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Issue #4 Vol #5 April 09



april fools

heavy metal! powder skates!

n t o u i revol

Snowskate Shop Wenatchee, Washington



“People who know what they are doing are dangerous” William Murderface. “Starfish has swiss support” Michael steinhasen on starfish’s international status. “that was so fun, I can’t even believe how fun that was” jackson on his florida powder demo. “Dude are you serious?” Sean Keannelly on being the new primordia. “I’m just in it for fun, like a little kid.” Craig fauria on Pioneers business plan.

“Write "Jordan is a fag" or whatever your angry American self feels like writing.” Jordan on starfish’s new ability to blog. “Thanks for putting my boobs in the Magazine” Amy James on the buyers guide. “I think you're paradigm is robust” Kurt Zapata on the interview issue.

Ted Amell photo by Nicole Gerdes

“I mean I have done some fairly “metal” things in my life,”

Photos and Ranting by

big John

Photos courtesy of the Florida Powder Lab

THE WHIP, Self titled 7”. Wantage USA records.

When I first moved from Chicago to Montana the last thing I expected was to see good music. What I found was an underground scene full of kick ass local

bands brought to life by playing support for the touring bands that made Missoula their one stop between Minneapolis and Seattle. My introduction to this scene was watching my friend’s band open up for Karp at a house party. That night changed my life. Not only did Karp burn

the place down, but this was the first time ever that I witnessed a drummer just absolutely kicking the living shit out of his drum set! He straight up murdered his kit and at the end of the show I could not believe it was still in one piece. I get chills just thinking about that Karp sound shaking my bones as I stood right next to the bass amp. So a bunch of

years go by, Karp breaks up, and my buddy Chad ends up working at a bar in Seattle with the dude who played drums for Karp, Scotty. I meet the dude and what do you know, he’s a super nice guy who likes his whiskey as

much as I do. After a couple belts of whiskey I fan out on him about how Karp was the best and how the Melvins weren’t shit and blah blah blah. He set me straight about the Melvins right quick and then proceeded to tell me how he was working on a side project with Buzzo or Dale or whatever and it was gonna be called “The Whip”. I couldn’t wait to hear that shit. Unfortunately, before I did hear this epic recording, Scotty died in a freak boating accident leaving the world stripped of one of the best heavy drummers ever. Go do yourself a favor and pick up this 7”, if you like your rock heavy you won’t be let down. If you don’t have a turntable you’re blowing it. What in the hell qualifies me to write about heavy metal? I have no idea. I mean I have done some fairly “metal” things in my life, but I also do some really wuss shit on a regular basis. Using the word metal as an adjective lets see

where I rate in the world of heshdom. I love good heavy metal, but I have no tolerance for b-grade new metal bands and I have recently adopted an “if it ain’t Slayer it sucks” policy regarding almost any new metal band. Liking Slayer is metal, turning a deaf ear to the underground because I don’t have the time for new bands, not metal. But until a band one ups “Reign In Blood” I will defend my belief that Slayer is really the only metal you need. I mean, sure, the first two albums I ever bought were Maiden’s “The Number of the Beast” and AC/DC’s “Dirty Deeds”. Pretty f’n metal you might say. Well the first cassette I ever bought was Maiden’s “Powerslave” and when the Casio hand help tape deck ate my tape, I cried. My sister bitch slapped me and called me a wuss after she fixed the tape and I laid crying on the floor. Crying is not metal, not at all. The second concert I ever went to was Metallica in 1988. Hell yeah. My third concert

“My sister bitch slapped me and called me a wuss”

Adam baker

jake ted

“Damn that was some skate hate.”

was Phil Collins. Hell no. Because of my older neighbor Todd Bruin I was introduced to some metal at an early age. Sweet. Because I’m an idiot I just figured out about a week ago how much ass Black Sabbath’s “Sabotage” kicks. Weak. Not only have I never had glorious long flowing locks of hesher hair, but now I’m currently going bald. Double not metal. You know what is as metal as hell itself? Snowskating. Watch Tyson bomb towards a kicker and

you’ll see it. You can almost hear the blistering guitar licks blasting through his mind. Watching him shredskate is like watching a Kerry King solo. The masses seem to hate snowskating and that is a sure fire way to know if something is metal or not. The more they hate, the more metal it is. Did you see that comment forum on after they posted Sean’s video? Damn that was some skate hate. This is why snowboarding is so Evo, I mean emo. This can be yet another strike in my non-metal column. Yup, I was around for the early days of snowskating, but the amount of days I snowboard compared to days I snowskate is embarrassing. While I’m rambling here you know what else is metal? Moguls! Snowskating moguls is wicked metal. I have dreams of a snowskate mogul comp like the skier mogul comps seen on tv. Head to head speed bump slash

runs with giant kickers to flat, right back into wicked moguls would be so fun to watch. The crash factor would be through the roof. Anyway lets get back to some music for fucks sake. B.T.P.N.L.S.L Debut

7” Live. Outpunk Records. Who the hell is B.T.P.N.L.S.L.? Behead The Prophet No Lord Shall Live! These guys weigh in on the more hardcore/punk then metal side of things, but the name Behead The Prophet

No Lord Shall Live is as metal as it gets. These guys got speed to burn and total chaos is the norm for every song. A couple things that make these dudes register in the metal column besides their name are the fact that they have

“Watching him shredskate is like watching a Kerry King solo.”

Big JOhn

a violinist in the band whose gotta be at least 50 years old and lays down the gnarliest violin cuts ever. “Gnarly Violin cuts”, holy shit that sounds stupid. Check the live show to see why the violinist, Michael Griffen is credited with “Violin and eerie presence” on the back of the album. The dude’s out there. Because this record is on Outpunk I’m guessing that at least one of the bands members are gay, and if any of you homophobes out there think being gay is not metal I got two words for you, Rob fucking Halford. Also, if you read my rant above you will remember that being hated on is indeed a quality found in most things metal, and there isn’t a group of people more hated on then gays. A.C. “Everyone should be killed”. Fuck it, I’m just gonna let wikipedia take this one. Pretty much sum’s it up. Palgerisnm, damn right that’s heavy metal. They have been categorized as grindcore, noisecore, and hardcore. The band is often referred to by their initials A.C. (often written


as AxCx) due to the offensive nature of their name and censorship limits on some radio and publications, and many of their album covers simply display the initials A.C. However, the band has managed to subvert even this abbreviation by drawing these letters in a manner resembling an anus and a vulva. Their early material contained no pre-written lyrics or music. Rather, the band developed a style of creating a style which consisted of extremely loud, fast, and aggressive noise that was created entirely on the spot and was (by design) completely devoid of any actual music. Over the years, the band eventually shifted their style and slowly began to incorporate more riffs and pre-written lyrics into their songs. It wasn’t until then that the band earned the reputation (at least via their recordings) for basically being anti-everything. Currently, they are working on a new album, which is tentatively entitled “Wearing Out Our Welcome”. Genius. Keep your eye on Starfish for more musical enlightenment.

70% off all boards in stock!

Primordia Sean Kenneally Name: Sean Kenneally Age: 15 Home: Ocean Bluff, MA.

“i don’t know man.”

Flat or Bi-deck? Both.

right now? I don’t know man. i’ll have to say derek wholley.

When did you start snowskating? When I was about 11 years old. Influences? Premier team, snowskate videos. When did you first see Starfish Magazine? When my friend showed me the web site a while ago. Early of Late grabber? Early. Who is on the best snowskater in the world

How many Red Bulls a day? ha ha, depends on the day, or session. Who is you dream sponsor? Just being sponsored would be a dream, so anyone. Who do you need to thank? Definitely my mom and my dad. Other than them derek, ian, mike, kyle, ned, and my neighbors for putting up with our 1 a.m. sessions out back ha ha, and of course starfish.






Frontside 180


5 4 Photos by big john





Team rider sid leonard

m u i d Po after three years the long awaited noboard magazine has released their second issue. It’s more of a catalog than a magazine. a catalog about cholo burns by cholo burns. epic terrain makes for some great photos if you see a copy pick it up. Inspite of Paul Elkins attempt at rigging this years Xgaymes the event was once again dominated by the flatdeckers Phil Smage and alan Gerlach.

Starfish’s youngest hero Adrian rassmuson who was featured in our first ever primordia section and again signing boobs in the travel issue recently got sponsored by pioneer snowskates. Pioneer is moving away from having a team of deadbeats and is forming a team of rad groms. Pure genius. Look forward to more photos of adrain soon. Sick dog leashes has finally been run out of business by the

In international news, Mike steinhausen has been seen doing kickflips while riding a t-bar in Switzerland.

Florida powder company. The new florida leashes just work way better. while recovering from knee surgery snowskate film pioneer seth hall has been producing

Local skaters were outraged after the uptight ski resort Mount Hood Meadows reversed their policy and no longer allows it’s patrons to ride binding free.

snowskate tv. the television program airs on channel x in the tahoe area three times a week and highlights a new tahoe ski resort experiance each week. Skaters outside the tahoe region can watch the shows at

A new sect of skaters calling themselves the Powderday Saints have been seen shredding the mountains around Logan Utah. The powder saints boards are made by a company called Grassroots and look a lot like wake skates. Their new video on proves they work.

located in the heart of snow surfing country, Muskegon, michigan.

This might not be new news but it is new to us. Bob novak, Sherwin Poppins original ripper who begain snurfing in 1970 has resurected the snurfer and is selling them under the name Novak snurfbords. with thirty years of experience these promise to be the best snurfers yet. There factory is

Despite the efforts made by goblin, jake, clarke #3 in the world and danny Sheehan south lake tahoe’s newest snowskate super star 13 year old jomey smith Won this years Ralston cup slope style event and $500. Look forward to a full jomey interview in next years interview issue.

Starfish staff photographer Dane orvold put down his lens long enough to win the first ever silver fir massacre. at the ralston cup you can win money at the silver fir massacre the winner just gets beer poured on him. what is it about good skating that makes you wanna cover your friends in beer?

After two weeks of legal battles the olympic committee agreed to put the final nail in the coffin of sick dog leashes. Monents befor this years powder downhill ivent competitors laughed as clarke hurlbut #3 in the world and sick dogs owner droped his board and slid all of the way to the bottom of the hill. Fortunatly nobody was hurt but the olympic commitee was outraged at sick dogs lack of concern for safty. Sick Dog leashes have now been banned from international competition. At this time it is unclear whether Clarke hurlbuts global ranking will be effected.

A full story is in the works for next years travel issue but here are the placings from this years minus 7 melee at donner. SKATERcross youth womens

1st place joshua smith 1st place Tara atkins 2nd place leahanna mckinnon 3rd place michelle minahan men 1st place danny sheehan 2nd place sean davis 3rd place travis atkins slope style youth



Photo by Jeff mihailoff This years Olympic event proved to be one of the funnest events in snowskate history. the weather cooperated perfectly and the scene was set for the worlds first powder race. 20 riders lined up along a ridge line looking down at 7 inches of new snow under bluebird skies with the ocean looming in

1st place joshua smith 2nd place zack mccloskey 3rd place adrian spiers 1st place michelle minahan 2nd place tara atkins 3rd place leahanna mckinnon 1st place pat “goblin� quinn 2nd place sean davis 3rd place danny sheehan

the background. The powder race itself was a chinese downhill descending about 400 vertical feet with every rider getting fresh tracks. Canada’s jordan armstrong brought home the gold with Jake and Ted following closely behind him. This makes jordan the first Canadian ever to win gold at the Olympics.



Resort Bear Mountain Boreal Mountain Dodge Ridge June Mountain Kirkwood Mammoth Mt. High Northstar at Tahoe Sierra at Tahoe Snow Summit Breckenridge Buttermilk Copper Mountain Crested Butte Keystone Beaver Creek Vail Telluride Schweitzer Silver Mtn Sun Valley Chestnut Mountain


Raging Buffalo Paoli Peaks Perfect North Sunday River Bittersweet Caberfae Holiday Hills Marquette Mountain Appalachian Ski Mtn. Wolf Laurel Loon Mountain Waterville Valley Angel Fire Hoodoo Timberline OR Ski Liberty Ski Round Top Whitetail Ober Gatlingburg Brighton Snowbird Smuggler's Notch Stowe Stratton Sugarbush Hurricane Ridge WA Mt Baker WY Mt Spokane Summit at Snoqualmie


Steven's Pass Snow King

Province Resort AB Castle Mountain AB Canada Olympic Park AB Hidden Valley AB Lake Louise AB Marmot Basin AB Nakiska AB Rabbit Hill AB Snow Valley AB Sunshine AB Tawatinaw BC Fernie BC Mt. Seymour BC Red Mtn BC Whistler BC BC Whitewater NS Martock NS Wentworth QC Mont-Comi Park QC Tremblant Tyso n by Big John

Little Alex

Bozeman Mont


danny sheehan

michael steinhausen

Wolle nyvelt photo by scott sullivan

jomi smith photo by kurt zapata

photo by Robert Capa

how to build a powder skate Picture #1What you’ll need to make a powderskate from scratch. 1-old snowboard 1-old skatedeck 1-roll of duct tape 2-blocks of wood, 1 ½”x 2”x 5” 1-3/4”x2”x64” strip of plywood 1-3/4”x7”x64”strip of plywood handful of 1 ½” deck screws old yoga matt or scrap piece of cork from a bulletin board

Picture #2Screw the thin 2” strip of plywood to the top of the 7” strip of plywood with the 1 ½” screws. Then run your skilsaw down the jig so that the blade cuts the 7” strip flush with the blade of the skilsaw.

Picture #3Mark the tail of the board at 3 ¼” and the nose at 4 ¼” with a sharpie and screw the jig to the snowboard at the marks.

by Mark Edmundson

Picture #4 Set the blade so that it is about 1” below the guide. Make sure that the blade won’t run into the metal edge at the tip and tail or you’ll ruin it. Make the cut in a well ventilated space. Unscrew the jig and cut the other side using the same 3 ¼ tail and 4 ¼ nose measurement.

Picture #5You’ll have to finish the cuts at the nose and tail with a jig saw or handsaw. To cut the metal edge use a file or grinder or bolt cutters.

Picture #8 and #9Measure up from the tail about 1213” and locate the rear block with some duct tape. Space the front block so that it is around 18” from the back block. Set the skatedeck on top of the blocks to make sure they are positioned close enough to hit the flatspots on the deck.

Picture #6Seal the newly exposed wood edges thoroughly with a can of spray paint.

Picture #10Using the 1 ½” screws attach the sub to the blocks with at least four screws in each. Picture #7Tape the nose top and bottom with duct tape. Start at the bend and work your way to the nose so that snow won’t be forced under the tape. Tape juts the top side of the tail not the base.

Picture#12If you don’t have some snowskate foam handy buy a can of 3m 90 spray adhesive and glue an old yoga matt or scrap of cork to it. Spray both surfaces thoroughly wait until the glues feels just a bit tacky then press the grip to the deck.

Picture # 15If you want to make the nose and tail last a lot longer then trim off a chunk of the nose and tail from the scrap center strip and t-nut it to the sub.

Picture #13Cut the grip using a brand new Stanley razor blade pulled from the bottom at a 45 degree angle. Don’t saw up and down unless you want the edge to be ragged.

Mark Edmundson Picture #11Flip the set up over and attach the skatedeck with the 1 ½” screws to the blocks.

Picture #14Add some spikes for traction and your ready to go. Always carry some extra duct tape for on mountain repairs.


PLUTO SPORTS PLUTO SPORTS WEST 1723-C Cumberland Ave 245 N. Seven Oaks Dr. Knoxville, TN, 37916 Knoxville, TN. 37922 865 523-0045 865-693-8990


Photo by phil smage

Alan Gerlach

Photo by Jack Harris

Byorn Ryan Gorman

Rabbit Season "he should be treated as dangerous."



ell it happened again, this time at Shut Up and Snowskate. Once again this bunny was seen poaching and littering. Once again he was

beaten up by snowskaters. This time the bunny was tag teamed by Jake (tackling the bunny) and Goblin (kneeling behind the bunny). Photographer Jimmy Clarke (behind Jake) wasted no time jumping in and within minutes the bunny was beaten to submission. As the bunny remained unconscious the riders moved over to the race. Somehow during the race the bunny managed

than for most. So it was decided. John made his list of invitee’s which totaled 15 kindergartners and on up. My partner Mic, threw an 8 foot box together and dragged it over. I’ll have to say that prep for this birthday was a breeze. The day of John’s birthday was sunny and unseasonably warm; perfect. The kids arrived and immediately the box was the center of attention. Now, most of the kids had never even seen No Country for Old Men a snow-skate let alone stood on one but that didn’t seem to slow them “A Snow-skate Party!” was John’s down. For 4 hours those kids rode and answer to what he wanted to do for his 7th slammed and rode and rode. Most made birthday (Man do I love that kid). Having your own back yard snow-skate their trick, some didn’t. When it got dark the kids had park makes that kind of request a little easier

to come to and escape! At this time his where abouts are unknown. The bunny has been seen littering and poaching ski resorts and parties all over the world. If you encounter this bunny he should be treated as dangerous. The Starfish recommended procedure for dealing with dangerous bunnies is to beat them into submission. Please be careful and remember, when dealing with littering, poaching bunnies it is better to strike first. Better safe than sorry.

to get out of the pool and it was adult swim. The Argentinean Snowboard Instructors from DSR made it down off the hill and the usual suspects were assembled. Augustina took the dare from her friends and hit the box, wearing a kid’s helmet, while holding a beer. We rode until it was time to quit. When asked how his birthday went, John had this to say; “That was the coolest birthday ever!” Did I say that I love that kid. BY KURT ZAPATA



Northern Boarder ANCHORAGE






Shasta Base Camp


Mt Shasta






All Boards Boulder


303 Boards Denver


Mountain Wave Breckenridge BC Littleton

WORLD BOARDS BOZEMAN Big Sky Boardsports Helena

SOL Skates Longmont


Eternal Sports : Sparks

B.C. Surf & Sport Westminster


Board Cartel Wheatridge





ECO-LOUNGE BOISE Habitat Victor Barries Pocatello

ILLINOIS SHRED SHOP SKOKIE FA Skates, Arlington Heights RQ Boardshop Naperville




Chapter 11 Spring Lake






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NOLLIES, COVINGTON, NOLLIES .COM (253)-630-4440 REVOLUTION, WENATCHEE. REVOLUTIONSNOWANDSKATE. COM, (509) 665-6662 WYOMING Boardroom of Jackson Hole Jackson Hole Hole In The Wall Jackson Hole




Side Effect BEND EXIT real world Salem BOARD TACTICS EUGENE

“Next time you see a raccoon on the side of the road cut off his junk, take it home and clean it with bleach.”


he first thing to do when making your own moonshine or spirits is to convince yourself that it is not really that big of deal and the realistic chances of you going to jail are pretty slim. This can easily be accomplished in several ways: one by asking your friends if home distillation is illegal and having them tell you something like “It has been decriminalized” Wether or not this is true it will make you feel better. The fact that if properly motivated you could obtain a federal moonshiner permit usually helps too. It is also important to keep in mind is that the only thing that is really illegal is selling your spirits. If all that doesn’t work convince yourself that the ATF has a lot more important things to do than kick in your front door looking for a few jars of shine that your not even selling. Obviously there are more significant risks for a moonshiner than the ATF. Blindness is the first risk people usu-

ally bring up. As an educated shiner you can inform these none believers that the kind of alcohol that causes blindness cannot be derived from corn. Cases of blindness have been attributed to the fact that a lot of stupid people are involved in the moonshine trade. These stupid people do things like use an old radiator as worm or cut the shine with isopropanol or rubbing alcohol. Once again, don’t buy or sell shine and you will be fine. The more realistic threats to shiners are nosy neighbors and explosions. Nosy neighbors may see your still and think you are making meth. It is best to get these neighbors “on the taste” and reduce the chance of hassle. Explosions are a realistic fear. The fact that alcohol gas is


SIVE and you have a whole still full of it sitting on top of a propane burner is cause for some concern. The best advice is definitely never have your still inside and pay attention to what is going on. Turn off heat and fix gas leaks right away when they occur and they will occur. All alcoholic beverages are made by fermenting a sugar solution with

yeast, a process called mashing that converts the sugar to ethanol and carbon dioxide. The carbon dioxide is given off as bubbles the ethanol remains in the mash and is distilled out later. For the sake of making moonshine the mash recipe is so easy that many moonshiners who can’t even read can follow it. The recipe for moonshine mash is: 1 gallon water 1/4 lb. corn meal 1 lb. Sugar .06 oz. Yeast

These measurements don’t have to be exact. Especially the yeast. The more yeast the faster the reaction and at higher elevations more yeast is essential. The only real important thing is that you use CORN SUGAR NOT CORN STARCH. Corn starch is converted to corn sugar at the time of germination. So, you can either get a bunch of corn and germinate it in a burlap sack or you can go to the store and buy corn meal.

“The more realistic threats to shiners are nosy neighbors and explosions.” I would recommend making at least 50 gallons at a time. Once the ingredients are mixed up put them in a warm place and stir it once a week. In about three or four weeks the mashing will stop or at least slow way down. Carbon dioxide bubbles will cease to form and the mash will stop tasting sweet like 50lbs of sugar. Finished mash will smell and taste

bitter like a sour mash should. When the mash is done you are ready to distill. Distillation is simply the heating of a liquid to the boiling point followed by condensing the vapors on a cold surface back into liquid. This same process can be seen in nature where water evaporates from lakes and oceans leaving salts and impurities behind. Clouds form condense and relatively pure water rains back down on the earth. Stills can be purchased online or built pretty eas-

ily. It is important to use copper. If you are going to build your own the best directions are on

MOONSHINE VOCABULARY Backers- cloudy and weak shine produced at the end of a run. This shine is put “back” into the still with the next run producing a stronger shine.

In Moonshine mash the ethanol is far more volatile than the water, left over sugar or corn. This means that when you get the still going the first thing is gonna come out is high proof alcohol. The alcohol content of the shine will slowly drop off depending on the size of your still. As the potency declines the shine is gathered in a separate vessel and used as backer. Backers are low strength, usually cloudy shine that are put back in the still with the next batch. Backers are the secret to making high proof alcohol. Traditionally X’s were put on the jars to represent how many times a particular spirit has been run through the still. Two x’s and you don’t need music to dance. Three X’s and your gonna have three fights before the jar is done.

XXX- The more times shine is run through the still the stronger it gets. Historically X’s on the jars or jugs have informed drinkers how many times a spirit has been run through a still and therefore how strong it is.

The only real difference between whiskey and moonshine is that whiskey is put into a barrel and aged. Also with the proper use of backers moonshine can easily be 130 proof. Therefore when you fire up the still you better crank some Scott H. Biram, call some friends and be ready to party.

Moonshine-fresh corn liquor.

Coon Pecker- The bone from a Raccoons penis. Commonly used to prevent spillage between the Worm and the Jar. Coon peckers are readily available in the form of road kill. Next time you see a raccoon on the side of the road cut off his junk, take it home and clean it with bleach. Worm- The spiraled piece of copper tubing where condensation occurs. On The Taste- Used to describe people who drink your shine. Neighbors “on the taste” generally won’t report you to the authorities. Mash- Mashing is the process of turning sugar into alcohol. Mash is the mixture of sugar corn and yeast that ferments and is put into the still.

Whiskey- moonshine that has been put into a barrel and aged. The coloring comes from the aging process and the barrel. Spirits- A general term for distilled alcohol. Unfamiliar with yeast the earliest shiners left their mash uncovered and prayed to the “spirits” it would

This story was written in memory of World renown moonshiner Popcorn Sutton who died on march 16th 2009. R.I.P. Popcorn your spirit will live on in our spirits.

***story and photos mailed in by some guy we never even met

Clarke Hurlbut Photo By PLWP

Covington, Washington 253-630-4440 NOLLIES.COM

Vol 5 Issue 4  

Snowskate Magazine