a wide patch of greenery so close to the city is the perfect antidote to the dense, grey hysteria of urban living. Just being able to see Ashton Court from pretty much anywhere in town is enough to sooth your soul but it’s visiting (for free might I


add) that really pops the cherry on top of that fabulous cake. Whether you’re walking, cycling, driving or arriving via balloon, on entering the estate you are confronted with open countryside and suddenly remember the astonishing beauty of nature. Not convinced? Just spend an hour wandering its swirling pathways and taking in the rich views of Bristol – it’ll really take a weigh off your shoulders and you’ll be forgiven for chastising yourself for not starting every day walking around it’s grounds. Thankfully then, with summer now wholly upon us, there are more and more reasons to visit Ashton Court, not least because the city’s very best summer events all take place right here. Ashton Court’s headline summer crowd puller has to be the phenomenal International Balloon Fiesta. Held every August, it attracts crowds of around 150,000 a day; people clambering over each other to watch hundreds and hundreds of beautiful hot air balloons as they elegantly launch skywards - and don’t forget the obligatory Sunday afternoon Red Arrow display! Summer at Ashton Court also sees the International Kite

Festival in September when the skies above the higher fields are transformed into a colourful kaleidoscope of shapes and designs. In between these large events it’s still activities galore. Other highlights including Bristol Shakespeare Festival as they put on some of the Bard’s best works in the open air, and all manner of programmed group walks - be it for storytelling, deer feeding or wildlife watching. All year round activities and events become much more appealing while the sun’s all fiery like the mountain bike trails, the orienteering course or the two pitch-and-putt golf courses.

So see you there! Whether you’re heading over the river to sunbathe, go deer spotting, have a BBQ, climb a tree, play Frisbee, enjoy an air show, launch a balloon, fly a kite, read a book, take an afternoon off, walk the dog or are just getting out of the city, make sure you spend a large portion of your summer afternoons here. You won’t regret it! Photos by Ian Bradley

If all this sounds a bit exhausting though, remember it doesn’t have to be all hustle and bustle over in Ashton Court. There are numerous woodlands and meadows you can experience in majestic silence and no matter when you go, you’ll always be able to find a quiet, shady spot under a tree to sprawl out on the grass, read your new book or catch forty winks.


SY SY Blog Blog Suit Yourself Magazine’s constantly updated blog, the only place to find every single article from Suit Yourself Magazine, SY On The Sly plus amazing competitions, extra extended editorial, great images, photos and much, much more – literally everything you would ever need to know about Bristol! Log on now and get browsing! www.suityourselfmagazine


SY On The Sly is our sister publication, sharing exactly the same ideals as Suit Yourself Magazine but it’s a monthly, online mag, chock-a-block with previews and reviews of all the amazing events constantly going on in Bristol. There’s no better place to catch up on every thing you missed of Bristol’s best gigs, art, clubs, stage and cinema from a month gone by and at the same time get excited about everything that’s coming up, along with a smattering of Suit Yourself Magazine’s much loved articles and long time favourites like Auntie Harper and Mystic Ginger’s horoscopes. Log on to now to read this month’s SY On The Sly.

RANT! i-pods for i-snobs The ipod; that quintessential style icon that seems to be omnipresent amongst the street walking masses. Whatever did we do before it came along? How did people manage from day to day without their personal playlist being delivered directly to their brain via their ear canals stuffed with little white earphones? I mean, frankly, the thought of having to be in a public space without being plugged in to this slim status symbol is unthinkable… Really, what’s wrong with acknowledging the existence of other people from time to time? Is it necessary to completely block out everything and everyone around you as you stride your way purposefully through life? Hey, I’m sure the music in your playlist is much too cool for me to have heard of, and probably demands your constant attention in order for you to keep up to date with the absolute latest in cutting edge coolness. If only you could publicly display the actual content of your listening obsession in order for the whole world to know how exclusively cool you are.


Don’t get me wrong, I love music as much as anyone, I really do. I love discovering new things and becoming totally obsessed with them, but that doesn’t mean I plug myself into an ipod and go out of co-existence with the rest of the world. A bit of human interaction every now and then does you good. If you’ve got your ear-plugs in, you’re saying “GO AWAY!” to everyone else around. The worst thing is when you don’t realise someone is ‘ipoding’, and after several sentences of rather one-sided conversation, the person takes one earpiece out and says ‘What’s that mate?’ - it’s bloody rude is what it is. Just take ‘em out now and then. You’ll be OK, the world won’t stop turning. Who knows, you might even end having a conversation. Gustave Savy


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Suit Yourself Magazine Creation Station We all know how much you lovely people of Bristol like to draw, doodle and design, sketch, scribble and squiggle and so here’s your chance! The page opposite is your official, designated creation station for you to illustrate and imagine to your heart’s content. It’s literally a blank canvas; perhaps create a T-shirt design? Or design a front cover for the magazine? Maybe sketch the faces and places of Bristol? Anything goes. If you’re proud of your creation then send it over to us at SY Towers and the best doodles every month will get showcased on our website for the world to see! If we really like it we could even use your design as a magazine front cover or put it on a T-shirt! You lucky people might even receive the odd prize back to say thanks!

It’s an unrestricted, organic competition and we’re completely open to anything and everything you’ve got. Let’s see what you’re made of Bristol! Post any designs along with your name and contact details to: Creation Station, Suit Yourself Magazine, 70 Falmouth Road, Bishopston, Bristol, BS7 8PX

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Involve Yourself Information and musings on the important things in life: The environment, local and community issues, social responsibility, organic farming and charities. To advertise in this section at a reduced rate please contact

Contents/ 36/ The Cost of Convenience 41/ What Does The Election Mean For Bristol? 45/ Drug Use In Bristol 49/ Who Says The Independent Record Shop Is Dead?


Supermarkets: The Cost of Convenience On a basic level, you can buy pretty much all you need in Brislington. Along Sandy Hill you’ll find a decent butcher, convenience stores, a café and close by some handy corner shops, one of which I use for milk, bread and toilet paper on a regular basis. In fact, if I didn’t ‘want’ to shop in the nearby Tesco or Sainsbury’s, I could happily avoid them altogether. So why do I find myself once weekly psyching up for a supermarket mission when I could make use of neighbourhood stores and help my local economy? A major issue is simply one of cost. If I purchased life’s necessities locally, my average bill would easily rise by 20%. They’re not much for special offers are they, the locals? Although my friendly corner shop does let me off the odd 10p if I ‘promise to back it back next time’. And of course, it’s always an almighty pain the ass, shop-surfing. A bag of mince from Sandy Park Butchers, nicotine patches from Lloyds Pharmacy, beans from

Costcutter, stamps from the post office and…well, you’d have to be Dr. Who, or eighty, to have that much spare time. On the other hand, local shops do offer a mercenary form of convenience, if you can handle the mark-up and third-world lack of choice. Need a pair of rubber gloves in a hurry? You can be home in five minutes before the dishwater gets cold. But the reality is, if I need an entire weeks’ shopping, the only practical solution is to hop in the motor and raid Sainsbury’s (forget Tesco, the traffic up the A4 Brislington Hill is a waking nightmare). However, ask me if I’d appreciate a hulking supermarket Right On My Doorstep and I’d tell you to jump in a lake. The traffic! The people! The ‘sight’ of the monstrosity – even if it had a mellow faux-church steeple I would not be a happy citizen. Cathedrals of avarice are 37


being erected in every available space, reflecting the overconsumption, greed and rampant capitalism we all casually ignore – until it happens in our own back yard. If we don’t take action soon, they’ll be converting our letterboxes into cash-points and persuading households to ‘deal’ out of brand-sponsored kitchen windows; ‘Over ‘ere mate. Got some pukka male grooming products in today. Sniff some of this - I’ll give you double points!’ So, pity the irate residents of Stokes Croft, in a stew over Tescos’ next planned outlet; a forced penetration through the back door of Jester’s old comedy club. “Stop Tesco: Every Little Hurts”, yelped the protesters’ banner. While lamppost climbing, placard waving and squatting on the roof of a defunct comedy club isn’t where I’d normally invest free time, if Tesco plotted the invasion of vacant premises near me, I’d buy one of their discounted foldaway chairs and campaign as vigorously as possible, from a comfortably seated position. This, after all would be the sixth Tesco within a miles’ radius of Cheltenham Road and a thorn in the side of Stokes Croft’s put upon community. We all know the downside to this form of corporate domination. A story repeated all over Britain – as local

business winds down, so the vibrancy and originality is sucked from smaller communities. And ironically, not every shopper lives within easy reach of a supermarket. Consider the elderly, with no car or internet, whose shopping budgets are too small for home delivery services. Furthermore, consider the loss of exchanging simple, everyday pleasantries with local traders - while more often we endure the mumbled salutations of faceless till ‘operatives’. Should supermarkets stop playing Monopoly with established traders in our city? A resounding YES. But the only way to show that we, the consumer, mean business is to offer supplementary business to the very shops we want to remain open. So the next time you need a six pack of beer, or wine for the ladies, think of the little shop on the corner and spend your cash there, because you’ll miss it when it’s gone. Paul Lever Photos by Jonathan Taphouse SUPPORT YOUR LOCAL SHOPS - VOTE WITH YOUR MONEY, IT IS THE ONLY ANSWER 39


April 23rd 2010: The second TV General Election Debate With the faces of the 3 main party leaders projected on the Arnolfini, police divers searching for possible bombs in the River Avon, standstill traffic and Apprentice-style filming of shiny/ stylish/stunning Bristol, the election buzz was impossible to miss. Cameron, Clegg and Brown? It was anyone’s game. May 6th 2010: Election Day The results displayed the city of Bristol surrounded by blue, with exceptions being the Bristol West constituency who resoundingly voted again for Liberal Democrat representation and both Bristol East and Bristol South who voted to remain Labour. The neighbouring constituencies all voted Conservative, notably with fresh wins in Bristol North West and Kingswood. Britain as a whole voted, Conservative 36.1%, Labour 29%, Liberal Democrats 23% and Other 11.9%. May 7th until May 10th 2010: Uncertainty Constant speculation and chat as no party had a majority. Who should govern? May 11th 2010: Decision Time David Cameron and Nick Clegg were apparently ‘surprised’ by how much they liked each other when they entered talks on a coalition government. Ultimately they agreed to become longtime ‘chums’ as Cameron took the post of Prime Minister and Clegg as his deputy. And so as the right and the lefty middlish join forces, the UK wonders whether a coalition government will

make for a fair leadership, or will nothing get done as legislation gets watered down and debating takes too long because the two sides continuously squabble over conflicting ideals? In the 19th century, the Liberal Democrats and Conservatives were the two warring parties, Labour didn’t exist until 1900. Formed officially in 1859, with their foundations in social democracy and liberalism, many of the Liberal Democrat supporters were middle class radical thinkers. The 19th century viewed the Liberal Democrats and the Conservatives, who formed in the 1600s as polar opposites, with the idea of a coalition between the two parties completely hideous to all. The differences between William Gladstone’s Liberals and Benjamin Disraeli’s Conservatives were fierce, as was the personal animosity between the two men. Now, 130 years later, Clegg has moved in next to Cameron. Is it possible that the Liberals and the Conservatives can merge some of their values to become both modern and traditionalist? Can they impose ‘change’? When Tony Blair became Prime Minister he was a young, enthusiastic man, like Cameron, boasting fairness and educational prosperity. Ultimately he became presidential and grandstanding with terror laws and wars whilst his cabinet fell apart. It feels that hope is the wrong word for Cameron and Clegg. They have a lot to do to repair and build Britain; there is a collective holding of breath as the nation waits for the next chapter.

When Gordon Brown left number 10, he instantly appeared more radiant and Mr Cameron moved in to the famous Tardis (although both men of course, actually resided at number 11), as Blair called it, shortly after. Cameron’s “smug” look (so reported on in the media) during his campaign has overnight been usurped by pictures of a furrowed and freshly burdened brow, the pressure of Britain’s financial, health, social and education problems placed immediately upon the shoulders of our new PM.

May 12th 2010: The Future Has Britain elected someone ‘remarkable’? I guess we’ll have to wait and see. You would hope that although the Lib Dems only make up a small part of the cabinet in this coalition government, their presence alone will serve to round off the sharper, more right wing edges of the Conservatives and mean that new legislation and big decisions will be discussed more thoroughly with a wider range of voices and opinions being heard before being made into law.

The youngest Prime Minister since 1812, his privileged background continuously highlighted as a negative factor and contradictory to his modern Tory proclamations. Hadn’t he just romped about being rich before all this Conservative leadership business – Eton, Oxford, links to Royalty? – standard. A ruddy great chap... Probably. And although he appears reasonably open (compared to Brown, certainly), Cameron is actually quite mysterious - talking about his family and telling jokes does not necessarily mean honest.

As Dave and Nick lead Britain, they are up against an already negative public. It would be fantastic if they proved a great partnership, but politics is a dirty, dirty world and trust is difficult to attain from a wounded and wary population.

Who is the real David Cameron? In June 1988 it is reported that Conservative Central Office received a telephone call from Buckingham Palace on the morning of his interview. The unnamed male said: “I understand you are to see David Cameron. I’ve tried everything I can to dissuade him from wasting his time on politics but I have failed. I am ringing to tell you that you are about to meet a truly remarkable young man.”

The only thing that’s for certain after all this is that the country is much more engaged with its government and understands the election process better, largely thanks to the prime-time TV debates, interviews with the leaders and election coverage that was aimed at younger voters. It’s cool to be informed now, and saying you don’t care or aren’t going to vote as your way of protest doesn’t cut the mustard. Helen Martin Illustration by James Seymour


Drug Use In Bristol With two universities and a massive student population, Bristol has been named one of the coolest cities in the country. People like Banksy have made Bristol’s street art infamous (did anyone manage to miss the unfeasibly massive queue outside the museum during his exhibition?) and areas like Stokes Croft have worked tirelessly to drag themselves from ‘rough and run down’ to become key to Bristol’s cultural heart, but like any other large city, Bristol has a “drug problem”. What’s arguably different here is that many of Bristol’s inhabitants don’t consider it a “problem”. The people who enjoy the city’s seedy affair with drug use are as varied in their demographic as the unfeasibly large range of drugs on offer; the selection is huge and available in most areas of Bristol. This may well be the case in many cities but the thing that sets Bristol apart is the commonality of drug use, is the scene simply part of Bristol’s character? Drugs usually link with music, fashion, art and culture so which came first, the street art and the music or the drug use? I spoke to a few people involved in the scene (whose

names, for obvious reasons, have been changed here) about Bristol’s apparent love affair with drugs. After becoming homeless aged 12, Mark began stealing drugs to sell on and he’s been a dealer ever since. He explained; ‘I’d break into houses and take drugs and money. I wouldn’t take goods because you can get into trouble with the police. You can’t phone up the police and say - oh sorry officer, but someone has taken my drugs so it was just safer.’ Mark hasn’t taken drugs himself for around 5 years but still sells; ‘I’ve got lawyers that come to me three times a day and still hold down a job. I don’t know what it is about Bristol but everyone is just so laid back about it. People look down on the crack and smack but weed, coke and pills - everyone is doing it. It’s just looked at like drinking in the pub really, and I personally don’t see there’s much difference.’ Mark used to deal in London and believes dealing in Bristol isn’t so rough; ‘I lived in London 45

for a couple of years and people are much more likely to beat you up there to score…I know less people here that don’t take drugs than do, but that might just be because of the work I’m in!’ Joe, a dealer from Sheffield, comes to Bristol for nights out; ‘There’s a lot more drugs here and they’re easier to get hold of. In Sheffield, if you don’t know those sorts of people, you’ll struggle. Down here you can ask anybody on a night out and chances are you can get what you want. There seem to be a lot more young people and students into drugs in Bristol. The Sheffield scene is more isolated…in Bristol it’s everywhere.’ Mark also said; ‘People kick off on coke, and skag and crack bring no end of problems. Regeneration of places like St Pauls and Stokes Croft will just spread the problem further, and it’s not like drug use is only confined to deprived areas anyway, it’s just what drug people take that differs. St Pauls for example is a place where you’d sell more crack or heroin but I sell there because people need to buy the coke so they can turn it into crack, and that’ll mix now that the richer people are coming.’ 46

Katy a student in Bristol does not see drugs as an issue “People use recreational drugs all over the country, it does seem more open here, and lots more accessible� Rightly or wrongly, it seems Bristol has a more tolerant attitude to drug use, or at least to some drug use, than other cities, despite the problems it brings. So maybe the drug scene here is constantly changing, as is the music, art and culture. What drugs different people take and why is also obviously inextricably linked to affluence and area, and effected by social problems and forces. But for the time being at least, Bristol still seems set on getting high and enjoying the ride. Natalie Burns



TheIndependent Independent‘Rollercoaster’ ‘Rollercoaster’ The RecordStore Store Record ‘My idea is that there is music all around us; the world is full of it, and you simply take as much as you can.’ One might consider Edward Elgar’s quote some sort of prophecy. When you look at the way in which music is consumed these days it seems Elgar’s ethos is literally being played out. There is no denying the affect modern technology has had upon independent music stores, with the internet being (generally) free, easy and more convenient. Some might argue the progress has been liberating, others, diminishing, with hundreds of independent record stores being buried across the world in the past twenty years. However, despite this, it seems that in 2010 there is a light at the end of that long, dark cyber-mad tunnel - a light which is shining most successfully in Bristol: In the last year we have seen Head in the Galleries revamp itself from the corporate juggernaut of Virgin/Zavvi into an independent record store, which lies in irony considering the current status of Fopp - the indie turned HMV - who continue to successfully trade under an independent agenda on Park Street. Bristol has also seen the continuing trade of smaller and much more traditional shops

such as Plastic Wax, Rooted Records and The Beat Goes On (that tiny record store behind Whiteladies everybody seems to forget about) as well as it being the home to the independent record store of the year, Rise. The general consensus being indie is cool, besides, a record shop is a much more appropriate church for music than a laptop. Located at the top of Park Street on the Triangle, Rise has shown us all how the independent record shop should be done, most notably paving the way for a series of in-store events like live gigs (in the past few months they’ve had Laura Marling, Pretty Things, Mumford and Suns and Frightened Rabbit play), book signings and talks. The Rise team is dedicated to creating a friendly atmosphere where music can once again be a social excursion, reminding us all how the internet can be such a solitary and impersonal experience. Asking someone who has a similar taste in music what they would recommend is a much more accurate way of making sense of your free time, and hey, who knows what kind of babies you might have together? 49


Another important reason to buy your music from an independent record store is the marriage between music and artwork; two forms of creativity dealing with similar issues in different mediums. Album artwork, which is aesthetically pleasing, can draw your hands to your wallet before you’ve even heard any of the music which rests inside it. To massacre a record shop would be to slay each artistic hand which has scribbled or clicked or crafted a beautiful square onto the front of a CD case. Record shops like Head and Rise have started running gigs, great gigs with top class bands and phenominal musicians, they are dedicated to creating a friendly atmosphere where music can once again be a social excursion, reminding us all how the internet can be such a solitary and impersonal experience. Asking someone who has a similar taste in music what they would recommend is a much more accurate way of making sense of your free time, and hey, who knows what kind of babies you might have together? Kayleigh Cassidy


Keep Your Wheels Is your favourite mode of transport a scooter, moped or motorbike? If so, could make you £100 better off this time next year. How come? Well, is one of those rare websites which actually gives you money – no joke! Imagine receiving a lovely cheque and what you could spend that cash on. How does it work? It’s so easy. Simply, register your name and details at to become a member. After that there are five simple steps to getting your cash;

Step1: Prove your roadworthiness – i.e. post, email, or photo message your paperwork to prove your legal. £20 credit.

Step2: Complete all 12 monthly quizzes – don’t worry even we got these right! £20 credit.

Step3: Get extra training – by booking a free ‘One to One’ ride-out or by completing an advanced riding course and/or full licence. £20 credit.

Step4: Show us your skills on the track – attend a free ‘Go-Karting’ session held during the year. £20 credit.

Step 5: Keep a clean licence for a 12 month period. £20 credit.

Don’t worry if you intend to go on to learn to drive a car, you can still take part so long as you’re aged 16-24 and live in Bristol, Bath & NE Somerset, South Glos or North Somerset. Numbers are limited so sign-up quick.

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The planting event on Wednesday 13th February 2008. If you would like to volunteer to help on the day, then please contact Emma at emma.burley@ or 020 7820 4427

Bio Power

Carbon Calculators

01286 830312 Bio power fuel made from renewal materials used instead of fossil fuels.

01823 430852 Check your carbon output and take action to offset it.

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Pamper Yourself In this section with deal with fashion, styling, beauty, trends and glorious ways to make the very best of yourself. We introduce a new regular contributor, the uber glamourous Gill Cockwell, head of a Bristol born house of couture Gilly Woo. Fabulous Gill joins Annette and Charley making this a formidable team! To advertise in this section at a reduced rate please contact

Contents/ Contents/ 56/ Bristol’s got style 60/ Introducing Miss Woo - We adore her! 63/ One lustful summer, guide to the best fragrances

Bristol Street Fashion

Emma Bergamin Davys, 22 Shop: Beyond Retro (London) Style: Ever changing

Bex Furno, 24 Shop: Urban Outfitters Style: 50’s Eclectic

Jenni Bailey, 24 Shop: Topshop Style: Charity shop meets 80s vintage 56

By Lara Angol

Nick, 25 Shop: Reiss Style: A contrast between smart and casual

Loren, 21 Shop: Mainly vintage stores or things I make myself Style: Occasional. It changes every day!

Rich, 23 Shop: Urban Outfitters Style: Relaxed


My name is Gilly and I’m a designer, dressmaker and stylist based in Bristol in the UK. I design and make bespoke finery: bridal gowns, occasion wear and corsets, I style photo shoots, fashion shows, performers and individuals and I party pretty hard too. I’m 30, I’m single and I live with a gay man, a papier mache flamingo and a lot of hats in a little flat in Cotham. I decided to write, to offer impartial honest and realistic advice on style and beauty that comes from years of experience working with women of every age, shape and size and a deep seated, in built passion for making women feel beautiful, feminine, stylish and (above all) confident.


Not from a load of celebrity endorsements and beauty industry back handers often designed to hard sell you unnecessary products by making you feel inadequate. I deal with self depreciating, body dismorphic women every day and it makes me so sad that they can’t see the beauty in themselves that is so obvious to me. When I go out dressed up I get as many compliments from women about the way I look as I do from men, on one occasion, in a ladies powder room, I had an actual queue of women asking me where my outfit was from and complimenting me

on my look, it took me 20 minutes to get out of the loo!... my date thought I’d climbed out the window ;-) One of these women became a client, I told her her correct bra size, (2 cup sizes bigger that the one she was wearing) made her a corset (a welcome addition to any wardrobe and the only comfortable strapless garment she had ever owned) and altered some of her work suits so that they fitted her properly and drew attention to her tiny waist. I made an empire line dress which was entirely the wrong shape for her and far to small around her bust) into a pretty summer skirt and found a beautiful piece of silk to make a matching camisole (that fitted her bust perfectly.) Most of these jobs were small and inexpensive but that woman told me I’d changed her life.

People asked her if she’d lost weight or been on holiday and complimented her on how well she looked, her posture improved with her confidence and she told me that she was genuinely happier. I’m not a model, I’m not unusually pretty, I’m an average size 12, I’m not rich or famous, (I’m not getting any younger!) there is nothing much spectacular about me at all, except that I know how to dress, I’m not afraid to stand out in a crowd, I know about underwear and structure and cut and fit and how to flatter my figure, I know how to apply good make up, I’m lucky enough to call my hairdresser my best friend and I’m on first name terms with my shoe repair guy. It’s as simple as that girls, it just takes a little knowledge and a little practise and it could just change your life.... More from Gill… next issue

By learning how to dress her figure she began to love it for the first time.


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Training for People and Business

One Lustful Summer As the sun decides to debut in an English summer, the city sheds it’s stale and pessimistic cocoon of winter coats and American apparel layers to emerge in true English fashion, practically naked to the sun. The streets are suddenly bustling with a blend of tropical prints and pink sunburnt skin. Crinkled sun hats emerge from dusty cupboards and perch on fresh blue rinses as creased mahogany cleavages clash with ‘on trend’ bright colours. Children dance, bare bummed on the hot stone and cool in the city fountain while grumpy mothers bathe in the much-anticipated heat, shaking their heads at the exposed toned stomachs of passers by.

As the summer temperatures rise, libidos swell, encouraging hot young bodies to fuse together in pandemic fashion. The city’s park is thriving with lush green as the clichéd, yet never tiresome, smell of freshly cut grass fills the air. Couples are engaged in a haze of lust, banishing singletons to the benches with tangled limbs only parting to wet their lips. With this transition comes the need to drag yourself out from the depths of spicy and defensive winter fragrances and wake up to the crisp and zesty notes that sing for summer, making us want to stick two fingers up to conformity, to get close and do crazy things. These are the fragrances that although fickle, will be our long lasting memories of this short-lived, fancy-free season.


Chance eau tendre Chanel;

This third generation fragrance is a toast to summer lovers and old romantics. Top notes of lemon and grapefruit remind us of hurried first kisses at the school gates before mum sees, and bursts of butterflies from holding the hand with the boy full of promise and excitement. Jasmin and hyacinth, will take you back to the feeling of the sweet juices of freshly cut grass between your toes as you ran barefoot, your heart racing intoxicated by feelings of first love. This innocent almost virginal fragrance has the freshness of youth with zesty top notes and bold base notes of Iris and Amber remind us to be brave and take a chance.


This fragrance is the ultimate summer pick-me-up, fresh zesty top notes of green apple, lemon and grapefruit evoke memories of poolside spritzers while rosemary and magnolia take you back to barbecues on the beach, a woody base of coriander and driftwood has you in the warm summer sunset with the sand between your toes counting the shells you have collected from the day.


The patisserie collection by Marc Jacobs;

Marc Jacob proves three is certainly not a crowd when it comes to his new splash collection. Inspired by oh so pretty macaroons with their light and sweet taste and alluring appearance, these fragrances leave you all wide eyed.Which one will you choose?


A city cafĂŠ, a mid afternoon coffee with one too many sugars that would make your mother tutt with a sweet side of biscotti biscuit handled thoughtfully bite for bite. Just like those sweet moments this fragrance is to be savoured as each delectable note unfolds one by one starting off with the zingy and juicy notes of bergamot and orange blossom with a delicious side of pistachio and iris leaving you with a dessert of creamy vanilla and musk. A perfect scent from day to night, bound to create lasting memories of the summer season.

Le Paradis de Nina by Nina Ricci;

The first apple, pretty Nina evokes such sweet memories for me that it is almost impossible not to love this fragrance. It was summer and my first glimpse of true love, this limited edition fragrance has the original notes of caramelised candy apple and gardenia but this time it is paired with heliotrope and orange blossom that leave me intoxicated in those sweet moments once again. Le paradis de Nina takes you into its magical story with zesty citrus scents of orange and mandarin and leaves you with the sweetest taste of sandalwood and vanilla.


This is the most romantic of the collection depicting a peaceful Mediterranean evening on a candle-lit patio with top notes of mandarin blossoms, lemon chiffon and bergamot. A soft and peaceful scent, which lulls you into the calm of summer evenings with rhubarb and violet leaving you with a sweet reminder of amber and vanilla.

story of the season Summer fragrance really tells the in every bottle. , n hidde notes istic optim the with s‌. open er chapt new Summer‌.a C.G.Brunskill


Beautiful People Bishopston Trading Company

0117 9245598 Clothes designed in Bristol. Supporting K V Kuppam village in S India.


Naff Clothing

0117 9737458 13 Cotham Road Fabulous retro shop with added fancy dress

0117 9420818 Gloucester Rd. Natural, organic and fair trade products in family owned shop.

Billie Jean Clothing

Fushia Hairdressers


Beauty Queen Cosmetics


0117 9426586 Cotham Rd south, Kingsdown. 25% discount for students and nurses. Great prices, wonderful service. 0117 9523322 229 - 231 Stapleton Road Whole and retail specialising in afro and euro cosmetics. Open every day.

0117 9445353 208 Cheltenham Road Colourful range of retro clothes. High quality clothes. 0117 9249959 A massive collection of beads from around the world. We run classes also, just give us a call. 0117 9428200 224 Cheltenham Rd Bristol’s most famous Gert famous T-Shirts.

Repsyco: Vintage and Retro

85 Gloucester Road. Clothes, Accessories, Furniture and Kitsch. To submit information for this section please email to:

Hurt Yourself Information and musings on the active things in life: Sport and adventure. To advertise in this section at a reduced rate please contact

Contents/ Contents/

68/ Summer Surf’s Up! 72/ Bowling in Bristol 74/ Base Jumping!

Summer Surfing So, the summer’s finally here, bringing with it the promise of longer days and warmer temperatures (well, if we’re lucky). For a few clinically obsessed, this means only one thing – surf! At least, slightly more tolerable surf. The weekly commute to the coast becomes a possibility, or just less traumatic if you’re one of the dedicated who brave the elements during the dark winter months. Goodbye to freezing skulls and long drives home with feet that can’t feel anything other then the searing pain of denied blood circulation attempting to reinstate itself. Farewell to embarrassing genitally reduced (for us boys anyway) naked wetsuit dances in front of sparse car park audiences of dog walkers and elderly ramblers. Good riddance to your carefully calculated ‘optimum spot’ being a huge windy mess, akin to the inside of a washing-machine on the setting marked ‘vigorous orgasm’. Leaving at the crack of dawn, bleary eyed and shivering, to spend your day battling through the winter weather to arrive at a cold windy car park in North Devon, wrestling into a cold clammy wetsuit (I know you’re supposed to hang them to dry but somehow they always end up left damp in a bag) and facing 68

the blown out massive swell is character building. Especially when after the first duck dive you realise that your suit has yet another new hole as the icy water rushes in over your back, almost paralysing you with cold, and what looked like 4’ chop from the beach is in fact 6-8’ storm swell. Sometimes though, you can score perfect winter waves, after all, it’s the time when the biggest swells hump themselves against our shores, it’s still pretty hard work. Ah yes, summer. The long warm days allow a sneaky session after work or even before, if you’re one of the more clinically insane (driving for an hour and a half each way for a half hour session, back at the office by 9:30am? Not recommended). The joy of the summer wetsuit, allowing enough movement of body and limbs to enable bending over to hide your keys in the wheel arch of the car without incurring a hernia or cracked rib. Your bare feet gripping the wax on your deck, the golden glow as the setting sun refracts through the roof of your fifteenth barrel of the day, bathing you with incandescent rays of every colour imaginable while your two bros - the only other people in the line-up - whoop wildly in the distance……


“OI, F**KING WATCH WHERE YOU’RE GOING GROCKLE!” shouts a tanned teenager on a 5’4” fishtail! Now I remember. The reality of summer surfing; overcrowded waves, angry people, traffic jams and extortionate car park fees (if you can find a space!). Even the, once little known, secret spots all seem to be a battleground these days. Despite this, one classic summer session can stay with you for the rest of your life. Even one wave that peels perfectly from exactly the right spot, as if mother nature herself singled you out for it, a gift from the ancient sea God for you to charge down with that magical acceleration that comes from nowhere. Weightless on the take-off, a carving bottom-turn with your rail buried, transferring all that speed into a new direction, upwards towards the lip, smack, spray flies as you hit it, then a little cutback to the pocket, a stall, a slight hand drag on the face as the lip curls over your ducked head and you hang for a second in the tube. Then a slight weight transference from the back foot to the front, you hit the accelerator and boom, you fly out onto the shoulder to see an opening wall of blue, an empty canvas for you to paint your liquid expression on.


There’s one out there waiting for you, and if you find it, all your dedication, the long drives, the angry girlfriend, the hours spent studying weather systems, will be paid back in full, with just enough extra to keep you looking for the next one. And remember, if a ‘local’ gives you jip in the line-up, just remember they probably lived in Yeovil for their entire life until last year. Gustave Savy Photos by Daniel Lilley




for it! Spring into ac tivit y with everyone ac tive!



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5 days a



YLVLWXVWRGD\DQGPHHWW KHDFWL YLW\H[ SHUWV Bishopsworth Swimming Pool 0117 903 1600 Bristol South Swimming Pool 0117 903 1618 Easton Leisure Centre 0117 955 8840

Henbury Leisure Centre 0117 353 2555 Horfield Leisure Centre 0117 903 1643 Jubilee Swimming Pool 0117 903 1607

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Kingsdown Sports Centre 0117 903 1633 St Pauls Community Sports Academy 0117 377 3405 EOA1676

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Bowlerama Americana I’m not someone who takes the time to go bowling all that regularly but last Wednesday, myself and a group of friends decided to do something a little different and an evening throwing balls at a bunch of pins just about fitted the bill! After negotiating the traffic with constant shouting at the driver for choice of route and much complaining on my behalf about needing a wee, we finally reached our destination: Bristol’s Hollywood Bowl in Avonmeads. Now as I have previously stated, I don’t bowl all that often. It’s usually something I associate with children’s birthday parties along with trips to Lazar Quest and those funny warehouses filled with ball pools, cushioned walls and Death Slides, but I think that Hollywood Bowl is one of Bristol’s most fun looking venues. Adorned with cowboy paraphernalia and some massive glow-in-the-dark bowling pins separating each lane, I was suitably amused. It was one of those wonderfully British American imitation situations which rather cheesily looked the part but wasn’t quite whole-heartedly committed; like the staff were all wearing funny straw cowboy hats and although they were very helpful in setting up our lane and the score-board, there’s nothing quite like a cowboy with a thick Westcountry twang. It’s not


quite the Wild West but it’s a sterling effort! As is natural for a group of twenty-somethings, our first port of call once we were inside was the bar (directly after finding the toilet, of course). Our travel anguish repaired with some very reasonably priced cider, we made our way over to the nice people in charge of those famous shoes. Footwear exchanged so we all were all looking suitably ridiculous, time was allocated for the inevitable silly night out photos before we all headed for our lane and got our game faces on. A key component (apparently) is choosing the right ball to bowl. They say a comfortable weight is the most important thing but I think just as important is selecting a lucky colour! I quickly rediscovered why I hadn’t bothered to take up bowling professionally however: Despite an initial spree of beginner’s luck, it all rather quickly went downhill. Worse was my friend who embarrassingly had to ask for the barriers to be put up half way through the first game. While some of the boys got a tad too competitive, the rest of us focused on exploring bizarre bowling techniques with particular favourites being the backwards bowl, the double header and the eye’s closed lob. Much merriment ensued and it turned out to be a rather fun event. All in all, our trip to the Hollywood Bowl was a wonderful way to get everyone together for a spot of good, clean, cider-fuelled fun! Next time you’re at a loose end, perhaps round up the gang, flex your bowling arm and get ready to strike it lucky! YEEEEHAAAAAWWWW! Lisa Bartlett Illustration by Laurie Stansfield


Blood Pumping BASE Jumping BASE jumpers don’t really like using a parachute; they would rather be a squirrel and meander down to earth with webbed limbs. Watching the skin-tight suited beings zoom down to earth in real time really makes you think that the gutsy bungee jump you did a few years back was in fact for kittens - a petal, floating its way to the floor. These thrill seekers jump from mountains, bridges and skyscrapers without a hint of a rope. They’re the ones that justify that ‘super rad’, adventure extreme soundtrack while you are on Cliff Richard’s tour bus. Damn it, they’re crazy, dangerous and irreverent and just too cool! But let it be said: BASE JUMPING IS A PERILOUS SPORT! March 29th 2010 saw a man cause havoc on the roads of Bristol as he BASE jumped from Clifton Suspension Bridge. Dressed all in black, he leapt from the monument, plummeted the 70-odd metres and opened his parachute at the last second, landing on the Portway road in one piece. He defied the by-law passed in 1953 making it illegal to jump from the bridge and was condemned by the emergency services. Many people had never heard of BASE jumping and thought the man had wanted to die but his stunt has got tongues wagging across Bristol.


BASE is an acronym that stands for the four categories of objects from which one can jump: building, antenna, span and earth. Although they share certain similarities, there are technical differences between BASE jumping and skydiving. BASE jumps are generally made from much lower altitudes and in close proximity to the platform. BASE jumpers also generally have a lower airspeed than a skydiver throughout the jump because a BASE jump starts with zero airspeed and, due to the limited altitude, a BASE jumper very seldom approaches the terminal velocity of a skydiver. Experienced skydivers are recommended to deploy their parachute no lower than 2,000 feet (610 m). At that time, if they have already been in free-fall for at least 1,000 feet (305 m), the diver is travelling 120 miles per hour and is 11 seconds from the ground. Most BASE jumps launch from less than 2,000 feet that’s 610m!! BASE jumpers use specially designed harnesses and parachute containers with extra large pilot chutes and jump with only one parachute since, with minimal freefall time of around five seconds, there would be no time to use a reserve parachute. In these systems, the actual parachute canopy should also be specifically manufactured for BASE jumping.

Painter, sculptor and ‘father of the parachute’, Leonardo DaVinci first invented the concept of the ‘flying man’ in the 15th century, through his visions of saving people from burning buildings. It wasn’t until 1783 however, that the first parachute jump took place, by a Mr Louis-Sébastien Lenormand who leapt from the tower of the Montpellier observatory using a fourteenfoot-diameter canopy. Jean Pierre Blanchard invented the first packable parachute in 1785, crossing the channel in 1802 in a balloon and landing with a chute in England. The first actual BASE jump was performed on September 7th 1970 when Don Boyle jumped from the Royal Gorge Bridge in Colorado but it was the opening sequence of the 1976 James Bond movie, The Spy Who Loved Me, when stunt-man Rick Sylvester skied off Canada’s Mount Asgard, that properly exposed BASE jumping to the consciousness of the masses.

recreational activity. Sadly however, Boenish died in a BASE jump off Troll Wall in Norway (a place where BASE jumping rules) in 1984. BASE jumping is about as extreme as extreme sports get and is not something anyone should try without plenty of skydiving experience and a slightly demented thirst for danger. As well as the obvious risks of injury and death involved, BASE jumping is illegal, so if you are caught, expect to be charged with a whole host of things like trespassing, breaking and entering, reckless endangerment and vandalism. If you are bonkers enough to do it, then I guess you are not likely to care about those minor details! Helen Martin

Carl Boenish, a freefall cinematographer, is considered the father of modern BASE jumping, in 1978 he filmed the first jumps from El Capitan in Yosemite National Park using ramair parachutes and freefall tracking technique and in doing so defined the modern sport. The jumps were repeated, not as a publicity exercise or as a movie stunt, but as a true, recurring 75

Exciting People Pembury Cycles

0117 9428282 10 – 12 Gloucester Road Sites across Bristol

Bsb snowboarding

68 West street, Old Market, Bristol. BS20BL 0117 9550779 snowboards and everything to do with snowboarding since 1986

Bool’s Bicycles

3 Staple Hill Road, Fishponds, Bristol BS16 5AA 0117 939 2746 Repairs,Sell secondhand reconditioned bikes.

Ballooning Network Ltd

0117 9471050 Vauxhall House Coronation Rd, Southville Flights from £99. Champagne flights available.

First Flight

0117 9731073 Small local company offering a great service with 17 years experience.

Holey Skin

0117 3770613 285 Gloucester Road Highly creative designs for tattoos and piercing 100% clean and excellent aftercare.

The RaceWay

0800 3766111 Avonmouth All groups catered for, large indoor facility. Organisers go free.

Hamburger Hill PaintBall

0800 9803980. Any size group. 7 days, up to 200 people.

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Treat Yourself Information and musings on the splendid things in life: Food, drink and fun days out. To advertise in this section at a reduced rate please contact


78/ Bristol Milkshake Challenge 82/ The Royal Oak 84/ We Love Tea! 86/ Bristol Gets An Aquarium 88/ Otomí – The Mexico Shop 90/ Café Culture in Bristol

My Milkshake Brings All The Boys To The Yard

!Bristol Milkshake Challenge! favourite from When hearing the word “Milkshake”, the naïve among you will no doubt already have a firm are content the exhausted choice of strawberry, chocolate, banana or vanilla. This is all well and good if you this simply spending those long-awaited summer days sipping on your usual mundane beverage but for some, much deeper does not suffice. To ensure that you are not disappointed with your milky treat, my plan is to delve the milkshake into the world of milkshakes in search of weird and wonderful flavours to satisfy the needs of and value thrill seekers of Bristol. There will be six contenders, each marked on originality, generosity of portion for money. Let the Bristol Milkshake Challenge begin!!


otillos 1. Roc Rocotillos

An American-style diner which beckons punters in with a large sign on the side of the building specifying a range of absurd milkshake flavours, including ‘Crunchie Bar and Honey’ and even ‘Peanut Butter’. As a firm believer that Peanut Butter should remain a sandwich filling, I opted for the former: A very thick and flavoursome shake, perfect if you’re feeling decadent. Location: Clifton Triangle Flavour: Crunchie Bar and Honey Price: £3.25 Originality: 5/5 Portion: 4/5 Value for Money: 3/5 Additional Comments: I like the idea of having the option of an alcoholic ‘Hard Shake’ on the menu.

2. Lashi Lashings ngs Coffe Coffeee House

As I stumbled out of Rocotillos clutching my stomach, I was pleased to see my next port of call selling a slightly less sickly ‘Peaches and Cream’ flavour milkshake. Disappointingly however, they were out of peaches and I had to settle for the next best thing; ‘Malteaser’ flavour. Not quite as thick as the one at Rocotillos, it turned out to be surprisingly refreshing. Location: Broad Quay Flavour: Malteaser Price: £3.25 Originality: 4/5 Portion: 3/5 Value: 2/5 Additional Comments: Should blend the Malteasers a bit more or provide a larger straw.


4. Shake King 3. Supermarket Supermarket

For those of you who may be feeling impatient and simply cannot wait any longer to cool down with an affordable milkshake straight from the fridge, the supermarkets’ small selection of flavours could be just what you desire. Friji’s ‘Chocolate Fudge Brownie’ is a good choice if you’re trying to look after the pennies whilst still experimenting with something a bit out of the ordinary. Location: Everywhere Flavour: Chocolate Fudge Brownie Price: £1.02 Originality: 2/5 Portion: 3/5 Value for Money: 3/5 Additional Comments: Well, it can’t be too bad if it’s endorsed by The Simpsons.


Much to my misfortune, my favourite biscuit, Hobnobs, do not taste as nice when liquefied and made into a milkshake. Although Shake King boasts a menu of over 150 flavours, it does not necessarily mean that each abnormal flavour will work as a shake. Having said that, with flavours ranging from ‘Fig Rolls’ to ‘Trebor Extra Strong Mints’, you cannot fault them on originality. Location: Broadmead Flavour: Hobnob Price: £3.40 Originality: 4/5 Portion: 4/5 Value for Money: 3/5 Additional Comments: You can also suggest your own flavours, as if 150 is not enough!

6. Shake Shake Away Tout Mange Tout 5. Mange

Although it doesn’t claim to have an exotic range of shake flavours, with the hope of being pleasantly surprised, I gave Mange Tout a try. Sadly, I ended up with a disappointing, lukewarm raspberry shake that had never seen a raspberry in its life. If you like to play it safe with your milkshakes, then Mange Tout may be the place for you; however I was on a quest for something a bit more extraordinary. Location: Corn Street Flavour: Raspberry Price: £2.25 Originality: 2/5 Portion: 3/5 Value for Money: 3/5 Additional Comments: I don’t know what I expected from a café named after a French runner bean...

Despite being faced with a seemingly infinite number of flavoursome possibilities, the sign outside helped me to make up my mind and before long I was tucking in to today’s special; ‘Skittles’, ‘Jelly Beans’ and ‘Popping Candy’ sprinkles. A dream come true for the sweet-toothed milkshake fanatic, but as I had already made my way through a fair few milkshakes, finishing the sugary ‘Shake Away Special’ was definitely a challenge! Location: The Arcade Flavour: Skittles and Jelly Beans with Popping Candy on top Price: £3.40 Originality: 5/5 Portion: 4/5 Value for Money: 3/5 Additional Comments: Milkshakes extremely sugary and should come with a dental warning.

As there can only be one winner of the Bristol Milkshake Challenge, I think it has to go to the very deserving Shake Away as they have a colossal variety of milkshake flavours catering for absolutely everyone, unless of course you are lactose intolerant. Louis Catlett Illustration by Laurie Stansfield

The Royal Oak Situated on Gloucester Road, The Royal Oak pub has undergone something of a transformation over the last year. Before known as The John Cabot, it is no longer a bit seedy but newly welcoming and tastefully decorated; it strikes a good balance between pub and restaurant. It’s definitely a contrast to the MaXin Chicken across the road: instead of greasy nuggets think marinated olives and a pint of Peroni, old books on the window sills and a palm tree in the garden. A mishmash of styles come together to create a sophisticated yet easy-going atmosphere, although, strangely, it all seems a bit familiar. The shiny Italian coffee machine and the traditional stove, the gentleman’s club easy-chair and the pretty French waitress should clash but don’t


and represents the bold but successful assimilation of cultures that has swept the UK over the last ten years. The prices are reasonable: around five pounds for starter, a tenner for a main in the evening and eight for a lunch dish. Thursday’s steak night promises two 8oz rump steaks, chips, salad and a bottle of house red for 25 pounds. It’s not just standard pub fare though, as the devilled lamb’s kidneys testify. When I head over for some lunch, Mike the Head Chef is experimenting with new dishes for the summer menu, such as poached chicken with bacon and cream. I pass up the gnocchi with wild mushrooms, parmesan and chives and instead opt

for the pan-fried halloumi and pomegranate salad with lemon yoghurt dressing. My lunch partner goes for the home-made fish-finger sandwich and seasonal greens. When the waitress brings over the dishes she gives me the fishfinger sandwich and I’m tempted to hang on to it; the mistake is understandable as it’s a real ‘man’wich with crunchy haddock slices between two great slabs of fresh granary bread. Chasing pomegranate seeds round the plate, my partner attempts to fit the sandwich in her mouth but has to resort to a knife and fork.

Over coffee in the garden later, I’m tempted to sink into an armchair, pick out a book or two and while away the afternoon enjoying the sun and the music drifting out of the french doors, perhaps staying for the venison sausages. “It’s a big ‘ol garden in-et?” remarks one grizzled local builder to another, having a pint and some lunch. Wondering if they are going to fire up the barbecue in the evening, it strikes me that even if it’s almost a cliché of a modern gastro-pub; it’s a good cliché. Maybe I should move to Gloucester Road for good? Laurence Owen Photos by Ian Bradley


I love, Love, LOVE Tea! As she got up to leave, I stood up with her, to check. Her mug was nearly full. She had rejected my tea. Again! I wasn’t insulted (well, a bit), but surely you just ‘make’ tea? What’s the flippin’ secret?


Looking back, I have to say: I blame my parents – dunk, dunk – litre of milk. Now, uh, I shudder. Pasty tea, not a hint of tealeaf, there’s so much to behold in a really good brew. Contradictorily, historically my older relatives have prided themselves on tea. I remember the afternoon tea and weird chocolate fridge cakes fondly, in pleasant butterscotch/sepia colour. Every Sunday around three thirty, classically, I would spill Irish Granny’s tea filled china cup within seconds of it arriving in my clutches. It happened every single time. However, on no grounds was I getting anything other than that flowery china (luckily the springboard fluffy carpets would preserve cups intact). The idea of seeing Irish Granny drinking from a mug was as likely as witnessing her twiddling spaghetti on a fork. It’s not that she’s narrow minded, it’s that she knows that lots of little cups somehow makes tea extra good – and she’d be appalled at the drop is tea making standards. Irish Granny is now 92 years old and every time I go to her seaside nest, she demands I crack out the tea paraphernalia and these days some ‘Kipling’ batten burgs. Grannies know. Tea is to be appreciated. Not to stereotype now, but what stopped me in my tea abuse tracks; wasn’t just my Granny watching over me make tea from her hard backed chair, it was my time spent drinking beverages with Northerners. Find a pot, two to three tablespoons of leaves and leave it. Or lacking instruments, leave your teabag in longer than five seconds.

Just these little pieces of advice...time, pride and tea respect. Now I make enough teapots bursting with the lovely stuff to make any wonderland child woozy. “T?” is a solid, meaningful text message indicting help required/help is there/gossip to tell/ pregnancy/break from work/PMT/relationship breakdowns/ new relationships/need to just hang out/loneliness and death. It’s the trooper’s and similarly, the slacker’s, choice. What’s more, it is good for you. As public health nutritionist Dr. Carrie Ruxton and colleagues at Kings College London said in their 2003 report: “Drinking tea is actually better for you than drinking water. Water is essentially replacing fluid. Tea replaces fluids and contains antioxidants so it’s got two things going for it.” The UK tea council agrees: “There is about eight times the amount of ‘anti-oxidant power’ in three cups of tea than there is in one apple.”

With the opening of tea shops all over the UK in recent years, the afternoon break has become tremendously in vogue. See the Tea Appreciation Society’s website for a comprehensive update on all the best tea houses around. However you do it, tea is a glorious tradition; it doesn’t make you feel crazy like coffee or indulgent like hot chocolate. It’s a saviour and a beauty, the best and oldest time out around. Make it properly, know ‘your’ favourite and feel the joy it brings. Afternoon tea at the Ritz: £39. Tea at home: Nowt. Do it! Helen Martin Illustration by Laurie Stansfield

Attic and Beeses Riverside Bar And Tea Gardens are definite favourite places to enjoy a good brew in Bristol. The latter, which you can get to by a regular boat, has a romantic local history: Anne Beese, a Christian lady who discouraged the drinking of alcohol, first opened the gardens way back in 1846. A big sign, “Bees Tea Gardens”, would inform the boated traveller that they had reached their destination. Today’s cream teas are enjoyed in a building erected in the 1960s. Gorgeous. Another haunt is the top of Whiteladies Road, holding; Tea with us a charity cafe, simply and comfortably designed and always packed. 85

Bristol Gets An Aquarium Bristol is regarded as a port city. We’ve got the harbour, we’ve got the bridges, we’ve got the boats, the ferries, the locks, the wildlife and now, thankgod, we’ve got the aquarium too! Winner!

intimately. The designers have also cleverly incorporated the Imax Cinema into the experience so you can watch an amazing 3D film about dolphins, whales and other creatures that would never fit in an aquarium.

Located in the heart of the Harbourside development, just behind the waterfront, Bristol Aquarium opened its doors earlier this year after more than twelve months in the making and £4million of investment. Inside, the building is a professional and fascinating spectacle that educates and lets you enjoy the boundless diversity of the aquatic world.

The centrepiece of Bristol Aquarium though has to be the gigantic display tank (full of 260,000 litres of water) which you can view from above, from the side or from underneath via the stunning walk-through tunnel. Looking inside it’s like a busting underwater city full of various fish, sharks and crustaceans, all vying for position and forever swimming on their way to

To make things a little less overwhelming, the aquarium is divided into various themed sections: The entrance has been done up like the neglected hull of a sunken ship with beautiful curved portholes permeating the rusty, metal walls as you walk along; there’s a tropical rainforest section with luscious vegetation, wooden walkways and a crashing waterfall; and a laboratory area where you can learn about the animals more


somewhere. And that brings us on to the real attraction of the aquarium – the animals! Bristol Aquarium has around 7,000 individual creatures made up of around 250 species including cod, eels, lobsters, turtles, puffer fish, sea horses, living coral, piranhas, starfish, dogfish, catfish, jellyfish, clown fish, over 15 species of sharks and rays, and one beautiful Giant Pacific octopus.

In the worlds of Sebastian; “Life is much better, down where it’s wetter!” Illustrations by Amy Rhian


Otomí: Made In Mexico Arguably the best bit about the Arcade in Clifton Village is Otomí, the Mexican import shop responsible for Bristol’s recent influx of wrestling masks and Day Of The Dead art. Named after the Otomí Indians in Mexico whose paintings were the first items sold in the shop, this haven of Mexican culture is so much more than paper mâché skeletons and Frida Kahlo folk art. If all manner of fairly-traded Mexican art, tiles, mirrors, textiles, kitchenware, furniture and jewellery isn’t enough, there’s also the food...! Seriously though, if you have the opportunity to cook with gorgeous dried chipotle peppers and Mexican oregano, to sample luscious nopales (cactus!), to indulge in chicken with a Mexican mole sauce as delicious as any in Mexico, why wouldn’t you? And Otomí makes it easy for the Mexican food novice – simply ask for their starter pack of salsas, nopales and mole. I reckon you’ll get a little expert cooking advice too. Over the past couple years, Louise and Alex haven’t just brought something out of the ordinary to home decor and British menus, a community of Mexicans, Colombians, Chileans, Venezuelans, Cubans and more has sprung up around the shop, no small thanks to the Tortilla Club.

An email list announcing fresh corn tortillas for all; perfect to warm up on the stove for Sunday morning bacon, egg and cheese tacos (don’t forget the salsa de guajillo). You can often find Alex and Louise cooking up a spicy array of Mexican finger food at El Rincón, Southville’s quirky outlier – a Spanish tapas bar and Spanish-speaking community of its own right – and they’ve been known to set up shop in the Tobacco Factory Market from time to time. This multi-talented pair are also currently working on their first cookbook together and before too long Bristol café culture can expect to get schooled in the tasty delights of Mexican breakfast . Nothin’ like a breakfast taco with some rich, black Mexican coffee. Day Of The Dead is an extra special time for Otomí. With colourful face painting and a communal altar, Bristol is super lucky to catch a glimpse into this vibrant Mexican tradition of remembering the dead. After all, no habría vida sin muerte: There would be no life without death. Elena Goodrum



Café Culture in Bristol Discoveries, aspirations, perils, mourning, love, deceit and silent company; as the privately public venue reacts with the liquid treats, the inconspicuous café becomes a Mecca of secret enchantment. Whether with a friend, acquaintance or solitary, it is a chance to indulge in yourself or your accomplice. Alone is very good. Like a catholic repenting your sins behind a swirly grate, you are fantastic, beautifully blighted and anonymous; protected by a bubble of seating and varying souls. Café strangers know nothing and never ask why. 1963, Bernard Kops writes in The World Is A Wedding: “So I came into my kingdom of Soho where I could be as mad as I a café called The Alex I wrote the day away. The bums of Soho became my family, the café my womb.” Looking into the history of the café, one finds a place of poetical loners and riotous debaters; Sartre and Simone De Beauvoir discussing the theories of existentialism; Keats musing in Vienna; Henrik Ibsen in the same spot at 2pm everyday in Oslo, Freud holding consultations in a wood panelled room in Vienna; Kafka reading the first draft of Metamorphosis aloud in a back room in Prague; Oscar Wilde scandalising himself dramatically


by flaunting about with young men. Full of the potential of tomorrow and the excitement of the moment, the café has held the beating hearts of the common, the influential and the silent peoples. Those who were in the background of centuries past, who sought hushed company and escapism, posthumously having their hearts laid open, quiet no more. Cue pun: Café culture is brewing up a treat in Bristol. In 2003, 358 years after the first café was born in Venice, the Commons Housing, Planning and Local Government Committee called for an “urban renaissance” in cities including Bristol. With less “vertical drinking”, the Committee stated in its report that cities needed more cafés open longer hours, for a calm and pleasant urban environment. “Cafe Culture” in Bristol has since grown, with establishments popping up and blooming all over the city: Coffee No1, Clifton’s Primrose Cafe, Montpelier’s Bristolian (a true beauty), all the Lounge’s, the Boston Tea Parties, various cafés all along the harbour and no-one can be blind to the success of The Canteen. It’s a delight to walk around the city with contented beings dappling the pavements and breathing life into buildings. While many a café in Paris stacks


away its bamboo tables and chairs for good, the recession hitting the loved culture hard, Bristol is finding its café feet. Our cafés are no longer there primarily for businessmen’s tuna baguettes, bored buggy pushers and ‘informal’ meetings, now in Bristol cafés are increasingly for the purpose of sitting in a metaphorical hammock. How marvellous for all! 1986, Jeffrey Bernard writes in Low Life: “One of the things I loathed most about school, the army and regular employment was the feeling that I was missing something and that in the pubs, clubs, cafés and dives there was some sort of magic practice that I wasn’t able to conjure with.” Looking into the cup of the future; late night alcohol free cafés would be great (not if you are at “just want chips” level of wasted however). Like times past, Bordeaux’s late night cafés are full of discussion, reflection and peace. You know... when the night is over in its present sense and you don’t want to go home yet, that prophetic feeling when you want to chat (indeed it may be rubbish but tangible feeling is in the quiet of the night) - the next stage of the evening when the day horizons are raw and unformed is where new avenues can be discovered. Café culture should rise to the heights it can in Bristol. The cafe breeds clarity, a stop-clock for the road runner and an ever important and historical first aid kit. So let us all go, sink into a seat, muse a bit and chiefly, just ‘be’. 92

Helen Martin Photos by Laura Palmer

Glamorous People Conrad at Jamesons


Fresh and Wild

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0117 9739614 167 Whiteladies Road Superior kitchen utensils and craft Amazing Retro Furniture and fabulous gifts St Nic’s Market Market Glass Arcade

The Boutique

0117 3763564 Unique, beautiful artwork by a great cooperative 20 - 21 Lower Park Row

0117 9739570 33 Regent St, Clifton. Ranges of limited manufacture clothing, perfect for any occasion

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0117 9241460 184 Gloucester Rd Flowers for all occasions and beautiful gifts.

0117 9743882 17 Regent St, Clifton. Beautifully crafted clothing, perfect for glamorous occasions.

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Enjoy Yourself Information and musings on the entertaining things in life: Music, clubbing, theatre, comedy, art, cinema and festivals. To advertise in this section at a reduced rate please contact


96/ SY’s Summer Festival Checklist 100/ Bristol Old Vic – Back On Track? 103/ Teenage Rampage 106/ Local Band Profile: Pete Roe 108/ DJ Profile: Portmanteau 110/ Garden Parties! 112/ Summer Festivals

SY’s Summer Festival Checklist Everything you need to pack for the ultimate Summer Festival experience. Make 2010 a classic summer! A Strong Friend – This fellow can be a vital commodity for many things at the festival; carrying beer, sitting on their shoulders for a view and even protection if you happen to bump into the wrong person too many times. Cereal Bars – Trick your stomach into thinking you’ve eaten a breakfast.


Fancy Dress – Festivals are funny so why not add to it? If you’re single, dressing like an idiot is a sure fire way to garner some attention. Just steer clear of that old Harry Potter costume: Not cool. Cigarettes/Tobacco/Skins – Even if you don’t smoke, in camps these can become a rare luxury and by the final morning they are traded like currency, just like in prison. Yay. Wet Suit – Stay super cosy if it rains and also handy for a spot of crowd surfing (gawf!).

Toilet Roll – Don’t get caught short, panic and have to use a sock. It’s happened before, trust me…

Wet-Wipes and/or Deodorant – Shower in a packet/and or can, although everyone’s as likely to smell as bad as one another by the third day.

Cardboard Cut-Out of Yourself – Can be used to hold your place in the queue for the loos while you try and locate that much needed falafel.

SOS Flares – Make sure you and your friends can always find each other with ease.

Mini Spirit Bottles – Fight the inflated alcohol prices at festival bars and hide these in places they can’t be seen for that extra hit when the mood takes you. Wellies – Don’t risk not taking a pair. If you do, it will rain and it WILL be all your fault.

Step Ladder - Guarantee yourself a good view in any crowd. A “Cool” T-shirt – Instead of ‘I Am Spartacus’, or ‘I Am The Stig’, I’ve got a ‘I Am Big Jeff’ shirt. Jealous? Condoms – For obvious reasons…don’t take home a kid or any diseases as a memento. 97

Drugs – No not the naughty kind (we couldn’t possibly condone that!) but anti-acids, paracetamol, ibuprofen and the odd rennie could come in handy on more than one occasion. Ear Plugs – Ram them in your ears as you collapse in your tent to be sure you wake at a reasonable hour the next day, say 2pm. Just don’t get caught wearing them during the daytime or it’s image suicide.


Rubber Dingy and/or a Canoe – Remember Glastonbury 2005? Well this could come in handier than a tent. Night Vision Goggles – Find your tent and way to the toilet at night without tripping over those guide wires. Sun-Cream – You never know? Oh, and the ticket. Don’t forget that.

Adam Hooper and Matt Whittle

Bristol Old Vic Bristol Old Vic, the stunningly beautiful theatre on Kings Street in the heart of the city centre, has had a very turbulent past few years. For those that need reminding, here’s a little recap of what happened: Having fist opened in 1776, it was one of the oldest continually working theatres in the country until it closed its doors in the summer of 2007 citing desperately needed structural refurbishments and huge debts. Reading between the lines, the theatre had been in a downward spiral for years; the shows they were putting on frankly weren’t very good so the public had just stopped coming and the second large problem was the insular nature of the entire Bristol Old Vic establishment. During these problem years they seemed to regard themselves as some sort of ivory tower, culturally superior to anything else going on in Bristol and so instead of working alongside Bristol’s other theatres, festivals and events, they excluded them and therefore themselves, loosing a lot of friends and support along the way. Their 2007 closure sparked an outcry though and the public came out in force to support the theatre’s future but also demanded changes. Three years on now and it seems like a good time to take stock and see what has changed at the Bristol Old Vic. The slate having been wiped clean, the theatre reopened to the public in March 2009 and has remained so since, providing a full and varied programme that, on the whole, seems to have gone down very well. A new artistic director has been put in place in the form of Tom Morris (yes, HIS brother) as well as a new executive director, Emma Stenning, and the great thing is they seem to be as passionate about the building, its heritage and its future as they are about theatre itself. Most importantly however, they have acknowledged and value all the other theatre and cultural events that


go on in Bristol and they seem to understand the need to work with and support them for mutual benefit – the theatre’s collaboration with the excellent local company, Shakespeare At The Tobacco Factory, on Uncle Vanya in November 2009 being a good example of this. Also, their willingness to embrace and try new things in the theatre has been commendable and, well, sometimes down right exciting! Their aim is to have five flexible performance spaces by 2012 and when they’re putting on superb events like the Bristol Jam (The UK’s first festival of improvisation), Bristol Ferment (a week of work-in-progress showcases), Theatre:24 (local actors, writers and directors creating and putting on 6 brand new shows in 24 hours) and Short Fuses (a stimulus for new local work) as well as being the hub of the best Mayfest to date (Bristol’s festival of contemporary theatre), a visit to the Bristol Old Vic can never again be thought of as boring or predictable. Impressed by this turn around and commendable revitalisation, the Arts Council England recently awarded the venue a grant of £6.1million which in turn promoted the Bristol City Council to donate £1million. This money will go towards a continuing £19million redevelopment and refurbishment project that will hopefully put them firmly back on track to being the cultural landmark and hub they should be.


That’s not to say things are perfect yet though. The financial stability of the theatre is still in the balance (highlighted by more redundancies this spring) and on their larger scale productions, there still seems to be a tendency to look to London for inspiration; however, overall it seems the Bristol Old Vic has turned a corner. It has realised its place as part of Bristol’s cultural output rather than separate or above it and now the road to recovery is understood, they just need help walking it - your help. No matter how much investment a venue gets, the theatre can never properly recover if people aren’t visiting and enjoying everything it has to offer. Whether it’s traditional works, groundbreaking contemporary theatre, or boundary pushing festivals, Bristol Old Vic now has it all and you owe it to yourself to get down there and embrace it! Illustrations by Tina Remiz


Teenage Rampage Thank you 2010. The music industry continues to flounder, first the death of BBC 6Music, more cookie-cutter synth-pop and plumbing the all new depths of NOW 75. You may come to the conclusion that my outlook on new music for the decade is a rather negative one; this is thankfully not the case because of Teenage Rampage. Run by Bristol Music Foundation, Teenage Rampage hosts a number of southwest regional heats, everywhere from Truro to Gloucester to Bournemouth, where the best in emerging acts get to play showcase gigs to leading music industry members. Previous winners of Teenage Rampage such as The Orchid, The Naturals, The Lorcarnos, and Napoleon In Rags have gone on to achieve great things having really raised the profile of new music in the southwest.

This year takes these opportunities even further with the winners getting an industry mentor, a day in a recording studio, a track on the Teenage Rampage Summer Tour 2010 CD and they get to play at the Teenage Rampage Stage at this year’s Bristol Festival. As well as all this, Teenage Rampage runs an apprenticeship program helping under 19s to start their music career. This lets them grab the chance to help promote and run local heats, as well as working alongside professionals from the music industry and learning about marketing, management and running a record label. The summer tour runs throughout July and August and the deadline for applications for bands and apprentices was 18th June. Looking at the amazing acts to come out of last year’s competition, I can’t wait to see what 2010 will hold.


I caught up with last year’s Bristol-based winners from Teenage Rampage. They are the raw, tightly weaving, boundary pushing, sound-scape conjuring art-rockers known as The Naturals. SY: Since winning last year’s Teenage Rampage what have you been up to? Harry: Since then we’ve been gigging lots and have been blessed with a great range of support slots, such as Bombay Bicycle Club at 02 Academy. That gig was great because it was packed out and gave us a chance to play to a completely new audience! SY: What did you get out of your Teenage Rampage experience?


Felix: It really helped us appreciate the amount of effort that goes into a tour. Relying on other people (namely our parents) for transport, trying to stay friendly with everyone we meet in order to build connections so to speak. Robin: Yeah, it definitely helped us in terms of relationships with other bands and what not. Just knowing what to do and to what extent became more apparent with the more shows we played on the tour. SY: Do you think there’s enough ways for young people to get involved in the music industry? Felix: I guess it’s more a question of whether there are enough music industry folk willing to give young bands or budding managers a chance these days. With the slow decline of the industry comes somewhat of a hesitance to invest in something new, which could explain the countless replica bands being released at the moment.

SY: What’s the future for The Naturals? SY: Any predictions on young bands to look out for in the southwest?

Felix: We’ve had interest from labels before but the timing never felt right, so hopefully they haven’t forgotten about us and our new found freedom will help us knuckle down.

Harry: Yes loads and loads! For me I’d have to say Farthing Wood: clever, catchy and without a doubt and one of the best bands in Bristol!

Harry: Well we’re currently booking a tour for July which would coincide with a new single, Gift Horse.

Felix: Archimedes are another bunch. Robin: The Locarnos are an indie pop delight. They’re way more musically adept than the majority of indie-pop bands actually, so perhaps they’re not an indie-pop delight. They transcend genres which puts them above that ilk of bands.

Robin: While we wait for the new records to be written and the tours to take shape, I’m working on trying to paper-mache my entire house. It’s a bit of Naturals hibernation but we’ll be back. Watch this space. Sam Betts 105

Local Band Profile: Pete Roe


Bristol’s folk scene could currently be described as being in ‘rude health’. This city is blessed with a plethora of fantastic bands who all dress in tweed and flat-caps and sing heartfelt songs about devils stealing brides and the weather beating at their hearts through their big, bushy beards. A glance at the A-board outside Golden Lion, at The Folk House’s notice window or at the chalk board in the Old Duke will see them full of names like Sheelanagig, Babel, The Zen Hussies, Pepino, The Wraiths, Moscow Drug Club, Jane Taylor, Fromage en Feu and Yes Sir Boss, just some of the bands that have been pushing Bristol’s folk and gypsy loving scene at gigs and festivals across the city for years. One name, deeply involved in the scene, and a firm crowd favourite that used to be a staple of these listings, is Pete Roe. Born in 1981, folk singer-songwriter Pete Roe owns the most tweed, wears the broadest flat-cap and has the biggest beard out of any of Bristol’s gypsy-folksters and although he now resides in London, he is still Bristolian through and through and we thought it was about time we honoured and revisited his great talent.

Blessed as a multi-instrumentalist, Pete is particularly famed for his mesmerising guitar and piano talents and his beguiling voice. These qualities soon got him noticed and for the past few years he has been a key part of singer-songwriter sensation Laura Marling’s band, performing with her regularly live (including at Colston Hall last Spring – Woop!), playing on her latest album and often supporting her at gigs in his own right. In between, Pete managed to release his own debut album, Propellor, in 2006, an EP in 2008, Animals, and now the time has come for another EP which will be coming on Communion Records this summer. A totally solo - one man and his guitar - affair, you can expect the new record to be brimming with just the sort of darkly romantic, melodic and technically superb folky goodness we’ve come to expect from a talent like Pete’s. He’s also touring the country with a series of summer headline gigs to accompany the EP release so get out there and experience Pete Roe’s magic for yourselves!


DJ Profile: Portmanteau Getting noticed as an electronic music outfit in Bristol is a thankless uphill struggle. Not because Bristol as a place makes it hard for aspiring producers you understand, quite the reverse in fact: Bristol has a long tradition of spearheading emerging genres and fostering the artists that define them, from the Wild Bunch to Massive Attack to Portishead, as well as Roni Size, DJ Die and Daddy Skitz, all giants in their field. The last few years have seen the rise of Dubstep, from Appleblim to the H.E.N.C.H crew and, well, you get the idea‌ The trouble is, with so many madly talented outfits knocking about, you have to be something really special to stand out. Enter Portmanteau. They’re making pretty serious waves thanks to their remix antics which have resulted in some high profile up and comers clamouring at their door and a palpable flashing blip on the radar of the national music press. Their live performances are earning them a fearsome reputation as crazed warrior ravers and if you get the chance, you should definitely see what the fuss is all about.


Both members of the duo (Mark and Pete) come from a background of more traditional band setups and that ethos is apparent in their approach to performance. They actually play their equipment on stage, several synthesisers and samplers plus live instruments all being thrashed to within an inch of their lives. It can go wrong of course, which is part of the deal. This is how live music should be. They sound a bit like Drop The Lime but with a schizophrenic edge that doesn’t let you drop your guard, plus a hint of Murcof and possibly Otto von Schirach thrown in. If that sounds like an odd mix, well, it is. Needless to say, they’re not really toeing the line of current trends and that’s a good thing. It’s less easy then doing what the world expects of you. To forge ahead in your own direction is to push at the sides of genres and maybe break free completely into something new. It’s what artists in this city have been doing for decades. Portmanteau have 2 self released EPs and are doing remixes left right and centre. Gustave Savy


Garden Party Party Party! Summer might not be the most consistent of seasons but the way we optimistically dream, it could still happen and I am resolute that garden time in England is still the best of all times. As Sam Keen famously stated; “Deep summer is when laziness finds respectability.”

Summer music festivals are the ultimate garden parties - great pits of chaotic heaven and a chance to get the feathered headdress out and the tribal face paints on. Like dancing in a cauldron of musical joy, why seriously care about the dirt, what’s not to love about being on your own desert island disc?

The sun is up until ten, the pigeons coo from six and refreshing alcoholic beverages are not frowned upon at any hour - because it’s summer and you’re in the garden! Halloumi, peppers, burgers, sausages, salmon - its barbeque central and everyone is a chef. Add some candles, outdoor fairy lights and some music and you got yourself a classy, grassy joint. I recommend listening to Volare by The McGuire Sisters (very late 50s, whisky chinking, lips pouting) or jazz is also good for a garden party, but as it’s your party, you’re on the decks – Dirty Diggers, For The Haters? Do it!

Not only a time for garden parties, sun cream and wellington boots, summer is also the time when everyone unleashes their passions. It’s a cliché but there’s a delightful liberated feel to the summer months. Just look at Shakespeare’s consistent references to summer when discussing matters of the heart, the classic being; “Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day?” So I implore you to think positively about our English summer regardless of the weather. If you let them, good times will be had. “Where you tend a rose, my lad, a thistle cannot grow,” The Secret Garden Party, Frances Hodgson Burnett. Helen Martin




Summer = Festivals “Summer Festivals used to be free you know?” those immortal words I’m forced to endure every year from my father as I contemplate yet another summer where I choose to spend hundreds of pounds of my pay packet on festival tickets. It’s safe to say that this year I’ve been more than over indulgent in a season that will see me take in at least three festivals within three months. It’s this statement that makes me question why I, and so many others, choose to shun summer holidays abroad in the guaranteed sun to run the risk of a dreary weekend camping in the great British countryside.

However, I believe there is something more that draws us to these events; almost a primal urge of ritual and worship that rarely exists in our modern world. These events are our Mecca where we gather, as one, to pay tribute to our demigods and to enjoy music that inspires us and keeps us sane in our day to day lives. A weekend where the most eclectic range of people can join together to let loose in a place where society’s usual rules do not apply; after all, there are few places where you can walk around dancing half-naked, swigging from a box of wine and not even earn a sideways glance.

There is something about festivals that will always remain a draw even in our modern western society of luxuries. Thousands of people will always pay a small fortune to live, four or five days in potentially muddy fields and freezing cold tents. Of course the music remains the biggest draw and when you take into account the amount of bands you’re going to see and what concert tickets might ordinarily cost you individually, the cost of entrance to a festival can seem an absolute bargain.

You may think me, stupidly precocious for comparing these activities to some sort of spiritual experience but the truth is for some of us there is nothing better than that feeling you get when stood in a field (even in the rain) with your favourite band playing and the hairs rising up on the back of your neck; is this not akin to a religious experience? And in a world that so freely donates to its churches, why not pay for this? After the weekend is over you’ll know you paid for it with more than just your pay packet. Adam Hooper Images by James Seymour 113

Prepare Yourself Get yourself prepared for the months ahead. To advertise in this section at a reduced rate please contact


115/ Auntie Harper Fields Your Questions 116/ Mystic Ginger’s Horoscopes 118/Decoding Dreams

Auntie Harper

SY’s Agony Aunt answers your questions…

1. Where’s the best place to spot summer babes in Bristol on a hot summer’s day? In Bedminster, walking with a limp and begging for more as they come out of my flat. 2. My girlfriend wants to have phone-sex but I’m not sure how to...? Step 1: Girlfriend lies down on bed with mobile phone, plastic bag and a big pot of lube. Step 2: Girlfriend inserts phone in bag and covers bag in lube. Step 3: Girlfriend inserts baggy phone thing in vag. Step 4: Boy phones girlfriend, girlfriend smiles and makes mess on bed. Step 5: Girlfriend dumps boyfriend for a 2nd phone. 3. What’s more important to have in a boyfriend - intelligent, funny or handsome? Well, I’ve got all 3 and another 10 inches to have on the side and guess what? Your mumma loves every inch of it! To put your queries to Auntie Harper’s sympathetic ear just email:



Cancer: Sand gets everywhere doesn’t it? Yes, it’s all very passionate at the time but those microscopic shrimp have to lay their eggs somewhere. Just make sure you get medical insurance first.

Capricorn: Everyone knows that Capricorns are sweaty but good lord, this summer is looking like one long wet T-shirt contest for you, you slippery sucker. I don’t know what to tell you, except to carry a towel at all times.

Leo: Jupiter is ruling your chart and he says, ‘No festivals for you this summer!’ It’s okay though, your life will be a bit like a festival. You won’t be sleeping, eating or washing enough. And you will be living in a tent. Sweet.

Aquarius: Holiday romance this summer, lucky Aquarius. Shortlived but so magical and passionate. And you will remember it afterwards, every time it hurts to pee. Ah, Stavros, you big hairy dreamboat.

Virgo: Summer of love for you, Virgo! And don’t let people tell you it won’t last or that it’s unnatural and sick. And don’t let them catch you. Alright, it’s legal, but only because it’s too strange for anyone to have made a law about.

Pisces: With Neptune, planet of cruel irony, ruling your chart, you will spend all summer looking wistfully out of the office window at the glorious day, and then as soon as you go out to eat your lunch on the grass it will rain.

Libra: A lost Frisbee leads to an adventure in the bushes for you, Libra. I won’t say any more except that I am happy for you both. You have been so lonely, and Scabby Bob has been waiting in the bushes for a long time.

Aries: Alright, Aries! You have Pluto, planet of driving-with-thetop-down, rising in your chart. Pluto is also planet of fallingover-with-your-trousers-down, but you’ll get over that, if your workmates ever let you forget it.

Scorpio: A sad summer, Scorpio. Aliens will almost certainly infiltrate your brain. First sign is likely to be thinking that you can hear reggae coming from next door’s garden.

Taurus: Getting bronzed this summer, Taurus! Okay, naked, starving and severely dehydrated, but tanned. You’ll laugh later, if they find you in time. And you won’t go off with another unregistered tour guide in a hurry.

Sagittarius: Looking good, Sagittarius! Got your beach body ready - I mean beach-ball body obviously - but it’s all summery anyway. You bounce down to the beach and let those rolls just roll on out.

Gemini: Ah, summer – time to get re-acquainted with Mr Whippy, Gemini. This year, make sure you have clear boundaries and a code word. Remember last year? You said ‘Ow! No, no, stop it, Mr Whippy!’ and he kept on whipping. 117

Dream Interpretation How many times have you been out having coffee with a friend and they say ‘I had the strangest dream last night’? What follows is usually a tale of twisted environments, people doing strange things and then a good, shared chuckle. On that token, have you ever had someone come up to you and say ‘I had the most normal dream last night’ …unless you’re a cognitive therapist dealing with a unique patient who has an altered sense of reality, I highly doubt it. Some people are too fixed on being serious or being ‘in real world’ but let me just say, to the subconscious mind, a dream experience is just as real as the physical ‘real’ world. Modern science tells us dreams are the subconscious rearranging of memories and sensory experiences whilst our other senses are unconscious or asleep and from this perspective, it is looked down upon to daydream or to use your imagination as some people often believe that dreams are just childish and silly. Except for a few psychologists, science-based practices rarely see the point in abstracting further meaning from dreams. Thankfully not everyone thinks this way.


Metaphysics, philosophy, spirituality and people’s genuine inquisitive nature will often go beyond seeing dreams as a mere projection and will want to look at, and analyse, their content. Even if you take the scientific view, you are obviously being witness to this process, so why ignore it? Just like your emotions are an indicator of how you feel about your life, your dreams are telling you about the thoughts and processes that are going on within you that aren’t necessarily on the surface. Your dreams are potent tools that reveal subconscious ideas, express inner desires and expose much more about yourself that

could otherwise remain unnoticed. The view of science is that dreams look at events, symbols and places as representational aspects from your memory and day-to-day life - just not literal in their arrangement or placement. So if you take the view that you’re being shown something, but not in its correct context, how can you work out what the mind is trying to rearrange, or what your subconscious is telling you? It’s about seeing common objects, places, people as symbols, and how you feel about them. There are many books and sites that talk about common dream symbols and make great guides; however, everyone can apply different meaning to different objects and places. As an example, say you dream of a cat crossing the road in front of you, so what does it mean? First, do you like cats? If you do, it could represent a positive independent influence in front of you. If you hate cats, it would make you think differently, something

or someone to be wary of. Also, was the road somewhere you know? If so, however you feel about the cat, could apply to that place, or if that place reminds you about someone/something/ situation, it could pertain to that. Just a small thing to note, if you see something happen in a dream you don’t like – don’t worry! It’s just your mind showing you hopes, fears and thoughts. Knowing how much you could miss something if it vanished in your dreams is just an emotional indicator of how much you value it, not necessarily a premonition! Remember your dreams are a guide, so if you want to know what something means, first have a think about the particular elements in the dream and see how you FEEL first. Then look to a book/website for further guidance. Either way, have fun exploring! Lauren Neko If you would like some help with your dream interpretations, feel free to visit to post and share your dreams online.


Suit Yourself Magazine Issue 38 Editor: Matt Whittle / Executive Editor: Faye Penfold / Design and Illustration: James Penfold & Louisa Christadoulou / Front Cover: Amy Rhian All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced in whole or in part without the permission of Suit Yourself Magazine. Suit Yourself Magazine is an independent publication distributed throughout Bristol. Advertising Enquiries: Contributors for Issue 38: Lara Angol, Juan Arrabe, Lisa Bartlett, Sam Betts, Ian Bradley, Kyle Von Brown, Natalie Burns, Kayleigh Cassidy, Louis Catlett, Anna Freeman, Elena Goodrum, Heidi Gough, James Harper, Adam Hooper, Anna Leon, Paul Lever, Daniel Lilley, Helen Martin, Lauren Neko, Laurence Owen, Laura Palmer, Tina Remiz, Amy Rhian, Gustave Savy, James Seymour, Annette Sloly, Laurie Stansfield, Jonathan Taphouse, Matt Whittle


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