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Moving Beyond Your Divorce The most powerful stumbling block to moving beyond a divorce into a new life is the inability to accept your new reality. Acceptance is the hardest part of the divorce recovery process, and requires total honesty, courage and the willingness to let go of the life that no longer exists. Without that acceptance, we cannot move forward and create a new life. How do you learn acceptance? How do you move forward? How long should it take? Should you do it alone?

1) It’s

about you.

2) Get

One of the most powerful lessons in your life is the knowledge that you have control over one person and one person only…yourself. If you are looking outside of yourself to move forward, you won’t. You can’t change, nor do you have power anyone, but yourself. So turn inward and do the work on yourself and you will be able to effect dramatic and positive changes in your life. Being a victim means giving away all of your control and power. If you continue to blame someone else for your situation, then you are powerless to do anything about it because your choice to absolve yourself of any responsibility. So stop trying to change your ex, this is about YOU!

support.

If you think you can do this all by yourself ,you may be in for a big surprise. Getting support in any challenging endeavor leads to more success. Whether you choose a divorce support group, a therapist, a member of the clergy or a Life Coach, just do it. If you think that you have to handle life’s challenges on your own because somehow you equate support with weakness, it is not. It is the first step to move onward with your life.

3) Feelings,

facts and

interpretations.

The toughest part of a divorce is to get through the initial stages of a loss (assuming you believe it is a loss) that includes denial, grief, anger, depression and whatever else you might be feeling early

www.CarolinaGirl.sc Online Magazine | 2009 36

Carolina Girl Nov/Dec 2009 - Charleston Issue  

To read the current edition of the Charlston Issue of Carolina Girl Magazine visit http://charleston.carolinagirl.sc/

Carolina Girl Nov/Dec 2009 - Charleston Issue  

To read the current edition of the Charlston Issue of Carolina Girl Magazine visit http://charleston.carolinagirl.sc/

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