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SPORTS QUIZ 1

Who was the latest Melbourne Victory player to suffer a serious injury?

2

With what pick was Richmond’s Dustin Martin selected with last season?

3 4

From which town was he recruited?

5

Who was the Aussie that won a silver medal in the men’s moguls final this week?

6 7 8 9

Who won the gold medal in the event?

10

Name the young Richmond player who injured his knee against the Hawks?

Etherington reveals all

Which Port Adelaide player was offered a one week suspension this week?

With what pick did the Bombers selected Andrew Lovett? Who won the group 1 Williams Reid Stakes at Mooney Valley? Who won the NR clash between the All stars and the Indigenous Stars?

Abbey shows her colours ABBEY Clancy, the partner of England footballer Peter Crouch posed for some new photos recently, this time wearing nothing but body paint. The shot was taken for Sports Illustrated and features some of the world’s hottest WAG’s.

FORMER West Ham United player Matthew Etherington recalled this week the extent of his gambling problems. He told how he would get on the team bus for a trip and gamble away his week’s wage of £20,000 throughout the trip. He remembers matches, too, but not for their results or his performances. Instead, he shakes his head at the times when the first thing he would do after getting out of the shower would be to turn on his mobile phone to check how the horses he had backed had run. “Looking back on it now, how can you prepare for a game when you are playing cards on the bus with lots of money changing hands?” he says. “It was silly.” As for those match-day horses, “I wasn’t even watching them run. That’s how stupid it was.” Thankfully for Etherington, he also remembers what he calls his ‘defining day’. It is the fateful moment that addicts can always remember those, that is, who are lucky enough to stop drinking, using drugs or gambling before their illness plays out its sickening endgame. “It was September 27 last year,” he says. Etherington had arrived home from training with his current club, Stoke City, to find his parents, Julie and Peter, sat round his kitchen table along with his sister, Hayley, and partner, Stephanie. Worry was etched on their faces.

They had known for a long time about his gambling but they did not know the extent. At one point, his debt reached £800,000, although part of that sum is now being disputed by his lawyers. Etherington reckons, however, that he has lost about £1.5million on greyhounds, horses and poker. “They asked me to lay everything on the table and I did,” he says. “They were all crying and I was emotional as well. They said, ‘We want to help you’”. “I had become very withdrawn, not the person my family knew. When you are a gambler, you are in another world, not really listening. You’re thinking about your next bet.”

ANSWERS: 1. Robbie Kruse 2. Pick 3 Overall 3. Bendigo 4. Daniel Motlop 5. Dale BeggSmith 6. Alexandre

Bilodeau 7. Pick 42 in the 2004 rookie draft 8. Turffontein 9. The Indigenous stars 10. Ben Nason

Poor bloke! A MAN who popped the question in front of thousands of fans at a US hockey game has been left humiliated after his would-be bride stormed off. The Valentine’s Day proposal was broadcast on a giant TV screen during an interval of the Rangers vs Lightning game at Madison Square Garden in New York, local media report. In a video of the embarrassing moment - posted on YouTube - the message, “Melissa, will you be my blueshirt bride? Love, Nick” flashes up on the big screen. The camera then zooms in on a couple in the stands. The woman, presumed to be Melissa, puts her hand over her mouth in apparent shock before stalking off shaking her head. Fellow Rangers fans then rally around a redfaced Nick, booing Melissa as she walks away. But the timing of the proposal on Valentine’s Day has prompted speculation it was actually a stunt staged by the couple. “I thought maybe it was staged because of Valentine’s Day ....was that real?”, Rangers player Erik Christensen was quoted by the New York Post as saying. The Bergen Record newspaper reported two unnamed Madison Square Garden sources as saying the proposal was a hoax. The sources told the newspaper stadium officials had believed the proposal was real when they put it on the big screen

This has gone too far DONALD Bradman is without doubt one of Australia’s greatest ever sportsman. He did it all on the cricket field and it now seems as though he has done it all off the field as well. Since his passing away, it seems as though people are still trying to make a buck out of his name. Check out this CD that has just been released. Titled Don Bradman: The Music He Loved, the CD is filled with old songs that the great batsman loved.

Ireland goes fishy... SOCCER bling king Stephen Ireland really has gone off the deep end - spending £100,000 on a giant fish tank. The big-buying Man City star had the huge feature installed as part of a refit of his £5million

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mansion. The four-metre tank holds 6,000 litres of saltwater - 75 times more than an average aquarium - and contains 500 tropical fish. It even includes a reef from Fiji, an in-built computer to monitor temperature and is fitted with wi-fi so it can be operated from anywhere in the world. All the technical parts are hidden in cabinets and the water is pumped through underfloor pipes from a separate room. Midfielder Ireland, 23, who earns £70,000 a week, said, “It’s just breathtaking.” “When people come to the door and see it their first reaction is, ‘Wow’!” The tank is made of commercial acrylic instead of glass, tough enough to withstand being accidentally hit by a ball from the personalised pool table next to it.

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THESE babes prove you can be hot and cold at the same time. Dozens of the world’s sexiest seasonal sportswomen are in Vancouver for the Winter Olympics. Here are some of our favourites.

L I N D S AY V O N N

THE girlfriend of Man City star Stephen Ireland has spoken out in defence of WAGs - claiming it’s wrong to assume they have no ambition. Jessica Lawlor, 24, denied their extravagant lifestyles meant they had an “easy life” and insisted that looking after the couple’s three children kept her busy. Jessica, who counts Man United’s Wayne Rooney and Wes Brown as neighbours, said, “I think the whole WAG thing is a bit ridiculous.” “It’s started to get used as a harsh term, they say if you’re a WAG you do nothing or just go shopping all the time and that’s not the case at all.” She added, “My day starts at 7am doing the school runs. We don’t have a nanny so there are three children to look after”. “When people see the cars and house they say you have an easy life, but any mother of three young kids will know that in itself is not an easy job - money doesn’t change that.” Jessica cares for her and Stephen’s 18month son Jacob, and his children from a previous relationship, Joshua, five and Jessica, three. She hit the headlines after being photographed in a gaudy, £264,000 red and white Bentley that Stephen gave her for her birthday last year. She said she didn’t care what people thought of the car, which she described as “actually quite classy”. The couple met in their home town of Cork, in Ireland, and Jessica described how Stephen, 23, flew out to the US to woo her after she’d gone there to live for a while. She said, “I don’t think you can get any more romantic than that.”

Hot and Cold

ANNI FRIESINGER

Not easy being a WAG is it?

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www.heartbalm.com.au


The Next She-Male Idol

Vibrating Ice Massager

Throat Injection 2

Studio: Evil Angel Category: Fetish Genre: Transsexual Stars: Dany De Castro, Jo Garcia, Labelly Sandorram, Raissa Run Time: 2hrs 52minutes Number Of Discs: 1 Bonus Features: Interactive Menus,Chapter Selection, Website Information, Slide Show, Trailers, Cum Shot Recap DIRECTED by Joel Silvera, The Next She-Male Idol is the latest of many films starring chicks with dicks. The world’s foremost purveyor of she-male pornography launches a sizzling new title with this film, a fabulous collection of six of Brazil’s most alluring chicks with dicks, all out to prove why they and no other deserve the ... Full Descriptioncrown. Will it be Jo Garcia and her huge dick, Anna Paula Samadat with her lactating breasts, or maybe mistress of the three-way Dany De Castro? By the end of the video, you’ll find out! This is Amanda Close’s one and only video, while a variety of other adult stars also making their debut in this video such as Arthur Nevada, Raissa Nevada and Labelly Sandorron.

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These girls are all quality and would be chased around all night by straight guys if out at a bar. You really wouldn’t know that they are packing a little something extra until you get them home and out of their clothes. In regards to bonus features, The Next She-Male Idol contains a photo gallery, film trailers, cast lists and filmographies and everyone’s favourite, a cumshot recap. Naturally this film won’t appeal to everyone however if you are a fan of chicks with dicks or girls with that extra something special then The Next She-Male Idol will definitely appeal to you. VERDICT:

Studio: Jules Jordan Video Category: Gonzo Genre: Oral, Blowjobs, Cumshots, Deep Throat Director: Alexandra DeVoe Stars: Blu Diamond, Brian Pumper, Brown Sugar, Cali Davenport, Carmen Michaels + many more Run Time: 2hrs 59minutes Number Of Discs: 2 Bonus Features: Interactive Menus, Cumshot Recap + more

EVER felt so damn hot you needed to cool down? Then you’ll love this, the world’s first vibrating ice massager. Seduce your partner with this diamond of ice, forcing them to melt into lust. The Touché Ice Massager is an innovative new concept. It’s refreshing effect will turn your world upside down, but won’t cool down your sex life. The user friendly grip is made from silicone, makes it easy to use in jus about every position. The vibrating bullet is replaceable meaning it will bring you passion for years to come. You can enjoy the Touché Ice Massager both ways. Firstly there is its thrilling, icy touch

and secondly it’s unique silicone sensation that you would have never experienced before. I found the experience between hot and cold to be a fantastic, so I recommend that you go out and grab yourself a Vibrating Ice Massager. Don’t forget that it’s always great to try new toys on a regular basis but don’t ever force your partner into something you want them to do. Always practice safe sex. VERDICT:

DIRECTED by Alexander Devoe and starring Cali Davenport, Throat Injection 2 features Davenport, a big booty cutie, sucking and swallowing in her first blow bang! Misty Stone, a sexy brown skinned honey swallows man juice for the first time while Carmen Michaels, a super nympho gets the gangbang treatment and guzzles multiple loads in her first blow bang and dick feast! Meanwhile Blu Diamond, an 18 year old nympho begs for dicks down her throat and deep in her pussy! while Brown Sugar and Chyanne Jacobs swallow cum for the first time on camera. If you after plenty of hardcore penetration then perhaps you should look elsewhere as Throat Injection 2 is more about oral fun although there is some pene-

tration throughout the film. In regards to bonus features, Throat Injection 2 contains a photo gallery and a cumshot recap, which naturally in a film like this lasts for quite some time. Overall not the kind of film you want to be showing off to your girlfriend or wife as let’s face it, it isn’t exactly aimed for a female audience now is it. Considering Throat Injection 2 is an extremely long film and contains a similar act on each scene, the film does gets somewhat repetitive. However if you are into this sort of thing then Throat Injection 2 may just be the film for you. VERDICT:

HEARTBALM, FEBRUARY 18-24, 2010 –

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H e a r t b a l m

L OV E

L E T T E R S ♥

L OV E

experience and more importantly confidence in yourself before setting the world alight. If you are struggling for some form, just drop back into the reserves for a week or two (I’m talking about the clubs with younger girls) and regain your confidence amongst weaker opposition. Good luck mate.

I just want to get married

Milf hunting

Heartbalm writes: Mate. Chill out and relax. You’re only 33. Enjoy youth while you can, don’t stress about getting married. Surely the girl will come to you, whatever you do don’t go around looking to get married out of fear. That can’t be healthy and will only lead to you landing fat women in a midlife crisis. And if you don’t get married don’t stress either, most single people will tell you it’s the only way to be.

Young love Mr DL is 23 and loves the younger ladies. He writes: My mates younger brother has become a DJ and is starting to get some regular gigs around some of Melbourne’s best night spots. Naturally I have been attending his gigs as the drink

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Mr WP is 25 and had a blast with the old ladies. He writes: I went to an over 28’s club last weekend (don’t ask me how I got in) and I have to admit that I had a ball. I am writing in to all young men to head out to these older venues as it’s a meat market and luckily for us, it’s our meat that all the ladies are after. Instead of going out to regular clubs and spending all night and all your cash chasing the girls, do yourself a favour and take my advice as the ladies at the older clubs are the ones doing the chasing. All you have to do is hit the dance floor and move to the beat and by the end of the night I guarantee you that you will have someone on your meat. All these ladies are looking for toy boys and as soon as you get over the idea that most of these girls are married, you will have a blast. cards he receives are simply too good to pass up. His crowds are generally young, which is just fine by me. There are plenty of young sluts around, looking for someone to show them a good time. Thanks to my age, and more importantly experience, the young sluts are lining up to have a piece of me. I must admit that I’m loving it. However there is a problem. Whenever

H e a r t b a l m

my usual friends go out, I don’t seem interested anymore since the places they go have crowds that are generally our age. To these girls I am nothing special, just another guy trying to get a root. How can I convince or even fool these girls my age into thinking that I’m great? Heartbalm writes: Think of it like playing AFL football. You need to get some

L OV E

L E T T E R S ♥

Mr MW is 33 and he is worried he’ll never fall in love. He writes: I have had a series of non-series girlfriends over the past two decades. I think I like them and then the better I get to know them the less I want to be around them. As I was sitting at a mates wedding the other day I got to thinking. What if this never happens to me? What if I never fall in love and get married? I’m really starting to panic and I want to know how I can find the right girl.

L OV E

H e a r t b a l m

Heartbalm writes: I don’t think you can continue to do these things without losing your boyfriend. Yet we think that’s a good thing, as you should be doing the things that you enjoy.

H e a r t b a l m

Ms RG is 22 and her boyfriend is unhappy with her behaviour. She writes: I am what you may consider a little wild, I love to party and I love my body. I work hard on my body, I diet, I workout and regularly go to solariums. My fondness of my body leads to me showing it off, especially after a few drinks. I love doing it and the boys, and sometimes even the girls, love it when I do. The problem is my boyfriend of three months cracks the shits whenever I show my assets. He says, “Only he should be seeing those things.” I reckon that is crap, yet I am worried we are going to break up over it. Last weekend at a party I got up on the table and stripped naked, it was great feeling and everybody cheered wildly, but after I did it he threatened to dump me. How can I continue to party how I want to without losing him?

L E T T E R S ♥

Just wanting to party

Heartbalm writes: Well it sounds like you have it all worked out. If your just looking for someone to have fun with and someone to teach you a trick or two then these older venues are a gold mine. However if you are looking for a quality young girl to start a relationship with then I suggest you just stick to regular clubs.

L E T T E R S ♥

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★ G A Z I N G AT T H E S TA R S , T I T S , G L I T Z , ★ A double Decker WELL, here she is, your 2010 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue Cover Model: Brooklyn Decker. And there couldn’t be a more obvious choice. Not that I have anything against Brooklyn Decker. She’s ridiculously hot, and is a good choice. It’s just that, like the rest of the issue, it’s painfully obvious. I hate to say it, but after all the hype, I’m actually pretty disappointed overall. Maybe it’s because they wouldn’t shut up about it on Twitter, but this year’s issue feels off. Last year’s was incredibly sexy.

What a  family... KHLOE Kardashian apparently understands the true meaning of Valentine’s Day, via Amy Grindhouse. Khloe said, “Like a solo sex tape, like masturbation.” Her friend halted the idea of seeing Khloe diddle herself on camera, saying, “I am not going to video tape you, masturbating.” Khloe responded, “It could be like this”, as she held out one hand like she was holding a camera and the other covering her eyes. She added, “You know, I kind of like the idea of a sexy little video. I could be naughty.”

Heidi’s nipple shot.... IF these Heidi Klum topless pictures from the February issue of DT magazine look a little familiar to you, that’s because they’re from the same set of photos as those Heidi Klum nude pictures from the book Heidilicious by Rankin. However, there are some new pictures that we’ve never seen before. Including the cover shot which features Heidi Klum in a see-through wet shirt. Yes, that’s some Heidi Klum nipple, right there

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★ G A Z I N G AT T H E S TA R S , T I T S , G L I T Z , ★ Move your hands yeah I DON’T watch Fringe, however if they had Anna Torv topless in first episode, I might have stuck around. She wasn’t though. And I just couldn’t get past the fact that Pacey from Dawson’s Creek is now some para-

normal FBI investigator or something. So yeah, I don’t watch the show. But I would like to see Anna Torv naked. At least Esquire magazine got her to take her top off. Now if only they could get her to move her bloody hands.

Heidi’s ready to go nude HEIDI Montag is negotiating a second spread for Playboy and this time around she’s willing to make it less Jesus-friendly because, goddamn, fake tits cost are expensive. Via The Scoop: “She is currently speaking with (Playboy photographer) Matthew Rolston (about) a steamy, soapy, shower concept showing her boobs through the shower door,” said the source. “The figure being discussed for the exclusive is in the seven figures.” “She could use the money, and she’s

finally ready to pose topless, so she is negotiating with the magazine,” according to one of Montag’s friends, who spoke to In Touch Weekly. I wonder if the first time it was less about her Christian values, which she’s since bailed on for yoga gurus, and more about Heidi legitimately being afraid to show her old body naked. Then again, she pranced around in a bikini every other day, how frightening could her nipples have been?

Nude models no. 1

McMenamy nude, Jeneil nude, and Alessandra Ambrosio, Miranda Kerr, Izabel Goulart, Devon Aoki, and Emily Didonata not nude, but still sexy. Yeah, that’s a lot of naked supermodels. Pics below.

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K AT E M O S S

LARA STONE

NAOMI CAMPBELL

ISSUE three of Love magazine is out, and it just happens to feature Kate Moss nude, Naomi Campbell nude, Lara Stone nude, Daria Werbowy nude, Natalia Vodianova nude, Amber Valletta nude, Kristen

HEARTBALM, FEBRUARY 18-24, 2010 –

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YOU GOTTA BE JOKING! bet on that day and won $100. She seemed quite happy with the explanation and he went off to work. When he got home that night, his wife had the shits with him again. Asking her what the matter was now, she replied “Your horse phoned.”

Learn Chinese in 5 minutes 1) That’s not right. Sum Ting Wong 2) Are you harbouring a fugitive? Hu Yu Hai Ding 3) See me ASAP. Kum Hia Nao 4) Stupid Man. Dum Fuk 5) Small Horse. Tai Ni Po Ni 6) Did you go to the beach? Wai Yu So Tan 7) I bumped into a coffee table. Ai Bang Mai Fa Kin Ni 8) I think you need a face lift. Chin Tu Fat 9) It’s very dark in here.Wao So Dim 10) I thought you were on a diet. Wai Yu Mun Ching? 11) This is a tow away zone. No Pah King 12) Our meeting is scheduled for next week. Wai Yu Kum Nao? 13) Staying out of sight. Lei Ying Lo 14) He’s cleaning his automobile. Wa Shing Ka 15) Your body odor is offensive. Yu Stin Ki Pu 16) Great. Fa Kin Su Pah

During a course in human sexuality, the instructor was discussing various items in the Kinsey report. The class members gasped audibly when the instructor read out that a woman had several hundred orgasms in a single session. A male voice said, “Wow, who was she?” A female voice followed with, “The hell with that... Who was HE?’”

A Lebanese man arrives in Sydney as a new immigrant to Australia. He stops the first person he sees walking down the street and says, “Thank you Mr. Australian for letting me in this country, and giving me housing, money, free medical care and free education!” But the passer-by says, “You are mistaken, I am Russian” The man goes on and encounters another passer-by. “Thank you for having such a beautiful country here in Australia!” The person says, “I no Australian, I Vietnamese.” The new arrival walks further, and the next person he sees he stops, shakes his hand and says, “Thank you for the wonderful Australia!” That person puts up his hand and says, “I am from Middle East , I am not an Australian!” He finally sees a nice lady and asks suspiciously, “Are you an Australian? She says, “No, I am from New Zealand!” He is puzzled, and asks her, “Where are all the Australians?” The Kiwi lady looks at her watch, shrugs, and says, “Probably at work!”

A guy goes down for breakfast and it is quite obvious that his wife has the shits with him. He asks what is the matter. She replies, “Last night you were talking in your sleep and I want to know who Linda is?” Thinking quickly on his feet he tells her that Linda was ‘Lucky Linda’ and was actually a name of a horse that he

A bear, a lion and a chicken meet. Bear says, “If I roar in the forests of North America, the entire forest is shivering with fear.” Lion says, “And if I roar on the great plains of Africa, the entire savannah is afraid of me.” Says the chicken, “Big deal. I only have to cough, and the entire planet wets itself.”

Osama bin Laden and one of his followers were riding on a camel when they stopped at a small town. Bin Laden gets off the camel and lifts up its tail and looks at the camel’s butt, just then a guy comes over and says, “What are you doing?” Osama replies, “About 2 miles back I heard someone say, ‘Hey, look at the two assholes on that camel.’”

Osama is worried about his future and calls Miss Cleo for advice. She said, “Osama it does not look good at all you are going to die! Osama nervously asked, “When, When will I die?” Miss Cleo said, “It will be on an American holiday”. “Which American holiday?” Miss Cleo said, “It doesn’t matter.” “When you die it will be an American holiday.”

The mother-in-law stopped unexpectedly by the recently married couple’s house. She rang the doorbell and stepped into the house to see her daughter-in-law standing naked by the door.’ “What are you doing?” the mother-in-law asked. “I am waiting for my husband to come home from work,” the daughter-in-law replied.

Robber tries to hold up closed bank A hapless bank robber fled empty handed when he turned up at the branch - on early closing day. Baffled staff - taking part in a training session - watched in amusement as he hammered on the door with his gun demanding to be let in, say police in Kirchheim, Austria. The would-be crook who was caught on camera wearing his Barack Obama mask - eventually fled to his getaway car empty handed. “We thought it was part of the training, some sort of initiative test, or a joke. Laughing only seemed to make him more angry,” said one worker. Although closed the staff were still in the bank as they were taking part in the after hours training session. Police said the Barack Obama raider was about 1.75 metres tall and dressed in a dark jacket with red stripes on its sleeves, dark jeans and dark gloves. A bank spokesman said: “He wasn’t very smart - the bank was robbed both last December and in January this year and we now have really tight security.”

Bride’s beard irritates groom An Arab ambassador had his marriage annulled after discovering his

10 – HEARTBALM, FEBRUARY 18-24, 2010

“Why are you naked?” asked the mother-in-law. “This is my love dress,” the daughter-in-law replied. “LOVE DRESS! You are naked,” said the mother-in-law. “But my husband loves it when I wear this dress. It makes him happy and he makes me happy,”said the daughter-in-law. “I would appreciate you leaving now because my husband will be home any minute,” the daughterin-law continued. Soured by all of this romantic stuff, the mother-inlaw left. On the way home, she thought about the ‘LOVE DRESS’ and got an idea. She undressed, showered, applied her best perfume, and waited by the door for her husband to come home. Finally, the pickup truck drove up the drive way, and she took her place by the door. The father-in-law opened the door, and immediately saw his wife naked by the door. “What are you doing?” he asked. “This is my love dress,” she replied. “Needs ironing,” he replied.

Ted and his wife were working in their garden one day when Ted looks over at his wife and says, “Your butt is getting really big, I mean really big! I bet your butt is bigger than the barbecue.” With that he proceeded to get a measuring tape and measure the grill and then went over to where his wife was working and measured his wife’s bottom. “Yes, I was right, your butt is two inches wider than the barbecue!!!” The wife chooses to ignore her husband. Later that night in bed, Ted is

veiled wife-to-be had a beard and was cross-eyed. The diplomat had only met the woman a few times, during which she had hidden her face behind a niqab, reports The Sun. After the marriage contract was signed, the man tried to give his new wife a smooch only to find she had facial hair, reports local media. The ambassador told an Islamic Sharia court in the United Arab Emirates that he was tricked into the marriage. He claimed the woman’s mother had shown his own mother pictures of her sister instead of her, the report said. He demanded the contract be annulled and also called for the woman pay to him back nearly £90,000 for clothes, jewellery and other gifts he had bought her. The court annulled the contract but rejected the ambassador’s demand for compensation. The report did not identify the ambassador nor give any further details.

Bull turns tables on tiger A Chinese zoo’s bid to restore a tiger’s natural instincts by putting a live bull in its cage backfired when prey turned hunter. Yancheng Zoo, in Changzhou, Jiangsu province, put the one-year-old bull into

feeling a little frisky. He makes some advances towards his wife who completely brushes him off. “What’s wrong?” he asks. She answers, “Do you really think I’m going to fire up this bigass grill for one little weenie?”

A man wonders if having sex on the Sabbath is a sin because he is not sure if sex is work or play. He asks a priest for his opinion on this question. The priest says after consulting the Bible, “My son, after an exhaustive search I am positive sex is work and is not permitted on Sundays.” The man thinks, “What does a priest know of sex?” He goes to minister, a married man, experienced, for the answer. He queries the minister and receives the same reply. “Sex is work and not for the Sabbath!” Not pleased with the reply, he seeks out the ultimate authority, a man of thousands of years tradition and knowledge. A Rabbi. The Rabbi ponders the question and states,” My son, sex is definitely play.” The man replies,” Rabbi, how can you be so sure when so many others tell me sex is work?” The Rabbi softly speaks, “If sex were work, my wife would have the maid do it!”

the white tiger’s enclosure, reports Modern Express. Keepers expected the rare tiger, called Tang Bai Hu, would kill and eat the animal as it would have done in the wild. Tang Bai Hu did try to attack the bull but the bull turned the tables by charging the tiger which fled in terror, much to the amusement of visitors. The tiger tried again but could not get the better of the bull which pushed him away and, at one stage, even seemed to bite the tiger back. Zoo spokesman Chang Yihai admitted that a live bull might have been too much for the 15-year-old tiger which normally eats chopped beef or chicken. “Our tigers’ hunting skills are long forgotten. They live a very comfortable life here, with a big house, swimming pool and sports field,” he said. “But their wild nature has been lost, which indirectly causes the degeneration of their immune system and reproductive ability.” The zoo had not given up - but would try offering Tang Bai Hu live chickens next time and build up from there, he added. Tang Bai Hu is the zoo’s only adult white tiger. He and his two cubs, Charles and Harry, are the stars of the zoo’s big cat show.

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★ SPECIAL ★ SPECIAL ★ SPECIAL ★

NAUGHTY TIMES (Nt Club) Girls & Trannies. 1309 North Rd., Huntingdale Ph: (03) 9544 4433 pca 5231b

Romantics

9696 9199

UNDER NEW MANAGEMENT PCA 7043B

(02) 9906 2799

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TALIA

3 Leslie Crt, Burwood

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9305 3473

Lucy

1/2 hr

● Open 10am till very late 7 Days ● Best service in town

A Sexy Young Lady with a Size 6 Body. & Big Boobs Best Fun

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● Appointments welcome

10 Fulton St Oakleigh

PCA 6072B

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9543 5901 PCA 5531B

SONIA

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PCA 6072B

P.C.A. 6261BE

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9305 3473

THE

PCA 6072B

G

★Rosi★

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.net.au

ALL NEW 77 Racecourse Road North Melbourne Services from $65

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Older and Bolder Deliciously Wicked Ladies from 30 to 70+ years

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Advertisements are accepted on the understanding the advertiser indemnifies Heartbalm from all claims arising therefrom.

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PCA458BE

44 Gladstone St. South Melbourne

Advertisements are accepted on the understanding the advertiser indemnifies Heartbalm from all claims arising therefrom.

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Phone:

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(

)

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Present this ad $10 Discount

PCA 6143B

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The Bignell

BISEXUAL MEN

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0458 250 482

MALE TO MALE

PHONE SERVICES

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PCA 6059XE

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9696 2222

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PCA 6861XE

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PHONE:

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9543 5901

Pca 818b

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PCA 6072B PCA 5531B

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PCA 5109BE

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CALL JON 03 9620 1 166

(

)

14 – HEARTBALM, FEBRUARY 18-24, 2010

Advertisements are accepted on the understanding the advertiser indemnifies Heartbalm from all claims arising therefrom.

See your

ad on the

Web

at

www.heartbalm.com.au www.heartbalm.com.au


DOMINATION & ADULT SERVICES

Correction Centre

★Mistress Lauren★ Sexual Domination

With many years behind her in the lifestyle scene & now also well established as a pro-Domme, Mistress Lauren has all the versatility that BDSM & fetish have to offer. Whether you are after a light, playful roleplay or something seriously heavy, Mistress Lauren is an adept Mistress who will leave you breathless & ALWAYS wanting more... Bi-sexual, vivacious, imaginative, mischievous & wickedly kinky she awaits you...

the chambers of sensual elegance

Melbourne’s Leading Fetish & Fantasies Establishment est. 1995

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Specialising in The Creative Artform of Bondage & Discipline

Mistress Ambrosia

Novices & first-timers are welcome. PRIVATE & DISCREET DUNGEON HIRE OR FANTASY ROOM HIRE AT MELBOURNE’S BEST RATES

Available Mon, Tues & Fri 11am till late Ph: (03)

9544 8384

www.fetishhouse.com.au

1 EDINBURGH ST, OAKLEIGH STH

pca4228be

11am Till Late

Mistress Lola

182 Rose St Fitzroy Melbourne www.thedominasrealm.com Mon to Fri 11am to 11pm & Sat 2pm to 7pm

Ph: 03 9419 8347

20 St. David St., Fitzroy correctioncentre.com

PCA 3850BE

GOING TO THE BALL, WELL YOU WILL NEED NEW SHOES THEN WON’T YOU???

WALK ALL OVER ME GET YOUR SHOES FROM

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Discontinued & 1 off styles 50-70% Off

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Dancers required by

GEELONG GENTLEMEN'S CLUB ★ Full training & Pole dancing lessons by friendly management Huge $$. ★ Great facilities ★ Free accommodation Enjoy a lovely weekend in Geelong & have lunch on the waterfront or a nice drive down the coast during the day. ★ Only a 45 min drive or 1hr by train.

It’s a Paid Holiday

Ph: (03) 52218439 www.heartbalm.com.au

ORIENTAL TOUCH Full body relaxation massage and Thai traditional massage. Male & Female masseurs available. Booking essential. Email

massage@orientaltouch.com.au 0r call 9818 6249 COLLINGWOOD AREA

(03)

9510 9993

www.shoecraft.com.au

Some pre-loved stock available

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BIANCA

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on the

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BLACK OPAL 9792 3008

PCA 194BE

CATWOMAN

DROP IN AND SEE OUR FRIENDLY STAFF THEY WILL LOOK AFTER YOU AT ★ Dandenong’s Finest Brothel ★ Dandenong’s Best Prices ★ Offering The Best Service LADIES, LADIES, LADIES ALL ARE WELCOME

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Open for Inspection 10 am-4 am 7 Days

12 DANDENONG STREET DANDENONG HEARTBALM, FEBRUARY 18-24, 2010 –

15


Horny ORIENTAL Girls ANGELS 15 George St Blackburn Get into the action with me

Call Now:

1902 213 207 $4.95 min (inc GST) Higher from Pay/Mob

Young Beautiful Girls Everyday NEW GIRLS AVAILABLE Special from

$65

10am – Late

Tel:

9877 3123 Mel 48 A9 PCA 6374B


Heartbalm 18-24 February 2010