Page 1

setapartgirl

LE SLI E L UDY’ S

MAGAZINE

set free

from SELF PROMOTION, p.8

Godly Guy/Girl Interaction Straightforward Advice from an anonymous warrior-poet p.28

The Beauty of True Hospitality p.86

THE EXCELLENCE TEST

How do you measure up? p.58

MEET RACHEL

sister of the common life p. 102

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.

SE P T/ OC T 201 1


letter from leslie BESTSELLING AUTHOR FOUNDER, SET APART GIRL

For me, fall always ushers in a sense of new beginnings. Whenever the weather takes a cooler turn, I feel the desire to go out and buy myself some school supplies and get a shiny new lunchbox (though I do refrain from actually doing it - that would be a little weird). When I was growing up, every autumn before the new school year began, my mom would take me on a special shopping trip, where we’d buy pencils, paper, a backpack, some new clothes, and of course, a colorful new lunchbox! It was always so exciting to gear up for a new season; to start fresh with a new collection of perfectly sharpened pencils, and imagine what the new school year would bring. It was a chance for a clean start and a new beginning - full of potential and possibilities. But even though those school days are long past (which in many ways I’m very glad about!), it is wonderful to know that, with Christ, every day is a fresh, new beginning; another incredible opportunity to explore the endless frontier of knowing Him. As it says in Lamentations 3:23, “His mercies are new every morning.” If your walk with Christ has grown even a little stale or same-old, I encourage you not to settle where you are! There is so much more to discover, so many more ways to grow in intimacy with Him. I pray that this magazine issue will inspire you to pull up your tent stakes and take another step (or leap) forward into the vast, exciting adventure of the Christian life. When He is our life, the future is always bright. “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans...to give you hope and a future.” (Jer. 29:11 NIV)

Leslie Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


letter from annie CREATIVE DIRECTOR

Generally speaking, when we set out to accomplish a task, project, or assignment, we have in our minds an idea of how long it will take or just how much of us we’ll need to give. Knowing this can be greatly beneficial in managing our time well, but if we allow this “plan” to rule our lives and affect our joy when things do not go according to plan, it becomes robbery in our Christian walk: robbery of our joy, peace, outward focus, and most importantly, God’s glory being seen through our attitude and countenance. The design process for this issue has been a fresh reminder of not just preparing well, but surrendering well. This issue did not get done in my timeframe. There were lost files, project interruptions, technical complications, wrong photos, and long, long hours of design far beyond the calendar days planned. But one of the great joys of surrender is that everything we once would call “ours” is now His; and as we learn this new pattern for life we find that frustration now becomes perseverance, loss becomes opportunity for doing it better the second time around, long hours beyond “the plan” acquaint us with His strength, and when the inspiration well runs dry, we get the grand reminder that everything we need is found in Him alone! Surrender presses us into dependency, but think, dear sisters, upon Who we get to be dependent upon in all things - the High King of heaven, the Almighty Beloved, the Living Word, the Defeater of death, and the matchless Creator! So here’s to another issue provided by the grace of this One alone, from many surrendered lives that take great delight in being HIS. May you too, through these pages and in the unfolding of a new season, find such a delighted surrender!

HIS and yours,

annie

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


set apart femininity Explore God’s Sacred Intent for Your Life Top 10 Time Wasters, Part 6 Lost Art of True Beauty

8 18

set apart relationships

Honoring God in Love and Romance

y it l a it p s o H e u r T The Beaut y of

Godly Guy/Girl Interaction My Soul’s Husband Love Lets It Go

28 40 48

set apart walk

Cultivate Your Daily Romance with Christ The Excellence Test Finishing the Father’s Work

58 70

set apart motherhood

Discover God’s Heart for Home and Family Creating a Stable Routine The Kiddo Spot

78 84

set apart style

Showcasing the Radiance of Christ The Beauty of True Hospitality

86

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.

6 8


58 28

18 ineveryissue 7

our contributors

37

q & a with Leslie

68

staff book recommendations

92

photo spread

102 sister of the common life 112

reaching the orphan

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie.  All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


setapartstaffintroductions leslie

FOUNDER, SET APART GIRL

Leslie Ludy is a bestselling author and speaker with a passion for reaching her generation with the hope of Christ. She and her husband Eric have been writing and speaking together for the past seventeen years. Widely known for their bestselling classic, When God Writes Your Love Story, Eric and Leslie have become foremost voices on some of the most poignant issues facing the Church today, such as relationships, purity, holiness, and living a fully consecrated life for Christ. Together, they are the authors of eighteen books that have been translated into over a dozen languages around the world. For more about Leslie’s books, click here. Leslie and Eric are the founders and directors of Ellerslie Leadership Training based in Windsor, Colorado – an intensive discipleship training program that prepares future leaders for world-impacting Christian service, and draws men and women of all ages from around the world.

annie

CREATIVE DIRECTOR

Annie Wesche is the Creative Director for both setapartgirl and Ellerslie Leadership Training. As editor and designer of setapartgirl online magazine, Annie has won the hearts of young women around the globe with her sense of style, warmth of manner, and passion for Jesus Christ. Annie’s heart is gripped with a love for orphaned and vulnerable children and she has traveled internationally as a professional photographer to tell their stories and champion their rescue.

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


contributors

setapartwriters

tessa hershberger

WRITER | OHIO

Tessa Hershberger is 24 years old and from Akron, Ohio. She currently serves in the Editorial Department for setapartgirl, where she keeps busy writing and editing articles, as well as planning for the upcoming print magazine. She is passionate about the return of Biblical masculinity and femininity, as well as a Christianity in which the victory and grandeur of the Gospel is the living reality of the Church. With a desire to be used of God to take that reality to the nations, she is particularly burdened for the people of Thailand, where she previously spent time staffing and teaching in a School of Biblical Studies with Youth With a Mission.

amy meyers

WRITER | ILLINOIS

Amy moved to Colorado in May of 2010 from a small town in Illinois. Since childhood, she has had a tremendous passion for both Jesus Christ and the written word. Now, at age 22, Amy joyfully serves in the Editorial Department of setapartgirl, beautifully combining her two greatest delights into one amazing job. When she is not busy writing, editing, or helping out with various other ministry tasks, Amy enjoys slipping away to snag some much-loved kiddo time.

setapartphotography lauren torres

PHOTOGRAPHER | ILLINOIS

This 22 year-old small-town girl from Illinois moved to Colorado for Ellerslie Leadership Training and quickly won our hearts through her love for beauty, her eye behind her Canon lens, and her passion for young women to encounter Jesus Christ. Now serving in the Creative Department of setapartgirl, Lauren’s elegant style and creative inspiration will cause you to fall in love with her work.

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


f l e S

10

TOP TIME WASTERS Part 6

By Leslie Ludy

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie.  All rights reserved.  

No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


PROMOTION Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Philippians 2:3 (NIV)

W

hen I was about twelve or thirteen, I decided I wanted to be a famous Christian singer. I think it was attending an Amy Grant concert that first planted the idea in my mind - a beautiful young woman on stage, decked out in a dazzling outfit, belting out catchy tunes in front of thousands of adoring fans under a canopy of stunning lights and smoke. Who wouldn’t want that kind of attention and applause? I’d been singing, performing, and writing music since the age of six. People were always telling me I had real musical

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


that’s what the famous Christian singers did. They “ooo-ed” and “aahed” the crowd with their amazing abilities, basked in the cheers and adoration, and then made sure to throw in the statement, “All the glory goes to God!” There were a lot of goodies that came from being in “music ministry:” applause, fame, fans, and of course, money. And at the same time, everyone was impressed with how great a Christian witness you were. Not a bad arrangement, if you asked me.

talent and that I was a natural performer. The applause, the excitement, and the adrenaline of being on stage in front of a crowd was something I’d grown to love. Society constantly inundated me with mantras such as, “Go for your dreams!” and “Do what makes you happy!” Well, this was my dream. Singing and performing made me happy. And I knew that if I worked hard enough, I could achieve my goal of using my gift to get the recognition and exciting lifestyle of a Christian musician – all under the banner of “using my musical talent for the glory of God.” After all,

So, I told my parents what I wanted to do with my life. I was careful not to emphasize my desire for applause, money, and fame, and I merely told them I wanted to be a Christian singer/ songwriter when I grew up. Naturally, they wanted to help me reach my goal. They signed me up for voice lessons, took me to countless musical auditions and songwriting competitions, encouraged me to participate in every church or school play that came along, and even hired a producer to help me write and record my own music. Along the way, all of the music industry experts we met offered us plenty of tips on how I could “make it in the music biz” or get discovered by a talent scout from Nashville.

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


“You need to go get a professional photo shoot done,” one music producer told me. “Get some 8x10 glossies printed, and give them out everywhere you go to help build your image.”

“You’ve got to write up an impressive bio,” I was told. “Write down all the competitions you’ve won, the awards you’ve received, the musicals you’ve starred in. Make it sound larger than life.”

So, I went to a modeling agency, got my make-up and hair done by a professional, and had my 8x10 glossies made.

I labored for hours to concoct a bio that would make people say, “Wow, that girl’s got some serious talent. Look at all she’s already done, and she’s so young!”

Self

“You definitely need to record a

“You need to promote yourself...”

professional demo album,” another producer told me. “Put your best songs on it, and then give it to anyone you meet who’s connected with the music industry. You never know when a record company might hear it and want to sign you to a contract.” As a result, my parents forked over thousands of dollars to a producer who helped me record my first demo album.

The more I connected with the Christian music industry, the more I kept hearing the message, “Promote yourself, promote yourself, promote yourself.” On numerous occasions, I was encouraged to walk up to a perfect stranger and hand him my demo album along with an 8x10 glossy photo of myself. If I hesitated, I would immediately be lectured and corrected. “Leslie, in the music business, if you snooze, you lose! You can’t wait around for people to notice that you’ve got a gift. You’ve got to get in their face and let them know who you are. Make sure they don’t forget you. Shameless self-promotion is the only way you will ever get a record deal!” (No, I am honestly not exaggerating – these are the exact

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


The Christian life is not about selfpromotion; it’s about self-denial. words I heard, time and time again, from Christian music professionals.) At fourteen, I attended a huge national conference for aspiring Christian musicians. Thousands of people from all over the country came to learn how to “make it big” in the music industry. I quickly realized I wasn’t the only one trying to promote myself and my music talent. Every person I met was talking about how they had met a record producer who showed a lot of interest in their demo album or how they won the songwriting competition so that gave them a lot of great exposure, or howthey had met Michael W. Smith personally, so that gave them a great foot in the door. It seemed to be an

entire subculture built upon selfmarketing. No one really ever talked about the fact that this “promote yourself” mantra wasn’t exactly a Scriptural idea. Sure, we called ourselves Christians and we wanted to honor God with our music skills. Selfpromotion was just a necessary step to gaining the platform we needed. How else would we ever get famous enough to wow the crowds with our talents and then “give all the glory to God?” It wasn’t until God radically got a hold of my life at the age of sixteen that I began to awaken to His heart on the matter. When I made the decision to completely and fully surrender my life to Jesus Christ, He began to shine His searchlight upon my music dreams. I suddenly realized how foolish I’d been; how self-focused this entire pursuit was. It hadn’t really been about His glory - it had been about my own ambitions and desire to be seen, appreciated, and recognized. I repented of my sin. I laid my music dreams down at His feet. From that day on, I knew that I would never touch music again unless the Spirit of God compelled me, and it truly brought glory to Him instead of me. No more demo albums. No more songwriting

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


competitions. No more hob-knobbing with music professionals. I saw so clearly what a waste of time and energy it had all been. I was not called to be a “Christian” musician. I was called to be a Christian. And the Christian life is not about self-promotion; it’s about selfdenial. ~~ You don’t have to been an aspiring musician to fall into the trap of selfpromotion. Whether it’s the pursuit of a guy, the pursuit of popularity, the pursuit of a career, or the pursuit of a ministry platform, young women are constantly pressured to make sure they are seen, noticed, and appreciated.

I know God has called me to start a ministry. I better get out there and let people know about it! I should start a blog, get some big-name endorsements for the book I’m writing, see if I can get myself invited to speak at a big conference, get on the radio, and go hob-knob with all the big names in the Christian world. How else am I ever going to get a chance to share the message God has put on my heart? Modern Christianity only caters to these mentalities. Well-meaning books, counselors, and advice columns offer us the same simple solution to any dilemma we might be facing:

When am I finally going to meet Prince Charming? How am I ever going to find him? Should I try a little harder to get a guy’s attention - maybe create a really nice profile of myself for an online dating service? Or spice up my Facebook page with a few more photos of ME? After all, I’m not getting any younger, and I don’t want to wait forever! Or, Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


Want to find your future husband? Promote yourself! Put together a really impressive Facebook page (include a few pictures of yourself in a swimsuit for good measure), join an online dating service, socialize at singles’ groups, and make sure that all the men out there know you exist! Want to get elevated in your job? Promote yourself! Make sure the boss sees all the great things you are doing for the company. Subtly drop hints about your uniqueness and value. Don’t

waste your time with the little obscure jobs that no one else will see. Make sure other people notice all your amazing skills. Make a name for y o u r s e l f s o t h a t y o u d o n ’t g e t overlooked! Feel called to start a ministry? Promote yourself! Get an agent, come up with a catchy name for your message, and find your unique “niche” in the Christian world. Get yourself out there. Look for the big opportunities and put yourself in front of people over and over again,

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


until you finally gain the recognition and credibility you deserve! And underneath it all is the resounding message, “Go for your dreams!”, “Do what makes you happy!”, “If you live to your glory, you’ll bring God glory!” Today’s young women waste countless hours, days, weeks, months, and even years self-promoting. Making sure we are seen. Ensuring we don’t get overlooked. Putting ourselves in front of others so they’ll notice all that we have. We even try to spiritualize it, thinking that if we promote ourselves, we’ll become more influential for God’s kingdom, or we’ll finally find our future husbands and fulfill our call to be married. There are plenty of Christian books and messages out there that tell us as much.

He does not call us to be noticed and applauded by the world. He calls us to decrease, more and more, that He might increase within us. “…whosoever of you will be the chiefest, shall be servant of all.” (Mark 10:44 KJV)

“If I then, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to But what does God say? wash one another's feet. For I have given you an example, that you should “If anyone would come after me, he do as I have done to you.” (John must deny himself and take up his 13:14-15) cross and follow me.” (Matthew 16:24 NIV) “God resists the proud, But gives grace to the humble.” (James 4:6) “…everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself In God’s kingdom, recognition and will be exalted." (Luke 14:11 NIV) honor are not sought for and strived after, but given by God alone. And they come not to those who have Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


exalted themselves, but only to those who have taken take the lowest place, just as He did. Only those who have been faithful in the small things are invited to be faithful in bigger things. He does not call us to be noticed and applauded by the world. He calls us to decrease, more and more, that He might increase within us. (See John 3:30.) This doesn’t mean that having your own blog, website, or Facebook page is wrong in itself; but it is vital that these platforms are merely tools to point others toward Christ, and not ourselves. For more practical tips in this area, see my article on Facebook HERE (go to page 8).

“He that is down need fear no fall. He that is down cannot get between God and His glory. And we knew then that there was nothing He could not do through us if only we were nothing.” I challenge you today to allow God’s searchlight to shine within your soul. Here are some questions to prayerfully consider:

area of my life?

Do I feel that I must fight to be noticed, seen, and appreciated?

Am I willing to take the lowest place and serve unnoticed behind the scenes, or do I feel the need to be recognized?

Ian Thomas wrote, “The Christian life can be explained only in terms of Jesus Christ, and if your life as a Christian can still be explained in terms of you – your personality, your willpower, your gift, your talent, your money, your courage, your scholarship, your dedication, your sacrifice, or your anything – then although you may have the Christian life, you are not yet living it.”

Have I been self-promoting in any

Am I trying to be seen by the opposite sex and using selfpromotion to get attention from guys?

Do I trust God to write my love story, my life story, and my ministry story without human promotion, striving, and manipulation?

Amy Carmichael said, Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


If God convicts you of self-promotion, ask Him for the grace to turn and walk the opposite direction. Instead of wasting time building up your own image and reputation, begin investing yourself in the unlovely people, the undesirable tasks, and the unglamorous roles. Begin living for His smile alone, rather than the approval of others. Soon you truly will be living a life that brings glory to His name – even if no one ever knows yours. *

Note from Leslie about Fear, Part 2: This month, I intended to write Part 2 for the Time Wasters article on fear, however, after praying about it I felt compelled to write Self-Promotion instead. Please look for Fear, Part 2 in our November/December issue!

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


How beautiful and how delightful you are, My love, with all your charms! (Song of Solomon

Copyright 2010 The Church at Ellerslie.  All rights reserved.  

7:6 NASB)

No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellersli


B

TBeauty True

the lost art of

B

Excerpt taken from Leslie’s book

The Lost Art of True Beauty

By Leslie Ludy

Photography & Design by Jade Valcarcel Copyright 2010 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellersli


T

M

y freshman year of high school, I joined a modeling agency. It was one of those places that promised to turn you into a goddess in just six weeks. The fact that I had braces, glasses, frizzy hair, shockingly pale skin, and super-bushy eyebrows supposedly did not matter; nor did the fact that I was g a n g l y, a w k w a rd , a n d u t t e r l y s t y l e challenged. I was assured that the amazing instructors and make-up artists at this worldclass institution could transform even the ugliest duckling into the most glamorous swan. So, week after week I showed up, learning how to apply bronzer to the top of my cheekbones, how to tame my wild hair into a silky-smooth texture, and how to walk with my neck high and my hips forward (just in case I was ever recruited to strut down the runways of Paris). I was even taught how to do a mock TV commercial for Maybelline, looking flirt-atiously into the camera and coyly unveiling my amazing beauty secret to the world – a brand new volumizing mascara.

hair that never went limp, and “of-themoment” clothes straight out of a Guess catalog. I, on the other hand, was plagued with ghostly pale skin, frizzy brown hair, hopelessly crooked teeth (and thus three miserable years of braces), and a disturbing ineptness at making my outfits look even remotely trendy. At that point in my life, I had never been described by the opposite sex as “hot” or “pretty.” The most I could hope for was that guys would label me as “nice” and want to be friends with me. But a large majority of them used me as verbal target practice. They could sense my insecurity and found great delight in pouncing on it.

I still remember walking home from school one May afternoon, my skinny legs revealing my glowing white skin beneath a knee-length skirt. A carload of high school boys suddenly drove by, and one of them yelled mockingly, “Get a tan!” I was deeply mortified. (I will spare you the story of my subsequent attempt at using self-tanning cream, which I’m not really sure why my parents agreed to ended up making me look strangely akin to this ridiculousness, and even paid for the one of those garishly orange Uumpa-Lumpas classes, no less. I think it had something to from Charlie and Chocolate Factory.) do with the fact that they felt sorry for It had been easy enough to me. For years, I had been feel like a princess when mercilessly teased about my I was eight, watching appearance every day at Walt Disney princess school. I was desperately movies and then insecure. It always seemed twirling around the like other girls could backyard in a frilly achieve effortless beauty, dress. But the while I struggled and older I became, and strived but never got there. the more of the real Most of my friends had world I experienced, beautiful olive skin with yearthe more I began to feel round tans, salon-perfect blonde

. . .it always seemed like other girls could achieve effortless beauty, while I struggled and strived but never got there.

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


She was first time a guy asked me I thought he was beautiful – but it was out, joking and started to It didn’t matter that not a contrived beauty, l a u g h . A n d w h e n m y p a re n t s h a d guy told me I propped up by outward another repeatedly told me, was pretty, I was “You are beautiful things like clothes and make- shocked. I looked at just the way you him in confusion and up. Rather, it seemed to then are!” My youth blurted, “Really?” leader’s lesson on emanate from “accepting your own For all the time I spent inner beauty and chasing after the culture’s somewhere within getting comfortable in beauty standard, I never her. your own skin” had not seemed to actually “get there.” like an ugly stepsister instead of Cinderella.

helped. And my school counselor’s lectures on the importance of self-esteem hadn’t made even the slightest difference in my life. The bottom line was that I wanted to be beautiful - not with some vague “inner beauty” that had no value in the real world, but with the kind of sexy, alluring, culture-pleasing appeal that I saw on billboards and TV. Somewhere between playing with my frilly dress-up clothes and doing the fake Maybelline commercial shoot, I had become convinced that this was the one road to true happiness and the only way to find real love.

Sure, I might have graduated out of my frizzy-haired, pale skin, gangly and awkward phase. But no matter how much make-up I put on, I still didn’t look like the covers of Seventeen or Vogue. No matter how much I deprived myself of fries and milkshakes, my thighs never seemed to get

T

I’m not sure if modeling school made any real difference in my physical allure. I certainly did not look like a model by the end of it. One thing I do know - I spent nearly every waking moment of my life for about two years trying to make myself more appealing to the culture and to the opposite sex. Eventually, all of my efforts did achieve a measure of outward beauty, and I finally began to gain guys’ attention. But the ironic thing was that I still felt hopelessly ugly. The

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


as skinny as the girl on the Abercrombie poster. And no matter how many guys showed interest in me, there were always scores of other girls that got far more male approval than I did.

happiness to protect I felt a gentle what was right. I used assurance in my heart that t o d r e a m a b o u t meeting a gallant He had a tremendous plan prince who would be fascinated by all the for my life; something far amazing qualities he more fulfilling than the saw in me; a man who slay dragons path I’d been pursuing. andwould conquer kingdoms

My search for feminine beauty, marred and tainted by modern society, had led me to an existence entirely centered upon myself. Instead of pursuing the elegance and nobility that my fictional childhood heroines exuded, I was pursuing the sensual standard of popculture. Instead of twirling around in a flowing princess dress, I was sauntering down the halls in skin-tight designer jeans and push-up bras. There wasn’t anything graceful or feminine about it.  It was all based on sex.  The sexier you were, the more beautiful you were.

in order to win me for his own.        But by the time I was fourteen, I had come to the sad realization that modern guys couldn’t care less about feminine grace or nobility.  They measured your worth based on the size of your chest and the shape of your body.  They measured your desirability based on how quickly they could get you into bed.

It was anything but a fairy tale, and I was anything but a princess. In all of the fairy tales I’d grown up with, the heroine might have been beautiful but she was not admired for her sex appeal.  Rather, she was admired for her poise, grace, gentleness, courage and feminine charm. 

Modern culture scorned fairy tale femininity. Nearly every magazine cover or fashion ad portrayed the same image of “beauty” - a haughty-looking young woman with an icy scowl on her face, waifish clothes draping her anemic body, and her lifeless eyes lacquered with ghoulish black liner.  This, apparently, was the standard for womanly allure - the type of girl that guys were attracted to and that society applauded.

When I was young, I had spent hours imagining that I was a captivatingly lovely heroine, exuding a sweetness and charm that caused even the birds to come rest upon my finger as I walked through the forest. When I saw injustice, I would quickly rush to offer help and protection.  And when confronted with evil, I would sacrifice my own personal

So I traded in my pursuit of true feminine beauty for the cheap counterfeit presented by the culture. The result was a season of hellish misery; throwing myself at guy after guy, only to be used and carelessly discarded; tossing all dignity and modesty to the wind and flaunting my body everywhere I went; exchanging wholesome conversation

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


He gave me a breathtaking vision for true feminine beauty – His vision. for profanity and crudeness; ignoring the needs of others and adopting an attitude of selfishness and rebellion; filling my mind and heart with the perverted images of Hollywood and the media. Of course, since I was a Christian, I put limits around how far I let these things go in my life.  I always made sure I was a step or two ahead of my secular peers when it came to morality, but that didn’t keep me from being steeped in compromise. From the world’s perspective, I was on the right track to becoming a desirable young woman; a woman that had forsaken the archaic, restrictive, old-fashioned ideas about feminine modesty and dignity and embraced the empowerment of a selffocused, sensual existence.  But a couple of years into this pattern, I finally recognized how empty my life was.  I had male attention – but it only led to one broken heart after the

next. I had a measure of sensual beauty – but it only made me feel like a sex object.  I had social status and popularity – but it made me feel fake and shallow.  I had parties and entertainment – but they made me feel slimed and dirty. It was right around that time that I encountered a young woman in her twenties who was altogether different than any modern young woman I’d ever seen.  She was a missionary. She was the most radiant girl I’d ever met. Her face literally glowed. She was beautiful – but it was not a contrived beauty, propped up by outward things like clothes and make-up. Rather, it seemed to emanate from some-where within her. Her eyes sparkled with passion. Her smile lit up an entire room. She was entirely othersfocused and seemed to completely lose sight of herself. Most men groomed by modern culture wouldn’t have given her a second

Copyright 2010 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie


T

Listen, O daughter, Consider and incline your ear; Forget your own people also, and your father’s house; So the King will greatly desire your beauty; Because He is your Lord, worship Him…The royal daughter is all glorious within…Her clothing is woven with gold.

look. She didn’t carry herself with the seductive, flirtatious air that guys always seemed to respond to. She didn’t dress to show off her figure. In fact, she didn’t pursue guys at all. She was far too busy living out a passionate romance with Jesus Christ to be pining after an earthly prince. She did not posses worldly allure, but she had something far better - a radiant loveliness that reminded me of the princesses in my childhood fairy tales. It was obvious that her beauty was the real thing – and it far surpassed the hollow counterfeit I’d been chasing after for so many years. I was awed and inspired by what I saw. Suddenly, all I wanted was to be a little girl again – carefree and innocent, floating in my frilly princess dress and pretending to be a fairy tale heroine. The souped-up sensuality and shallow, self-focused femininity I had pursued in recent years had brought nothing

(Psalm 45:10-11, 13)

but heartache. When I pondered how far I’d strayed from true feminine beauty, I felt heavy with regret. Was it even possible now to return to those days of childhood innocence? Could my femininity ever be restored after I had spent years throwing it to the wind? That night, I knelt beside my bed, tears of remorse streaming down my cheeks. “God, forgive me!” I cried. “I have strayed so far from You. I have chased after empty, worldly things for so long. All the while I’ve been proclaiming to be a Christian, I’ve been living for myself. Forgive me for allowing my femininity to become so twisted. Restore me and shape me into the kind of girl You designed me to be. Cleanse me from the filth of the world and make me new.” Though I had distanced myself from God for two years, that night I felt His presence like never before. I knew He had heard my prayer. And I felt a gentle assurance in my

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


heart that He had a tremendous plan for my “Her presence lends its warmth and health to life; something far more fulfilling than the all who come before it; if woman lost us path I’d been pursuing. But first He needed Eden, then such as she alone restore it.” my life. - Said of Lucy Hayes, First Lady in 1821 During the next season of my life, my femininity was completely transformed. My “She seemed endowed with a peculiar magnetism when you were in her presence understanding of beauty was radically so that you could not help thinking yourself in altered. God didn’t merely restore my the presence of a being much higher than the childhood innocence and return me to the ordinary run of humanity. I have heard her days of dressing up like a princess. Rather, He gave me a breathtaking vision for true pray, and she could offer up the finest petition to the Throne of Grace of any person feminine beauty – His vision. He taught me I ever heard in my life. She was always the ultimate secret to lasting, spectacular gentle and kind to the Indians, as she was to beauty. And it was far beyond the most everyone else. She took an interest in every amazing fairy tale I’d ever imagined, even as one at the mission, especially the children. a little girl twirling around my backyard. Everyone loved her, because to see her was to love her.”

~

Women who exuded enchanting beauty can be found all throughout the pages of Christian history. They rejected the empty feminine charm of the world, and embraced an altogether different kind of beauty – the beauty of Jesus Christ. They showcased femininity as God intended it to be, in all its elegance, grace, nobility, and lasting loveliness. Here are just a handful of inspiring examples:

- Said of Narcissa Whitman, young married missionary to Native American Indians “They say there is a young lady in New Haven who is beloved of that Great Being who made and rules the world. They say that He fills her mind with exceeding sweet delight, and that she hardly cares for anything except to meditate on Him. . . She possesses a wonderful sweetness, calmness, and kindness to those around her. She will sometimes go about from place to place, singing sweetly. She seems to be always full of joy and pleasure, and no one knows exactly why. She loves to be alone, walking in the fields and groves, and seems to have Someone invisible always conversing with her.”

“A pretty woman, with lovely soft features, kind eyes and dark hair, she was never angry, never impatient, never resentful, she patiently wore away prejudices and hatred by her gentle, gracious presence and her blameless life. She had all the firmness of a man, and yet a more gentle and womanly woman it - Written of Sarah Edwards by Jonathan would be hard to find.” Edwards, her future husband - Said of Lottie Moon, young single missionary to China Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


Captivating femininity isn’t supposed to only be found in Jane Austen movies or Cinderella stories. Words like enthralling, enchanting, breathtaking, stunning, delightful, and noble should be the description of every set-apart, Christ-built young woman. It’s God’s perfect design for each of His royal daughters. Our desire to be a radiant princess didn’t originate with Walt Disney – it’s a desire placed within us by our Maker. He created us to shine with royal beauty; not to dazzle with a self-promoting allure, but to be a sparkling reflection of the stunning beauty of our King. And in order to discover the lost art of true beauty, we must look outside the hollow pattern of this world.

history; she gave up personal ambition and pursuits in order to rescue hundreds of endangered children in India with a devotion that is also a forgotten ideal among modern femininity. This dazzling blend of ladylike grace and selfless devotion is what marks a truly set-apart young woman.

When Christ overtakes a woman’s life and transforms her from the inside out, she becomes truly feminine – a picture of elegance, grace, and loveliness, blended with sacrificial and selfless devotion to her King. She becomes a true lady, carrying herself with poise and confidence, yet deflecting all attention away from herself and toward Jesus Christ. She is enchantingly mysterious, When my husband Eric was first attempting holding her inner life sacred and guarding her to put words to the kind of feminine beauty heart with quiet tenacity. that set-apart young women are called to, he Noble, breathtaking, captivating, and Christdescribed it as a blend between Audrey Hepburn dignity and Amy Carmichael centered femininity is truly a sight to behold. It’s a beauty that does not draw attention to selflessness. Audrey Hepburn has been the woman, but to Jesus Christ. It’s a called the epitome of elegance and grace. radiance that is not dependent upon age, Though her personal beliefs or Hollywood circumstance, or physical enhancements. career are not things I necessarily want to promote, she knew how to carry herself like a It’s a loveliness that flows from deep within – the refreshing beauty of heaven, flowing out true lady – an almost entirely lost concept of a life transformed by Jesus Christ. Even among women today. Amy Carmichael is Cinderella pales in comparison! * one of the most heroic women in Christian

T

How beautiful are the arms which have embraced Christ. . .the eyes which have gazed upon Christ, the lips which have spoken with Christ, the feet which have followed Christ. How beautiful are the hands which have worked the works of Christ, the feet which are treading in His footsteps have gone about doing good, the lips which have spread abroad His name, the lives which have been counted loss for Him. Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.  

-Christina Rosetti, 1880

No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


take it deeper

The Lost Art of True Beauty

Order Now!

In today’s sex-obsessed society, pop culture’s idea of feminine beauty seems to be all about looking like the hottest models, movie stars, or pop singers, but the end results are often tragic - overwhelming insecurity, eating disorders, and sexual promiscuity. This book presents a whole different vision for feminine loveliness as God intended it to be - the breathtaking radiance of a young woman who has been transformed by Christ from the inside out. This book offers lots of practical advice about how to:

๏ ๏ ๏ ๏

Showcase Christ’s beauty in the way you dress, act, and live Overcome insecurity and see yourself as God sees you Become attractive to the right kind of guy Build your femininity on God’s values instead of the world’s

The Lost Art of True Beauty will lead you on a life-changing journey to become a woman of feminine loveliness, inner radiance, and timeless grace! Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie."


GODLY

guy/girl

interaction

copyright 2010 The Church at Ellerslie, all rights reserved

28


A Warrior-Poet SPEAKS UP

Straightforward Advice from an anonymous Warrior-Poet-in-the-Making

There once was a warrior-poet who became incensed with the injustices of his day... He was outraged by the violations of honor and purity taking place within the state and Church. This man of God was so compelled to do something about it that he finally got up the nerve to take a stand he knew would incite the retaliation of the powerful men of his day. However, he also knew that it would inspire a generation languishing in doubt, confusion, and squalor. Thus, he took a piece of paper with 95 complaints against the “powers-that-be” and pounded it to the church door in Wuttenberg, Germany. His name was Martin Luther, and his stance for purity and justice was a costly one. However, we might possibly still be under the oppression of Papal dominance had not God inspired him to declare the world-altering

truths of the Word of God with a passion and without blushing! I, though just a warrior-poet-in-the-making, have a few complaints of my own that I’d like to level at a grotesque monster that has lingered far too long in the corridors of the Church. He is sort of like a giant, green, slimy, smelly, Sumo-wrestler shaped character. While no one is comfortable with him being around, we simply tolerate him, hoping he will go away and take his oozy trail of stench with him. Since no one else seems to be doing anything about ‘ole blubber boy, I guess it falls to me. I don’t have 95 theses to nail to a big wooden door, but I do have a few complaints against this odious slob that I

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


will post anywhere I can. The name of this UGGI has a sidekick known as “Goofball.” character is UGGI, and that stands for He laughs a lot, but he doesn’t laugh at cute “Unhealthy Guy/Girl Interaction.” things kids say, or a genuinely funny comment or situation. He laughs at OK, I am going to dive in with guns a-blazin’ crudeness, ridiculousness, obsceneness, and and I hope I deal a mortal wound to UGGI in anything off-color. Here’s the problem: when the process! Here’s my opinion on him: he we feed Goofball a bone, hoping he’ll quiet has absolutely no place in the life of a setdown, he actually gets louder. His jokes get apart girl or in the life of a warrior-poet. So, more carried away, off the wall, and out of even though you might squirm as you read control. We all know how it works. A guy says this, I am hopeful that after you read these something funny and all the girls laugh. complaints, UGGI finds your life inhospitable Without realizing that his first joke was a little to his sloppy mess. UGGI has a few off-color, he is egged on by the guffawing sidekicks that do his bidding, and I want to crowds and decides to try some bigger and unmask four of them for you. better antic of ridiculousness. Pretty soon, other guys are joining in and trying to play a game called “I can tell a better joke than you.” They proceed to play this game for the next three hours. All the while, the girls are hoping the jokesters will finally shut up.

sidekick #1

” l l a b f “ g oo Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


Here’s the solution: don’t laugh at Goofball. Don’t tell another joke in the hopes that it will be the final one. Leave the room if you have to, but don’t let the slog of goofiness create a drunkenness of laughter. I love to laugh, and probably laugh more than anyone else on the planet, but I refuse to laugh at crudeness or inappropriateness. As a result, my laughter always draws me closer to Christ! Why? Because I joyfully laugh at humor that is pure, noble, and holy in it’s bearing!

some girls don’t realize that Googly Eyes has been plastered on their face. When you stare at a Godly guy, it leaves him feeling uncomfortable and sort of creeped out -

” s e y e y l g g o “g

sidekick #2 Do you remember those little eyeball things that you would glue to stuff in grade school? Those always creeped me out, and they happen to look like another one of UGGI’s cronies. “Googly Eyes” stares and gawks a lot. We a s p i r i n g w a r r i o r- p o e t s a re v e r y conscious of where our eyes are looking. We don’t follow a girl across the room with our eyes. Our eyes are restrained from gawking at young women. Not all guys understand this, and not all girls realize how dangerous this is for them as well (which is something that irks me as a guy). A guy notices when a girl is watching him, and

especially when the same girl gazes in his direction all the time. So, here’s my advice to both guys and girls: guard your eyes and don’t let Googly Eyes plaster his plastic orbs upon your face. When in conversation, maintain eye contact, but not too long otherwise the other person will begin to feel a

guard your eyes Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


little uncomfortable. Also, be careful with how long your gaze lingers on certain individuals; you may think it is unnoticeable; however, the likelihood is that there are numerous people in the room that notice the tacky Googly Eyes on your face.

to a compromising location or situation. He hates oversight from Godly parents or leaders, and is always making excuses to get these two naive individuals alone. Now, just because you happen to be in a room alone with a guy doesn’t mean you’re sinning. However, a true warrior-poet will notice when he’s been left alone in a room with a girl, and (with gentility and politeness in tact) will make an exit as quickly and as courteously as possible. A man of God values his honor and a young woman’s dignity too much to This next sidekick of the villainous UGGI is carelessly give a place to accusation or quite possibly the most lethal and most likely suspicion. to cause massive breaches in your life and Get Alone may not have debauchery in mind lives of those around you. This guy lurks in when he isolates a guy and girl, but he may places of isolation. He is elusive, shadowy, be trying to bring about a false accusation and almost completely invisible. His name is which could sully their honor for a long time. I “Get Alone.” Here is his strategy: he tries to knew of a youth pastor who wasn’t guarded isolate a guy and a girl, and separate them and cautious. He spent time alone with one from the rest of the group. Then he endeavors to place them in a position where they can talk for hours on end; or if he gets really aggressive he’ll try to lead this couple

sidekick #3

“get alone”

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


“ m e g a p h on e ”

of his female students. She made an accusation against him, and though he made claims that he did nothing wrong or indecent, it was her word against his, and his ministry was forever undermined! A warrior-poet and a woman set-apart for God’s purposes will endeavor to never allow any cause for accusation against their honor. If you ever find yourself alone with a guy, leave as quickly as possible. Get Alone may tempt you to linger, and even strike up an innocent conversation, but in the eyes of those around you, and more importantly, in the eyes of our King, you are toying with dynamite. Don’t let Get Alone get away with such a ridiculous ploy. I’ve seen so-called Godly couples destroy their relationships and reputations by lingering too long in isolation. Further, as a girl, you may be placed in a situation where you are unable to leave. Remember that your honor is maintained first and foremost by the God of Heaven. He will defend and maintain your honor!

sidekick #4

glaringly obvious in everything she says and does. When someone lets Megaphone rule their life, she seems to go out of her way to make it clear which member of the opposite sex she’s most attracted to. Both guys and girls let Megaphone run free in their lives. If you get two of these folks together, watch out! You have got the makings of an incredibly distracting and ungodly relation-ship. They will always sit together, flirt incessantly, and parade their affections boisterously wherever they go. It is obvious that Googly Eyeballs has paid them a visit and they don’t seem to mind the fact that Get Alone is their constant companion.

Megaphone blasts to the world the things that should be kept secret, discrete, and Let me introduce you to one more of UGGI’s hidden. When a girl has an obvious attraction many accomplices. Her name is “Mega- to a warrior-poet, and she makes it patently phone.” She is a loudmouth. She is always evident, a warrior-poet will go to great Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


lengths to distance himself from her. He is *** not attracted to Megaphone tendencies. If a These are only a few of UGGI’s gang. There girl is always unruly, rambunctious, and trying are many more, and they are ferociously to get the attention, a warrior-poet will avoid opposed to the building of Christ-honoring her. friendships between godly guys and girls. When a guy lets Megaphone into his life, he They despise honor, nobility, gentility, and the will prowl around like wolf, obviously looking like. They would prefer to gratify sinful for “easy prey.” A set-apart girl must give pleasures which last for a moment, rather such a wolf no open door. She must not let than bask in the eternal joy of Christ-built him associate himself with her. Megaphone’s purity. You must not let UGGI anywhere near main agenda is to get people thinking and your life or interactions with members of the talking about anything other than Jesus. opposite sex. Here’s a rule to live by: live as if Therefore, she’ll make a girl overly and the whole world is watching your manner of flirtatiously loud; and she’ll make a normal life and that their decision to follow Jesus guy so clingy that he becomes more Christ is going to be based upon the purity obnoxious than a Sumo-wrestler in the and holiness of your lifestyle. True warriormiddle seat on an airplane. Do not let poets and set-apart girls live as if a Megaphone into your life. She wants to generation was watching them, and more distract you, and everyone around you, from importantly, they live to please a Holy God. * focusing on Jesus.

Live as if the whole world is watching your manner of life ANONYMOUS & on purpose. Girls, we’ve had some attempts to inquire about the identity of our male contributors to these anonymous "warrior-poet" articles. We keep the identity of our guy authors under-wraps and for a very good reason: a glimpse of a single warrior-poet is enough to send a single set-apart young lady into distraction. So, rather than reveal our “sources” for guy thoughts, we encourage you to keep your gaze set upon the Author of romance and not on the authors of these articles! Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


True set-apart girls live as if a generation was watching them, and more importantly, they live to please a holy God.

copyright 2010 The Church at Ellerslie, all rights reserved

35


take it deeper

God’s Gift to Women

Order Now!!

Inspire the guys in your life toward true masculinity Learn more about the pattern of warrior-poet manhood Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


Q&A with leslie

Q: A:

How do I tell a guy to back off without hurting his feelings?

A lot of young women ask me how they should respond to a guy who is pursuing them, but who they have no interest in. Whether it is an ungodly guy trying to get you to lower your standards, or a Christian guy enticing you to offer more of yourself than you feel is appropriate, your first concern should not be “protecting his feelings,” but rather, protecting the priceless treasure of your heart, emotions, and body. If you can politely send “back off” signals and he takes the hint, great.

But often something more forceful is needed, such as

saying clearly, “I have no interest in any kind of relationship with you” or “I don’t feel it would be healthy for us to cultivate a close friendship.” And if he still doesn’t back down, don’t hesitate to recruit the help of a “protector” such as a dad, older brother, or pastor. Too many young women are afraid to rise up with confidence and walk firmly in their commitments. The nurturing, caring side of them doesn’t like hurting people’s feelings, so they end up leaving a door open for a guy when it should be nicely but firmly shut in his face. Jesus was not primarily concerned with protecting people’s feelings, but with speaking the unadulterated Truth. He was not mealy-mouthed where correction was concerned. He even openly called people “whitewashed tombs” and “a brood of vipers” when the occasion called for it. (see Matthew 23.) Remember that a set-apart Proverbs 31 woman is mighty and valiant, not wimpy and waffling. Don’t hesitate to rise up in the strength of God in order to jealously protect the “hidden person of your heart,” no matter how much a guy’s pride might be dented in the process. Chances are it’s exactly what he needs. * Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


A Semester at Ellerslie wi! E"c and Leslie Ludy JOIN US IN COLORADO!

A MESSAGE FROM ERIC & LESLIE: The Ellerslie semester-long intensive training program combines powerful Biblical training with a set-apart, spiritually-rich environment, tailormade for cultivating intimacy with Christ and becoming equipped for world-impacting Christian service. It’s a life-changing experience designed to super-charge your

upcoming sessions:

2011 FALL:

October 8 - December 11

spiritual walk, ground you in a Gospel worldview, give you an unshakeable passion for God’s Word, and prepare you for a lifestyle of kingdom work. We would count it a privilege to

2012 Winter/Spring: February 11 - April 15

2012 Summer:

personally invest in your spiritual life through this program!

June 16 - August 19

a$ly at:

www.ellerslie.com

Copyright 2010 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


take it deeper

Order Now!!

Answering the Guy Questions is a powerful book that dives into some of the toughest relationship questions I get asked by young women. If you have ever been discouraged, disgusted, depressed, or even defeated by the state of modern guys, this book can infuse you with vision, hope, and a practical means of doing something about it! This book shows young women the significant role they play in helping guys discover true manhood as God intended it to be, in all of its glory, strength, nobility, and honor. The answers presented are extremely practical - tackling key areas such as guy/girl friendships, physical and emotional boundaries, modesty, flirting, and laying the foundation for a God-scripted love story.

A great book for small group

discussions - appropriate for younger teens, yet relevant for college-age and older.

Answering the Guy

Questions Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie.  All rights reserved.  

No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


Bel my soul’s

husband

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.  

No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


oved

By Annie Wesche

Photos by Lauren Torres Design by Marlene de Vente

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie.  All rights reserved.  

No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


oved come to H! garden and eat

A

fruits. As a b"de before her

nd, I yield to $ee

bout a year ago, I was out on a walk through a neighborhood

filled with families and couples with either their children or dogs in

% & veil 'at separates,tow. I walked past and waved with a smile upon my face, but

P"nce of Righte)sness.

d pa*ake of my

deep down a pang of longing and ache was increasing with each step. The waiting season for my future husband seemed like it

was reaching an unbearable length and I silently cried out, “Lord, I

what has been

would give anything to have a strong, tender, manly hand cradling mine on this walk. Where is he, Lord?”

or $y pleasure alon+From the time I was a little girl old enough to esteem the wonder

$y power, $y manly

and beauty of a fairy-tale romance I have waited in anticipation for

ake '!, my body,

my own unfolding love story, my day to walk down the aisle, and the pursuit of the greatest marriage of all time. Throughout the

intense years of growing up and having every hope of such a pure,

templ+ My joy ! in beautiful story threatened, I have held unwaveringly in faith that

what $) have

$) have given up

and I offer my life

ragrance unto $e+

God could and would script such a legendary romance. Yet with

the passing of years, it began to dawn on me that marriage wasn’t just a natural event that occurred conveniently after graduation or even in my early twenties. There was life to be lived right here and now, either spent pining and waiting for a husband or living a fulfilled life with my Savior each day.

-ed $y blood,

& blood wi'in my veins,

ffe"ng to $ee,

$) have given

flowing wi' milk and honey,

& aromas of $y holiness Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.  

No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


Let my Beloved come to H! gar

its pleasant fruits. As a b"d

#rong husband, I yie

my body. Li% & veil 'a

where is he, Lord?

enter dear P"nce of R

Enter in and pa

However small a thing it may seem to be, my Beloved Jesus’ response to me on that walk was matchless. It was an unexpected reply, but more real to me than the couples I had

set

fruits. Take w

apa* for $y plea

I yield to $y power,

walked passed. “Hold mine,” He whispered. “It’s here and always has been, waiting to be the strength, care, love, and presence that

comforts you, upholds you, rejoices in you, and guides you. Reach

#reng'. Make '

out and you’ll see that I am more real than you have ever known.”$y Holy templ+ M

giving back what

At this crossroad, I was either going to keep sighing and sitting in

hopes that my prince would soon come along, or live out what the

given m+ $) h

Lord was showing me increasingly in His Word. He said He was a very real presence. With Him was fullness of joy? There was safety under His own wings of protection? Being with Him is a fountain of Life? Everything I needed for life and Godliness was found in Him? His Love better than life itself?

$y life, and I

as a sweet fragrance u

A smile still comes to my face when I think about how I responded.

$) have -ed

and I offer & blood wi' My eyes closed as tears began to fill them up and a smile that reached clear to my soul graced my once downcast expression. He was there to be all that His Word promised.

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.  

free-will offe"n

my Solymo. $)

mea garden flowing wi' milk

scented wi' & aromas of $

No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


d come to H! garden and eat

its. As a b"de before My her companion, my protector, my comfort, my joy inexpressible,

, I yield to $ee

and the strong Bridegroom I had so longed to have at my side. At

& veil 'at separates,

nce of Righte)sness.

a*ake of my

hat has been

His heroic invitation to walk with Him hand-in-hand, I gently squeezed my hand closed around His, gripping by faith the nearness of my Groom. It was then that a wonderful and

altogether lovely joy filled up my heart as the walk with this very real Prince extended through the sunset.

That day took me deeper into experiencing Christ as my First Love. It was the smallest gesture of my grand King, but it might as well

$y pleasure alon+ have been a walk through palace gardens. Every day since then,

y power, $y manly

e '!, my body,

God gives me the same invitation to meet Him in reality as I go throughout each day - to rise with Him, start the day with Him,

follow His lead with each friendship in my life, share with Him every

mpl+ My joy ! in my heart in prayer, lean upon His power to live as He calls me to,

hat $) have

$) have given up I offer my life

thought, hear His words of guidance, love, and wisdom, pour out

and lay down upon my pillow with His strong, protective presence right there with me. I had spent hours envisioning the life I would have serving

alongside an earthly husband. We would be rescuing dying bodies and souls, taking loads of orphans into our family, and while He

rance unto $e+ preached the Gospel I would be praying fervently for the Holy Spirit

d $y blood,

to move upon lost hearts. And while those dreams still exist, they have taken a new place in my heart. Rather than taking up each

moment with waiting, they lie tucked away, joyfully and sacredly blood wi'in my veins,

"ng to $ee,

$) have given

kept for the proper time; and when an earthly man is given, every single one of those dreams will be possible with our Lord.

wing wi' milk and honey,

& aromas of $y holiness -

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


Let my Beloved come to H!

What now takes center stage is the fact that my soul’s Husband is its pleasant fruits. As a b the very One who has healing for those dying bodies and hope for

#rong husband, I

each perishing soul; He is the Father to every fatherless child, and

my body. Li% & veil

the Gospel itself living and active! At His bidding and enablement each day I can be His hands and feet. He’s already given me

grand adventures following Him to the orphans in Haiti, standing enter dear P"nce of

Enter in and

before officials in communist China, and seeing through His eyes a crippled leprous woman. And He has won my heart with His never failing presence, matchless love, and fulfillment of every promise I have believed Him for!

set

Dare I say it, I am now so completely captivated by the love of this

fruits. Take

apa* for $y pl

Heavenly Man, that I want no earthly man until it will only serve to I yield to $y powe

#reng'. Make

bring my First Love greater glory on this earth! And I know now

that my heavenly love story with Jesus Christ will be the greatest

gift I can one day give my future husband, as we will both continue$y Holy templ+ living fully for our King...together. *

giving back wh

He has won my heart.

given m+ $) $y life, and

as a sweet fragrance

$) have -e

and I offer & blood w

free-will offe

my Solymo. $

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.  

a garden flowing wi' m

scented wi' & aromas of $

No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


Set Apart Devotionals

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie.  All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


@

Available online!

- click here -

want weekly devotionals from leslie sent to your email inbox? Sign up to receive Leslie’s weekly devotional by RSS feed.

(39) Our True Prince In my book Authentic Beauty, I wrote about the time in my life when I finally discovered the fulfillment of all my romantic childhood hopes and longings; when I finally found the prince I had always dreamed of, and he carry me away to his castle to cherish me forever. Since many of my readers knew about my love story with Eric, they at first assumed that when I spoke of my “prince,” I was talking about him. But as I explained in Authentic Beauty: My true Prince is not Eric. My true Prince is Jesus Christ. Eric, with all his amazing qualities, could never meet the deepest needs inside my heart the way my true Prince has. If not for the tender love of my true Prince, my love story with Eric would not have even been possible. The romance of my love story with Eric is only a faded glimmer of the spectacular beauty of the love story I share with my Jesus Christ. In fact, my childhood longing to be loved and cherished by a tender knight that I could follow to the ends of the earth was placed in my heart by Him. Jesus Christ alone can fulfill that desperate longing... Click here to read the rest of this devotional.

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


s t e L e v o L o G t I “The discretion of a man makes him slow to anger, And his glory is to overlook a transgression.” (Proverbs Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.  

19:11)

No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


By Amy Meyers Photos by Given Photography Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie.  All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


e n Ja

Jane Bennet from the beloved

novel, Pride and Prejudice, is often in the shadow of her fiery sister, Elizabeth, but Jane has a strength of character and a way of relating to others unlike any of her sisters. Jane always thought the best of people; even if their intentions were truly bad, she chose to give them the benefit of the doubt and did not allow any offense to fluster or distress her. I have always admired this trait in Jane Bennet, and as I have grown in my relationship with Christ, He has shown me that this attribute is something He desires to build into each one of His daughters.

she chose to give them the benefit of the doubt and did not allow any offense to fluster or distress her.

Contrary to Jane, I have always tended to be more like Elizabeth - misreading people, taking things much too personally, and holding on to any offense received. My mom had a famous phrase which she used quite often in my growing up years - I think I heard it more than either of my siblings combined, because of my particular disposition. “Just let it roll off your back,” she would say after someone had offended or insulted me. I never liked that answer. How could I let it go? Didn’t my mom understand what that girl said to me? Why didn’t she stand up to defend me and tell me I was right to be feeling hurt and angry?

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


By the worldʼs standards, I would have every right...

The offenses I received did actually responses and reactions and choose to happen, and the pain was very real; the respond in love, letting the hurt just fall to other party was indeed at fault, they the ground. shouldn’t have used that tone or said Romans 12:18 says, “If it is possible, as those words or ignored me in that way, much as depends on you, live peaceably but God began to teach me the truth of with all men.” God made it very clear that my mom’s words. By the world’s He did not want me to worry about what standards, I would have every right to they did wrong, or what they needed to defend myself, retaliate with a harsh reply, change. Instead, He wanted me to focus or sulk and give the cold shoulder, but the on how I could live peaceably, how I could behavior of heaven is completely show His love to all, despite how I was opposite. God showed me that I could not treated. control the actions of someone else (especially by treating them in the same Our flesh (the part of us that is solely unkind manner as they had treated me), focused inward), thoroughly enjoys a good but, by His Spirit, I could govern my long sulk, and the opportunity to nurse a

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


s i n r h at t e p God revealed the places in my heart that were still clinging to a fleshly pattern, and began to reshape me after His pattern for handling conflict.

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie.  All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


wound administered by someone else but it cannot remain in the life of a believer. Through His loving searchlight, God revealed the places in my heart that were still clinging to a fleshly pattern, and began to reshape me after His pattern for handling conflict. As her family so often pointed out, Jane Bennet always assumed that people meant well in every interaction, rather than supposing them to be disingenuous, with the intention of insulting. I had to admit to God (and myself) that I had not always displayed such an attitude to those with whom I related on a daily basis. God wanted me to see Him when I looked at my friends and family, to see Christ at work in their lives, and not just their shortcomings and mistakes. I asked Him to give me His eyes to see people and His heart to receive their words and actions through the grid of His Word and Spirit, instead of presuming to think they had an ulterior motive or unspoken feeling they were trying to express. Close friends and family are the ones who have the greatest access to our hearts, and they therefore, are the ones most likely to thrill or crush us. While it was easy to apply this principle to the woman at the grocery store who brushed me off, or the mailman who didn’t return my warm, “Good Morning!” I found it Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


Itʼs about being a constant display of Christʼs love to all much more challenging to carry it over ground though, and irritation and friction into more intimate relations. While it is not between friends, caused by a grudge, can my first choice to be slighted by a stranger quickly inflate into petty arguments, at Wal-Mart, I do not find myself mortally unnecessary distance, and resentment. wounded by their sharp tongue. But when If lacking to let go of a little affront can my best friend answers my question with wreak so much havoc in a friendship, just harshness or does something insensitive, imagine what it could do in a marriage. it is all too easy to immediately become Once the “two become one flesh” God’s irritated and upset. pattern for their life together is one of unity Back in elementary school, getting my - heart, body, mind, and spirit. But a feelings hurt didn’t have too great of an marriage in which the partners hold onto effect upon my relationship with the every little sting from the other will be person who had offended me. One of us strained and tense when it ought to be would finally say they were upset by the harmonious and sweet. actions of the other, and after a quick The way to prepare to “just let it roll off of apology we were running off to play jump your back” in marriage and not allow rope together. Adult life is somewhat those tiny offenses to plant a seed of different than those days on the playresentment in your heart is to begin right

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


you encounter... now with those you live and interact with matter most, but rather it is about being a daily. Instead of immediately thinking, I constant display of Christ’s love to all you can’t believe she brought that up! when a encounter, both now, and in the future. friend publicly mentions something you When Christ, and a true desire for Him to told her in confidence, assume she has a be seen, is at the center of any reason. Perhaps another friend in the relationship, the inevitable result is group is going through something you harmony, unity, and pure Christ-like love don’t know about and would benefit from which always lets it go. hearing what you have gone through, or “Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and maybe she just didn’t realize you wanted it beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, to stay confidential. Practice having the humility, meekness, longsuffering; bearing “Jane Bennet attitude” and thinking the with one another, and forgiving one best of others, giving them the benefit of another, if anyone has a complaint against the doubt. another; even as Christ forgave you, so The foundation for a Christ-built marriage, you also must do. But above all these

e thnd. e

one that will stand the test of time, begins things put on love, which is the bond of right now. Start living a life of “letting go,” perfection.” (Colossians 3:12-14) * realizing that it’s not your hurt feelings that

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


setapartgirl GO TO:

www.setapartgirl.com/beinvolved

for updates, prayer needs, & practical ways to give.

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie.  All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


Want to be involved? (we’d love for you to)

Pray.

This ministry is built upon prayer and we want you to join with us. See our up-to-date prayer requests online!

Share.

Our generation is in need of the Gospel of Jesus Christ & His vision for all that femininity can be. So help us spread the word about setapartgirl!

Give.

Our ministry is a testimony of the provision of God - in its content, creative elements, and the finances needed to have such a publication. As we move towards going to print, there are many practical things that we will be needing. If you feel led to lend a hand in this way, go online to see a list of our practical needs!

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


Excellence EXCELLENCE THE

TEST

Exploring God’s Pattern for a Set-Apart Student

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


& By Tessa Hershberger & Amy Meyers Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie.  All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


A

fter hitting the snooze button three times, she finally drags herself out of bed fifteen minutes before she has to catch the bus. She throws on a pair of jeans and a hoodie, and wrestles her hair into a ponytail, grabbing a Pop-Tart as she dashes out the door. Five minutes before the bus pulls up to the school, she remembers last night’s math homework that she never finished. Following a two-minute search through her backpack, she pulls out a crumpled worksheet and halfheartedly attempts to complete the work that got interrupted the night before by a last minute youth group game night. Once she gets to school, she coasts through the day in a fog, drowsily going from class to class and barely catching the day’s assignments.

Meet Haggard. To some of us she’s a friendly acquaintance, to others she’s a regular companion, and to still others she is the first person we see every morning - staring back at us in the bathroom mirror. No matter how intimately connected we are with Haggard, we’ve become a bit too comfortable with her presence. For some reason, even those of us who are actively pursuing Christ can sometimes neglect to apply the Truth that has changed other areas of our lives to the classroom. This does not always reveal itself as a blatant disregard for all things “school,” but many times it is the result of having an apathetic and Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


careless approach to what we consider to be nothing more than an obligation to endure until our “real calling” begins. However, what does God say about the attitude we should have as students? Colossians 3:23 says, “And whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord and not to men.” God’s pattern is “heartily,” not haphazardly or half-heartedly, in whatever we do - that includes school. We would like to introduce you to the five people who have had the most influence on Haggard’s life, five people a setapart student ought to avoid if she is going to truly honor God in every area of her life. Even if you personally are not lacking in all five of these issues, most of us are sometimes less than diligent in one or more of them.

swindler THE SWINDLER.

We try to dilute it down to “glancing” or “getting help,” but the art of the Swindler boils down to one thing - cheating. Oftentimes, we think of a cheater as someone who writes the answers to every test on the back of their hand or the bottom of their shoe, but in actuality, subtle cheating is just as deceptive as overtly stealing another’s work. Whether it be looking in the back of the teacher’s book to “check” your answers, or using your high-tech calculator to do the work you were clearly told to do on your own, it’s all too easy to master the art of subtle cheating without even thinking about it. Even if it is not a regular habit, cheating should never be dismissed as

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


anything less than exactly what it is - sin. The entire nature of cheating is one of craftiness and secrecy, causing the cheater to become sly and act in the dark. As Christians we are called to be “children of the light” (see 1

Thess. 5:5) in every action of our daily lives. We must not let the Swindler deceive us with her soft whispers of, “It’s no big deal.” Sin is always a big deal.

3 Ways to Expel The Swindler: REMOVE YOURSELF. If working in groups (or amongst a beautiful stack of teacher books) tempts you to “get help,” be willing to work alone. GET ACCOUNTABILITY. Confess your struggle with cheating to your parents or another spiritual leader, and invite them to play a more active roll in your schooling and hold you accountable. DITCH THE PHONE. If your cell phone has become a lifeline during tests, leave it in your locker and rely instead on devoted study time and the most important learning tool - prayer.

THE SUSPENDER. You wouldn’t wait until Sunday morning to start planning your children’s church lesson or pick out the songs for the worship service; rather, we put time into those things because we value them and desire to do them with excellence. If our schoolwork is going to bear the same quality as other areas, we can’t make a habit of putting it off until the last minute. Not only that, but procrastination carries with it the mindset that “I’ll do that on my own time.” Such an attitude may well seem reasonable, but hidden behind it is the

selfish presumption that our time is ours to spend as we see fit. However, God owns every moment of our time; He has the right to dictate how it is used - and be assured that God is not going to regularly advise, “You don’t need to do that homework.” If God has called you to be a student for this season of your life, it is His desire for you to be an excellent student. Let us beware the Suspender’s wrong assumption that putting off schoolwork in exchange for more “spiritual” things is acceptable, and choose to invest our time as God leads. Now let’s get started on that research paper!

suspender

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.  

No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


3 Ways to Expel The Suspender: GET GOING. As soon as you are assigned a project (even if it’s due next month) get started right away and schedule specific times to complete the work, being diligent to stick to them. CUT THE CLUTTER. Ask God to reveal any activity in your schedule that is consistently stealing from homework time, and be willing to give it up. USE A PLANNER. Write down daily assignments to have a visual reminder of what needs to be done, and make sure each one is crossed off before you go to bed.

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


slacker THE SLACKER.

For the natural student, the temptation is often to only do what is needed to ensure a ticket to their college of choice and an honor roll bumper sticker for mom. For the not-sonatural student, the common thought process is, “Just pass the class.” However, doing our schoolwork “heartily” requires hard work and purposeful effort, whether school comes easily to us or not. Students who follow God’s pattern, putting their all into their work, are willing to challenge

themselves, not always taking the easy road. If the research assignment calls for three sources, the Slacker would never dream of citing five - nor would she dare write 750 words if the minimum requirement was 500. Whenever a group project is assigned, the Slacker sits back in a contented passivity, happy to just nod along and let the others make all the decisions (except her decided effort to take on the easiest task). We must not allow ourselves to be fooled by the appearance of our report cards - straight A Slackers do exist.

3 Ways to Expel The Slacker: CHOOSE THE CHALLENGE. Whether it be choosing the higher math or a research topic you’re not familiar with, make a purposeful effort to take on something that will stretch you. JUMP IN. Be active in class discussions and group work by contributing your opinion, raising your hand to give an answer, or asking a thought-provoking question. READ THE BOOK. Rather than turning to CliffsNotes or a summary from the internet, fully give yourself to the assignment - no cutting corners.

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


sluggard THE SLUGGARD.

Jim Elliot said, “Wherever you are, be all there.” However, when it comes to school, it is easy to go through the entire day being anywhere but there. The Sluggard may appear to be sitting in science class, but mentally she is either still at home in her pajamas, or already out with her friends. Even if we are not actually dozing in class, we are still being just as disrespectful to the teacher when we are distracted and unfocused - or finishing our homework for

the next class. Being sharp and attentive in class is simply one way of showing Christlike honor to those God has placed in authority over us. While there are practical things we should do to prevent our bodies from growing weary, the most vital means of remaining sharp the entire day is to begin our day in the secret place, allowing God to fill us with His joy, vitality, and fortitude. Let’s be watchful that the Sluggard’s haze does not overcome us, and fight back with the strength of God (and forgo the powdered sugar donut).

3 Ways to Expel The Sluggard: MAKE HEALTHY CHOICES. You may not always have the time to cook a perfectly balanced meal, but by keeping quick, nutritious options on hand such as whole food protein bars, fresh fruit, or mixed nuts, you will not have to resort to PopTarts or a sugary snack from the vending machine. SIT UP STRAIGHT. This simple shift of disposition not only honors your teachers, but also transforms your attitude toward the class and forces you to be more attentive. TAKE NOTES. Even if your teacher does not require it, or you’re the only one who takes the class seriously, writing things down will keep your mind in class - not to mention the positive Copyright 2011have The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   effect it may on your homework. No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


THE SLOB. There is a noticeable difference between a student who comes to school in her polka dot PJ pants and foam flip-flops and one who has taken the time to wash her hair and iron her shirt. Though clothing is never to become our primary focus, the way we present ourselves is a powerful way of communicating the value we place on the task at hand. In addition, when we make the effort to put ourselves together in the

morning, we are more likely to carry ourselves with a ladylike disposition that reflects the dignity of heaven and honors Christ. The Slob thinks nothing of joining the normal slipshod style on most high school and college campuses, regularly donning the “grunge look” and adopting a careless attitude in her overall manner. However, a woman truly working “unto the Lord” dresses in a way that gives no attention to the Slob’s bait toward the comfort of sweatpants, and enters the classroom with a poised attitude to match.

3 Ways to Expel The Slob: DARE TO BE DRESSY. Be willing to dress with feminine dignity, regardless of the casual wardrobe of your friends - it’s okay if you’re the only one who comes to school in a skirt. PREPARE AHEAD. If lack of time in the morning is a constant issue, be proactive and shower, pick out your clothes, and plan your morning routine, before going to bed. MAINTAIN A CHRIST-LIKE ATTITUDE. While dressing with dignity is important, the most valuable aspect of your presence is His presence, radiating through a joyful smile, a peaceful manner, and a genuine care for others.

Perhaps Haggard’s biggest mistake is that she failed to bring her commitment to the set-apart life into the classroom. But the pattern is clear in Scripture - there are no exceptions. When a life is fully yielded to

God, it will be evident in every area. Let us resolve to put off the ways of Haggard, tune out the voices of her mentors, and allow the perfect Mentor to tutor us in His perfect pattern for excellence! *

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


Excellence

ALLOW THE PERFECT MENTOR TO TUTOR YOU IN HIS PERFECT PATTERN FOR EXCELLENCE

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


OUR

STAFF &

INTERNS’

RECOMMENDED

GOOD

READS.


Leslie recommends: THE TYRANNY OF THE URGENT by Charles Hummel

This is a tiny little book; almost the size of a magazine article, so you can read it in just a few minutes. But it’s a book that I have returned to through the past ten years or so, time and time again. It takes a Biblical look at priorities and time-management, pointing to the life of Christ as our example. And for those of us prone to a Martha-like personality, it reminds us that when we value what truly matters, everything else in life falls into place. For anyone starting a new job, new schedule, new school year, or new season in life, this is a must-read!

Lauren recommends:

THE CROSS AND THE SWITCHBLADE by David Wilkerson

I just finished reading through this book again and was challenged and gripped afresh by the testimony of David Wilkerson’s early ministry years. In this book, Wilkerson recounts the story of how God led him, a simple country preacher, to minister to the gangs of Brooklyn. He was a man of courageous obedience and radical surrender with a fiery love for Jesus. The Lord used him to reach thousands of young people entrenched in drug addiction, gang lifestyles, and prostitution. My faith swelled as I read story after story proclaiming the supernatural victory that is found only through the blood of Jesus Christ and the work of the Holy Spirit. Truly, there is nothing too hard for the Lord!


Finishing the Father’s Work

a life free of self-preservation

By Tessa Hershberger Photos by Lauren Torres


“The temple of Solomon was absolutely surrendered to God when it was dedicated to Him. And each of us is a temple of God, in which God will dwell and work mightily on one condition: absolute surrender to Him. God claims it, God is worthy of it, and without it God cannot accomplish His blessed work in us.” - Andrew Murray

W

hen I was in Jr. High, I began to desire whatsoever to sleep on a straw mat

learn about overseas missions and the and eat rice, or were simply terrified at the great need for men and women to give up thought of leaving behind family, friends, the luxury and convenience of life in and all things familiar. America and pour out their lives for the lost and hurting. Something about the idea Often, these messages would include the of the foreign - language, food, customs, idea of denying self and the command for methods, lifestyle, clothing - stirred man to “take up his cross” and follow something in me; I wanted to go - Christ (see Matt. 16:24). A verse that anywhere! It was around that same time naturally followed was Matthew 16:25, in

that God began giving me a desire for my which Jesus tells His disciples: “For life to be uninhibited by the usual whosoever will save his life shall lose it: American pattern for comfortable living, and whosoever will lose his life for my sake which made the stereotypical simplified shall find it.” When it came to life in missionary life even more appealing.

America, I was ready and eager to lose it for the sake of Christ. I was even willing to

Over the next few years, the desire to live leave my family behind and depend on an exciting and adventurous life minister- God alone for finances. Surely, I could not ing overseas only increased. More times be found guilty of trying to “save” my life, than I can remember, I would find myself could I? sitting and listening to a speaker talk about the need for people to give up their So I thought. easy lives in America and obey God’s call Over time, God placed me in circumto move halfway across the world. Most of stance after circumstance in which He the time I was either thinking, Why gently but firmly revealed to me that wouldn’t anyone want to go? or, I wish although I was willing to “lose” my life by God would tell me to go right now! I had a moving to a foreign country with no hard time relating to the ones who had no running water, I was yet daily attempting


MY agenda MY reputation MY preferences & rights to throw myself a life raft in a hundred little ways that would somehow serve to preserve my agenda, my image, my relationships, my money, my comforts, and my preferences. He showed me specific thoughts, words, and actions that sprung from a hidden motive to protect and control so that my life would go just the way I wanted it: My agenda: Uninterrupted, please. My reputation: Let me be vindicated, understood, and liked. My preferences and rights: Cared for and defended. In other words, I often lived in a pursuit to safeguard the fleshly self, shielding it from anything that would threaten to mar the things it held so dear - time, money, reputation, comforts, preferences, the right opinion of others. When I had a particular agenda in mind for a certain amount of time, I would find myself thinking, How can I avoid running into soand-so in order to prevent an “interruption� to my schedule? If I did get interrupted by

I was daily attempting to throw myself a life raft in a hundred little ways...


I realized how much of my life was still in my hands, rather than the hands of my Father. “so-and-so,” I quickly became irritated and would speak with shortness.

were somehow explained to others, I would be misunderstood and others’ opinion of me would be marred.

Relationships with others was another area God brought into the

light. He would tell me to spend time with I love God-given opportunities to give to or befriend a specific person, and yet my and bless others, but personal finance flesh would protest: I know I’d be having was another area God pin-pointed. He more fun if I was with a different person. showed me a selfish tendency to either Or, Being with that group will not benefit pursue financial benefit from another (How my social status. can I get out of paying for this?) or make the extra effort to ensure I wasn’t paying As these situations arose in which I caught more than what I owed (Did we split the myself thinking such thoughts, I realized grocery bill exactly right?), lest my “right” how much of my life was still in my hands, to fair treatment and a secure bank rather than the hands of my Father. Rather account be violated.

than being wholly surrendered to the daily agenda of God and joyfully submitting to

Yet another area God revealed was the His moment-by-moment leading, my opinion of others. I have experienced obedience was hesitant and spotted with many situations in which I knew the questions and concerns that all came from choice God was asking me to make was the same root - What about…ME? the right and selfless thing to do, and yet all I could see was a threat. What if so- Right before Jesus‘ earthly mission came and-so interprets my actions the wrong to a close, He was on His knees before way? What if they don’t understand the His Father in prayer. In simple summary of reason behind my actions? What if they His life, He said, “I have glorified You on make a wrong assumption about me? If the earth. I have finished the work which only they knew why. If only they could see You have given Me to do.” (John 17:4) behind the scenes! I was constantly Because Jesus lived a life entirely free of paranoid that unless my actions or words self-preservation of any sort, He was able


to sum up His life with the words every needy crowd as soon as possible so I servant longs to speak in sincerity: I don’t get held up talking to someone right finished the work you gave me to do. The before dinnertime? Jesus was entirely free mission Jesus was sent to accomplish on to do the Father’s will and carry out earth was extremely difficult, testing every Heaven’s agenda because He had no inch of His humanity - and He only had protective grip upon His life. Conthree years of full-time ministry to carry it sequently, He had the joy of being able to out. How did He spend those three years? say, “I finished the work, Father!” He did not spend His days, hours, and moments worrying about His agenda, His When we attempt to protect our daily lives

reputation, His preferences and comforts, and live only according to our idea of what His rights, His time, or His money. Instead, poured-out surrender to Christ looks like, He was fully consumed in obeying His we will come to the end of the road and Father’s will, every moment of every day. only be able to say, “Father, I finished

He gave His body, mind, and soul entirely most of what You gave me to do. The rest over to the Father, to do whatever the I just had to tweak a bit to make sure Father was doing and to speak whatever people didn’t get offended or confused.” the Father was speaking: “…the Son can do nothing of Himself, but what He sees the Father do; for whatever He does, the Son also does in like manner.” (John 5:19b) “…I do not seek My own will but the will of the Father who sent Me.” (John 5:30b) “For I have come down from heaven, not to do My own will, but the will of Him who sent Me.” (John 6:38) Jesus did not go about His day thinking, I wonder what my disciples will think of Me if I say or do that? I wonder if the Pharisees will understand why I’m healing on the Sabbath? How can I slip out of this

O that we might dare to lose our lives, as faithful disciples who are utterly abandoned to God!


In her book Discipline: The Glad Surrender, Elisabeth Elliot says of Jesus’ givenness to the Father’s agenda: “He made no claim to have done what He wanted to do. The claim was that He had done what had been given Him.” How many times do we know full well what the Lord is asking of us, and yet look around with a sigh, wishing we could have someone else’s assignments, someone else’s status, someone else’s possessions, someone else’s burdens? How much time and energy do we waste brooding over the apparent cost of obedience? Oh, that we might dare to lose our lives, as faithful disciples who are utterly abandoned to God! Truly, much freedom awaits those who, when face to face with a dangerous threat to the flesh, can joyfully exclaim, “I shall finish the work He has given me to do” - and such work is not ours to choose. *


MOTHERING WITH DIGNITY

Creating a Stable Routine By Leslie Ludy

Copyright 2010 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellersli


PART TWO:

Every Night

b e f o re t u c k i n g the kiddos in bed, I sit down in the rocking chair in Avy and Harper’s room with a book in my lap. My girls know the routine; they drag their little white chairs across the room, grab their favorite stuffed animals, and sit down to listen as I read them one of their three favorite books: Green Eggs and Ham, Knuffle Bunny, or Click Clack Moo. (Any other books just don’t go over well, and I’m wondering how long this streak will continue – I’ve got all three memorized by now.) As soon as I get to the last page of the story, they immediately pull their chairs back to the little table in the center of the room, put their animals away, and Harper crawls into bed to wait while I rock with Avy and sing her favorite songs (Happy Birthday to Avy and the I Love You song from Barney) – and we sometimes throw in a game of pat-a-cake for good measure. Then Harper announces, “My turn!” and Avy goes into her crib while I go through the same rocking routine with her big sister. After Harper has heard her favorite tunes (The Cheetah Went Over the Mountain – it used to be The Bear Went Over the Mountain, but we made some adaptations – and Row, Row, Row Your

My girls know the routine... Copyright 2010 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie


(which is actually a pink blanket). Avy then gets tucked in with her fuzzy pink and green blankie and her prized binkie collection. It’s the exact same routine nearly every single evening. Any variance in our nighttime ritual causes all kinds of drama and distress. One thing I’ve learned over the past six years in mothering is that a consistent routine gives little ones a very strong sense of peace, order, and security, while a lack of routine breeds insecurity, instability, misbehavior, and emotional meltdowns.

...consistent routine gives little ones a very strong sense of peace, order, and security.

Boat) she climbs back into her bed as I pray for her, put two Kleenexes under her pillow (it has to be two, not one or three), and tuck her in next to Lambie and Purple Blanket

Elizabeth Elliot once wrote about about the peaceful ordered beauty of her childhood home-life. Her parents put a strong emphasis on having a daily routine that the entire family followed. Her mother made many personal sacrifices in order to create stability and security for her children: “The regularity of our schedule was one of the things we depended on, and though we did not know it at the time, it gave us a great security. Mother made it a rule to get meals on the table when we expected them to be there. Our little world could be counted on to stay the was it was; safe, structured and pretty much the same every day. Whenever we burst in the door [after school] there was Mother, and there was the hot soup. It was nice to smell the soup, and it was nice that Mother was always there for us. Always. When my father was asked to lead a tour to Palestine for two whole months, Mother would have

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie."


loved to go along. She didn’t. She stayed home with us. When he traveled to Europe on business, she stayed home. It never occurred to us that is might be any other way. Today someone would be sure to point out that she “owed it to herself” to go on a cruise, or that she had “no life of her own.” Nonsense, she would have replied – what do you call this? This is my life. Who’d ask for more? She never asked, and we were much the richer for it.” (The Shaping of a Christian Home, p. 77-78) I’ve been greatly impacted reading about Amy Carmichael’s ministry to the many temple children she rescued in India. Prior to the children coming, she’d lived in tents along the road, had a very unpredictable travel schedule, and “no certain dwelling place.” But when God brought young children under her care, everything changed. “There was no thought of staying in Dohnavur more than a year” she wrote, “but the children had begun to come. And

In their secure, stable environment the children flourished in the ways of God.

children cannot be carted about.” (Gold Cord, p. 55) So she settled down and built for the children a quiet haven amidst a perverse, chaotic culture. And in their secure, stable environment, the children flourished in the ways of God.

I’ve found that creating and protecting a daily routine initially requires many personal sacrifices....

Creating a stable daily routine for the family is primarily the responsibility of the mother. While the husband is the head and final authority in the home, the wife is called to be the “keeper of the home” (see Titus 2:5); the one who carefully watches over the ways of the household and governs the daily affairs, systems, and patterns in the home. (Prov. 31:27) In my own mothering, I’ve found that creating and protecting a daily routine initially requires many personal sacrifices – I can’t just spontaneously go shopping, jet off on a girl get-away weekend, or meet my

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie."


friends for coffee on the spur of the moment. intimacy, and focused, purposeful times But routine also protects those things that together as a family. It also protects the are most important in life: prayer, marriage dignity of motherhood. Instead of rushing around the house chaotically every morning or yelling at my kids to get them to bed every night, a routine provides calm stability even amidst the noise and clamor of four young children.

...but routine protects those things that are most important in life: prayer, marriage intimacy, and focused, purposeful times together as a family.

So we have regular bed-times, wakeup times, and meal-times. My kids know when it is “art-time,” “schooltime,” “play-time,” and “book-time.” They even have a 20 minute period of time right after breakfast which Hudson calls “round-up time” – when we “round up all the kids” to watch an educational video in the classroom. It’s adorable to see them sitting in their four little chairs, listening intently as they learn their colors, numbers, and letters. There are not a lot of “free for all” moments in our schedule. Our kids don’t wander around the house looking for ways to entertain themselves. Throughout each hour of the day, there are clearly defined activities for each member of the family - and that is the way they like it. Whenever we’ve had unusual seasons that require a deviation from our routine, they are far more fussy, whiny, and disobedient. Elisabeth Elliot wrote, “If everybody does that which is right in his own eyes there is no gathering together

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie."


for a civilized breakfast, let alone for a quiet time in the living room afterwards. The frantic rush to find Father’s briefcase, make school lunches, put on snow-pants and boots and get everybody out the door with the right lunch bags and schoolbooks, in time to be where they need to be, destroys peace for the rest of the day.” (The Shaping of a Christian Home, page 77)

Children thrive on routine; and so do mothers!

what comes next. Children thrive on routine; I’ve seen many mothers roll their eyes at the and so do mothers! seeming “rigidity” of routine – feeling that it Of course there are days when we do will remove the freedom and fun from life. spontaneous things with the family. And But as I’ve said, I have found the opposite to there are times when ministry life demands be true. Protecting our routine actually gives that we set aside our routine temporarily. me more freedom by allotting specific, But when we keep life fairly predictable for predictable times each day for my highest our children, there is peace, order, and priorities. I study, pray, and workout while dignity in our home. God’s Word says, my children are sleeping each morning. I work on ministry tasks while they rest each There is an appointed time for everything, after noon. Our family has regularly and there is a time for every event under scheduled mealtimes when we can relax and heaven. (Ecc. 3:1 NASB) enjoy being together. And during the day when I’m teaching, training, and discipling What simple yet profound advice for running my kids, they are far more enjoyable to be a household well. Truly, God’s ways are with when they have the security of knowing perfect. *

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie."


C ute St uf f

the ludy kids are “saying & doing”

HUDSON, age 6 He recently told me, "When I am 19 I'm gonna go the mission field and adopt a few kids even before I'm married.   Mommy, that means you will be a Grandma.   Do you want my kids to call you Grandma or Granny?"   Hmmm.   I'll have to give that some thought.

HARPER, age 4

She's been asking me a lot of questions about her health. The other day she

was getting over a cold and asked me, "Why do I have the sneezles?" and when her tummy was growling, she asked me, "Why is there a bumble bee in my tummy?"  When her foot fell asleep she wondered, "Why does my foot feel wiggly?"

KIPLING, age 2.5 When he wants to see a grasshopper, he says, "Go see a hopper-grass?" Whenever he starts playing with his little plastic animals, he gets a funny low voice and says, "Hi Guys!"   It seems to be the only phrase his animals ever speak.   He has taken to driving around a little plastic fire truck and delivering "cheese pizza" to Mommy and Daddy.   After we take the invisible pizza, he always holds out his little hand and says "gimme the money."   Very direct and to the point. Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie.  All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie."


Photo by Amelia Arnold

& s e l z e e “sn ” s h a j u l e l l Ha

AVONLEA, age 2 I was rocking her the other night and she looked up and told me, "I'm really four." I think she believes herself to be a four-year-old trapped inside a two-year-old's body.  She certainly acts like it.   Also, she has developed the habit of randomly saying "Hallelujah" when she's in her car seat riding around town.   It's always a good reminder to praise the Lord! Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie.  All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie."


the

beauty of true

hospitality Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie.  All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie."


! By Tessa Hershberger Copyright 2011 The Church & at Ellerslie. rights reserved.  Amy AllMeyers

No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie."


T

hroughout our young adult years, we both have experienced a plethora of different living situations, including dorm rooms, a spare room at a grandparent’s house, and a Thai home complete with an outdoor kitchen. After several years, God led us both to Windsor, CO, and we now share a quaint little “basement home” which boasts a lovely pink couch from the 40s. In each of those places, we have had to allow God to teach us more and more about the art of hospitality. Most of our “homes” have not been ideal for welcoming guests, whether they were too small or sorely lacking in privacy. While we did not always excel at this creative art, God has been faithful to grow us through each circumstance and reveal that those factors do not have to hinder us. Despite the typical mentality, there is a lot more to hospitality than where you are or what you have. It’s all too easy to dismiss the idea of using our personal living spaces as a place to meet a group when most of us live within a mile o f t h re e d i ff e re n t coffee shops - not to mention the fact that your only seating area consists of a futon (which also serves as your bed). Besides being convenient for everyone, going out requires no preparation and eliminates the responsibility of playing the hostess. However, Scripture makes it clear that one way we are to demonstrate Christ’s love to others is by

welcome

welcoming them into our homes and caring for their needs. First Peter 4:8-9 says, “And above all things have fervent charity among yourselves: for charity shall cover the multitude of sins. Use hospitality one to another without grudging.” (KJV) Many of us have a wrong perception of what it truly means to carry out this command and take the initiative to invite people over and pour into their lives. We tend to see it as something we will do when we finally get our complete set of Pfaltzgraff dinnerware, rather than the service required of every Christian regardless of where you hang your hat.

Two of our favorite women, Janet Runkles (Leslie Ludy’s mom) and Sandi McConnaughey (Dean of Women here at Ellerslie Tr a i n i n g ) h a v e a l s o encountered a variety of living situations over the years, and we asked them to share how God has shaped the way they actively live this out.

there is a lot more to hospitality than where you are or what you have...

When we interviewed Janet, she welcomed us into her beautiful, newly-built home and offered us a seat in her spacious living room. But she went on to tell us of her newlywed days when she and her husband lived in student housing and she had nothing material to aid her efforts of

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie."


showing hospitality to others - unless you Sandi expressed a similar viewpoint when count the hideous furniture provided by the discussing the recent season she and her school. She quickly learned that possessions husband spent living in a small dorm room: have little to do with hospitality: “I believe that, more than fixtures and décor, “It was just in me to be able to have people more than paint and pictures, it is the hearts over, so I was trying to decorate around this of the people in a place that bring out orange plastic couch. You just do what you fellowship and love, creating the special can to make it a place people would want to memories of a life-giving home. The role I come, and you don’t let not having a have always wanted my home to play is one beautiful place stop you from having people of love - a love for God and a love for all who over. Hospitality is all about relationship and entered it. Our home has always been full of people and it’s not about performance; it’s people of all kinds - staying, visiting, not about how nice everything is; it’s not transitioning, gathering, praying, playing, about any of those things. It really boils down eating, laughing, finding sanctuary - and we to relationship and making people feel have tried to cultivate this kind of living, valued. It has to be the outflow of a wanting to share the abundant gifts with relationship with Christ, in the way you treat which God has so consistently blessed us.” others and the way you prefer others and the Truly, the heart of hospitality flows out of the way you think of others more than yourself.” “fervent charity” 1 Peter exhorts us to demonstrate. No matter if we live in a hut or a mansion, the surroundings alone will not

possessions have little to do with hospitality

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


cause people to feel welcomed and at ease. H o w e v e r, t h e r e a r e simple ways to create a more warm and inviting environment without a fully equipped kitchen or a leather living room set. The same spirit of love that makes hospitality a joy, also delights in taking the time to add small and simple touches which will reflect the heart behind the act and make a world of difference in the overall tone of your home. Despite everything Janet has at her disposal now, this approach is still significant to her because she knows the true meaning of hospitality:

if you don’t have anything, sit down and give them your full attention.

winter, we had the opportunity to host a weekly study group. With our busy schedule (and student budget), it wasn’t

“Thinking of simple beauty is very important; it doesn’t have to be extravagant, it doesn’t have to be silver. You can get a little single vase with a single flower; it just changes things and makes a charming addition.” We both found this concept of simplicity to be true even when we still lived at home with our parents. While we weren’t hosting extravagant dinner parties, we found that something as simple as making a batch of cookies or a fresh pot of coffee for a friend is an easy way to let them know you put thought into your time together. Now that we have a more typical environment in which “playing the hostess” feels quite natural, the little things are still some of our favorite ways to bless those who come into our home. Last

practical for us to make an elaborate dessert every week, but we could do something to make our friends feel at home. The most obvious choice - with it being winter - was to have a hot drink waiting for everyone when they arrived. They didn’t have to ask or wait until we asked them if they wanted anything; it was already there, ready to greet them as soon as they walked through our door. It did not take us more than five minutes to set out

simple beauty

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.  

No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


mugs and spoons, and yet it made for a “Things don’t have to be perfect, but things much cozier atmosphere than if we had been should be clean and organized - and anybody sitting around a folding table with our plastic can do that.” water bottles. “If you haven’t had time to do anything, you Sandi also took great pleasure in practicing still just put all of that out of your mind, get this principle while she lived in the dorm your guest a glass of water or a cup of room, and shared a few small but special coffee, sit down in an intimate place and give ways she would cheerfully bless others: them your full attention.” “Always having a bowl of chocolates or Smarties on the coffee table, a hot water pot and a generous variety of tea available, and a ready supply of smiles, prayers, and hugs! Also, before a guest left our room, one of my favorite ways to bless them was to say, ‘May I pray for you before you go?’ What sweet times we shared!”

Sandi: “Be careful what you allow to come in and go out of your heart (and your mouth). More than anything else, it is your heart, creating a welcoming atmosphere that will be a blessing to many.”

“It is not ‘things’ that make a warm and welcoming home; it is the character of Christ When you are in a less than perfect living in the life of a saint that will bring the situation, the idea of hospitality can be blessings of Life and Love to those who daunting and perhaps impractical. However, visit.” being purposeful and prayerful changes hospitality from being a burden to a delightful “Let the peace of Christ rule in your home! opportunity to personally minister the love of Peacefulness implies cleanliness, orderliness, Christ to others. If we ask God to open our purposefulness, and contentment. Work on eyes and show us how to actually make this cultivating these qualities in your “home” a part of our lives, He will be faithful to teach space and it will reflect the hospitable and grow us in our individual circumstances - character and virtue of Christ.” * wherever we are.

A few more practicals… Janet: “Keep a few things on hand in the freezer or in the pantry that you can pull out if somebody comes unexpectedly, like cookies, ice cream, tea, or cheese and crackers.”

...more than anything else, it is your heart, creating a welcoming atmosphere.

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


simple beauty

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie.  All rights reserved.  

Janet Runkles treated our setapartgirl team to a lovely tea in her home. The afternoon held laughter, delicious treats, the joy of kindred friendship, and truly sweet meditation upon Jesus!

No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


a lovely table & a hospitable heart.

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie.  All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie.  All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie.  All rights reserved.  

Photos by Lauren Torres

No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie.  All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


Think this is fancy? If you don’t have your own set of fine china or even your grandmother’s hand-me-downs, get your friends involved and go on a hunt for your very own unique collection! Scour second-hand shops, mix and match - all for just dollars. You’ll have a set with personality and make sweet memories in the process.

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


Intimidated with putting on a full tea? Have each of your friends bring a unique treat or sandwich and their own special tea to share. Remember, it’s the heart that creates the atmosphere.

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


“And above all things have fervent charity among yourselves...” I Peter 4:8 (KJV)

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


stay connected with us through facebook & our mailing list Follow us on Facebook! And share setapartgirl with your friends!

Join our mailing list. Stay posted on our progress in taking setapartgirl to print! Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie.  All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


May 25-27, 2012 ! s u n Joi

setapartgirl

annual conference

Windsor, Colorado OR Host a Live Simulcast in your area!

VIEW the online brochure now!

Lily Among Thorns

womanhood that changes the world Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie.  All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie.  All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


NOTE FROM LESLIE: Rachel Cedras is a wonderful blessing to the Ellerslie world, and to my life personally!  She is in our home nearly everyday, tirelessly working with Hudson and Harper to teach them reading, writing, spelling, and more importantly - Biblical Truth.   And our children dearly love their study times with Miss Rachel!   In addition, she leads Kiddo Night at Ellerslie; a weekly gathering of children from the community where Ellerslie students pour love and Truth into their little lives.   Rachel also leads Kiddo Time each Sunday morning at the Ellerslie campus church.   Her sweet radiance and gentle spirit draw little ones in and lead them closer to Jesus.  I'm excited for you to get to know her!

Meet Rachel

common life SISTER OF THE

Q: Tell us a little about how you came to know Christ and choose a set-apart life for Him.

When I was about six, I came to the understanding that I needed God; I remember thinking I wanted what my older siblings and parents had. As I grew older, God became the focal point of my life. I naturally looked for the time of day when there would be the least amount of interruption so I could have a time of peace while I read my Bible and prayed. The more I came to know God, the more time I felt I needed to be with Him. Starting in my early teen years, I woke up at 5:00 in the morning and often went to bed before everyone else in my family. Many choices were simply an outflow of fellowship with

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


my LORD: keeping myself entirely pure until I was married; allowing God to lead when it was His timing; not dressing to attract the lustful gaze of men; not absorbing myself in godless entertainment and not hanging out with people that would only turn my focus away from God; loving my siblings; and listening to those who are older than me. A month and a half before my 16th birthday, I became very sick, with what I eventually found out was mononucleosis (mono). During this time, all of my perfectly good plans for my future were tossed out the window. When I was in that helpless state, not knowing what I was plaguing me, God’s presence was sweeter than I had ever known before. It was through that blessed trial God gained full control of every detail regarding my future. In that moment, even though I was so weak I didn’t want to move, I knew I could rest in the unlimited strength of His everlasting arms. By His grace, He gave me the faith to trust that His plans were far better than anything I could have desired. He then beckoned me to wait on Him. What He had in store for me was abundantly beyond all that I could ask, think, or imagine.

Q: What are some ways in which you cultivate your set-apart walk with Christ? Over this past year there have been four essential things that have enabled my walk with Jesus to blossom in holy fear, love, and adoration. I have found when I take time to bend myself before the Word of God, He is

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


more satisfying to my soul than food is to my stomach. I will read through and take notes on the same book of the Bible over and over as though I am looking for treasure. As I simply allow Him to speak, instead of quickly going through and fitting it into my understanding, I am always amazed at how it sinks deep within my heart and even changes my thought patterns without me striving to perform it in myself. Writing out key verses, quotes, incidents, and prayers helps me to process through things, enabling me to learn at a deeper level and not miss what my Lord is trying teach me. Looking back on what I have written always strengthens my faith when I see how God has clearly orchestrated every detail of my life, day in and day out. Instead of running to people first for friendship, I have found this to be a way I can pour my heart before God while receiving the affirmation, fulfillment, and encouragement we naturally desire. Learning to obey the simple command to love as Jesus loves, has brought a sweet depth of intimacy. I find I am wholly incapable of fulfilling His requirements until I come to depend on His ability alone. First, my heart must be set on Him, adoring Him and looking for His approval above all others. Then, there is an outflow of His love to show those He has placed around me, whether it is taking the time to read an edifying biography with someone; spending time at the nursing home; doing extra work around the house; writing a note of encouragement; praying for someone; looking for ways to praise God’s character in individuals around me; or thinking of ways to bless and show others they are cherished. Finally, I have yet to discover a way to gain the limitless person of Christ that does not involve dying to self. Subtle self-exaltation, selffulfillment, and self-protection drain the life of God from within me. If I allow them to have any place in my heart, delighting in my precious King quickly becomes sullied with the stain of self. The greater the manifestation of Christ, the greater the call to give up all; I can only follow my Lord when I deny myself and pick my cross. All true joy

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


comes when I am conformed more and more into His image.

Q: Have there been difficulties you have faced in choosing to walk differently than this world? One of the more challenging times for me personally was my high school graduation. Though I felt God highlighting desires in my heart (one of the main ones being teaching), I honestly had no idea how He was going to unfold them or what I was supposed to do next. Having no idea what God wanted me to do, when everyone was asking me what I was going to do, was quite humbling. Additionally, being homeschooled made all of this doubly awkward, since you become the center of attention as the only one graduating. Multiple conversations that evening went along the lines of, “I have a heart for…and I think that I might be doing…” Even though I was thinking, “I have no idea.” Yet through this night, God further affirmed my need to follow His way, instead of doing what this culture declares or what would make the most sense to me. Because Proverbs 3:5-6 was written on my diploma, two cards, and a journal I was given, at that time has been irrevocably imprinted upon the forefront of my mind. Overall, as I have come to see the reality of my Lord Jesus Christ, many of the common things of the world have become entirely foreign to me. With the way my life is structured, mindless entertainment or seeking the futile pursuits of the culture isn’t even a thought - the difficulty lies in giving up perfectly good things. If I am not on guard, it is easy to listen to the subtle deception that, “God delights to give His children pleasure,” instead of remembering my life is for God alone and anything but the fullness of Him is vanity.

Q: Tell us about your work with the little kiddos at Ellerslie.

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


God has blessed me with the incredible honor of being nanny and teacher to the Ludy kiddos, along with coordinating the children’s ministry here at Ellerslie. On Sunday mornings, the children come up front for a short lesson. It is so precious to see how, over the past couple of months, they have become quite comfortable with answering questions in front of everyone. On Tuesday nights we have Kiddo Night, where children from the church are able to come spend the evening with the students from the school. This has become so much more than just a fun time. We cherish the privilege of having two hours to teach and encourage them to allow Jesus to be Lord of everything, even at a young age. We have a fun time in the beginning, a special time during dinner, a blessed time of worship to our King, and an exciting drama, which is either a nearly word-for-word story from the Bible, an allegory illustrating a key principle, or a missionary biography. After that, we have a short teaching/discussion time which is split up by age. Then, for added reinforcement, we have verse memorization, an illustrative activity, and one last worship song to bring the focus to God alone. Often the teaching leads into a time of prayer, thanking and praising God, or asking Him to give us the grace to do as He has called, and the strength to walk in the same manner He walked.

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie.  All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


Q: How did God grip your heart for children and what is your specific passion in working with them? Working with children is something that God has truly hallmarked for me. On Sundays at my church back in New Hampshire, nearly every child would come over to me to say hello and give me a hug. They knew me because I had either babysat them, or cared for them while their parents went through the new believer’s class. It seems wherever I go and whatever I do, I somehow un-intentionally manage to collect children. Being entwined with the lives of so many young ones, I couldn’t diminish God’s growing passion in my heart for these young lives, even if I wanted to. My passion is for children, from a young age, to be awakened, transformed, trained, and empowered by the Truth of God. This is not just for suburbia USA, but for the abused, neglected, and hopeless children around the world. The one light in the midst darkest, most destitute areas of the world, is the Gospel of Christ. It has been stunning to see how, within two years of graduating high school, God is beginning to bring the desire He gave me to teach elementary-age children into an extraordinary reality.

Q: Do you have any favorite kiddo stories? My greatest delight is seeing children grasp the Gospel for themselves. As I was walking through the Gospel with one girl, she asked if it meant she should sell everything she had - this was without me ever mentioning the story of Jesus telling the rich young

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


man to sell all and follow Him. Often where we make things complicated, children have clear vision of reality. One Kiddo Night, as we taught how idols destroy our ability to connect with God and keep us from being a light for Him, one of the children I had especially been praying for was gripped with God’s conviction. As the children were praying for God to strengthen them to be a light for Him, instead of praying his usual, “Thank you, God, for this day,” he asked that all of the children there would know God. When one of the puppets started talking about how much she loved TV, he led the unanimous rebuking shout that TV was an idol. Instead of being distracted during worship, like he was at the beginning of the semester, he was completely lost in Jesus. Immediately after worship was finished, he went straight out to his car to spend time praying and being with Jesus. He had come to the realization that spending time playing with the other children was an idol for him since it was something that took his focus away from Jesus. He exemplified what it means to have a tender, humble, and obedient spirit. It is incredible what children can comprehend and walk out when they are given the opportunity and encouragement needed.

Q: For other woman who would like to have an impact on lives for Jesus, how would you encourage them to move forward with this and what are a few things you have learned about ministering to children along the way? First, I have never teach my own life. myself from understand.

found the most important thing to remember is, I can what I do not fully comprehended or have enacted in When something is perfectly clear to me, I cannot keep speaking and teaching it in a way that anyone can

Second, remember you are always being watched; the testimony of who God is in your life is clearly evident. Children especially learn by

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


watching. Third, give children (or anyone God has put in front of you) your full focus. Whenever you see a child, make it your goal to make him or her feel comfortable and cherished. Doing even simple things show your love for them goes a long way to. Give them your full attention; make eye contact, smile, and do something the love with them. Even simply pausing to ask how they are doing, if you are just seeing them in passing, shows that you genuinely care for them. Fourth, use every opportunity to talk about God His character, His nature, His commands, and His actions. Children have sinful souls that are in need of the full undiluted Gospel call to surrender all to Jesus, just like anyone else. Be very careful that you do not hold back any Truth of God simply because cultural Christianity might say they are too young to be able to understand. Last, but certainly not least: pray. What would happen if we truly believed God would work powerfully through our prayers? For Kiddo Night, I have group of students praying for the children throughout the duration of the evening, asking God to grip their hearts with the reality of His kingdom. Whenever you pray for someone, God will pour His love for them into your heart as you pray for His kingdom to come in their life. God will most assuredly demonstrate Himself to everyone around you through the way He calls you to live. *

s ’ l e h c a R f o w e a f > s g n i h t e t i favor

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


observing Go d’s creation, Revelation 19, autumn in N siblings :) ew Hampshi re, green sm oothies, extra dark ch ocolate, anyth ing elegant, giggles, hugs , misty morn ings, missionary b iographies, n ursing home visits, kiddo night a t Ellerslie, seeing God do exactly wh at I prayed for, discussing th eology with ch ildren

Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.  

No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


Adopt them in your heart. (be in on it.) Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie.  All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.


NOTE FROM LESLIE: The first time that Eric and I witnessed Mike and Christa Hahn leading an international children's choir performance, we were moved beyond words. Tears streamed down our faces as we observed the radiance of these precious little ones that had been rescued out of horrible circumstances and were now praising God, dancing and singing with genuine joy.   A His Little Feet concert is an experience like nothing else; you simply cannot leave the same after seeing these children up close.   The HLF 2011-2012 is now booking their tour:   if your church is interested in hosting this life-changing event, I encourage you to contact His Little Feet today!  It's a wonderful way to help awaken the American church to the cause of orphans around the world.

Reaching the Orphan.

(one of our partners!)

you can pray: Please pray for...

• the choir and international staff candidates in Ethiopia, Honduras, and India who are awaiting their travel visa clearance.

• the 2011-2012 His Little Feet International Children's Choir Tour & Life Training Academy. • the choir children's hearts and minds - to be touched and transformed in a deep and powerful way by through Jesus Christ.

you can bring them to your church: Tour Booking Help the children of His Little Feet and many more by brining them to your Churches, Christian School, or Conference! If you are interested, fill out a booking request online or contact Jeff Dillon at 866-252-3988 x706 or jeff@hislittlefeet.org.

to learn more: Visit WWW.HISLITTLEFEET.ORG Be watching their website for news on the arrival of the next group children! You can get to know each child and adopt them in your hearts. Each one has a name, dreams, and above all, a plan from their loving, mighty Heavenly Father! And weʼd also love for you to get to know this ministry that we at setapartgirl have partnered with (and absolutely love)! Copyright 2011 The Church at Ellerslie. All rights reserved.   No material from this website may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie."


take it deeper

Order Now!

Wrestling

Prayer

Wrestling Prayer is filled with practical ways to help you build a stronger prayer life. A lot of us feel defeated in our spiritual life. Many of us have tried praying without success, and our expectations of God diminished as a result. For much of my Christian journey, this was how I felt in my prayer life - frustrated and discouraged.

But over the past few years, I’ve learned some important things about

prayer that have revolutionized my spiritual walk. Prayer can’t be baked down into a stepby-step recipe or cookie-cutter formula, but there are some Biblical principles that, when applied to your personal prayer life, can revolutionize your experience with a God who hears and answers prayer. If you are feeling lackluster in your prayer life, don’t miss this challenging and inspiring book!

a passionate communion with God copyright 2010 The Church at Ellerslie, all rights reserved

114


Leslie’s Blog!

& Marriage mamahood

Moments from my life.

MOTHERHOOD: Modeling Truth to My Children As my kids get older, it’s getting harder and harder for me to take them to any public play area where I know they will interact with all sorts of children who come from all sorts of homes. Quite often in these environments, my kids are exposed to behavior that is the very opposite of the Godly Truth we are endeavoring to instill within them. The other day Hudson noticed a little boy who was being an obnoxious bully, taunting other kids and using profane language. He was very upset by what he saw, and on the way home asked me, “Why did that boy do those things?” I explained to him that most likely, the little boy had never been taught about Jesus or instructed in Godly behavior towards others. Though I didn’t say it out loud to Hudson, I also believe that most likely, this little boy was simply modeling the ungodly behavior he had observed in his parents and older siblings... CLICK HERE TO READ THE REST

go online to subscribe to Leslie’s blog copyright 2010 The Church at Ellerslie, all rights reserved

115


“God does not contradict Himself. It is true that [she] who seeks God, yet is unwilling to forsake [her] sins, will not find Him. But [she] who seeks God and forsakes sin will certainly find Him.� - Madame Guyon

inthenextissue Time Wasters: Overcoming Fear - Part Two Gaining freedom over fear forever Set-Apart Friendship Building Christ-centered relationships with other girls God-Written Love Stories Real-life romances scripted by the Heavenly Matchmaker Himself

Soli Deo Gloria

copyright 2010 The Church at Ellerslie, all rights reserved

116

setapartgirl SEPT/OCT 2011 issue  

Leslie Ludy's Online Magazine

setapartgirl SEPT/OCT 2011 issue  

Leslie Ludy's Online Magazine

Advertisement