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Peaceful Notes V O L U M E


Angel Tree Project


Shannon West


Kim Watson


DV Corner Christmas CD

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Community action


How can you help


Donors list


Board of Directors Nancy Martin Chair Brent Phelps Vice-Chair Chris Cole Secretary Betsy Wilson Treasurer Kim Britt Debbie Eller Ruth Kincaid Terri Neiderhammer Shell Pearce Rose Reighard Dr. Jane Roberts Jennifer Bowman Regina Hartley Greg Cornett Deborah Teeters Morris Reaves Kelly Pritchard Lida Martinat Shelter Home Phone Numbers: Main Number: (828) 758-0888 Crisis Line: (828) 758-7088 24 hours a day

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A Partnership in Service to Victims in Two Counties The Shelter Home of Caldwell County would like to welcome the Domestic Violence Resource Center of Alexander County into a new partnership. Both Agencies will be working together to serve the victims of domestic violence and sexual abuse in Caldwell and Alexander counties. The Shelter Home will administer the state grants for both programs and will provide emergency shelter. An office will be staffed in Taylorsville to provide victim advocacy, Information and coordination of services and Court Advocacy The two programs are partnering in service and sharing resources to better meet the needs of victims across both counties. The partnership extends to the Catawba County Rape Crisis Center, who provide advocacy and services to Rape and Sexual Assault victims from Alexander County. To our partners in Caldwell County without

whom victims would go un-served, thank you, so very much for your partnership in service! To our future partners in Alexander County and Catawba County, we look forward to learning about the opportunities and resources that are available there to assist the victims with our programs work with. We Are All In This Together! Let us share and partner for the greater good

“Raising the Roof ” on the Renovation and Expansion Project The Shelter Home expansion and renovation project is in full swing! Brushy Mountain Builders has contracted to expand the 4,500 square foot 7-bedroom existing shelter to 9,000 square feet with 16 bedrooms. The ability to provide safe shelter and critical services to more women and children to meet the growing demand for people escaping the violence and abuse in their lives is a privilege. The opportunity to expand the shelter and renovate the existing space is a blessing. Local private foundations and individual donors along with funding from the Federal Home Loan Bank and the NC Housing Finance Agency, and in-kind materials donations from Caldwell County Habitat for Humanity have made this Possible.



To those Secret Santas in our community,

Thank you ! For making Christmas possible for the ladies and families on the Shelter Home “Angel Tree”




Angel Tree Project Girls On the Run Every year the Shelter Home forms an Angel Tree for Christmas. This list consists of the clients that have received our services over the past year. Many of our families have just started over in a new home, and cannot afford to buy very much for their children for Christmas. We develop a list of wants and needs. We then, and an individual, organization, church, or business that will sponsor a family from this Angel Tree list. For the Secret Santa's in our community who partnered with us in making Christmas possible for these ladies and families, Thank You!

“Girls on the Run” group from Dudley Shoals Elementary School visited the Shelter Home as a part of their commitment to community. They brought items to meet the basic needs of ladies and children in the Shelter AND they brought Christmas

The Shelter Home has a new child advocate, Shannon West. She began her job in September when Lori Jarvis resigned. On the day she was interviewed there were eleven children in the Shelter Home proper and eight in the Transitional House. The children ranged in age from 315 years. Shannon does intake interviews with the children and the parent. Some of the problems she has noted are aggressive behavior, especially by boys, and manipulation. On entering the Shelter Home some children have had to change schools which has upset them. Although no one is indentified at school as staying at the Shelter Home, other children usually figure this out when the school bus stops at the Shelter. Older children are frequently embarrassed by this. Shannon has a B.A. degree in Psychology and Child Develop-

ment from Campbell University. However. One of the biggest surprises, and also the most enjoyable aspect of her job, is how much she is constantly learning. She had previously worked in a camp for at-risk children, and her long-range plans have been to be an advocate and/or counselor for such children. During the school year Shannon presents programs in middle schools and high schools in Caldwell County about how to avoid and report abusive relationships. The program is called “Choose Respect” and consists of four sessions. So far she has been able to present the program to Communities in Schools groups in the high schools but hopes to be able to share this with regular classes. Generally the program is well-received by students and teachers. She has found that

presents too! Thank you ladies, for your commitment to making your lives and the our world a better place!

some boys particularly have a mindset that violence is the answer to many problems. West Lenoir and Hudson Middle Schools have allowed her to present “Choose Respect” to most of their classes. She hopes to be permitted to share information with other schools later this year. Shannon would welcome volunteers to help with the children at the Shelter. Parties or outings would be helpful. Volunteering to have a story time for the younger children would be appreciated. Persons with special talents for crafts, painting, music, etc. are invited to share them. Shannon is excited about her new job and has now moved from Cleveland NC to Hudson soon where she has purchased her first home. “Welcome to our community, Shannon!”

We are still collecting used cell phones, ink cartridges and small electronics for our funding raising drive. Donate today!







Kim Watson is the new Court Advocate

Kim Watson’s goal in life has been to help others. She is a life -long resident of Buffalo Cove in Caldwell County. She earned an associate degree in human

services at Wilkes Community College. As part of her college education she worked two semesters at the Shelter Home of Caldwell County. She worked in many areas, but her main love was helping the court advocate, Jan Smith. When Jan went on maternity leave in July, Kim was hired as a temporary replacement. When Jan decided to work part time so she could be home with her new baby, Kim was hired full time. Although Kim had a good background, she continues to take training via the Web and plans to attend some seminars. She is working hard at developing relationships with local judges and lawyers. As court advocate she is able to present options to clients—both residents of the Shelter Home and non-residents. She also accompanies them to court which helps relieve their fears. Most peo-

ple are anxious going to court for a speeding ticket but to have to face someone who has abused or threatened you can be terrifying. The final decision of what to do is ultimately left up the victim. Kim finds one of the hardest things about her job is seeing victims ask for a dismissal of a restraining order—many times done repeatedly by the same victim. Reasons for this may be that they think the abuser will change as he/she has often promised before. Also, the abuser may be the father of their children and she thinks that the children need him. Sometimes there is fear of the abuser carrying out his threats to harm her or have the children taken away. When she was asked about any hobbies, she replied that as a single mom she had little free time. She is mother to a teenager and another child who is a college student. She does enjoy walking and bike riding and is active in her church, especially with the youth group. Kim wants to make a difference for good in the lives of the people with whom she works and realizes this takes time, patience, and love.

Dealing with Depression, Stress and Domestic Violence during the Holiday Season. Season The holiday season for many is a time filled with happiness and joy. Many people spend the season with family and friends. The smiling faces of children when they see Santa andthe beautiful nativity scenes can cause joy and happiness in people. Unfortunately , not everyone experiences happiness during the holiday season. Some folks suffer from the holiday blues, becoming a victim to stress and depression. Stress can take over one’s life during the holiday season, especially when trying to find that perfect gift for a loved one. Fighting between mothers and fathers over money and gifts leads to more stress. Financial stress is a big cause of depression and flaring tempers in many cases. Depression is not uncommon during the holidays. Some people are unable to be with family and friends and depression may be a natural response. Sadly, Thanksgiving and Christmas are prime times for abusers to exert control over their victims.

The abuser knowing the victim wants to be with family and friends may use this to have more control which causes even more stress. Excessive alcohol consumption over the holidays unfortunately adds to an unhealthy mix when stress is high, and self-control is lessened. Communication has to be a high priority for everyone. Talking about your feelings in a calm manner is the most important thing to remember. If you feel the situation is headed in the wrong direction, try to remove yourself from the other person, so each person can cool down. Then, come back together after things are calm. If you do find yourself in a abusive relationship, it is critical that you get immediate help. Go to a relatives or friends house. Using the seasonal stress to excuse a beating or verbal assault is not right. Abuse is abuse no matter what time of year it happens. Some women will defend and make excuses for their abuser such as “ The holidays are hard for him” or “He or She didn’t really mean it.” We all have the right to live without violence and

abuse—especially from those we love or who say they love us. There are many resources available in our community that will offer help especially during the holidays. Churches , shelters and local police are available to help. Should you need us please call 7580888. May the Holidays bring you PEACE , Happiness and Goodwill !! Lisa Triplett, Domestic Violence Program Manager






Christmas CD For Sale The Shelter Home has something to help bring pleasure and joy to your Christmas season. This is a CD of Christmas music by various Caldwell County musicians. All musicians donated their talents. The CD may be purchased from any board or staff member. Also at Caldwell Arts Council and the Music Center. The cost is $10 and proceeds benefit the Shelter Home.

The only real blind person at Christmastime is he who has not Christmas in his heart.

Helen Keller

How can you help? Our Biggest need! We are in great need of paper products. Items like paper towels, tissue and paper plates. As well as Cleaning products. Thank you for your support.

Volunteer Adrian Gray spends eight to twelve hours a week organizing clothes and supplies at the Shelter Home. Adrian first starting volunteering at the “Raise the Roof� event. She was one of the 4 people who stayed on the roof of Krispy Kreme for the Whole 24 hours.

Calling all Volunteers! If you ever wanted to volunteer to help make a difference the Shelter Home needs you. We have openings in child care, reception and donation processing. Hours are very flexible.

Gamewell Optimist Softball Wake-a-Thon 12 hours, 23 girls, and $2,000 was raised to support the Shelter Home mission by the Gamewell Optimist Softball players. Thank you, ladies and many thanks to the parents and coaches of players who supported these girls in their community involvement. You Rock! If you would like to raise funds for the Shelter call 758-0888.

Autumn Chandler chose the Shelter home for her Senior Project. Autumn collected donations and money for the Shelter Home. Thank you for your support! If you would like to intern, use the shelter home for a project please call 758-0888


We are grateful for your monetary donations January– November 2012 Foundations Bank of America Charitable Foundation Inc Bernhardt Furniture Foundation George Foundation North Carolina Community Foundation The Coffey Foundation The Jonas Foundation Whitener Foundation Z. Smith Reynolds Foundation Businesses/Organizations Altrusa Club of Caldwell County Caldwell Arts Council Caldwell County Caldwell County Board of Education Caldwell County DSS Caldwell County Local Chapter NCSSA Cato’s Fashions of Lenoir DAVA Unit # 6 Adjutant/Treasurer Early College Students/CCC&TI Family Violence Grants Program Foothills Framing Gamewell Optimist K & K Auto Parts Knights of Columbus Krishall's Basket Case Lenoir Housing Authority Lenoir Service League Lenoir Trade Center Lift NC Coalition Against Sexual Assault Tarheel Home Furnishings The Koinonia Class Town of Gamewell United Way Of Caldwell County Volunteer Burke W/C Properties Of Lenoir, LLC West Caldwell High School William Lenoir Middle School Churches Buffalo Cove Baptist Church Cedar Rock Baptist Church Church of Resurrection Hope College Avenue Baptist Church Confidence Advent Christian Church Fairview Presbyterian Church Faye Messick Circle Fellowship Baptist Church Inc First Baptist Church of Hudson First Prebyterian Church of Lenoir Flemings Chapel Baptist Church Grace Chapel United Methodist Church Hartland Baptist Church Hattie Steele Missionary Circle Hogan Family Foundation Inc. Hudson United Methoist Women King's Messengers Sunday School Class Lower Creek Baptist Church Poovey's Chapel Baptist Church Resurrection Hope Church of God St Francis of Assisi Catholic Church St James Episcopal Church St Johns Lutheran Church St Stephen's Lutheran Church Stella Austin Mission Group Unitarian Universalists / Caldwell County United Methodist Women / Lenoir United Methodist Women / Lenoir United Presbyterian Church United Presbyterian Women of the Church Whitnel Penticostal Holiness ChurchWord In Truth Ministries Yadkin Valley Baptist Church Zion United Church of Christ

Individuals AD Carswell Alex & Loren Carmichael Allen & Nancy Clay Allen Alfaro Amy & Talmadge Dunn III Amy Jolly Andrew Suddreth Ann Hancock Ann Miller Annette Beam April Holsclaw Austin C Pearce Autumn Chandler Basil & Linda Roberts Betty A Atwater Betty M McRee Beverly & Judy Beal Brad & Catina Anderson Brandy M Greene Brent Phelps Bruce W. Vanderbloemen Cami Hepler Candace Allen Clark Cathy Eller Minton Cecelia M Hartsell (CJ) Curtis Cynthia & Charles Pipes Danielle E Reid Danny & Tamara Gilbert Darrell & Dena Greene Darrell & Dottie Lloyd Donna Whitson Dr & Mrs. Robert S. Belk Dr Annie K Prestwood Edwin C Schell Elaine Rhodes Elizabeth (Betsy) Wilson Elton & Cathy Read Evelyn Marshall Frank & Faith Davison Gail S Poe George & Patsy Smith Gregory & Pamela Pilkenton Gregory De Stefano Grey Scheer Hal Armstrong Harriet M Hines Holly Mclaughlin Hope Supris Jacquelin & Eric Jenkins James & Candace Collins James & Lisa Bennick James (Jim) & Gail Dudley James R Demay Jan & Ryan Smith Jane Carswell Roberts MD Janice & Jerry Pritchard Jason G Auman Jeanne & Sandy Winkler Jeff & Rita Joines Jennie L Cannon Jerry & Millie Brooks Jill Duffy Jeff & Rita Joines Joanna R Mickel Joe Doll & Bev Frye John & Tammy Wallace John C Jarrell Johnna W Coffey Jonnie E Laws Joseph & Donna Moody Joyce & Barry Edwards

Individuals Continued Judy Hodge Kaye Reynolds Keith & Lana Gilliam Kendra Byrd Kenneth & Clarence Phillips Kenneth & Frances Johnson Kenneth & Pat Bryant Kevin & Jeannette Anthony Kimberly Lynn Hefner Lavina Smith Leanora D Hepler Lee Ann & Steven Luman Len & Katrina Benton Lisa & Boyd Taylor Lisa Clontz Lisa Marie Black Lois Clark Mac & Peggy Martin Mack & Lori Jarvis Margaret Bush Marilyn H Boughman Marjorie O Strawn Mary C Crews Maxine L Jett Megan Franklin Mr & Mrs M.L. Moore, Jr Mr & Mrs RW Bratcher Myra A Dickson Nancy T Martin Nelson Watson Norma Suddreth Norman Shronce Pamela Thomas Pauline M Laney Peggy Winkler Planet Green Randy & Patricia Burke Rebecca & Timothy Boone Rev Parker & Patricia Williamson Robert & Beth Vonnegut Robert A Mullinax Jr Robin Bratcher Ron & Rebecca Jernigan Ronald & Linda Hefner Ronald J Speights Rose Reighard Ruth Bible Class Ruth L Kincaid Sandi Shumaker Sharon P Herman Shirley Gray Shirley H Robbins Stephen & Jean Branch Steve & Connie Strange Steven & Jennifer Greer Sue & Tate Mckee Sue Bumgarner Susan & Bob Powers Susan Bowman Teresa Martin Terri S Niederhammer Theresa & Paul Clark Jr Timothy & Regina Clark Todd & Erin Penley Vickie Townsend Virginia B Mullis Walt & Karen Stroup Winnefred I. Harding

Shelter Home Staff The Shelter Home provides crisis services 24/7 and is able to do this because of a fine staff which is dedicated to making the Shelter Home a place of “Hope, Help and Healing”.

Sharon Poarch, Executive Director .................................................................... Jan Nash, Business Manager ............................................................................. Kim Watson , Court Advocate .......................................................................... Lily Moody, Rape & Sexual Assault/Child Advocate ........................................ Lisa Triplett, Domestic Violence Program Manager ........................................... Hope Bumgarner, Volunteer Coordinator…………………………………… Shannon West, Child Advocate………………………………………………… Shelter Managers: Barbara Price ..................................................................................................... Tina Gilbert ....................................................................................................... Anita Hicks…………………………………………………… …………………… Jan Smith……………………………………………………………………...…… E-mail us or Contact us at: 828-758-0888 Fax: 828-758-8949

We’re going GREEN- If you would like to help, Please request your newsletter be sent by email. Send request to or simply call (828) 758-0888 ask for Hope Bumgarner. Thank you!

Return Service Requested PO Box 426 Lenoir, NC 28645

December Newsletter  
December Newsletter  

In this issue we discus the new partnership with DVRC , the Domestic Violence Resource Center of Alexander County. Along with Staff introduc...