Images and Writing By: Kristin Regan
Homeless. They see me around town. Everyday on the same streets. Grimey. Lazy. Homeless. They don’t know I work everyday. They don’t know how hard it is to keep a steady income when you have. Nothing. Judgmental eyes see me walk down the ally. To shelter. If there wasn’t shelter, I would have to sleep on the streets. Illegal. Trespassing. Tickets I can’t afford. You see me everyday on the same streets. Don’t think you know me because I’m homeless. How would you feel if you were, abandoned? Life torn out from under you. No job. No hope. Forget the struggles you may or may not have. And put yourself into my shoes. Tell me how you feel now that you have, NOTHING.
Live for Today. Live fast, die young. They always tell me that life’s short. But, do we make it this way? Do we pressure ourselves into dying early? Do we really need to live so quickly? Take your time, you’ll be fine. Stop and enjoy what you have. ‘Cause tomorrow it might not exist.
REMEMBER Remembering all the fights we got into. That dumb look on your face when you didn’t know why I was mad. Remembering all the emotional bullshit that I had to deal with. Somethings didn’t seem so bad. But it all still hurts. Like a freshly cut open wound. Pouring salt into it, Just to cause more pain. Remembering the way you spat out my name like venom, Acting like you didn’t care. Remembering when we finally made up… And the way you said you would always be there. I guess you could say I’m haunted by my past relationship, I thought was perfect. I guess you could think I was wrong. I guess you could say that I’ll never be over him. Remembering the way you cried And told me you’d come back for me. I could see the pain in your face when you said goodbye. Remembering hearing you say you’d be back in a week for me. And the pain I felt when I realized you lied. It’s been 9 months since I’ve seen your face. Almost 6 since I’ve heard your voice. I really, really don’t want to miss you anymore, But… I don’t feel like I have a choice.
Release I want to release you. Your memory. Your face. Your laugh. Your smile. I want to release the feelings I have towards you. The love. The hared. The sadness. The ache. The pain. I can’t move on till I release you. I can’t move on till you release me. I miss you. Do you miss me too? I’ve been hoping so. But. That’s why I need to release you. I have too much hope. For you. For us. I can’t hold onto that anymore. It’s not fair. To me. To anyone. I can’t let you haunt me. Silence. You lost me. No chance for more hope. Trembling. I try to forget you existed. Stumbling. I try to get over you. Remembering. I try to release your memory. My heart’s racing. Forgetting. I try to fall in love with someone new. Hoping. I try to make my life better than it’s ever been. Promising. I try to live everyday to it’s fullest. Wondering. Will I always be this way? Will life always be so difficult?
Published on Dec 19, 2012
This Zine is called Loved, Lost and Lived. It goes through a plethora of different emotions of a girl and the life that she has lived so far...