Feature
What do men
SPOKE, December
2002
2,
— Page 9
want?
really
By NICOLE CHILDS
the decision should also be based
how much each person makes. One of the biggest things women often wonder about men is if they
on This
the first
is
a two-part
in
women
about men and
series
in
can
relationships.
them. Will they be the
trust
type of guy to cheat or will they be
One of
the greatest mysteries in
women
gossipy
are
faithful
creatures
obsessed with chocolate and the
women,
of their thighs. To
size
men
are beer-guzzling animals
ogle
them and
cars
and
The
who
about
talk constantly
sports.
question
big
most
in
heads is what do men really want? What do men think about the way we act, relationships
women
and us
in general.
down
sat
1
s
with five
cover what exactly
it
men
is
to dis-
they want.
The following answers may shock you. My participants were: Dave Roy and Mike Ryan, both secondbusiness
year general
students;
(Photo by Nicole Childs)
(From left) Kevin Kerry, Eric Melanson, Mike Ryan, Justin Dautner and Dave Roy discuss the ups and downs of relationships.
Justin Dautner, a third-year materi-
management
als
Kevin
student;
Kerry, a third-year computer engi-
neering technology
and
student,
Eric Melanson, a third-year
wood
technology student. Like women, men want respect. They want to feel free to live their own lives and not be judged by the way they choose to do it. \^en asked what annoys them about women, Roy said. Girls who expect romance and a phone call everyday and too much commitment away.
right
Ryan
and
emotional sometimes, questions
don
t
like girls that
don
give
his friends lives.
When men and women
argue,
According to Melanson and Dautner, men can t stand the way that women bring up things from the past that were
they do so differently.
already resolved.
Melanson said, I hate it when they drag something on, forget about it and then bring it up later on.
Some of the stereotypes that women are labeled with do seem to annoy men. All five men laughed as they joked about how women can spend every other day at the mall and how some are bad drivers. One thing they get annoyed with
when
girls
know what
but are afraid to
go
for
they want
it.
Men
feel
sometimes they are expected to do t mind them what they want rather than make them guess. Sometimes with girls you can
everything,
would
girl
and wouldn
if a
just tell
they want to do something, or
tell
want something, but they expect you to make all the moves and do everything, said Roy. Ryan had another view. His main annoyance comes from girls he I
1
jA
deems attention whores. He used an example of a girl who attended at thf jWalloween Biz Bash Coil*oga College wearing practiI
jV
cally nothing to attract attention. j
I ,
They
back to back with a group of guys they 11 suddenly say. Yeah, I really need some sex or something loud like that, and all they want is attention, added Ryan. However, the five of them said this type of woman is still better than one
different
you
Sex. for like
one over you and you ask
hate attention whores, those
interior,
As
added.
a
With all the things they don t like women, its a wonder they want them at all. So what exactly are they looking for in a woman? Deep down, what they want is a
making
woman who
will be their Ifiend,
attracts
and someone who will take care of them. As much as they protest that they want their independence and not to have their
Women
is
secretly
like
when
a girl can
I
make
like to
m
and not be ashamed Wliile they like the initiative
to
all
times,
witli her,
will
He
was a hot
thing
you
topic
are attracted
Roy. He also Melanson wants a girl who doesn t always is spontaneous and expect dinner and flowers. He d like a girl to surprise
times and do things he
him some-
as he said,
1
woman
it
attracts
out
at
dressed
him but
it
can give off the wrong impression. Girls can be revealing but classy at the same time. That s what 1 look for,
times.
womens They
say,
Well,
saying.
That
whom? Do men
see it as overconfident or pushy, or do they like it
approaches them? Dautner said he likes it both ways. me. I love it when a girl approaches
when
Not
a
said
don
clothing that
t
under-
some-
they find
woman
that
is
bring up something she did a
week
to
I
dont
like
approaching
When
light up.
When asked to describe their idea of the perfect man date, they wanted a woman to take them to a hockey game, play golf with them or go see a concert. Kerry said, he would like to go to a steak house and then a football game. Tliey said the best things girls can do on a date are pay, carry the conversation and plan
pick-up line, women often attempt it, but not always successfully. Ryan said a woman tried to pick
him up by
at a party
on his and saying
sitting
lap
would
What
meeting people, they said they re more comfortable meeting women
They said they don t mind the
through their friends. If you re looking for a
pick-up lines as girl for a
definitely
through
friends,
said Dautner and laugh-
ingly added.
The grocery
store is
too.
Another big question in the dating world is who should pay? If you are out at a restaurant should he pay or should she? Or should it be split 50/50? them to 1 want to pay but I like said Dautner.
Melanson said he thinks you are dating for awhile
that it
once
should
be shared while Kerry’ thinks that
it.
The worst things are to expect him to cany the whole conversation or be rude at all to either him or the server. While men are stereotyped as the ones who will most likely use a
you
relationship,
questioned
why, Ryan said, Because 1 dont smoke, I hate it, I can t stand it. Kerry said. It reveals a weakMelanson said he also ness. prefers a girl who doesn t smoke. I hate a girl with a dirty mouth.
them. 1 like the hunt too. Wliile many people go out to bars and clubs with the intention of
offer,
he said.
All agreed that they
stand
likes.
when he s
he sees a
provocatively
this
stuff.
of 10 ass on her. One of the major myths in relationships is who should approach
good
said Dautner.
also said that
a club, if
said
Melanson laughed
is.
high up there but you will put less stock in her looks the longer you re
do what you want do someto
who
guy
is
girl got 90 per cent on her test. Melanson grinned and added. It s more like, that girl s got a nine out
based on your personality. If you meet somebody, looks are
the time and
it
However, Ryan did
decide whether or not they like you
girls niglits
on
as willing to share
we don t go around
they change over time. Men may first be interested in you because of your looks but will
party
t
They
of women.
attributes
topic, saying that
to,
every night and
have
cal
treat-
first
and breast size were the topics as well as other physi-
sports
main
without even knowing what
are the
night, they
want a woman who will do what tliey want from time to time. just go 1 like a girl who doesn t
and
I
discussed by the men. Wliile looks
when Women take
Ryan
more natural look. don t want them to smile and
then their face cracks, said Ryan. When asked what they talk about when women aren t around, cars,
clothing
Attractiveness
the
they
prefer a
men?
perfection
also
out
really
ies
be herself.
and plan the
what
compliment his
to
women
the industry, men said
They Dautner ments. spend hours working out at the gym, in an effort to achieve a desirable body. They perfect their bod-
be told what to time, time from doing I admitted Dautner. He also wants a girl that can hang out with the guys re doing.
Is that
likes
many feeding cosmetics
my face
Ryan
love interests. His strategy
spend
money
up, but
and hair
some-
plans rather than call and ask what
we
and
smile and you approach.
While
attractiveness.
weren
for what?
sive
times they do. I
made
my
are perfect
are
women
is
also a factor in
just right,
of
lot
girls
ago so she knows he s been paying attention to what she says and does, and not just the way she looks. Another topic of interest was smoking. Most men hate it when
Makeup
spend hundreds of dollars on expen-
their confidante
by women,
sure
my clothes
about
is
off a
of stomach are nice and Dautner said. Nothing beats a nice tight pair of jeans.
so that was cool. woman, 1 ve spent hours hair
show
when
like
t
always asking where they ve been or who they ve been with, and when they get jealous of other girls. But do women have a right to be suspicious? When asked who has cheated, two out of the five said yes. One said no because it happened to him and it was not a good feeling. Another said that whether or not he would cheat would depend on the seriousness of the relationship. Men like a lot of different things in women. But, how do you know when he likes you? When asked about the subtle ways men use to attract women there were a number of intriguing methods mentioned. Dautner said he likes to use the three-look rule. At the bar you look once to establish eye contact and look away, look twice and if she s still looking you know she s interested. You look again, you
bit
what they do, makes him dinner, and since we re talking men here, initiates sex at the end of the night. Ryan said he had a girl help him clean his ear for a car show once. She cleaned the engine and the
not that her and she s like. No, I way, then she s a tease Melanson
lives run
Kerry, shorter tops that
;
straight then finally
s all
look for
But, one thing
things.
a
three-quarter
everyone seemed to be sporting when they first came out, are high on their pet peeve list as well as long denim skirts. According to
to like different
women and
women wear
The
length pants or peddle-pushers that
remains the same, they all want a woman who is smart, fun and who has a lot of ambition. I look for a girl who s very headstrong. She has a good, positive presence around her, said Ryan. They all had ideas about the best' thing a woman could do for them. High on the list was havmg her plan a whole day where she decides
is
in blurting out
seemed
all
aspects about
m
t
t
the things
ridiculous.
bit
time and won t interrogate him when he gets home.
If they re sitting
night she
you your space or demand too much of you, added Dautner. Melanson agreed saying he doesn t like it when girls fry to take over
is
doesn
attention.
two weeks
get
angry just for the sake of getting angry. 1
is
If a girl is teasing
how
women can
that
was not shy
Dautner
while
it
He added
it
considered a tease. Roy defined this type of girl as one who flirts a lot with no intention of giving guys what they want. When asked what men really want, Melanson
women catty
too
really like
because they have low self-esteem, said Ryan. Dautner agreed, saying that sometimes girls will say anything to get
all
some of
have boobs. he likes a girl who care what he s doing all the that they
the attention,
but the reason for
who
said he
finds
chicks that want
A
and trustworthy?
men don
To men,
the opposite sex.
is
life
do kissed you
if
1
right
now.
Kerry
long as
women don
them and shyly
ask.
walk up to Are you sin-
t
gle?
The
five
guys said they hate
being asked stupid questions by females, with the worst one being.
Do
1 look fat in this? Dautner said he just thinks.
you asking me this, Keny thinks. Oh God.
are
Why while
Ryan, on the other hand, goes for true honesU'. If a girl asks me that It s not the clothes that make 1 say.
you look fat, vou look fat.
it s
the fat that
makes