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VOLUME 11 - ISSUE 1 / MARCH 2015


phie Woman’s Woman’s Magazine Magazine

INSIDE: Girlfriends In God ~ Are You A Good “EZER”? | Page 14 Sophisticated Women ~ Do You “Think” About Your Thoughts? | Page 8 Me, Myself, & Inc. ~ Are You Welcoming Adversity? | Page 28 shutterbuggerz photos throughout magazine



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Message Heart from the

From The Editor: Judy Smith

Here it is March and I am still talking about Christmas! It is not that I planned on doing that but circumstances have just led me in that direction. Yesterday at church, a very sweet lady came up to me and told me she just wanted to thank me. Wow, I thought. Here is someone that I twisted her arm to take over a service at church that we needed help with. I knew she would be great at it and I knew she would be blessed for doing it but I really did not expect her to thank me for it. As it turned out, that is not what she was thanking me for at all (I am sure that will come later). She said she wanted to thank me because when her husband got home he told her he would not complain about how many Christmas decorations she ever wanted to do again. That probably was not a very smart move on his part and especially now that I have put it in print for all to see. Here is what happened. If you read my article last month, I told you how ALL of my outside Christmas decorations would probably be up for a very long time because of some health issues my husband is having and not been able to do anything about them.

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I am a member of Tri-City Baptist Church and we have a group called The Band of Brothers. This is a group of men who together challenge each other to be men of God. I got a call from them and they said they were coming to my house to take down our Christmas lights. Did they ever! It probably looked like a SWAT team invading our little neighborhood. Truck, after truck, after truck swooped in and men started peeling out. Immediately, they went to work. It only took them an hour and everything was down, boxed and packed away till the next time. Oops, I just realized I might not have told the time in case they got home late and told their wives it was because of all the work they did. Shucks, I shouldn’t worry about that, I KNOW that didn’t happen. Remember, it was the Band of Brothers! Here is the amazing thing about this. My husband never, ever asks for help from anyone. It is just not part of his DNA. He thinks he is supposed to do it all and really, always has. This was one of those times that he just could not do it. One of the guys asked me if I knew how this came about. Now I just thought it was because the men at church knew the situation with my husband and just wanted to help. He told me that was not the case and they did not know that we still had outside decorations out until one of the men of the group told them they read it in Sophie Woman’s Magazine. When I wrote about it last month, I was trying to encourage everyone to not judge but to think of what others might be going through. Since I love humor, I was joking around about our house, never expecting a blessing to come back to me. Yet it did and I am so thankful for it. I will always be thankful….until the next time we get ready to decorate the house. You remember the scene in Christmas Vacation when Clark takes out that ball of lights…Oh my! Just kidding! They did a marvelous job and I can never tell them how much that meant to us. Thank you Hugh, Randy, Dave, Jeff, Ken, Steve and also to Willard who brought it to their attention. However, they did tell me what Willard really said was he was getting tired of the neighborhood looking so bad! One last thing….I am thankful that I am at a church that really cares about others and a church that puts a focus on men being the leaders of their homes. Blessings, Love and Laughter

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phie Woman’s Magazine

P.O. Box 1393 22 South Main Ave. Newton, NC 28658 (P) 828-466-0122 (F) 828-466-0124 Editor: Judy Smith Production Manager: Scott Hansley Graphic Design: Brittany LeFever Sales: Marion Keener 828-320-0040 Saralyn McGalliard 828-244-1617

A Special Thanks To All Of Our Distributors Please be sure to visit all of our participating advertisers and remember to support area local small businesses. How to place an ad: Call our office at (828)466-0122 and leave a message. One of our sales representatives will return your call as soon as possible. You may also fax material to (828)466-0124. We reserve the right to refuse to run any ad we deem to be controversial or in bad taste. For more information about advertising or to view Sophie Woman’s Magazine online, visit our website at

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Message From The 3 Reaching Your Full 6 Sophisticated 8 “Yes you did; You Laughed” 12 Girlfriends In 14 Health to 18 Are You Trending? 24 The Front 26 Me, Myself, & 28 Health 31 Recipes For 32 It’s All About the 36 Day In and Day 40 Vision Changes As You 42 Even the Cavemen Used TOOLS! 44


We have been asked by many of our readers to offer a subscription to Sophie Woman’s Magazine. If you would like more information about a subscription, please visit our website at: You can also find more information on page 10 of this issue.

********************************************************** Disclaimer: Sophie Woman’s Magazine LLC is published monthly. The articles published in Sophie do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the publisher. All articles are intended for informational purposes only, and none should serve as a substitute for doctor’s advice and orders. Advertisers are solely responsible for the content and validity of information published within their ads and are not necessarily endorsed by the publisher. Deceptive or misleading advertising is not knowingly accepted by the publisher. Advertising is accepted with the understanding that all liability for copyright violations is the sole responsibility of the advertiser. All material submitted for publication is considered to be the sole property of the advertiser. Sophie Woman’s Magazine LLC’s publishers, staff, and other persons involved in the creation, production, or delivery of the magazine (in whatever format) or its content, do not assume any liability or responsibility for the accuracy, completeness, or usefulness of any information provided in the magazine, nor shall they be liable for any direct, indirect, incidental, special, consequential, or punitive damages arising out of the use of the magazine. **********************************************************

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Submitted by Charlene Long Photography

by Kim Fletcher, Life Coach, Speaker, Author

"In every encounter we either give life or we drain it; there is no neutral exchange." Brennan Manning A few years back my friend and associate, Mercy Hope was speaking for a group of teenage girls at an Arts Camp. Her topic was “Speaking Life.” At the end of the session she had the girls, and the camp staff, come together to create a circle. Then she had each person turn to the person to her left to share something that she had appreciated or admired about that person during the week together. It was one of those unforgettable moments in time when the power of a concept comes to life! One high-school senior said to the younger girl next to her, “When you first started hanging around me early on in the camp, I tried to get away from you. I kinda thought you younger kids were annoying and I just wanted to be off by myself. But as the week progressed I really started seeing a lot of myself in you. You remind me of myself when I was your age. You are a really talented dancer, and you are actually a lot of fun. And now, I consider you like my little sister!” She then wrapped her in a big, sisterly embrace. The teenage-style candor brought a chuckle, but the tender come-back brought a heartwarming tear.

Submitted by Heidi Houser Photography pg 6 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | March 2015

Speaking Life should not have to be formally facilitated. It should naturally flow out of us. One way “Speaking Life” could be described is seeing the beauty in another person and reflecting it back to them so they can see it through another’s eyes. But if you find it difficult to speak life over “your circle” it could be because you have not had enough life giving words spoken over YOUR life. So may I take a moment and do so?

3000 years ago, King Solomon said, “The tongue has power over life and death. So you must accept the consequences of your words.” Eugene Peterson paraphrased this Proverb by saying, “Words kill, words give life; they're either poison or fruit - you choose.”

You are not an accident. You are not a mistake. You are not alive “by chance.” You were created, because you were wanted.

Modern song writer Toby Mac worded the concept like this, “With every syllable, hope can live or die. So speak life.”

You are priceless.

I hope that my words today remind you of your value and potential, but also your influence! Picture your negative words as bullets. Gun cocked, ready to wound.

You have yet to see your full potential. You deserve consideration and respect. You are desirable.

Now see your positive, encouraging words as a life-giving antidote to all the negativity in this world, ready to apply like a healing ointment.

You are lovable and you are loved. You are a living piece of artwork. There never has been, and never will be, another you. You are irreplaceable. You have to choose if you will live as if this is true. Will you make the mark on this world that you are meant to make? Are your words and actions creating a legacy of hope and life, or devastation? Take a moment to think back to the words have most formed your life. Stop. Pause. Remember. The words that stung. The words that healed. Now, think about the words that have come out of your own mouth this past week. How have they affected your listeners? Do your words create inspiration and motivation? Or distrust and discouragement? If you do not believe you are a powerful person, you are wrong. You hold the power of life and death - right on the tip of your tongue. This is a truth that has been known down through the ages. Over

Which do you choose for your children, your spouse, your coworkers, your friends, your enemies, or the server at the restaurant? Do you want to make others bleed, or bandage a wound? Your choice of words makes that choice. I agree with Dave Willis when he says, “Be an encourager. The world has plenty of critics already.”

This article was inspired by our Team Associate, Mercy Hope.

As a Life Coach of global impact, Kim would love to share these principles and more with your group or organization, with topics ranging from identity/ goals/vision to developing the leader within. How could your organization be transformed today by identifying and revising broken systems? Kim would also love to hear your life and leadership impact stories. You may contact her team of coaches and speakers directly at: / / 828 327 6702.

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Sophisticated Women. . Think

By Nicole Greer, PPCC Founder and Principle Coach at Vibrant Coaching

Submitted by Brittany Higgins Submitted by Simply Enchanted Photography

Sue confessed to me that she wanted to be married. There was some shame in this ideal since the man she first married treated her so badly. Deep inside her, in her soul, was this belief that love was possible. It bubbled up from her soul into her heart. On occasion, if she allowed it, the thought even made its way into her mind where she was courageous enough to entertain it. In her mind, Sue finally thought love was possible for her and most importantly, that she deserved to be loved. While she knew this was true in her mind, heart and soul, there was another thought that swirled around in her head. This thought told her that she was being risky, naive, a glutton for punishment. Both of these thoughts fought for her attention, her imagination, and ultimately for her energy. Everybody has five energies that allow us to take action toward our ideals. The energies are: intellectual, emotional, spiritual, physical and social energies. Our thought life drives our ability to engage these five energies appropriately. Having systems, strategies and smarts in place to control your thought life is of vital importance. Imagine a life controlled by thoughts that deal with what is possible. Imagine a thought life that can take what is possible and turn it into something probable. Imagine your life lived each day this way.

Submitted by Sarah Sharpe Photography

What would that be like?

Perhaps, you'd finally think courageous thoughts that led to bold action in service to your ideals that are seated deep in your soul? That's what Sue did.

She began to think about her thoughts. She started practicing metacognition. According to Nancy Chick, the Assistant Director at the Center for Teaching at Vanderbilt University, "Metacognition is, put simply, thinking about one’s thinking. More precisely, it refers to the processes used to plan, monitor, and assess one’s understanding and performance. Metacognition includes a critical awareness of a) one’s thinking and learning and b) oneself as a thinker and learner." Sue created a plan so she could think about how she thinks. She monitored the plan. And she assessed her understanding and performance based on her thought life. In this system, she began to unravel her thought life so that she could choose how to think and engage her energies rather than simply allow her thought life to hold her back from all that she believed and could achieve. She is now living a vibrant life! Would you like to do metacognition so you can live a vibrant life?

Let's get started.


Submitted by Tiffany Co Photography pg 8 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | March 2015

The System

Each and every day you start your day in the quiet. Journal your thoughts. Don't journal to get the words "right." Instead just journal what comes to you. This is called, free writing. There is no editing. No

holding back. Grammar does not count. No one but you is to read these words. You simply allow yourself to think onto paper. Each and every night, you end your day in quiet. Read over your morning journal entry. Reflect on it in light of your day. Journal again in the free writing mode. Again, there are no rules. Quality and quantity are not even considered. You simply come to the paper to think. Think, capture, and conclude when you feel you're done. That's it. Continue this process observing what you think, when you think it and most importantly what you are learning about your thought life. Doing this journaling will create a coveted state of mind called consciousness. You'll start to know what you think!

Core Values

The Strategies

After a period of three weeks, re-read your journal entries looking for core values in your journaling. Core values are principles, ideals, and concepts that you believe at a cellular level. These beliefs are hard wired in you. They act as a guiding light that illuminates where your energy needs to be plugged in. If you would like a complete list of core values, don't hesitate to email me at

partner? Is she happy?”

The answer is yes! As Sue began to journal and observe her thinking she found that a lot of her insecurity about finding a life partner came from her body image. As she journaled about this, she found the courage to take up running. She’s run several marathons and loves her new identity as an athlete. At the heart of this identity is the core value of health. Her new found health has caused her confidence to palpable. You can feel Sue’s presence and she’s less worried about what people think. She knows that her life’s length and quality is based on her actions in the present. She has a strong sense of urgency. Her urgent, exciting, and contagious way of moving in the world is very healthy and attractive. She thinks she is valuable and therefore others think that too! While you might think that the new body she got from running is the thing that attracted her new partner, you’d be mistaken. If you ask her new husband why he was attracted to Sue, he won’t hesitate to tell you that he likes the fact that she has a “mind of her own”. And yes, she does. She owns the thoughts in her mind. And you can too.

The Smarts!

Get a sense of urgency. The old adage is true. You only have one life to live. Your days are numbered. You've got only one shot at this life. Let's get started! Start by thinking about how you are thinking! I know you’re thinking, “What happened to Sue? Did she find a

At its deepest level, working with a coach frees you to identify your birthright gifts, discern your deepest passions, and fulfill your highest purpose. A coach can pry you off dead center. As Principal Coach for Vibrant Coaching and Workshop Leader for The Lydia Group, LLC, a collaboration of individuals focused on work, life and spiritual growth, Nicole is on a mission to impact, energize, and influence people to lead a Vibrant Life by engaging the possibilities. As a life and business coach and workshop leader, Nicole views her role as a conduit to release all that you want to achieve.

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pg 10 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | March 2015

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What’s really behind my laughter? Is it that joke about why the toilet paper rolled down the hill, you know, so it can get to the bottom? Or is my lack of faith showing, er, again?

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God knows my soul. Fully, intimately. He knows what puzzles me, sets doubt afire, creates a smile, sends me reaching for a tissue, or lifts anger into orbit. He knows my deepest needs and my greatest desires, both the god-honoring ones and, well, those others. And He knows when my laughter is exposing a lack of faith. Consider Sarah. Well advanced in years and still childless. She hid behind the entrance to her tent in the heat of the day while Abraham kept the company of three men, one being the Lord Himself. Sarah heard the Lord’s pronouncement, that He would return the following year and she would have a son. Yep, perform the impossible. Old Sarah’s face must have widened to a Texas-sized grin as she glanced at dry and wrinkled hands amply covered in age spots. And she laughed...quietly to herself, of course, in order to conceal her doubt. Sarah’s private (or so she reckoned) thought was, “An old woman like me? Get pregnant? With this old man of a husband?” (Genesis 18:12, The Message) But the Lord knew the inner workings of her soul. When He questioned Sarah’s laughter she allowed fear to be her spokesperson and lied. “I didn’t laugh.” The Lord countered with, “Yes you did. You laughed.” Yep. He knows. And this on the heels of having had a name change from Sarai to Sarah, meaning she’d be blessed as the mother of many nations. The point is not that God reads minds. Duh. I know that. It’s that He bypasses both my silent thoughts and the words that come from my mouth - sometimes spewing - and speaks directly to the most honest place of my soul. A holy super-power we humans just don’t have. Seriously, when I tell my neighbor how sorry I am that his dog died when really I couldn’t be more thrilled that there’ll finally be a blessed end to its ‘brakes gone bad’ canine screeching (hmm, did I just write that out loud?), it’s not God I’m fooling. Scripture is replete with God’s responses to people that don’t seem to line up with their questions or statements. When Jesus cursed a fig

pg 12 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | March 2015

tree that lacked fruit (Mark 11:20-22) the following day the disciples saw that it was withered from the roots. Peter exclaimed, “Rabbi, look! The fig tree you cursed has withered!” Jesus answered, “Have faith in God.” Clearly, the issue wasn’t the fig tree. His response exposed Peter’s lack of faith. Because out of the overflow of (what’s REALLY in) the heart the mouth speaks (Matthew 12:34). God invites me to be honest, to be authentic, to be real. Both with Him and with others. Especially if, well, there’s nothing laughable about the ominous results of a medical test. Or a failing marriage. Or an incarcerated child. Or a husband’s untreatable cancer. Or a daughter’s infertility. Or an adoption that falls through. Or a financial crisis. Or an aging and demanding parent. Or insults and criticisms...

The thing is, my words may fool you, but God knows what I really mean by what I say. Or, as with Sarah, what I think. He speaks directly to the real intent of my heart knowing that my laughter may have meant I’m diseased by doubt. But next time someone shares a joke with me (like the one about the painter who thinned his paint to make a larger profit until a voice from above instructed, “Repaint! Go and thin no more!”) cut me some slack if I laugh out loud. It could be I truly thought that was funny.

About the Author

Honest, authentic, and real or not, God will answer according to the needs and desires that are really there.

Mary Albers Felkins is a former Registered and Licensed Dietitian turned writer. Throughout the course of her private nutrition consulting business she wrote much of her own teaching materials.

So... ~Do I pray with confidence believing by faith He is able to meet my need? Or do I sound more like an ineffective vacuum salesman: “You wouldn’t want to heal my child, would you?” ~Do I pray with honesty asking exactly what it is I desire or need? Jesus did. In a place called Gethsemane (Matthew 26:39) He asked that the cup of suffering be taken from Him. He stokes the fire of my faith with, “What do you want me to do for you?” (Mark 10:36, 51) And the hardest part... ~Do I accept His answers? Back to Gethsemane. Jesus followed His honest plea with, “Yet not as I will but as You will.” (Matthew 26:39)

Mary is currently constructing her first Christian contemporary romance using principles taught by My Book Therapy ( She considers scripture the most alluring romance ever written. She is married to Bruce and they have four (adolescent to young adult-sized) arrows in their quiver. Mary cordialy invites you to take a plunge into the deep oceans of thought or to stop and laugh out loud at her website, www. Email contact

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I’m an Ezer and Proud of It by Sharon Jaynes

Today’s Truth

“The LORD God said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him’” (Genesis 2:18 NIV).

Friend to Friend

For thirteen years, our family was blessed with a golden retriever named Ginger. We gave her to our son, Steven, for Christmas when he was five-years-old, and she still holds the blue ribbon as the best present ever. I can still remember the look of surprise on Steven’s cherub face when the “stuffed” animal began to move. “It’s a puppy!” he exclaimed. “It’s not a toy!” And while Ginger was officially Steven’s dog, and I was unofficially her primary caretaker, it was my husband who held a special place in her heart. From the very beginning, Ginger loved my husband the best. Ginger lollygagged her days away by sleeping in the driveway or lounging by the back stoop steps. However, when my husband’s car entered the neighborhood and turned the corner onto our shady Stratfordshire Drive, Ginger’s ears perked up and her eyes began to beam. Suddenly infused with a burst of anticipatory energy, she would jump to her feet and run in circles. “He’s home! He’s home!” she seemed to say. When Steve pulled into the garage and opened his car door, Ginger whined, ran to greet him and rested her head on his left leg while he cooed and rubbed her ears. Steve’s homecoming was the highlight of her day. No wonder dog is called “man’s best friend.” Ginger was loyal, didn’t nag, and loved Steve no matter how much or how little attention he paid to her on any given day. She was very forgiving and almost immediately forgot any injustice such as not giving her table scraps or being left behind when we traveled on vacation. Often at the mere sight of Steve, Ginger rolled over on her back and beckoned him to rub her tummy. She always responded to his touch like it was heaven on earth. What man wouldn’t love such a response from “his girl”? And yet, when God created Adam and placed him in the Garden, only to determine that “It is not good for man to be alone,” He did not create a dog to be his loyal companion. God created a woman to fill the void in Adam’s life. She was called a “helper.” And while you may have one definition in mind when you read the word “helper,” “ezer” is packed with so much more. The Hebrew word that is translated “helper” is “ezer.” This term is derived from a Hebrew word used of God and Holy Spirit: azar. Both mean “helper”—one who comes alongside to aid, assist, or rescue. The ESV Study Bible notes that the “helper” is one who supplies strength in the area that is lacking in the helped. Ezer appears 21 times in the Old Testament. Twice in Genesis it describes the woman (Genesis 2:18, 20). But the majority of references (16 to be exact) refer to God, or Yahweh, as the helper of His people. The remaining three references appear in the books of the prophets, who use it to refer to military aid. So friend, married or not, being an ezer is quite an honor. It is a word denoting great strength.

pg 14 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | March 2015

We would be very remiss if we looked at the word ezer or helper only in domestic terms. Adam didn’t need someone to cook for him, clean up after him, or care for him. That was not the problem. The void in Adam’s life was that he did not have a companion to work with him, rule the earth with him, love with him, procreate with him, and after the fall—struggle with him. A dog might have been an easier adjustment for Adam, but God decided Adam needed someone with words. As an ezer or a strong helper, and one of the best ways we “help” is with our words. So how will we use them? Not just with husbands but with people in general. Will we use them to fortify or flatten, defend or defeat, complete or compete? The choice begins in our minds, runs through our hearts, and responds with our lips. Today, think of the ways you can be the ezer God created you to be.

Let’s Pray

For the married woman: Dear Lord, I so want to be a good ezer–a good companion that is my husband’s completer. I want to be a helper and not a hindrance. Help me to use my words in such a way that help him to be all that You have created him to be as we work together in life. In Jesus’ name, Amen. For the single woman: Dear Lord, thank You for creating me to be a helper—a strong women who comes along to assist where needed. Give me the right words to say to help others to be all You have created them to be. Help me not to tear down others with my words, but build them up. Help me to speak life into those around me today. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Now It’s Your Turn

What do you think of when you think of the word “helper”? Why do you think Adam needed a helper? How have you been an ezer to your husband over the past week? (Not geezer, mind you, but ezer.) You might want to ask him some ways that you could help him in the coming days? If you are single, what are some ways that you can be anezer to those around you today? Aren’t you glad that God created you to be a “mighty warrior”—one who comes along to rescue? If so, click over to my Facebook page and say, “I’m an ezer and proud of it!”

More from the Girlfriends

Do you want to become the woman of your husband’s dreams? Would you like a little “wow” back in your relationship with the man you married? Then let seven simple secrets from my book, Becoming the Woman of His Dreams: Seven Qualities Every Man Longs For, transform your marriage. With biblical wisdom and responses from hundreds of men I surveyed, you’ll get a glimpse into your husband’s deepest longings. While you’re there, check out, Praying for Your Husband from Head to Toe. You can even join hundreds of women all around the world in the 30-Day Prayer Dare.




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Spring Clean Your Diet

Spring is just around the corner! It’s so exciting to start to see the crocus pop-up and the sunlight giving us hope that it’s actually going to get warm soon! It’s also a reminder to lighten up, brighter days are ahead! At this time of the year we often think about spring cleaning our homes but this is also a good time to think about spring cleaning our lifestyles. Just like when we start to spring clean our homes we can clean-up our health by making small, sustainable, changes. When we incorporate one small change, or clean out one small closet, and then move on to the next small improvement it doesn’t seem so overwhelming. Below are a few ways we can build health into our bodies so that we have the Health to Thrive!

•Eat from the Earth- Become conscious about consuming foods that aren’t altered from the way in which they grow or live on earth. Typically foods that are in the natural form are healthier for our bodies and are digested more easily. •Processed Foods- Eliminate or greatly reduce the number of processed foods you and your family are consuming. Some processed products have added chemicals and artificial ingredients that aren’t helpful, and in some cases can be harmful, for our bodies. Eliminating processed foods completely can be challenging. Start by reading the ingredient labels. Look for products with 5 or fewer ingredients and make sure the ingredients are words you can pronounce. Instead of having the packaged or frozen dinner, trying making the same dish at home with whole, real ingredients. •Eliminate Artificial Sweeteners- Artificial sweeteners trick the brain into thinking it is receiving something sweet causing the body to anticipate that it will receive calories and therefore the pancreas releases insulin. This confuses the brain and can leave you hungry. Additionally, there have been studies showing artificial sweeteners are both safe and unsafe. When in doubt, leave it out.

•Shop the Perimeter of the Grocery Store- Most fresh produce and meats are kept around the perimeter of the grocery store. Staying in the outside areas eliminates the temptation of all of those colorful boxes, especially if you have children with you! •Omega 3s- Incorporate omega-3s into your diet. A diet rich in omega3s, which are a “smart fat”, help to protect brain and heart health. The brain is made 60% of fat so it’s important, especially for developing brains, to incorporate healthy fats into our diets. We want to make sure we incorporate the healthy fats and eliminate hydrogenated oils, also called trans fats, which have been altered so they have a longer shelf life. Wild salmon, tuna, flax seed, organic eggs and high quality fish oil supplements are good sources of omega-3. •Eat More, Lots More, Fruits and Vegetables- Try to incorporate fruits and vegetables into every meal. Sneak finely diced vegetables and vegetable purees, like canned pumpkin, into soup and chili. Serve a side of cut up fruit with each meal.

pg 18 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | March 2015

•Eat for the Season- Eat what is in season for optimal nutrition that is also more affordable. When fresh produce is picked and transported long distances it starts to lose its nutritional value. Eating produce that is locally grown and in season can have higher nutritional value, helps to support our local farmers and has less of an impact on our environment. For a list of fruits and vegetables that are in season visit

The “Dirty Dozen” Apples Strawberries Grapes Celery Peaches Spinach

Sweet Bell Peppers Nectarines- imported Cucumbers Cherry tomatoes Snap Peas- imported Potatoes

My daughter loves this healthy smoothie. I make it for breakfast and I know she has a good nutritional foundation to start to the day.

½ cup organic soy or almond milk 2 Tablespoons non-fat organic Greek yogurt 2 teaspoons honey Handful frozen sliced strawberries 1 banana Blend together in a blender and serve.

•Organic produce and eggs can be more expensive. If your budget allows try to choose organic for at least the “dirty dozen”. Each year the Environmental Working Group ranks produce based on the amount of contamination they contain. Check the list to the left. Eating healthy takes effort and preparation. Start each day with a plan for fueling your body with nutrition throughout the day. Keep snacks such as bags of nuts, apples, oranges and all natural nutrition bars in your purse and at your desk. It’s also good to scope out a few restaurants that you know serve healthier options and suggest those when a friend asks you to lunch. By all means, go to lunch! We all know that catching up with our friends is imperative for optimal health! Like Health to Thrive on facebook to receive free health information.

Dana C. Killian, MBA Certified, Plant-Based Nutrition- eCornell University Dana is passionate about improving awareness around the importance of the food we feed ourselves and our families. Her mission is to equip and encourage women to use their influence to positively affect the health of our families. Dana is married to Jonathan Killian and they have two children, Gavin and Brianna. Like Health to Thrive on Facebook to receive health information and share the health tips that are working for you family.



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What’s a Makerspace? To describe them simply, makerspaces are community centers with tools. Makerspaces combine manufacturing equipment, community, and education for the purposes of enabling community members to design, prototype and create manufactured works that wouldn’t be possible to create with the resources available to individuals working alone. These spaces can take the form of loosely-organized individuals sharing space and tools, for-profit companies, non-profit corporations, organizations affiliated with or hosted within schools, universities or libraries, and more. All are united in the purpose of providing access to equipment, community, and education, and all are unique in exactly how they are arranged to fit the purposes of the community they serve. Makerspaces represent the democratization of design, engineering, fabrication and education. They are a fairly new phenomenon, but are beginning to produce projects with significant national impacts.

pg 22 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | March 2015




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Greater Statesville Chamber of Commerce 704.873.2892 | pg 23

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I’m sure you’ve heard the phrase “Keeping up With the Joneses”. Well, the phrase has changed but it means basically the same thing. Now the term is “Trending”. So, are you trending when it comes to your wedding?

I’ll be the first to admit that almost everything has changed when it comes to planning a wedding, from the dress to the honeymoon, nothing will ever be the same. The smart wedding planners, dress designers, retailers and travel agents have all changed their attitude about what a wedding should be. As quoted in the movie, “We’re not in Kansas anymore” and actually, we haven’t been there for quite some time, it just takes some longer to realize it. If you attend a designer wedding fashion show, it becomes apparent that the styles have changed. Usually most of the dresses are a little different from what we are used to and realistically most of us wouldn’t give some of them a second glance. I mean, they are totally weird. But look beyond all the quirkiness and you’ll be able to see things like good design with unique styling, great use of fabrics and even a few new colors. That is what the normal bridal designers go by for the retail market. White wedding dresses are becoming a rarity; most are in shades of ivory and have names like eggshell, candlelight, diamond dust, moonlight and so on. Some of the newest colors this year are the palest shades of blush and mint. Sometimes the colors are so pale that only daylight can show the true color.

Another trend is to see a bride wear multiple dresses on her special day, one for the wedding, another for the reception and sometimes one for her departure. The dress for the reception is usually shorter so the bride can dance with ease. Now we also see the groom shed his coat and tie at the reception which used to be a no-no. The poor guy was expected to suffer for hours during the reception because that was the norm.

As for flowers, I am seeing more and more unstructured bouquets with unique flowers. Some bouquets look like you went to a meadow and just picked your own. More kinds of greenery and fill-ins are being used as well. Of course there will always be those beautiful bouquets made from just one type of bloom, like roses for example. And even though you can’t beat the smell of a fresh bouquet, still about half of brides opt for silk bouquets. Easily understood because they are less expensive and can be done ahead of time.

No longer is a bride expected to have numerous bridesmaids and groomsmen. It used to be that if you had 6 bridesmaids, you had to have 6 groomsmen. Now, you can have as many or as few as you want, AND you can have all one or the other or NONE! More bridesmaids are doing different styles in the same color or shades of a color. This way they can pick a dress style that is more flattering for them.

More couples, especially those that are paying for their own weddings, are delaying their honeymoons for a month or more. They may get a better deal by doing this, especially by avoiding peak travel times. With all the online travel sites, there are great deals out there.

And now to my favorite part-cake, or lack thereof because some brides now are customizing that ever-so-popular part of their wedding. They are doing cheesecake bars, pie bars, ice cream sundae bars, crepe bars and even waffle bars-all instead of the usual cake. And over the past few years cupcake towers have become popular with flavors like maple-bacon, bourbon and decadent chocolate. When I was younger, a wedding reception included the cake, mints and pickles. And yes, I said pickles, because it has long been a Southern thing. My husband’s family would never have served any kind of cake without offering pickles.

So, are you trending? Mackey S. Carpenter

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by Judy Smith

My great grandmother lived on a winding mountain road in an old house. I do not exaggerate when I say that her front porch almost touched that road. When we went to visit, we had to park our horse and buggy (just kidding), on a gravel road that ran along one side of the house. We always went on a Sunday when we visited her and traffic, even then, could get pretty heavy from tourists traveling to see Chimney Rock or go to Cherokee. It was somewhat frightening for us kids to walk up to that porch with cars so close to us but that is what we had to do. I absolutely loved my great grandmother even though I don’t remember much about her except her home and her surroundings. She was of Indian decent although I don’t know from which tribe and maybe that is part of the love I had for her. She was mystical to me. She sat in a rocking chair that overlooked that front porch. The house was not much but it was hers. It was very small. When you walked in off the porch, you walked right into her living room and bedroom combined. That rocking chair set between her bed and the window and it was always rocking. It was a fairly long room for the time I supposed, because between the foot of her bed to the far wall was the “couches” and chairs. Just in case you don’t know what a couch is, well, it is a sofa. There was no running water, no bathroom and no refrigerator. She cooked on a wood cook stove and the refrigerated stuff stayed in the creek. I just thought that was so great. When the big wooden bucket was low on water, I would volunteer to run to the creek and fill it up. Now that was some cold refreshing water even though everyone drank from the same silver ladle.

pg 26 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | March 2015

As kids, we had some great times playing behind the house in and around the creek even though we were told over and over not to get in that creek. The memories I have of that time are dim but one memory that never fades is of my great grandmother, always rocking away. She always looked the same, never changing. Hair in a bun on top of her head, a long dress down to her ankles with an apron tied under her breasts because her belly was big… always the same picture. One thing I really hate is I never talked to her much. It was not that I was afraid of her but more about her “REGALness”. I wish I knew her story, her background, how she lived, her childhood, and so many more things. What mysteries would I have found out, what she loved and hated….all the things I could have asked but didn’t! We aren’t interested in those old folks when we are young. Yet, I would not hasten to wager that if you are now my age, that you wish you would have spent more time, asked more questions of someone you only have a few sparse memories of. When we have family get togethers, everyone is always chattering away about the things that are going on right now. Every once in a while, I start to mention something that happened in my childhood and no one pays me any attention. Maybe one day they will want to know more about my childhood and things I experienced….but , we are not guaranteed another day. So kids and grand-kids, you need to fix a meal and invite your weak, feeble grandparents over and ask them some questions before it is too late. Yep, my great grandmother sitting in her rocker, rocking away; Wish I had more memories! I think she is where I got my love for rocking and why I have a rocker on my porch. If your grandparents or even your great grandparents are still alive…..take time to talk and ask them to share their memories. You won’t regret it.

Love, Laughter and Blessings

Listen to your elder's advice, not because they are always right but because they have more experiences of being wrong. Author Unknown | pg 27

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Are you welcoming adversity? Probably when you first read the title of this column, you were thinking, why would anyone welcome adversity? Good, then I have gotten your attention. Think about this for a moment. If everything was easy and you just sailed through life, would you feel that you had accomplished much? Chances are, no, you would not. A phrase by Madame Swetchine I have posted in my bedroom so I can see it every night before I go to sleep is: “To every difficult duty there is a charm, known only to those who have the courage to undertake it.” If you expect that you will have some challenges along the way, you are more prepared to accept, shift, ebb and flow. You have courage to face it head on with a belief that you will come out on the other side stronger and wiser.


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Allow COURAGE to be your secret weapon in getting you through a difficult situation or overcome an unexpected challenge: C = Calmness: Allowing your blood pressure or temper to rise only raises your likelihood of failure. Staying calm is your first defense towards finding a solution, because your thoughts will remain lucid and open to possibilities. Whether it is taking deep breaths, meditating or taking a few moments to rest your mind when you are first faced with the situation, allow yourself the gift of calmness to help you put things into perspective. O = Optimism: Believing that the best result will occur is powerful in bringing it into reality. If you only focus on what else could go wrong, then you are allowing fear of the unknown to overpower you. Whenever you are faced with a difficult situation, immediately think about your ideal outcome that would delight you, comfort you, strengthen you, or get you through the situation. U = Understanding: Seek and ye shall find. Our greatest means of understanding what we are going through is to ask questions. Of ourselves. Of others. One of the biggest blunders of most people is making assumptions without any basis of fact. These assumptions grow into worry, doubt, and defeat. Seek to ask questions and allow this inquisitiveness to shed true light on the situation. R = Resiliency: When trying to overcome a challenge, some of what you try may not work out exactly as you had hoped. The old adage, “If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.” is exactly what is necessary. A challenge is placed before you for a reason. Often times, it is the universe’s way of testing just how committed you are to a particular goal. Allow your tenacity to help you be resilient in finding other ways to approach the situation. A = Attitude: Your attitude has a huge impact on your ability to overcome anything you might face. Beyond being optimistic, it also needs to be self aware and encouraging. Sometimes, when you are going through something, you only have yourself in the beginning to turn to, or at least it feels that way. Whenever I am faced with a challenge, reminding myself of these three promises taught to me by my grandmother have never, ever failed me. 1) Find a way or make a way by helping others find a way or make a way; 2) Don’t feel guilty about making life easier for yourself; and 3) Be open to all possible resources and support. These promises enable me to navigate my way through a challenging situation by putting each of them into practice.

pg 28 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | March 2015

G = Gratitude: Being grateful for a challenge is often a hard pill to swallow when you are in the midst of it. However, it is exactly the mindset that will open your thinking up to the possibilities of how to overcome the situation. When you are cursing and complaining, you are closing yourself up and off. When you are appreciating that you will gain more insight, knowledge, strength, confidence, abilities, support or a myriad of other possibilities, you are opening yourself to the probability that you will be successful in the end. E = Enlightenment: The “charm” mentioned in the quote by Madame Swetchine is the enlightenment you will realize as you look back on the challenge that you have overcome. Our ability to learn from what we face or from our mistakes is why there is truly no limit to what we can achieve. Always take a moment after you have realized your outcome to reflect on what you did to get you there. Allow it to sink into your psyche so it will resurface without hesitation to come to your aid again.

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The reality is that each day we are faced with challenges, small and large. The key is to approach life with the expectation that you will have adversity, and with a mindset that you can overcome anything that you encounter along your life’s journey. Welcome adversity and you will realize a charmed life with so very much to appreciate.

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Bio: Sherré DeMao inspires millions through her monthly columns, weekly Insight eZine and national contributing writing. An expert strategist and marketer focused on entrepreneurs, her unique perspective and innovative approach has earned numerous awards regionally, nationally and internationally including being named among the Top 50 Enterprising Women of North America in 2007. Her books, Me, Myself & Inc. ( and 50 Who is eligible for U9<?/E„rw Individuals who are: Marketing Secrets ( have received national55acclaim as Top Business Shelf picks and must-reads. Aged and older

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Popular Sports For Age doesn’t have to stop older men and women from enjoying their favorite sports. In fact, remaining active can improve physical and mental health. If a doctor has confirmed that it is okay to participate in sports, these activities can help men and women 50 and older enjoy friendly competition and physical activity.


Swimming A few laps around a pool works your whole body. Swimming is attractive to seniors because it works the muscles and provides a cardiovascular jolt without putting any strain on the joints.

Cycling Many seniors are avid cyclists. You can ride a bicycle in competition or for pleasure. You can even vary your route depending on how physically intense you want the ride to be. Seniors need not abandon their love of sport just because Father Time is catching up with them. Many sports can be enjoyed by athletes of all ages.

Fishing is more than just a leisurely day at the lake. Casting and reeling in your catch provides a good workout for the arms, legs and core muscles of the body. If you fish on the water, rowing out to your lucky spot provides additional cardiovascular exercise.

Golf Golf is enjoyed by people of all ages. Requiring a combination of strategy and skill, golf also pays several physical dividends. Play at your own pace, taking your time walking from hole to hole so you can enjoy the sunshine and soak in the beauty of the course.


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Call (828) 624-1358 to speak with a Fast Track nurse who will schedule your colonoscopy. 1RRIoFHRUGRFWRUUHIHUUDOQHHGHG %RDUG&HUWLoHG6SHFLDOLVWVLQ*DVWURLQWHVWLQDODQG/LYHU'LVHDVH

pg 30 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | March 2015

H ealth Watch Colorectal Cancer – Screening Saves Lives

If you are 50 or over, talk to your doctor about colon cancer screening. Colorectal cancer is the #3 cause of cancer death among men and women in the United States. Each year, more than 140,000 people are diagnosed with colorectal cancer in the U.S. and over 50,000 people die from it. Colorectal cancer is considered a silent killer because often there are no symptoms until it is too late to treat, so prevention is key.

3. Tobacco use increases your risk of colorectal cancer. If you use tobacco, quit. If you don’t use tobacco, don’t start. 4. Exercise for at least 30 minutes three to four days each week. Even moderate exercise such as walking, gardening, or climbing steps may help reduce your risk. 5. Reduce weight. Obesity is now a well-established risk factor for colon cancer and many other chronic diseases. If you are over 50 or have a family history of colorectal cancer, talk to your healthcare provider about getting screened today. Find out what kind of screening procedure is right for you. It could save your life. Article courtesy of Gastroenterology Associates, P.A. Locations in Hickory and Lincolnton 828-328-3300 Gastroenterology Associates, P.A is a specialty medical practice which provides advanced evaluation of diseases of the esophagus, stomach, small intestine, colon, pancreas, biliary system (gallbladder and bile ducts) and liver.

Preventable. Treatable. Beatable.

The good news is that 80-90% of colorectal cancers can be prevented by regular screening. The majority of colorectal cancers arise from precancerous growths in the colon called polyps, which can be found during a screening exam and removed before they turn into cancer. Colorectal cancer screening should be a part of routine healthcare for people 50 years of age and over.

Over 50? Family History? Get Screened.

Age is the single most important risk factor for the disease. Even people who lead a healthy lifestyle can still develop polyps and cancer. Both men and women are affected by colorectal cancer equally. Once you are over 50, your lifetime chance of developing colon cancer is one in seventeen. In individuals with a family history of colon cancer and some other conditions, screening should begin at age 40. Research has shown that African-Americans should begin screening at age 45.

Quality Colonoscopy is the Preferred Prevention Test

Colonoscopy is considered the preferred colorectal cancer screening test because it is the only test that both finds and removes precancerous polyps during the same sedated exam. It is critical that the exam be of the highest quality and done by a gastroenterologist who is good at finding polyps, known as the “Adenoma Detection Rate”, or ADR. Recent studies show convincing evidence that quality colonoscopy drastically reduces the risk of death from colon cancer, but poorly performed colonoscopy may not. A person at average risk with normal colonoscopy results won’t need another exam for 10 years. Should a polyp or cancer be found, follow-up intervals may be more frequent. The colonoscopy procedure is safe and effective, well-tolerated, and can potentially save your life.

Five Steps to Lower Your Risk of Colorectal Cancer

1. Get regular colorectal cancer screenings beginning at age 50. If you have a personal or family history of colorectal cancer or colorectal polyps, or a personal history of another cancer or inflammatory bowel disease, talk to your doctor about earlier screening. Be sure your exam is done by a gastroenterologist with a proven record of high ADR (Adenoma Detection rate.) 2. Eat a low-fat diet. | pg 31

Recipes for ife


by Emily Wickham

Food for the Body Black Bean & Corn Salsa (Inspired by Barb Gertz’s recipe: 2 cans black beans, drained (15 oz. each) 1 can corn, drained (15 oz.) 2 cans tomatoes & green chilies (10 oz. each) 4 Tbsp. lime (or lemon) juice 2 Tbsp. olive oil 1 tsp. salt ¼ tsp. pepper ½ onion, chopped Combine all ingredients in a bowl and stir well. The salsa can be served immediately with tortilla chips, but it’s best when chilled for several hours.

A Prayer for God’s Blessing Loving Father, You are Author of the greatest Book ever written. Eloquent, living, and powerful, Your Word changes lives. I confess I don’t hunger for it as I ought, often taking it for granted. Thank You for revealing Yourself in expressions we can ponder repeatedly—for precious truth we can hold in our hands and absorb in our hearts. Please fill me with a growing desire for the Bible, compelling me to savor every word. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Food for the Soul As an expectant mother, I craved spicy dishes—particularly Mexican fare. I’m certain this salsa would have been one of my favorites if I’d known about it back then. Even now, years later, I still enjoy spice and heat in my food. If you enjoy crunching on salty chips laden with fantastic flavor, this colorful medley will please your palate too. People obviously gravitate toward different food types. But when it comes to spiritual sustenance, God’s Word satisfies. I wonder, however, whether we truly hunger for it. Do we regularly, willingly set everything aside to glean its nourishment? Or are we too distracted by worldly entertainments and too interested in temporal pleasantries to focus on Scripture? “For the word of God is living and active and sharper than any twoedged sword, and piercing as far as the division of soul and spirit, of both joints and marrow, and able to judge the thoughts and intentions of the heart.” Heb. 4:12, NASB I love this description of God’s Word: ALIVE. Scripture isn’t

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outdated—it’s relevant today. It isn’t fiction—it’s absolute truth. The Bible contains a unique power no other book can claim. Piercing our very souls and spirits, God’s Word judges our thoughts and intentions. Are you wrestling with questions concerning your purpose and future? Do you long for peace? Pick up the Bible and read of the one true God who loves you … the Savior who died and rose again so you can live forever. Realize Jesus Christ came to free you—to become “sin on our behalf, that we might become the righteousness of God in Him” (2 Cor. 5:21). Treasure the truth that God created us in His image and prepared good works for His people to accomplish (see Eph. 2:10). God provides His Word so we can know Him intimately. Since He’s preserved it throughout centuries, shouldn’t we set aside daily time to read it? Courageous Christians like William Tyndale lost their lives so we can read the Bible in our own language. If it maintained such value to them, shouldn’t we also treasure these divine words of life? Friends, the church in America needs revival … a fresh touch from God. His Word contains the truth that will change us. “The unfolding of Thy words gives light; It gives understanding to the simple.” Ps. 119:130 Our world waxes in darkness. Yet we hold light in our hands when the Bible rests in our palms. Let’s open this cherished Book, seek God on its pages, and attain the understanding it supplies. Consider implementing these tips to enhance your reading experience: •Choose a consistent time of day when you can sit quietly and focus on the Lord. •Prayerfully select a book of the Bible or use a Bible reading plan like this online arrangement: chronological.html. •Pray before reading: ask God to speak to you through His Word. •Be sensitive to the Holy Spirit’s promptings as you read: what phrases or verses especially stand out? •If you struggle to understand something, ask God to help you comprehend it. •Utilize study tools that define the original language, such as the Key Word Study Bible (AMG Publishers) and, an online resource. •Read with expectancy that God has something to say to you. Remember, His Word is ALIVE! •Make it personal: apply the truth you read to your life. No other book compares to the living Word of God. May we truly hunger for it. If you don’t have your own Bible, please email emily@ I’ll be glad to give you one so you also can experience God’s life changing Word. Until next time, that’s a Recipe for Life… Emily Wickham gently reaches women’s hearts as she teaches God’s ! Through various writing endeavors, she encourages readers Word. into close relationship with God. Additionally she hosts and speaks at the Connecting with Christ Conference. Visit to read Emily’s blog. Connect with her via social media: Emily, grateful to God for His blessings, enjoys life with her loving husband and children in western NC.


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752 4th St SW Hickory, NC 28602 828-327-6970 Visit us on Facebook:

Shutterbuggerz Submitted by Cheri Hoke Photography

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Submitted by Mary Garren Submitted by Angie Houston | pg 35

they have 2 islands that contain drawers, shelves, or even coffee makers. They are custom and can be tailored to your personal needs. Tie racks, hat pegs, handbag shelves, scarf holders and popular custom requests. Many of these huge closets have a chaise lounge or ottoman in case you get tired trying on all those shoes. Some walk-in closets have a fancy chandelier and wallpaper that reflects the owner’s personality.

It’s All About the Space

by Susan Guest, ASID

Rejoice! We have almost made it through winter. Buds are on the trees, birds are singing, and everything is coming back to life. The Lenten season is a great time to think about renewing our souls, bodies, and surroundings. Plan projects for both indoors and out. Toss, donate, or refashion things that no longer make you smile. Spring is a great time to find storage solutions to organize the things you wish to keep. Here are some ideas that might help you in your planning. • Shoes: Remember the “War of the Roses’ Movie from the ‘80s with Kathleen Turner and Michael Douglas? The movie was about a couple who separated and fought over possession of the house. My favorite memory of that movie was her enormous shoe closet! Most of us do not have the space for that many shoes, but there are some great ideas that might help. Drawers that pull out from stairs are popular today and are an excellent place to store shoes. In my small home with no walk in closet, I have shoes in under- the -bed containers, on shoe trees in one closet and on a wall hung shoe rack in another closet. One of the nicest things I’ve seen for shoe storage lately has been a shoe tower. This carousel stores tons of footwear. The display turns so that you see all of your shoes and make your selection of the day (or hour)! •Storage Ottomans- I have been selling these for years, but now they are becoming more main-stream. A storage bench is a great place for everything from sheet music, shoes, books, a pillow and blanket, and extra clothing. These otts come in every shape and size available. The best ones have a slow closing top so that you won’t slam your fingers.

•Walk-in Closets- have gone to a new level. The shoe closet and huge clothing storage space that was in “The War of the Roses” movie is now much more common in all sizes of homes. Some closets are so large that

•Boot Storage: Since boots have become so popular, most of us have several pairs. In a small closet, they can be hard to store. Now there are hangers for boots so that you can easily get to them and have more room for shoes on the floor of your closet. •Jewelry: Lately, I’ve seen some nice storage ideas for jewelry. One client purchased a full length mirror on a stand. The entire front mirror opened to reveal a huge jewelry storage area with hooks for necklaces, places for rings, bracelets, etc. Medicine cabinets that recess into the wall behind your bedroom door offer great storage for jewelry. Boxes with lift out trays are also nice.

•Books: We love to read at our home and seem to have a never -ending supply of books. Even though we trade or give away books that we don’t want to keep, there is still never enough space for these. Built-ins are a great way to store books because you can go all the way to the ceiling, above windows, and around an entire room. Rolling ladders help to get to the top shelves. In a magazine photo lately, I saw a long, narrow shelf running down a hallway that had books displayed so that you could view the entire cover. No art was needed for that hallway since the book covers were interesting and fun.

•Back-hallway Storage: The back entrance to a home can be a trap for shoes, books, shopping bags, etc. In new homes, many clients ask for storage lockers that are labeled for each family member and a bench with shoe storage underneath. Pegs for coats and a high shelf for hats or briefcases and book bags are helpful. If your home is older, you might find a suitable space in a laundry room or other back area and install a coat rack and some shelves. •Specialty Storage: Many homes today have a Christmas closet. Some of my clients who enjoy wrapping gifts have a designated area for this task with places for bows, ribbon, paper and boxes. Other clients have felt -lined closets for silver, large spaces for guns, and all sorts of collections. Susan Guest, ASID is an award-winning interior designer in Hickory and owner of Guest Interiors, LLC. She is one of the designers featured in “Spectacular Homes of the Carolinas”, found in high-end bookstores around the country. President of ASID Carolinas. For more information, visit

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Tues , Wed , & Fri 10-6, Thurs 10-7, Sat 10-4 pg 36 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | March 2015

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Girlfriends In God ~ The Power of Quiet | Page 19

“Changes”~ Dealing with My Postpartum Depression | Page 7

Reaching Your Full Potential ~ How you see yourself will determine who you become (Part 2) | Page 12

Reaching Your Full Potential ~ The Lazy Woman’s Guide To Achievement | Page 12

Sounds of Silence: The Lesson in the Loss | Page 28

A Mom’s Dream ~ How I was influenced by a teacher years after school | Page 23

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pg 38 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | March 2015


Just Because






Ask about Scout Camp-ins at Catawba Science Center. On the SALT Block • 243 Third Ave. NE Hickory • (828) 322-8169

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Day In and Day Out... Finding our Hope in a God who is Unwavering by Jackie E. Perry, MS, LPCS, NCC

A sudden noise in the room abruptly awoke me from my deep sleep. I lay motionless in bed, relieved that the disasters I had just envisioned were not actually happening all around me. As I tried to regroup and ready myself for the day ahead, my racing heart, thumping chest and nauseous stomach lingered on. I kept telling myself I had nothing to fear. The more I tried to convince myself that all was well, however, the more my mind became like sticky tape, clinging to anything that provoked stress and perpetuated my symptoms. Sitting up, I decided to face the day, hoping that my mind, my body and my spirit would press on to cope with all that I had before me.

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pg 40 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | March 2015

Hope. It’s what we all want. Both parents and teens share this longing. We’re both hungry for hope. A teen might say, “I hope my parents let me have my car back.” While the parent may say, “I hope she can stay clean,” or “I hope he makes good choices.” Each of us looks at the problem, the mess before us, and we imagine or wish for a more desirable scenario. We hope that something about the future will improve, heal or maybe, just disappear. But, the best solutions are never enough to satisfy our soul’s ravenous appetite for hope. Because even when things turn out just as we wanted, our thoughts are directed to the next thing that needs a little dose of hope. And, there is always something else, isn’t there? It seems that our minds can be really good at conjuring up all the troubles within us or around us. Sometimes, we address these by resolutely rearing up. At other times, we despairingly give up. At least if we stop hoping, we can spare our hearts from feeling the pain of disappointment.

As a counselor, I hear people talk about their hopes all the time. They express many different emotions associated with these desires. The tears they shed represent that nagging uncertainty, the perpetual burden that comes from wanting something but not knowing if it will come to pass. Because their hope is no more than a wish or a strong desire, it is really never fully guaranteed. They can try to carefully control a situation but they don’t know what will happen. This is so unsettling to our soul. As believers, we are instructed to place our hope in God. We are told we have a different kind of hope. But, what does that really mean? When the heart is racing, the thoughts are spinning, the tears are streaming and the ground beneath you is crumbling, what difference is there? What does it really mean to place our hope in Him and does it really change anything at all? If earthly hope is wishing for something while at the same time expressing our uncertainty, then biblical hope must offer us something more secure on which to stand. John Piper, a well revered pastor and author says, “Biblical hope is not a mere desire for something good to happen, it is a confident expectation and desire for something good in the future.” This kind of hope has a moral certainty in it and is not dependent upon wishful thinking, a breath being held or on fingers being crossed. It knows and believes that God is at work and that we can expect great things because of that. This hope rests in knowing who He is and leaning into those truths. As I have pondered this difference quite a bit lately, I have tried to exercise this hope by transferring my thoughts from listing possible resolutions to declaring truths and promises about my God. For example, “I hope I can do this,” becomes “I hope you can do this God.” And, because He is able, it’s as if I hear him instantly whisper back, “Yes, I can.” When I look at a troubling situation, instead of muttering, “I hope this turns out okay,” I consider my great and powerful God and say, “I am hoping in your perfect providence.” Because his plan is sure and perfect, this hope is guaranteed because. This hope leans on a God that is sure, and able and strong, and provident, and merciful, and loving and ever present. Whether I can see the solution or resolution with my eyes, he is fully present and fully working in me and through me and around me.

“If you can’t do great things, do small things in a great way.” - Napoleon Hill

What do you want? For, what do you wait? You can spin your wheels devising possibilities and striving to insure that everything happens as you hope it will. Or, you can direct your heart, mind and soul toward a God who is sure, constant, and guaranteed. No matter the situation, real or imagined, when our hope is rooted in the faithfulness of God, it is always unwavering. And now, O Lord, for what do I wait? My hope is in you. Psalm 39:7

Jackie E. Perry, MS, LPCS, NCC is a North Carolina Licensed Professional Counselor. For the past 20 years her primary focus has been working with adolescents and families to address a myriad of problems typical of this season in development. Jackie is also a frequent speaker and writer who is passionate about using her experience to equip and encourage parents and professionals through her seminars, articles and blogs. You can follow her weekly blog, LifeGiving Streams, check out her next speaking engagement or learn more about her work at She is married to John and together they are parenting three teens of their own. | pg 41


Changes As You Age

As a person gets older certain bodily changes are to be expected. For example, muscle tone may diminish and bones can become more fragile as we age. Exercise and healthy eating may be able to stave off some of the effects of aging, but avoiding vision problems may require some additional effort. Vision naturally diminishes as we age, but not all vision changes are related to aging. Many natural changes are not severe and may only require a minor adjustment in prescription glasses or contact lenses. Improved lighting or bigger print may help remedy other issues, including blurry text. However, certain conditions that people blame on getting older really may be hereditary or a byproduct of an illness. There’s a difference between changes that are the result of aging and those that are not. Recognizing the differences can help individuals get the treatment necessary to prevent permanent eye damage. Age-related changes Difficulty seeing clearly for reading and close work is one of the most common age-related vision issues. This condition can begin as early as age 40 and worsen as a person gets older. Variation in the eyes’ ability to focus properly is called presbyopia, and it will worsen over time. Other normal signs of aging include problems with glare from headlights or the sun. Lens changes in the eye can cause light to


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be scattered rather than focused on the retina. This leads to more glare. In dim conditions, a person may find he or she needs more light to see well. That’s because muscles that control pupil size and reaction to light lose some strength. Changes in color perception also may begin. The normally clear lens of the eye can discolor, making it difficult to distinguish between certain hues. Conditions not directly tied to aging Certain eye disorders may become more prevalent as a person gets older, but that does not mean they are a byproduct of aging. Macular degeneration, which causes spotty loss of detail or sudden and severe loss of central vision, may occur. This condition is a result of damage to the macula, the central part of the retina responsible for detail, color and daylight vision. Risk factors for macular degeneration include high cholesterol, diabetes, smoking, and untreated high blood pressure. Poor circulation to the retina is the most common cause of macular degeneration. Glaucoma is another condition linked to aging. Glaucoma is caused by damage to the optic nerve by fluid pressure inside the eye. Patients with glaucoma typically do not exhibit early symptoms. Glaucoma is only detectable through routine vision examinations. According to the Mayo Clinic, about half of all 65-year-old Americans have some degree of cataract formation in their eyes. People who have cataracts may think they’re an unavoidable part of getting older. While aging may increase the risk of getting cataracts, according to Lighthouse International its true cause is unknown. Other risks include long-term exposure to the sun’s rays, high cholesterol, diabetes, smoking, and eye injury. Illnesses like diabetes can affect eyesight in many different ways. Proper treatment for diabetes and management of the condition can prevent a number of eye disorders. Adults should not assume all vision changes are a direct result of getting older. Annual vision examinations by qualified eye doctors can pinpoint the cause of problems and find treatment options that are successful.



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Even the Caveman Used TOOLS!

by Cyndi Caldwell

You get in the car, turn the key and drive to the store. Simple! You grab a hammer, take a nail, strike the nail with the hammer and hang the picture. Simple! You don't stop and think. You take advantage of what's appropriate and what's available to accomplish your task. It's called using a TOOL! According to a 2014 study by Global Social Enterprise Initiative (GSEI) at Georgetown University, 91% of all seniors want to age in their own home. If that statistic is true, then why do some seniors insist on not taking advantage of the tools that will allow us to accomplish that? Recently, I went to visit a neighbor who had suffered a fall. She had worked hard in rehab to recover and was now able to return home, but under strict orders from her physician to use a walker. On her second day home, I knocked on the door just to check on her. Here she came, floppy bedroom shoes scuffing along, and NO WALKER. When she opened the door, I said, Duffy, where's your walker? You're still recovering. Her reply, as she held precariously on to a chair, Well, I don't need it here in the house, I really only use it when I have to go out. Oh my goodness, how I wish i didn't see this as frequently as I do. The reality is far too many seniors don't take advantage of the tools that allow us to get healthy and stay healthy in our own homes. The stigma of using a walker or cane, or wearing a first alert bracelet or necklace because it "makes me look old" is putting our health and our continued mobility at risk. Per a 2014 article by the Center for Disease control, the fact is one in three of us over the age of 65 will fall this year. Since many seniors live alone, falling becomes an even larger issue. My mother in law always felt confident because she had her cell phone. One night, she fell getting out of the bed and broke a bone. Yes -- her cell phone was where she could SEE it, but she could not REACH it. She lay there in pain for hours until she crawled to her phone to call for help. If she had only had a first alert pendant, what a difference it would have made. It's normal to think, that will never happen to me... until it does. We live in an age of technology and innovation. That technology and innovation is going to allow us to live at home longer - but only if we use it. There are many examples of low tech and high tech that can be harnessed to give us more independence and better lives.

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pg 44 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | March 2015

Low tech -simple things to keep us safe: • Using a walker or cane consistently as recommended by our physician for balance and mobility • Adding grab bars to the shower or bath • Reorganizing our kitchen and closet so that we are not reaching or using stool • Asking family, friends, or hiring a service for difficult yard work and home repair • Asking family, friends, or even calling a service if we are unable to drive to do errands, doctor appointments, and social activities • Opening ourselves up to services such as Meals on Wheels, Friendship Trays to insure proper nutrition • Welcoming and asking for assistance from friends, and family

High tech - technologies that can enhance our lives: • First alert bracelets or pendants that provide easy access to immediate assistance • Electronic pill dispensers - a simple unit that alerts the user that medications are ready to be taken and delivers them in the proper dosage from the dispenser • GPS tracking service on your cell phone so that family and friends can know your exact location in an emergency • Mobile/rechargeable wheelchairs/ scooters allow for enhanced mobility • Skype and other computer tools to stay in touch with family and friends There are many more low and high tech tools of which we can take advantage, but the key is to remember the old adage pride go before the fall. Don't put up roadblocks to the tools that can keep you healthy, happy, productive and mobile for as long as possible. The tools and technology are there - all we have to do is USE THEM!

About The Author As a CERTIFIED SENIOR ADVISOR* Cyndi is on a mission to advise Seniors and their family members on viable options in Senior Care and Dementia Care. She is an accomplished writer and public speaker - focused on educating the community on senior services and Alzheimer’s disease. Currently Cyndi is a Certified Senior Advisor* with Seniors Helping Seniors –a service providing care FOR seniors BY SENIORS – so that families can stay in their homes and age in place.

Where Quality Is Our Primary Care


30 13th Avenue NW Hickory, NC 28601

(828) 324-0100 | pg 45

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Submitted by Mary Garren pg 46 | Sophie Womanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Magazine | March 2015

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Sophie Woman's Magazine - Mar 2015 Issue  

Inspiration, Education, & Motivation for Women of All Ages!

Sophie Woman's Magazine - Mar 2015 Issue  

Inspiration, Education, & Motivation for Women of All Ages!