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Triple ooops


Editorial

Dear participants of the 17th National Selection Conference of EYP Switzerland in Romanshorn, We have reached the last day of the session. Please put your seats back into an upright position and make sure your tray tables are stowed away. Fasten your seatbelts once more, turn off all electronic devices and enjoy the farewell issue. Find out more about our lovely Head Organiser Julia, Monty Python, and your future in EYP. You will also find an article dedicated to your very own committee. Our work in the Media Team goes far beyond the fun we had. All the sleepless nights we spent editing the issues, the radio shows and the video were primarily for you. We wanted to provide you with something to take back home. Show the newspapers to your friends and family who are probably still wondering what you were up to the past few days. Have your new friends sign them or use them as inspiration if you ever want to become an EYP journalist. They are the only non-virtual memory, so we advise you to treasure them. As the Closing Ceremony is approaching quickly, we would like to say goodbye. Have a look at our Facebook Page where all pictures, issues, radio shows, and also our video will be posted so that you can virtually relive the session. We look forward to seeing you again at a different session. Yours, Sebi and Doro

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Stress-Storming

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Participatory Democracy in Action

Content

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Exotic Werewolf Masseurs in the Dark and Other Stories A lonely sausage seeking affection

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Hobbies and EYP, easy combination or giant puzzle? Do you want to go out with me?

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Sleepless nights and bungee jumping Drones - a universal remedy?

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Far-right parties make Europe trumble Once you go CULT ...

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13 AFCO - The EYPenguins 14 JURI - David‘s Eleven 15 The Epic Unicorn chronicles

Educated terrorists, ninjas, vaccinations and intense discussions

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Tankycorn and friends TRANslook-a-likes

19 Not even CO can suffocate the DEVE committee 20 The AFET Challenge 21 „He‘s not the Messiah! He‘s a very naughty boy!“ 22 G.A.zing through the stars 23 I‘m feeling good ... 24 Guess the Journalist 25 Enthusiastic and extraordninary - Meet EMPL 2

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Stress-Storming

Participatory Democracy in Action

by Julia Cova (IT) Life is full of transitions and so is EYP. After embarrassing ice-breakers, breathtaking energisers, and strengthening teambuilding the committees had to face the hard task of coming up with convincing solutions to various issues. During Committee Work things get serious. No more ‘Aleles’ or ‘Funky Chickens’ but challenging and energy consuming discussions under the guidance of the delegates’ respective chairs. The process goes through various phases such as identifying the problems and facts that concern the topic, finding valid solutions and agreeing on them, and finally reaching the rushed final draft. The long hours composing Committee Work are often dense with stress and tension, but this should not be discouraging; in fact, it should motivate and keep the attention and creativity of all contributors going. Committee Work is the chance to really push forward opinions on the topic and to decide on the direction the resolution is going to take. From the first embarrassing games to a strong and complete resolution, the committees have undergone a great transformation in a very short time. Only some days ago complete strangers met for the very first time and now they are tied by a bond that will hopefully bring them together again in the future.

by Lorel Scriven (UK) The General Assembly is a perfect example of a participatory democracy in action because delegates are informed on the issues. They engage in informed debate and then decide their stance. This is how a participatory democracy should work, instead of the democracies that many of us live in where the electorate is not properly informed on the issues and elections become about people instead of policies. There are many valuable skills that the General Assembly can teach delegates. Firstly, they learn to make constructive points instead of points that only attack the resolution without offering alternative solutions. The General Assembly reaches its fullest potential when the direct response is used correctly, as this encourages delegates to fully listen to each other and then think on their feet in response, instead of just reading out points. Furthermore, through defending their resolution, delegates learn to defend their point of view even when it comes under intense questioning and criticism. The General Assembly is a valuable experience as it prepares delegates to engage fully in the participatory democracy in which they live and become active and engaged citizens.

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Exotic Werewolf Masseurs in the Dark and Other Stories by Thomas Wagenhammer (DE) Station One: Yoga & Massages with the Annas I started out in the gym. The atmosphere reminded me of that ‘Call on me’-video from 2004. Unfortunately, the gym had to be closed down before the end of the workshop but I dare say that it was a very fascinating experience for everyone involved.

participants had been split up into three groups with the task of re-enacting „Titanic“ in pictures. I bet the delegates enjoyed themselves during this unusual task. Station Four: Werewolf with Aneta & Manon A lot of delegates awaited me when I got to the room. Aneta had brought a Czech version of the activity game „Werewolf“ with her and the delegates seemed to have great fun discussing suspects and victims. Station Five: Dinner in the Dark with Marianne Have you ever had a Dinner in the Dark? Well, you missed your chance if you were not there. The participants were guided by a rope they had to follow in and out of the dark. There were different kinds of food and Marianne created a nice atmosphere for chatting and playing games. It got pretty loud, too.

Station Two: Japanese, Arabic, Persian with Debora & Siebe The opportunity to get to know exotic languages invited quite a few delegates to this workshop. From numbers to letters in Arabic to simple phrases in Japanese and Persian your horizon was definitely expanded. Station Three: Photography with Julia & Lorel When I got to the workshop, the participants had already finished and played „Mafia“. Before that, the

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A lonely sausage seeking affection by Aneta Fortelková (CZ) At the end of the hard Committee Work, everyone except the busily resolution typing chairs participated in the amazing BBQ. Participants could enjoy the delicious sausages, which everyone seemed to love, or choose from a variety of colourful vegetables as well as yummy potatoes. BBQ-participant ‘I went oops’-moment: BBQ-ing sausages in their plastic wrapper.

“The vegetables were a little burnt but it was okay” n my face” Siebe: “It was bigger tha

“Just give m e your sausa ge, I’m starvi “You can hav ng” e mine” “It’s bigger anyway”

“The BBQ was quite funny” od” “The meat was really go

“Have you ever seen a sausage burning?” “No, I’ve never seen a burnt sausage”

The smell of grilled sausage was all over the place, mixed with the sweet smell of early love. Yes, dear delegates, the so-called blind date that provoked butterflies in all your bellies seemed to be successful. The first signs of love were to be found all over the campus. As the Beatles would say: “All you need is love!”

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Hobbies and EYP, easy combination or giant puzzle?

to go t n a w u Do yo me? h it w t u o

by Marianne Delcroix (BE) A question you may be asked during teambuilding is: “What activities do you do outside of the European Youth Parliament?” It seems easy enough to answer; however, for many older members of EYP, the answer could be resumed to “currently none”. Of course, higher education has a lot do with this fact but many will go far enough to say that their regular participation in EYP is the cause of their lack of these activities. One of the major changes I have noticed in EYPer’s personal lives is the continuity of hobbies, sports and extramural activities. How often have I not heard a friend telling me they had to stop ballet classes, scouting or soccer in order to attend sessions regularly? Probably just as many times as I have heard of people dropping out of EYP events because of an important competition, a concert, a camp or an open-day. While some hobbies are indeed difficult to combine with EYP – for example scouting (or at least Belgian scouting), for which attending sessions means missing meetings, weekends or sometimes even camps – others, such as photography, can be more than easily combined. For instance, someone who enjoys editing videos will probably apply to part of a media team and somebody more into organising teams and their activities will be part of the chairs team. If I could only give one piece of advice before becoming a long-term EYPer, it would be to never let go what you are good at, even if this means you will have to miss the occasional meeting, practice or class. Who knows, you might even be able to show off your skills during Euroconcert!

s Ye o N aybe M like BBQ. I

by Anna Diehm (DE) While academic debates and political discussions are certainly the main aspect of the EYP, it also provides the chance to meet new people and start relationships that are going to outlast a single session. In order to facilitate this, we arranged blind dates for all delegates. They seem to have been quite successful from what we could tell. Pairs consisting of guys in button-down shirts and girls in cute skirts could be seen walking around. After meeting up at their designated spot, the couples could either go to the BBQ together or enjoy the tepid summer night more intimately. Some even took their dates up to their room but apparently “nothing happened”. Additionally to the more conventional blind dates, we also had some epic bromances happening. After they had gotten over the first shock, the boys seemed to have lots of fun as well. No matter the person you were paired up with, you are all surely going to enjoy the Titanic party tomorrow. Maybe you will even save a slow dance for your date?

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Sleepless nights and bungee jumping

by Anna Diehm (DE) Our Head Organiser Julia is certainly one of the busiest people at the session, always running around, multitasking and overlooking everything that needs to be done. Nevertheless, she still had time for a quick interview in between organising a jump start of a car over the phone. Q: What do you do when you don’t do EYP? A: I’m going to start studying IT in Zurich soon, which I’m really excited for. Apart from that I enjoy reading. Random fact about me: I’m in a rifle club and we’re going bungee jumping next Saturday – I’m terribly afraid. Q: How did you get into EYP? A: My teacher head-hunted me. Not everyone in Romanshorn knows about EYP, as the teachers only pick students of whom they think that they can manage the pressure of EYP and keep up with school. I started out at my nationals in Ticino in 2011 and then went from there. Q: Are your parents supporting you in doing EYP? A: Yeah, they were great. My mom did some great listening; she really activated Mama Bear. Q: How long have you been preparing the session? A: I signed a contract with EYP Switzerland in December 2012. Since then I have been in an onand off-relationship with the session.

Q: Have there been any particular highs and lows during the preparation of the session? A: The first meeting of the organisers was definitely a highlight. I did not have any particular lows, but there were some sleepless nights where I was just worrying about the session in general. However, as soon as I had my organisers’ team, I was quite confident that we would manage.

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Q: Well, let’s hope that the ship doesn’t sink. A: Yes! Otherwise I will be standing at the steering wheel - I know my role. Q: Do you like our session mascot Oops? A: Yes, I adore him! He’s so cute. Q: When was the last time you went oops? A: I’m very clumsy, so my organisers team is making fun of me constantly dropping things. Q: How are you going to feel during the Closing Ceremony? Are you happy to see it done or sad to see it go? A: I will definitely be sad, since we have been working on this for so long. Q: Are you happy with how the session is turning out? A: Yes, I’ve been getting great feedback! Q: Do you have a costume for the Titanic party? A: Yes, I am going to be the captain.

Q: What is your favourite memory that you’re going to take with you from the session? A: When the delegates arrived, I was so excited. I was literally jumping up and down and clapping my hands.

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Drones – a universal remedy? by Debora Darabi (DE) Kosovo, 1999 – NATO troops are invading Yugoslavia on an unsanctioned mission led by the US-military against the will of the UN Security Council as stated in its resolution 1199. Initially, the UN strongly advocated the negotiation of a cease-fire in Kosovo followed by the immediate retreat of Serbian and Yugoslavian troops employed for the oppression of the civilian population. This was to be followed by an unlimited collaboration of Slobodan Milosevic’s government with the tribunal on Yugoslavia in The Hague. After several NATO Member States, including France and the UK, violated the aforementioned resolution, they were never faced with the legal repercussions of their breach of international law which caused the deaths of thousands of Serbian and Kosovo Albanian civilians. Considering the generous financial contributions the US make to NATO-funding, the lack of any form of outcry on the part of the international community does not seem surprising in the least. Viewing the current debate on a military intervention in Syria as a direct parallelism to Kosovo, therefore, seems inevitable.

This time around, however, European political decision makers tread more carefully in joining in on yet another war head first, mainly due to the socio-political friction in the Middle East and the outrage of the European people. Interestingly, the psychological theory of learning from example appears to apply to political shortcomings as well. Wrongfully attacking an occupied zone instead of attempting to resolve the conflict in a more peaceful manner is slowly becoming a pattern for the American government. The empty shell the UN Security Council thus degrades itself to when failing one of its prime purposes, namely peacekeeping, is the unavoidable result. Ultimately, this begs the question which steps need to be taken in order to defend the basic human rights of the Syrian people in light of the atrocities, such as the alleged use of chemical weapons, they are being subjected to. Furthermore, the general deprivation of citizens’ rights under a dictatorial regime

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that has long lost the privilege of representing its people’s will need not be forgotten. Again, the past serves as the obvious answer: much like Yugoslavia/Kosovo would have needed the negotiation of an armistice, the disarmament of both opposing parties and the involvement of humanitarian organisations in aiding the people rebuild what has been taken from them by war and oppression, Syria is exhibiting symptoms to a very similar disease and can profit from the same prescription. This time we have the chance to prevent what is promising to become yet another humanitarian catastrophe, this time we have a chance to finally learn from our mistakes.


Far-right parties make Europe tremble by Julia Cova (IT) Tolerance, democracy, human rights, freedom, peace. These are only a few of the words upon which the European Union was built. Today these words are being picked at and damaged and the solid bases on which our union rests are weakening. There are numerous causes for this, in particular the rise of right and far-right populist parties. ‘Minister Kyenge has the features of an orang-utan’ and ‘she should work for her own country’ This is what Roberto Calderoli, senate vice-president of Lega Nord, said about Italy’s first black government minister. Below another comment from Mario Borghezio, also member of the Lega Nord party. „She seems like a great housekeeper but not a government minister.“ Shocking and disgraceful. Lega Nord is an Italian right-wing party which has been known for the extreme and tough stance it takes on immigration, especially from Muslim countries. It has been labelled, quite rightly, as ‘anti-immigrant’ and ‘xenophobic’. New far-right movements were also born lately. The one that appears most often in the news is a fascist political movement from Rome called ‘CasaPound’. A small community started this movement in 2003 and has now become very known, also internationally. Right and far-right parties are not only becoming popular in Italy but also in the rest of Europe with even higher support from the electorate. Examples are the ‘Front National’ in France and the ‘Freedom Party of Austria’ in Austria. Many issues nibble away at the bases and credibility of the European Union and the rise of populist right-wing parties enhances the unwanted fragility. We cannot hinder the economic and financial crisis, or unrests in the Middle East, but we can use our right to vote wisely.

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ONCE YOU GO CULT‌

by Siebe Geerts (BE) When I applied for the position of journalist I did not expect to end up in the Committe on Culture and Education and certainly not in one this overwhelming. It did not take me long to understand that this committee includes some of the most diverse personalities I have ever seen. Like Michele, who amazes everyone with his tree-climbing skills, or Marina, who filled the compliments box almost all by herself. There is also Kathi, who demands her name to be pronounced precisely as she wants to, Segen with the fluffy hair that everyone wants to touch, or Ilir, the shyest member of Greenpeace you have ever seen. There are others as well: Allegra poses like a professional even when blindfolded and poor Dominique is not really fond of helicopters, because they make her feel nauseated. They are all citizens governed by Lara, their chair. It might be the smallest committee and although being a journalist keeps me from choosing sides, I have to admit that CULT truly is the most awesome committee in Romanshorn, even though I am worried a little by Behare’s odd desire to dress me up like a girly girl. Thank you my dear CULT for being awesome!

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The Epic Unicorn chronicles I am going to tell you now Why when I see them I go wow For they have the prettiest horns My lovely epic unicorns They are all first class drunken bottles And could easily stand the wobbles By talking about any topic The list of those is telescopic But the one I thought was the most fun If I had only to pick one Soft, made of sugar, white and pink Marshmallows, of course, what did you think?

by Marianne Delcroix (BE) Once upon a time there was a far land called EYP. The inhabitants of this land were divided in ten tribes. One of these tribes was called DROI and lived in the bottom corner of the secondary territory. They were nicknamed the Epic Unicorns and were brought together by their will to change the world. They battled for the power of choice over life and death, discussing each other’s ideas and opinions for hours. This ancient and powerful civilisation will be forever remembered for their cooperation, friendship, smiles, and proud shouts of glory. In those times, if you had the possibility of walking through their territory, you might have heard the powerful “Epic? Unicorns!” shout they used to share their success when accomplishing a mission. Up to this day, the legends descending through the ages still represent them as strong and proud warriors, and songs about them, such as the one I am about to give you, are still well-known:

Their committee room is pretty cute a fact that I cannot dispute Decorated with drawings, post-it’s and flip-charts It seems they are experts of fine arts They are now ready to embark Prepared to shine and also spark Led by their chair Ipek Into a long journey of committee work They only stopped for Coffee breaks To fill themselves with fruit, pop-corn and cakes You could see that in the end None of them could still pretend That with their resolution they were not pleased And so general assembly was greatly eased They made points and raised their placard And even sometimes the board flattered I can say I will not hesitate To celebrate each and every delegate And I ask myself no more questions On whether they will do more sessions!

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AFCO – the EYPenguins by Manon Schürch (CH) Dear penguins of AFCO, these past few days have been filled with wonderful new experiences which you perhaps were not expecting to happen when you boarded that train or plane to Romanshorn. You have shown effort and commitment and we are so proud that you have succeeded in finding your own place in this incredible committee by working hard to find solutions together in teambuilding and Committee Work. I hope your journey in EYP will go on and that you will gain lots of wonderful new experiences. But for now: Good luck in General Assembly. Alexis Marin – Adélie Penguin Just like the Adélie penguin, Alexis adopts a fast cruising speed with minimum energy cost. This lad always hits the nail right on the head whenever he voices his opinion in Committee Work. Merle Macpherson – Humboldt Penguin A trait of the Humboldt Penguin is that he remains within the nest until he has fully developed. Merle seems quite reserved but at the right moment is more than capable voicing her well thought through opinion. Kristina Bright – White-flippered Penguin Same as Kristina, these penguins stay with the colony during the day and then leave under the cover of darkness and return before dawn. Our endearing party girl was already spotted to almost have fallen asleep during Committee Work. Cécile Schluep – Rockhopper Penguin Despite being amongst the smallest of penguins, Rockhopper penguins are perhaps the most aggressive ones. Just like Cécile as she has proven that more than once in Committee Work when defending her own opinion. Adriana Modrego – African Penguin Just like this penguin, Adriana is also able to successfully exploit warm terrestrial environments. This lovely Spaniard has taken the warm Spanish climate with her to Romanshorn.

Anouk Werro – Gentoo Penguin Anouk , similar to the Gentoo penguin who has the ability to produce large numbers of chicks, has shown us that she can produce a large number of arguments which she will for sure continue on doing during GA. Liridon Biblekaj – Chinstrap Penguin Liridon shares the trait of his associated penguin since they are both very social people. The self-proclaimed charming Liridon is always seen surrounded by a group of friends. Sabina Dalipova – Yellow-eyed penguin Our great cook Sabina has already almost burned down her kitchen at home. Just like the Yellow eyed penguin who already made it onto the New Zealand $5 note, she is our celebrity amongst the “Oops moments”. Richard Nöbauer – Snares Penguin The Snares penguin wipes out its own population whenever he feels threatened. Richard does also not shy back of killing innocent journos during the Ninja game and showing no mercy whatsoever. Aurelia Siegfried – Little Blue Penguin Our Aurelia, similar to the female Little Blue penguin who matures at a really early age, has proven in Committee Work that she is no stranger to debating in a mature and thought through way. Klara Andersson (Chairperson) – Emperor Penguin The Emperor penguin being the tallest and most majestic penguin of them all, can easily be associated with the charming and lovely chairperson of AFCO, Klara. Not only is she the tallest of them all, but with her calm and yet determined manner she will make AFCO steal everybody’s show at the General Assembly.

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JURI – David’s Eleven 11 delegates, one mission: protecting whistleblowers from persecution, while maintaining governments’ security.

by Debora Darabi (DE) Dear JURI, During these five lovely days that we spent together, I have watched you conquer the blind square, get caught in the giant spider’s web, dismantle American surveillance programs, plunge into the depth of classified files, unravel the moral dilemma of doing the right thing and finally fall in love with any and all chicken-related games. When I signed up for being a journalist in JURI, frankly I did not expect to encounter eleven delegates with backgrounds and mindsets as diverse and divergent as I have come to known. From Switzerland, Germany and Spain to India, China and the US, while you come from different places and speak in different tongues, you tried to work as one. I have seen you stick to your guns and fervently stand your ground, at times creating a clash of opinions and promoting lively discussions. That being said, I sincerely hope that the challenges you faced being individuals in this group made you grow as people as well as Europeans and remember what makes the EYP: the extraordinary people involved in it. As you are reading this, you can hopefully reminisce about the session with some fond memories, despite the lack of sleep; I know I sure will. Thank you for letting me accompany you on this journey and I hope our paths will cross once again. Loads of love, Debora P.S. #burning2millionfrancsforblacksmoke #swissstyle

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Educated terrorists, Ninjas, Vaccinations and Intense discussions by Anna Zellweger (CH) After recent swine and bird flu scares across Europe, experts have spotted a new phenomenon spreading at lightning speed. To analyse this new discovery they have put certain infected individuals under observation in Romanshorn. Scientists have observed that the so-called “ENVI”-virus has effects unlike any they have ever seen before. They have found that the regular symptoms of fever and nausea are nonexistent. However, they have discovered rather peculiar behavioural patterns amongst the infected. These include the sudden need to attack people making ninja sounds, lifting each other up in a worshipping manner and the constant fear of the world ending. Besides these rather peculiar side effects, the individuals seem to have developed incredibly interesting personal symptoms. One of the individuals under observation, Jan Nedvídek, seems to have developed a new evolutionary theory in which mankind did not evolve from the ape but from whales. Others are in the process of creating a whole new species: the Cabbit (cat-rabbit). Amongst the infected people, there is a group which has developed a strong bond amongst each other in a very short time through exercising some very peculiar rituals. Besides building up a consistent bond and trust amongst one another, they have also focused their minds on one task: Spreading the virus! In the past few days they have developed impressive debating and discussion skills, preparing for the ultimate showdown they call “GA”.

The ENVI virus has yet to be understood by the experts but all agree on one thing: there is no escaping it! All individuals that come within the range of infection will be ENVI-ed! Here are some of the observations made during studying the core of ENVI: How about we call the terrorist a freedom fighter #Thinkingoutsidethebox We don’t need a good cook; we just need a cook #Gettingtheessentialsstraight One of the key things of a successful team is learning from your mistakes #Inspirational Parents are also people #Thanksforclearingthatup “Bra” means good in Swedish #Iseewhatyoudidthere Sweden is a very special country #Patriotism Let’s make them compulsory, but not compulsory #alrightthen...

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Tankycorn and friends by Anna Diehm (DE)

This is the story of a unicorn, a very special one at that. Tankycorn spent his youth like the rest of his kind, eating candy grass and flying amongst the clouds. One day he had enough and decided to see the world and have an adventure. After flying over tall mountains, he got tired and settled in a pretty little town at a big lake. An event of some sort seemed to be going on, as loads of young humans were running around and playing weird games. His hiding place was discovered by some of them, a group that called themselves the “Smartest ever delegates ever� or sometimes also SEDE. They immediately adopted him and brought him to their room. In there, they spent hours discussing how the army works in different countries and whether to abolish conscription or not. However, for people that talk about military all day, they were actually quite peace-loving. There were balloons with speaking rules spread all over the room. Every now and then they

made sure to go outside and play crazy games with Tankycorn. During one of them, confusingly called Cat and Mouse even though neither of the animals were present, they even raced around the whole building. Even though they were some of the loveliest humans Tankycorn had ever seen, he still missed his family. So with a heavy heart he decided to leave his new friends and go back home. Worried about his safety on the long journey, SEDE built him a flying tank and decorated it with peace symbols and flowers. Tankycorn was overjoyed, as it made flying so much easier. So with one last wave of his horn, Tankycorn left SEDE, vowing to never forget them and the time they had spent together.

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TRANsLook-A-Likes by Thomas Wegenhammer (DE) Since the journalist of TRAN often thinks that people look like other people or celebrities but usually is not able to pin down their names, he needed the assistance of an online look-a-like generator (celebrity.picadilo.com).

Meyas Trust me, you do not look that old. Although I think that Jason Statham is more of a compliment.

These are pretty random. No offence.

Rezvan The generator is not random at all.

Anton Lorel (journalist from UK) had to laugh really hard when she saw the similarity to the Queen, mate.

Valentin I think it mistook you for a woman. Seriously, I do not want to know who made this programme.

Barbara Well, they are not too far from the truth. Apart from the hair colour and that creepy guy.

Vera This was my favourite. Your ear has more similarities with Lady Gaga than you might have thought. Embrace it.

Cedric I did not even know Madeleine Albright before.

TRANToniA We love you, even if you look like Tom Hanks. According to the online thing.

Daniel Apparently, Cate Blanchett was the wrong person for Galadriel. You would be so much better, really. Isabella Well, not much to say here. Britney and Reese are quite comparable to you. Luc I personally think you look like Macklemore with glasses; but who cares what I say?

Tom Well, I have never heard before that I look like Susan Sarandon. I take it as a compliment. I hope that this session has opened your eyes to what lies beyond the horizon. May trains and planes guide your every step and may you never cross any roadblocks ever. I enjoyed being your journalist very much and I hope that this is not goodbye.

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Enthusiastic and extraordinary – meet EMPL by Aneta Fortelkova (CZ) Hello, this is us, the employment and social affairs committee. We are the ones coming up with solutions for the lack of graduates in the fields of science, technology, engineering and mathematics (STEM) and addressing the considerable gender distortion among STEM students. To introduce ourselves to you, we will tell you a little more about ourselves. Let's start with Michael, Mike as we call him, who is our mozzarella man. Talking about food, there is Elia, who loves eating. Then we have Laura, who is fond of laughing, Rahel who loves reading, or Tugce, who appreciates trying out new things. Melten happens to be at the right place, since she is fond meeting new people. Lothaire likes doing a lot of things and Elise has a passion for music. Damiano is devoted to chatting and Alyssa doesn’t act. Our chairs seem to be infatuated with sports. Anthony enjoys archery and Saki takes delight in skating. Then there’s also Benedikt, our baseball fan, and Alexander, who has become enchanted by Swiss apples. Therefore, we would like to ask the organisers if it is possible to give any leftover apples to our dear delegate. Finally, there is the journo Aneta, who likes animals. Meow. As Saki, the future student of natural sciences at Cambridge University, said: “Let's talk about stem cells!”. After dealing with the “what's”, “why's”, “how's” and “who's”, we succeeded with completing our resolution and we are now looking forward to the GA! “We are the EMPL! But what the hell are we gonna tell? Well, we’re the best, as you can tell!”

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Not even CO2 can suffocate the DEVE committee! by Julia Cova (IT) Apocalyptic, the grey hot mist spreads before the DEVE Committee, but unafraid they advance in the thick fog. Along the path they are walking on, factory chimneys rise menacingly into the sky emitting ill-smelling, dark masses that continuously aliment that great veil of polluted fog. They vaguely remember the days in which that non-existent sky had been blue and infinite. Now, the smog hangs upon their sweating bodies. They have met recently in the town of Romanshorn and from there on have embarked on the challenging quest for clean air in the world. Some have travelled a long way as S. who came the whole way from Sweden, or A., the wise one, who came from neighbouring Norway. Tightly together they walk in a most peculiar way. They call them ‘silly walks’, even though most humans walk in such a fashion because of deformations and movement-impediment, and they use them to conceal their identity from the heartless money-makers that get wealthy by impoverishing the fertility of Earth. One delegate, C., carries nature in his feet and whenever he steps on the hard cement ground, colourful flowers sprout out. The delegates are forced to cover their eyes, which are stinging and watering because of the

acid air, by tying cloth around their heads and rely on the courageous P. to guide them along the path. They discuss fervently, identifying the issues that cause this disaster and brainstorming on possible and effective solutions. The discussion sometimes gets frustrating but as all heroes they do not give up. Cautiously they advance to their final destination: Frauenfeld. In Frauenfeld, a secret underground assembly waits for them to listen to their propositions and to vote on a possible revolution. Walking into the distance they chant:

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‘The committee on DEVE, Is going the straight way, To find the solution, Against all the pollution!’


The AFET Challenge Standing in that first circle at the start of teambuilding, staring round at new faces, is a daunting experience. However, led by their chairperson, Timm Brünjes, AFET soon started to get to know each other. During teambuilding there was an extremely long game of ninja, a heated balloon debate and a seemingly impossible spider’s web. However, AFET came together and developed into a respectful and close-knit team. This prepared them for Committee Work where there was heated but respectful debate over many issues. So I decided to put AFET’s knowledge of each other to the test. In each of the bubbles below are facts about a particular delegate. Try to match each bubble to a picture of a delegate. Hopefully this challenge will help you keep the memories of the session with you.

Favourite film s: Forrest Gum p, Supernatu If he were an ral animal he wou ld be: An Eagl Looks like: D e avid Tennant

Favourite trav el destinations : Russia, Que Favourite film bec, Chicago s: Batman, Th e Great Dicta If he were an tor animal he wou ld be: Grizzly bear

Favourite film s: Lord of the Rings, Harry King’s Speec Potter, The h Favourite trav el destination: Malta If he were an animal he wou ld be: a mouse

Favo ur Guet ite artists ta : Mic hael Favo Jack urite son, movie If she Rihan s: Th were na, D e Hu an an avid nger imal G a she w mes, ould T w ilig be: a dog ht

Favourite travel destinations: Palestine, Morocco, Cuba Favourite movies: Pride & Prejudice, Titanic Looks like: Stephanie Meyer, Kristen Stewart

Favourite mov ies: Zero Dark Thirty, Black Nemo Swan, Findin g Favourite trav el destinations : Manhattan, Looks like: W Paris oody Allen Favourite foot baller: Valentin Stocker Favourite trav el destination: Winter Springs Alpes, Ireland , Swiss If she were an animal she w ould be: a rabb it

Favourite travel destinations: Sweden, Australia, France Favourite movies: Catch me if you can, Secret Window, Mr Bean Favourite artists: Johnny Depp, Florence and the Machine, Sean Penn

Favourite travel destinations: Thailand, Mallorca, London Favourite films: The Hobbit, Harry Potter, Game of Thrones Looks like: Ben Affleck

Favourite film s: Inception, The Great Gat Game of Thro sby, Star War nes s, Favourite trav el destinations : Stockholm, co, Copenha San Francisgen Looks like: H arry Styles

Favourite artis ts: Pedro Alm odóvar, Lana Favourite trav del Rey, Björk el destinations : San Francisc Seville o, Paris, Looks like: En rique Iglesias

r, Inception s: Transporte m fil ite ur vo Fa t: Mark Detrie Favourite artis in Looks like: Put

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“He’s Not The Messiah! He’s A Very Naughty Boy!” by Manon Schürch (CH) This extract was taken from “Life Of Brian” by the brilliant Monty Python, a comedy group from Great Britain. Established back in 1969, it consisted of six still rather unknown male comedians. They started writing several sketches together and slowly reached a wider audience. The people loved them and still do because of their dark and obscure humour. “Life of Brian”, which premiered in 1979, parodies the life of Jesus and is probably the group’s most controversial and hilarious film. It quickly reached a high score in the box office because of its particular humor and its highly satirical topics on religious and social subjects such as the crucifixion of Jesus, the following of a Messiah, and stoning. At the same time it parodies biblical films of the last centuries. Some say the film is blasphemous and that such a film could never be made today. Others believe it is both respectful and the most accurate film ever made of the time of Christ. Because of its rather controversial outlook on religious beliefs, the movie was banned in several conservative American states, as well as in some places in Great Britain. Conservative Christian viewers described the movie as extremely outrageous and impudent to their Christian beliefs. They are offended by the mockery of Jesus’ life, which is portrayed by the character Brian. In the end, there is only one thing left to say to both sides: “Always look on the bright side of life!”

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G.A.zing through the stars by Marianne Delcroix (BE) General assembly is always a good time to call upon the session star gazer. Your astrological sign may determine not only your day to day decisions, but also your EYP future. Here is our weekly result: Aries (March 21- April 19): Although your next application will be brilliant, you will sadly not be selected. Do not worr; the next two will be successful and will be much more enjoyable! Taurus (April 20 – May 20): According to the junction between Venus and Pluto, your future holds an amazing journalist career. You will, however, forget to pack your camera charger on a regular basis. Oops! Gemini (May 21- June 20): Even if you are a bit shy at times, you tend to be quite outgoing during sessions. Embrace your EYP self, you will enjoy it! Cancer (June 21- July 22): The presence of shooting stars around the Capricorn constellation means that you are a

future president. Keep up the good work and watch out for back-stabbers. Leo (July 23 – August 22): Do not worry if you are the only member of your delegation to continue in the EYP, just show the others how much you enjoy it and they will be running back. Virgo (August 23 – September 22): You will find the love of your life during a session. It might not happen straight away but keep your eyes open. May the odds be ever in your favour! Libra (September 23 – October 22): You may be wondering what it feels like to be an official, try it out and you will love it. When time comes to fill out an application, do not hesitate. We trust your decision! Scorpio (October 23 – November 21): Everybody attending sessions with you will love you most of the time; however, your stingy questions and remarks turn you into their worst nightmare during General Assembly. Congratulations!

Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21): Not everyone is meant to be a delegate. Sleeping committee members, between other cases, are annoying for a chair. You will know that when you are a chairing expert! Capricorn (December 22 – January 19): With stars like yours, you will be nothing less than a very experienced editor. In a few years you will get as many journalist applications to select from as Harry Potter got letters from Hogwarts. Aquarius (January 20 – February 18): Jupiter’s current position indicates that you are made to be a Head Organiser. The sad prospect of sleepless nights has to be brightened by that of many happy smiles from your delegates. Pisces (February 19 – March 20): Organiser, chair, and journo, you want to try it all. Apply to as many sessions as possible and it may turn out to be more than just a dream. Just saying!

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I’M FE ELING GOOD …

by Siebe Geerts (BE) and Manon Schürch (CH)

Since sadness and hate are totally 2012, we, the Media Team, have decided to provide you with a moment of joy à la Oprah. That is why we have set up a beautiful mailbox here for compliments only. Friendship is what we expected, but it is love that you can look forward to in this article. Unfortunately, the identity of all senders will remain anonymous. ‘Sophie, you have got a great jazzy voice’ #BETTERTHANBIEBER ‘Thank you to all the organisers for making this happen.’ #YOUHAVEGOTTHEWRONGBOX ‘Elia, I am super happy to be your friend!’ #BFF #NWLY ‘Caspar (JURI) love your facial expressions!’ #LAUGHINGSOHARDRIGHTNOW ‘CULT, you are a very cool committee, I like every single one of you!’ #BESTCOMMITTEE #AWWW ‘AFCO, you are an awesome committee and I enjoy spending time with you!’ #BESTCOMMITTEEFORSURE ‘I saw that girl Alex (ENVI). She looks like a model, her eyes are amazingly bright and blue and her legs are tanned.’ #ABRIDGETOOFAR ‘To the girl with the great booty, you have got a great booty.’ #BOOTILICIOUS #IGOTITFROMMYMOMMA ‘Elisa (ENVI), I absolutely LOVE your style! Your dresses are really cute. <3’ #GIRLTALK ‘Journos we love you stalking us with cameras!’ #SOMUCHLOVEFORYOU ‘Gabriel, you are a very lovely and funny person. I like you!’ #FUTUREHUSBAND1 ‘Ilhami, I think you are a calm and nice person. I like you’ #FUTUREHUSBAND2 ‘Joy from ENVI. Communication without words works best!’ #IAMSODEEP ‘Lothaire, love the way you moved yesterday night on “I got it from my momma”’ #DANCINGQUEEN ‘Benedikt (EMPL), I’m so glad you’re here, otherwise I wouldn’t have eaten the cat meat.’ #KILLTHECATANDEATIT ‘Meyas, stop trying to seduce the statue of the naked woman next to the karaoke room!’ #ASIFYOUHADACHANCE ‘Alex(AFET): Your shirt looks amazing! #DUH Thank you for sending us all these compliments! And remember: sharing is caring! lots of love, your Media Team

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GUESS THE JOURNALIST.

Guess the Journalist

Manon (AFCO)

Siebe (CULT)

Marianne (DROI)

Julia (DEVE)

Anetta (EMPL)

Tom (TRAN)

Anna (SEDE)

Doro (editor)

Sebi (editor)

Lorel (AFET)

Anna (ENVI)

Debora (JURI)

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Triple Ooops - Issue 3