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The Student Newspaper of Seattle Preparatory School

The Seattle Prep Panther April 1, 1819

www.thetransformedwife.org

Volume 74 No. 1

Twitter: @seepreppanther Instagram: @seepreppanthers

The Panther sues Drama Department over Newsies Production REESE WITHOUT-A-SPOON Managing Editor

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n the weeks following the closing of Seattle Prep’s highly acclaimed musical “Newsies”, representatives of the Panther Journalism Program are in unrest over the representation of the newspaper in the musical. In the musical, newsboy Jack Kelly unites the newsies of New York to fight against the immoral editor of “The World,” Joseph Pulitzer. Due to this portrayal the newspaper is claiming that sales have been down 70% with violent threats on the editors and harassment of the staff members. Panther Staff Member Maddie Deasy ’20 said she fears for her life. “People have come up to me and told me that I am a horrible person.” The Panther is now suing “Newsies” under claims of slander and libel. The court case is planned to commence on April 1, 2019. The Panther claims that “Newsies”, through their villainous portrayal of Pulitzer, incited a deep public outcry against The Panther that brought unwarranted and detrimental harm.

Newspaper adviser Micah Richardson, who recently passed under mysterious circumstances, prior to his passing said “If I die, blame Othman.” The former advisor of the Panther spoke in defense of his team, stating “They’re all good kids. Yes, they’re all here willingly and no, the rumors of forced labor and torturous hours are not true.” Tom Robinson ’20, who played strike leader Jack Kelly in the musical, is deeply offended at the lawsuit by The Panther. Robinson said, “This is preposterous. This musical is bringing to light injustices and the newspaper wants to make this a sob story about their failure.” This feud is tearing families apart. Social Media editor of The Panther, Joe Robinson ’20, who happens to be the twin brother of Tom Robinson ’20 said that the two haven’t spoken in weeks. Both Robinsons have filed restraining orders and emancipation requests to cut ties entirely. Both sides have expressed a wish for the issue to be resolved but are caught in a stalemate and no compromise is visible in the foreseeable future. While the dispute is not yet settled the carnage and harm it has caused is undeniable.

Photo: Courtesy of Seattle Prep Drama Seattle Prep Drama’s production of Newsies was a box office success however, the production is now being sued by The Panther.

Prep Library Becomes Cafeteria Hotspot DORA WINIFRED REED ‘123 Staff Writer

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fter the lengthy snow days, some Prep classes are slightly behind schedule and students are struggling to keep up. As a result, Prep’s administration officially decided to add another cozy lunch spot at Prep to help keep students focused on their classes. The location of HQ4? Prep’s own McKay Library. “The cozy vibe of this reading room was a central factor in choosing a new place for students to eat their lunch,” says school President, Mr. Hickey. “I always see students being productive in there… why can’t they increase that productivity by adding brain food?” Also, a recent study by Bibliotheque University concluded that students who eat and socialize in a room surrounded by books immensely increased their test scores that compared to students who just ate in a cafeteria. “When I read this study, I knew I just had to make our library another eating spot. In fact, I’m thinking about adding bookshelves to our cafeteria and

Commons to enhance student’s learning experience,” added Hickey. After a long history of the no food and drink policy, the library is now open for students to eat whenever they feel the urge to. “We already feed student’s brains, might as well feed their hungry stomachs!” exclaimed Mrs. Borgen. “As long as you clean up and don’t damage the resources, you’re welcome to chill in here,” said Mrs. Lovejoy. The librarian’s desks will have a button that when pushed, it will turn into a food serving station similar to the one in the cafeteria. The normal entrees, as well as the new addition of a rotating buildyour-own taco and acai bowl stations will be served here. Prep is also adding a large Kombucha vending machine in the library for health-conscious and trendy teens and a hot tea/hot chocolate vending machine to help students de-stress. At the library tables, each student must get a compostable placemat to put under their food to prevent critters from invading the room. “We want students to experience

Prep’s learning additions to the fullest, but we don’t want to deal with any unwanted guests at our school,” said Mr. Stearns. “Just remember to clean up after your-

selves!” If you find yourself eating in the library, don’t forget to thank the snow days and the staff who made it possible.

“I am devastated at the idea of no longer having school. I do not know what I am going to do now that I will not be able to get tid bits of life advice from my teachers anymore.” There will be no more graded discussions to learn from, AP exam quizzes to fail or in class writes to rewrite. With a heavy heart, AP Literature dies along with the school itself. Senior Lina Usibelli is distraught by the thought of not having AP Biology with the unforgettable James Bond of teachers: Mr. Johnston, Biology teacher by day and

counselor also by day. Usibelli is most upset about no longer having reading quizzes; “We will never again be tested on our reading skills and abilities to remember pages and pages worth of biological texts.” This shocking news has impacted people in a variety of ways. Many like Usibelli and McNett, who have emotional connections to the school, are devastated, others however oddly enough are joyous, or even annoyed upon hearing the rumors. Sophomore Jennifer Humes is one of the very few who are ecstatic at the clo-

sure of our beloved school. Humes looks forward to the closure; “Okay I don’t see why this is not a good thing! We just have an extra long summer to spend with our fellow Prep heads! No school means no homework!” What Humes does not realize is how much tougher this will be. The school issued a statement regarding this new change to the schedule, it said “At this time, we will be implementing Digital Learning Days to account for the days remaining during the school year.”

The New McKay Library Lunch Rules -Food served daily from 10am-1pm -Compostable placemats provided by Seattle Prep Librarians (if they act like they don’t know what you’re talking about, keep asking) -NoodleTools Noodle Bar operates Monday, Wednesday, Friday -Popcorn Friday! Popcorn available during lunch every other Friday -Kombucha vending machine offers Strawberry-Lemon ade, Peach, Apricot, Ginger -Daily clean-up provided by Frosh Collegios

Prep to Cease Classes Beginning April 1

KAT CONCES ‘19 Staff Writer

Attention Prepsters! After many weeks of consideration, late night meetings, a multitude of heated parent-teacher meetings and strikes from teachers, the rumors have been proven to be true this time: Seattle Preparatory School has been closed. With a sad heart, Mrs. Luby has given teachers a two week notice before the shut-down. Greeting this decision with great dismay, senior Liam McNett says


EDITORIAL$

2 APRIL 1, 2019

PANTHER STAFF Directed by ROBERT B. WEIDE Executive Producer LARRY DAVID Executive Producer JEFF GARLIN Executive Producer GAVIN POLONE Co-Executive Producer ROBERT B. WEIDE Produced by TIM GIBBONS Co-Producer ERIN O'MALLEY Consulting Producer ALAN ZWEIBEL Starring LARRY DAVID as Himself JEFF GARLIN as Jeff Green CHERYL HINES as Cheryl David Guest Starring MICHAEL YORK Guest Starring RICHARD LEWIS Guest Starring SHELLEY BERMAN as Nat David Guest Starring PAUL SAND as Guy Bernier Guest Starring PAUL DOOLEY as Cheryl's Dad and SUSIE ESSMAN as Susie Green Associate Director DALE STERN Stage Manager JONATHAN HARRIS Director of Photography BILL SHEELY

EDITORIAL POLICY The Seattle Prep Panther is a forum for student work and the editorial board makes final decisions regarding publication. The editorial board’s responsibility is not only to present one viewpoint, but evangelize and force this viewpoint on all who read. The board works to provide deeply biased and unfounded conspiracy and propagnada that perpetuates our singular, black and white perception of reality. To contact The Panther: Email: seapreppanther@seaprep.org Instagram: @seapreppanthers Twitter: @seapreppanther

EDITOR: FREESHA VACADO '19

Goodbye Books, Hello Nerf Bullets: Faculty Join Assassin MAC DONALD '19 Photo Editor

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ith the annual game of Senior Assassin kicking off again, Seniors are strapped, planning, and paranoid. However, this year the beloved game has a brand new twist, Senior Assassin is now: Teacher Edition. It all happened one sunny day in the OSL. Owen Hendricks ’19, who is the organizer of this whole event, was in a major planning mode. Witnesses say he was talking to himself and doing extreme calculations with Randomeister all while counting his box of money and hunting down seniors who had not paid or given him a notecard with their phone number. Mr. Stearns was amazed and intrigued by the whole process. He wanted to take part too. Suddenly, Stearns had a realization: “Man, assassin is the greatest thing ever! Why would I ban it?! This game is truly representing the pinnacle of Seattle Prep and must be shared with our faculty members.” As Stearns approached Hendricks with timidity, he cautiously asked if there could be any possibility this game could be extended to all faculty members at Prep.

With suspicion inside of him, Hendricks said, “maybe.” This “maybe” was all Stearns needed. He was so ecstatic that students reported seeing him running down the halls and skipping with gratitude at the mere thought that he might get to shoot a student with a nerf gun. Hendricks, on the other side was skeptical of the idea himself, so he took it to the polls, the Instagram polls that is. Astonishingly enough, 100% of seniors voted to include teachers, however their motives behind the votes were unclear. Grace Behrman ’19 admitted, “I really just want a chance to take down a teacher who has wronged me in this joke of a grading system that we call ‘school’. I want my revenge” Behrman was one of many students who, when asked, said they wanted to get back at their teachers. In fact, I, Abby Arthur, daughter of Craig Arthur happened to have the biggest vendetta of them all: my very own father. Therefore, this round of assassin was shaping out to be the most personal in the history of the game, to say the least. Soon after, Hendricks revealed the results of the poll to Stearns, who was once again, seen jumping around and sprinting

throughout the halls with glee. Quite a sight. Now, time to fast forward. The first round of assassin typically seeks to weed out the weak and lazy players. The rounds that follow begin to get increasingly more discreet and the sneaky tactics of teachers and students alike become heightened. Trust and security is only found within the physical boarders of Seattle Prep because once one steps off the campus, they are vulnerable and risking their life. Finally, the moment has come; the final round. The players left are (as coincidence would have it): Mr. Stearns, Mrs. Tordillos, Coach Scott, Grace Jordan, Ethan Anderson, Mr. Arthur, and myself. As if this was not crazy enough; my father is my target. The future of the victors of assassin is still unknown, however, let’s just say that a certain Craig Arthur is on edge. As he is obviously no longer safer at home, he has moved out of the house and refuses to text me back or embarrass me in the halls. Arthur’s Find My Friends Location has been turned off, but rumor has it he has moved back in with his mother for safety. The moral of this is to stay strapped with your Nerf guns and be on the lookout, you never know who is around the corner watching your every move (@craigarthur).

Why Surfaces are Better Than iPads FREESHA VACADO '19 Online Editor

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MISSION STATEMENT The Seattle Prep Panther is a student created, student-run journalism program which provides the Seattle Prep community with accurate, informative articles and media while practicing the components of a professional newspaper. The staff aims to create an informative newspaper and website which focus on issues important to our high school community.

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PREP LIFE EDITOR: NATALIE NOWAK ‘21

3 APRIL 1, 2019

Digital Learning Days Make a Comeback for Spring Break PAIGE BROWN ‘21 Staff Writer

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hroughout the second semester Seattle Prep has missed roughly five days of school solely because of the snow. Many students enjoyed the first two snow days as it meant getting to sleep in after “retreat-a-palooza” and sledding with friends. However, it was in the following snow days when students began to beg for a normal school day again due to the dreaded Digital Learning Days. Students were stuck inside their houses with hours of homework all while seeing the beautiful white snow fall outside their windows. However, the teachers did not have the same reaction, in fact they loved the Digital Learning Days. They loved them so much, they made the executive decision to add a required five weekdays of digital learning over spring break. Collegio teacher Ms. Healy stated, “The teachers and I felt the time and effort put into the Digital Learning Days have helped the student’s dedication and time management skills and decided to implement another week of this to see them become even more efficient.” Now, students at Prep must be wondering, WHY? The simple explanation to this addition of Digital Learning Days is that it relieves the added stress of homework and tests when the break is over. Teachers explained that every time a break concludes they become filled with stress and complaints from students about the overload of homework and tests filling their class periods. Teacher figured that while the initial reaction to Digital Learning Days over break would be negative, students would eventually realize the decrease in “aftermath” stress and everyone in the Seattle Prep community will ultimately be happier.

“The Teachers and I are well aware that Digital Learning Days are hard but we see your smiles on the days with little homework and we just want to see all the students happy after spring break because they will have less homework” said science teacher, Mr. Meza. As Seattle Prep students were interviewed, “happy” is the last word that comes to mind when they shared their opinion on these added learning days. Sophomore Emily Amesquita shared that on the Digital Learning Days, “I would wake up at 9 and work until 10, it was anything but enjoyable.”

One of the main issue’s students are having with this addition is the amount of time they are spending on vacations and how digital learning days just wont fit in. For example, Seattle Prep’s students going on the New Orleans Service Trip will be busy for six out of the seven days working in the Lower Ninth Ward. “Digital Learning Days is the last thing I have time for on spring break! I’m building a house for six hours a day and Digital Learning Days is still more time consuming and harder than that!” said Bella Metcalf ’19. In response to this concern, counselors, like Mr. Johnston, advised that “I

would highly recommend that students discuss cancelling their trips with their parents in order to make time for Digital Learning Days because we know that it will benefit them to get more time.” Seattle Prep students and administration clearly have different opinions on the return of Digital Learning Days, but as always, the teachers have the last word and judging by that, Digital Learning Days will be back. A word of advice to all students, hunker down and get ready for a spring break full of surface screens and online teaching lessons because there is no going back.

Prep Announces Permanent Removal of Late Starts CAROLINE_SPORTSGIRL ‘21 Staff Writer

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his 2018-19 school year, there seems to be a shortage of late starts on Wednesdays. This has been alarming to the students at Seattle Prep, sparking rumors around campus that there will not be late starts for the following school year. Last year Prep had 35 late starts, and by the end of this year we will have had 22. Although this may be shocking to the student body, Dean of Students, Mr. Stearns, has in fact confirmed that there will be no late starts next year. He said, “The faculty and staff have come to a formal agreement on eliminating late starts for the 2019-2020 school year because we believe that they are pointless and do not serve any purpose to our students or staff other than take away

valuable learning time.” This shocking change to the school schedule next year that has upset many students. The reason many people love the late starts is because it allows students to sleep in and be more awake and -Mr. Stearns focused in school. Sophia King ‘21 expressed her concern about this change when she said, “When we do not have a late start, I can’t focus, and I fall asleep in my classes. I am usually a very conscientious student but without late starts, my A’s drop to D’s. I think it is ridiculous that the faculty and staff think this will help

our learning, because taking them away will destroy our grades.” Elsa Kammereck ’22 communicated her struggles on nonlate start mornings. Kammereck does not believe this change will be beneficial to anyone in the Prep community. She said, “When I heard the rumors I just couldn’t believe it. Who thought that this would be a good idea? I definitely don’t. Without late starts, I feel miserable every morning as I wake up wanting to go back to bed. My school work will be lazy, and maybe I will start to

“They are pointless and... take away valuable learning time”

purposefully do bad work on Wednesdays to prove a point.” Even some of the teachers are not on board with getting rid of the late starts. German teacher, Frau Khouri, values her beauty sleep or in other words, “Schönheitsschlaf”. She said, “Das ist die schlechteste Idee, die ich je gehört habe. Meine Schüler sind an späten Starttagen bereits miserabel, ich kann mir nicht vorstellen, wie sie aussehen würden, wenn sie überhaupt keinen späten Start hätten. Schlechte schlechte Idee.“ Students and even some faculty dread the 2019-2020 school year all due to no late starts. It will be a long and sleepless year Seattle Prep, so soak in the late starts in while you can.

school sched POST MALONE ‘21 Staff Writer his 2018-19 school year, there seems to be a shortage of late starts on Wednesdays. This has been alarming to the students at Seattle Prep, sparking rumors around campus that there will not be late starts for the following school year. Last year Prep had 35 late starts, and by the end of this year we will have had 22.

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Although this may be shocking to the student body, Dean of Students, Mr. Stearns, has in fact confirmed that there will be no late starts next year. He said, “The faculty and staff have come to a formal agreement on eliminating late starts for the 2019-2020 school year because we believe that they are pointless and do not serve any purpose to our students or staff other than take away valuable learne ing time.” This shocking change to the

school schedule next year that has upset many students. The reason many people love the late starts is because it allows students to sleep in and be more awake and focused in school. Sophia King ‘21 exe pressed her concern about this change when she said, “When we do not have a late start, I can’t focus, and Ishdakskajdkasfe haewruwefiwe9orjskfhjksdfjkhasdoe fa98fhae4rtbgkasjdfoauertb ijsdahsjfhawerjoisdfnaejwrnkwee

poirpAOPRHJHBSLAPAPAJRENRNRMWK SDJCNEMKLAKNSKDFJSERBTJHI SFJISNJRTIEIOSFINEJRBHWBTEK ;PWOEUJROIHWERNWRJSDFKZF,DM AS,REJKIEJRIJJKPOOOEOWNe WBCKSHYRNJSNKOCJSIWHNRKSte starts on Wednesdays. This has been alarming to the students at See attle Prep, sparking rumors around campus that there will not be late starts for the following school year. Last year Prep kfsaerhwerjpowuae dosajbdfjkasgfuicgsdeuwbrjjkefe hiszchjenjakjhdkjnfjekwrfjsjhfh.


4

PREP LIFE

APRIL 1, 2019

EDITOR: GABI JEAKLE ‘19

Hickey Out, Hendy In As New Prep President

VIJAY-DEEPAK GOPESH ‘20 Staff Writer

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es, that’s right. The beloved Mr. Hickey will make his resignation official on the first of April, leaving the door open for Mr. Hendricks to finally take control of Seattle Prep. “It’s only natural,” explained Hendricks. “I’ve been destined to run this school since the day I first struck terror into the hearts of sophomore collegio students.” Mr. Hickey is finally stepping down after a long term of many years. During his lengthy career, Hickey was loved by every member of Prep for his benevolence and caring personality. “I just felt like he had my true interests at heart,” remarked Rowan Davis ‘21 “From late starts every Wednesday to high-fives in the hallways, I never felt intimidated to greet my school president.” Conversely, Mr. Hendricks believes in a more traditional aepproach to education. “If students high five me in the hallways, what’s next?”, questioned Hendricks. “That’s a slippery slope to a, dare I say, happy schooling environment. Students should go to school in constant fear. But that fear

will keep them in check and make them better students.” Reflecting on his time at Prep, Mr. Hickey had nothing but insightful musings to sum up his time as the head of the school. “To be honest I don’t really know what I spent all my time doing in that secluded little office,” said Hickey. “But one thing is for sure now- I’ll be spending a lot more time in Cabo. For professional purposes of course.” According the to the soon to be president however, Seattle Prep is in need of major reform. “I just don’t see why each JUG sentence shouldn’t be three hours each instead of one,” Hendricks remarked. “This institution has gotten far too soft these days. We should be an institution that prepares its students for the challenges of college.” Hendricks also claims that there will be uniform dress code of polos and slacks for males and females with absolutely no exceptions. “How can we act the part if we don’t dress the part?” wondered Hendricks. Perhaps the biggest change to Prep student’s daily routine will come with Hendrick’s lengthening of each class period. “We lose a lot of valuable class time from that one long, useless block in the middle

Photo: ABBY ARTHUR Mr. Hickey reacts to the news that he will be stepping down and Mr. Hendricks will take over as President of Seattle Prep. of the day,” said Hendricks. “I will soon up- ing Hendrick’s impending presidency. “To date the schedule so that lunch periods are a be honest, I’ve had a few nightmares about more appropriate length of fifteen minutes.” this exact situation before,” said Friedland. There has been a substantial amount “Once this transition takes place, life will of concern from the student body concern- never be the same.”

Mandatory Fifth Year Added for All Prep Students RYAN DAY ‘20 Staff Writer

This year has been one of the least productive in Seattle Prep student history. Continually unmotivated, students have not been working as hard or as much as they have in the past. Time is wasted throughout the school day on trivial matters, like packing up early, taking long bathroom breaks, and having off topic conversations. However, these minutes add up, and it has been recently calculated that over 100 days of school have been wasted in these ways. Therefore, Prep has decided to add a mandatory fifth year of high school, effective immediately. Seniors, alumni, and faculty members have all agreed that this is the best way to make up time for lost education. In fact, a poll taken from Instagram suggests that

100% of seniors are excited to stay at Prep for another year. Maddy Bender, a senior passionate about this new fifth year requirement, spoke out on the matter: “I just wasn’t ready to go to college. Like, what if I don’t like it there? Prep is my home, and I never wanted to leave. Now, I don’t have to!” Other seniors rejoice in the fact that this new fifth year of high school will allow them to put off their c o l l e g e decisions. “Wow,” says Allison Kearney, ‘19. “I don’t have to decide!!! I can’t wait to go through the college application process

“I just don’t understand” -Kellen Carr ‘20

All Are Welcome New Prom Changes Allow Students From All Grade Levels to Attend

AUSTIN MOON ‘19 & ALLY DAWSON ‘19

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Editor-in-Chief & Staff Writer

t’s the most wonderful time of the year. Spring marks the beginning of prom season, an event seniors and juniors look forward to the most, but this year adds a little twist. As Julie Chen from Big Brother always says, “Expect the unexpected,” and that’s exactly what is in store for Seattle Prep. It is no secret that prom is a time for juniors and seniors to finally escape the underclassmen at a dance. However, starting in the 2019-2020 school year, the Seattle Prep ASB and Administrators has decided to include the underclassmen in the prom festivities. Since the students couldn’t say enough great things about their experiences with Homecoming and Tolo, the sophomore and freshman classes came together last Friday and proposed the idea to Mr. Stearns and the ASB, where it won on a unanimous vote. Teachers constantly recognize the feeling of exclusion that falls upon

again. I thought it was the most fun thing I’ve ever done at Prep, next to the JRP, of course.” In the midst of the seniors’ delight, Freshmen, Sophomores, and Juniors are panicking. When they heard the news, they immediately filed for a transfer to various public schools around the city, as well as private schools like Holy Names, Blanchet, and Eastside Catholic. “I just don’t understand,” says Kellen Carr, a junior who decided to transfer. “Why? And how? Honestly, is this even legal?”

the freshman and sophomore classes time each year, so Mr. Richardson shared, “I’m ecstatic that Prep has decided to welcome the youngsters with open arms into the prom scene.” Though this transition to an all school prom may be difficult, the ASB has dedicated their time to making sure everyone feels comfortable and welcomed. To help integrate the underclassmen into the dance, the ASB also announced that there will be a pre-dance dinner with assigned mixed grade seating. The students will be served a small sampling of dino-shaped chicken nuggets, smiley face French fries, carrot sticks, and apple juice. Senior ASB executive Allison Kearney said, “I think this will give students a great opportunity to develop bonds with students of all ages.” Though she will not be there next year for the new prom festivities herself, current senior Grace Behrman expressed “I think this is a crazy wonderful idea. The Prep community is already so tight, but through this mixed class prom we’ll be able to be-

Most underclassmen share Carr’s concern. Mock Trial students have banded together to research the legality of this situation. Other underclassmen have begun to protest, participating in walk outs, marches, and even hosting conventions for students to give speeches. Faculty and alumni predict this panic to sizzle out. They aren’t worried about having to change their new 5-year policy and are already receiving praise from the parents of incoming 8th graders who are thoroughly delighted. There are even signs of underclassmen who agree with the policy: “I mean, I guess there’s a good thing about this,” says Maya Somers, ‘20. “I’ll actually get to use the new athletic facility!”

2020 Vision We see you classes of ‘20, ’21, ‘22, ’23 Chicken Nuggets! Carrot Sticks! Apple Juice! All Ages! Buy your tickets now

come an even closer-knit school than we already are. Becoming better friends with the underclassmen is all I could ask for. I’m so sad I won’t be here to experience it next year.” Even underclassmen are ecstatic about the new decision. Sophomore Derek Hissong said “I’m so excited that this change to Prom will unite this school even more. I really feel as though this is going to help me,

and other underclassmen feel like we really matter here.” Mark your calendars for April 9th, 2020 at 8:07pm because the new all-school Prom is going to be a hit. Tickets are already selling fast so be sure to fill out the jotform here: www.jotform.com/A9CswtbyLMN/////groot.org/hppyaprlfllz/98102/ quesadilla/1776/prom2020/alkghas;lkjge-------------urlhttp


PREP LIFE EDITOR: PAIGE STANLEY ‘21

Prep Goes Plaid

5 APRIL 1, 2019

New Uniform Policy in Place for ‘19-’20 School Year

NATALIE BROWN ‘21 Staff Writer

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laid, polyester skirts, polo shirts and thin sweatshirts. This will be the new image of Prep starting next school year. Students will be required to wear school uniforms starting in August of the 2019-2020 school year. Teachers and administrators approved switching the dress code to the requirement of a school uniform. At the end of semester 1, a staff meeting was held to come to an agreement on this new requirement. Many other members of the staff believe that this will be a positive change for the school because it will create unity, reduce JUGs and distinguish Prep students. These uniforms will consist of the traditional Catholic school dress, similar to what many students wore in elementary school. Many teachers are tired of giving JUG to students who violate the current school dress code. Whether it is ripped jeans, immodest clothing or clothes with holes or tears, teachers are constantly seeing these violations. Dean of Students Mr. Stearns believes, “This will be easier for faculty and staff, as it will create less distraction in the classroom and more focus on what the students are learning.” There has been recent debate on what the uniform will look like. This includes what color the plaid skirts and sweatshirts will be. There are suggestion boxes located in all offices for students to express their preferences. The Prep staff believe that this a good way to make the students feel a part of the switch because they will be able to offer input. Another positive aspect to this switch is that Prep will look more cohesive and easier to spot in a crowd and if students wander from campus. “We will always know if a student is from Prep because of the new uniform,” said Stearns.

Photo: NATALIE NOWAK Panther staff members Cece Brown and Paige Stanley model new uniforms which all Prep students will wear for the 2019-2020 school year. While there are many benefits to this for them. Sophomore Sophie McDowall Stearns believes that Prep implementswitch that will be, many drawbacks have said, “I think it will make my life so much ing this change will most likely cause other been expressed by members of the student easier, I won’t have to choose what to wear school such as Blanchet and Holy Names body. Áine Shimmelman ‘19 believe that each day.” to do the same. Despite petitions and comthe switch, “…takes away from personal Another argument that the Prep fac- plaints, this change will be implemented expression. Clothes are a way to show oth- ulty have used along with this switch is because of the various benefits that it will er’s your personality.” that families will not have to buy as many bring. These include the convenience for Similarly, Bryce Whitney ‘21 shared new clothes for their students, because they faculty and staff to not have to give out JUG that, “Uniforms would be very uncomfort- can wear the same pieces every day. While for student dress code violations and for the able, especially with all the stress that Prep many students have a strong opinion on this cohesiveness and student unity that Prep students experience throughout the year.” switch, seniors reply, “Ha-ha, I’m glad that will present to society. Seattle Prep will be Contrasting to these critiques, many we don’t have to deal with this. Perfect tim- seen as a unified and professional institustudents feel this would be a positive switch ing!” said Bella Metcalf ‘19. tion.

Prep Adopta Nuevo Currículo Black Death Outbreak Linked to Freshmen PWOP Research de Inmersión al Español

WALID CRUZ-VANEGAS ‘20 Staff Writer

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ste ano es un ano loco para la escuela de Seattle Prep. Muchas cambias están llegando a la escuela, especialmente en la categoría de lengua. Durante este ano, la lengua oficial de la escuela es español. Ahora puedo escribir de algo porque muchos de los estudiantes no pueden leer este artículo. Estoy escribiendo el párrafo introductorio del artículo. Este es muy fácil, porque español es mi lengua primer. Soy del país de Colombia. Me gusta comer varios tipos de comida como pollo frito, los panqueques, y a veces como hamburguesas. Si hables inglés, puedes entender la oración anterior. No quiero escribir más en el párrafo introductoria, entonces este es el fin. En esta sección, voy a escribir de cosas locas. Todos los fines de semana, mis amigos y yo íbamos de comprar al restaurante “McDonald’s” y comemos los blue jeans y otra cosa: “moreno moreno”. Es muy popular en el país de África. África no

es un país, y eres estúpido si creíste que es un país. ¡Qué lástima! Cada día cuando volvo de la escuela, la primera cosa que hacer no es mi tarea porque nunca hizo me tarea. Quiero ser un ranchero entonces puedo cocinar mucho. Cada verano mi familia y yo vayamos al Rancho de “Hidden Valley”. Tenemos una otra casa en este lugar. Este cambio cerca la lengua oficial que hablamos en la escuela de Seattle Prep es muy importante, especialmente durante esta sección de la historia de los Estados Unidos. No hay muchas escuelas que hablan otras lenguas de inglés, entonces, Seattle Prep es revolucionario en esta categoría de la cultura. Ahora, la escuela no tiene muchos estudiantes quienes hablan español, cual significa que muchos estudiantes necesitan comenzar a aprender la lengua. No será un proceso muy difícil, porque tenemos maestros de español buenos, como Concha Navarro y Señor Café. Ellos pueden asistir los estudiantes nuevos, y todos quien no hablan español durante el transición.

“Este cambio cerca la lengua oficial que hablamos en la escuela”

HEGGS HOBEDUS ‘22 BILL NYE ‘22 Staff Writers

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ollowing an outbreak of Black Death, which was released inadvertently during Freshman PWOP research, students are being treated for symptoms using essential oils. Essential oils have been declared to be the only cure to the disease. Now Prep too is enforcing that students betreated using essential oils. At Prep now on the first day of every new year, incoming Freshmen will be cleansed with the use of oil vapor graciously donated by the new CDC (Center for Disease Control) branch EOE or Essential Oils Enforcement. Essential oils have been proven time and time again that they are reliable source for maintaining a human’s perfect immune system. When Black Death struck Europe and killed roughly a third of their population, where were vaccines? nowhere. What was the result of this, the Black Death was eradicated. After all doctors came out as being frauds in the last weekend of March, some of their procedures are being questioned for validity. With this truth out that medical school is worthless, as quoted by Doctor William McDum PhD, of Harvard, who

said: “Yeah all we basically do in medical school is throw needles at each other and imagine what the Earth would be like if it was round. Actually, the only qualifications to become a doctor are to have a printer, a laptop and if you can write in handwriting so bad only other doctors can read it.” With these new procedures in place and the oils and herbs stations being installed in every class, health care professionals estimate that by 2020 Seattle Prep will be breaking records with the highest attendance rate in the state and a reduction of Black Death symptoms to a never before reported .01%. All this being supported and humbly paid for by our tuitions and EOE. This EOE treatement is not without controversy however. Many employees of hospitals have renounced the use of essential oils. One of the more prominent of these groups is NAEO or Nurses Against Essential Oils. The NAEO representatives argue that, “Mandatory essential oil policies are to provide more funding and money for the companies who produce these oils. Essential Oil use is just another money train for Big Pharma.”


ARTS

6 APRIL 1, 2019

EDITOR: CHLOE SAHARIC ‘19

Fashion Rundown: Spring’s Hottest Trends

RICHARD MICAHSON ‘20 Staff Writer

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alling all stylish Panthers! Here’s your outline of Spring 2019’s biggest fashion picks. First up- sideways baseball hats. Forget trying to look cool with a backwards dad hat, a sleek baseball hat placed skillfully on the side of one’s head is the easiest way to up the cool factor. However, some people may be more partial to something a little different. Popularized by tween sensation JoJo Siwa, giant hair bows are all the rage in LA, Paris, and Milan. Popular patterns include checkers, rhinestones, and anything glittery. Known style icon, Jack Stoner ’20 is a big fan of the bow trend. “I feel like it’s such an

easy way for me to look like I have a clean, sophisticated outfit.” Next up- mixed animal prints.

“Known style icon, Jack Stoner ’20 is a big fan of the bow trend”

Chee- tah print is a common occurrence in Prep hallways, but it’s time to take it to the next level. Here’s a simple way to try out the trend- cheetah print jeans, a zebra sweater, snakeskin boots, a light fur jacket,

and an animal print bow to top off the look! Finally- Moon Shoes are back! A distant memory of TV commercials advertising these spectacular shoes may be ringing in the back of Prepsters’ minds. Moon Shoes are mini trampolines for each foot! Talk about easy transportation from AMH to Ignatius! Fitted with purple and green Velcro, these babies can take any ordinary outfit from 0 to 10. To wrap up the Spring Trend report- jewelry is thriving! Silly Bandz have made appearances on the wrists on Prep fashionistas in recent weeks. Dig them out of abandoned drawers and show off your shapes! From dinosaurs to money signs to guitars, there is something for everyone! Set the hallways on fire with these trendy picks!

What Your Favorite Collegio Book Says About Your Personality

FREESHA VACADO ‘19 Online Editor

The Chosen You are a traditional Orthodox Jew who lives with your father in a brownstone apartment in Brooklyn. You are an intelligent, conscientious and popular boy, talented in softball, math, and Talmud study. The Odyssey You are the husband of Queen Penelope and father of Prince Telemachus. Though a strong and courageous warrior, you are most renowned for your cunning. You are a favorite of the goddess Athena, who sends you divine aid often, but a bitter enemy of Poseidon, who frustrates your journey at every turn. Julius Caesar You are a great Roman general and senator, recently returned to Rome after a successful military campaign. You are unable to separate your public life from your private life, and you ignore ill omens and threats against your life, believing yourself as eternal as the North Star. Frankenstein You are an eight-foot-tall, hideously ugly creation of Victor Frankenstein. Intelligent and sensitive, you attempt to integrate yourself into human social patterns, but all who see you shun you. Your feeling of abandonment compels you to seek revenge against your creator. Bless Me, Ultima You are an elderly curandera, a healer endowed with the spiritual power of your

ancestors. You are a wise, complex, mysterious character. Your power is often misunderstood and feared by the community. Many people refer to you as a bruja, or witch. You are a firm believer in tolerance and understanding. Canterbury Tales Though you are a seamstress by occupation, you seem to be a professional wife. You have been married five times and had many other affairs in her youth, making you well practiced in the art of love. You are deaf in one ear and have a gap between your front teeth. A Tale Of Two Cities You are an insolent, indifferent, and alcoholic attorney who works with Stryver. You have no real prospects in life and don’t seem to be in pursuit of any. You do, however, love Lucie, and your feelings for her eventually transform you into a man of profound merit. Things Fall Apart You are an influential clan leader. Since early childhood, your embarrassment about your lazy, squandering, and effeminate father has driven you to succeed. Your hard work and prowess in war have earned you a position of high status in your clan, and you attain wealth. Behind The Beautiful Forevers You are called “One-Leg” due to a birth defect that left your leg twisted and unusable, you struggle all your life to find a sense of self-worth after being treated as sub-human. You are ridiculed for your extra-marital af-

fairs, but you cling to these moments of attraction to prove that your life matters at all. Scarlet Letter You had an affair with a Puritan minister named Dimmesdale. You are passionate but also strong, enduring years of shame. You equal both your husband and your lover in your intelligence. Your alienation puts you in the position to make observations about your community. The Things They Carried You are a pacifist and rationalize your participation in Vietnam by concluding that your feelings of obligation toward your family and country are stronger influences than your own politics. You use your ability to tell stories to deal with your guilt and confusion over the atrocities you witnessed in Vietnam Great Gatsby You are a fabulously wealthy young man living in a Gothic mansion in West Egg. You are famous for the lavish parties you throw every Saturday night, but no one knows where you come from, what you do, or how you made your fortune. You were born James Gatz on a farm in North Dakota. Beloved You are the embodied spirit of Sethe’s dead daughter. You are the age the baby would have been had it lived, and you bear the name printed on the baby’s tombstone. You first appear to Sethe soaking wet, as though newly born, and Sethe has the sensation of her water breaking when she sees you.

Mukbang Script MARTY MCFLY ‘20 Social Media Editor

Hey guys! Welcome back to my channel. Today I have a really special video for you! Don’t forget to smash that like button. Tap tap tap tap. Slurp. Gulp. ‘Hello’. Heavy breathing. ‘And welcome to my ASMR Mukbang’ Lips licking. (Pause) (Continued Pause) ‘Let’s dig in’. Papers rustling, bag opening. Strained bite, and quick, forceful break of jerky. ‘Mmmh’. Chew. Chew. Pause. Chew. ‘Let’s move on’. Further rustling on bag. Strained crunch. Lips smacking. ‘Ooh, it’s nice and crunchy’ Snap. Crunch. ‘I’m getting a little parched. Time for some drinks’. Tshhhh. Click. Carbonation ensues. ‘Listen….to the bubbles’. Rapid tapping. Carbonation sounds continue. ‘Now, time for a sip’. Gulp. Gulp. Lips smack. ‘Aaah. So refreshing...nothing beats a crisp (crisp crisp crisp), cool (cool cool cool) drink’. ‘Let me pour you a glass’. Glass clinking...trickling of liquid into cup. Carbonation sounds return. Bubbling continues by mic with sporadic tapping. ‘Now, moving forward’…” (Installment 1 of 37)

To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before Relocates to Prep ZINK TESSA ‘21 Staff Writer

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he hit Netflix original movie, To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before, based on the book by Jenny Han, is relocating their filming location to Seattle Prep for their second movie. Seattle Prep students and faculty couldn’t be more honored and excited for the fabulous Lana Condor and Noah Centineo to roam the halls of Prep. Noah Centineo enthusiast and owner of Instagram page @iluvnoah, Mr. Hendricks, couldn’t believe the news, “Noah Centineo at Prep? You’re joking. That is the best thing I have ever heard in my life! Noah Centineo actually slays.” Prep student, Noah Hansot ’21 says, “so many people tell me I look identical to him. I’m excited to finally meet my doppelganger and fellow Noah.” Despite the outpour of love for the

TATBILB cast, some are disappointed. “I don’t understand the hype. It’s just a movie and they’re just actors. Prep can do better” says Kate Oest-Larsen ’22. Some may ask, how are they going to explain the sudden change of school? Susan Johnson, the director of the film explains that Prep’s environment and campus is a perfect fit for the second movie. The commons, hallways, plaza, and Collegio classrooms will all be featured in the new movie. Starting, June 20th , 2019 the cast and crew of TATBILB will take over Prep, and lucky Summer Prep students might have a chance to meet the cast or see them walking the halls. Director Johnson has also expressed a need for extras for many scenes in the new movie. Students should send a professional headshot, video audition and creative resumé by fax no later than 4:79pm on July 34th if interested.

Photo: GABI JEAKLE Noah Centineo, star of TATBILB spotted on the plaza as part of a scouting trip earlier this year. TATBILB will shoot its sequel on the Prep Campus beginning in June 2019.


SPORTS

7

EDITOR: REESE WITHOUTASPOON ‘20

APRIL 1, 2019

Durand Switches Window Lifting to Yoga Class

MATTHEW McCONAUGHEY ‘20 Staff Writer

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he Seattle Prep Strength and Conditioning program is adding a new weapon to its arsenal. The program will now be adding a Yoga Class at the Window period. The change will take place May 6th. After many requests Durand has decided to make this shift because “These athletes need to be more diverse and flexible, only lifting weights does not give them the flexibility aspect.” While lifting is extremely important for strength sometimes it can lead to more tightness in muscles that need to be able to more freely. The Durand yoga class was in high demand amongst many students as Durand said he would receive around five emails a week requesting to start the class. The

emails would come from all different grade levels and all different genders. When hearing about the switch from lifting to yoga Will Holmes ‘20 was ecstatic “I am super happy Mr. Durand decided add Yoga. I’ve been emailing him every week since I was a sophomore in one of his lifting groups.” Although not all are happy with the switch. The window lifters are frustrated because now they have to find a new group to join. Sophomore Bobby Larson is “Heated. And I’m heated because now I am going to have to find not only a new window class, but a new time to lift.” For some, the window lifting class is the only time they can lift, but Durand is bent on having time for athletes to get and stay flexible. Nothing has been confirmed yet, but as sources have said Coach Durand’s tenure here at Seattle Prep might be coming to a close. This might be his farewell gift to the school. Durand has always put on a fa-

cade of being a “mean tough guy” but deep down, he says: “I really am a softy. Not ev-

eryone sees that side of me, but deep deep deep down I am a softy.”

membered something critical to this case… Mr. Smith hates the Portland Timbers with a passion. I thought to myself, why would someone from Manchester have such an outspoken, vehement hatred for an MLS team? I talked to the men’s soccer team, and they confirmed that he is always talking about how the Timbers are an abomination to MLS soccer. So, with this small piece of information, I re-opened the case. My first order of business was to have a conversation with the suspect, casually bring up the accusation, to see how he reacts. In the cafeteria I told him, jokingly, “I heard some people talking about how you’re from Oregon.” What happened next, was exactly what a guilty man is expected to do. He immediately looked away, choosing to say, in his suspicious Northern-English accent, “Will, your table is dirty, I think you’re going to clean it.” With that decree, he walked away. From that point on, I knew

that this investigation was not going to be easy. I saw what he was doing. Mr. Smith couldn’t crush my spirit. I was prepared to clean thousands of tables, just to expose him. I then went straight to the man that knows every in and out of this school— President Kent Hickey. I knocked on his office door and went in to ask some questions. I was nervous, I had no idea what he knew or how he would react. I was very direct in my questions. I asked him, “Mr. Hickey, is it true that Mr. Smith is from Oregon?” Mr. Hickey immediately responded, he laughed and said, “that is preposterous, what a ridiculous accusation.” I then asked to see a form of identification. Then his tone suddenly changed. He leaned forward, gritted his teeth, and said, “Give up on this. If you keep up this little investigation, it will not go well for you.” With that I left. I didn’t know what to do. I was shocked and a lit-

tle bit scared. This is where weaker people would’ve given up. But I was persistent. With the administration and Mr. Smith onto me, I knew I needed to be stealthier in my inspection. I was ready for a long and tedious investigation. I had no idea what my next move would be. Just when I was almost out of hope, I was given a lifeline, by the grace of God. I was called down to the attendance office two days after my meeting with Mr. Hickey. Mr. Stearns wanted to meet with me. I sat down, and he told me, “Will, I’ve been trying to expose Mr. Smith for the longest time. You must have the courage to speak out.” This journey has been a long and perilous one. I played a high-risk highreward game. I had much to lose, but everything to gain. With this, I issue my declaration: Mr. Smith is from Oregon, not Manchester.

Photo: Mac Donald Coach Durand limbers up prior to his new Window Yoga Class. Durand converted the traditional Window Lifting class to Yoga in order to help students gain flexibility and become more centered.

The Secret Life of Mr. Smith

SIMONE DINNERSTEIN ‘21 Staff Writer

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n Monday, February 25th, 2019, a mysterious white envelope was left at The Panther offices, addressed to “whom it may concern.” The envelope was crisp and a glimmering white, and it left absolutely no trace of who it might’ve been from. Mr. Richardson, the Panther Advisor, decided that he should be the one to open it. Inside was a folded piece of graph paper. When unfolded, in letters cut out of magazines, it read, “Mr. Smith is actually from Oregon. Expose him.” At first Mr. Richardson and the editors of The Panther thought nothing of it. A couple of people gave it some thought but never took it too seriously. And chalking it up to a practical joke, they threw the note into the recycling bin and it was forgotten. Until, on Tuesday, March 5th, I decided to revisit the issue because I re-

Los Angeles Loses 2028 Olympics Bid, Seattle Now Hosting

INIGO MONTOYA ‘19 Staff Writer

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n March 28th, Los Angeles, California, and Olympic Committee officials announced that Los Angeles would no longer be hosting the 2028 Summer Olympics. Due to a variety of factors, that made hosting the games in Los Angeles unfeasible, both the city of Los Angeles and the IOC (International Olympic Committee) have decided to that it would be in the best for the interests of the 2028 Olympiad and the city of Los Angeles that this event be hosted by another city. The factors that ultimately led to the end of these games were, finding venues for the rowing, canoeing and kayaking events, worries about the infamous Los An-

PAIGE NOWAK ‘21 Staff Writer

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geles traffic, and problems with infrastructure. However, the biggest problem that signaled the end of these Olympic Games before they had even started was the failure for the city and state to pass a budget to build the rest of the infrastructure to host these games. Now a new problem faces the Olympic Committee, where will the next Olympics be hosted? The United States government has expressed that if the games cannot be held in Los Angeles it should still be held in another US city. Risk losing the major US market, the IOC decided to narrow its search to US cities that could host the games. After contact and deliberation between the IOC and various city/state governments the IOC found four new finalist

cities for hosting the 2028 Olympics. The final cities were Atlanta, Philadelphia, Chicago, and Seattle. The list was further narrowed when Atlanta and Philadelphia both dropped out of the running due to a lack of interest and because of the short time frame. This left Chicago and Seattle as the final two cities, where Seattle distinguished their plan from Chicago by having a lot of the needed infrastructure in place already and by having a more detailed and thorough budget plan that minimized the cost to the IOC in ways that Chicago could not match. Seattle’s plan to host the Olympic games does not plan to create any additional stadiums. Basketball games will be played at, ‘Hec’ Edmonton Pavilion, the Tacoma

Dome, and the newly renovated Key Arena. The soccer games will be held at Alaska Airlines Stadium, Centurylink Field, Safeco Field, and Memorial Stadium. To the Mariner fans, do not worry, the Mariners will be playing out of the Husky Ball Park from July 21 to September 2. The plans for these Olympic games heavily rely on the University of Washington who came out with a statement supporting these games: “As an institution we look forward to being a major partner with the IOC in promoting the 2028 Olympic Games here in Seattle.” We are excited to expand the Husky brand across not only the state but with the globe, but most of all, Happy April Fools!

Dubicki Siblings Take Prep to the Ice

rep has recently been introducing new sports programs to the school and the newest and upcoming sport is ice hockey! The famous hockey playing sibling duo, Cole ’20 and Reese ’21 Dubicki have been working hard to get a team to Prep. The idea first came to light when Seattle had it’s first day of “snowmagedon.” A single patch of ice covered the plaza of

Seattle Prep. The Dubicki’s took advantage of it and held a full hockey game on the plaza. They then realized that they could take Prep sports to the ice. Reese described it as: “an awakening for Prep sports.” There is a planned full remodel of the gym to accommodate for the new rink. The hardwood will be transformed into a full ice rink during the cold winter months next year. The HEX programs will be moved to activities on the back field for the months of November to March. Maggie Green ’21

was ecstatic when she first heard the news, “I can’t wait for tryouts! I’ve had a pair of skates in my garage for like five years and now I get to use them!” Ms. White will be taking the lead on program with Reese and Cole coaching. Tryouts will be held in early November. Hockey sticks and gear will be sold in the early months of next year at Panther Place, replacing all Prep merchandise. Cole helped design the team jerseys and described them as, “absolutely amazing, they are going to

look so good on the ice.” Because this is so new to Prep, there will be weekly practices for ice skating and stick skills in the summer. Stay tuned for updates on Instagram, @prephockey. Reese can’t wait to lace up her skates in her home rink at Prep. There will be both a girl’s program and a boy’s program. Cole said, “I can’t wait to see all the students at Prep get out there on the ice, it’s gonna be great.” So Prep, go grab your skates!


APRIL 1, 2019

THE FRONT PAGE

8

EDITORS: ALLY DAWSON ‘19 AND FREESHA VACADO ‘19

The Seattle Prep Panther is proud to endorse the following...

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