VOLUME 8 - ISSUE 3 / MAY 2012
Wo m a n ’ s M a g a z i n e
INSIDE: Girlfriends In God ~ Choose Joy | Page 15 Journaling The Journey ~ The Best Hair Cut I’ve Ever Had! | Page 11 Recipes For Life ~ Chocolate Wacky Cake | Page 33 shutterbuggerz pg 42
INSPIRATION ~ EDUCATION ~ MOTIVATION
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Sorry to be so predictable but you know we can’t do a May issue of Sophie Woman’s Magazine and not talk about mothers. Yes, I am sure you have heard this before but I just had to include it, not because it is so profound, not because it is such a great educational piece but because it is so hilariously true! Parenthood changes everything. But parenthood also changes with each baby. Here, some of the ways having a second and third child differs from having your ﬁrst: Your Clothes 1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN conﬁrms your pregnancy. 2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible. 3rd baby: Your maternity clothes are your regular clothes. The Baby’s Name 1st baby: You pore over baby-name books and practice pronouncing and writing combinations of all your favorites. 2nd baby: Someone has to name their kid after your great-aunt Mavis, right? It might as well be you. 3rd baby: You open a name book, close your eyes, and see where your ﬁnger falls. Bimaldo? Perfect!
Pro Winner: Kristen Carol Photography
Preparing for the Birth 1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously. 2nd baby: You don’t bother practicing because you remember that last time, breathing didn’t do a thing. 3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in your 8th month. Worries 1st baby: At the ﬁrst sign of distress - a whimper, a frown - you pick up the baby. 2nd baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten to wake your ﬁrstborn. 3rd baby: You teach your 3-year-old how to rewind the mechanical swing. Activities 1st baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing, and Baby Story Hour. 2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics. 3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaner. Since I have been home more because of my health, I have watched more TV. Not being a hugh TV fan, I am constantly surﬁng channels to ﬁnd worthwhile programming to stimulate my brain. There are so many reality shows on now and you can ﬁnd one for just about anything you want. Since I love babies, I have stumbled across some that involves childbirth. I watch with horror as they yank them itty-bitty fragile bodies from the mothers and ﬂip um around like pancakes on a griddle. Oh my! Mothers are. We should come with a warning: “kids handle with care”. A mothers heart can be so easily broken without a single word being uttered. Kids, no matter your age, let your Mother know you love her and that you appreciate her. Even if she is not a good Mother, she gave you life. Maybe it was not a stable one, or a life where much love was shown, but you have the choice as to what you do with your life. Choose to respect and love your Mother. The beneﬁts will be yours! fragile as we think at ﬁrst and that is why we lighten up with the second or third one. So, I think there needs to be a reality show about how fragileThe more experienced we are though, we learn babies are not as Ephesians 6 tell us “ Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother,” which is the ﬁrst commandment with promise: “that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.”
Amateur Winner: Josh Kirby
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Message From The Heart......................................pg 3 Reaching Your Full Potential................................pg 7 How To Be Fabulous............................................pg 8 JournalingThe Journey...........................................pg 11 The Fly Lady........................................................pg 13 Girlfriends In God...............................................pg 15 Health & Fitness Tips..........................................pg 16 Mandy’s Misadventures......................................pg 19 The Dinner Diva..................................................pg 20 Sophisticated Women..........................................pg 23 Decisions That Affect A Lifetime.......................pg 24 Me, Myself, & Inc...............................................pg 27 Look Who’s Knocking At The Door...................pg 28 It’s All About The Bling......................................pg 31 Recipes For Life..................................................pg 33 Truth & Beauty....................................................pg 35 Help! My Husband Is A Packrat.......................pg 36 Girls On The Run..............................................pg 39 The Wedding Season..........................................pg 40 Shutterbuggerz.....................................................pg 42
*Coming Soon* SUBSCRIPTIONS We have been asked by many of our readers to offer a subscription to Sophie Woman’s Magazine. If you would like more information about a subscription, please visit our website at:
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********************************************************** Disclaimer: Sophie Woman’s Magazine LLC is published monthly. The articles published in Sophie do not necessarily reﬂect the opinions of the publisher. All articles are intended for informational purposes only, and none should serve as a substitute for doctor’s advice and orders. Advertisers are solely responsible for the content and validity of information published within their ads and are not necessarily endorsed by the publisher. Deceptive or misleading advertising is not knowingly accepted by the publisher. Advertising is accepted with the understanding that all liability for copyright violations is the sole responsibility of the advertiser. All material submitted for publication is considered to be the sole property of the advertiser. Sophie Woman’s Magazine LLC’s publishers, staff, and other persons involved in the creation, production, or delivery of the magazine (in whatever format) or ti’s content, do not assume any liability or responsibility for the accuracy, completeness, or usefulness of any information provided in the magazine, nor shall they be liable for any direct, indirect, incidental, special, consequential, or punitive damages arising out of the use of the magazine. **********************************************************
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pg 6 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | May 2012
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A few years ago, I had the honor of writing a book with one of my dearest friends. One of the stories was inspired by one of my favorite things: a convertible. The ‘top down’ weather of our early spring has already gifted me with many days of driving adventure. In that spirit of adventure, I bring you this excerpt from my ﬁrst book, Don’t Miss Your Boat: Living Your Life with Purpose in the Real World. I have always liked having the wind in my hair, whether on skis, in a at help boat or in a convertible. On the contrary, I have never understood people who tolerate hair styles that take hours to put in place and lots of energy March 31. to maintain. I had a convertible years ago, 1991 to be exact. It was a cute little red Miata, a pint-sized car built for two tiny people who like to travel light… life was just different when I had that car. The simplest trip became an adventure. I have even been spotted with the top down and the heater geared to high, driving in snow ﬂurries while dressed for an Alpine weekend. Then came the safe car… the artist in me refers to this as my ‘safe period’. The wind gave way to safety and practicality. The contrast between my ‘adventure period’ and my ‘safe period’ parallels an interesting contrast in my life. I am going to suggest that some of us get stuck living in our ‘safe years’. We concern ourselves with the agenda others have set for us. We live on the safe side of our ss than the ultimate level of integrity simply because people expect less d. All trademarks of us there. We settle for the status quo. We start to believe that we don’t need to try harder when a higher standard of excellence seems to be a dying art. We never quite tap into 0/11 12:14 our PM brilliance, continuing to do things that are not fulﬁlling rather than investing more time and energy into using our natural gifts and pursuing our passions. When we choose the safe ride, the scenery is limited and the adventure is curbed as we settle for safe practicality. We protect ourselves from failure by never taking the risks we hear our hearts calling us toward. We keep signiﬁcant people at arm’s length, refusing to make the investment to build healthy relationships. My tiny topless car was not the safest vehicle I ever owned. The way I am currently living is also not the safest way I have ever lived. In the past decade, I have re-deﬁned many aspects of my life, following my heart and Spirit. I left a well-established career as a physical therapist and college instructor to pursue my passion of investing in others as a Life Coach, Author and Speaker. I allowed God to re-align my priorities in relationships, a daring act which just might change who you keep company with. I made the decision to move beyond mere religion to chase after the Spirit in a way which allows me to hear and follow the voice of God in my moment-bymoment life. With healthy risks come great rewards… and great adventure! God has blown into my life, much like the wind one experiences in a convertible. He offers a life which hugs tightly to the curves of personal excellence
and integrity. He offers a willingness to choose to forgive and love in the midst of our greatest hurts. Life will hand you broken relationships, failed professional pursuits, detoured dreams, and crushed hearts. At these crossroads, we are faced with the critical decision as to whether we will play it safe or dive into the wind. I never quite got over parting with the little red, highly inconvenient means of transportation. In fact, today, the safe car is long gone, replaced by a dark green Miata I affectionately named Makena (one of my favorite Maui beaches). It is my hope that you will grab hold of adventure and authentic faith with me. Get out there, put the top down on life. Take a turn down the winding road of discovering and developing your untapped potential. The same wind with the power to mess up your hair is the same wind which blows positive change into your heart and new opportunities into your path. ■
Kim Fletcher is a Life Coach, Speaker and three-time Author of global impact. She and her team at Kim Fletcher Associates love bringing true transformation to the personal and professional lives of their clients. This article was adapted from Kim’s ﬁrst book. Contact her directly to learn more about her newest release, The Tension Point: Breaking Through To Where You Want To Be. 828 327 6702 /
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www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 7
FABULOUS....OVER 40! HOW TO BE
pg 8 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | May 2012
to me by my 16 year old,”I know everything”, daughter). This was ok with me until Renee (Fab friend) said to me...”You are over 40... no one over 40 should have writing on their butt”. And, of course, my teenage daughter had picked out the same exact item. Yes, that point was not lost on Renee...as she snickered to herself. Hmmm... now I had an issue. The cute and comfy sweatpants were PERFECT for my lazy day at home/barn... and now, BECAUSE I’M 40-ish, I can’t wear them??? Oh, heck no. Then again, I didn’t get them. As much as I hate to admit it...they didn’t look right on me. But here’s the thing... writing on the rump of a pant is kinda tacky on ANYONE. So, is it really the age thing?? I think not. While Renee is the one who simply HAD to say my age out loud, she is over 40 (YES, this is in PRINT!!! lol)...and pretty dang cool. She wears hot cowboy boots with little dresses! Soooooo...I will forgive her. Bottom line...How do we make sure to be fab over 40?? Be ourselves. Our conﬁdent, independent, sexy selves. That’s all. Girls, we are like a ﬁne wine...expensive! Oh wait, I mean...we get better with age!!! However, There are a few fashion/beauty tips for us “experienced” women... 1. The right ﬁt. This is so important when every body part may not be exactly where it’s supposed to be! Get to know your alterations person ladies!!! 2. Color. It’s ok to be ﬂashy when it comes to bright hues. Just pick a classic cut in the item you choose to ‘pop’. 3. Shoes. If you want to be HOT, you may have to suffer a tad. Wedges are your best bet for comfort yet complete sexiness. Photo Courtesy of www.NicholLancaster.com
Charlize Theron, Jen Anniston, Cameron Diaz, Halle Berry...The list goes on. HOT women over 40. Yes, ladies, we are smokin’...just sayin’. Forty is the new 30, and mature women are well aware of their power over fashion, society, and of course...men. My husband, Bob, was staring at a Smart Water ad with the utmost interest the other day. Me, being quite the curious one, asked what was so fascinating?? Hmmm...I should have known. He looked up timidly (I tend to be a little threatening ;)) and said “Well, uhmmm, Jen is... uhmm, kinda, uhmm...pretty.” My response? Was it “How dare you look at another woman??”...no. Was it “Don’t you think I’M pretty??”... nope. My response...”GREAT! Oh my goodness, you get her...then her and I can be besties!!!!” See, a woman over 40 is over the jealousy drama...I was just thinking that if Jen got to know me, we would be BFF’s! We would hang at movie premiers, have fabulous vino on the beach, and be life long buddies. Hmmm... I remember when I used to think that if certain handsome male celebs met me, they would fall head over heals and want to marry me! Now, at 40 something, I have those fantasies about really cool friends!!! lol! That said, I started thinking about the really beautiful famous chicks in the world. I realized, to my pleasant surprise, that MOST were over 40! So what does a woman ‘of a certain age’ have that younger women strive for? I believe there are a few key ingredients. The ﬁrst being conﬁdence. Life experience is, well, sexy. I, personally, am so much more comfortable walking into a room than as a young girl. Chin up, long strides, little sway, little swag ;)...ya...I AM WOMAN! Do I care if the sweet little girl with the man twice her age (ok, ya, I went there) is rockin’ that tight little black dress??? Uh, NO. Cause sweetie, I’m in red. Independence. Nothing is more attractive than a woman who can hold her own. Now don’t think I’m opening up my own car door anytime soon! I’m not talkin’ about doing away with chivalry. I’m talking about the fact that if I WANTED to open that door...I could. In fact, I can do anything my lil’ heart desires. THAT is the independence found in a woman with a bit of history behind her! I was told the other day that I was not allowed to wear any piece of clothing that had writing on the, uh, ‘behind’ (This point was stressed
Remember, there will always be ‘younger’ women...but, so what??? I wouldn’t go back to my 20’s for anything! lol. Be strong, take charge, and be the best woman you can be. Oh, and honey, at my age... I can ride a horse like a real cowgirl...while sipping Smart water. ;)
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www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 9
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Journaling The J urney
by Judy Smith
I shared a little with you last month on how I live with a day planner. It is still the old fashioned kind….days, months, times…the one you write in. Years ago, when the Palm ﬁrst came out, I was so eager to get one of those new contraptions. My husband bought me one for my birthday and I spent so much time plugging every thing in. How wonderful, I thought, not having to carry around a big old bulky planner. The excitement lasted for only a very short period. Nothing wrong with the Palm, just the Palm user. I didn’t sync it or now that I think of it, maybe I did, if you want to spell that “sink”. Neither did I keep it charged. Guess what happened when I let it go dead? All of my appointments “sunk” into the abyss. That was it for me. Big, bulky, hard copy with all my sloppy handwriting is the only device for me! Cancer certainly has changed the content of the entries though. Last year, it was ﬁlled with business meetings, organizational commitments, luncheons with friends, church events, family functions and hopefully a vacation thrown in the mix. This year it is ﬁlling up with Doctors appointments, chemo treatments, lab work and more Doctors appointments. I am ﬁnding it a struggle to even plan anything that does not involve cancer; even family events that I treasure. From the very beginning, I told myself I would do everything I could to go to church. I am ﬁnding that I might not be able to do that as much as I hoped for. All the things they tell you about how chemo effects your sleep, sickness, constipation or diarrhea...all true. It is still all sort of new to me so I am trying to ﬁgure out if there is somewhat of a cycle with the chemo. Days that I will feel better and days that I won’t be on top of the world, but I don’t know that yet. Let me tell you about my hair! Now when I told some friends that I was going to do this, I think they thought the chemo had already went to my brain. I have been told that not everyone loses their hair but with the kind of chemo that I am taking, that I should pretty much expect it. My hairdresser knows when it is time for my cut
and style that it is to be “hair with attitude”. Some people had asked me if I was going to shave my head but I just ﬁgured I would get Julie to cut it really, really short. So, now I ﬁgured it was time. Emotionally, I just did not feel like I would be able to handle it coming out in clumps in my hand or on my pillow. Then it hit me. Little girls love to cut hair…… granddaughters….are you getting the picture? Remember, I am all about making memories. So I gave scissors to two of my granddaughters and told them to have fun. Barbie dolls move over! We laughed, I got a haircut and the memory of a lifetime. So how does it look? It is the best haircut I have ever had (sorry Julie). I had a really good day this past week and on that particular day was a monthly meeting for an organization I belong to. Did I wrap my head in a scarf or wear a wig… not on your life. I wore that haircut with so much pride. Proud that I am so blessed to have a husband, children and grandchildren that we share the good with the bad and that love overcomes any bad that could possibly happen. Anyone need a haircut? I can pencil you in in my old fashioned journal!
www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 11
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by Marla Cilley
Decorating On The Fly! Did you ever glance at those well-lit pictures in a magazine and wish for a room that looked as inviting as the images in their pages. We want the feel of those pictures but we have no clue where to start to accomplish it. Don’t feel bad because I can help you get started on your dream home and it can be done in baby steps. Our biggest problem is that we don’t know where to start! We see the beautifully put together rooms and we get overwhelmed. Then we put the magazine down and give up before we ever get started. I was scared to death to remodel our home. When Robert and I married in 1996; I had a houseful of clutter and so did he. We put our clutter together and then went to estate auctions to buy more. We called ourselves upgrading the furniture that we already had. Oh we got some great deals but it is so hard to see what you have when your home is ﬁlled with clutter. It was only when we started to get rid of our clutter that we could selectively know what we needed to purchase. It took us about nine months to slowly eliminate our clutter. I like to think of it as giving birth to a new me. As the clutter disappeared I could see in my mind’s eye what I wanted for our home and not the piles of stuff that clouded my vision. I began to feel the peace that I had always searched for and it was hiding underneath my hot spots. Slowly our home became clutter free and peaceful. It still was not decorated as those pictures in the magazines, but it hugged us when we walked in the door. Even with the green shag carpet from the seventies our home was inviting and my routines were helping me to keep our home company ready just for us. This was a blessing but it also created another level of fear in me. With the clutter gone we could see that our home needed updating. Every room in our home needed help. We could actually see the forest for the ﬁrst time. We looked closely at each room. I took a note pad and put on a different set of eyes to examine our home. Just imagine that you are a real estate agent and you are going to help your client get their home ready to sell. Grab a clipboard and your pen. I am going to walk you through your home.
We started with our one butt kitchen and our coppertone appliances. I began to jot down everything that I felt made our home outdated. Then we looked at the outside of our home, our bathrooms, living room, bedrooms and back deck. We examined our heating unit and our side porch. Then we went to dinner to discuss what to do ﬁrst. This was so frightening to me. I was afraid of allowing the clutter and CHAOS to invade our home again. Once I realized that I could do this by taking baby steps and by taking care of me during this process; I was willing to take the next step. You can do this too with your routines in place to guide you and by ﬂinging your clutter so that you have a clean palette to start with. You will be surprised at how much better your home will feel when you love yourself enough to take baby steps. I will be telling you more about this in the future. Many people have this same problem and we want to help you all have the conﬁdence to make your home feel comfortable. The best compliment I have ever received is that our home looks just like us. This is because we only have things in our home that make us smile. Are you ready to FLY into building your dream home one baby step at a time? For more help getting rid of your CHAOS, check out her website and join her free mentoring group at www.FlyLady.net or her book, Sink Reﬂections published by Random House and her New York Times Best Selling book, Body Clutter published by Simon and Schuster. Copyright 2012 Marla Cilley Used by permission in this publication.
www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 13
Motherâ€™s Wishing You A Very Happy
210 13th Ave Pl NW Hickory, NC 28601 / 828 322-3017
C.F. McDonell, Jr., M.D.
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Choose Joy by Mary Southerland
James 1:2-3 Whenever trouble comes your way, let it be an opportunity for joy. For when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow (NLT).
Friend to Friend
When golf balls were ﬁrst manufactured, their covers were smooth. Golfers soon discovered that after the balls had been roughed up a bit, they were able to get more distance out of them. Manufacturers then began producing golf balls with dimpled covers. Life is a lot like that. It takes some rough spots to make us go our farthest. It takes some storms to teach us that God is faithful and will provide the strength to stand ﬁrm. The Apostle Paul knew all about storms. As a fully devoted follower of Christ, Paul was despised, slandered, mistreated, abused and poor. He had every right to be angry and distressed but instead chose joy. “We own nothing, and yet we have everything” (2 Corinthians 6:8-10 NLT). I never fully understood the amazing truth behind Paul’s words because I had never really lived their truth – until 1995 – when I found myself sitting at the bottom of a deep, dark pit. Clinical depression, the psychologist called it. The name was irrelevant to me. All I knew was that it was the most hellish place I had ever been and I had absolutely no idea how to escape. I was paralyzed and totally helpless – the perfect setting for a miracle. Sitting at the feet of Jesus, stripped of my human efforts and impotent plans, I discovered the life changing truth that He did not come to eliminate the storms in my life. No - He came to ﬁll those storms with His presence. I was not delivered from that pit until I was delivered in that pit. Because joy is a deeply-rooted conﬁdence that God is in control, it only stands to reason that the highest joy will come through the greatest pain. The greater the pain, the more we are forced to search for and cling to the hand of God. But that only happens when we choose the right attitude toward pain. James 1:2-3 Whenever trouble comes your way, let it be an opportunity for joy. For when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. (NLT) When was the last time you threw a party to celebrate the trials and storms in life? God’s ways are higher than our ways and most human reactions are in direct opposition to the paradoxical ways of God. Honestly, there are times when what He has asked me to do simply does not make sense – to me. And there we ﬁnd the problem. Faith is a matter of blind obedience, not human logic. At the heart of every storm is victory – waiting to be claimed. The words of James offer the perfect backdrop for every life storm. My son, Jered, was a beautiful baby. One Easter I took him to Sears for their “Get a million pictures for $2.99” deal. Expecting the studio to be crowed, I was met by one bored photographer thrilled to see his ﬁrst customers. Jered always loved having his picture made and put on quite a show. After the advertised special pictures were taken, the photographer asked, “Listen, I don’t have any appointments today and really need some new pictures for wall displays. Would you mind if I took more pictures of Jered?” What mother is going to say, “I don’t want my child’s
face plastered on every wall of this studio?” Not this proud mama. We went to work. The photographer handed me a box of clothes, asking me to choose several different outﬁts for Jered. First was a tuxedo. No, I am not kidding you. The photographer pulled down a silver backdrop, making Jered’s curly, black hair stand out and his blue eyes dance. Next was the blue snow suit against a red backdrop. With every backdrop, Jered’s appearance changed and an eternal truth lodged in my heart. We have a different backdrop for every life experience. It is a manger – a cruel cross – an empty tomb – and eternity itself. That backdrop changes everything. It makes our hearts sing and our souls dance with the truth that we can always count on His joy in us to face the storms around us.
Father, I come to You, asking for the strength to withstand the storm in my life. Forgive me for giving in to the fear and doubt instead of turning to you in faith. I now turn to You, Lord. I choose to lean on You. Show me the way. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
Now It’s Your Turn
What storm is raging in your life today? What step do you need to take in order to experience His strength for that storm? Your Father stands ready to meet you in your darkest hour. He longs to wrap His arms around you until the winds die down and the waves are stilled. Right now – surrender. Yield to His presence and power. Celebrate the storm that dashed your battered life on the shores of His unyielding love.
More from the Girlfriends
Need help learning how to study the Bible? Check out one of Mary’s E-Bible Studies for practical steps you can take to strengthen your faith and ﬁnd answers to the problems you face every day. Titles include Strength for the Storm, God’s Answer to Stress, Getting a Grip on Fear and more. Join other women across the world in Mary’s Online Bible Study, Light for the Journey. How to Tame the Tongues the current series. Check it out! Need a friend? Connect with Mary on Facebook or through email. She loves hearing what God is doing in your life!
Seeking God? To ﬁnd out more about how to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. Girlfriends in God P.O. Box 725 Matthews, NC 28106 firstname.lastname@example.org www.girlfriendsingod.com www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 15
TABATA EXERCISES 1. Exercise Number One- Grasshoppers: Step One-Get into push up position. Step Two- Bring your right foot diagonally across to your left hand
by Sharon Rashidi B.S. Health Education
FOUR MINUTES TO A FITTER YOU! I just ﬁnished teaching my ﬁrst Tabata training class, and it was intense! Do you want to get in shape but do not have much time to spare? Are you looking for a short workout that will improve your cardiovascular endurance, increase your speed and strength, burn fat, and get you in the best shape possible all at the same time? Then Tabata training might be the answer for you. Tabata training is not a new workout. It actually originated in Japan in 1996 named after its founder Dr. Izumi Tabata. Working with Olympic Speed Skaters, he conducted an experiment that proved short high intensity intervals work better than hour long jogging sessions to improve both your aerobic and anaerobic capacity. Aerobic capacity is a measure of your body’s ability to consume oxygen. The more oxygen you can take in, the longer and harder you will be able to run. Anaerobic capacity measures your speed endurance, think sprinting. The workout includes a 5 minute warm-up, followed by 20 seconds of work/10 seconds of rest cycles. Complete the 20/10 cycles 8 times for 4 minutes total time spent on each exercise. This is called one round. That’s it! A heart pounding, fat scorching workout in only four minutes! Start off with just a couple of 20 second work/10 second rest rounds and work your way up to 8 using different exercises for each round. Any whole body exercise can be incorporated. In class, we actually completed eight rounds and then did a bonus round. Everyone was able to work at their own pace, completing as many repetitions that they could in the 20 second work phase. If you have never exercised before, start off with a basic exercise such as high knees in place. You might think that doing eight rounds of the intervals will be no problem. Depending on the exercises that you choose to do, it may take several weeks to work up to eight rounds. Work as hard as you can and do as many repetitions as possible in the 20 second work phase. Gradually, you will be able to increase the number of rounds you can complete. Incorporate weights, kettle bells, bands, and even your own body weight to increase the intensity as you progress.
pg 16 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | May 2012
Step Three- Alternate by bringing your left foot to your right hand. Tips- Modify this exercise, by coming down to your hands and knees. Remember to work at your own pace and complete as many as you can in the twenty second work phase.
Step 3 2. Exercise Number Two- Bottom-Half Squats: Step One- Pretend that you are going to sit down in a chair and come down to a squat position with your body weight on your heels.
Step Two- For twenty seconds, stay in squat position and pulse. In the ten second rest phase, just hold bottom. Tips- Modify this exercises, by not going down as deep in your squat. To add intensity, hold hand weights or even a kettle bell. . Remember to work at your own pace and complete as many as you can in the twenty second work phase.
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So, Savannah can read.
I know that this should be a joyous occasion in my life. Like, maybe I should be all proud and weepy because my baby has now advanced to the world of literacy, right? Instead, I’m ﬁnding myself hiding out in the linen closet to send e-mails, carefully choosing my next read to ensure its proper coolness, and being sure that blankets are nearby in case of a sneak attack over the shoulder peep. It’s not that I’m looking at things I shouldn’t, it’s more the endless commentary on what I’m reading or writing. “Moo-OOOM!” she’ll wail out of nowhere, scaring me half to death with the sheer volume of her voice. “You can’t be friends with elves! They don’t exist!” “Yes huh!” I’ll say, ever so maturely, half of my attention on the argument and the other terriﬁed that I might actually be having a real live heart attack. “This book is a fantasy book, Savannah! I bet you didn’t read that, did you?” Of course, then I have to go into what fantasy is and make sure to explain that just because I love The Lord of the Rings and often wonder what it would be like to speak elven does not make me a dork. But, you know, I suppose that I should be a little bit excited for her. After all, she’s been so thrilled with her progress - loudly reading anything from menus at restaurants to the feminine product machine in the ladies bathroom at Target. It’s been really fun to watch her giggle when she gets it right, and those big, toothy grins she gives me when I tell her she’s done a great job are well worth the jokes at my reading taste. Plus, the whole dilemma of having to explain why Savannah can’t put a quarter in the Tampax machine and get candy out has kind of resolved itself. Maybe reading does have its perks, after all.
www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 19
Dinner Diva The
By Leanne Ely CNC
Simple Skillet Sauce Did you know you can make a simple sauce in the skillet? Honest, this is easy stuff! Just follow these easy steps... Let’s pretend for a moment, you’ve just sautéed some chicken and veggies. The chicken is nicely cooked as are your veggies. Pull the chicken and veggies from the pan and place on a warm plate and keep warm (I turn my oven on to the lowest temp and then put a very loose foil tent “hat” on top of what I just sautéed. I don’t tuck the sides of the foil in; just let it rest on top to preserve the heat. If you tuck it all in, it will steam and lose its sautéed appeal). On the bottom of your pan, you’re going to see all kinds of browned up stuff from the chicken and veggies or what I refer to quite often as “browned goodie bobs”. This is concentrated ﬂavor that will make for an exquisite sauce. To make sauce, you will need liquid. I like to add chicken broth (adds more ﬂavor and body than just plain water). I also might add a little wine, depending on what I’ve just cooked. The deal is you’re going to use the liquid to pull the
stuff up off the bottom and incorporate into the liquid using your trusty wire whisk. Anyway, you’re going to crank the heat up somewhat (not too high or the liquid will all evaporate too fast) and whisk the bottom of the pan like your life depended on it. Your liquid will start to turn a little brown (from incorporating the goodie bobs) and next thing you know, you’ll have something that starts to look like a sauce emerging. Now we’re cooking! Isn’t this the coolest?? When I made my ﬁrst sauce like this, I felt like I could do anything in the kitchen. It’s really that empowering, really! At this point, you may have enough liquid, too much liquid or not enough. The remedies are simple, if it’s just right, pull it from the heat, arrange your chicken and veggies on a serving plate and pour a portion of the sauce over the top. If you have too much liquid, then you will bring your sauce down to a simmer and let the sauce reduce via evaporation. Now if you let it reduce a lot, you’ll make your sauce instead into a reduction, which is just really a concentrated sauce and for our purposes right now, you don’t need to go there. If you don’t have enough liquid, then add just a little more chicken broth (or your liquid of choice) and whisk away till you get the desired consistency. Whew! There you have it, Saute 101, complete with a lovely sauce. How’s that for an explanation? Are you feeling good about your skillet now? I hope so! Have FUN!
Leanne Ely is a New York Times bestselling author of Body Clutter and the Saving Dinner series. The Dinner Diva syndicated newspaper column appears in 250 newspapers nationwide. Learn how to cook great and save signiﬁcant money with the Dinner Diva?s menus, recipes and shopping lists at www.savingdinner.com
pg 20 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | May 2012
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SophisticatedAreWomen... On A Quest By Nicole Greer, PPCC Founder and Principle Coach at Vibrant Coaching
A quest is simply a state of mind that holds a question: • A question that begs for investigation • A question that challenges the status quo • A question that brings clarity • A question that must be answered • A question that ultimately brings learning in service to expanding your capacity in service to the world… Being sophisticated dictates that the sophisticated woman is highly developed, aware, and able to interpret complex issues. Just think about your week so far. You’ve worked diligently, cared for family, consoled friends, fought with the economy, battled health issues, overcome emotional distress, discovered a way to meet an impossible deadline, engineered some positive outcomes, and right now you are managing to ﬁnd some time to take care of yourself by stealing a moment of inspiration from Sophie Woman’s Magazine. Hello! You understand complex issues. While this is undeniably amazing, you, a sophisticated woman, must be conscious to embrace a quest. May I propose that your life long quest is to question your own purpose and potential? The question you must hold with intention is: What is my capacity? The ﬁrst step in exploring your capacity is to turn to wonder. Coaching philosophy teaches that when you are feeling anxious, overwhelmed, bored, tired, frustrated or irritable simply stop. Be curious about the cause. Wonder allows you to be open to learning about the obstacles in your way. Your ambition ironically is to slow down to the speed of your life to examine what is going on. Have you wondered lately why you are doing the things you are doing? Do you ﬁnd yourself wondering what living someone else’s life would be like? Do you wonder what tomorrow will hold? If you have answered ‘no’ to any of these questions, it’s time to wake up to wonder. You need a personal learning plan. A personal learning plan is imperative to engage your capacity. A clearly articulated expansion of your capabilities opens up the possibilities and allows you to lean into or wonder about your capacity. In other words, a personal learning plan takes your possibilities and turns them in probabilities. A personal learning plan has ﬁve focus areas: spiritual, intellectual, vocational, emotional, and physical. Within each of these ﬁve focus areas in mind, answer the following questions:
• What have I experienced in this focus area of my life that is notable? • In light of my experiences, what is my current capacity? • I wonder what else I am capable of? • What do I need to learn to increase my capacity? • How will I ﬁnd my answers? • What is my next right step? With these questions addressed, you’ll ﬁnd yourself conscious with a learning plan in place. In fact, you might ﬁnd yourself in admiration of where you’ve been. Or perhaps you’ll be in awe of what you are capable of. You may even marvel at what your future holds. I recently attended the Academy of Spiritual Formation. This was part of my quest or personal learning plan in the focus area of spirituality. I had the pleasure of sitting at the feet of Father Richard Rohr, a Franciscan Priest, author and founder of the Center for Action and Contemplation. In preparation for the retreat, I read his book, The Naked Now: Seeing as the Mystics See. Mystics are professionals at turning to wonder. Rohr extols the power of wonder when he states, “wondering is a word connoting at least three things: standing in disbelief, standing in the question itself, and standing in awe before something.” I want the capacity to do the latter. I want to step back from my life and be in awe of it. Consciously creating a personal learning plan has enabled me to celebrate that I long for more, have consciousness that there is more, and shout to the world that they too can wonder about their own personal more! Rohr urged me from the pages “try letting all three standings remain open inside of you.” I am on a quest to do just that. Will you join me? I wonder.
At its deepest level, working with a coach frees you to indentify your birthright gifts, discern your deepest passions, and fulﬁll your highest purpose. A coach can pry you off dead center. As Principal Coach for Vibrant Coaching and Workshop Leader for The Lydia Group, LLC, a collaboration of individuals focused on work, life and spiritual growth, Nicole is on a mission to impact, energize, and inﬂuence people to lead a Vibrant Life by engaging the possibilities. As a life and business coach and workshop leader, Nicole views her role as a conduit to release all that you want to achieve. Join me on the PATH to move forward with authenticity, skill and conﬁdence. www.thevibrantcoach.com/www. thelydiagroup.com
www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 23
Every big decision we make affects our lives in a way far greater than we can know. We have the bittersweet blessing of freewill. We get to decide things for ourselves. Nine years ago, at age 17, I decided to keep the baby I was carrying and raise him. It was the hardest decision I have ever had to make. I knew as a young mom I would face a lot of hard challenges. Being a child and raising a child is a huge commitment. A young mother faces heartache, ﬁnancial issues, selfesteem issues and becomes part of a huge stereotype along with the task of taking care of a newborn. This, naturally, was not the path I had always dreamed of taking. I was from a great home with wonderful parents and I was a good student. I made the decision, with my freewill, to have sex before marriage. The result of that decision was the conception of my son. I decided soon after he was born that I was going to be one mom who would break the stereotype of teenage moms. With the help of my parents I decided in August 2003, two weeks after my son was born, to attend Lenoir-Rhyne [College] University. I majored in middle school education. It wasn’t easy taking care of a newborn and starting my college career. This experience was a time of major growth for me both spiritually and academically. In may 2007 I received my Bachelor of Arts degree. I decided that I would give my son the best opportunities I could by getting my education myself. Were these decisions easy? No! Did I want to be the “typical” 18 year old girl? Yes! I got married to a wonderful,
pg 24 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | May 2012
kind-hearted man in July 2011, a blessing. He has a son from a previous relationship; we have a sweet little family. I am teaching high school science and math at a christian academy. I have a job that I enjoy waking up to go do. Very few people can say they love their job. All of the decisions I made came with a consequence. It is what one takes from the results that matters. I am starting a teen mom ministry. My goal is to help young mothers break the stereotypes and change the statistics. Google teen mom statistics and you get a huge amount of hits that are all doom and gloom. With the help of my church were are going to reach out to these girls and help them be the best moms they can be. Teen moms need to have a place where they feel accepted and loved, where they can vent their frustrations to another who is experiencing the same things. Every decision we make is guided by our free will. Thankfully, my heart was fully given to God 8 years ago. God has been my guide since then. Without faith, awesome parents, and an amazing support system, who knows what decisions I might have made? If you are making wrong choices, decide today to break the cycle. You too can turn to the One who will be the best guide, cheerleader, supporter, counselor, teacher, and helper you can imagine! Give your heart to God and be prepared to SOAR! blessed beyond belief, Brittany Swanson
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Me, Myself, & . c In By Sherré DeMao
Do you feel incomplete?
As women, we are expected to juggle and manage a great deal through our busy lives. As a result, it is easy and almost expected that we will feel overwhelmed by all that needs to be done. We also are focused on everyone else’s needs oftentimes negating our own wants, desires and passions. The problem with this is that then we are not allowing our best selves to step forward to fully embrace and enjoy our lives and work. We get to a point where we are literally going through the motions, yet feeling a bit incomplete and frustrated in the process. If this sounds like you, the reason you may be frustrated in your work or your life is because you are not honoring the three aspects of you and all that you can be. These three aspects are what this column is all about: Me, Myself and Inc. It is time to delve deeper into bringing the best of all of three of YOU into synergized being to realize your best life. Take this assessment to identify the missing aspects of you that need to be brought back into being. Check the statements below, which apply to you, then reference the key that follows: 1. I enjoy regular and meaningful interaction with family members. 2. I enjoy regular and meaningful interaction with friends. 3. I enjoy meaningful and intimate interaction with a spouse or signiﬁcant other. 4. I enjoy and explore the community in which I live and work with my friends, family, spouse or signiﬁcant other. 5. I make it a priority to allocate time for myself on a regular basis so I can recharge, refocus and relax. 6. I have hobbies or things I like to do just for me and my own self expression, self development and fulﬁllment. 7. I believe that taking care of me is a priority and therefore I regu larly exercise and eat right to nourish my mind, spirit and being. 8. I enjoy and regularly learn new things and explore new ideas or places alone and with others as a way of continually bringing more to my life and my work. 9. I look forward to going to work each day and cannot wait to see what the day brings in both challenges and opportunities. 10. I believe that I am doing exactly what I was meant to do as a profession and get great satisfaction from the work that I do. 11. I gain great satisfaction and inspiration from the people I work with and do business with who reinforce that the work I do makes a difference. 12. I have developed friendships through work that are meaningful and valued, but also have a network of friends outside of work that is stimulating and important in my life. ME – The friends, family and community YOU If you checked 1, 2, 3 and 4 …… you have embraced and are enjoying this aspect of you.
If any one of these were not checked, this is where you are not being fulﬁlled and could be part of your frustration. Take a look at what you did check to see how you can potentially create opportunities for bringing the ones not checked into reality. If you did not check any in this area, it is time to reconnect with this aspect of you by reaching out to family, friends, and your community to stimulate regular and meaningful interaction and participation in your life. MYSELF – The individual YOU If you checked 5, 6, 7, and 8 …… you have embraced and are enjoying this aspect of you. If any one of these were not checked, then you are allowing everything else in your work and your life to be more important than taking care of you. The irony is that by taking care and nurturing you, you are in a better place and space to enjoy others, contribute and interact in more meaningful ways with others and in your work. So whatever you did not check, make it your priority to bring the individual, authentic you back into your life. INC. – The business or professional YOU If you checked 9, 10, 11, and 12 ….. you have embraced and are enjoying this aspect of you. If any one of these were not checked, then you are allowing yourself to be in a place or space that is not gratifying or fulﬁlling you in the work that you do. Take a look at what you did not check and consider why. Then make a list of things you can do, small things, which can shift you to more fulﬁlling and meaningful work. Which of the three aspects of you is most missing right now? Is it the Me? Is it the Myself? Is it the Inc.? Take a look at what you did not check off and make a list of action steps you can take to bring these aspects of you into being. Once you are embracing all the Me, Myself and Inc. aspects of you fully and completely, you will truly know satisfaction and fulﬁllment beyond what you could have ever imagined.
Bio: Sherré DeMao inspires millions through her monthly columns, weekly Insight eZine and national contributing writing. An expert strategist and marketer focused on entrepreneurs, her unique perspective and innovative approach has earned numerous awards regionally, nationally and internationally including being named among the Top 50 Enterprising Women of North America in 2007. Her books, Me, Myself & Inc. (www.memyselfandinc.com) and 50 Marketing Secrets (www.50marketingsecrets.com) have received national acclaim as Top Business Shelf picks and must reads.
www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 27
Look Who’s Knocking At The Door by Stefanie Hutcheson
pg 28 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | May 2012
Knock, knock “Who’s there?” I call out. Silence. I peep through the window, knowing full and well whose tiny ﬁsts are gently pounding on my door. Walker. He has a look of anticipation on his face. I quietly unlock the door, and open it just enough so that he can push it the rest of the way. His face lights up as he makes his entrance. He expects a happy greeting and I don’t disappoint him. “Hello! Granny is so glad to see you!” Depending on his mood and mischief level of the moment, I can either smooch on him or try to get a kiss from him as he squirms in Mama’s grasp. Sometimes he joyfully comes into my expectant arms and snuggles. I never know with this kid! Other times when he visits, I “ignore” his knock. He has this screechy way of saying “Whereyouat?” in one long, scratch word that greatly amuses me. Between this and “Ooh hoo?” I am all smiles when contact is made. Walker is too little to reach the door knob. He can’t get in by himself. Someone has to open the door. No matter his excitement level at wanting to visit with me, he cannot come in on his own. He has to be “invited.” Does this remind you of Anyone? Jesus perhaps? He’s waiting on the outside, greatly wanting to see you, to visit for a while. His eyes are bright with anticipation as He awaits you to peep out and see Who is there and hurriedly open the door to let Him in. Walker also loves to close the door. It gives him control over saying goodbye. His tiny lips are frequently puckered in sadness when someone has to leave. Often he is bawling as the door shuts and he puts the lock in place. Still too young to fully realize the concept of arrivals, departures, and time elements, he sometimes asks “Right back?’” in his shaky little voice. I—or whomever’s home he is at—will concur or try to explain that “Mama has to go to school” or “Dad has to go to work.” In a moment or two, he has moved on to his next adventure. Unless… Wait. Who’s that he sees as he watches out the window? His beloved is back! He rushes to the door, trying his best to get it open. But alas. He’s still too little. He didn’t miraculously grow and even though the knock hasn’t come yet, he’s ready, ready to get that door open and let his visitor in. Knock knock Oh, he knows who’s there. He’s been hoping for this return. With a little help, the door is ﬂung open and a joyful reunion occurs. Hugs and kisses are exchanged. Smiles are on all faces. The one he’d been waiting for is back. What could be better than this? Is The Holy Spirit nudging you, preparing you for this Visitor? He’s going to knock. Perhaps you were napping the ﬁrst time He came by. Maybe you weren’t dressed or you were in a sour mood and didn’t want company. Doesn’t matter. He is coming again. I hope you’ll answer the knock this time. He won’t come in though unless you invite Him. He can’t. That’s not His way. Unlike Walker, Jesus won’t yell “Whereyouat?”. You know He’s been looking for you. One day soon He will knock. And when that day comes, when the door is opened and you see your Beloved, pure joy will follow, just as it does for Walker each time he sees the one he’s been waiting for.
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pg 30 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | May 2012
It’s All About The
Bling by Susan Guest, ASID
Almost every woman loves jewelry. It can add class to an outﬁt and can bring out the personality of the owner. There are many different qualities of jewelry. Fine jewelry is made to last forever and is usually expensive. Fashion jewelry may or may not be pricey; but gives a more current look. Have you ever thought of accessories as jewelry for your home? Like the jewelry you wear, accessories can add dimension to your life. You can buy all qualities of bling for your homefrom discount store to luxurious, custom- ordered items. Jewelry can give others the impression of who you are and where you are in life. Accessories in your home can do the exact same thing. The furnishings in your home can be used as status symbols just as diamonds or cars. Whereas most women receive jewelry on special occasions, I get accessories. For our 10th wedding anniversary, my husband told me to look for a piece of jewelry. I came back from furniture market with a huge oil painting of four greyhounds. That painting has graced our dining room for years and reﬂects the personalities of our precious dogs and also of us as dog-lovers. Another year, I bought a painting for my husband from a local artist. It has been in several rooms in the house, but now lives in my ofﬁce where it is enjoyed daily. Another painting was purchased to celebrate completion of a large design project. Like jewelry, lamps can add sparkle to a dull palette. A boring dress will come to life with the right necklace. A dull sofa will come to life with some gorgeous lamps. Buy the best quality you can afford unless you can afford to decorate often. Good basic lamps compare to a wedding ring or strand of pearls-timeless and always beautiful! A rule of thumb has always been to put your nicest lamps in the areas where you entertain- such as your living room or foyer. I think you should put them in the areas that you will enjoy them the most-family room or bedroom. If you have an area of your home that is dark and dreary, consider adding an up -light or ﬂoor lamp for drama. Pillows are another way to add bling to a tired room. They can be changed with your mood, holiday, or time of year. You can transition from winter to spring by changing out the sofa pillows to brighter, fun colors. Pillows are a great way to stretch an
expensive fabric that you just have to use in the room somewhere! Even if you just buy a yard and use a plain inexpensive fabric on the back, you can still sneak that fabric into your décor. Pillows can have fun quotes or sayings that reﬂect who you are. You might use a “gone ﬁshing” pillow in a lake cabin and a “queen of shoes” pillow in a sitting area of a dressing room. Needlepoint pillows of your favorite ﬂower or dog breed also can add your unique ﬂavor to your room. In rooms that get more use, I usually either recommend less expensive ,store bought pillows or some made out of outdoor or performance fabrics. As with your wardrobe, accessories can take a functional area from drab to fabulous. For instance, you can make your bookcase come to life by accessorizing with things other than books. In between books, add vases and small statues. In front of books, family photographs tell the story of your clan. Plants add some greenery and life to the shelves. Up-lights or small lamps give light and drama. Try to have a shelf with nothing but a large decorative box to keep things from getting monotonous. If you are unable to purchase all those lovely accessories that you drool over in the magazines, don’t lose heart. Most of us cannot buy all the jewelry we wear at one time. Don’t worry if you don’t have the funds to accessorize your entire home at once. Buying one piece at a time can be fun-like having Christmas several times a year. One month, you might purchase a lamp for your living room. Several months later, you might add some splashy pillows. A nice piece of art for over the sofa might come the next year. Purchasing things in stages not only helps your pocket book, it also gives you time to enjoy the process and think carefully about the next step. If you are on a strict budget and don’t have much room for the extras, get creative! Reinvent what you have-get ideas from craft magazines or websites that feature projects to transform your existing items. Visit places like the Resource Warehouse that has craft days to help with your creativity. Sales and consignment shops are great places to ﬁnd items that you might normally not be able to afford. Consider swapping accessories with a friend. An item that you no longer want may be just the perfect treasure in your buddy’s home. Another way to feel like you have new bling is to rearrange items that you own. A lamp might have a whole new look in a different room. Carol Channing sings “Diamonds are a Girl’s Best Friend”. I think I’ll write a song titled “Dance with a Lamp” or “Cover me in Silk Pillows with Red Embroidery”. After all, it is all about the bling-whether it is on your arm or on your sofa!
Susan Guest, ASID is an award-winning interior designer in Hickory and owner of Guest Interiors, LLC. She is one of the designers featured in “Spectacular Homes of the Carolinas”, found in high-end bookstores around the country. For more information, visit www.guestinteriors.com.
www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 31
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Recipes for ife
by Emily Wickham
Food for the Body Chocolate Wacky Cake (Montezuma Amish Mennonite Cookbook) 3 c. ﬂour 2 c. sugar 3 Tbsp. cocoa 2 tsp. baking soda ½ tsp. salt ¾ c. cooking oil 2 Tbsp. apple cider vinegar 1 Tbsp. vanilla 2 c. cold water Put all ingredients in a bowl and use a mixer to beat on low/medium speed. Pour into a greased 9x13 dish and bake on 325 degrees for 25 – 30 minutes. Allow cake to cool completely, then frost with Chocolate buttercream frosting*. *Frosting: 1 lb. (4 c.) confectioner’s sugar, 2 Tbsp. cocoa, ½ c. softened butter, 1 tsp. vanilla extract, 3 Tbsp. milk. Beat all ingredients with mixer until creamy. If necessary, add a little more milk until frosting acquires spreading consistency.
A Prayer for God’s Blessing Loving Father in heaven, You are the Giver of life and Creator of all. Thank You for making me unique and special in Your sight. Please help me use the talents and traits You’ve blessed me with as sources of blessing for my children. In Jesus’ precious and holy name, Amen.
Food for the Soul Our family enjoys a simple tradition that surprisingly has become a highlight. Whenever a birthday rolls around, each family member chooses his or her birthday dinner menu. Whether it’s one of my sons, my daughter, or even my husband, the honoree deliberates very thoughtfully on this decision. They carefully select their favorites, often requesting chocolate cake for dessert. Knowing how much my children delight in this small tradition ﬁlls me with pleasure. I’ve made many mistakes as a mom through the years, and I’ve often felt like my mothering capabilities just don’t measure up. I’m not creative enough, not fun enough, not patient enough, etc. etc. But this birthday dinner tradition developed seemingly out of nowhere has been an absolute hit! I’m very grateful.
Psalm 139:13 tells us, “For Thou didst form my inward parts; Thou didst weave me in my mother’s womb. I will give thanks to Thee, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Wonderful are Thy works, And my soul knows it very well.” Every human being is special. God has created each one of us with particular talents and abilities. Furthermore, every mother is special. The Lord has intricately designed each one to love and care for her children in ways glorifying to Him. As I begin to realize God has “wonderfully made me wonderful”, I’m warmed by another realization: He doesn’t expect me to be like any other mom – no matter how wonderful she is. God wants me to be the mom He created me to be. God wants you to be the mom He created you to be. Our heavenly Father, our Creator desires that we appreciate the distinctive qualities He lovingly placed in us when He formed us in our mother’s womb. Instead of wishing we were more like this or that, let’s evaluate the exceptional characteristics with which God already has equipped us: • Are we full of life and outgoing? Let’s share this zest and sparkle by enjoying daily adventures with our children. • Are we quiet, thoughtful, and reserved? Let’s impart our God-given wisdom and prudent words with our children as they encounter life challenges. • Are we out-of-the-box thinkers who creatively handle difﬁcult situations? Let’s teach our children to utilize their ingenuity so they can become master problem solvers. • Are we diligent and attentive to detail? Let’s encourage our children to “dot their i’s and cross their t’s” so they can enjoy the beneﬁts of being responsible. Just as birthday dinners vary at my house, mothers vary in temperament, skills, and countless ways. Yet we all share one thing in common: we are “fearfully and wonderfully made.” My children think my chocolate cake tastes extraordinarily scrumptious, while I know it’s made from ordinary ingredients. Similarly, God has uniquely combined certain qualities within each of us in order to make us extraordinary moms. No matter how we feel about ourselves as moms, may we look to the Lord Jesus Christ and His love for children as our inspiration to improve. He loves us too, and He equips us to positively impact our children all through their lives. When we make mistakes, let’s apologize and ask for forgiveness. When we enjoy success, let’s give God the glory. God uses motherhood to bless and teach us. In turn, may we use motherhood to bless and teach our children His ways. We might then experience the same joy as the Proverbs 31 woman: “Her children rise up and bless her …” (verse 28). Until
next time, that’s a Recipe for Life …
Emily Wickham, published author, speaker, and founder of Proclaiming Him to Women Ministries, gently yet powerfully presents God’s Word. She encourages and equips women by exalting Christ through inspirational, practical Bible teaching. Her bi-weekly study takes place in Hickory, NC, and her blog devotionals can be read at www.proclaiminghimtowomen. com. Emily welcomes speaking opportunities at women’s events such as retreats, luncheons, and conferences. Please e-mail email@example.com. Emily resides in western NC with her husband and their four children.
www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg33
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Question: I have terrible dark circles under my eyes. Is there anything I can do that will make the circles go away or at the least, make them less noticeable?
Answer: Ah yes, it is that time of year when our eyes burn, itch, turn all shades of red and swell, and last but not least, DARK CIRCLES!!! The darkness is actually blood pooled underneath the eyes. Allergies are probably the culprit behind your dark circles, but there are other factors as well. Heredity is mostly the common reason, if one or both of your parents had dark under eye circles, then most likely you will be plagued with the same problem as well. Too little sleep and too much stress can also cause them. No matter what the cause, there are a few things you can do to help them. Of course, if allergies are the cause than you must take some type of allergy medicine to get started in the right direction. This is something you will need to discuss with your doctor. After that you can use green tea bags that have been steeped for approximately 5 minutes in tepid water. Apply a drop of extra virgin Olive Oil to each eye and gently pat with ring ﬁnger to distribute. Then lay back with head on a pillow and apply the tea bags. Leave on for about 10-15 minutes. The antioxidants in the tea bags will help with pufﬁness and the darkness. When applying make-up, skip the concealer and use a highlighter instead. The highlighter will “reﬂect” the light making it more difﬁcult to see the darkness. You can also try using a vitamin “K” creme. Vitamin K is known for reducing the signs of bruising and dark circles. However, you will have to use the vitamin K everyday for it to work. Once you have the dark circles it will take you longer to see the results. The best cure for dark circles is the use of an IPL Laser or Intense Pulse Light. The light will penetrate the skin and actually “repair” the capillaries underneath the eye, so that the blood pool will not be there. Therefore, no more DARK CIRCLES. The treatment must be performed by a licensed Esthetician, Nurse Practitioner, or in a Dermatologist or Cosmetic surgeons ofﬁce. The treatment is affordable, especially if you only get the under eye area done. This will keep you free of dark circles for several months, and sometimes years. The IPL laser can be used no matter what the cause for your under eye circles, wether it is allergies, stress, or heredity. The Laser works best on people with fair Living Community to medium skin tones. If your considering this for a more I suggest oticed apermanent changed in aﬁx. loved one’s you consult your doctor to ask for a recommendation a qualiﬁed practitioner to perform your re for themselves or do youon worry laser procedure. safety?
re there for you, you should be there
& BEAUTY www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 35
“Help! My Husband Is A
by Jennifer Brunham
There is a difference between being a hoarder and being a packrat. The term “hoarder” is used more frequently than ever before thanks to television showcasing the mental disorder. It is indeed a mental disorder, which almost paralyzes individuals into living in the past and never moving forward to live in the future. However, a “packrat” is much different. Someone who keeps the majority of items that come through their home is a packrat. They pack away and store for another day. They do not keep broken egg shells and used garbage bags. See the difference? I think there is a little packrat in all of us. Who hasn’t held on to a 1985 prom dress that reminds us of what fun we had in high school? We have a tendency to hold on to “stuff” for two reasons: it reminds us of a great memory, and we think it might come in handy one day in the future. The latter is something that I believe is passed down from generations before us, especially those that went through The Great Depression. We are hardwired into “recycling” everything either for our own personal future use or to be passed down to another family member. But remember: 1. Memories never live in “things” -- they live in our minds and our hearts 2. There is no guarantee that a niece will want your old 1950 Barbie set -- and it may not be safe for children to play with now under new regulations. Vintage isn’t always cool to the younger folks. Now -- what to do when you are battling a packrat in your own home and life. The ﬁrst thing to do is realize that someone’s stuff, however much they have, isn’t junk. Every item, or almost every item, represents an attachment to a person, memory, or plan for the future (see above). You must respect that. R.E.S.P.E.C.T. - sing it Aretha! Compromises are the key to any good relationship. Let there be certain rooms where your packrat has the freedom to display and store, and you have the freedom to close the door! If you start with a conversation explaining how the extra stuff stored and displayed all over the house is affecting you and your relationship, then you have a better chance of coming together with a compromise! Pointing ﬁngers, yelling, and calling him names like “hoarder” won’t get you far. Say something like, “I understand why these things are important to you, but it is hard for me to relax and enjoy time with you when our home feels so cluttered. Can we come up with a solution that doesn’t affect either one of us or our relationship negatively?” Be energetic about starting the project. Maybe help paint the room(s) where the extra stuff will be stored and displayed. Offer to go shopping for shelves and organizing supplies to help keep everything in the best order possible. Reaching out in a positive way will help ease your stresses about the clutter and the strain on the relationship!
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www.facebook.com/PureandSimpleOrg pg 36 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | May 2012
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S h o p 2 4 / 7 O n l i n e a t w w w. A l l G r a c i e . c o m pg 38 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | May 2012
“Keep going Taylor! You can do it!” rang the cheers during Girls on the Run practice at Scotts Elementary School in Statesville, NC. “Go Taylor, Go!” Taylor Ruppe is just one of hundreds of girls who participate each season in Girls on the Run in Statesville, and one of hundreds of thousands who participate across the country. Girls on the Run is a life-changing program that combines training for a 5k running event with self-esteem enhancing, uplifting workouts. Girls in third through eighth grade complete a 12-week curriculum that culminates with the 5k. Taylor was excited to try GOTR. She has always been willing to try new things. “It was good for me and my body. I want to be healthy and this will help me,” says Taylor. Her mom, Rhonda Ruppe mentions, “She has a new focus on trying to exercise and eat healthy. It is nice to see her take an interest in her physical health at such an early age.” This is exceptional because Taylor is an exceptional girl. Diagnosed with Cerebral Palsy at nine months old, Taylor is able to walk, and yes, even run. “Participating in GOTR has increased her conﬁdence. She used to say ‘I can’t do that’ but she never says that anymore. We are so proud of her and know she can do anything she wants in life!” Rhonda exclaims. “The girls on our team were all great friends. They were supportive and cheered for each other during practice. They would run with me and cheer for me.” Taylor tells us. Her experience with Girls on the Run has been life changing. She enjoyed being with the other girls and participating in an activity. Her conﬁdence has increased and she is very proud of her biggest accomplishment, ﬁnishing the 5k. “I worked hard and I did it!” exclaims Taylor. “I love my medal. I love that I won it.” This is the ﬁrst athletic award Taylor has ever received and she earned it right alongside her mom who also completed her ﬁrst 5k that day. “She was also proud of me for ﬁnishing my ﬁrst 5k. I didn’t receive a medal but I told Taylor my medal was being with her,” Taylor’s mom recalls. In 2011 more than 180,000 girls across the country accomplished their goal of running a 5k. This spring you can join girls in your area to cheer them on. For more information or to ﬁnd a 5k in your area visit www. girlsontherun.org.
Taylor Ruppe pictured on the right holding her medal.
www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 39
The Wedding Season by Mackey Carpenter Did you know there are really ﬁve seasons in a year? There is Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter and The Wedding Season. Well maybe it’s not really a season. But it should be. Most weddings go through hot spells, cold spells, storms and occasionally a little turmoil. And like a season, it all doesn’t happen in just one day. A wedding comes about as a culmination of many things that have taken place over several weeks, months or even years. One thing about The Wedding Season is that it can come about when you want it to. You can change the date, change the time or even change the location as many times as you need to. And it has a special holiday of it’s own. And it’s a monumental one--The Wedding Day. The Wedding Season isn’t restricted to certain styles as other seasons are. In this case style means things we associate with that season. When we think of Winter, we often think of cold weather and snow. Spring--new birth, the budding of trees and the sweet smell of rain. Summer-green lawns, gardens and ﬂowers. Fall--cooler nights and the magniﬁcent colors of leaves. The style of a wedding can take on many forms. It can be small and intimate, with just a few people. The decorations are minimal, usually informal and the ceremony usually lasts just a few minutes. A large wedding can be totally over the top, with hundreds of people, and most deﬁnitely has a formal air to it. Most ceremonies of this style can take an hour or more. Most weddings fall into the middle category. Weddings of this style can have up to 200 people. There is no limit to the style and are usually very eclectic. Ceremonies can be held in the middle of a ﬁeld under a tree, on the edge of a vineyard or the front porch of a historic home. In the past, The Wedding Season was very “Emily Post” with pages of do’s and don’t. We were told what to wear pg 40 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | May 2012
and how to wear it. The proper dress, ﬂowers and even food were an integral part of this past era. No one would dare wear a pink wedding gown or get married at the stroke on midnight on New Year’s Eve. Even the style of the pictures of the wedding have changed. It used to be that the engagement pictures were always taken in a studio. Now they can be taken anywherefrom the top of Grandfather Mountain sitting on a rock to a simple backyard swing. Savor those special moments that can only happen during your Wedding Season. And unlike the other four seasons, this one is just for you. Mention This Ad When You Book & Receive A Free Gift!
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www.thepeacockinn-newton.com www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 41
Our Monthly Feature
Photos from our May 2012 Contest.
Photo Submitted By: Caught In The Act Photography
Local Photos of Everyday people, places, and events as seen through the eyes of the area's professional and amateur photographers!
s h u t t e r b u g g e r z . c o m 42
Visit the website to view all the photos and to enter your photo into next monthâ€™s contest.
Photo Submitted By: Don Anthony
Photo Submitted By: Revival Photography
Photo Submitted By: Gragg Photography
Photo Submitted By: Elements Photography www.shutterbuggerz.com
Photo Submitted By: Kathryn Cooke
Photo Submitted By: Heidi Casey Photography Photo Submitted By: Erin Annas
Photo Submitted By: Kimberly Michael Photography 2010_Sophie_Ad_11-3-10.pdf
Photo Submitted By: Crystal Ptacek
Visit the website to view all the photos and to enter your photo into next monthâ€™s contest.
Photo Submitted By: Lasting Generations Photography
Photo Submitted By: Heather Crawley
Photo Submitted By: Kari Grace
Photo Submitted By: Caught In The Act Photography www.shutterbuggerz.com
Photo Submitted By: KRJ Photography
Photo Submitted By: Kathryn Cooke
Photo Submitted By: Michelle Hrin Photography
Be Sure To Visit
To Submit, Vote, & View PHotos
Photo Submitted By: Swoone Photography
Visit the website to view all the photos and to enter your photo into next monthâ€™s contest.
Don’t miss the hottest tour in town! Get Your FREE Guide at the Home Builders Association office or visit www.hickoryHBAparade.com for more locations.
Saturdays, May 5 & May 12 – 11 AM to 6 PM Sundays, May 6 & May 13 – 1 PM to 6 PM
Hickory–Catawba Valley HBA • 3145 Tate Boulevard SE, Hickory, NC 28602 • (828) 322-6842
Inspiration, Education, & Motivation for women of all ages.