VOLUME 11 - ISSUE 1 / MARCH 2015
phie Woman’s Woman’s Magazine Magazine
INSIDE: Girlfriends In God ~ Are You A Good “EZER”? | Page 14 Sophisticated Women ~ Do You “Think” About Your Thoughts? | Page 8 Me, Myself, & Inc. ~ Are You Welcoming Adversity? | Page 28 shutterbuggerz photos throughout magazine
INSPIRATION ~ EDUCATION ~ MOTIVATION
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Message Heart from the
From The Editor: Judy Smith
Here it is March and I am still talking about Christmas! It is not that I planned on doing that but circumstances have just led me in that direction. Yesterday at church, a very sweet lady came up to me and told me she just wanted to thank me. Wow, I thought. Here is someone that I twisted her arm to take over a service at church that we needed help with. I knew she would be great at it and I knew she would be blessed for doing it but I really did not expect her to thank me for it. As it turned out, that is not what she was thanking me for at all (I am sure that will come later). She said she wanted to thank me because when her husband got home he told her he would not complain about how many Christmas decorations she ever wanted to do again. That probably was not a very smart move on his part and especially now that I have put it in print for all to see. Here is what happened. If you read my article last month, I told you how ALL of my outside Christmas decorations would probably be up for a very long time because of some health issues my husband is having and not been able to do anything about them.
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I am a member of Tri-City Baptist Church and we have a group called The Band of Brothers. This is a group of men who together challenge each other to be men of God. I got a call from them and they said they were coming to my house to take down our Christmas lights. Did they ever! It probably looked like a SWAT team invading our little neighborhood. Truck, after truck, after truck swooped in and men started peeling out. Immediately, they went to work. It only took them an hour and everything was down, boxed and packed away till the next time. Oops, I just realized I might not have told the time in case they got home late and told their wives it was because of all the work they did. Shucks, I shouldn’t worry about that, I KNOW that didn’t happen. Remember, it was the Band of Brothers! Here is the amazing thing about this. My husband never, ever asks for help from anyone. It is just not part of his DNA. He thinks he is supposed to do it all and really, always has. This was one of those times that he just could not do it. One of the guys asked me if I knew how this came about. Now I just thought it was because the men at church knew the situation with my husband and just wanted to help. He told me that was not the case and they did not know that we still had outside decorations out until one of the men of the group told them they read it in Sophie Woman’s Magazine. When I wrote about it last month, I was trying to encourage everyone to not judge but to think of what others might be going through. Since I love humor, I was joking around about our house, never expecting a blessing to come back to me. Yet it did and I am so thankful for it. I will always be thankful….until the next time we get ready to decorate the house. You remember the scene in Christmas Vacation when Clark takes out that ball of lights…Oh my! Just kidding! They did a marvelous job and I can never tell them how much that meant to us. Thank you Hugh, Randy, Dave, Jeff, Ken, Steve and also to Willard who brought it to their attention. However, they did tell me what Willard really said was he was getting tired of the neighborhood looking so bad! One last thing….I am thankful that I am at a church that really cares about others and a church that puts a focus on men being the leaders of their homes. Blessings, Love and Laughter
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Message From The Heart......................................pg 3 Reaching Your Full Potential................................pg 6 Sophisticated Women............................................pg 8 “Yes you did; You Laughed”...........................pg 12 Girlfriends In God.............................................pg 14 Health to Thrive................................................pg 18 Are You Trending?............................................pg 24 The Front Porch..................................................pg 26 Me, Myself, & Inc...........................................pg 28 Health Watch......................................................pg 31 Recipes For Life...............................................pg 32 It’s All About the Space..................................pg 36 Day In and Day Out.........................................pg 40 Vision Changes As You Age............................pg 42 Even the Cavemen Used TOOLS!..................pg 44
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REACHING YOUR FULL POTENTIAL: Speaking Life Over Others
Submitted by Charlene Long Photography
by Kim Fletcher, Life Coach, Speaker, Author
"In every encounter we either give life or we drain it; there is no neutral exchange." Brennan Manning A few years back my friend and associate, Mercy Hope was speaking for a group of teenage girls at an Arts Camp. Her topic was “Speaking Life.” At the end of the session she had the girls, and the camp staff, come together to create a circle. Then she had each person turn to the person to her left to share something that she had appreciated or admired about that person during the week together. It was one of those unforgettable moments in time when the power of a concept comes to life! One high-school senior said to the younger girl next to her, “When you first started hanging around me early on in the camp, I tried to get away from you. I kinda thought you younger kids were annoying and I just wanted to be off by myself. But as the week progressed I really started seeing a lot of myself in you. You remind me of myself when I was your age. You are a really talented dancer, and you are actually a lot of fun. And now, I consider you like my little sister!” She then wrapped her in a big, sisterly embrace. The teenage-style candor brought a chuckle, but the tender come-back brought a heartwarming tear.
Submitted by Heidi Houser Photography pg 6 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | March 2015
Speaking Life should not have to be formally facilitated. It should naturally flow out of us. One way “Speaking Life” could be described is seeing the beauty in another person and reflecting it back to them so they can see it through another’s eyes. But if you find it difficult to speak life over “your circle” it could be because you have not had enough life giving words spoken over YOUR life. So may I take a moment and do so?
3000 years ago, King Solomon said, “The tongue has power over life and death. So you must accept the consequences of your words.” Eugene Peterson paraphrased this Proverb by saying, “Words kill, words give life; they're either poison or fruit - you choose.”
You are not an accident. You are not a mistake. You are not alive “by chance.” You were created, because you were wanted.
Modern song writer Toby Mac worded the concept like this, “With every syllable, hope can live or die. So speak life.”
You are priceless.
I hope that my words today remind you of your value and potential, but also your influence! Picture your negative words as bullets. Gun cocked, ready to wound.
You have yet to see your full potential. You deserve consideration and respect. You are desirable.
Now see your positive, encouraging words as a life-giving antidote to all the negativity in this world, ready to apply like a healing ointment.
You are lovable and you are loved. You are a living piece of artwork. There never has been, and never will be, another you. You are irreplaceable. You have to choose if you will live as if this is true. Will you make the mark on this world that you are meant to make? Are your words and actions creating a legacy of hope and life, or devastation? Take a moment to think back to the words have most formed your life. Stop. Pause. Remember. The words that stung. The words that healed. Now, think about the words that have come out of your own mouth this past week. How have they affected your listeners? Do your words create inspiration and motivation? Or distrust and discouragement? If you do not believe you are a powerful person, you are wrong. You hold the power of life and death - right on the tip of your tongue. This is a truth that has been known down through the ages. Over
Which do you choose for your children, your spouse, your coworkers, your friends, your enemies, or the server at the restaurant? Do you want to make others bleed, or bandage a wound? Your choice of words makes that choice. I agree with Dave Willis when he says, “Be an encourager. The world has plenty of critics already.”
This article was inspired by our Team Associate, Mercy Hope.
As a Life Coach of global impact, Kim would love to share these principles and more with your group or organization, with topics ranging from identity/ goals/vision to developing the leader within. How could your organization be transformed today by identifying and revising broken systems? Kim would also love to hear your life and leadership impact stories. You may contact her team of coaches and speakers directly at: www.kimfletcherassociates.com / email@example.com / 828 327 6702.
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Sophisticated Women. . Think
By Nicole Greer, PPCC Founder and Principle Coach at Vibrant Coaching
Submitted by Brittany Higgins Submitted by Simply Enchanted Photography
Sue confessed to me that she wanted to be married. There was some shame in this ideal since the man she first married treated her so badly. Deep inside her, in her soul, was this belief that love was possible. It bubbled up from her soul into her heart. On occasion, if she allowed it, the thought even made its way into her mind where she was courageous enough to entertain it. In her mind, Sue finally thought love was possible for her and most importantly, that she deserved to be loved. While she knew this was true in her mind, heart and soul, there was another thought that swirled around in her head. This thought told her that she was being risky, naive, a glutton for punishment. Both of these thoughts fought for her attention, her imagination, and ultimately for her energy. Everybody has five energies that allow us to take action toward our ideals. The energies are: intellectual, emotional, spiritual, physical and social energies. Our thought life drives our ability to engage these five energies appropriately. Having systems, strategies and smarts in place to control your thought life is of vital importance. Imagine a life controlled by thoughts that deal with what is possible. Imagine a thought life that can take what is possible and turn it into something probable. Imagine your life lived each day this way.
Submitted by Sarah Sharpe Photography
What would that be like?
Perhaps, you'd finally think courageous thoughts that led to bold action in service to your ideals that are seated deep in your soul? That's what Sue did.
She began to think about her thoughts. She started practicing metacognition. According to Nancy Chick, the Assistant Director at the Center for Teaching at Vanderbilt University, "Metacognition is, put simply, thinking about one’s thinking. More precisely, it refers to the processes used to plan, monitor, and assess one’s understanding and performance. Metacognition includes a critical awareness of a) one’s thinking and learning and b) oneself as a thinker and learner." Sue created a plan so she could think about how she thinks. She monitored the plan. And she assessed her understanding and performance based on her thought life. In this system, she began to unravel her thought life so that she could choose how to think and engage her energies rather than simply allow her thought life to hold her back from all that she believed and could achieve. She is now living a vibrant life! Would you like to do metacognition so you can live a vibrant life?
Let's get started.
Submitted by Tiffany Co Photography pg 8 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | March 2015
Each and every day you start your day in the quiet. Journal your thoughts. Don't journal to get the words "right." Instead just journal what comes to you. This is called, free writing. There is no editing. No
holding back. Grammar does not count. No one but you is to read these words. You simply allow yourself to think onto paper. Each and every night, you end your day in quiet. Read over your morning journal entry. Reflect on it in light of your day. Journal again in the free writing mode. Again, there are no rules. Quality and quantity are not even considered. You simply come to the paper to think. Think, capture, and conclude when you feel you're done. That's it. Continue this process observing what you think, when you think it and most importantly what you are learning about your thought life. Doing this journaling will create a coveted state of mind called consciousness. You'll start to know what you think!
After a period of three weeks, re-read your journal entries looking for core values in your journaling. Core values are principles, ideals, and concepts that you believe at a cellular level. These beliefs are hard wired in you. They act as a guiding light that illuminates where your energy needs to be plugged in. If you would like a complete list of core values, don't hesitate to email me at firstname.lastname@example.org.
partner? Is she happy?”
The answer is yes! As Sue began to journal and observe her thinking she found that a lot of her insecurity about finding a life partner came from her body image. As she journaled about this, she found the courage to take up running. She’s run several marathons and loves her new identity as an athlete. At the heart of this identity is the core value of health. Her new found health has caused her confidence to palpable. You can feel Sue’s presence and she’s less worried about what people think. She knows that her life’s length and quality is based on her actions in the present. She has a strong sense of urgency. Her urgent, exciting, and contagious way of moving in the world is very healthy and attractive. She thinks she is valuable and therefore others think that too! While you might think that the new body she got from running is the thing that attracted her new partner, you’d be mistaken. If you ask her new husband why he was attracted to Sue, he won’t hesitate to tell you that he likes the fact that she has a “mind of her own”. And yes, she does. She owns the thoughts in her mind. And you can too.
Get a sense of urgency. The old adage is true. You only have one life to live. Your days are numbered. You've got only one shot at this life. Let's get started! Start by thinking about how you are thinking! I know you’re thinking, “What happened to Sue? Did she find a
At its deepest level, working with a coach frees you to identify your birthright gifts, discern your deepest passions, and fulfill your highest purpose. A coach can pry you off dead center. As Principal Coach for Vibrant Coaching and Workshop Leader for The Lydia Group, LLC, a collaboration of individuals focused on work, life and spiritual growth, Nicole is on a mission to impact, energize, and influence people to lead a Vibrant Life by engaging the possibilities. As a life and business coach and workshop leader, Nicole views her role as a conduit to release all that you want to achieve. www.thevibrantcoach.com/www. thelydiagroup.com
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pg 10 | Sophie Womanâ€™s Magazine | March 2015
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What’s really behind my laughter? Is it that joke about why the toilet paper rolled down the hill, you know, so it can get to the bottom? Or is my lack of faith showing, er, again?
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God knows my soul. Fully, intimately. He knows what puzzles me, sets doubt afire, creates a smile, sends me reaching for a tissue, or lifts anger into orbit. He knows my deepest needs and my greatest desires, both the god-honoring ones and, well, those others. And He knows when my laughter is exposing a lack of faith. Consider Sarah. Well advanced in years and still childless. She hid behind the entrance to her tent in the heat of the day while Abraham kept the company of three men, one being the Lord Himself. Sarah heard the Lord’s pronouncement, that He would return the following year and she would have a son. Yep, perform the impossible. Old Sarah’s face must have widened to a Texas-sized grin as she glanced at dry and wrinkled hands amply covered in age spots. And she laughed...quietly to herself, of course, in order to conceal her doubt. Sarah’s private (or so she reckoned) thought was, “An old woman like me? Get pregnant? With this old man of a husband?” (Genesis 18:12, The Message) But the Lord knew the inner workings of her soul. When He questioned Sarah’s laughter she allowed fear to be her spokesperson and lied. “I didn’t laugh.” The Lord countered with, “Yes you did. You laughed.” Yep. He knows. And this on the heels of having had a name change from Sarai to Sarah, meaning she’d be blessed as the mother of many nations. The point is not that God reads minds. Duh. I know that. It’s that He bypasses both my silent thoughts and the words that come from my mouth - sometimes spewing - and speaks directly to the most honest place of my soul. A holy super-power we humans just don’t have. Seriously, when I tell my neighbor how sorry I am that his dog died when really I couldn’t be more thrilled that there’ll finally be a blessed end to its ‘brakes gone bad’ canine screeching (hmm, did I just write that out loud?), it’s not God I’m fooling. Scripture is replete with God’s responses to people that don’t seem to line up with their questions or statements. When Jesus cursed a fig
pg 12 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | March 2015
tree that lacked fruit (Mark 11:20-22) the following day the disciples saw that it was withered from the roots. Peter exclaimed, “Rabbi, look! The fig tree you cursed has withered!” Jesus answered, “Have faith in God.” Clearly, the issue wasn’t the fig tree. His response exposed Peter’s lack of faith. Because out of the overflow of (what’s REALLY in) the heart the mouth speaks (Matthew 12:34). God invites me to be honest, to be authentic, to be real. Both with Him and with others. Especially if, well, there’s nothing laughable about the ominous results of a medical test. Or a failing marriage. Or an incarcerated child. Or a husband’s untreatable cancer. Or a daughter’s infertility. Or an adoption that falls through. Or a financial crisis. Or an aging and demanding parent. Or insults and criticisms...
The thing is, my words may fool you, but God knows what I really mean by what I say. Or, as with Sarah, what I think. He speaks directly to the real intent of my heart knowing that my laughter may have meant I’m diseased by doubt. But next time someone shares a joke with me (like the one about the painter who thinned his paint to make a larger profit until a voice from above instructed, “Repaint! Go and thin no more!”) cut me some slack if I laugh out loud. It could be I truly thought that was funny.
About the Author
Honest, authentic, and real or not, God will answer according to the needs and desires that are really there.
Mary Albers Felkins is a former Registered and Licensed Dietitian turned writer. Throughout the course of her private nutrition consulting business she wrote much of her own teaching materials.
So... ~Do I pray with confidence believing by faith He is able to meet my need? Or do I sound more like an ineffective vacuum salesman: “You wouldn’t want to heal my child, would you?” ~Do I pray with honesty asking exactly what it is I desire or need? Jesus did. In a place called Gethsemane (Matthew 26:39) He asked that the cup of suffering be taken from Him. He stokes the fire of my faith with, “What do you want me to do for you?” (Mark 10:36, 51) And the hardest part... ~Do I accept His answers? Back to Gethsemane. Jesus followed His honest plea with, “Yet not as I will but as You will.” (Matthew 26:39)
Mary is currently constructing her first Christian contemporary romance using principles taught by My Book Therapy (www.mybooktherapy.com). She considers scripture the most alluring romance ever written. She is married to Bruce and they have four (adolescent to young adult-sized) arrows in their quiver. Mary cordialy invites you to take a plunge into the deep oceans of thought or to stop and laugh out loud at her website, www. maryfelkins.com Email contact firstname.lastname@example.org
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I’m an Ezer and Proud of It by Sharon Jaynes
“The LORD God said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him’” (Genesis 2:18 NIV).
Friend to Friend
For thirteen years, our family was blessed with a golden retriever named Ginger. We gave her to our son, Steven, for Christmas when he was five-years-old, and she still holds the blue ribbon as the best present ever. I can still remember the look of surprise on Steven’s cherub face when the “stuffed” animal began to move. “It’s a puppy!” he exclaimed. “It’s not a toy!” And while Ginger was officially Steven’s dog, and I was unofficially her primary caretaker, it was my husband who held a special place in her heart. From the very beginning, Ginger loved my husband the best. Ginger lollygagged her days away by sleeping in the driveway or lounging by the back stoop steps. However, when my husband’s car entered the neighborhood and turned the corner onto our shady Stratfordshire Drive, Ginger’s ears perked up and her eyes began to beam. Suddenly infused with a burst of anticipatory energy, she would jump to her feet and run in circles. “He’s home! He’s home!” she seemed to say. When Steve pulled into the garage and opened his car door, Ginger whined, ran to greet him and rested her head on his left leg while he cooed and rubbed her ears. Steve’s homecoming was the highlight of her day. No wonder dog is called “man’s best friend.” Ginger was loyal, didn’t nag, and loved Steve no matter how much or how little attention he paid to her on any given day. She was very forgiving and almost immediately forgot any injustice such as not giving her table scraps or being left behind when we traveled on vacation. Often at the mere sight of Steve, Ginger rolled over on her back and beckoned him to rub her tummy. She always responded to his touch like it was heaven on earth. What man wouldn’t love such a response from “his girl”? And yet, when God created Adam and placed him in the Garden, only to determine that “It is not good for man to be alone,” He did not create a dog to be his loyal companion. God created a woman to fill the void in Adam’s life. She was called a “helper.” And while you may have one definition in mind when you read the word “helper,” “ezer” is packed with so much more. The Hebrew word that is translated “helper” is “ezer.” This term is derived from a Hebrew word used of God and Holy Spirit: azar. Both mean “helper”—one who comes alongside to aid, assist, or rescue. The ESV Study Bible notes that the “helper” is one who supplies strength in the area that is lacking in the helped. Ezer appears 21 times in the Old Testament. Twice in Genesis it describes the woman (Genesis 2:18, 20). But the majority of references (16 to be exact) refer to God, or Yahweh, as the helper of His people. The remaining three references appear in the books of the prophets, who use it to refer to military aid. So friend, married or not, being an ezer is quite an honor. It is a word denoting great strength.
pg 14 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | March 2015
We would be very remiss if we looked at the word ezer or helper only in domestic terms. Adam didn’t need someone to cook for him, clean up after him, or care for him. That was not the problem. The void in Adam’s life was that he did not have a companion to work with him, rule the earth with him, love with him, procreate with him, and after the fall—struggle with him. A dog might have been an easier adjustment for Adam, but God decided Adam needed someone with words. As an ezer or a strong helper, and one of the best ways we “help” is with our words. So how will we use them? Not just with husbands but with people in general. Will we use them to fortify or flatten, defend or defeat, complete or compete? The choice begins in our minds, runs through our hearts, and responds with our lips. Today, think of the ways you can be the ezer God created you to be.
For the married woman: Dear Lord, I so want to be a good ezer–a good companion that is my husband’s completer. I want to be a helper and not a hindrance. Help me to use my words in such a way that help him to be all that You have created him to be as we work together in life. In Jesus’ name, Amen. For the single woman: Dear Lord, thank You for creating me to be a helper—a strong women who comes along to assist where needed. Give me the right words to say to help others to be all You have created them to be. Help me not to tear down others with my words, but build them up. Help me to speak life into those around me today. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
Now It’s Your Turn
What do you think of when you think of the word “helper”? Why do you think Adam needed a helper? How have you been an ezer to your husband over the past week? (Not geezer, mind you, but ezer.) You might want to ask him some ways that you could help him in the coming days? If you are single, what are some ways that you can be anezer to those around you today? Aren’t you glad that God created you to be a “mighty warrior”—one who comes along to rescue? If so, click over to my Facebook page and say, “I’m an ezer and proud of it!”
More from the Girlfriends
Do you want to become the woman of your husband’s dreams? Would you like a little “wow” back in your relationship with the man you married? Then let seven simple secrets from my book, Becoming the Woman of His Dreams: Seven Qualities Every Man Longs For, transform your marriage. With biblical wisdom and responses from hundreds of men I surveyed, you’ll get a glimpse into your husband’s deepest longings. While you’re there, check out, Praying for Your Husband from Head to Toe. You can even join hundreds of women all around the world in the 30-Day Prayer Dare.
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Submitted by Gary Nance
Who will make the health of our community a priority every single day?
Leading Caldwell Memorial into the future, we will preserve and build upon our 64 year relationship with our community. We
grow thanks to our affiliation with UNC Health Care, we will never forget that this is home. And with a team of more than
will bring the technology you need while always remembering the importance of the human touch. As we change and
700 caring and committed employees and physicians, we will remind ourselves every day that our future is rooted in the
pg 16 | Sophie Womanâ€™s Magazine | March 2015
15CWM0004 BRAND PRIORITY AD 8x5.indd 1
L-R Whitney Hatfield, RN Laura Easton President and CEO David Lowry, MD
personal care that has been the hallmark of Caldwell Memorial. Caldwell Memorial and UNC Health Care, working together to bring you a world of advanced care.
2/10/15 2:25 PM
Shutterbuggerz Submitted by Clara Barnes
Submitted by Angie Houston Submitted by Garland Photography
Submitted by Kristine Putman
Submitted by Precious Memories Photography www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 17
Health to Thrive “SO MANY PEOPLE SPEND THEIR HEALTH GAINING WEALTH, AND THEN HAVE TO SPEND THEIR WEALTH TO REGAIN THEIR HEALTH.” - A. J. MATERI
Spring Clean Your Diet
Spring is just around the corner! It’s so exciting to start to see the crocus pop-up and the sunlight giving us hope that it’s actually going to get warm soon! It’s also a reminder to lighten up, brighter days are ahead! At this time of the year we often think about spring cleaning our homes but this is also a good time to think about spring cleaning our lifestyles. Just like when we start to spring clean our homes we can clean-up our health by making small, sustainable, changes. When we incorporate one small change, or clean out one small closet, and then move on to the next small improvement it doesn’t seem so overwhelming. Below are a few ways we can build health into our bodies so that we have the Health to Thrive!
•Eat from the Earth- Become conscious about consuming foods that aren’t altered from the way in which they grow or live on earth. Typically foods that are in the natural form are healthier for our bodies and are digested more easily. •Processed Foods- Eliminate or greatly reduce the number of processed foods you and your family are consuming. Some processed products have added chemicals and artificial ingredients that aren’t helpful, and in some cases can be harmful, for our bodies. Eliminating processed foods completely can be challenging. Start by reading the ingredient labels. Look for products with 5 or fewer ingredients and make sure the ingredients are words you can pronounce. Instead of having the packaged or frozen dinner, trying making the same dish at home with whole, real ingredients. •Eliminate Artificial Sweeteners- Artificial sweeteners trick the brain into thinking it is receiving something sweet causing the body to anticipate that it will receive calories and therefore the pancreas releases insulin. This confuses the brain and can leave you hungry. Additionally, there have been studies showing artificial sweeteners are both safe and unsafe. When in doubt, leave it out.
•Shop the Perimeter of the Grocery Store- Most fresh produce and meats are kept around the perimeter of the grocery store. Staying in the outside areas eliminates the temptation of all of those colorful boxes, especially if you have children with you! •Omega 3s- Incorporate omega-3s into your diet. A diet rich in omega3s, which are a “smart fat”, help to protect brain and heart health. The brain is made 60% of fat so it’s important, especially for developing brains, to incorporate healthy fats into our diets. We want to make sure we incorporate the healthy fats and eliminate hydrogenated oils, also called trans fats, which have been altered so they have a longer shelf life. Wild salmon, tuna, flax seed, organic eggs and high quality fish oil supplements are good sources of omega-3. •Eat More, Lots More, Fruits and Vegetables- Try to incorporate fruits and vegetables into every meal. Sneak finely diced vegetables and vegetable purees, like canned pumpkin, into soup and chili. Serve a side of cut up fruit with each meal.
pg 18 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | March 2015
•Eat for the Season- Eat what is in season for optimal nutrition that is also more affordable. When fresh produce is picked and transported long distances it starts to lose its nutritional value. Eating produce that is locally grown and in season can have higher nutritional value, helps to support our local farmers and has less of an impact on our environment. For a list of fruits and vegetables that are in season visit http://www.fruitsandveggiesmorematters.org.
The “Dirty Dozen” Apples Strawberries Grapes Celery Peaches Spinach
Sweet Bell Peppers Nectarines- imported Cucumbers Cherry tomatoes Snap Peas- imported Potatoes
My daughter loves this healthy smoothie. I make it for breakfast and I know she has a good nutritional foundation to start to the day.
½ cup organic soy or almond milk 2 Tablespoons non-fat organic Greek yogurt 2 teaspoons honey Handful frozen sliced strawberries 1 banana Blend together in a blender and serve.
•Organic produce and eggs can be more expensive. If your budget allows try to choose organic for at least the “dirty dozen”. Each year the Environmental Working Group ranks produce based on the amount of contamination they contain. Check the list to the left. Eating healthy takes effort and preparation. Start each day with a plan for fueling your body with nutrition throughout the day. Keep snacks such as bags of nuts, apples, oranges and all natural nutrition bars in your purse and at your desk. It’s also good to scope out a few restaurants that you know serve healthier options and suggest those when a friend asks you to lunch. By all means, go to lunch! We all know that catching up with our friends is imperative for optimal health! Like Health to Thrive on facebook to receive free health information.
Dana C. Killian, MBA Certified, Plant-Based Nutrition- eCornell University Dana is passionate about improving awareness around the importance of the food we feed ourselves and our families. Her mission is to equip and encourage women to use their influence to positively affect the health of our families. Dana is married to Jonathan Killian and they have two children, Gavin and Brianna. Like Health to Thrive on Facebook to receive health information and share the health tips that are working for you family.
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Huntersville: 704.987.THIN | www.physiciansplan.com | Hickory: 828.485.2833 www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 19
Submitted by Roxann Lovette
A Tradition of Excellence In a Changing World Partnering with University Christian High School To provide a Preschoolâ€”12th Grade Education
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pg 20 | Sophie Womanâ€™s Magazine | March 2015
Submitted by Heidi Houser Photography Submitted by Charlene Long Photography
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Submitted by Echie Photography
www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 21
Whatâ€™s a Makerspace? To describe them simply, makerspaces are community centers with tools. Makerspaces combine manufacturing equipment, community, and education for the purposes of enabling community members to design, prototype and create manufactured works that wouldnâ€™t be possible to create with the resources available to individuals working alone. These spaces can take the form of loosely-organized individuals sharing space and tools, for-profit companies, non-profit corporations, organizations affiliated with or hosted within schools, universities or libraries, and more. All are united in the purpose of providing access to equipment, community, and education, and all are unique in exactly how they are arranged to fit the purposes of the community they serve. Makerspaces represent the democratization of design, engineering, fabrication and education. They are a fairly new phenomenon, but are beginning to produce projects with significant national impacts.
pg 22 | Sophie Womanâ€™s Magazine | March 2015
LEADERSHIP STATESVILLE 2015
YOU can help MAKE IT happen!
designed to help young people and adults develop
Design & production skills
Critical & creative thinking
Interactive learning skills
3D printing Electronics Robotics Prototyping Sewing Filmmaking Computer programming Digital music recording 3D modeling Arduino/Raspberry Pi Animation Tinkering Creating apps and games Photo/video editing Arts and crafts Inventing
Become a Makerspace Mentor. Donate materials, time, or expertise. Tell others about the project. Make a tax-deductible contribution. Donations of any amount welcome! Make checks payable to the Iredell Friends of the Library and mail to: Greater Statesville Chamber of Commerce Attention: Leadership Statesville 121 N Center Street, Suite 101 Statesville NC 28677 MAKERSPACES
Iredell County Public Library
Join the Makerspace Community!
being developed for the
MAKERSPACES are spaces where people share tools, knowledge, and ideas in an open and collaborative environment.
Want to learn more? Details: Steve Messick at 704.878.3092 or email@example.com or Roxanne Newton at 704.878.4319 or firstname.lastname@example.org
Iredell County Public Library 201 N. Tradd Street, Statesville
Greater Statesville Chamber of Commerce 704.873.2892 www.statesvillechamber.org
www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 23
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For more information, please contact email@example.com or call our ofﬁce at 828-466-0122 Photographers: also ask about information on offering your clients a package deal using your photos! pg 24 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | March 2015
I’m sure you’ve heard the phrase “Keeping up With the Joneses”. Well, the phrase has changed but it means basically the same thing. Now the term is “Trending”. So, are you trending when it comes to your wedding?
I’ll be the first to admit that almost everything has changed when it comes to planning a wedding, from the dress to the honeymoon, nothing will ever be the same. The smart wedding planners, dress designers, retailers and travel agents have all changed their attitude about what a wedding should be. As quoted in the movie, “We’re not in Kansas anymore” and actually, we haven’t been there for quite some time, it just takes some longer to realize it. If you attend a designer wedding fashion show, it becomes apparent that the styles have changed. Usually most of the dresses are a little different from what we are used to and realistically most of us wouldn’t give some of them a second glance. I mean, they are totally weird. But look beyond all the quirkiness and you’ll be able to see things like good design with unique styling, great use of fabrics and even a few new colors. That is what the normal bridal designers go by for the retail market. White wedding dresses are becoming a rarity; most are in shades of ivory and have names like eggshell, candlelight, diamond dust, moonlight and so on. Some of the newest colors this year are the palest shades of blush and mint. Sometimes the colors are so pale that only daylight can show the true color.
Another trend is to see a bride wear multiple dresses on her special day, one for the wedding, another for the reception and sometimes one for her departure. The dress for the reception is usually shorter so the bride can dance with ease. Now we also see the groom shed his coat and tie at the reception which used to be a no-no. The poor guy was expected to suffer for hours during the reception because that was the norm.
As for flowers, I am seeing more and more unstructured bouquets with unique flowers. Some bouquets look like you went to a meadow and just picked your own. More kinds of greenery and fill-ins are being used as well. Of course there will always be those beautiful bouquets made from just one type of bloom, like roses for example. And even though you canâ€™t beat the smell of a fresh bouquet, still about half of brides opt for silk bouquets. Easily understood because they are less expensive and can be done ahead of time.
No longer is a bride expected to have numerous bridesmaids and groomsmen. It used to be that if you had 6 bridesmaids, you had to have 6 groomsmen. Now, you can have as many or as few as you want, AND you can have all one or the other or NONE! More bridesmaids are doing different styles in the same color or shades of a color. This way they can pick a dress style that is more flattering for them.
More couples, especially those that are paying for their own weddings, are delaying their honeymoons for a month or more. They may get a better deal by doing this, especially by avoiding peak travel times. With all the online travel sites, there are great deals out there.
And now to my favorite part-cake, or lack thereof because some brides now are customizing that ever-so-popular part of their wedding. They are doing cheesecake bars, pie bars, ice cream sundae bars, crepe bars and even waffle bars-all instead of the usual cake. And over the past few years cupcake towers have become popular with flavors like maple-bacon, bourbon and decadent chocolate. When I was younger, a wedding reception included the cake, mints and pickles. And yes, I said pickles, because it has long been a Southern thing. My husbandâ€™s family would never have served any kind of cake without offering pickles.
So, are you trending? Mackey S. Carpenter www.mscdesigns.net
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by Judy Smith
My great grandmother lived on a winding mountain road in an old house. I do not exaggerate when I say that her front porch almost touched that road. When we went to visit, we had to park our horse and buggy (just kidding), on a gravel road that ran along one side of the house. We always went on a Sunday when we visited her and traffic, even then, could get pretty heavy from tourists traveling to see Chimney Rock or go to Cherokee. It was somewhat frightening for us kids to walk up to that porch with cars so close to us but that is what we had to do. I absolutely loved my great grandmother even though I don’t remember much about her except her home and her surroundings. She was of Indian decent although I don’t know from which tribe and maybe that is part of the love I had for her. She was mystical to me. She sat in a rocking chair that overlooked that front porch. The house was not much but it was hers. It was very small. When you walked in off the porch, you walked right into her living room and bedroom combined. That rocking chair set between her bed and the window and it was always rocking. It was a fairly long room for the time I supposed, because between the foot of her bed to the far wall was the “couches” and chairs. Just in case you don’t know what a couch is, well, it is a sofa. There was no running water, no bathroom and no refrigerator. She cooked on a wood cook stove and the refrigerated stuff stayed in the creek. I just thought that was so great. When the big wooden bucket was low on water, I would volunteer to run to the creek and fill it up. Now that was some cold refreshing water even though everyone drank from the same silver ladle.
pg 26 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | March 2015
As kids, we had some great times playing behind the house in and around the creek even though we were told over and over not to get in that creek. The memories I have of that time are dim but one memory that never fades is of my great grandmother, always rocking away. She always looked the same, never changing. Hair in a bun on top of her head, a long dress down to her ankles with an apron tied under her breasts because her belly was big… always the same picture. One thing I really hate is I never talked to her much. It was not that I was afraid of her but more about her “REGALness”. I wish I knew her story, her background, how she lived, her childhood, and so many more things. What mysteries would I have found out, what she loved and hated….all the things I could have asked but didn’t! We aren’t interested in those old folks when we are young. Yet, I would not hasten to wager that if you are now my age, that you wish you would have spent more time, asked more questions of someone you only have a few sparse memories of. When we have family get togethers, everyone is always chattering away about the things that are going on right now. Every once in a while, I start to mention something that happened in my childhood and no one pays me any attention. Maybe one day they will want to know more about my childhood and things I experienced….but , we are not guaranteed another day. So kids and grand-kids, you need to fix a meal and invite your weak, feeble grandparents over and ask them some questions before it is too late. Yep, my great grandmother sitting in her rocker, rocking away; Wish I had more memories! I think she is where I got my love for rocking and why I have a rocker on my porch. If your grandparents or even your great grandparents are still alive…..take time to talk and ask them to share their memories. You won’t regret it.
Love, Laughter and Blessings
Listen to your elder's advice, not because they are always right but because they have more experiences of being wrong. Author Unknown
www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 27
! W E N
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Are you welcoming adversity? Probably when you first read the title of this column, you were thinking, why would anyone welcome adversity? Good, then I have gotten your attention. Think about this for a moment. If everything was easy and you just sailed through life, would you feel that you had accomplished much? Chances are, no, you would not. A phrase by Madame Swetchine I have posted in my bedroom so I can see it every night before I go to sleep is: “To every difficult duty there is a charm, known only to those who have the courage to undertake it.” If you expect that you will have some challenges along the way, you are more prepared to accept, shift, ebb and flow. You have courage to face it head on with a belief that you will come out on the other side stronger and wiser.
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Allow COURAGE to be your secret weapon in getting you through a difficult situation or overcome an unexpected challenge: C = Calmness: Allowing your blood pressure or temper to rise only raises your likelihood of failure. Staying calm is your first defense towards finding a solution, because your thoughts will remain lucid and open to possibilities. Whether it is taking deep breaths, meditating or taking a few moments to rest your mind when you are first faced with the situation, allow yourself the gift of calmness to help you put things into perspective. O = Optimism: Believing that the best result will occur is powerful in bringing it into reality. If you only focus on what else could go wrong, then you are allowing fear of the unknown to overpower you. Whenever you are faced with a difficult situation, immediately think about your ideal outcome that would delight you, comfort you, strengthen you, or get you through the situation. U = Understanding: Seek and ye shall find. Our greatest means of understanding what we are going through is to ask questions. Of ourselves. Of others. One of the biggest blunders of most people is making assumptions without any basis of fact. These assumptions grow into worry, doubt, and defeat. Seek to ask questions and allow this inquisitiveness to shed true light on the situation. R = Resiliency: When trying to overcome a challenge, some of what you try may not work out exactly as you had hoped. The old adage, “If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.” is exactly what is necessary. A challenge is placed before you for a reason. Often times, it is the universe’s way of testing just how committed you are to a particular goal. Allow your tenacity to help you be resilient in finding other ways to approach the situation. A = Attitude: Your attitude has a huge impact on your ability to overcome anything you might face. Beyond being optimistic, it also needs to be self aware and encouraging. Sometimes, when you are going through something, you only have yourself in the beginning to turn to, or at least it feels that way. Whenever I am faced with a challenge, reminding myself of these three promises taught to me by my grandmother have never, ever failed me. 1) Find a way or make a way by helping others find a way or make a way; 2) Don’t feel guilty about making life easier for yourself; and 3) Be open to all possible resources and support. These promises enable me to navigate my way through a challenging situation by putting each of them into practice.
pg 28 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | March 2015
G = Gratitude: Being grateful for a challenge is often a hard pill to swallow when you are in the midst of it. However, it is exactly the mindset that will open your thinking up to the possibilities of how to overcome the situation. When you are cursing and complaining, you are closing yourself up and off. When you are appreciating that you will gain more insight, knowledge, strength, confidence, abilities, support or a myriad of other possibilities, you are opening yourself to the probability that you will be successful in the end. E = Enlightenment: The “charm” mentioned in the quote by Madame Swetchine is the enlightenment you will realize as you look back on the challenge that you have overcome. Our ability to learn from what we face or from our mistakes is why there is truly no limit to what we can achieve. Always take a moment after you have realized your outcome to reflect on what you did to get you there. Allow it to sink into your psyche so it will resurface without hesitation to come to your aid again.
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The reality is that each day we are faced with challenges, small and large. The key is to approach life with the expectation that you will have adversity, and with a mindset that you can overcome anything that you encounter along your life’s journey. Welcome adversity and you will realize a charmed life with so very much to appreciate.
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Bio: Sherré DeMao inspires millions through her monthly columns, weekly Insight eZine and national contributing writing. An expert strategist and marketer focused on entrepreneurs, her unique perspective and innovative approach has earned numerous awards regionally, nationally and internationally including being named among the Top 50 Enterprising Women of North America in 2007. Her books, Me, Myself & Inc. (www.memyselfandinc.com) and 50 Who is eligible for U9<?/Erw Individuals who are: Marketing Secrets (www.50marketingsecrets.com) have received national55acclaim as Top Business Shelf picks and must-reads. Aged and older