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director’s chair

What becomes a legend most? For some, it’s relatively easy to take the ability to be out and proud for granted. The kids of the last decade have been raised in a far more accepting culture than ever before. That, my darlings, is a very good thing. However, there is a big reason why society has become more positive about things like being gay or gay marriage for that matter. That reason is all the people who stood up, took whatever flack they had to and proudly announced their part in our community. Some of us came out. Some came out as the parents, siblings or children thereof. Some simply came out as supporters. If a list existed, it would be of astounding length. But the interesting part is that it all started with one person. I don’t know who that person was and I don’t really think anyone else does either. It’s really more about that what than it is the who. The what is that realization that one person did and still can make a difference. I recently heard Jennie McNulty say, “If you’ll lose your job, then don’t. If you’ll be physically harmed, then don’t. But if you can, be out. Because it does make a difference.” It’s not always going to be easy. The road to true freedom never is. Each of us who have come out have suffered some kind of consequence or discrimination—some of us far more than others. Yet with each one person, whether it’s Ellen DeGeneres or the cashier at the grocery store, that road becomes a little less rocky. And that, my darlings, is also a very good thing. October brings us both National Coming Out Day and LGBT History Month. It’s the perfect time to take a step back and reflect upon where we would be if it weren’t for each and every person on that list of astounding length and their belief that one person could make a difference. For me, what becomes a legend most is their ability to stand up and be proud of who they are and that they believe in equal rights for all. Whether you shout it from the rooftops, announce it on a primetime sitcom or just tell your neighbors, you do have the ability to make a difference. So get out there and be a legend! See you next month.

Tina Sordellini Managing Executive Editor

MANAGING EXECUTIVE EDITOR Tina Sordellini PUBLICITY SHE ESPAÑOL EXECUTIVE EDITOR Maria Espinal ASSOCIATE EDITORS Marissa Cohen • Shawn Nicholson Denise Warner • Donna Woessner CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Marissa Cohen • Verónica Espinal The Village Sage • Nadine Smith Tina Sordellini • Denise Warner CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS Verónica Espinal • Yadira Claralt Laura Volk • Angie Sowers Juan Saco Mironoff • Boi-Photography SALES ASSOCIATES Maria Espinal • Diana Price Laura Volk • Donna Woessner ads@shemag.com DISTRIBUTION JR Davis • Randy Justice SUBSCRIPTIONS www.shemag.com EDITORIAL OFFICE 6511 Nova Drive, #173 • Davie, FL 33317 954.354.9751 office info@shemag.com • www.shemag.com

SHE: WOMEN OWNED, WOMEN OPERATED, WOMEN EMPOWERED! The ideas and opinions expressed in She Magazine do not necessarily reflect opinions of Shemag, L.L.C., She Magazine, or of editors or staff. Publication of the name or photograph of any person or organization should not be construed as any indication of the sexual orientation of that person or organization. All advertising subject to approval by She Magazine. She Magazine/Shemag, L.L.C. is not responsible for unauthorized use or copyright infringement as present in camera ready, client provided ads, nor is it liable for any loss or suit arising from submitted advertisement, copy, photography, or artwork. Reproduction of She Magazine, in whole or in part, is strictly prohibited without the express written consent of Shemag, L.L.C.

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october 2013 / VOLUME 15 / ISSUE 9

IN THIS ISSUE

28

20 features

she espaÑol

16 PALM BEACH PLEASURES

30 NOTICIAS

The Palm Beach area offers a huge variety of activities, besides the miles of gorgeous...

Entérate lo que sucede en nuestros países.

18 LGBT HISTORY MONTH

A look at the women who make history.

20 MARY LAMBERT

“It took a while to understand that I could have my own identity, embrace my body image...”

26 OLIVIA’S CARIBBEAN CRUISE

Join in the fun. It all starts in Fort Lauderdale, FL with a great cast.

31 YO SOY MUJER ¡Cuidate desde Hoy!

photos 04 SHE SCENE 12 BEACH BLANKET BABE/BUTCH 23 WOMENFEST KEY WEST 32 SHEDONISM VEGAS

28 JUST 4 FUN 29 CHECK YOUR BOOBIES

follow she

October 18th is National Mammography Day. Take the time to take care of yourself!

FACEBOOK.com/shemagazineFL search: She Mag / Like Us: She Magazine

departments

06 DIRECTOR’S CHAIR 10 MULTIMEDIA 14 IN THE NEWS 15 CALENDAR OF EVENTS 24 SHE GIRL Meet Michelle Lee from St. Petersburg, FL.

34 ON THE SHELVES 34 ARCHIVES 38 SCOPES

18

TWITTER.com/shemagazine MYSPACE.com/she_magazine LINKEDIN.com/she_magazine INSTAGRAM.com/shemagazine

apps

M.ISSUU.com on your Android Search: shemagazine / Free application ISSUU.com/shemagazine iPad,iPhone & iPod compatible

26

>> READ OUR FREE DIGITAL EDITION AT WWW.SHEMAG.COM

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MULTIMEDIA

with Marissa Cohen

Katy Perry’s Prism hits stores on October 18, but those who love the colorful “Teenage Dream” singer may want to wait until the deluxe version comes out on October 22 with three bonus tracks. Prism is the third album from Katy Perry and includes “Roar” which topped the US Billboard Hot 100 chart and features rapper Juicy J on two new tracks: “Dark Horse” and “Walking on Air.”

Fall down the rabbit hole with the fantastic Once Upon a Time in Wonderland, new from the creators of Once Upon a Time. In the beginning of this reimagining of Alice in Wonderland, young Alice returns to Victorian England, trying to forget her time spent in a strange new land, and the memories of the genie she lost…or did she? Stars include Sophie Lowe and Emma Rigby. Premieres on ABC on October 10 at 8 pm.

In House of Versace, super-sexy Gina Gershon (Bound, Showgirls) plays Donatella Versace who takes over her slain brother Gianni’s fashion empire in the wake of his 1997 murder. Battling angry critics and crippling addiction, Donatella almost bankrupts her late brother’s company. She goes into rehab with the help of her aunt (Raquel Welch) and emerges to triumph. Premieres October 5 at 8 pm on Lifetime.

DJ/Producer David Vendetta and singer/ songwriter Sylvia Tosun have teamed up to create VenSun. Vendetta’s house music is known the world over and Tosun has topped BillBoard Club charts. VenSun joins Vendetta’s house and electro productions with Sylvia Tosun’s introspective lyrics. “Love is Love,” the first single, is a sweeping soundtrack to the eternal struggle for human rights, including the Right to Marry. The video is available on sylviatosun.com.

Stephen King’s Carrie, the classic tale of a psychic outcast who unleashes her rage on high school bullies gets a reboot with Chloe Grace Moretz as the telekinetic titular teen and Julianne Moore as Carrie’s freaky, Bible-thumping mama. The effect of Kimberly Peirce’s (Boys Don’t Cry) directing is sure to be brutal and fantastic. In time for Halloween, this thriller hits theaters on October 18.

The third season of Scandal is back on ABC with Kerry Washington. At the end of season two, Olivia Pope’s secret had just come out into the open, the press knew about her affair, and her spy dad waited for her in a limo. What will happen now? Buckle yourselves in, Gladiators, and tune in to ABC every Thursday at 10 pm for new episodes. If you missed the premiere, check it out at abc.go.com.

NOT TO BE MISSED: Karina Iglesias’ new single, “Only Love Can Save Us, “inspired by the LGBTQ struggle for marriage equality, anti-bullying and the controversy in Russia regarding the 2014 winter Olympics. Available for download via CD Baby or iTunes. SHE - 10 - 10/13

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she magazine presented beach blanket babe & beach blanket butch during womenfest 2013 at bourbon st. pub on duval street in key west, fl. photos by tina sordellini / more photos at www.shemag.com

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in the news florida’s WILTON MANORS COMMISSION PASSES EQUAL BENEFITS ORDINANCE The Wilton Manors Commission unanimously voted on September 24th on establishing an Equal Benefits Ordinance (EBO). The EBO requires businesses that contract with the city to provide employees’ domestic partners with benefits equal to those offered to spouses of married employees. If a company does not currently provide benefits to the spouses of their employees then they are not required to provide benefits to the domestic partners of their employees. Recently, both Broward County and Hallandale Beach passed similar policies. The Wilton Manors EBO comes just two months after the passage of the city’s Tax Equity policy, which ensures that city employees with domestic partners will no longer pay thousands of dollars more in taxes than married employees pay for their partner’s health insurance coverage.

October 2013 Oct 1 - 31: LGBT History Month, National Breast Cancer Awareness Month, National Domestic Violence Awareness Month, Domestic Violence Awareness Month, National Bullying Prevention Month, National Sarcastic Awareness Month, Hispanic Heritage Month, National Sudden Infant Death Syndrome Awareness Month, World Menopause Month, World Vegetarian Month Oct 11: National Coming Out Day Oct 13: Metastatic Breast Cancer Awareness Day Oct 15: National Latino AIDS Awareness Day Oct 18: National Mammography Day Oct 20 - 26: Freedom of Speech Week

Landmark Federal Marriage Equality Case Filed A federal suit was filed in Philadelphia to declare unconstitutional the Pennsylvania statute that bans recognition of same-sex marriage legally entered into states that authorize samesex marriages. The suit was brought by a lesbian couple— Cara Palladino and Isabelle Barker—who have been together since 1998. They married in 2005 in Massachusetts, relocated to Pennsylvania for employment purposes, in 2009 they had a child. The focus of the suit is Pennsylvania’s Defense of Marriage Act, which singles out same-sex couples for discriminatory treatment by refusing to recognize their marriage licenses that were properly issued in other states. The suit also raises claims under the Full Faith and Credit, Privileges and Immunities, and Equal Protection and Due Process clauses of the U.S. Constitution.

Thirteen states and the District of Columbia permit same-sex couples to marry. Pennsylvania is one of 37 states that does not recognize legally sanctioned same-sex marriages. There are an estimated 125,000 same-sex married couples in the United States. The suit was coordinated by Equality Forum. Lead counsel is Morgan Lewis & Bockius, which has 24 offices worldwide and over 1,600 law professionals. Co-counsel is Jerner & Palmer, P.C. which specializes in representing same-sex families.

ExxonMobil Offers Benefits to all Employees’ Spouses ExxonMobil, which for years has failed to offer basic non-discrimination protections to its LGBT employees and health benefits to their families, announced it will at last recognize legal same-sex marriages and offer health benefits to same-sex spouses of its employees. Since 1999, the Human Rights Campaign (HRC), the nation’s largest lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) civil rights organization, has called on the corporation to offer equal benefits and ban all forms of discrimination. The oil giant has yet to include sexual orientation or gender identity in its official non-discrimination policy, despite numerous shareholder resolutions to do so. This means an employee can still be fired or

denied a promotion simply for being LGBT. “There is no federal law protecting employees from discrimination against sexual orientation or gender identity...One has to wonder, what good are benefits for your same-sex spouse if you risk being fired for disclosing your sexual orientation in order to access them?,” said Deena Fidas, director of the HRC Workplace Equality Program. Prior to the 1999 merger of Mobil Corp. and Exxon Corp., Mobil offered health benefits to domestic partners of its employees and prohibited discrimination based on sexual orientation. When Exxon acquired Mobil, the non-discrimination policy was removed and the domestic partner benefits program was closed to new employees.

what he said about... “Today’s court decision affirms what loving and committed couples in New Jersey have known all along: civil union is no substitute for the protections and dignity of marriage. Every day of denial in New Jersey is an emotional and tangible burden on same-sex couples and their families. Now that civil union has been proven unconstitutional in the court of law, it’s the time for the legislature to act quickly. As a lead partner of NJ United for Marriage, Freedom to Marry is working hard to secure the votes needed to override Governor Christie’s veto on New Jersey’s freedom to marry legislation so that the long wait ends for committed couples in the Garden State.” — Evan Wolfson founder and president of Freedom to Marry on September 27, 2013.

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Task Force Report: Devastating Disparities Affect LGBT Elders A new report by the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force shows that LGBT elders suffer health disparities and economic insecurities that are compounded over the course of a lifetime with devastating effects. The report “No Golden Years at the End of the Rainbow: How a Lifetime of Discrimination Compounds Economic and Health Disparities for LGBT Older Adults,” written by Erin Fitzgerald, MPA, shows that elder LGBT people face situational and systemic barriers that are continually exacerbated as they age. These include employment discrimination, lack of access to social safety nets, increased healthcare costs, and disparate treatment when accessing health care caused by systemic prejudice, heterosexism and gender stereotyping, among others. As a result, LGBT people are less likely to be covered by employer-based health insurance. “In order to effectively address all the needs of the LGBT community, Congress must pass the reauthorization of the Older Americans Act, which provides additional protections in law to vulnerable elders who face multiple barriers that aggravate economic insecurity, social isolation and various health challenges related to aging. Additionally, Congress must pass the Employment Non-Discrimination Act to prohibit discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity and expression at the federal level,” urged Barbara Satin, assistant faith work director of the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force. Key findings: •LGBT baby boomers now reaching retirement age are the first “out” generation of older adults in our history. By 2030 the number of LGBT older adults will likely double.

•Sixty-eight percent (68%) of LGBT people reported experiencing employment discrimination. Employment discrimination is not simply a onetime injustice; LGBT people experience discrimination throughout the course of their lives. •Over 55 percent of LGB people and 70 percent of transgender people report being mistreated in a medical setting. Eight percent (8%) of LGB people have been outright refused service, and twice as many trans people (19%) have been refused treatment. •In the United States approximately 28% of people living with HIV/AIDS are over 50 years old. This number is projected to grow to 50% by 2017. Each year there are more than 1,000 new diagnoses of HIV infection in men who have sex with men age 55 and older. •Pervasive lack of cultural competency in the healthcare system contributes to significant health care avoidance reported by LGB (29%) and transgender (48%) individuals compared to their non-LGBT counterparts (17%). •Fifty-seven percent (57%) of transgender people reported experiencing family rejection, which is correlated with significantly worse health outcomes than their peers who experienced family acceptance. As mainstream opinions about the LGBT community change, we see that LGBT young people’s health is positively affected by family acceptance. The Task Force has been at the forefront of LGBT aging work for many years. Their earlier reports, “Outing Age” in 2000 and then “Outing Age 2010: Public Policy Affecting Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Elders,” created and published in collaboration with Services and Advocacy for LGBT Elders (SAGE) broke new ground in bringing these issues to light.

Read full report at www.thetaskforce.org

TO DO WHERE TO GO WHAT

every wednesday wednesdays for women Dine . drink & Network at michele’s dining lounge 2161-67 Oakland Park Blvd. • 6PM - 9PM Fort Lauderdale every SATURDAY LIPSTICKs SATURDAYS for women Erons Lounge • 10PM 8201 Biscayne Blvd. • Miami Bullying & Sexual Minority Issues October 12 • 8:30AM - 4PM Coral Cables Congregational Church 3010 De Soto Blvd. • Coral Gables, FL 305.576.2126 or 954.771.4799 safeschoolssouthflorida.org Soiree—VIP cocktail reception benefiting Miami Beach Gay Pride October 19 • 8PM - 11PM 1690 Collins Ave., Miami Beach brownpapertickets.com 2013 “Not on My Watch” Anti-Bullying Summit October 19 • 8:30AM - 2:30PM FIU College of Law, Modesto Campus 11200 S.W 8th Street Miami, FL nveee.org • Free Event 2nd annual black & white gala October 19 • 6:30PM - 11PM Quantum Leap Winery 1312 Wilfred Drive • Orlando, FL thecenterorlando.org pregnancy planing for lesbians October 21 • 6PM - 7PM St. Pete Metro Center 3251 3rd Ave. N., St. Petersburg, FL metrotampabay.org 3rd annual community day October 26 • 11AM - 2PM • Free Event The Pride Center in Wilton Manors pridecenterflorida.org mary jane cunningham t-Dance October 27 • 2PM - 6PM The Manor • 2345 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors, FL • maryjanesigns.org wicked manors October 31 • 7PM • Wilton Drive wickedmanors.org

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by tina sordellini

feature

Palm Beach

Pleasures

The Palm Beach area offers a huge variety of activities, besides the miles of gorgeous beaches and fabulous shopping options.

nic backdrop provides for multimillion dollar mansions, enormous yachts, elaborate fountains, decorative statues, plush palm trees, historic museums, occasional sea life and buildings that touch the sky! Round out the tour exploring the local hotspots and extraordinary new waterfront in a way so uniquely different than ever before. Prepare yourself for a once in a lifetime experience! palmbeachsegwaytours.com • 330 Clematis Street, Suite 116, West Palm Beach, FL 33401 [ Yesteryear Village ]

Nestled on ten tranquil acres inside the South Florida Fairgrounds, the quaint town is alive in Florida history where you are transported to a different era; a simple life. Discover original and replicated buildings and artifacts from the 1850’s to the 1950’s. Children 5 and under admitted free. Discount rate for children 6-11. A recreated historic village with over 20 historic structures including a church, country store, artifacts from the State of Florida and museums. Includes the Big Band Hall of Fame. | southfloridafair.com/yesteryearVillage 9067 Southern Boulevard, West Palm Beach, FL 33421 [ Palm Beach Zoo ]

The 23-acre zoo is home to more than 1,400 animals from Florida, South and Central America, Asia and Australia. Exhibits include Florida panthers, Malayan tigers, giant anteaters, exotic birds, koalas, a komodo dragon and a white alligator. The Tropics of the Americas exhibit features Mayan pyramids housing jaguar and bush dog habitats. Children’s attractions include an interactive fountain and a carousel. | palmbeachzoo.org • 1301 Summit Boulevard, West Palm Beach, FL 33405 [ South Florida Science Center & Aquarium ]

This awesome facility houses a hands-on science center, aquarium, planetarium, museum store, special weekend programs, observatory, laser concerts, science trail, Egypt Gallery and miniature galaxy golf. Permanent and traveling exhibits. Family-oriented activities for all ages including adult lecture series throughout the year. sfsciencecenter.org • 4801 Dreher Trail North, West Palm Beach, FL 33405 [ Rapids Water Park ]

If you’re planning a visit to South Florida or a native looking for a little staycation, the Palm Beach area offers a huge variety of activities, besides the miles of gorgeous beaches and fabulous shopping options. Whether it’s just the two of you, a group of friends or you’re bringing the kids, here are just a few ways to find pleasure in Palm Beach.

South Florida’s largest water park featuring 30-action packed acres of attractions including some of the biggest, wettest, most thrilling water slides in the country. This water adventure includes a wave pool, thirty-five water slides, including dual seven-story speed slides, and a quarter mile lazy river. The park offers a full day of non-stop fun with something for everyone! | rapidswaterpark.com 6566 North Military Trail, Riviera Beach, FL 33407

[ Lion Country Safari ]

[ Jupiter Inlet Lighthouse & Museum ]

Drive through safari with hundreds of animals roaming free and amusement park with animal encounters and demonstrations, rides, shopping, food and thrills. Voted “Best Local Attraction” year after year. Now offering 5,000-foot pavilion and 1-acre, multi-purpose field with full catering options for outings of all sizes. | lioncountrysafari.com • 2003 Lion Country Safari Road, West Palm Beach, FL 33470 [ Segway Tours ]

Roll along on your own personal Segway as you enjoy historic beautiful downtown West Palm Beach and Palm Beach, Florida. The invigorating warm breeze will blow gently on your face as the guided tour begins by leisurely cruising along the picturesque Intracoastal Waterway. The sce-

Just a bit more to the north you will find this historic attraction, which offers climbing tours to the top of the landmark 1860 lighthouse, a waterfront history museum in a restored WWII Navy building, a restored 1892 Tindall Pioneer Homestead exhibit, the 100-year old Pennock Plantation Bell, native plants and habitats, the Keeper’s Deck and Workshop, a gift shop, snack shop, programs, sunset tours and weddings. | jupiterlighthouse.org • 500 Captain Armour’s Way, Jupiter, FL 33469 For more information on Palm Beach County visit palmbeachfl.com.

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feature

DID YOU

THE WOMEN OF In 1994, Rodney Wilson, a Missouri high school teacher, believed a month should be dedicated to the celebration and teaching of gay and lesbian history, and gathered other teachers and community leaders. Since 2006, LGBT History Month provides role models, builds community and makes the civil rights statement of our extraordinary national and international contributions by showcasing the achievements of 31 lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender Icons. See full list of 2013 icons at LGBTHISTORYMONTH.COM .................... . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

1. GWEN ARAUJO, TRANSGENDER HERO February 24, 1985 / October 3, 2002 Araujo’s murder helped bring awareness to violence against transgender people and the “panic defense.” “Live as though this is your last day.” 2. DJUNA BARNES, AUTHOR June 12, 1892 / June 18, 1982 Writers such as Truman Capote and Bertha Harris have cited Barnes as an inspiration for their works. “The truth is how you say it, and to be ‘one’s self’ is the most shocking custom of all.” 3. JOAN BIREN, DOCUMENTARIAN July 13, 1944 Her film “A Simple Matter of Justice” documented the 1993 March on Washington for Lesbian and Gay Rights. “My thing was to take pictures to make visible what was invisible.” 4. MANDY CARTER, ACTIVIST November 2, 1948 The National Organization for Women called her “one of the nation’s leading African-American lesbian activists.” “Sometimes you have to be bold and take a risk.” 5. WILLA CATHER, AUTHOR December 7, 1873 / April 24, 1947 She has been hailed as one of the great writers, especially for her depictions of rural American life.

“The end is nothing, the road is all.” 6. TRACY CHAPMAN, SINGER/ SONGWRITER March 30, 1964 Her first No. 1 hit, “Fast Car,” was named one of the best songs of all time by Rolling Stone. “I’d like to live as if only love mattered.” 7. BRENDA HOWARD, ACTIVIST December 24, 1946 / June 28, 2005 She organized the first Pride parade and is known as the “Mother of Pride.” “Bi, Poly, Switch—I’m not greedy, I know what I want.” 8. QUEEN LATIFAH, Entertainer March 18, 1970 Known as “Hip-Hop’s First Lady,” she is an acclaimed entertainer in music, film and television. “You have to believe in your ideas and fight for it.” 9. MA RAINEY, SINGER April 26, 1886 / December 22, 1939 Called the “Mother of the Blues,” she is recognized as one of the great female blues vocalists. “You sing ’cause that’s a way of understanding life.” 10. SALLY RIDE, NATIONAL HERO May 26, 1951 / July 23, 2012 On June 18, 1983, Sally Ride became the first American woman in space. “Young girls need to see role models. You can’t be what you can’t see.”

ABOUT... SHE MAGAZINE & SHE MAG: Fill in blank: My Coming Out Was... Lynette K—It was positive and I had and still have tons of support! Liz S—First time in my life I felt alive. Stephanie B—Started at age 15 & I’ve been coming out ever since. Alicia—My coming out is a journey. I came out to my mom when I was 14, and to my dad when I was 19. I still have more to go. Tonja E—Blowing the door off the hinges & building over! Kate S—Traumatizing and relieving. Cheree R—A weight off my shoulders! Melissa B—Subtle and scary to stand in my power. Thelma V—Very difficult, I was changing my life, ex-husband, and 4 children, and I could not be with the woman I fell in love with. But found out “who I’m.” No regrets! Vanessa D—Traumatizing yet satisfying. Jo Ann H—Hard, but I am proud that I have always been honest to myself and others. Even though, at 54, I have seen so many changes, I hope that I have inspired others to be honest and not hide. Sally C—Easier than expected! My family was happy that I was finally happy! Tianny C—A life-changing experience MJ Z—Still paying the consequences... Jeannie J—Painful. I’ve been ostracized for my relationships, but only from people that were crappy friends to begin with. Kimberly C—I’ve been coming out for 28 years since I when I was 19. I’m always coming out to people; new friends, business associates and just random people in general conversation. My friends and family were easy, with the exception of my Mom and brother (both Christians). Lainie E—Glorious! STAY CONNECTED!

- Facebook.com/SheMagazineFL Search She Mag & She Magazine - Twitter.com/SheMagazine - Issuu.com/SheMagazine

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by denise warner / photos by deborah spencer

from the cover

Unless you’ve been under a rock this year, you already know about the impact of the equal rights-inspired “Same Love” song and you’ve seen the MTV VMA Awards. So, who is this Mary Lambert that’s captured our attention? She Magazine got to spend some time with the very talented, out singer with a great infectious adorable laugh—while in New York, as her single “She Keeps Me Warm” is skyrocketing into our hearts and weakening our knees. This is what she had to say about her music, hate email, her coming out to her lesbian mom and much more. Read on... Mary! Everyone wants to know: Where have you been all our lives?

(laughs) I’ve been in the suburbs! You were stepping in front of crowds at the age of 17, reciting slam poetry in Seattle. Did you ever think you’d be onstage in Brooklyn, NY for MTV performing a platinum single?

I have to be really careful how I say this, but I think I did. I was raised in a very traumatic household and writing and music became an escape for me. I used to pretend to be onstage in front of huge crowds. So at an early age, I was pretending to perform for industry people, like “Hi, my name is Mary Lambert and thank you for having me on your show, Jay Leno.” (laughs) I was preparing for it early on. Maybe I wasn’t consciously aware of it, but on some level, I think I did see bigger things. I know I definitely dreamed it. I don’t know if anyone ever deserves it, but I know I work really hard and I feel ready for anything. You come from a very religious background. How did you even find slam poetry, rap and hip-hop?

I did songwriting and was a composer for many years, and at 18, I discovered this world [of slam poetry]. There’s a certain vulnerability to it. Your words have to literally be the music, so I think I found that to be a little un-nerving, but the reward is that it’s so positive. It’s such a positive experience. How did you meet up with Macklemore & Ryan?

I had just graduated from Cornish with my Bachelors in Music Composition so I was working towards being a professional song composer or a music teacher. I

this song, this video, this was my baby. It came from an idea I had for about two years. It was mostly because of my frustration of not having visibility in the media, speaking for myself as a

plus-sized woman who’s a lesbian.”

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was planning to go to graduate school and then my plan changed. I decided to take two years off to give myself a chance to focus on my music. So, I recorded my album. About five months after, I got a call from [a mutual friend] Hollis, who sings on Mackelmore & Ryan’s “White Walls.” Hollis said that Mackelmore was looking for someone to do the chorus on something and she said, “I think you should come in tonight and show them what you’ve got.” I flipped out. You know when people say they remember the exact moment they got that call that changes everything? I mean, I remember thinking, “This is it. This is that call.” In my head, it was a scary moment, because I was going to show the world what I was capable of. As you were making the single “Same Love,” did you have a feeling about the success of it, let alone the impact and attention it would have?

That’s the thing about when we recorded it. Hollis called at like 3pm and I had to be there at 5pm, so basically I had two hours to write. I was freaking out. But, I did it and I went in and recorded it that same night. I didn’t hear from them for two months. I guess because they were so busy at the time, and I was so passive, I was kind of like (exaggerated whimper) “It’s okay, they probably went with someone else.” (laughs) But then I got the call saying they were recording it as a single. I remember listening to it with my partner, listening to it with my mother, and just crying about how influential this song could be and the possibilities it could have. But, you know, you always want to dream big but keep your feet on the ground so you’re not disappointed if something doesn’t happen, but yes, even before my chorus was added to it, just as it was first written, I knew the song could be so much. Was anyone worried about negative controversy?

Oh yeah, I was terrified! I mean, it’s coming from a place of allies, and I’m shouting from the rooftops how gay I am, so yeah, sure I was worried and kept thinking “God, I hope this goes okay.” But I was ready. I was really ready for death threats and hate mail. I got myself toughened up and ready for the war, but there was no war. It’s all support. It’s all support. The only hate mail I get is about my weight, and that’s fine. I’m fine with that because I wasn’t getting hate mail about being gay and that gave me a whole lot more hope in humanity, even more than I had. Your performance at the VMAs this year was probably one of the most watched television events of the year. How has your life changed since “Same Love?”

This year has been so intense and has happened so incredibly fast. Things happen so fast that it takes a minute for my brain to catch up! Half the time, I’m like “Ok, yeah, this is your life now, and I can handle it,” and the other half of the time, I’m crying because I’m so grateful and so humbled. It’s the extremes, you know? A year ago, I was about to be homeless, I was sleeping on friends’ couches, worrying about dropping out of college because I had no money. Then to be in a position now, as a full time artist being about to financially support myself on a platform for gay rights, and body image, and all that—it’s what I’ve always wanted to do and it’s beyond my imagination. Then to top it off, as if that wasn’t enough- to be onstage with Jennifer Hudson at the VMAs—it’s all just too much to even comprehend! It’s too much! (laughs) To share the stage with Jennifer Hudson and hold your own note to note with a vocal superstar had to have been scary, yet you never showed a bit of nerves!

It sounds funny, but I don’t get nervous when I perform. It really is where I feel most natural and comfortable. I envy you!

It’s funny because we were about to go on, the curtain was down, everyone was back there waiting, heads down, quiet and I was so excited- I was like “Come on! This is so fun!” I was jumping around, all giddy and Charlie looks at me, and says “What are you on?!” and I was like, “What? No! I’m just totally excited!” You’ve described yourself as a ‘serial monogamist.’ Is that any harder when your face is plastered on every LGBT website and magazine in the

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country and you’ve got a billboard hit?

(laughs) I have a really great partner and we’ve been together three years now. When she met me, I was at my worst—couch surfing, three jobs, struggling. So, she’s been along through all of this and she’s been so supportive and great—and the best part is that she’s super camera shy, and quiet and way more reserved (giggles),so I get to be the star! Your song and video for “She Keeps Me Warm” is quickly becoming a lesbian favorite and nearing ‘anthem’ status. Did you get to decide how the video would look? It feels like it was based on those “early stages of love” feelings.

I produced it, and this song, this video, this was my baby. It came from an idea I had for about two years. It was mostly because of my frustration of not having visibility in the media, speaking for myself as a plus-sized woman who’s a lesbian. The thing that really bothers me is that there is amazing lesbian cinema, there are great lesbian films, there are great lesbian characters on TV shows, but I just wanted to see a video with a love story with two cute gay girls [on a human level]. Why didn’t that exist? But, wait, let me back track a bit—I’ve seen videos with girls holding hands, or rolling around in lingerie, or a girl with a boyfriend that cheats on him with another girl—but nothing in terms of a love story that happens to be relatable and gay. I think your positivity and femininity are showing the world a new brand of lesbians, after years of us having to battle the ‘bad boy Shane’ stereotype. Was there any pressure to change anything about yourself as fame came a’knockin’?

No, and that’s the really funny thing. When we kicked off the Mackelmore tour, we had a big send-off show in Seattle and I wore these cute jeansand boots with a nice shirt. Our tour manager kind of hinted that I could probably step it up a bit now and wear dresses. I was thrilled because I guess I hid my beauty and femininity a little and to me, saying “You can wear a dress” meant I could embrace the things I love about myself. They weren’t trying to make me “look” a certain way. I love to wear dresses and do my hair and make up. When I came out at 17, it was like, “Okay, am I going to chop my hair off and wear combat boots and do all the things people think lesbians do?” It took a while to understand that I could have my own identity, embrace my body image and my individuality. I read that your Mom is a lesbian, and my first thought was “I wonder if it’s easier to come out with a gay parent.”

When I was 17, I wasn’t worried about telling my parents because I’ve always been very self-assured, and confident about who I was. I had my first really serious hard core girl crush and figured out that I was gay and thought I’d just walk in and say, “Hey, hi, I have a girlfriend now, and I’m a lesbian” and everything would be fine. Instead, my Mom got kind of mad! I was like, “What the --? I thought you’d be okay with this!” It wasn’t until later that I realized it was all fear-based. Once I understood it, I was like, “Oh Mom. It’s a different time now.” Things were different when she came out, and I understood that. It definitely took a while, though. Your music, your lyrics, your voice are reaching so many people and affecting change at such an important time! Is there anything that you’re just dying to show the world?

There is so much, I can’t even tell you. It is amazing. I think that’s why I’m so driven. I have all this time now to focus on my art, the music, the videos, the concepts--it’s a dream I never could have imagined and there’s so much I want to share that I want people to know and see and hear. I think (pauses) I think I can change things! marylambertsings.com SHE - 22 - 10/13

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various events from womenfest Key West: pool parties, night events, comedy show with suzanne westehoefer and more. see you all in 2014! photos by susan kent & pearl’s / more photos at www.shemag.com

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SHE GIRL

photos by boi-photography.com / more at www.shemag.com i live in: Sunny St.Petersburg, FL My occupation: My partner and I own Sappho Moon Events, a company that hosts events for the LGBT community. I also have a few other money makers, including hair & makeup artistry, gogo dancing, bartending and some modeling. Dream Girl: My dream girl is sexy and mysterious. She has hazel eyes and strong features. She seduces me in another language. She’s a multi talented, creative woman who knows what she wants, and cares about what I want at the same time. She is a muse to me and I have already found her! Dream Job: My dream job will be a reality within the next few months when I travel to New Zealand to do hair and makeup for a music event called “Freedom Shout.” My mother thinks I: Am crazy for getting tattoos. Turn-ons: Sense of humor, tattoos, confidence, intelligence. Turn-offs: Bad hygiene. My Best Quality: My caring, fun loving personality. my pet: Broccoli, my malti-poo and Buchi, the silky terrier. the last book i read: The War of Art by Steven Pressfield. I have a weakness for: Bacon and anything pumpkin spice. I like to wear: Combat boots and bows in my hair. If you could have one super power, what would it be and why?: Time Manipulation because I would have the power to

change the past as well as the future. Sensitive Body Part: Wouldn’t you like to know? If my life were made into a movie, my part will be played by: Megan Fox. Supposedly, she is my celebrity look

alike. I would prefer Chelsea Handler because she is much more entertaining. my greatest accomplishment: Finding my soul mate. my favorite tv show: Law & Order and anything on the Food Network. my favorite quote: “Everything happens for a reason.” The last thing I listened to on my iPod was: I’m more of a Pandora listener. I would say Lana Del Ray is probably the last artist I listened to. I love her. Celebrity’s butt I would most like to squeeze:

Nicki Minaj. My most memorable date: When I flew to New York City to

convince my now significant other to UHaul it to Florida. The cartoon character I am most like: Pocahontas. My coming out was: Much easier for me than it was for others

in the community. I am blessed to have family and friends that love and support me, no matter what. if you could change your name, what would you pick: Maybe something a little more exotic. i first kissed a girl at age: 12. my favorite flower: Tiger Lily. The weirdest thing I ever ate was: Gator Nuggets. I think the LGBT community needs: To support and

respect each other more. if you were to become an activist in the lgbt community, which organization would you choose: I

feel very strongly about anti bullying. It strikes a nerve within me to see how hateful children can be to one another. Any organization that promotes anti-bullying has my support. SHE - 24 - 10/13

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by Stephanie Papadakis / / photos by olivia

travel

Dream a little dream of sun, sand and 1,900 lesbians cruising the eastern Caribbean with the world’s premiere travel company for lesbians, Olivia Travel. February brings the Caribbean Equality & Leadership Cruise, which will take place February 1 - 8, 2014. This historic cruise features an unprecedented line-up of national leaders and invited guests, including Dr. Maya Angelou, DOMA plaintiff Edie Windsor, and signature Olivia entertainment such as the Indigo Girls. Departing from Fort Lauderdale, FL and sailing to the beautiful ports of Grand Turk, San Juan, St. Thomas and St. John, and Olivia’s own private island, Half Moon Cay, this is one trip you won’t want to miss!

> grand turk, turks & caicos Start your trip off in Grand Turk, Turks & Caicos, only 524 nautical miles from Fort Lauderdale. Relax on miles of untouched beaches just waiting for you to bask in the sun. Explore, snorkel and deep sea fish in the third largest barrier reef in the world, located just before the sea floor drops 7,000 feet.

> san juan, puerto rico

In Puerto Rico, the Latin rhythms and tropical breezes of Old San Juan will seduce you as you wander its narrow cobblestone streets with colorful colonial buildings, explore centuries-old fortresses overlooking the ocean, visit fascinating museums and see local handicrafts on every corner. Swing down a zip line in the tropical rainforest, tour the Bacardi distillery or take an ATV ride through the beautiful eastern countryside, splashing across creeks and swerving through towering forests.

> st. thomas The lush, mountainous island of St. Thomas in the U.S. Virgin Islands offers stunning vistas and a dazzling array of beaches, and is one of the best duty-free shopping ports in the Caribbean. Nearby St. John retains a tranquil, unspoiled beauty and offers an abundance of hiking trails through dense forests and some of the very best snorkeling at the world’s only underwater national park.

> private island, half moon cay Your last stop leaves you in the Bahamas on the pristine private island, Half Moon Cay, and offers SHE - 26 - 10/13

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everything you need for a day in paradise: a two-mile crescent of perfect beach; an interior lagoon; horseback riding to the island’s highest point; parasailing and snorkeling; and a stingray adventure, where you can learn about the behaviors, habitat, feeding and breeding of stingrays.

> at-sea days What about the at-sea days, you ask? Olivia has plenty of activities to keep the fun going all day and night. A fabulous Superbowl party is in the works for the first day at sea, where you can sport your favorite team’s flare and cheer on the big game. There will also be dance lessons, wet-n-wacky pool games, bingo, nightly entertainment, theme parties and a unique leadership summit featuring extraordinary leaders in our community.

> the leadership summit The leadership summit will begin in Fort Lauderdale with keynote speaker Dr. Maya Angelou. She is best known for her work as a civil rights activist, feminist icon and author of I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings (1970). Through poetry, song, film, theater and education, Dr. Angelou has left her mark on history as one of the most renowned and influential voices of our time. Edie Windsor will also be on board to discuss her momentous victory defeating DOMA at the Supreme Court. Joining Dr. Angelou and Windsor will be Col. Grethe Cammermeyer, the LGBT civil rights activist who initiated the fight to serve openly in the military; invited guest Rep. Debbie Wasserman Schultz, Florida Congresswoman and Chair of the Democratic National Committee; Meredith Baxter, actor and LGBT activist; Indigo Girls Amy Ray & Emily Saliers, LGBT activists & singer-songwriters; Karen Williams, comedian, activist and motivational speaker; C.C. Carter, performance poet and activist; Kate Kendell, Executive Director of the National Center for Lesbian Rights; Elizabeth Birch, former President & Executive Director of HRC and President/CEO of The Elizabeth Birch Company; and Kris Perry and Sandy Stier, the California Prop 8 Plaintiffs who challenged the State Supreme Court and won. Every night, the theater will come alive with signature Olivia entertainment. Indigo Girls will be on board to perform an intimate evening of music and song. Also performing are the always hilarious comediennes, Vickie Shaw, Karen Williams, Suzanne Westenhoefer, Judy Gold and Gina Yashere; performance poet C.C. Carter; and alt-country female rock band Antigone Rising. So what are you waiting for? Enjoy this once in a lifetime experience in a space where you can be out and free as you sail through the idyllic eastern Caribbean with these national leaders, entertainers, and almost 2000 women on an all-lesbian chartered ship. For more information about this trip, reservations and payment plans, call 800.631.6277 or visit www.olivia.com/shemag2013 SHE - 27 - 10/13

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with material girl

just 4 fun Breast Cancer Crusade Pin avon.com >> $3

Everlast Training Gloves amazon.com >> $23.99

Mini Boyfriend Watch coach.com >> $228

Evelyn Lauder Lip Collection

bcrfcure.org >> $29.50

Pinktober Pin

hardrock.com >> $12

Block Letter Key Ring

coach.com >> $48

Wilson’s Hope All Court Tennis Balls.

New Balance Women’s Fall Komen, XS-XXL

bcrfcure.org >> $34.50

tennis-warehouse.com >> $23.99

Conair Ceramic Straightener

Hard Rock Pinktober Tee

amazon.com >> $19.99

hardrock.com >> $26

Stainless Steel Ring

The Komen Paris Laptop Backpack amazon.com

thebreastcancersite. greatergood.com >> $12.71

>> $97.99 / free shipping

Sporty Sandals

thebreastcancersite. greatergood.com >> $26.21

Spanish Tee

shopkomen .com

>> $14.95 Yoplait

Heart Necklace thebreastcancersite.greatergood.com >> $10

savelidstosavelives.com

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check your

BOOBIES >> October 18th <<

National Mammography Day The third Friday in October each year is National Mammography Day, first proclaimed by President Clinton in 1993. On this day, or throughout the month, women are encouraged to make a mammography appointment. Every person should know the symptoms and signs of breast cancer. Most people who have breast cancer symptoms and signs will initially notice only one or two, and the presence of these symptoms and signs do not automatically mean that you have breast cancer. By performing monthly breast self-exams, you will be able to more easily identify any changes in your breast. Be sure to talk to your healthcare professional if you notice anything unusual. A change in how the breast or nipple feels

• Nipple tenderness or a lump or thickening in or near the breast or underarm area • A change in the skin texture or an enlargement of pores in the skin of the breast (some describe this as similar to an orange peel’s texture) • A lump in the breast A change in the breast or nipple appearance

• Any unexplained change in the size or shape of the breast • Dimpling anywhere on the breast Unexplained swelling of the breast (especially if on one side only) • Unexplained shrinkage of the breast (especially if on one side only) • Recent asymmetry of the breasts (Although it is common for women to have one breast that is slightly larger than the other, if the onset of asymmetry is recent, it should be checked.) • Nipple that is turned slightly inward or inverted • Skin of the breast, areola, or nipple that becomes scaly, red, or swollen or may have ridges or pitting resembling the skin of an orange Any nipple discharge—particularly clear discharge or bloody discharge

• It is also important to note that a milky discharge that is present when a woman is not breastfeeding should be checked by her doctor, although it is not linked with breast cancer. Stay informed at nationalbreastcancer.org

helpful links

floridabreastcancer.org arrowlbt.org doh.state.fl.us/chdDeSoto komen.org nbcam.org cancer.org

.................................

.............................................................................. cccfoundationinc.org yestomammograms.org komencentralflorida.org komensuncoast.org floridahospitalwomen.com flbreasthealth.com SHE - 29 - 10/13

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noticias El 65% de peruanos está en contra de la unión civil homosexual El 65% de los peruanos está en contra del proyecto de ley que plantea permitir la unión civil homosexual, mientras que un 26% lo aprueba, señaló una encuesta de la compañía GFK publicada en un diario local. El sondeo, realizado en Lima y otras 25 ciudades del país entre el 23 y el 25 de septiembre, precisó que la mayor oposición a la iniciativa se da entre las personas de 40 a 70 años, segmento en el que alcanza un 74%, y entre los hombres, donde llega al 69%. El sondeo también señaló que un 45% de los entrevistados está de acuerdo con el papa Francisco cuando declaró que los homosexuales son “heridos sociales” y merecen la misericordia de Dios, mientras que un 33% desaprobó esa apreciación y un 22 % no opinó. La iniciativa de Carlos Bruce generó críticas de políticos y representantes de la Iglesia católica, como el legislador Carlos Tubino y el cardenal Juan Luis Cipriani, quienes la rechazan al considerarla un “matrimonio encubierto”, y respaldo de representantes de la sociedad civil, que la apoyan por reconocer derechos y reivindicaciones para la comunidad homosexual.

XXII Marcha del Orgullo LGBTIQ en Buenos Aires La Comisión Organizadora de la Marcha del Orgullo LGBTIQ anunció en septiem bre la celebración anual que nuclea a todos los miembros de la comunidad LGBT. La marcha de este año se llevará a cabo el sábado 9 de noviembre y la movilización tendrá como consigna principal la Educación sexual igualitaria, libre y laica. La Marcha del Orgullo LGBTIQ es coordinada por la Comisión Organizadora integrada por el conjunto de organizaciones de la diversidad sexual de la Ciudad de Buenos Aires. El evento comenzará a las 3PM en la Plaza de Mayo, donde tendrán lugar la Feria del Orgullo, recitales y discursos por cada una de las identidades sexuales participantes de la movilización. A las 6PM, como todos los años, comenzará la Marcha del Orgullo con la tradicional caravana por la Av. de Mayo hasta la Plaza de los Dos Congresos donde tendrá lugar el acto de clausura, el show central y fuegos artificiales. La consigna principal de la XXII Marcha del Orgullo LGTBIQ de este año es la de Educación sexual igualitaria, libre y laica, en un claro apoyo a la vigencia de la Ley de Educación Sexual Integral (Nº 26.150) y un fuerte reclamo para que se aplique efectivamente

en todas las provincias argentinas y en la Ciudad Autónoma de Buenos Aires. La segunda consigna de la marcha es la implementación de la Ley de Identidad de Género en la salud con la cual se le reclamará al Ministro de Salud de la Nación, Dr. Juan Manzur, que reglamente de manera urgente esa Ley para garantizar el acceso a la salud integral de las personas trans.

Otras de las subconsignas de la marcha: • No a la discriminación en radio y televisión. • Ley Antidiscriminatoria para todos y todas. • Basta de justicia machista y para pocos. • Derogación de los Códigos de Faltas. Basta de violencia institucional! • NO a la xenofobia, el racismo y al sexismo.

Encuesta a estudiantes secundarios de España acerca de la homofobia Según una reciente encuesta realizada por el Colectivo de Lesbianas, Gays, Transexuales y Bisexuales de Madrid (COGAM), el 41,8% de los alumnos de colegios secundarios de la capital española siente que el profesorado hace poco o nada ante los insultos a quienes son o parecen gays, lesbianas o trans. Por su parte, un 27,4% se muestra algo en desacuerdo y sólo un 30,8% totalmente en desacuerdo con esta afirmación. El estudio, realizado a 5,272 alumnos de escuelas secundarias, también muestra cómo, entre quienes sufren acoso escolar por razón de su orientación sexual, sienten humillación (63%), impotencia (60%), rabia (59%), tristeza (59%), incomprensión (57%), soledad (53%), vulnerabilidad (50%) y aislamiento (50%). “Es necesario, que los equipos directivos, apoyados por la administración, incor-

poren la diversidad afectivo-sexual y la intervención contra el acoso homofóbico, y que se sensibilice a todo el equipo docente sobre la necesidad de ello,” afirmó Ángel Lázaro, vocero de educación del COGAM. Los alumnos encuestados han participado en el programa de charlas-talleres “Expulsemos la Homofobia de los Centros de Enseñanza”, subvencionado por el Ministerio de Sanidad y Política Social, a través del programa Red Educación de la Federación

Estatal de Lesbianas, Gays, Transexuales y Bisexuales (FELGTB), en 37 colegios secundarios de la Comunidad de Madrid, durante el curso 2012-13. En la actualidad, son muy pocos los colegios secundarios de España con protocolos de intervención programada para la educación en la diversidad sexual e identidad de género y la prevención del acoso escolar homofóbico. “El acceso a los centros escolares es discrecional: depende del interés del equipo educativo y padres y madres. Eso supone que muchísimas alumnas y alumnos no reciben durante toda su etapa escolar ninguna referencia a la diversidad sexual o de género excepto los insultos. Tendemos la mano a la comunidad educativa para que se enfrente a esta realidad con responsabilidad”, remarcó Uge Sangil, coordinadora del Área de Educación de la FELGTB.

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yo soy mujer

por veronica espinal

No te sientas invencible...

fotos: campaña revista quien/mexico

¡CUIDATE desde HOY! ¿Cuantas campañas había escuchado, años tras año? ¿Cuántos exámenes había pospuesto? ¿Cuántas voceras había escuchado? ¿Cuántas cintas rosadas me habían dado? Sí, me refiero al cáncer del seno, mejor dicho la prevención del mismo. Un día de tantos, mientras me bañaba, se me ocurrió explorar mis senos. ¿Y por qué no? ¡Después de todo vivo eternamente enamorada de ellos! Ya lo había hecho una vez anteriormente y bueno, sentí tantas cosas que realmente no sabía qué era lo que buscaba. Hay tantas glándulas y cosas raras allí dentro que todo al tacto se siente feo. Pues bien, la próxima vez que palpé mis senos… esta vez sí encontré algo que no era normal. Esta vez era una bola, dura, casi como una bola de ping pong, una bola que podía mover de arriba abajo y de lado a lado. Obviamente se me fue la vida a los pies. En ese momento me acordé de todo lo que antes había oído, mas no escuchado. En ese momento me acordé de lo que las campañas de concientización enseñaban. Salí del baño y me acosté en la cama, con el brazo hacia arriba y una almohada debajo la espalda (que es mucho más efectivo), para volver a palpar. Efectivamente, ahora la pelota era más accesible. Me pare frente al espejo con los brazos en alto y sí, igual podía ver la diferencia entre un seno y otro. No lo podía creer. No podía creer que a “mi” me hubiese salido algo así. Entre a Internet a buscar cuanta información se me ocurrió para saber qué era esto que había encontrado. No sabía que era exac-

tamente, pero sí sabía que era algo anormal, algo diferente a lo que antes había tocado. Entre otras cosas descubrí que dependiendo del lugar dónde está situado el tumor, es que se puede asumir si es maligno o benigno, esto claro es antes de hacer la mamografía. Para esto, el seno se divide en cuatro partes. Si el tumor está situado en la parte de arriba, entonces esta más propenso a ser maligno. El mío está precisamente en el medio de la parte fuera del seno, lo cual era peor para mi pues no había certeza ninguna. Podría ser cualquier cosa. Obviamente había que hacer la mamografía, cosa que nunca antes me había ocupado de hacer. La preocupación más inmediata que tuve fue el cómo me iba a costear estos exámenes si no tengo seguro. Después de averiguar, conseguí una prueba gratuita con la organización Susan G. Komen quienes me dirigieron a unos de los hospitales que ofrece esos servicios. Fue un gran alivio, al menos ya había saciado una de mis preocupaciones. Los días se hicieron eternos y la angustia no se hizo esperar. Los pensamientos negativos y la obsesión con el tumor aquel eran tal que lo tocaba a cada rato y sentía como crecía con los días. La mente no paraba de pensar y era imposible evitar el llanto y de preguntar por qué yo tenía que pasar por aquello. Sin embargo, dentro de mí, muy dentro, yo sentía que no tenía por qué temer. Al fin llego el día. Llego mi turno. Ver aquellas maquinas y la tecnología actual frente a uno puede ser un tanto intimidante. Si

nunca te has hecho una mamografía, te diré que duele, duele y duele. Aquella maquina presiona el seno de tal manera, aunque necesaria, que te quita la respiración. Gracias a Dios el tumor resultó ser solamente tejido graso que se forma, si mal no recuerdo por las hormonas mismas. Gracias a Dios no era necesario extirparlo, no era necesario tratamiento y mucho menos era necesario la quimioterapia no el tratamiento de radiaciones. Lo único que tengo que hacer es revisarme cada cierto tiempo y ahora en Diciembre hacerme de nuevo la mamografía. Ya casi 5 años que me sucedió esto, pero quise contar mi historia de nuevo para que este mes, cuando las organizaciones hagan sus campañas, prestes atención y te examines diariamente. No dejes de atenderte para que no lo descubras cuando sea demasiado tarde. Siempre pensamos que estamos exentas de ser presa de tal mal, sin embargo como mujeres estamos a riesgo y se vuelve una ruleta rusa que no podemos escapar. Además, no sólo como mujeres, sino que por ser mujeres gay estamos expuestas a un mayor riesgo. ¿Las razones? Una de ellas es el no poner a trabajar las glándulas mamarias y no producir leche materna por, obviamente, no dar a luz (al menos la gran mayoría de las mujeres gay). Otra es que, según la Universidad de Colorado, las mujeres hispanas / latinas con cáncer del seno suelen ser más jóvenes y tener tumores que son de mayor tamaño y en un estado más avanzado. No te sientas invencible. ¡Cuídate desde hoy!

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lisa pittman and pandora events presented shedonism vegasâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;the official womenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s events of las vegas pride at various locations. photos by angie ortaliza / more photos at www.shemag.com

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with marissa cohen

on the shelves

Blue is the Warmest Color The film version of Julie Maroh’s award-winning graphic novel Blue is the Warmest Color won the 2013 Cannes Film Festival’s prestigious Palme d’Or Prize and Steven Spielberg called it “a story of deep love and deep heartbreak.” Blue follows Clementine and her fiery affair with the charismatic and blue-haired Emma. The book itself is gentle, sexy and passionate, a swan song to lost love and desire. If you’re a fan of graphic novels such as Fun Home and Strangers in Paradise, you’ll love this artistic and tender look at young lesbian love.

Miami Recognition Dinner in Miami Beach / Oct ‘10

If You Could Be Mine by Sara Farizan This stunning Young Adult debut from Sara Farizan brings the reader into lesbian life in Iran. When Sahar falls for her best friend Nasrin, she understands that her love could lead to imprisonment or death. When Narsin’s parents announce her arranged marriage, Sahar hatches a dangerous plot to take advantage of Iran’s law allowing sex change operations, planning to transition from female to male in order to marry the woman she loves. Daring, tender, and a searing look at gender laws in Iran, If You Could Be Mine is a groundbreaking YA novel of epic proportions. Giraffe People by Jill Malone Award winning novelist Jill Malone (Red Audrey and the Roping; A Field Guide to Deception) gives us this clever and potent novel about love on a military base. Fifteen year old Nicole “Cole” Peters has never rebelled against her parents’ wishes, preferring instead to play sports and hang with her boyfriend. But when Meghan, the athlete her family is sponsoring for entry into West Point, enters the picture, Nicole falls in love and her entire world - including her family - changes forever. Malone’s third novel about coming of age and finding your voice is fresh and well-crafted.

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with the village sage

scopes AQUARIUS JAN 21 - FEB 19

leo July 23 - aug 22

Volatile planetary energies will cause chaos in your life unless you make a consistent effort to keep your temper. Power-struggles and angry confrontations will shake relationships, both personally, and professionally, so it’s best to avoid them. You will be held accountable for what you say and do, and more importantly, for what you don’t. Make sure your ducks are in a row.

You feel pressured to make vital decisions, and you fear making the wrong ones. Move forward with confidence, armed with the knowledge that you have the ability to change direction if need be. Embrace well thought out changes but avoid making impulsive, and risky moves.

pisces feb 20 - mar 20 Make a commitment to avoid engaging in power struggles as that will only make difficult situations worse. Instead of dwelling on past disappointments, clarify what you want now, and create a vision for a better future. Plans and strategies must include harsh realities, if you are to build a strong foundation. Make sure everyone involved is on the same page to ensure success.

virgo aug 23 - sept 23

aries mar 21 - apr 20

libra sept 24 - oct 23

Relationships of all kinds are highlighted, especially those involving finances. However, it’s in your own best interest to cooperate, compromise and avoid conflict. Go for win-win solutions. Don’t take shortcuts, pay attention to details, and make the extra effort in order to avoid having to do it again. Work out to get rid of stress.

You have the opportunity to reinvent and promote yourself. Ask yourself important questions concerning your current situation. Be honest about your fears and hopes. Allow yourself to break free of past restrictions and disappointments. Review your past expectations and make necessary adjustments. Enjoy intriguing new connections without disrupting your security base.

taurus apr 21 - may 21

scorpio oct 24 - nov 22

You are having conflicting feelings between wanting security and freedom. You can have your cake, and enjoy being in stable, committed relationships, without giving up your autonomy. Be open to other people’s ideas and opinions. Practice the art of compromise and you will come up with win-win solutions. Use your creativity to break up the ho-hum daily stuff.

You have the opportunity to reinvent and promote yourself. Ask yourself important questions concerning your current situation. Be honest about your fears and hopes. Allow yourself to break free of past restrictions and disappointments. Review your past expectations and make necessary adjustments. Enjoy intriguing new connections without disrupting your security base.

gemini may 22 - june 21

sagittarius nov 23 - dec 21

Always a bit of a risk taker, you’re more than willing to put relationship security on the line to break free of commitment restrictions, and/or responsibilities. Don’t allow your devil-may-care attitude to loved ones’ reactions sabotage your relationship. Don’t ignore boundaries or push partnership limits or you’ll suffer the consequences. Instead, find stuff to do with one another, to one another, for one another.

Circumstances present you with opportunities to either make important breakthroughs or have dramatic breakdowns. The planets are giving you permission to get out and play. You’ll have to employ the ‘edit button’ before speaking your mind. It might be a good idea to make sure what you meant to say was what was understood. You will be recognized for who you are and what you do.

cancer June 22 - july 22

capricorn dec 22 - jan 20

You’re torn between really wanting and needing to make positive changes in your life - and really not wanting to mess with the status quo. The good news is you can do both by making positive changes. The planets, however, won’t make it easy, as relationship, and financial challenges threaten both your emotional balance and your checkbook balance. Don’t overreact. Remember, your goals cannot be achieved without self-confidence.

Your personal life will demand your attention in very negative ways and you won’t be happy about it. Try not to react in ways that create more conflict. Instead, take the time to address the situation without wasting your energy clashing with others. Don’t let your stubbornness, or pride, prevent you from making needed changes. Use trusted sounding boards to clarify your thoughts. Learn from the past, look to the future, and try to stay balanced in the present.

You’re intensely focused on your finances. One of the best things you can do immediately, without any capital at all, is to improve your communication skills to include all the other people involved. Stay centered in your power, stay sure of your vision, but be flexible about ideas and strategies for success. Already existing conflicts may come to a head.

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She Magazine—Oct '13