Sasee Magazine - July 2019

Page 13

After he finished with Lisa’s face – which looked like a rung in a totem pole – my group went to find our seats. Although a fair distance from the stage, they were set up on a platform high enough to provide not only a view of the show but the entire audience. There was an aisle right below us and our Hawaiian man walked by on his way backstage and tapped on the ledge in front of our table, hitting me with a dazzling smile. It was at that moment I knew I had made the connection I’d hoped for. I had made him feel like a person, and he had made me feel more than just a big girl.

Thinking about cosmetic surgery?

Halfway through the show the performers came down into the audience to select people to come up on stage to learn to Hula. As our man jumped down from the platform, I immediately turned to Marni and Lisa. “He’s going to come get me,” I told them. I knew this not because I felt that he wanted me, liked me, or because I was the most beautiful woman in the place. I knew he’d come for me because of the way I’d made him feel. Sure enough, he headed right for our table, came behind my seat and helped me out of it. I went freely, forgetting I hated the way I looked in my dress, and then there I was at the front of the stage, dancing in front of the entire luau. Back at my table, my two best friends told me how great I looked up there, and I had to admit I felt fabulous. I felt a certain vindication for the skinny girl I once was, who couldn’t leave her seat those many years ago, afraid to shine. In both bodies, I had been afraid to be seen, but in this larger one I had decided to take the risk, to be happy and be noticed. To be picked.

Rachel Remick

Born and raised in Philadelphia, Rachel Remick majored in Radio-Television-Film at Temple University before moving to Las Vegas, where she was employed at a popular live music venue on The Strip. Now a resident of Tampa, Florida, she co-owns a wholesale and online gift boutique. Both her fiction and narrative non-fiction stories have previously been published in several literary magazines, among them Bluestem, Rosebud and The First Line.

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