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A Taste of What’s Inside: Business Editorials 8. Esola Systemas - How Air-Con works and the money you save 10. Fresco - Time for relocation 32. Deep Blue Pools - How to cool off this summer Maps 26-27. Alhaurin el Grande 36-37. Fuengirola 46-47. La Carihuela & Montemar 56-57. Benalmadena 64-65. Coin 76-77. Business Directory 75. Sentinella Print Shop

Food & Drink Guide 16. Cockles - Now at Portside, front line Fuengirola Port 20. Jungla - Swedish, European Cafe-Bar 24. Food For Thought - Sweet BBQ Chicken Kebabs

Property Guide 48-51. Rentals & Sales

August Features 12. Around The World - Ancient Egypt 28-29. Charities & Events - Mother, Baby & Toddler show comes to the coast 38. Jewellery Corner - The latest on fashion by Ann French 42. Rosie’s Patch - Sunflowers this summer 44. Amazing Animals - The ‘hopping’ Roo 52. Horoscopes - Is it your lucky month? 66. An Inspiration - Nelson Mandela

Puzzles & Jokes 68-70. Puzzles 72-73. Jokes Cover Picture: ‘Spades’ by Toni, TC Fotografia

16 metres below, and each day he has to go down to check the harvest.

Man digs 50ft hole to fish - in his kitchen A Chinese man has dug a 50ft hole inside his house to go fishing. Li Huiyan, of Chongqing, hired 30 villagers for six months to dig the hole in his kitchen to reach an underground river. The river had been over ground but had disappeared 30 years ago when the local authorities bombed part of a mountain to pave a road. Li explained: "The river used to have so many fish, and by simply putting a net there, hundreds of fish would be caught." After digging his pit down to the river, Li installed a fishing net across it and regularly hauls out fish, so far earning his family nearly ÂŁ2,000. "I sell the fish at a wholesale price of 24 yuan (ÂŁ2.15p) per kilo, but 36 yuan (ÂŁ3.20p) per kilo for retail," he said. Li built ladders from his kitchen to the river

Woman cured by lightning A Serbian woman has been cured of a deadly heart condition - when she was struck by lightning. Shocked doctors who'd been treating Nada Acimovich, 51, for arrhythmia discovered she had made a complete recovery. The condition is normally treated with mild electric shocks to reset the heart's rhythm. Mrs Acimovich was saved from death by her rubber soled shoes but the electric jolt put her heartbeat back to normal, say medics. "In the first place she's lucky to be alive because of the lightning strike, but she's now going to live for much longer too," explained one. 'Pool got my daughter pregnant' A Polish mum is suing an Egyptian hotel after claiming her daughter got pregnant using their mixed swimming pool. The bizarre claim surfaced as Magdalena Kwiatkowska demanded compensation after her 13-year-old daughter came back from the family holiday expecting a baby. Tourist authorities in Warsaw confirmed they had received the complaint which states that the girl conceived because of stray sperm in the pool. "The mother is adamant that her daughter didn't meet any boys while she was there and is determined to go ahead with the case," said one travel industry source. (well they do always tell you not to drink the water!)

If you are considering purchasing an air conditioning / heat pump system it’s worth having an understanding of how it works and the energy / money they save: Air source heat pumps are a type of heat pump which utilize outside air as a heat source to heat or cool. Air source heat pumps are more efficient than oil, gas, and electric heating in mild climates but they are less efficient than ground source heat pumps. Why? Ground source heat pumps receive energy from the ground which is warmer than the outside air in winter. What is a heat pump? The benefits of this system over conventional electric heating are obvious, the electrical input into the heat pump is only a quarter of the heating or cooling received in the room. For example for every kilowatt of electrical power used the heat pump produces 4 kilowatts of cooling or heating a 400% efficiency. Even the “most efficient” electrical heater will only deliver 90-95% heat for the power consumed. How Much do they Cost? We’ve all been to Carrefour etc and seen the £199 air conditioning units, why are they so cheap? Generally these machines are older technology, fixed speed compressors, use an older type of refrigerant gas and have much lower efficiencies around 2:1. Better than an electrical heater and OK if used occasionally. If however you plan to use your machine for cooling in summer and the bulk of your heating in winter it makes sense to invest in an up to date unit, Panasonic, Mitsubishi, Daiken are all manufacturers producing high efficiency A rated units. The latest inverter driven machines capable of varying compressor speed depending on the cooling heating load achieve power savings of 40% compared to fixed speed machines. A 3.5kw inverter running in cooling or heating in an average sized living room will cost less than a euro a day ( 10 hours) a huge saving when compared to a fixed speed machine or an electrical heater. To sum up, it really is worth investing in the latest technology, the money saved in running costs will quickly pay back the difference in initial outlay. For further information please contact Esola Systemas on 952 550 323 / 616 119 007

Fresco’s are proud to be in our 3rd year in business and would like to thank all our customers old and new for their continued support. For like many, recent months have been increasingly difficult and we have searched for solutions to be able to offer our customers the continued quality of service our customers have come to expect. Our main challenge was to keep our services up whilst our expenses down and a relocation proved the answer. So from last month we are now operating from the same premises as DIY Discounts. Our premises may have changed but it is business as usual and we continue to stock all your main British food produce and more! In fact, 80% of our stock has now been reduced in price including Frozen Foods by 20% and Greetings Cards by 10%. We also stock Hardbacks / New paperback Books as well as Ink cartridges from €2.50 and mail boxes are available from €58 per year. In these hard times we are pleased to be able to offer our customers quality service at even better prices! Located behind the Dunnes Store in La Trocha, Coin, the Poligono La Trocha has lots to offer and plenty of free parking. Fresco’s and DIY Discounts have NEW OFFERS EVERY WEEK and between the two shops you are sure to find some real bargains. And if the shopping wears you out, you can always try JK’s around the corner for a cold one! Tel: 952 454 629 Opening Times: Mon - Fri: 10 - 18.00 (no siesta) Sat: 10 - 15.00 / Sun: 11 - 14.00 Poligono La Trocha, Coin, see map pg57

years for women. Famous For: Over five thousand years of old history - The land of desert, mummies, pyramids and pharaohs. This month’s ‘Around The World’ takes us to Ancient Egypt. Population: 76 million Total Area: 1,002,450 km2 Location: North East Africa. Egypt is bordered by the Mediterranean Sea to the north, the Gaza Strip and Israel to the northeast, the Red Sea to the east, Sudan to the south and Libya to the west. Language: Egyptian Arabic. Currency: Egyptian Pound Capital: Cairo, population 6.8 million. The 4th most densely-populated city in the world.

Egypt is famous for its ancient civilization and some of the world's most famous monuments, including the Giza pyramid complex and its Great Sphinx. The southern city of Luxor contains numerous ancient artifacts, such as the Karnak Temple and the Valley of the Kings. Famous for Inventing: 365 day calendar and the 24-hour division of the day. Clocks, lock and keys, combs, scissors, makeup, sails, Ox-drawn plows. Egyptians created glass and faience objects.

Main Exports: Petroleum, cotton, farm produce, cotton clothing, and aluminum products.

Egyptians invented the art of painting on plaster. Even cement was first used by them.

Life Expectancy: 63 years for men and 62

Hieroglyphics as an early system of writing.

Famous Egyptians: Egypt's first recorded pharaoh, was Menes. Notable successor pharaohs included Cheops (Khufu) who built the Great Pyramid at Giza; Amenhotep IV and his queen, Nefertiti. Cleopatra. World firsts: Egyptian architect Imhotep, who lived almost 5,000 years ago, is the earliest scientist to be known by name today. The earliest known wine cellars have been discovered in Egypt. The first written international peace treaty was made between Ramses II of Egypt and Hattusili III of Hittite empire. World’s Biggest:The Great Pyramid of Giza is the only one of the Seven Wonders of the Ancient World that survives substantially intact. Built as a tomb for Fourth dynasty Egyptian King Khufu and constructed over a 20 year period concluding around 2560 BC.

The Great Pyramid was the tallest man-made structure in the world for over 3,800 years. The Nile is the world's longest river at 6,695 kilometres long. The Sahara is the largest hot desert, covering 9.1 million square kilometres. This is slightly smaller than the size of the United States, the world’s fourth largest country. The Sahara stretches from Mauritania to Egypt and Sudan. Interesting facts about Egypt: In ancient Egypt, women could participate in business, own land, represent themselves in court and even become doctors. Amazing but true: About 3000 years ago, most Egyptians died by the age of 30. The first mentioning of condom-like means used to practise safe sex is dated to Ancient Egypt, where they were made out of skins of various animals.

There are four types of marriages: monogamy, polygyny (polygamy), polyandry, and group marriage. Monogamy is one wife, one husband. Polygyny is one husband, several wives. Polyandry is one wife, several husbands. Group marriage is by far the rarest and has never been the prevailing form of marriage in any known society. Queen Isabella of Castile, who dispatched Christopher Columbus to find the Americas, boasted that she had only two baths in her life - at her birth and before she got married. Leonardo da Vinci could write with the one hand and draw with the other simultaneously. There are more than 600 million telephone lines today, yet almost half the world's population has never made a phone call. The British royal family changed their surname (last name) from Saxe-Coburg-Gotha to Windsor, the name of their castle, in 1917. Before writing 007 novels, Ian Fleming studied languages at Munich and Geneva universities, worked with Reuters in Moscow, and then became a banker and stockbroker. In the West the most popular male names are James and John. The most popular female name is Mary. The people killed most often during bank robberies are the robbers. The average four year-old child asks over four hundred questions a day. One gallon of used motor oil can ruin approximately one million gallons of fresh water.

Cockles, now at Portside, front line Fuengirola Port. Originally from London, the Cockles team has over 10 years experience running a successful sea food restaurant which you can now enjoy at Portside – front line at Fuengirola Port. Now in their second year on the Costa del Sol, Cockles English seafood restaurant has a reputation for serving high quality English seafood including jellied eels, cockles, whelks, English and New Zealand mussels,

winkles, peeled prawns, dressed crabs and loads more as well as their authentic pie, mash and liquer. All supplied direct from Billingsgate fish market. Enjoy your meal in their fully licensed restaurant or on the comfortable, covered terrace and soak up the relaxed atmosphere of the Marina. Alternatively, Cockles also offer a take-away service. Simply phone in your order and it will be freshly prepared for you to collect or order at the restaurant. Cockles are also now offering a wholesale seafood or pie, mash and liquer service which is available to all bars and restaurants. Contact Cockles direct on the number below for prices and details. Open Tuesday to Sunday from 11am to 6pm. Phone 672 028 226

After years spent sailing around the world from one idyllic country to another, Swedish couple Mike and Siw arrived in Spain and opened the Jungla Café Bar on Calle Troncon in Fuengirola. Serving an excellent variety of food from English breakfasts, burgers and baguettes, to panini’s, pasta’s, vegetarian meals and tasty Swedish dishes. Or try something a little different from their popular tapas menu. Challenging the recession with low prices, a selection of drinks for €1 include a small beer, glass of house wine, tea or coffee. Or for something a little stronger you really can’t beat a G & T for only €1.50 or the inviting Cocktail menu! Relax and enjoy the ambience of this cosy café bar that has a distinctive Caribbean feel.

You can find us close to the main Post Office in the centre of Fuengirola. See map on page 36. Phone: 693 589 685

Sweet BBQ Chicken Kebabs This month we give you some real BBQ beauties...

Ingredients: 450g boneless skinless chicken breasts, cut into 1-1/2-inch pieces 2 cups fresh pineapple chunks 1 red and green pepper, cut into 1-1/2-inch chunks 1/2 cup barbecue sauce 3 tbsp. orange juice concentrate Preparation time: 15 minutes Serves: 4 people

Method: Heat BBQ to a medium-high heat. Using 8 long skewers, thread chicken alternately onto skewers with pineapple and peppers to make 4 kebabs. Mix barbecue sauce and orange juice concentrate and brush kebabs lightly. Grill for about 10 minutes, turning and brushing occasionally with remaining sauce.


MOTHER, BABY & TODDLER SHOW COMES TO THE COAST We are delighted to announce the launch of a brand new event here on the Coast. Mother, Baby & Toddler is an exciting two-day event dedicated to expectant mums, and families with babies and toddlers. Taking place at the Palacio de Congresos, Estepona, on Friday 9th October and Saturday 10th October, the show offers a great day out with free seminars and workshops on baby health and nutrition, sleeping issues, baby and child development and more – all designed to help raise a healthy, happy and confident child. Visitors can attend free workshops and seminars, watch the maternity and toddler fashion shows with the latest in both practical and stylish maternity and children´s wear, have a luxury manicure or a relaxing massage on site and sample the latest products and services on offer for expectant mums, babies and toddlers. The show is designed to offer expectant mums, and young families living on the Coast with a one-stop-shop to find out everything you need to know about having a baby and raising a family on the Coast. From choosing where to have the baby, medical care and support, decorating the nursery, buying the essential equipment from prams and car seats to clothing and toys, through to finding out what activities are on offer – from baby swimming to places to go for a day out, singing and dancing classes, nurseries and schools, specialist clothing and footwear. With over 50 exhibitors, Mother, Baby & Toddler offers delegates a unique opportunity to come along and find out about all aspects of having a baby and raising a family on the Coast. A great fun day out, with lots to see and do for the whole family, why not book your tickets now at: Tickets cost €8 per day per family, but if you register in advance you can attend for FREE.

For more information, or to exhibit at the show: Call Lisa Campbell on 664 560 590 Visit the website: Email us at: Search for the Face of Mother, Baby & Toddler Mother, Baby & Toddler, in association with tc fotografia, are launching a search to find the three faces of Mother, Baby & Toddler. We are looking for a Mother, a baby and a toddler who each represent that special time. If you would like to take part, or would like to enter your baby or toddler, please contact Toni for a FREE screening at tc fotografia studios. All entries to be submitted prior to the event taking place, and winners will be announced at the show. Your prize will be a beautifully framed print of the winning photograph. For details, and to book your session call 952 865 509 Website:

Cool in the Shade A few short months ago it was too cold to use an unheated pool and now most pools are approaching 30 degrees and rising fast. As the water temperature approaches body heat there is less and less ‘refreshment value’ in taking a quick dip. The water will continue to get warmer for the next several weeks, so if you want some relief from high temperatures - act now. How can you cool down your swimming pool during extreme heat conditions? How can you get your swimming pool water back to a cool and refreshing temperature? While dumping large blocks of ice into the pool may seem like a great idea, the cost is prohibitive and the effect is temporary. There are other ways. The easiest and cheapest way to cool your pool is to install a fountain. There are many types available which can connect to your pool's return line (Jets line). By spraying the water into the air some of each droplet will evaporate, drawing heat out of the rest of the water and thereby cooling it down. This is the same method employed by the old water cooling towers you used to see on top of buildings. Simply angling the Jets upwards, so that they disturb the surface of the water more, increases evaporation and contributes toward cooling the pool. You will lose water to evaporation, but this is a small price to pay to increase the enjoyment of your pool. The increased use of the pool can actually save on water by reducing the number of cooling showers taken by the family, with a net result of saving on water. Leaving the pool

cover off overnight should reduce the temperature by a couple of degrees. Every couple of years it’s necessary to partially replace the water in the pool, to dilute Cyanuric Acid (Chlorine Stabiliser), sulphates and Total Dissolved Solids (TDS). A perfect time to do it is when the pool is too warm - because refilling with cold mains water will cool the whole pool down. Use some of the water that you will pump out of the pool to carry out an extra-long backwash of the sandfilter. Many modern Heat-pumps can cool a pool as well as heat it - and do so quickly and economically. Providing shade to part of the pool will also help to keep water temperatures from rising too much. By putting the shade over the steps of the pool, where the youngest children play, you will also be protecting the most vulnerable family members. Algae, bacteria and viruses find life a lot easier in warm water. In a pool, the chlorine is used up quicker when the water is warm, so test the water regularly and adjust the pH and Chlorine levels often - before you get a green pool. Thanks to all who have requested our Monthly Newsletter. If you would like to receive this free Newsletter, giving seasonal pool advice and tips, plus details of ‘Special Offers’ on chemicals and pool equipment, please send an email, with the word ‘SUBSCRIBE’ as the subject, to Copyright remains with Author - Ken Walker, Deep Blue Pools Tel: 952 499 059

Here are some of Jerry Seinfeld’s classic comedy stand up moments: I will never understand why they cook on TV. I can’t smell it. Can’t eat it. Can’t taste it. The end of the show they hold it up to the camera, “Well, here it is. You can’t have any. Thanks for watching. Goodbye.” Whenever you ask for a doggie bag at a restaurant, there’s a certain sense of failure, isn’t there? People always whisper it to the waiter, “Uh, excuse me. Can I get the doggie bag? I, uh couldn’t make it” It’s embarrassing, because the doggie bag means either you’re out on a restaurant when you’re not hungry, or you’ve chosen the stupidest possible way there is to get dog food. How about the doggie bag on a date? There’s a good move. Let me tell you, if you’re a guy and you ask for the doggie bag on a date, you might as well just have them wrap up your genitals too. You’re not going to be needing them for a while, either. The problem with the mall parking is that everything looks the same. They put up different colors, different numbers, different letters but what they need to do is name the levels like, “Your mother’s a whore.” You would remember that. You would go, “No, we’re not. We’re in ‘My father’s an abusive alcoholic’.” On my block, a lot of people walk their dogs and I always see them walking along with their little poop bags. This, to me, is the lowest activity in human life. Following a dog with a little pooper scooper. Waiting for him to go so you can walk down the street with it in your bag. If aliens are watching this through telescopes, they’re going to think the dogs are the leaders of the planet. If you see two life forms, one of them is making a poop, the other one’s carrying it for him, who would you assume is in charge? I swear, I have absolutely no idea what

women are thinking. I don’t get it, OK? I, I, I admit, I, I’m not getting the signals. I am not getting it! Women, they’re so subtle, their little.. everything they do is subtle.. men are not subtle, we are obvious. Women know what men want, men know what men want, what do we want? We want women, that’s it! It’s the only thing we know for sure, it really is: we want women. How do we get them? Oh, we don’t know ’bout that, we don’t know. The next step after that we have no idea. This is why you see men honking car-horns, yelling from construction sites. These are the best ideas we’ve had so far.. The car-horn-honk, is that a beauty? Have you seen men doing this? What is this? The man is in the car, the woman walks by the front of the car, he honks. This man is out of ideas. The amazing thing is, that we still get women, don’t we. Men, I mean, men are with women. You see men with women. How are men getting women, many people wonder. Let me tell you a little bit about our organization. Where ever women are, we have a man working on the situation right now. Now, he may not be our best man, OK, we have a lot of areas to cover, but someone from our staff is on the scene. That’s why, I think, men get frustrated, when we see women reading articles, like: “Where to meet men?”. We’re here, we are everywhere. We’re honking our horns to serve you better. You know I think that if you’ve had a relationship with someone and you try to become friends afterwards, it’s very difficult. It’s hard. Because, you know each other so well, you know all of each others tricks. It’s like two magicians, trying to entertain each other. The one goes, “Look, a rabbit.” The other goes, “So? I believe this is your card.” “Look, why don’t we just saw each other in half and call it a night?, Okay?” Why is commitment such a big problem for a man? I think that, for some reason, when a man is driving down that freeway of love, the woman he’s involved with is like an exit. But he doesn’t want to get out, he wants to keep driving. And the woman is like, “Look, gas, food, lodging, that’s our exit, that’s everything we need to be happy, get out, here, now!” But the man is focusing on the sign underneath. It says, “Next exit, twenty-seven miles.” And he thinks, “I can make it!”

by Ann French of Welcome to the first “Jewellery Corner” column where each month I will highlight the fashion trends and hopefully give you some tips on wearing the right jewellery for you. The jewellery we wear is often influenced by the clothes we wear and 2009 has seen deeper and bolder colours like reds, greens, violet, browns, navy, terracotta, blacks and greys in the shops. The trend for jewellery is big and bold and “Fake means Fabulous” but this doesn´t mean that delicate is out! The trend for floral creations and interpretations of the floral theme will continue along with pearls, fusions of metals, rhinestones, glass and other beaded designs. To add inspiration to your wardrobe complement it with vibrant, colourful jewellery via long beaded necklaces, bright bracelets and casual style earrings. Wear single stranded necklaces choker style, tightly wrapped around your neck or hung loosely to the front. With all these deep and bold colours and oversized jewellery as the trend, try not to go overboard. A few tips: When wearing large bangles or necklaces try to avoid adding delicate jewellery as well. Big and bold jewellery should be the focal point of your outfit so try to stick to solid colours, simple clothes rather than frills or prints. Choose a body part to focus on. If you choose earrings as your focal piece of jewellery, leave your neck bare. If you choose your neck load it with necklaces but wear small earrings such as studs or pearls. For hands: don't do bracelets and rings at the same time. Wear the right length. A necklace that falls just below the collarbone complements a plunging neckline. A necklace that falls below the bust goes with a high neckline. Chokers look great with strapless dresses. See you next month….. Ann

August, long hot days, not an ideal month for gardening in Spain, so fix those alarms for an early start. Lilies and gladioli should now have finished flowering so cut back all greenery to encourage healthy flowering for next year. Keep cutting annuals like Zinnias to prolong flowering and cut sunflowers and hang to dry for winter colour. Lantanas berried ends need to be cut off before they drop and squash on terraces and paths. Trim climbers to keep them neat and under control and cut out water shoots on Bougainvilleas. Check that no plants show signs of completely drying out, watering is required to replace moisture lost by evaporation, to cool the earth and support the cellular growth of strong healthy plants. Water needs not only to reach shallow roots but more importantly to the larger and deeper tap roots. Many plants will survive drought for a long time but they will rarely become the best plants in the garden. Watering can be time consuming and expensive so take note of the following requirements. Ensure all new plants are planted in Autumn and not later than March, keep pots and containers in the semi shade rather than full sun. Water non flowering plants to just keep them alive in August, huge amounts of water wont bring them back to flower until a drop of temperature's in September and October. Don't water mature plants unnecessary. Install an automatic time controlled watering system with an adjustable drip feed to each plant needing water.

Sunflowers can be excellent fun to grow. Given the right conditions they can grow quickly and provide excellent height and

flower and are considered easy to grow and

are often considered to be a good plant for children. However, to get the best out of sunflowers requires a few careful points. Proper Staking. Preventing sunflowers from falling over is one of the great challenges of growing them. Individually, you need a strong cane well dug into the soil. If you grow sunflowers in blocks it will be easier to provide staking for the group; they will give each other support as they grow. Feeding. Sunflowers enjoy a rich well fed soil. If going for height, use a nitrogen based fertiliser, switching to potash (tomato food) as the buds begin to appear. Watering. Sunflowers don’t like drying out and they can soon start to wither. Make sure they are well watered; each watering should aim to reach its roots, rather than just touching the surface. Starting in pots. To get the best start for sunflowers sow 2cm deep just covering with soil and place in a 3 inch pot. When big enough you can plant out, hardening off if necessary. Best Location. Sunflowers like a sunny position and preferably not too windy.

Til next month....


A great Aussie icon – The Kangaroo is this month’s Amazing Animal. The Red Kangaroo is the world’s largest living marsupial and are native to Australia. The red kangaroo can grow to 2 meters (6.5 feet) tall and weigh as much as 90 kg (200 lb). They can travel at speeds of up to 70 km/h (44 mph). A kangaroo can jump up to 10 feet (3 meters) high with a run-up and have a leap length of up to 26 feet (8 meters). Kangaroo’s have a life span of about 12 to 18 years. Unlike other four legged mammals, kangaroos cannot walk backwards. A newborn kangaroo weighs approximately 0.03 ounces and is small enough to fit in a teaspoon. The “Joey” finds its way into the female pouch and remains there for about 265 days. Kangaroos can slow down the development of a foetus if the conditions are unfavourable. This phenomenon is known as embryonic diapause. There are more kangaroos in Australia than humans. This is mostly due to the clearing of bush lands for pasture and increased availability of surface water since European settlement. To get up close to a ‘Roo’, you can move forward while they aren't looking and freeze while they are - movement is what will scare them away; but if you stand still, they see you as being part of the landscape. Kangaroos do "box".

CAPRICORN - Finances are looking up and you feel secure and confident on this level. A stormy relationship causes great tension and could effect the way you feel about your domestic situation. Nip things in the bud before they escalate out of control and you will be happier. By 12th a sense of balance is felt and you will know the path you need to tread. Concentrate on tasks as they occur and get them out of the way so that you can enjoy some free time with those you love.

AQUARIUS - Hot air and bravado leads to arguments with those close to you, or those that are in close proximity. This is brought on by the things that you have taken for granted being subject to change - this can make you see ‘red’. Relationships become the focus of the month as they have taken a serious turn of late. A struggle is over so don’t waste any more energy fighting – the road to freedom, independence and inspiration lay ahead. PISCES - Be careful not to fall for the charms of sweet talkers who are not exactly putting their money where their mouth is. This is a month of hard work for you in many areas of your life as you are so busy with things to organise and arrange. Money does seem to equal a sense of freedom for you right now and that may be a focus of attention. Watch your diet and health routine as you find it easy to put yourself last when an increase of activity occurs. ARIES - Temperatures are set to soar this August and clashes with your nearest and dearest are perhaps inevitable. Sizzling love also accompanies this aspect and you will feel the need to be able to express your passionate side. Towards the end of the month success seems to come easily to you as you transform all that energy into productivity, just make sure you eat and exercise to prevent burnout. The month is likely to end on a high note when an important project comes together.

TAURUS - The month begins in a focused way and your methodical approach will pay off when it comes to convincing lawyers, accountants or banks of your status. There is light at the end of the tunnel and someone enters your life that will make you feel ‘lighter’ than you have done in a while. By the end of August you could take risks and behave in a manner most unexpected, this is fuelled by fireworks and steamy nights. However it appears - you have played your cards seriously. GEMINI - This is a month for saving and being frugal and even though you may wish to join in the frivolity, for you, future security is more tempting. Scattered information finally comes together to give you an overall picture that finally makes some sense. You can use this information now to put a plan into progress and help someone close out of a sticky situation. A flirtation is likely around the 20th when someone catches your eye.

CANCER - You are feeling full of life and vitality at the moment and bright ideas abound, even though you could find yourself frustrated, as movement on one level seems slow. Keeping calm towards a situation that you want resolved is the key. Heart to heart talks are highlighted and by the end of August a solution will be found, one that will placate all parties. Watch the pennies though, try to economise where possible, you may need them for a rainy day.

LEO - Charm is your second name this August and smooth talk seems to just roll off the tongue. Anyone you take a shine to will be blinded by your gift of the gab. There is no shortage of attention this month and you will delight in basking in the glow of admirers. There could be foreign travel highlighted or a love affair with someone from another continent – perhaps a holiday romance. Patience is required in one area of your life and getting all hot and bothered about it won’t help anyone.

VIRGO - There is a lot going on for you right now and strong undercurrents in your domestic situation will make you feel a little on edge. You seem caught in the middle of another’s drama and the characters are behaving oddly. Try not to pre-empt how you will react to a scenario just go with the flow and let it be. Within this a whole new set of possibilities open themselves up to you, and with your razor sharp intellect, no doubt you will make the best of the situation.

LIBRA - Taking the plunge with that special someone will ignite you into life. Your

confidence is at an all time high and it is time to make the most of each opportunity that crosses your path. Expect to be seeing more of the world, friends and business acquaintances – you have come through a tough time of late and now it is time to reap some rewards. A friend from the past could get in touch and you will be thrilled to catch up.

SCORPIO - Your feelings for someone increase and an even more powerful connection is made whether you are in a relationship with them or not as yet. When you set your sights on an ideal partner there is no stopping you and you are quite a force to be reckoned with. If you feel like taking a huge financial risk then be cautious and check the paperwork twice if not more, be sure that you don’t overlook important details. Life certainly has an element of depth to it now. SAGITTARIUS - Ego clashes with another are likely, this is because you know what you want and you know how to get it, the problem is another close to you thinks exactly the same. Compromise is the key here both of you will have to take a step back and re=evaluate the situation. Indulging your passion for travel is ideal right now and will re-charge your batteries. The underdog may cause a stirring of your emotions mid August and you will feel compelled to help.

WATER 1. 75% of Americans are chronically dehydrated. (Likely applies to half the world population) 2. In 37% of people, the thirst mechanism is so weak that it is mistaken for hunger. 3. Even MILD dehydration will slow down one's metabolism as 3%. 4. One glass of water will shut down midnight hunger pangs for almost 100% of the dieters studied in a University of Washington study. 5. Lack of water, the # 1 trigger of daytime fatigue. 6. Preliminary research indicates that 8-10 glasses of water a day could significantly ease back and joint pain for up to 80% of sufferers. 7. A mere 2% drop in body water can trigger fuzzy short-term memory, trouble with basic math, and difficulty focusing on the computer screen or on a printed page.

in Coke removes stains from vitreous china. 4. To remove rust spots from chrome car bumpers: Rub the bumper with a rumpled-up piece of aluminium foil dipped in Coca-Cola. 5. To clean corrosion from car battery terminals: Pour a can of Coca-Cola over the terminals to bubble away the corrosion. 6. To loosen a rusted bolt: Apply a cloth soaked in Coca-Cola to the rusted bolt for several minutes. 7. To bake a moist ham: Empty a can of Coca-Cola into the baking pan, wrap the ham in aluminium foil, and bake. Thirty minutes before ham is finished, remove the foil, allowing the drippings to mix with the Coke for sumptuous brown gravy. 8. To remove grease from clothes: Empty a can of Coke into the load of greasy clothes, add detergent, and run through a regular cycle. The Coca-Cola will help loosen grease stains. It will also clean road haze from your windshield.

8. Drinking 5 glasses of water daily decreases the risk of colon cancer by 45%, plus it can slash the risk of breast cancer by 79%., and one is 50% less likely to develop bladder cancer. Are you drinking the amount of water you should drink every day?

FOR YOUR INFORMATION: 1. The active ingredient in Coke is phosphoric acid. It will dissolve a nail in about four days. Phosphoric acid also leaches calcium from bones and is a major contributor to the rising increase of osteoporosis.

COKE (even Diet) 1. In many states the highway patrol carries two gallons of Coke in the trunk to remove blood from the highway after a car accident.

2. To carry Coca-Cola syrup! (the concentrate) the commercial trucks must use a hazardous Material place cards reserved for highly corrosive materials.

2. You can put a T-bone steak in a bowl of Coke and it will be gone in two days.

3. The distributors of Coke have been using it to clean engines of the trucks for about 20 years! Now the question is, would you like a glass of water? or Coke?

3. To clean a toilet: Pour a can of Coca-Cola into the toilet bowl and let the 'real thing' sit for one hour, then flush clean. The citric acid

Sent in by William McNamee

Honoring those who improve the species... by accidentally removing themselves from it! Payback (27 December 2008, Serbia) 23-year-old Strahinja Raseta was wanted by Croatian police for murder, as well as for a spectacular robbery of a central post office. He fled to Serbia to evade the law. But even bad guys have friends. Raseta had a friend, and his friend had lent him E15,000. Some loans can never be repaid. This was such a loan. Finding himself unable to earn or steal the funds needed to reimburse his friend, Raseta attempted to end the matter in another way--by murdering the lender! He crawled under his creditor's Jeep and planted an explosive. However, the muffler was still hot, and the heat set off the explosive while Raseta was beneath the vehicle. He died in hospital the next day in the Serbian capital city of Belgrade, illustrating the truth of the Shakespearean adage, "Neither a borrower nor a lender be." Whac-A-Mole (10 January 2007, Germany) A 63-year-old man's extraordinary effort to eradicate moles from his property resulted in a victory for the moles. The man pounded several metal rods into the ground and connected them - not to household current, which would have been bad enough--but to a high-voltage power line, intending to render the subterranean realm uninhabitable. Incidentally, the maneuver electrified the very ground on which he stood. He was found dead some time later, at his holiday property on the Baltic Sea. Police had to trip the main circuit breaker before venturing onto the property. The precise date of the sexagenarian's demise could not be ascertained, but the electric bill may provide a clue. Elephants Press Back (2007, India) Increased mining and recent rains in southeast India have unsettled the wildife. In the past few months, migrating elephants

have killed eleven people in southeast India. A team of four journalists decided to interview this herd of rogue elephants. They went into the forest in search of the rogues - on foot. Elephants are big, and elephants are fast. As the recent deaths illustrate, a person can't out-run an elephant. But these intrepid journalists apparently assumed that a press pass grants immunity. With a nose for news, the journalists sniffed out the herd. Once located, it was only natural to capture the photogenic animals on film. Unfortunately, the elephants were camera shy. Angered by the flash, the irritated herd charged the paparazzi, miraculously killing only one of the four. His remains could not be retrieved. The Alchemist (10 December 2007, Russia) As a child, Sergei promised his grandmother, "I will establish for you the elixir of immortality! I want you to live forever." As an adult, we find Sergei sitting in his college biology class, licking potassium cyanide off his palm. He had found that magic elixir. He swallowed poisons daily, to strengthen his body and protect him from death. He regularly consumed small quantities of toxic mushrooms, arsenic, and cyanide salts, and urged others to join him. During daring night-time excursions, Sergei often said, "I shall not die. I have swallowed poison for years, and today, nothing can kill me." After swallowing the cyanide, he began to feel ill, and asked his classmates to fetch some water. But instead of drinking plain water, he dissolved the rest of the cyanide powder in it, and consumed the solution. Sergei was an intelligent student, interested in chemistry and anatomy. He earned a gold medal, and was accepted into two universities, the Medical Academy and the Ural State University. But Sergei's scientific premise was flawed. Instead of immortality, he had discovered the elixir of mortality. He went into convulsions, slipped into a coma, and died without regaining consciousness. His father praised Sergei as a gifted chemist who died for the sake of science.

Nelson Rolihlahla Mandela, born 18 July 1918 in Transkei, South Africa, is a former President of South Africa, the first to be elected in a fully representative democratic election, who held office from 1994–99. Before his presidency, Mandela was an anti-apartheid activist, and the leader of the African National Congress's armed wing Umkhonto we Sizwe. The South African courts convicted him on charges of sabotage, as well as other crimes committed while he led the movement against apartheid. In accordance with his conviction, Mandela served 27 years in prison, spending many of these years on Robben Island. Mandela’s Story After the 1948 election victory of the Afrikaner-dominated National Party, which supported the apartheid policy of racial segregation, Mandela began actively participating in politics. Mahatma Gandhi influenced Mandela's approach, and subsequently the methods of succeeding generations of South African anti-apartheid activists. Initially committed to non-violent resistance, Mandela and 150 others were arrested on 5 December 1956 and charged with treason. The marathon Treason Trial of 1956–1961 followed, with all defendants receiving acquittals. In 1961, Mandela became leader of the ANC's armed wing, Umkhonto we Sizwe (translated Spear of the Nation), which he co-founded. He coordinated sabotage campaigns against military and government targets, making plans for a possible guerrilla war if the sabotage failed to end apartheid. Mandela described the move to armed struggle as a last resort. On 5 August 1962 Mandela was arrested after living on the run for seventeen months. The arrest was made possible because the U.S. CIA tipped off the security police as to Mandela's whereabouts and disguise. On 25 October 1962, Mandela was sentenced to five years in prison. Two years later on 11 June 1964, a verdict had been reached concerning his previous engagement in the African National Congress (ANC). Mandela was sentenced to life imprisonment on 12 June 1964, the charges included involvement

in planning armed action, in particular four charges of sabotage, which Mandela admitted to, and a conspiracy to help other countries invade South Africa, which Mandela denied. While in jail, his reputation grew and he became widely known as the most significant black leader in South Africa. In February 1985 President P.W. Botha offered Mandela conditional release in return for renouncing armed struggle. Mandela indeed spurned the offer, releasing a statement via his daughter Zindzi saying, "What freedom am I being offered while the organisation of the people remains banned? Only free men can negotiate. A prisoner cannot enter into contracts." Throughout Mandela's imprisonment, local and international pressure mounted on the South African government to release him, under the resounding slogan Free Nelson Mandela! In 1989, South Africa reached a crossroads when Botha suffered a stroke and was replaced as president by Frederik Willem de Klerk. De Klerk announced Mandela's release in February 1990, the event was broadcast live all over the world. Mandela returned to the leadership of the ANC and, between 1990 and 1994, led the party in the multi-party negotiations that led to the country's first multi-racial elections. Mandela's leadership through the negotiations, as well as his relationship with President F.W. de Klerk, was recognised when they were jointly awarded the Nobel Peace Prize in 1993. South Africa's first multi-racial elections in which full enfranchisement was granted were held on 27 April 1994. The ANC won 62% of the votes in the election, and Mandela, as leader of the ANC, was inaugurated on 10 May 1994 as the country's first black President. As President from May 1994 until June 1999, Mandela presided over the transition from minority rule and apartheid, winning international respect for his advocacy of national and international reconciliation. After his retirement as President in 1999, Mandela went on to become an advocate for a variety of social and human rights organisations. Mandela is a vocal supporter of SOS Children's Villages, the world's largest organisation dedicated to raising orphaned and abandoned children. Mandela has received more than one hundred awards over four decades, most notably the Nobel Peace Prize.

“For to be free is not merely to cast off one's chains, but to live in a way that respects and enhances the freedom of others� - Mandela.

1. What is the longest highway in the world? 2. Which country is also known as "Country of Copper" 3. Where is the coldest place on the earth? 4. Which island is the largest in the Mediterranean sea? 5. Which capital city stands on the river Danube? 6. The biggest island of the world is? 7. Which city was once called the `Forbidden City'? 8. What country is called the Land of Rising Sun? 9. The Gurkhas are the original inhabitants of which country? 10. The earlier name of New York city was? 11. What country is also known as the land of the midnight sun? 12. The place known as the Roof of the world is? 13. In which sport do players take long and short corners? 14. How many legs do butterflies have? 15. Which country’s National Anthem has only music but no words? 16. In what year did Elvis Presley die? 17. Which British city has the most canals? 18. Which city has the most Rolls Royce's per capita? 19. What is the height of a cricket stump (in inches or cm)? 20. Which 2 countries have hosted the football world cup twice? 21. What is the main ingredient of a Molotov cocktail? 22. What type of creature is a Bombay Duck? 23. In Scrabble, how many points does the letter ‘W’ score? 24. Which mountain range runs through Columbia, Peru, Venezuela and Argentina? 25. Which actor played the voice of Darth Vader? 26. Which is the largest city in New Zealand?

Answers on page 78

How many faces can you see in the tree?

1. Can you think of a word that changes both number and gender when you add the letter 'S'? 2. What word in the English language uses all five vowels plus Y in alphabetical order and uses each one only once? 3. Whoever makes it, tells it not. Whoever takes it, knows it not. Whoever knows it, wants it not. What is it?

Answers on page 78

ACROSS 1 Church council (5) 4 Thing of value (5) 7 Misery (3) 9 Merited (6) 11 Young sheep (4) 12 Question word (3) 13 Regret (7) 15 Bounded (7) 18 Leave-taking word (3) 19 Dig up (4) 20 Exert (6) 23 Beverage (3) 24 Fad (5) 25 Pitchers (5)

DOWN 1 Gain insight (3,3,5) 2 Possess (3) 3 Female deer (3) 5 Step (5) 6 Indoor sport (5,6) 8 Margin (4) 10 Column (3) 13 Decay (3) 14 Insane (3) 16 Rodent (5) 17 Compass point (4) 18 Snake (3) 21 Golf peg (3) 22 Uncooked (3) Answers on page 78

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z Discover how to break a code: Every number in the codeword grid is 'code' for a letter of the alphabet. Thus the number '2' may correspond to the letter 'L', for instance. We have given you the first letter, 1 = D

Queenslanders An elderly man in Queensland had owned a large property for several years. He had a dam in the next paddock, fixed up with nice picnic tables, horseshoe courts, and some mango and avocado trees. The dam was properly shaped and fixed up for swimming when it was built. One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the dam, as he hadn't been there for a while, to look it over. He grabbed a five gallon bucket to bring back some fruit. As he neared the dam, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee. As he came closer he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny-dipping in his dam. He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end. One of the women shouted to him, "We're not coming out until you leave!"

The old man frowned, "I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim naked or make you get out of the dam naked. Holding the bucket up he said, "I'm here to feed the crocodile." Sent in by William McNamee Bull-tastic! My wife and I went to the Balmoral Show and one of the First exhibits we stopped at was the breeding bulls. We went up to the first pen and there was a sign attached that said, ' THIS BULL MATED 50 TIMES LAST YEAR’ My wife playfully nudged me in the ribs ....Smiled and said, 'He mated 50 times last year.' We walked to the second pen which had a sign attached that said, ''THIS BULL MATED 150 TIMES LAST YEAR' My wife gave me a healthy jab and said,

WOW, That's more than twice a week! ..........You could learn a lot from him.' We walked to the third pen and it had a sign attached that said, in capital letters, 'THIS BULL MATED 365 TIMES LAST YEAR' My wife was so excited that her elbow nearly broke my ribs, and said, 'That's once a day ..You could REALLY learn something from this one.' I looked at her and said, 'Go over and ask him if it was with the same old cow.' My condition has been upgraded from critical to stable and I should eventually make a full recovery. Sent in by Sandra Crombie

Happy Couple! To My Dear Wife, You will surely understand that I have certain needs that you, being 54 years old, can no longer satisfy. I am very happy with you and I value you as a good wife. Therefore, after reading this letter, I hope that you will not wrongly interpret the fact that I will be spending the evening with my 18 year old

secretary at the Comfort Inn Hotel. Please don’t be upset – I shall be home before midnight. From your loving husband. When the man came home late that night, he found the following letter on the dining room table: My Dear Husband, I received your letter and thank you for your honesty about my being 54 years old. I would like to take this opportunity to remind you that you are also 54 years old. As you know, I am a math teacher at our local college. I would like to inform you that while you read this, I will be at the Hotel Fiesta with Michael, one of my students, who is also the assistant tennis coach. He is young, virile, and like your secretary, is 18 years old. As a successful businessman who has an excellent knowledge of Math, you will understand that we are in the same situation, although with one small difference: 18 goes into 54 a lot more times than 54 goes into 18!!! Therefore, I will not be home until sometime tomorrow. From your loving wife.

ACCOMMODATION 50,000 Cheap Hotels Online.

BED & BREAKFAST Casa 65 B&B, Heart of Andalucia. Weekend Breaks (Fri/Sat/Sun Nights) 120€ Includes Sunday Lunch Midweek Break (Mon/Tue/Wed/Thur) 120€ Prices or Per Room For 2. Tel: 953 570 089

BUILDER General Building Reforms:

Security, Equestrian, Commercial & Domestic Fencing, Perimeter & Swimming Pool Alarms, Groundworks, Painting, Blockwork, Carports, Guttering & Drainage Services

Tel: 617 172 583 / 617 148 311


CAR GUIDE Now available the 'import your own car guide' 69 euros. With this guide you will be able to re-register your own car yourself. No Gestor fees. No import duty to pay. For full details visit or call Chris on 606 554 048

CAR HIRE Rent a car 3000, delivery to & from airport / accommodation free of charge, Tel: 952 490 692, 639 682 081 Website: Email:

ELECTRICIANS 16th Edition BS7671 qualified, Apprentice trained, 21 years experience. Rewires, extra sockets, lights, fault finding etc. Pay as you go electric meters supplied and fitted, ideal for holiday lets, aircon etc.

Ian: 650 151 569 FURNITURE Aquabeds, Tel: 952 112 563, 636 648 173 Email: Seconds R Us, Second Hand Furniture, Parque recinto ferial 7 (Feria Ground) Alhaurin el Grande. Tel: 952 112 563

HEALTH & BEAUTY Inner Yoga - Classes, meditation, retreats, therapies, healing. Alhaurín de la Torre. Tel: 952 649 266 / Mov: 663 179 518 Clinica Salca, Home & surgey visits. Travel & residence Insurance accepted. Edif. Agata, Avda. Gamonal, 2, Arroyo de la Miel, Benalmadena Telf: 95 256 25 95 / 95 256 04 33 EMERGENCY CALL 24hr 619 059 500

INTERNET SERVICES Riosat SL, No landline required. Internet and telephone services. Some areas free installation. Covering Andalucia. Call 951 239 310 / 626 679 018

DRAIN SERVICES Euro drain services, cctv surveys, drain jetting, septic tanks, soakaway installations fast and efective. 24hr blocked drain clearance. Call Darren 629 640 754 all areas.

KIDDIE HIRE Buggies, car seats, travel cots, highchairs and more from as little as €1 per day. Based in Alhaurin el Grande. Can deliver. Tel: 600 609 129.

PLASTERER / BUILDER Specialist in ceilings, walls and floors. 25 Years experience. For price and advice, call Frank at Casabermeja. Tel: 618 597 364 Or Email:

VAN HIRE Man with Van & Trailer. € 20 p/h No job too small, Local & International. Call Dave 665 034 005 or 695 888 870

VETERINARY SURGEONS BRITISH VETERINARY SURGEON Home visits at no extra cost . First and second opinion work, vaccines, Id chip, blood analysis etc. Consultations in the comfort of your own home. Tel: 652 302 985 Mr Wayne Hockenhull BVMS MRCVS

WEB DESIGN Web Design Malaga - Get your business a website from just € 150. Plus 6 months free web hosting. For details call Simon on 653 437 416

BOX IT IN FOR ONLY 95€ (12 ISSUES) All our advertisers are placed on our Online Business Directory

EMERGENCY NUMBERS Emergency Ambulance Fire Brigade Local Police National Police Guardia Civil Helpline in English

112 061 080 092 091 062 902 102 112

HOSPITALS Carlos Haya Hospital Civil Hospital Maternity Hospital Costa del Sol Hospital Hospital Clinico Univ

951 030 100 951 030 300 951 030 200 952 102 112 952 649 400

MALAGA AIRPORT Information 952 048 771/952 048 484 Arrivals T2 952 048 844 Arrivals T1 952 048 845 Departures 952 048 804

TAXI Alhaurin de la Torre Alhaurin el Grande Benalmadena Coin Fuengirola Malaga Torremolinos

952 410 444 952 491 010 952 441 545 952 453 587 952 471 000 952 327 950 952 380 600

MARKETS DAYS Tuesday - Antequera, Fuengirola. Wednesday - Alhaurin de la Torre, Arroyo de la Miel, Saydo Hotel Mollina, La Cala de Mijas. Thursday - Alora Country Farmers Market (Los Caballos), Alhaurin el Grande - Feria, Pizarra, Torremolinos - Feria Ground. Friday - Arroyo de la Miel, Cartama Country Farmers Market, Mijas Costa. Saturday - Benalmadena - Los Porches, Coin, Fuengirola, La Cala de Mijas. Sunday - Benagalbon, Coin La Trocha, Estacion de Cartama, Fuengirola, Malaga next to the Stadium, Pizarra Car Boot, Torremolinos by Crocodile Park.

Get Quizzical: 1.Trans-Canada 2.Zambia 3.Verkoyansk in Siberia 4.Sicily 5.Belgrade 6.Greenland 7.Peking 8.Japan 9.Nepal 10.New Amsterdam 11.Norway 12.Tibet 13.Hockey

14.6 legs and 2 pairs of wings 15.Bahrain 16.1977 17.Birmingham 18.Hong Kong 19.28 inches (71.1 cm) 20.Italy and Mexico 21.Petrol (Gasoline) 22.Fish 23.4 points 24.The Andes 25.James Earl Jones 26.Auckland

Brain Benders: 10 Faces Brain Teasers: Shop til you drop

Shrinking Violets

Top Hat

Up for grabs

Riddle: 1.Princes to Princess 2.Facetiously 3.Counterfeit money Codeword: 1=D, 2=P, 3=C, 4=N, 5=O, 6=T, 7=R, 8=S, 9=L, 10=E, 11=A, 12=M, 13=H, 14=Y, 15=W, 16=K, 17=I, 18=B, 19=G, 20=U

The Sentinella Malaga: August '09  

The Sentinella Malaga is a free publication in Spain, Malaga province, serving the English speaking expat community. Its light-hearted appro...

The Sentinella Malaga: August '09  

The Sentinella Malaga is a free publication in Spain, Malaga province, serving the English speaking expat community. Its light-hearted appro...