Sterling HigH ScHool | Volume 3 | iSSue 3 | Dec. 2016
PARA FIGHTS BREAST CANCER PG. 6
The star behind the scenes Pg. 5
Students take center stage Pg. 8
Sterling HigH ScHool |
More than a game
Pg. 12 | Dec. 2016
www.sterlingstudentpublications.com 308 E. Washington, Sterling, KS 67579 Phone: 620-278-2171 • Fax: 620-278-3237
EDITORS: • Dallas Lackey • Lexi Rose REPORTERS: • Will Duton • Lindsay Gilmore • McKiah San Miguel ADVISER: • Todd Vogts GRAPHIC ARTISTS: • SHS Graphic Design Class ADVERTISING SALES: • Sterling Publications Staff
POLICIES The Sterling High School Cub Reporter and all subsidiary publications are designated forums of free speech. The print edition is published October through May of each school year by the journalism class at Sterling High School. It is distributed for no charge throughout Unified School District 376 buildings and the Sterling community. The first copy is free. Subsequent copies will cost $1 per copy. For information about being added to the subscription list, contact Todd Vogts at 620-278-2171. Letters to the editor are welcome. Email them to firstname.lastname@example.org. All letters must be signed. Anonymous letters will not be printed. All letters subject to editing for legal, grammatical and factual reasons.
ABOUT THE COVER PHOTO Junior Sophie McNutt and her mother Loranne McNutt stand together against breast cancer. “I feel blessed,” Loranne said. “This has helped me realize that I want to do more for people. I always try to pay it forward. I pay more attention to the needs of others.” (Photo by Lucy Stansbury)
Technology benefits school The use of computers in school is steadily growing, making them a necessity. We see one-to-one computing beneficial for two reasons: it is more accessible and there is less of a reason for students to make excuses. Every student is capable of having or finding internet access to be able to complete unfinished school work. Offline access is also possible. For instance, Google Drive and Docs will allow you to have access to the apps without internet and will save your progress, which then gives the students ability to get their homework done. One-to-one computing also allows us to have a paperless environment. Meaning, we use Google Docs Drive, and Classroom, all of which are an available online access to students and allow an individual to share their work to their teacher. The need for printing off homework would be reduced, and give students the option to turn in their work via email. If each student has their own electronic device there would be less of a distraction while at school. There would be no reason to leave the classroom, because each individual should have their
device with them for in class work. We also find one-to-one computing necessary because we must put some thought into what is after highschool. We are a technology based society; having an electronic device allows us to be knowledgeable of what we may use in college. When attending college there are four basic technological skills you must have: typing ability, online etiquette skills, software knowledge, and online research skills. Due to the increasing use of computers in schools, as a publications staff who uses them every day, we find oneto-one computing necessary. Students should not be given the opportunity to have an excuse for unfinished homework. For both the students and teachers, it makes completing daily assignments less of a hassle and allows class time to be more focused on the task at hand. “If used appropriately for integration and such, it could be very powerful, and have a good impact,” Network Coordinator Dean Mantz said. — For the Editorial Board
BRIEFLY STATED Zero to Have you ever wondered about all the cool stuff going on around SHS, and then thought of all the unfortunate stuff to happen? Here’s your guide to all the hot, and cold, stuff going on at SHS.
“I am thankful for my grandmother’s stuffing. I look forward to it every year.”
JUNIOR ELIJAH MILLER, explains what he looked forward to the most at Thanksgiving.
Sophomores Max Dutton and Dylan Stewart volunteer at the Jacob Oden memorial fundraiser.
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“This is my last year playing iron man, and it makes playing and winning a little bittersweet,” senior Max Fulbright said.
Veteran’s Day honored
40 30 20 10 0 (Photos by Grace Rowland) Veterans stand and solute the American and Kansas flags during the Presentation of Colors during the Veteran’s Day assembly on Nov. 11.
Sterling HigH ScHool |
| Dec. 2016
Tech team aims to keep district current Will Dutton Technology at Sterling High School has been around about as long as Terry Robson, District Technology Coordinator has worked here, but that doesn’t mean he’s behind the times or not up to date on emerging technological trends. “In the past the majority of my day was spent repairing machines because we had more desktops than laptops. There were a lot of various machine problems,” Robson said. “As technology has advanced, more of my issues tend to be software-related, not hardware.” It seems newer technology has led to more frequent questions being asked. “Way more stuff has become available for teachers and students on the Internet as far as learning capabilities. I get a lot of questions such as, ‘Why won’t this movie play?’ from teachers, and ‘How come I can’t access this site?’ from the students,” Robson said. Students at SHS have the benefit of having many different outlets that come in the form of technology. Robson is accustomed to working with various forms of technology. “Our students and staff have multiple options here,” he said. “We have Chromebooks. We have PC laptops. We have Mac laptops. We’ve got desktops. In addition too smart boards and projectors are attached to them.” Though some people at Sterling High may seem less than satisfied with the technology, there seems to be reason to think more positively about the situation as the school continues to add more technology. “I’d say we’re probably pretty close in comparison to our league or area schools,” Robson said. “I wouldn’t say we’re miles ahead. In some areas we’re probably ahead. In others we’re probably a little behind. Overall, though, I’d guess we are very similar to those schools.” Robson and his coworker Dean Mantz, District Network
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Coordinator, suggest most devices don’t last very long. “Laptops and Chromebooks only have about a three to five year life in Mr. Mantz’ and my opinion,” he said. This puts even more emphasis on checking up on the technology from year to year. “Mr. Mantz and I look at replacing technology as we deem it to be getting old enough to replace,” Robson said. “We want the students working with fully functional technology.” While the idea of students bringing their own devices to school has been suggested, Robson sees it as something more problematic than beneficial. “There’s a lot more responsibility involved in allowing students to take devices home, certainly more risk in potential damage,” Robson said. “Mr. Mantz and I are pretty skittish about it. We aren’t sure what viruses, if any, students could be bringing to our network.” According to Robson, the school has more than enough devices. “If you look at the number of devices we have, we actually have more than one device in this building for every one student there is. With just computers we’re already close to one-toone,” he said. Robson expressed he feels the direction of technology in the district is headed down the right path. “I feel our educational learning environment with our current technology is going pretty well right now,” he said. “We have supplied what our educational culture needs.” Robson and Mantz collectively believe technology is something that is needed in today’s learning environment. “As students learn today and all the myriad of things that they can know and need to know about our world and what’s going on, technology has become vastly important,” Robson said. “Technology is definitely needed to thrive in our society.”
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ake a walk towards the high school locker rooms on any given day and you will likely see a swarm of athletes waiting for one person. Lori Dauer. Trainer, tape expert, ankle specialist; Call her what you will, but Lori is more than just the woman behind the scenes, she is “The 6th [Wo]man.”
“I like helping people. It sounds really cliche but it’s totally true,” Dauer said. “I get to be around sports all day and help people. That’s why I chose athletic training.” With her love for helping people and sports driving her passion for athletic training, Dauer has spent the last year and a half covering every sporting even that takes place at SHS, and she’s loved every minute of it. “I was actually surprised at how much I like it in the high school,” Dauer said. “I really love it.” Dauer’s knowledge of her field and experience in high school and college sports have made her a favorite among students. To her own surprise, Lori says that being around high school kids every day is one of her favorite
things about being at SHS. “As an athletic trainer, you’re there for the whole process,” Dauer said. “It’s not just this random kid. You have a personal relationship with your athletes. You don’t just send them on their way and forget about them. When I see a kid that I talk to every day and really get to know go down with a season-ending injury, that’s really hard for me.” Although Dauer is loving the little, hot room down the band hallway, she says she also wants to explore other options. “I’ve been very interested in a more clinical route. I would like to pursue it,” she said. “It will obviously depend on what opens up, but I’m also interested in teaching, so I’ll look at that too.” STERLING HIGH SCHOOL |
(Photo By Lindsay Gilmore) WWW.STERLINGCUBREPORTER.COM
| DEC. 2016
Let the blessings pour down Paraeducator gives her testimony on battling breast cancer Lexi Rose
During the summer of 2016, Loranne McNutt discovered an odd lump in one of her breasts. Thinking lightly of it, she went to the doctor to check up on things. On Sept. 12, McNutt’s test results came back positive. “It’s definitely been tough,” Loranne said. Having breast cancer is difficult, but it should be considered that it is hard for one to watch someone go through cancer. McNutt’s daughter, senior Sophia McNutt, is experiencing this. “I look at it like, ‘I have a short amount of time left with my mom’. I’ve definitely been looking towards the more negative side,” Sophia said. Since having a double mastectomy, a procedure that includes removing all the breast tissue, Loranne has had to be treated with chemotherapy to ensure the riddance of all cancer cells.
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“I am feeling a little light-headed from the chemo, but negative side effects were expected,” Loranne said. Despite the physical setbacks, Loranne has kept her mind focused on the humorous side of the situation. “The doctors have told me that I’m going to lose my Loranne McNutt hair,” she said. “Well, I figure I’ll rock bald like I rocked the hairnet.” According to Loranne, her goal to stay positive is fueled by inspiration. “It is scary, but I’m inspired by all the help I’m getting,” she said. “People really do care about me.” Loranne’s inspiration comes from a wide variety of people, all of whom are living in this community. “I grew up with the people in this community,” she said. “They’re surrounding me, supporting me through this. It definitely makes you appreciate a small town.” Being enveloped in a community that is as tight-knit as Sterling is, Loranne has reopened her eyes to what life truly is about. “The ‘I got this, you got this, we got this’ mantras really personify Sterling. You’re not alone here,” she said. “And, really anywhere you go, God has you in his hands.” During her trek through cancer, Loranne has been able to refine her faith. “It brings you closer to God,” Loranne said. “You can be angry at God, but ultimately, it’s God that gets you through it.” Looking towards her future, Loranne has set in plans she hopes to achieve. “I look forward to coming back to be a para for my students,” she said. “When this is all said and done, I need some ocean. There’s just something healing about it.” Loranne is grateful for all of the help that has been given to her, and expresses her thanks to everyone. “I really just want to say thank you to everyone,” she said. “Everyone has been a huge help. I truly am blessed.”
Seniors prepare for the next step Dallas Lackey “I haven’t given it much thought.” “I’ve got my senior year to figure it out.” These two statements are very common responses anyone could receive when asking a senior about college. Deciding where to go for college can be difficult, and it can be affected by an endless amount of variables, such as majors, dorm life, campus life, or even location. “I will most likely be headed to K-State in the fall,” senior Edward Weiner said about Kansas State University. “I chose K-State because it has one of the best engineering programs in the midwest, and I love the college atmosphere there, as there is a lot of small town kids there just like me.” Weiner won’t be the only Black Bear attending KSU next year. Senior J.J. Oden plans to enroll as well for similar reasons. “I’m going to go to K-State because of the fact it offers the major I want, and is affordable for me,” he said. “It is very exciting to think about the fact that I’m going to be living and going to school somewhere else in less than a year.”
While it could be easy to get lost in figuring out what you want to do with the rest of your life, and wasting away one’s last year in high school, our students seem to be making the most of the last year they get to spend as an active Sterling High School Black Bear. “It is easier for me because Anderson University’s campus is 16 hours away, but the main thing I’m focusing on is just staying in the moment,” senior Madeline Wagley said. Leaving behind the comfort of high school can be scary, possibly leaving behind everyone, and everything here in Sterling forever, is something that most would not like to thhink about no matter how much we understand that they have to. Regardless, deep down everyone will always be a Sterling High School Black Bear. “My friends and I don’t really dwell on the sad stuff,” Wagley said. “We know that we won’t see each other very often, but when we do, it’ll be way more special. We focus more on how excited we are for our future plans.”
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Sterling HigH ScHool |
| Dec. 2016
Secrets of Success
(Photo By Morgan Anderson) Junior Mia Stinemetz blows out her birthday candles during opening night of “The Secret Garden.”
SHS musical a success, shows growing talents Dallas Lackey
t seems as if every year the stories about the musicals all revolve around success. This year was no different. This year, Director Betsy Dutton took on “The Secret Garden”, based on the novel by Frances Hodgson Burnett. According to Dutton, it was a success. “I thought it went very well,” she said. “It is a very hard show to do because musically it is very difficult. Some high school students didn’t like it because it is very metaphorical and very symbolic, but by and large the adults did because it is so hard to pull off.” “The Secret Garden” uses multiple different symbols to get all the plot’s messages across, one of which being multiple actors representing different ghosts who are haunting the house. “I did a primer in the program to explain the ghosts just so everyone would get it, and while I don’t think everyone did, I think a lot of people did get it, and understand what was happening with the ghosts with, or without reading the primer,” Betsy said. Senior Lead will Dutton had this to said about the symbolic meaning behind the ghost actors. “I think most high schoolers undderstood it a lot better then we thought, and it made the show more enjoyable,” he said. The ghosts would be part of specific scenes, sometimes even interacting with the actors to further the plot. For the actors this provided a different feel than that of a normal part. “Being one of the dead people, you had to act in many different ways throughout the first act alone,” junior Aniston Ramsey said. “We had to act dark and mysterious.” While the acting proved to be difficult, Betsy gives praise to the musical side of the actors’ performance. “We had the vocalists to pull it off,” she said. “We had people who could sing the very difficult parts, and that caused people to enjoy the show more.” Senior lead Kyler Comley shared the same outlook as Betsy. “I will never forget the singing from this musical,” he said. “It was a ton of fun to do because we got to sing a lot and stretch our ranges.” Having good musicals could be considered a tradition in Sterling, and that doesn’t seem to be stopping anytime soon. “I saw plenty of growth,” Betsy said. “The fact that we had a lot of underclassmen acting out hard roles and singing them well shows nothing but growth.” The play was also highly condemned by those on the cast. “I was really proud of everyone,” Will said. “I was really impressed with (junior) Mia Stinemetz. She wasn’t really off stage for more than one or two scenes, and to carry that work load and be as cheery, on and off stage, as she was really portrayed her character well.” Will went on to discuss the upcoming of what he considered a surprise actor.
(Photos by Morgan Anderson) Junior Mia Stinemetz finally gets access to the garden during opening night of the show. “I felt like the only reason Mary had to be happy was the garden, so I put myself in her shoes, and tried to react accordingly to the garden,” Stinemetz said.
“One that I think stood out to everyone was (sophomore) William Weiner,” he said. “I think he sold his role really well. You could tell it was a fun roll for him and that he really enjoyed the singing. His duet with (junior) Katie Comley didn’t make me cry, but I definitely came close.” In a show as difficult as “The Secret Garden”, cast cooperation would be considered a must. “I think our cast really came together. You can tell we came
Sterling HigH ScHool |
| Dec. 2016
together show week,” Will said. “During my senior speech after the show, I couldn’t help but tell everyone how much I enjoyed them all, because we all had different talents. From my mom directing, to (junior) John Schweizer clocking in 40-plus hours on the set, it brought us to put on a show we can all be proud of.” When the lights go up, it all comes down to the execution from the entire cast. “Musicals are all about doing your job, so the next person can do there’s,” Comley said. “It takes a lot of us to put on a musical, and we all have to do our jobs, and I think we all did our jobs great.” Will had the same stance. “Top to bottom, everyone came together. The two weeks leading up to the show there were some tough moments from everyone, and we really toughed it and stayed up to par with the expectations we had for ourselves.” With seniors playing a few key roles, they seem to cherish the memories made and the feeling of finishing on a good note. “Just being out there with all my senior guys one last time made it an awesome experience,” Comley said. “I definitely won’t forget that.”
(Photos by Morgan Anderson) Junior Katie Comley sings “Clusters of Crocus” as the opening song to the musical. “It was a little nerve wracking being the first thing that the audience heard, but it was a really fun opprotunity,” she said.
(Photos by Morgan Anderson) Junior Alley Rowland, seniors Preston Nichols and Niki Dowell, freshman Bryson Brownlee, and junior Lauren Schueren sing “Final Storm” opening night of the show. The all-white costumes were worn by the actors potraying the dead. “I would say playing the dead is pretty similar to playing a regular character,” Nichols said. “It does, however, take away from interacting with other characters.”
(Photo By Morgan Anderson) Senior Will Dutton performs the song “I Heard Someone Crying” during “The Secret Garden.”
Sterling HigH ScHool |
| Dec. 2016
(File Photo) The boys varsity team huddles before the Hoisington game on Jan. 12. With the energizing senior encourgement graduated, the Black Bears look to an experienced senior class for leadership this season.
Boys basketball looks to build lasting relationships Mckiah San Miguel After a tough sub-state champion loss last season, all members of the boy’s basketball team have acknowledged their passion behind playing basketball. The loss has allowed the boys to grow closer as a family and set strong goal individual and team goals this season. “There is more to basketball than just the sport itself. We are hoping to build good chemistry with one another,” head boys basketball coach Derek Schneider said. Multiple players on the team have also expressed the same outlook. “The relationships I make during basketball is the reason why I play. Basketball is fun, but being a part of a team who you all have a relationship with is more than just fun,” senior Brady Ochs said. The players know that having a good relationship with each other makes for a well-playing team. “It affects me not only on the court, but off the court,” junior Lucas Briar said. “We have great chemistry. On the court we have a great bond and that translates into how well we play together.” For some players, goal-setting involves performance and
improvement as well as building relationships. “I hope to play JV as a freshman, and although I’ll play C team it would be a good accomplishment for me this season,” freshman Caleb Lambert said. Even though the goals and achievements set vary from player to player, they are still commonly shared and based on the same principles. “I would love to win sub-state with the boys who I’ve made close relationships with,” Briar said. Overall, the boys basketball team has high hopes for this year’s season. “Definitely going to state with my teammates would be my biggest goal for this season,” Ochs said. For most on the team, basketball has a deeper meaning than just the drills, techniques, and wins and losses of the game. “It’s about the guys coming together, building stronger relationships and friendships,” Schneider said. “It’s abuot working really hard, improving, experiencing failure, experiencing heartache, and still being able to persevere through all those things and become a better person.”
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Girls basketball sets goals, looks ahead at season Lexi Rose
Basketball season has officially began, and for many, there will be a number of obstacles to face. “I don’t know exactly who to put where yet,” girls head coach Jill Rowland said. “There is a lot of inexperience. “We need to focus on putting girls in the right places so we are successful.” Determining who to place in which position can be difficult, but Rowland looks forward to it. “I love the strategy of the game,” Rowland said. “I love figuring things out, like what we need to do and who we need to place where to be successful.” Despite her eagerness for working with strategy, Rowland has one main goal she is focusing on for this year’s season. “My personal goal is that we get better every day,” she said. “If you are involved and engaged in the process of getting better, the wins and losses will take care of themselves.” Likewise, senior Emma Horsch focuses on one main goal. “I want to set an example and start building up the new and younger players so we can secure our great program,” she said. Leadership, goal-setting, and team bonding are just a few of the ambitions the girls are focusing on this year. “I’m really looking forward to us seniors bonding with the younger classmen,” Horsch said. “Family bonding is something you lack when you don’t do other sports, and we’re really protective about our family. While looking ahead at this year’s season, players aren’t afraid of admitting improvement is needed. “As a team, we are going to have to run and be strong,” Horsch said. “We definitely aren’t the biggest team in this league, but I think us being faster can help us do well.” Overall, the girls basketball team is looking forward to what this season has in store. “I know we’re are looking forward to league,” Horsch said. “By winning league, we’ll be able to prove to everyone that we are worth more than just our size. We want to prove to others that we are worth something.”
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(File Photo) Girls basketball head coach Jill rowland cheers on Lady Black Bears after an official’s call was made in their favor during the first match of last year’s state tournament. “I am ready to see how the girls bond this year,” Rowland says.
It’s your party, but you can’t cry if you want to People are spread thin here. Almost all of us are involved in multiple activities, including sports, music, forensics, debate, scholars bowl, trapshooting, journalism, FBLA and many others. So it doesn’t give any of us the right to throw a pity party. Now, this might come across as a little harsh, but it’s something I feel that I need to get off my chest. If you ever want to get on my nerves, just stand next to me and complain about how hard your life is because you have to go to practice and do homework every night. There are people in this world that have three jobs, a house to clean, laundry to do, kids to take care of, and their own health to worry about. Chances are, you and your life as a high school student in Sterling is pretty easy compared to a majority of people in our world.
If you’re overwhelmed with all of the stuff you have to do, you have a two choices. One, choose to not be involved in more than you can handle. Or two, SUCK IT UP. Next time you’re feeling sorry for yourself because you had to stay up late to do your algebra homework, just think about those choices. No matter what you do, a pity party isn’t an option. I know people that work 60 hours a week at a minimum wage job just to take care of their children and don’t complain about it for one second. If you’re overwhelmed, don’t whine about it, fix it. Everything is a choice. Mr. Richter taught me that in economics. Make a choice that is right for you, and if you make the wrong one, it’s your own fault. Your life is your party, but you can’t cry if you want to. Suck it up or change it.
COLUMN BY LINDSAY GILMORE @LGilmore10
Coach Whisler’s well-earned curtain call
COLUMN BY WILL DUTTON @duttonwill
What is legacy? Is it fighting to keep a program you love dearly? Is it winning three state championships, as well as seven league titles? Possibly coaching a paralympian and Division one athlete? “The quality or number of athletes didn’t affect the way he coached,” longtime Sterling cross country assistant coach Larry Brownlee said. Dan Whisler, “The Running Bears” 26-year head cross country coach recently announced his retirement from cross country as well as track. “No matter where you came in day one, the goal was to progress forward. His coaching style has never changed,” said Brownlee. Having had the privilege to run for four years under Coach Whisler, or Coach Whis as most call him, I’ve learned a thing or two about improvement, goal-setting, and mental toughness. His comforting, yet assertive and consistent approach to long distance running Sterling HigH ScHool |
is inspiring. I’ll always remember making state cross country as a sophomore, that experience was unforgettable. I was running for a proud program and equally caring coach. The personal relationships he has developed with all his athletes is something they’ve cherished. What stands out to me is the fact that he never lost confidence in me. He was with me through the highs and the lowest of lows, even when I didn’t think I could get back to a competitive level. His friendly support truly goes beyond the classroom and at practice, it’s the type of man he is. The “Coach Whis” label will soon be gone, but the day-to-day relationships built, championship banners, and allaround quality man will never cease to be remembered when the time comes for him to walk into his new role — loving supporter of Grace and Layne.
| Dec. 2016
NOTE: Killer Serial Fiction is a part of Sterling Student Publications. It is the home of creative writing by Sterling High School creative writing students. Stories appearing here are works of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events or locales is entirely coincidental. These stories are presented for entertainment purposes only and are not intended to be read as being part of Sterling Student Publications news coverage. For more stories, visit www.sterlingstudentpublications.com/fiction.
Erlebnisse BY KATIE COMLEY
Continued from November 2016 . . . I was given six months with Angie on furlough, and we were married within the first two, renting out a small apartment in London. By the time he left again, I was six weeks pregnant with you. Your father was elated but agonized over the thought of having a pregnant wife and soon-to-be child in such times, but I was delighted by the fact that I would have something to remember him by why he was off fighting. He returned to his post in June 1916. It was four months later when I received the letter. I had been ill that day, pregnancy didn’t fare well with my body, and was dressed in only my house robe when there was a knock at the door. Horripilation refers to the feeling when one grows afraid or cold. Something about the tapping at our door signaled to the deepest part of my soul that there was danger outside. When I cracked the door open, there were two men, dressed in military fatigues, one holding a letter, the other, a small, folded Union Jack, which was what they gave when there was no body to return. Knowing already what the letter would say, I took it and told them coldly to leave. Within the envelope was a single sheet of paper, a slightly unique copy of what thousands of other women in London were receiving. It told me that Angie had been killed by the sinking of the SS Brantingham two days prior on October 4th, his ship sunk by a German torpedo off the Norwegian coast. There were no survivors. I was quite unsure of what to do with myself at that point, where to turn. I was now one of thousands of widows in England, left with a child to be born in little less than four months. To be quite frank, I wanted to start over. Words lost their charm after I saw how harsh and cold they could be in that letter, and I couldn’t bear to think of your father. Your grandparents, Angie’s mum and dad, were so gracious to me then; we had grown quite close when he was alive, but I found that I was avoiding them almost with an obsessive fervor, surrendering to hole up in the apartment most days and not venture out into the world. It’s not a lie when I tell you that I even hated you for some time. Hated what you stood for. I loathed the thought that you would be an everlasting reminder of the man who waltzed into that shop by the sea and stole my heart, and sank it to the bottom of the ocean
alongside him. You would serve only to remind me that my love had been drowned -- never again, it seemed, to breathe. Then you were born. After the four months of longing and hatred and heartache over losing your father, it was time to really see what the product of our short time together would be. While you do actually take after your father, which I’ve told you many times before, you did indeed turn out to be female, when I though you would be a boy. It wouldn’t have mattered to me, though, becasue the moment when I laid my eyes on you, I fell in love all over again. You were tiny and perfect and red mad when you came into the world. While you had my eyes, you have your father’s strong jaw, the mischievous smile that he won me over with. All my harbored anger for your father dying melted when I held you in my arms, and I knew that no matter what happened to him out at sea, Angie was still with me, in both my heart and yours. I took you home the day after you were born. Surprisingly, for as indisposed as I felt as I was carrying you, there were no complications in your birth. I like to think of it somehow as Angie’s parting gift. Your grandparents adored you, particularly your father’s side. They saw the same things in you that I saw, a glimpse of Angie and the life he wanted on shore. That said, you may not be aware of it, my darling, but it was then, before you could feed yourself or walk or speak when I learned from you the most. I remembered the way that Angie had thirsted for life and pursued it, and I decided to live my life the same way, raising you with that morale -- that when your story ends, you won’t regret the dreams that have ended. My story, darling, is coming to an end itself, and I don’t want you tomourn me. Remember me and learn from what I have taught you -- to love others and to love life, which is what you taught me, and to seek out your Erlebnisse. Hold me in your heart as I pass and continue in your life. And remember more than anything that I adore you more than the world.
With everlasting love, Mum
Published on Nov 30, 2016