How to Share a Happy Life Together Marriage can be a lot more difficult than you think it is. It always seemed easy with mom and dad.
Perception They were together and that was it, period. They had their occasional fights, but it was easy to choose sides at the time—whoever sided with you was your victor for that day. For everything else, everything just seemed to work out. One or both of your parents had a job to support the family. You always believed you had enough money to buy a Toys-R-Us store, it’s just the parents never let you have whatever you wanted. When there were disagreements between them, they talked about it for a while and tried to resolve it. Life was much more simple back then because the parents just seemed to have it all figured out. Now it’s your turn though.
Reality You found the special interest of your dreams, you went through a fancy marriage ceremony and are just waking up to the realization that you’re married, and you’re terrified. Who is that person you’re living with? You’re bound to this person for the rest of your life now. Are you sure you know them as well as you thought you did? What about the fact that what’s yours is ours now? Suddenly everything is in both your names and you’re not sure how to handle that. Starting a life together comes with a lot more compromises than you ever thought before. How are you going to be able to provide the same steady support of united parents to your children when you’re not sure how you’re going to make it through the next seven days?
Luckily, you aren’t the only one wondering how they can make a marriage work like their parents did. Every generation wonders the same thing, and they often look to their elders for a good example.
It’s All About Respect The following is one great tip to help you learn to share a life as you start a new life together. That tip is to respect each other as people. Marriage isn’t about acquiring a spouse; it’s about joining two lives together. Its being with your best friend as much as you can and letting them be your best friend. Your best friend has hobbies, interests and opinions. Those hobbies, interests and opinions are often what drew you together in the first place. Instead of trying to conform all of those to your own, marriage is about letting them still be people while you enjoy their company (and vice-versa). That means you discuss instead of lash back on your discussions about Colorado insurance, for instance. You may have what you consider to be the right opinion on Colorado insurance, but that doesn’t make what your spouse has to say any less important. Respect the opinion and talk it through to make things work. That said, there are certain parts of yourself that you save for your spouse to keep a happy marriage (like fidelity), but you would lose your best friend if they conformed to everything you thought. So respect their opinions and differences. Respect for a spouse is needed to make a relationship work long term. That’s what makes a marriage work. Photo Credit: lorenkerns, Auzigog, tommie m via PhotoPin cc