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11 . 1 6 . 1 8 VOLUME 23 ISSUE 2



Letter from the Editor L

adies and gentlemen, welcome back. The second issue of The Mustang is officially out. People were lining up along street corners in the hopes of getting a copy. Okay, that didn’t happen. But wishful thinking never hurt anyone. Whatever you are actually wishing or hoping for, it is undeniable that a new season is upon us. Maybe for you, it’s Thanksgiving season. Or you may already feel that it is Christmas season (if it is, we need to have a serious talk). However, I am ultimately unconcerned with what holiday season we are pretending it is right now. For me, and for a lot of seniors, it isn’t Thanksgiving season. Or Christmas season. No, no. It’s college application season. But instead of drowning in a sea of selfpity-- which, don’t get me wrong, has its appeal-- I have been trying to figure my life out. Not only do I have to figure it out, but I also have to figure out how to put it to words. Not a fan. I know, this must seem revolutionary. A high school senior complaining about college ap-

ROLL CALL Editor-in-Chief Taylor Rudman Design Editor Simmone Stearn News Editor Aiden Fullwood Opinion Editor Sophie Huges

plications. Alert the media! While, yes, the monotony of the Common App provides complaints sufficient to fill this page, that’s not really what has me troubled. It’s the sort of distorted portrayal of self that comes with it. I find it bizarre to see the people I care about and the memories I’ve shared boiled down to a few activities, 150 characters each. Sunny lunches in the courtyard don’t exactly qualify as an extracurricular (take a peek at special lunch spots on page 12). It feels foreign and strange to define my entire person in one short answer essay. After hours upon hours of work, what do I have to show? The simplest representation of myself. To try and translate a human onto paper seems absurd. It is absurd. Yet, nevertheless, we continue on, attempting to follow inexplicable “tips and tricks” to appear as the best versions of ourselves. But there isn’t a formula for explaining who you are as a person. As frustrating as this process is for me, it can also be pleasing. While trying to condense my life

Cover Artist

into a few pages, I have gotten to look back on all of it. All of the good times. And so while I don’t get to make too many special memories during college application season, I get to relive some of the best ones. If it isn’t college application season for you, and your tears haven’t already blurred the ink on this page, then enjoy your break! Enjoy the holiday season! (Whatever holiday that may be for you.) If you’re in the mood for a laugh, or maybe just a confused grimace, check out the Thanksgiving satire spread on the last pages. If you’re looking forward to that classic Thanksgiving day football game, but maybe don’t want to be physically attacked, take a look at how Fantasy Football works (page 15). And if you genuinely think November 16 is wintertime… well, you and Molly Ford would probably get along. Read her opinion about the holiday season on page 5. Thanks for listening, Taylor Rudman Editor-in-Chief


Artist Anna Miller is a senior here at SDA. To her, art has always been a creative outlet that she uses to make a finished product and feel a sense of accomplishment. With her art, Miller conveys the balance between strength and softness.

Backpage Photographer


Features Editor Sylvia Young Taylor Rudman Arts Editor Linnaea Erisman Humor Editor Sylvia Young Sports Editor Yari Sequeria Photo Editor Jaden Hauptman Business Managers Ally Joelson Online Editor Devlin Ott Online Sports Editor Alexis Price Staff Writers Aeon Benford-Combs Amelia Kaiser Ava Meyer Cade Culbertson Camille Zimmer Drew Atkins Joice He Katie Pruden Lila Schief Madelyn Sequira Maya Hamson Molly Ford Rithika Vighne Savannah Feuling Advisor Tim Roberts The Mustang is the student newspaper of San Dieguito Academy. Advertisements do not necessarily reflect the opinion of the newspaper. The Mustang is an open forum which welcomes letters. Letters can be submitted to room 42, or emailed to sdamustang@gmail.com. San Dieguito Academy Room 42 800 Santa Fe Drive Encinitas, CA 92024

Isaiah Dasher is a freshman and has been taking pictures since he was 10 years old; however, he has taken more interest in it over the last year. He likes photography because of its ability to “freeze moments in time.” Dasher’s favorite subjects to take pictures of are the beach, surfing and sunsets. He said, “I took this sunset picture when my family and I were camping at the Encinitas campground.”


NOV 2018

We need to talk By Aiden Fullwood


uicide prevention specialist Stan Collins told parents and teachers that he hopes when they “walk out of those doors tonight [they’re] gonna be more comfortable, not just educated [talking about suicide]” at Canyon Crest Academy Nov. 7. Discussion of mental health has taken place recently among SDA students after the district released a statement expressing their concern for a student death at CCA, which Principal Adam Camacho addressed during the last forum. Collins began by defining suicide based on his 19 years of experience working with the SDCSPC. “When you reduce suicide down to the two most basic factors, in my opinion, it’s about pain and hope,” Collins said. “The majority of suicides that I see happen are when pain outweighs hope.” According to Collins, that’s why it is necessary to remain positive when talking about suicide to an individual considering it. “When you talk about convincing somebody not to die...you are setting the bar just barely at the survivable level. But when we talk about reasons for living, we are setting the bar way up here,” Collins said. He also stressed the importance of using proper terminology when talking about suicide in order to avoid additional negativity surrounding the subject. “That word ‘committed’ carries with it a very negative connotation...we ask that people use the term ‘died by suicide,’” Collins said. On the slideshow behind him Collins displayed a number of graphs and informational charts, including one that listed potential warning signs of suicidal behavior. Some included: talking about committing suicide, looking for ways, feeling hopeless, isolating oneself, displaying an increase in reckless behavior, and extreme mood swings.. When discussing suicide with somebody demonstrating these behaviors, the most important thing is to be direct, Collins said. The three essential questions are “Are you thinking about suicide,” “Do you have a plan,” and “When is the pain the worst?” Collins also recommended to allow plenty of time to discuss it with the person, avoid yes or no questions, allow him or her to speak freely, and respect the person’s privacy. It a lot harder to ask than we think, Collins said, but “fear is not a reason for us not to do something... it shouldn’t take a tragedy for us to have these conversations. The most important conversations we will ever have about suicide are gonna take place at the dining room table...on a phone call at three in the morning...with family and friends.”



The votes are in... Newly elected school board officials repsond to their wins and students share their reactions to midterm election results. By Cade Culbertson and Aiden Fullwood.

CAMPAIGN SIGNS LINED the corner of Quail Gardens Drive and Encinitas Blvd. Photo By Brandon Rudman.


ncumbent Maureen Muir was returned to the SDUHSD school board alongside two newcomers in the Nov. 6 election, according to unofficial election results. School board candidates talked about their win and San Dieguito Academy students shared their insight on other aspects regarding the midterm election. Muir was elected for the Area 1 chair with 52 percent of votes as opposed to 47.7 percent for Amy Flicker, and Melisse Mossy won with 52.1 percent of voters against Rhea Stewart’s 47.6 percent for Area 3, according to unofficial election results. In Area 5, Gibson won with 42.5 percent of votes while Cheryl JamesWard received 36.7 percent and Lea Wolf 20.45 percent. The Mustang reached out to the three winning school board candidates for their response to the election results. “I attribute my win to parents, students, and community members, knowing that children’s personal achievement, is my number one priority,” Muir said. “I am honored to be chosen for a second term.” Mossy mentioned her gratitude for the friends that volunteered in helping spread the word for her candidacy. She was also appreciative of her opportunities in “attending local school and community activities” walking door to door, and listening “to each individuals concerns and perspectives.” “I am humbly grateful for this privilege to represent our students

and voters and do not take the responsibility or opportunity to serve lightly,” Mossy said. “Being available, sincerely listening, caring, and having a plethora of creative ideas were perhaps the most critical and will remain the most critical components of being effective as a Trustee for our board.” Gibson said she accredits her election to eight years of experience on the Del Mar Union School District board, as well as endorsement by the San Dieguito faculty that “tends to go a long way with parents who may not know much about school district business…” as well as “great opportunities to communicate [her] message at forums…” The candidates will become officially certified on Dec. 6. In addition to school board elections, many students had a variety of opinions to share about their reaction to a variety of races, such as the US Senate, House of Representatives, and ballot measures like Proposition 6.        Proposition 6, which would have repealed last year’s increases to the gas tax in California, did not pass. This was to the joy of some students and to the disapproval of others. Senior Matthew Wilson, who supported the ballot measure, said, “You have to spend a lot of money on gas this day and age because, depending on where you are, cars are like your lifeblood.” He continued, “You’ve got to have a car to get around the larger cities and

in some cases, rural towns, so it is unfortunate that the gas tax wasn’t lowered.” In contrast, other students were glad that it did not pass because of what the tax revenue is supporting. Senior Aaron Altona said, “I feel that the gas tax is important for the maintenance of public roads and other projects.” Senior Fiona O’Brien said, “Honestly, I would have been concerned if the gas tax was repealed because the amount that they would be taking away would be detrimental to the quality of the roads and bridges and all of the safety measures that I count on.” One of the national races that students cared about was for the United States Senate. California, among one of only three states, elects the top two candidates from primaries, regardless of party affiliation. Because of this, the two candidates, incumbent Dianne Feinstein, who won, and Kevin De León, were both part of the Democratic Party. In response to this result, senior Evan Davies said, “I think it was to be expected that Feinstein would win and I am personally very relieved, as De León is quite a character and has a number of policies and opinions that I would not like to see implemented.” Senior Rika Howard, on the other hand, expressed her concerns of having Dianne Feinstein win due to her being in the senate for over two decades. She said, “I kind of just want somebody new honestly. I just

want [candidates] from different backgrounds in power.” Democrat Mike Levin’s election to the House of Representatives was met with varied responses as well and is the first time that the 49th district has fallen under control of democrats for quite some time. O’Brien said, “I’m pretty hyped for Mike Levin winning. I mean I think it’s pretty substantial that the 49th has flipped blue.” However, Davies did not share the view that his election was positive for the country, mainly referring to Levin’s support of universal healthcare. “I think most people expected Levin to win, me included, but I’m still sort of disappointed” he said. “Universal healthcare would, I think, really do a number on the national budget.”      Besides the races held in California, students also expressed their views on the election on a nationwide scale. Beto O’Rourke, who fell only a few points away from flipping the Texas senate seat into Democratic hands, lost. This was to the disappointment of some students as Texas has been known for being safe for republicans and was a very close race. O’Brien said, “I was passionate about Beto. It was very close. It was also quite odd that Texas had an 8 million voter turnout instead of their regular 5 million.”         Howard also added, “I saw a lot of Democrats win and a lot of LGBTQ+ people win, and I was really happy about that.”




NOV 2018

Conspiracy theory: November is fake


In October, spirit is shown with the colors orange and black. In December, green and red. In the month of November, nothing, Coincidence? Maybe.


ts officially past Halloween, and we are diving deep into holiday season. But which one? It seems, to most commercial stores in America, that we must immediately start with the December holidays, like Christmas or Hanukkah, or what have you. These comThat kinda mercial stores are irks correct. We, as our -Molly Ford own great nation, must skip over November because it is a boring month that brings nothing but uncomfortable strange weather that no one knows how to dress for and a holiday founded in an immoral and disgraceful time. We could focus on all the controversy, but pointing attention over to the happy, less disputed time of year, is much more appealing. All across December, times are filled with heartwarming cheesy movies, charming lights, and smiling faces. Included with this package deal is some cheery Christmas music. There are some sweet treats

in there too. You’ve got your candy canes, sugar cookies, eggnog (ew), pomegranate (not related to any specific holiday but are in full bloom around December), and my personal favorite, homemade fudge! Overall, this time fills the general public with a good feeling in their heart and some full bellies. For those worried about Thanksgiving, fret not. Take a moment now to think of what your thankful for. Take that moment and stretch it. Boom. Every moment is for giving thanks. Thanks for reading this. Thanks for being nice. Thanks for trying your hardest. For those stomachs angrily grumbling for the delicacies of Thanksgiving, eat the next month’s holiday food. It’s basically the same thing. For those who might find the festive music annoying, pop in some earbuds, let us festive friends have a good time. For those who can’t stand the

IN GENERAL, WE should really just skip November and make december 60 days. Art by Amelia Kaiser thought of seeing snow-covered and present-shaped do-dads, buy a little holiday guy and imagine his little life in your home. Give him a personality and help him, help you gain a little bit of spirit. The truth is, I love feeling others hype about any time of year. That hype is there for Halloween and for Christmas, but for Thanksgiving?

Not so much. Thanksgiving makes for one big stressful dinner that will eventually just turn into a great big political debate about what should be a straight forward issue, and some relatives knit picking the outfit that you picked out weeks in advance. Christmas, Hanukkah, and all others are times for appreciating the good parts of seeing your rela-

tives. Them being nice, and giving presents!! Presents are so cool. These colorful little wrapped packages of mystery bring great big smiles to faces across the world, and it’s heartwarming to see smiles just a bit larger, or the mental health a little bit stronger. Let’s get the smiles bigger for longer, forget Thanksgiving, turn to December.

Pass the friendship A friendly reminder that we don’t all hate each other.


f you haven’t buckled under the seemingly cosmic-level stress of graduating, you probably aren’t a senior yet. And if you have, join the club. We were told junior year is the hard year, but I guess they forgot We don’t freak to tell us that first in our Jeep, semester senior we enjoy year is 10 percent mutual friends existence and 90 percent stress. -Drew Atkins But regardless of the unexpected pressures of being a senior, I feel that there’s a lot to be thankful for as we share our last year here. College applications suck-there’s no way around that. The excruciating pain of writing supplementals, whatever kind of torture the FAFSA is supposed to be, and feeling like standardized testing is the final judgement of our worth as students all add to our panic. Recently,


however, I’ve grown fond of seeing the silver lining. Though it’s a lot of work, deep down most of us are excited about college, or whatever route we’ve chosen to take. Our future is suddenly more in our hands that it has ever been, and getting to hear about what’s driving people to succeed out of high school is genuinely cool. We’re a school so diverse in interest, people’s post-graduation plans have made me feel even closer to the people around me all along. Who knew that girl in your homeroom wanted to be a cow veterinarian, or who would guess the guy next to you in third also has an interest in political science? Getting to hear what’s makes other students tick this year is something to be thank-

ful for, because without a doubt it has doubled the authenticity of my relationships. Plus, college aside, we are all still seniors. It’s chalking spots at the beginning of the year, and javas, and our final dances. Although the future weighs heavy down upon us, there is so much we should be thankful for. Even if you feel like you’re in that 90 percent stress more than you expected, that 10 percent is still just as sweet. For most of us, we’ve stuck with some people for all four years, or are just meeting some incredible new friends. The senior experience should not be about acceptance paranoia. Instead we should appreciate all the good around us. And I fear that’s what we’re ignoring. It’s almost Thanksgiving, and while I’m sure you don’t need anyone else harping about thankfulness, I’m going to try and convince you anyways. This is our fourth year, and before you know it, time will be up

OTHER THAN KEEPING your spot safe, chalking represents a shared senior experience. Art by Drew Atkins for us at SDA. Take a look around at all the people who’ve made this experience what it was to you. Senior year is full of stress, but it’s the magic from the people around us that really makes it all worth something. So be thankful: give your friends an extra

hug today, or even just smile a little wider when you go off at lunch together this week-- even if it’ll be sad to finish this year, that doesn’t mean the rest of that time should be spent without a smile. Or each other.



A bad case of ignorance Are you into disregarding science? Endangering the lives of your children? Spreading disease? Then you’ve come to the right place for a reality check. Art by Rithika Vighne


ear Anti-Vaxxers, I shouldn’t even need to say this in a society that’s accomplished space travel, refrigeration, and the iPhone, but homeopathic remedies Who’s that over will not cure there? I can’t your child of read. the flu. Or measles. Or Aiden Fullwood polio. The only way to genuinely prevent these diseases and worse is the magic of modern medicine, the ultimate showstopper of science: vaccines. It’s a scary concept to those ignorant of the simple logic behind it, I know. A quick internet search will tell you that each vaccine is made of miniscule amounts of a specific weakened or dead disease-causing germ. These altered germs aren’t powerful enough to make you sick, but instead alert the body to an intruder. The body builds up a tolerance to the intruder, and when the real thing eventually rolls around, it knows how to fight it off and keep

you healthy. Thanks, body. But, you ask, how can injecting my child with the culprit itself possibly help them when my juniper leaves have much more effective healing properties? You’re missing the key points, I say. First of all, you can’t use plants to prevent serious illnesses. That goes without saying. Maybe you can lessen the symptoms, sure, but the disease still festers. Second, ‘weakened’ and ‘dead’ have unmistakable connotations, even in the vaccination world. By definition the vaccinations are highly unlikely to cause damage. What really harms your child is allowing them to contract and suffer through an illness you could have avoided entirely by taking a quick drive down to your local clinic. Walgreen’s, if it’s closer. This misconception that vaccines destroy our bodies is a major concern, particularly with the belief that getting your child immunized will result in autism.

That is a grossly incorrect statement. Autism is a genetic disorder. Vaccines are dead germs. Do you see the correlation here? No? Good, because there is none. There is no possible way for bacteria and viruses to alter your genetic code. In fact, we’ve only been capable of genetic modifications in recent years. Vaccines have existed since 1796. I looked that up too. All personal reasons aside, it’s a matter of public health. I don’t care if you deny vaccinations because you follow outdated religious beliefs, or because they’re a government conspiracy to debilitate your child and steal your money, or because you prefer an “all natural” lifestyle. If outbreaks are to be controlled, then everyone needs to be vaccinated. In fact, the reason that disease epidemics are so uncommon today is because we developed a method of preventing them. You take that away, and all society falls apart. Take Disneyland, for example. The Happiest Place on Earth became severely infected in 2015 when 125 people contracted measles all because of a couple unvaccinated kids, according to the Center for Disease

Control and Prevention. What’s more, by refusing to vaccinate yourself or your child, you recklessly endanger the lives of infants. They’re too young to be vaccinated and rely on “herd immunity” to remain healthy. When the herd isn’t immune, neither are the babies. To put it bluntly, you are a failure as a parent, as a protector, and as an investor in the future of our children. Grow up. Not So Sincerely, Someone Who Cares

Defining gender Gender should not be defined by people who have absolutely no knowledge on the subject.


he Trump Administration’s Department of Health and Human Services (DHHS) plans to redefine gender as a “biological, immutable condition determined by genitalia at birth,” according to a New York Time This is how my story from last brain works - it month. The DHHS wants to doesn’t define gender Maya Hamson “on a biological basis that is clear, grounded in science, objective and administrable,” the story said. The problem with this is that gender is none of those things. According to the New York Times article on the issue, “the narrower definition would be acutely felt in schools and their most visible battlegrounds: locker rooms and bathrooms.” More simply: this af-


fects us. Young girls would be forced to use the boys locker room; men would be forced to use women’s restrooms; non-binary people’s identities would be erased. This plan is part of the Trump Administration’s plan to reverse the progress made by the Obama Administration regarding gender that aggravated many conservatives. Reducing the definition of gender to a binary, biological label entirely ignores something that a majority of scientists agree on: gender is not the same thing as sex. Biological sex is based on a person’s reproductive organs while gender is an identity or role in society. Neither one is binary. Sex, unlike gender, is deter-

mined by biological factors such as hormone levels, reproductive anatomy, and genes. It is assigned to you by a doctor at birth and goes on your birth certificate, but it doesn’t necessarily align with how you feel. In American society we tend to only acknowledge two sexes, male and female, but that is inaccurate. This limited view of sex is incredibly problematic. Claiming that every person’s sex can be placed neatly into the binary box of male or female is scientifically inaccurate. People can be born intersex, or born with primary or secondary sex characteristics that differ than those typically associated with one of the other two sexes . According to an article by Brown University researcher Anne Fausto-Sterling on medical literature from 1955 to 1998, 1 in 100 people are born with bodies that differ from standard male or female. Even if sex was binary and

straightforward, years of research on the subject has led psychologists and biologists alike to agree that gender is not the same thing as sex: it is a role or identity, not a “biological, immutable condition.” A gender role is how a person’s gender fits in the outside world, in society as a whole. A gender identity is how a person feels on the inside; it is what they express themselves as. Gender as a whole is a spectrum. While a majority of people tend to identify as cisgender (meaning their gender matches the sex they were assigned at birth), there are countless different identities. It doesn’t really matter how many genders there are or what they are; what matters is that we all treat other human beings like human beings and that we respect people’s identities. The DHHS’s plan does neither and ignores a large portion of the gender spectrum.

The DHHS’s plan to redefine gender is bad. That’s it - it just sucks. Already over 1600 scientists across the United States have signed a letter opposing the plan. Redefining gender in the intended manner denies years of research done on sex and gender, ignores the entirety of the intersex community, and has the potential to cause serious harm to the millions of people in the United States that do not fit into a binary model. America likes to pride itself on being an accepting and welcoming place, but we are still light years behind other countries. In Argentina, sex-change surgery is a legal right. In India, people have the right to selfidentify without sex reassignment surgery. In America, our government is trying to dehumanize anyone that doesn’t fit into lawmakers’ limited understanding of gender. God bless the land of the free.

NOV 2018


My broken phone repaired my life Having a broken phone that barely works truly opened my eyes to everything that the blue light of electronics made me blind to.


ovember of 2017, almost a phone out and act like a closed-off year ago. My phone fell into road block that is in your way. I the toilet and got quite waternever use my phone as a way to feel damaged. Later that month, a friends more comfortable in an awkward sat on my phone and crushed it, social situation. which caused my phone to have a Originally, I didn’t do these things shattered screen and a slight bend. because I really had no other option. Many But after getting people may used to finding C is for cookie, cookie is for have perceived other ways to me these events wait, I realized as the end of that I could -Amerila Kaiser the world, but spend my free for me, these minutes thinking disasters were and growing as a the biggest person. blessings I have received when Instead of it came to my happiness. Who knew using my phone as a tool to feel that I would find such liberation in a more comfortable, I face any social broken glass and metal box? anxieties I have head-on. And that’s My phone is glitchy and freezes important. All of the time, I see randomly, and a fickle home button people who whip out their phones that doesn’t always work provides while waiting for someone in order only minor annoyances. But the to avoid looking like a loner or a biggest problem with my phone—as loser. For the people who do this, it well as the biggest godsend has is obvious that their phone acts as been the severely damaged battery. a security-blanket that makes you My phone doesn’t work unless it is more confident than you can be in plugged in. It dies at 100 percent the real world. This unfortunate and needs to charge for a long time because this dependence on your before deciding to boot up again. phone has the tendency to hinder But the whole experience and your real-life social skills. roller coaster of having a phone But in some ways, because I have that barely works has been so eyegotten used to interacting with opening and life changing. Because people mainly in-person, I am falling my phone is practically always dead, behind in a new area of socialI am left to be a fully present person. media-skills. In this day and age, If I have to wait for anything in things like Snapchat streaks prove a public place, I just sit there and to be a good way to instigate daily live my life. I’ll talk to people who conversation between people who I maybe don’t know that well, read you might not otherwise talk to. For a book or do some much needed many, they act an excuse to start a thinking and ponder life. conversation with your crush, which I never walk around with my made me realize that so many people

rely on their digital conversations to spark friendships and relationships. I miss out on all of this, but I still appreciate that because I have to work harder in order to create genuine relationships and conversation in real life, I have experienced a lot of personal growth. However, one thing I’ve noticed about people who build the foundation of a relationship off of digital conversations is that they are far less comfortable with each other in real life. You see, typing from behind a phone acts as an impersonal barrier which makes you say ballsier things or transforms you into someone who you aren’t in real life. Making an effort to avoid long conversations by the means of texting and social media has helped me take steps into being a more courageous and present person. Having a broken phone has also helped me find a new hobby: waiting. I have realized the importance and power that lies within the brief moments of time in which you are truly alone with yourself and your own thoughts. These breaks in stimuli and being in a place of observation have helped me to be a clearer and deeper thinker, and in many ways, a better version of myself. Sometimes people ask me why I am such a happy person. It’s because I wait. Waiting leads to thinking, which leads to problemsolving and therefore a lack of problems which equals what? Happiness.        Illustration by Drew Atkins

Free trade is fair trade! Don’t let Washington fool you. The easier and cheaper you can get your favorite stuff, the better.


ello reader! I would like for and commonly owned among us is you to take a look at your evidence of how the mutual benefits phone, take a second to think of free trade has become a reality. about the various intricacies of your Because, believe it or not, the phone. raw materials Maybe from Korea, Help! I’m trapped in you have Denmark, Japan the paper! thought about are then shipped the different to Taiwan to be Aeon Benford-Combs resources that manufactured, went into the which are all production of the shipped back to phone, whether the U.S. to be sold the resources and brought to have to do with your fingertips. the programs that are used to operate Point being, the way we as humans cellular and computer devices, or become advanced economically and the aluminum or plastic parts of the raise our standards of living, is to actual device. maximize both our production of In a world with limited resources, desirable goods, and how effectively a product like this that is so efficient those goods are allocated.


Free trade among producers who voluntarily engage in transactions to better themselves has shown to be the most efficient way of enhancing the lives of people around the world. However, with any proposal come opposition, some claim that it “takes jobs away from Americans” or “we’re buying too much from other countries and selling too little.” What these dangerous assumptions create are policies that are well intended which result poorly. Various methods that are used to control trade like tariffs or duties actually deprive people of the reasonably priced iPhone, or scooter, or what have you. Because there is a tax on goods that are imported, from places like China, less firms are encouraged to

sell in the countries that levied the tariffs so they can earn higher profits. Because of these tariffs, domestic firms are more free to charge a higher price since the pressure from other companies to sell at a cheaper price no longer exists. You may grimace when you see Apple’s price tag for their newest iPhone, but the situation can only get worse if we create obstacles that will make it more expensive for them to produce. This goes for any American business who outsource their production, notable firms like Nike have stated that they will have to raise their prices in order to stay competitive. Even Walmart, a business renowned for their excellent

prices, wrote letters to urge their representatives to think otherwise. Cheap products like cosmetics, electronics and even items for the usage of children are among Walmart’s biggest concerns. Donald Trump, before he was President Trump, has continually stated that Americans are being treated “unfairly” with regards to our trade. When creating trade deals, the primary concern ought to be the everyday consumer’s ability to spend. American families will be restricted to inflated prices and as a result will have to cut down their budget. Is putting a fight to the Chinese really worth making it harder for Americans to spend their money? I don’t think so.



Keep Leucadia funky Leucadia is a charming and loveable place. Adding roundabouts will take away the quintessential beach town feel.


magine a place where the sole purpose of the town is to avoid traffic. That’s no way to live. That’s not somewhere where I would want my future kids and grandkids to grow up. I would want them to grow up in current Encinitas, a beautiful and diverse place. So should you. There is a planned “renovation” of Leucadia called the Leucadia Streetscape that would add roundabouts to reduce congestion and cut through traffic. It will also makes it easier for pedestrians and bikers to get around. At first glance this seems like a good solution to the traffic that has been affecting the community

for years. The plan is to add trees, parking spaces and roundabouts. The Leucadia Streetscape plan has been being designed for a couple of years, and it’s now being put I can wiggle into effect. If my ears! there were no other factors Ava Meyer included this would be a fool-proof plan that could potentially make the community a safer, more local place which is what everyone wants, but that’s not the case. With these things the Encinitas council wants to add, they need space. Some local shops have decided to give up some of their property in order to add more roundabouts. We, as a community are going to be losing our local

unique character. As well as taking away valued property, this process will also add traffic to the five through Encinitas, because it’s taking away the opportunity to drive along the coast. In the past the City Council has made decisions that have had an overall negative effect on the majority of the people. They have taken out valuable places like the amount of parking our local lookouts have. Who says we can trust them now to protect our beloved hometown? I understand there are ways to make Leucadia safer and less touristy, but coming from someone who lives right in the middle of the action, I love the way our small beach town is. Sure it has issues, but they aren’t nearly important enough to add time to the dreadful commutes or making it harder to get around our charasmatic town for parking spaces.

THERE IS PLENTY of room for everything now. On the

streets there is room for cars bikers and pedestrians. Courtesy of Kellie Hinze, director of the Encinitas Streetscape.

Raised by the internet As this new generation of teens and kids begins to form political stances, the internet’s place in their growing up starts to shine through and play a part in the future of politics.


nstagram launched eight years ago when I was in third grade. Having just obtained my first phone, I of course decided to download the fresh and trending app (against my parents’ wishes). And as a naive and impressionable young child I began to explore what I would come Happiness is a to know as the warm bagel. intimidatingly large and madly Savannah persuasive Feuling world of social media. Now at the time, social media was not nearly as developed as it is now, in fact I consider it to be in its early stages even today. However, it still was what it is at its core: a steaming pot of aggressive opinions. From the commonly talked about politics to whether the cereal or the milk should be poured first (obviously the cereal), everyone has something to say. And as it’s carried on progressing, updating to fit the cleaner, more professional look technology is striving for, it’s become more and more divided, as if everyone slowly walked over to one side of a line that defined who they were. The line, bold and splitting, was a political one.


Politics are never a repetitive subject of conversation thanks to our constantly changing world and burgeoning country of pop-culture incorporating president tweets. And of course, the fact that the United States is sharply divided in half like a magician’s assistant on a very bad day. And because of this and the fact that faceto-face political discussions can quickly become very personal and angering, people tend to gather up all of their opinions and take to the internet, where they can say whatever they want to whoever they want without any repercussions or fear of being punched in the face. From Instagram to Snapchat, Twitter to Facebook, hundreds of millions of people share their thoughts on the worldwide goingson everyday. But where did they obtain these thoughts and ideas? And when? Did their parents input certain morals and ideals into their brains during their adolescence? Perhaps some did. But in this world of rapidly developing technology, a great many of us were also raised by

the internet. And we have to decide for ourselves now if we think that is a good or bad thing. Personally, I think it’s ruining us as a country. I want you to imagine a world without social media and the internet for a minute. Seriously, close your eyes and forget your cell phone. Think “That 70’s Show” and “The Breakfast Club.” You are reading this on a piece of paper, right? Many people did have the privilege of seeing the world before it’s current state of technology, but as high school students in 2018, we did not. We’ve been surrounded by it our entire lives and we’ve basically never known life to be any different. Now I could go very in depth about how social media has affected us negatively in general, but for now I want to focus on how it shapes our values and political views. On Instagram, one of the most popular social media platforms in the world, news can be found scattered across your explore page on any given day. This wouldn’t really be a problem if the news that appeared was all true. However, it is sadly far from that. We all know about fake news, right? Yellow journalism? We hear about it all the time, but many people are unaware that they are surrounded by it on social

media. With the current state of technology, anyone can write a fake headline and article with ease. And because so many young people using social media haven’t been taught to question the things they read, they immediately believe the fake news and take a side on it. And this, for obvious reasons, has a negative effect on their developing values and views. This past summer I deleted Instagram for about a month and doing so opened my eyes greatly to the falsity of social media news. On the first day without it, I didn’t notice any changes in myself other than the fact that I had to find something productive to do instead of mindlessly scrolling through meaningless posts. But after a few days, I started to notice the major shifts in my thinking. I started to realize the way social media had persuaded my daily life and that withdrawing myself from it had caused me to reset in a way. It sounds ridiculous and almost sad, but I was starting to really shape my own political views and values for the first time in my life. As time progressed, I continued to discover how I really felt about a lot of things that in the past, people had been telling me how to feel. And when I finally decided to redownload the

enormous social platform, I did it for the right reasons and with a new mindset. Now when I read news/ politics related posts on Instagram, I think more deeply about what I’m reading and I decide for myself how I feel about them. Even without social media, it’s hard to shape your political views and values because of things like school (the majority of SDA tends to lean toward the Democratic party) and the fact that a lot of the people around us are constantly persuading us to think a certain way. Our parents raise us in a way that they think is right and they teach us to think certain things, our current Republican president is not a very good representation of the Republican party as a whole, and we are surrounded by fake news more often than we think. In this constantly changing world, it can be a struggle to truly discover how you feel and what you care about without being influenced by others’ opinions. But if you take the time (and even take a break from social media), it becomes a lot easier. I think it’s important to know what you think and who you are because ultimately, it will affect how strong your sense of self is.

NOV 2018

Nap time. Recess. Webkinz.


A trip down memory lane, back to simpler times when all you needed to worry about was your CardJitsu belt. By Joice He

TOP: The computer game Club Penguin allowed kids to customize a penguin

character and play games. Photo courtesy of Club Penguin. BOTTOM: Wizard 101 is a online multiplayer roleplaying game. Photo courtesy of Wizard 101


he only way to stop the polar bear and the crab from taking over the island is to dance on the edge of the iceberg to try and tip it over. If that makes any sense to you, it’s probably because you were a Club Penguin kid. Back when we still had weekly homework packets and recess, most of us had way more time on our hands than we knew what to do with. Eventually, we found things do to on our own. Just as nineties kids found Game Boys and younger kids have phone apps like Fortnite, the kids of Gen Z discovered the realm of computer games. Each individual experience may vary, but while only some can remember their Minecraft and Pokemon phases, pretty much everyone can recall the glory days of Webkinz and Club Penguin. “I played literally everything I could get my hands on, including but not limited to Poptropica, Club Penguin, Moshi Monsters, and Neopets,” said senior Sam Nichols.


It’s typically an older sibling or a parent who introduces the game to the kid. “My cousin introduced me [to games] and , him being two years older, I just thought it was the coolest the thing,” said junior Samantha Addington. “My dad played Wizard101 and got me into it. I was probably around seven... and [I played] all the knock offs.” From then on, it’s making your very first username and password and learning what the word “verification” means. In addition to being fun and super addicting, computer games were actually one of the first teachers Gen Z kids had – outside of their parents of course. Most likely, a computer game was the first experience you had with the internet. The first thing they taught you when you signed up for an account was that you shouldn’t share your private information online. Then, you learned to save your coins so you could buy things, and to avoid bullies in the chatroom. Then, of course, you learned that in order to get the cool clothes

and items, your parents had to pay some money. “I was definitely a kid to beg my parents for their card so I could get that one cool item,” said Addington, who continued playing Wizard101 past the paywall by getting a membership. “I loved the storyline so much that I also bought the DS games,” said Nichols, who bought both the membership and the spy DS game for Club Penguin. But beyond character customization, computer games could still be enjoyed without paying money. Mass multiplayer games like Moshi Monsters and Webkinz offered cool mini games and taught responsibility by having the player care for their online pet. Puzzle games like Poptropica taught kids about history and Greek mythology without the player even realizing it, and games with storylines like Club Penguin were interesting to take part in because the player became part of the story. “I would play with my brother...

and there would be this competition between each other but there was also something where we would help each other out...and say ‘this is a better strategy to play this game or that game,’” said junior Charlotte Hou. “It’s not fun if you just get stuck, so...” “I was into so many games for so many reasons, but I always fell for the story...Open world builds were always the best,” said Addington. “I loved playing the minigames. Like in Club Penguin, you could go to Lodge and fish for…fish. And if you got to the maximum number of fish you could also get the huge one – the Mullet – and I loved that,” said Nichols. Some of our best childhood memories were brought about by these computer games. “One thing that comes to mind is beating the entirety of Wizard101, at least to the point that had been programmed. It felt like such an accomplishment,” said Addington. “When I was young I really liked Pokemon, and when Moshi

Monsters came out, there was like a knock off Pikachu. I wanted to name it Pika, but I forgot how to spell it. So I named it Pica with a C…which is the name of a disease [laughs] and I realized that the same day but that was the one that I stuck with so it ended up all decked out,” said Nichols. Once age 10 or 11 rolled around, though, we started logging on weekly instead of daily. Then monthly. Then suddenly it’d been three months since the last visit. Nowadays, even the few that remember their old usernames and passwords only log in occasionally for the nostalgia. Those old games might have only lasted during our time in elementary school, but the impact they made on the kids who played them will outlast the games themselves by far. “I couldn’t even tell you the age I that I started,” said Addington. “It feels like [the games] have always just...been there.”



Expires December 20th, 2018 SPECIAL DEAL: 2 slices and a drink for $5 with school ID Mon-Friday (11-3:00 pm)


NOV 2018


Why don’t people read anymore? Consumerism is changing due to our reliance on technology, so stop blaming highschoolers and blame our new society. By Katie Pruden


aise your hand if the last thing you read was required reading for English class. Maybe you didn’t even read it; you just copied your friend’s annotations during homeroom and hoped your teacher wouldn’t notice. You’re just too busy with college apps to bother reading the assigned five chapters of “Crime and Punishment,” which no one wants to read anyway. This is a known fact: teenagers don’t have time. We wake up, go to school, go to sports practice, or volunteer, go home, do homework, go to bed. Rinse and repeat. This constant cycle of work leaves teens with an unfortunately small fraction of free time. According to the American Psychological Association, less than 20 percent of teens have read a book in the past year. This fact makes sense, especially considering that teenagers’ schedules are often over-packed with things like college resumes and extracurriculars that only increase in number every year. “We spread ourselves too thin in this modern society, focusing on too many unimportant things,” said junior David Salzmann. “I personally love talking about books because it’s cool to see the deeper meaning,” continued Salzmann, who is a reader, but barely has the time for it outside of school. Unlike Salzmann, however, some students find that reading is the last thing they would want to do with their free time; this seems to be because of the correlation between books and mandatory reading for school. “Reading takes brain energy and shows don’t. It’s just not relaxing to me,” said junior Kennedy Urcelay because “...it feels like school work.” Students who already have to read in class just don’t find novels outside of class enjoyable. The content of school assigned books is also a contributing factor to the small percentage of teen readers. “The books we have in school are censored I feel like, I want real.


Let’s talk about suicide, let’s talk about sex,” said junior Sophie Williams who feels students should be required to read about relevant topics that people encounter in modern society. Although some would argue, with school assigned books like Kite Runner, the novels we read in class aren’t censored, but rather only focus on certain repeated topics, not touching on relevant things in our lives like social media, etc. But school reading is what most students associate with books in general, so they don’t typically explore other types of books outside of the ones they read in class. That being said, students aren’t to blame for preferring “Grey’s Anatomy” over a book. “It’s because of our new society,” said history teacher, Kerry Koda. “Everything is so easily accessible in society now,” she continued. Shows on the internet are easily accessible via online platforms, something that people think books don’t quite have. So where do teens find books? The answer is there isn’t an as accessible place to find a good book as there is a good show because most students don’t know there are resources like our school overdrive, which is an online library. The issue with separating books from online platforms is that people begin to forget that they can find books as easily as shows on the internet like our overdrive, Amazon, or even book club websites like Hello Sunshine. With an increase of quick access to entertainment, attention spans are going down, which is something most shows just doesn’t require. On the other hand, attention span is arguably the most important thing needed to enjoy a book. This con-

tributes to the fact that people don’t think they have time to read books, when in reality they can’t make the time. Just as most students don’t have the patience to read, perhaps producers don’t have the patience to compete with the fast paced world of the internet. We live under the reign of Netflix, leaving writers who would otherwise write novels to write for shows instead; it’s just what’s more relevant in today’s society. So, writers are being turned to work on widely popular shows like Stranger Things because of the shifting significance of books in society, which only increases revenue for screenwriters and decreases it for authors. And let’s just face it, where the money goes, the people will go. With time, interest, and attention spans going down, both producers and consumers are adapting accordingly. It seems shows have effectively replaced books as the main form of entertainment for teenagers in our new society. Whether this is a good or bad thing is something the individual will have to decide for themselves.




FEATURES BOTTOM LEFT: Two upperclassmen sit in their cars while they eat their food. BOTTOM MIDDLE: Outside the music room a large group of students sit on the ground during their thirty-five minute break from class. TOP LEFT: Several freshmen at the rocks socialize and go on their phones. TOP RIGHT: Three juniors lay on the grass at the softball field and overlook the ocean.

“We eat over next to the rock pile because it’s just fun to climb on the rocks” -’Bella Andrade, freshman

“We can see the ocean, and it’s nice up here. There’s not a lot of people.” - Carolyn Cohn, junior

Where’s your spot? Story by Linnaea Erisman. Photo essay by Jaden Hauptman. Whether lunch is a time to eat, meet up with your friends, or cram for your test next period, everyone at some point finds their spot. These lunch spots are recognizable around campus for where different people with similar interests can meet. Some groups choose places that are unique, some because it’s closest to the food, and some because they sat there by chance freshman year and just never moved. Everyone has a different reason for where they eat lunch. Why did you choose your spot?

“When everyone leaves for hour lunch it’s really quiet and it’s peaceful which is like a great contrast from school.” - Gaby Vonder, senior “I started eating lunch here because my girlfriend kind of dragged me here.” -Asher Goldstein, junior





Halloween is gone, fear is here to stay Students describe their worst fears and stories behind them. AP Psychology teacher James Hrzina breaks it down for us. By Rithika Vighne.


e’ve all grown accustomed to hearing of phobias like arachnophobia, which is the fear of spiders. Claustrophobia? Everyone knows her. But then there are phobias uncommonly heard of, ones that you question the existence of. One such example is erythrophobia, which simply translates to the fear of blushing. Not to mention, anatidaephobia is the weird fear that somewhere, somehow, a duck is watching you. Phobophobia? The fear of having a phobia. Ridiculous as these may seem, they present a real problem to those affected. Phobias can be relentless, irrational fears that people have of certain objects or situations. They can present themselves in several different ways; the fear linked to a specific object, known as a specific phobia, or a fear of humiliation in a public setting, known as a social phobia. In the case of a phobia, the fear is often out of proportion to the potential danger. “It’s totally normal to have fears,” said AP Psychology teacher James Hrzina. “We need to have fears [since] it’s the most basic human emotion and necessary to survival. [Generally], fears are rational, fears are normal, and fears are acceptable. How we express our fears and behave when confronted with this fear is when phobias come in.”


In order for a specific phobia to be diagnosed, one or more objects or situations must be identified as the cause of fear. People with specific phobias often have other anxiety disorders as well, making it difficult to accurately pinpoint the diagnosis. “When people say ‘I have a phobia of spiders,’ they probably don’t have diagnosed arachnophobia, [they’re] probably just afraid of spiders, which is a very normal fear,” said Hrzina. “A person with an irrational fear of spiders, arachnophobia, probably couldn’t even come to school because there could be spiders in the classrooms.” Such phobias can often affect their ability to function in everyday life. “The sound of me chewing sometimes stops me from eating,” said a senior girl who chose to remain anonymous, who has been diagnosed with misophonia, a condition in which negative


emotions, thoughts, and physical reactions are triggered by specific sounds. “It roughly translates to a hatred of sound and it’s pretty common for people to have misophonia to a small degree. For me, some of my triggers include chewing, squishing crunching, popping, [and] scribbling.” People who have phobias often are so overwhelmed by their anxiety that they avoid these situations altogether, attempting to shape their lives around it. “I have special accommodations for testing,” said the senior girl. “Some teachers try to have no food allowed in the class which is helpful. But in general, [students] chewing gum in classes is incredibly distracting and I feel as though I might need to cry or leave the room.” If they are unable to avoid such situations, they may experience a variety of symptoms. “There’s a part of the nervous system called the sympathetic nervous system that kicks into gear, and it’s basically our flight or fight mode,” said Hrzina. “Your pupils dilate to let in more light, your mouth goes dry, heart rate goes up, respiration rate goes up, muscles tense, digestion ceases, stomach constricts, bowels release. All of this is natural and happens automatically as a survival instinct.” For people with a phobia, their work or social relationships can be disrupted in varying degrees of severity. “The worst part of this is thinking that I might come off as annoying...or be called over dramatic,” said the anonymous senior. “Certain situations such as restaurants are really horrible, and I can’t eat with my family anymore. It really affects my relationships with certain people, since [their habits] can annoy me and lead me to completely change my opinion on them.”


The development of a phobia often begins from childhood, sparked by traumatic events or stressful experiences. It’s possible for children to also “learn” a phobia from a parent or household member. In fact, most phobias begin during early childhood. “As humans, we learn through association,” said Hrzina. “Sometimes it happens because of actual experiences. If you got bitten by a spider, and it hurt, and

you remember that experience, you could become afraid of spiders.” A phobia can also form from the power of our imaginations. “When we start to let our imagination run, we often go to a worst case scenario, which is usually not rational,” said Hrzina. “You might imagine up a giant spider, jumping across the room, landing on your face and biting you. This is so not going to happen, but we tend to jump to these irratiational conclusions...There are some people that have a fear of sharks that is so severe that they don’t go into swimming pools. You might think, ‘But it’s a swimming pool, they can’t live in swimming pools!’ But to them, they’re even afraid to close their eyes underwater because they might imagine up a shark in there alongside them. It’s amazing what our mind can do.” “We don’t necessarily have to experience something in order to develop a fear either. We can learn through watching others, like our parents and peers,” said Hrzina. “There’s a general perception of things we should be afraid of. Most people are afraid of sharks, spiders, the dark, clowns. Now that this perception has been created, we tend to believe it too and, as humans, begin to conform.”

and stuff,” said the senior. “So ever since that nice self-defense class, which is supposed to make you feel better about these matters, I’ve been terrified of strangers.” “I really don’t think there’s a name for this, but I have a phobia of other people’s fruit,” said a sophomore. “Don’t get me wrong, I love fruit. But in my experience, fruit that other people offer me is always mushier, warmer, and handled too much and it really grosses me out. Sometimes people eating apples by me makes me squirm a lot, just eating habits of some people gross me out.” One junior boy replied simply, with his biggest fear being, “Girls.”


Several types of therapy can be effective for treating specific and social phobias, including Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and Exposure Therapy. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) teaches the phobic person to discover different ways of understanding and reacting to the phobia and teaches the person to control their feelings and thoughts surrounding the phobia. Exposure therapy introduces gradual exposure to the phobia over a series of steps,

in order to gain control over the phobia, under the guidance of their therapist. “I’ve been going to a therapist, and there are new treatments for misophonia coming out,” said the senior girl. “I’ve been going for a few months, and now I can sometimes eat with my mom if we watch something on the TV at the same time.” However, when therapy is unavailable, “we can try thinking before we act,” said Hrzina. “So when this response kicks in, we can stop and take deep breaths, and stop [to] think, ‘What’s the worst that can happen?’ or ‘Is it really that dangerous?’ to calm our imaginations down.” “Just as a general rule, treat people kindly,” said the anonymous girl. “You don’t know what’s going on their life. And if someone says they have misophonia, or any phobia, please be respectful. For example, chew with your mouth closed and be aware if someone looks uncomfortable by your actions, so you can stop. It’s okay if you forget.” Photo Courtesy of Wikimedia Commons, Fir0002/Flagstaffotos

THE WORST FEARS OF SDA STUDENTS A survey of 40 SDA students described their worst fears, a majority of them sticking to the common fears of public humiliation, snakes, sharks, and death. Understandably, six out of ten seniors mentioned college and life after college being their biggest fear. A junior girl mentioned her fear of magicians. “They are very sneaky, sketchy and untrustworthy,” said the junior. “One time I was in Vegas and I had to leave a magic shop because I felt really claustrophobic and nervous as the magician did tricks, so I literally just sat outside while my family watched. It’s really weird, but magic just really creeps me out.” One senior girl’s fear of strangers and abduction began with an unfortunate experience at a self defense class. “I took a self-defense class when I was really little... and they told a bunch of horror stories of kids getting kidnapped

NOV 2018


LEFT: Spencer Goldstein’s lineup for week three of fantasy


MIDDLE: Gabby Glener’s lineup for the three as well. RIGHT TOP: Off the “field” Glener and Goldstein are great

friends and teammates on the cross country team.

End zone, couch, phone? SDA may not have a football team, but students and staff have spirit for NFL teams, watching football games on the weekends and participating in Fantasy Football. By Alexis Price


he game is fantasy… fantasy football. Fall means football. Not fútbol, but good oldfashion American football. Busting out some soda pops and the Doritos, people across the nation are plopping themselves on the couch for a couple hours on Thursdays, Sundays, and Mondays to watch NFL football or Saturdays for college football. SDA students may not have a local team to root for, but support for the Rams, Chargers, and 49ers has continued. Although fans are always eager to watch the sport, the “oofs” and “eeeks” that come out of their mouths really mean, “thank god that is not me.” People cheer on their favorite teams because they are local, have the coolest mascot, or are the best in the league. However, fans have been taking their opinions from the couch to the computer and mobile devices with one of the most popular applications— fantasy football. Since its launch in 1997, fantasy football has gained popularity; about 33.3 million people play fantasy football every year, 19 million of those in America alone. Fantasy football works by drafting a team of players, just like an actual NFL draft;


however, participants can choose players from any team. During the draft, people pick the best players first, usually those are your offensive players (Example - Quarterback: Tom Brady, Wide Receiver: Odell Beckham Jr., Running Back: Ezekiel Elliot etc.), followed by your defensive players (Example Defensive Tackle: Aaron Donald, Linebacker: Von Miller etc.). People also complete their online profile and create team names which can be as crude, humorous, or as nerdy as wanted. Every week, people play against one another earning points for their players based on how well they perform. At the end of the week, points are added up and a winner is chosen. The winner is determined by how many wins and losses they have, as well as a considering a variety of other factors such as points offensively and defensively, and even ties. At SDA, students are currently playing in leagues of their own with their parents and friends, or in public leagues with people from all around the world. This activity can create lasting memories as the motivation

to beat friends at this virtual form of competition is very real because football is football - meaning leave the intensity of football out of friendly conversations during the normal day. “My favorite part is beating people that are good at it. It makes me happy,” said senior Gabriella Glener who in a league with several other students from SDA including junior Spencer Goldstein and junior Miles Lavake. Some students like Glener have been playing for a few years and choose their players based on their favorite team mascots. Others are rookies to the world of fantasy like Goldstein, who does not even have a favorite team. However, there are the few like Lavake who believe they have mastered the realm of fantasy. “Yeah, I’m in three leagues,” said Llavake. “I always check out how players did the year before and their projections for the coming year to make a great team.” Students are not the only ones at SDA participating in the draft. Social Science teachers James Hrzina and Bob Teisher are currently playing in a fantasy football league together, with

about ten other people. Hrzina researched statistics, scores, and favorite picks over the summer to crush the competition, which really means Teisher. Although Hrzina is relative newbie to the game, with only one year of experience under his belt, that doesn’t stop him from wanting to win. “I’m super super into it. I love the psychology of it because it is grounded in data. I love the number crunching, the statistics, and drawing conclusions,” said Hrzina. “I will literally stare at the numbers and analyze them in my head to try and draw conclusions that this player will have a great game.” Hrzina even researches player information off the field, never choosing a player with a bad character reputation. He is particularly fond of those who use their popularity for good. “I love Brandon Marshall. He is the guy who was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder, and started project 75. I really like him because of what he has done to help raise awareness for mental illness,” said Hrzina “I am rooting for him to

make a comeback.” Teisher has a different strategy. Instead of researching extensively in the preseason, Teisher does his best to strategize while the season is in session. Unfortunately, he was unable to be involved in the draft, resulting in an auto draft for his team. Despite the circumstances, he had one goal in mind— to beat Hrzina. “My favorite part is probably taking a game that would otherwise be garbage and making it interesting. Yeah. Oh no. No, no, no. Let me change my answer,” said Teisher. “Beating Hrzina or trash talking with the people you play with is by far the best part.” Teisher and Hrzina have remained civil since Teisher’s victory, but Hrzina would like to make it clear that he will be coming back next year. To be clear, Teisher only one the single game victory against Hrzina, while Hrzina looks like he will potentially win the league. Regardless of how intense the game gets, kicking it on the couch with some munchies and the boys (and girls) is a great way to spend your Sunday the American way.




NOV 2018

Girls cap stellar season


An exceptional league season finish and Open Division CIF run by girls tennis was one for the SDA record books. It was a season full of memories, challenges, and results they never dreamed of. By Yarisette Sequeira


t the start of the season, SDA’s girls tennis team had a goal: win the Division I CIF championship. However, an 11-0 Avocado East league season evinced the unanticipated possibility of moving from Division I to Open Division, the highest level of CIFs, and created hesitation amongst the team. This possibility became a reality, a few weeks later, when CIF San Diego announced San Dieguito as the number six seed out of eight in the Open Division tournament. The Mustangs surpassed expectations, advancing all the way to the Open Division championship and taking home second place in San Diego County—the first time in the history of the academy that a team made it to Open Division finals. Their story goes back to the 2017 season, when the number one seeded Mustangs fell 13-5 to Cathedral Catholic in the Division I finals. “[Having lost] was upsetting, but it was like motivation to do well this year and since it’s my senior year, leave it all on the court,” said senior Amber Tse. “This year, I really just went all out so I could say that I had no regrets and I think it really paid off.” Due to last season’s CIF loss, many of the Mustangs had their fingers crossed that they would be going to Division I because of their desire to finally win the championship. However, their season record was so high that it became evident, before the end of the season, that they would finish amongst the top eight teams in San Diego and therefore qualify for Open Division. “We were all bummed. We were like ‘oh we’re going to get out the first round,’” said senior Sophie Getty. With nerves stirring, the Mustangs went into the first game


of CIFs against third seed Coronado High School, a team they had lost to the last three times in preseason. A victory over the Coronado Islanders gave confidence and momentum to the Mustangs. “At the end of that game, we were all like ‘we belong here,’” said Getty. Their next challenger was second seed Bishops high school— a vicious battler, according to head coach Joe Tomasi. “The [Bishops] game came down to the very last set, like if those girls won or lost determined if we won or lost the whole thing,” said Getty who found the experience nerve-wracking. “Then, they won it and everybody started crying because everyone was so committed this year to being in open and proving ourselves.” Despite falling to CCA in the Open Division final, the Mustangs were proud to represent SDA at such a high level of play. “Going out there and knowing that we’re doing it for the school as well as setting such a good precedent for how much better SDA athletics are becoming is a dandy fine time. It’s a lot of fun,” said sophomore Lauren Rose. Although the Mustangs are stacked with talented seniors and adept underclassmen, the players did not attribute their achievements to any individual talents. They believed the close-knit culture and team mentality that they developed was the underlying reason for their success. “You know everybody’s together and we’re all just in it as a team. I think it really drives everyone to do better and better when you know that you’re a part of something more,” said Rose. By gathering at school for team lunches, lifting each other up with cheers at matches, and exchang-

ing secret sisters, the Mustangs established a “family environment,” one that Coach Tomasi referred to as “the closet and tightest he has seen in 22 years.” “One of my favorite things,” said Tse, “was when [junior] Kennedy Urcelay started making chicken sounds on the bus to hype us up or just to relax. We also like to sing songs together on the bus rides and always have fun.” During league season, the Mustangs stormed past every competitor. This caused a bit of concern amongst the players who knew the competition at CIF’s would be a big jump. To keep the Mustangs challenged, Tomasi set up matches between high level teams such as 24time CIF Open Division Champion Torrey Pines, who the Mustangs beat twice for the first time in tennis history at SDA. As a top team in the county, the Mustangs advanced to the State Championship which began Nov. 13. Being their first time in the state tournament, the Mustangs were unsure of what to expect. “Honestly, we didn’t think we were even going make it to the finals for the Open Division and the fact that we’re able to go is kind of surreal, honestly. I think we just need to go all out [at state] and just leave it all on the court,” said Tse before the State Tournament. “The girls have put a lot of time in the, in the off season and played and worked on their game and it paid off for them,” said Tomasi. “I mean, in any sport, if you put the time in and go do your other stuff, you know, you’re going to get rewarded and these girls are walking through that right now. They’re being rewarded for their hard, hard work.”

TOP: Sophomore Leko Ritchie takes the serve for SDA. Photo by Kristy Ambrogio. MIDDLE: Freshman Jojo Bear represents SDA on the court. Photo by Kristy Ambrogio. BOTTOM: Girls tennis comes together at the Open Division finals. Photo by Kristy Ambrogio.



about my individual plant’s needs. I carefully select inspirational quotes, poems, and sayings for each plant. It is important to remember that every plant has its own sowwity and should not have its needs grouped with the needs of


WARNING! Side effects may include: brain death, normal death, realizing you have nothing to live for, getting divorced, inexplicable crying...

PLANT 101 Prepare to wet your plants. Story and Illustration by Camille Zimmer.


i, my name is Camille and I have 20 plants in my room. Throughout my career as a plant mom I have never been responsible for a single plant death. Every day I get questions about how I keep them all alive and what my care routine is. Each morning I wake up and immediately start to think about my individual plant’s needs. I carefully select inspirational quotes, poems, and sayings for each plant. It is important to remember that every plant has its own personality and should not have its needs grouped with the needs of others. I whisper

each plant a motivational message to give them hope for the new day. The next step to a happy plant life is to water your plants in a way that’s most natural. Depending on the environment that the plant is acclimated to, I drizzle three to five drops of water onto the plants from three feet away to simulate rain. I then blow down onto the plants to mimic wind. After the watering, I stroke each individual leaf of every plant in order to create a spontaneous and natural bond between me and my plants. This creates a connection that helps the plants know they are in a safe

space and a loving relationship. Once I have to leave my plants, my heart breaks. Tears roll down my face but I immediately capture them in a jar to eliminate waste. As soon as I return home to my plants, I take my collected tears and boil them down to get rid of any salt, and water the plants with my newly de-salted tears. Each night I play classical music and Spanish learning tapes to stimulate growth and to encourage a bilingual lifestyle. If you follow each of these steps very carefully, you too could become a plant mom.


An ultimate guide to the art that is sitting. Story by Molly Ford. Illustration by Lila Scheif


he standard student spends more than five hours in a chair during their average school day. Sometimes, those hours are spent in incredibly uncomfortable chairs provided by their school district. These chairs may cause serious discomfort, increasing the inability to focus. To help resolve these issues, here is a list of which chairs you may or may not want to settle into. First off, the ones to avoidThe kindergartener: This chair is too small on the bottom. One’s tush could slide off of this chair at any moment. The metal arm: this chair is fine, but the arm rest ruins one’s day. The metal bar rests there, waiting, menacingly, to wedge right into your funny bone and leaves the righthanded people practically paralyzed for what can feel like an eternity. Next, featuring an SDA special, the art stools: theses uneven and unstable seats pinch and prod art students and throw them off their funky art mojo. And the worst,: the diarrhea brown foldouts: These chairs have no good features. They are always too cold. They pinch hair. They hit the pressure points in all the wrong


places, and find a way to wedge up into one’s back at just the wrong spot. Now, the chairs to strive forThe blue elementary: Neutral good. The Gen Z children’s bodies have grown into this chair, so we naturally find comfort in what we know. No chair: The floor. Always a valid option. Enough room to spread out, a new perspective and one’s mind is away from all the other stressed-out high-schoolers. Even better if you have a nice wall to lean up against. Rolley chairs: Just plain fun. The padded elementary: A simple step up from the classic blue elementary. Everything we know, plus some added comfort for the booty. The bio stool with the backrest: These chairs give you all advantages, like making you taller, while still supporting a learning, growing, changing mind Next, any chair with arms: at all, any arms on a chair makes it an immediately better chair. All other chairs fall somewhere in between. With this guide, may the rest of your high school sitting experience be just a little ‘butt’ better.

NOV 2018



...buying a civil war rifle off ebay, illegally adopting an albino hedgehog, spontaneous combustion, applying to 38 colleges, heat stroke

Are you secretly the crazy uncle? Only your sign can tell. By Drew Atkins Aries An Aries is the aunt whose kids are doing better than you. As such a competitive and high achieving sign, be thankful for all your achievements… but also go easy on us when you demolish our self-esteem with your children’s college plans. Taurus A Taurus is the grandma who’s making dinner. A sign as thoughtful as you gives us someone to be thankful for this season. When you smother your grandchildren with food they don’t want to eat anymore, we know it’s strictly out of love. Gemini A Gemini is the inseparable pair of cousins. Your sign is effortlessly cool, so be thankful for your natural charm.

Regardless of how close we sit next to you two, it’s a lost cause thinking anyone else would be included in the tightest pair at the dinner table. Cancer A Cancer is the mom who made it all possible. Being emotionally in-tune with yourself is a huge strength, and the rest of us are incredibly thankful for your reliability. Even if getting all the in-laws in town took five years off your life, the smiles make it all worth it. Leo A Leo is the crazy uncle you never see. A social prodigy, those around you are thankful for your knack for keeping us all entertained. As strange as you may be, there’s no denying we’re hopelessly drawn to your radiant energy.

Virgo A Virgo is the older sister you’ll tease for helping out. A signature trait of your sign is an attention for detail, so be thankful you’re more on top of it than the layman. Ignore the mocking, chances are you’ll get double dessert for helping set the table. Libra A Libra is the dads watching football (yes all of them). Your sign thrives in groups, and a talent for creating harmony is something to be thankful for. Even if mom guilts you for not helping out, the unity of the dad corner always prevails. Scorpio A Scorpio is the brother with his

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headphones in all night. It’s not being antisocial, it’s just much needed introspection, and taking that time deserves thanks. Despite the grumblings of the older folk, we know you’re probably having the best time. Sagittarius A Sagittarius is the new baby. Like a little ball of light, everyone around you is thankful for the positive energy you always bring with you. Even if you needed changing, your attempt to say “turkey” was the highlight of the night. Capricorn A Capricorn is the couple that has survived against all odds. There’s not a more loyal sign, so take time to be thankful for the positive relation-

ships that surround you. A perfect unit always brightens the mood, and we know you’ll always keep keeping on. Aquarius An Aquarius is the kooky family friend who always comes for some reason. That individuality makes you exciting to be around, and we’re thankful for your creativity. Whether you were invited or not, Thanksgiving wouldn’t be the same without you. Pisces A Pisces is the all-knowing grandfather. You’re practically clairvoyant, and we’re thankful for your ability to always know how we’re feeling, sometimes even before we know ourselves. Your check-ins from your favorite armchair keeps your happy family grounded.





WARNING! Side effects may include: looking up when your friends say ‘gullible’ is written on the ceiling, speaking in olde english, horse...

You didn’t hear? California is its own country now. John Cena is the face of the California flag and our national motto is “We are at the top now boiz.” Story by Alexis Price and Madelyn Sequeira. Illustration by Madelyn Sequeira.


ov. 6 was this year’s election day; however, no one heard about this secret ballot. Ooh yes, a secret ballot. About what, you may wonder? To vote for whether California would secede from the United States of America. Only celebrities were allowed to vote on this secret ballot… a secret because Morgan Freeman started the movement. This wasn’t part of the proposition advertisements on TV, but the reason for secession started with Trump. The POTUS previously stated that “the United States would be better off if California were to leave the union. Bitter Democrats in California are rigging every election and will be the reason why this country will fall. If California were to stay, we would be invaded by the Chinese spies who would spread Anti-American ideas.” Californians took the initiative and decided to rid themselves of anything associated with Trump, in this case America. The outcome was extremely one-sided, as 90 percent of the votes that came in were pro-secession, while the other 10 percent of Californians opposed. Those votes from the 10 percent were likely from Russians. In the southern states, a spark of outrage has grown immensely since the voting period ended. In Washington D.C. the weather is heat-

ing up, as politicians are voicing their opinions about California’s decision. “Usually, things are great in America. But right now, it’s not so great. I guess we have to build another wall to keep the Mexicans in California out.” - President Donald Trump. “This is a historic day for the United States. Apparently, a house divided will stay divided. There is hope for California now, hopefully Hawaii will get a clue.” - former President Barack Obama. “I think this is a marvelous idea. Trump doesn’t understand the climate change crisis that California needs to fix within our state, so secession is the only option.” – former Governor Jerry Brown. Why did this great state decide to secede? Well, if you didn’t know already, California has the fifth largest economy in the world, bigger than Britain’s. Take that tea-timers. Also, let’s take a moment to remember all of the great characteristics about California. For starters, California has all types of weather - the perfect 70 degree weather of San Diego to the slightly chilled temperatures of San Francisco. And who could forget the world-famous Sierras in Northern California, along with the hundreds of miles of coast connecting us to the beautiful ocean. Utilizing the miles of land in the

Central Valley, California’s agricultural community has increased its reputation by encompassing a variety of fruits and vegetables produced - apples and almonds to olives and pistachios. California also has Hollywood. Yeah that’s right, it’s home to the all the famous celebrities that people wish they could breathe the same air as. From movies to television shows, California contains the production sets and resources used to create the projects most people spend their Friday and Saturday nights watching. And we can’t brush past the fact that California is home to some of the greatest amusement parks. It has Disneyland, the only place where people can geek out about their childhood without being judged. California also has Universal Studios, a place to escape from reality into the world of movie magic. Plus, there’s Harry Potter and that’s literally all you need in life. There’s also Knott’s Berry Farm and Six Flags, which are cool too. Lions, tigers, and bears! Oh my! California has those too! You can find lions, tigers, and bears in the various zoos across the state, as well in national parks (only the bears, don’t go looking for lions in Yosemite silly kid). Don’t forget it also has aquariums filled with many fishies for when the ocean is too daunting to try scuba diving in.

Want an adrenaline rush? Go hike, skydive, parasail… pretty much anything you can think of is possible in California. Shred the slopes or the waves from the mountains to the beach. So why are we bragging about how great California is? Well, why share its resources and goods with anyone else? Let’s just keep it all for ourselves, isn’t that the goal of capitalism?

With our private resources, we can charge ridiculously high prices for anything which will increase the state’s profit so that we can live with lifestyles like Donald Trump. Soon, California will become the ruling elite of the world and that, my friends, is the American Dream. So let’s kick back and watch the money roll in. The California Dream will soon come true for everyone. Thanks Katy Perry.

WHAT YOU MISSED IN THE MIDTERMS An completely unbiased overview of the midterms. No fake news here. By Sylvia Young


he Dems have been talking about their ‘blue wave’ and taking over the House. Don’t they know the President has to actually commit a crime to be impeached? I mean, crimes other than sexual assault, tax evasion, obstruction of justice… Well, anyway, Trump is here to stay. The GOP still has control of the Senate. But let’s take a look at some of the relevant races from the midterms. Our very own 49th district was home to a contentious race between Democrat Mike Levin and Republican Diane Harkey. The Democrats poured a lot of effort into getting Levin elected, and it paid off. But no one has called them out on their greatest flaw — he’s a man! They claim to be “feminists” who support “gender equality” yet they didn’t support the female candidate. It’s


hypocrisy at its finest. The Democrats also tried to get a terrorist elected! They really thought that would work in California’s 50th district, where over 80 percent of residents are white and 45 percent are over 40. Did they think that old white people would look at a 29 year old guy with Hispanic and Palestinian roots and say “that’s our guy”? Maybe they thought that Duncan Hunter’s alleged misuse of over $250,000 in campaign funds would put voters off. Don’t they know that our system is built on innocent until proven guilty (unless there’s person of color whose distantly relative was part of a terrorist attack. Then that guy’s definitely a terrorist. Even if his relative died before he was born. We can’t risk it.) The Dems really thought they had something. They thought that

Beto O’Rourke could beat Ted Cruz in Texas. They talked about Texas being purple. But despite their best efforts, keeping the polling places in Houston and the rest of Harris County open late, Cruz pulled out a win. Of course, that means that we’re gonna have to deal with Ted Cruz for another six years but the GOP won so I guess we’re happy. In Georgia, Democrat Stacey Abrams, who would be the country’s first black female governor, has the audacity to not concede. Something about wanting all the votes to get counted. And I guess some people have a problem with the fact that as Georgia’s Secretary of State, her opponent Republican Brian Kemp is the top elections official. But he is staying strong and has kept his job because it’s his duty. He won’t let the Democrats and their lawsuit intimi-

date him into not doing his job. Oh wait. Looks like he quit, but it was the right thing to do and he’s incredible. But for some reason, Kemp’s heroism didn’t satisfy Dems, so officials will review provisional ballots (the kind voters get when there are administrative errors — like when the Secretary of State removes their names from registration lists because of inactivity). In Florida, the race for governor was especially important, because many believe that the party of the winner will affect how the state votes in the 2020 presidential election. Support from Trump led Republican Ron DeSantis to win. That or the non stop racism surrounding the campaign of Tallahassee mayor, Andrew Gillum. But it couldn’t be that! America isn’t racist anymore and everyone has equal rights. Like the right to get a

recount and another chance at winning. Unfortunately, the only things Democrats are good at are taxing the rich and losing elections. At the end of the day, the Democrats winning the House is actually good for the Republican party. As President Donald Trump said, if the Republicans had a narrow majority in the House, it would be difficult to get everyone to work together. With a Democratic majority, they can do all of the work, and then the GOP can negotiate (read: block -- remember when Obama was president?) So really, the blue wave was a red one. Even when the we lose, we win. The important thing that we can all learn from this election is that in order to win, Republicans must “embrace” Trump. If they don’t they’ll lose and be dead to us. Sorry guys, but we’re not the party of Lincoln anymore.

NOV 2018



...forgetting how to spell, coughing, tears of joy/sadness/anger/confusion, drinking only bulletproof coffee, pressing mysterious buttons


Senior Aeon Combs shares his knowledge about the Upperclassmen Life. What’s your most embarrassing inschool memory? Oh no. Does literally all of middle school count? I guess if you want specifics, one time I had my headphones in super loudly and was screaming XO Tour Llif3 at the top of my lungs to my poor sophomore English class. Kyle, Laurel, if any of you are reading this know that I am sorry you had to put up with me in that class. What SDA tradition are you most proud of? There’s so many to choose from! I would say how most people meet their best friends here and keep in touch with them even after high school;, however that’s just a high

school tradition. I guess I would have to say activities like Homeroom Olympics or assemblies where you can sit with your friends and listen to what’s coming next. Anything that brings us closer to each other is something that’s pretty neat. Where do you see yourself in 10 years? Let me level with you really quickly:, I have no clue what I will do with myself in the future, but I am certainly open to anything that’s available to me. I won’t pretend that I know for a fact that I’m going to earn six figures because I went to X university, because in actuality I don’t know. And that’s completely okay!

If you could create one mandatory course for future seniors, what would it be? I think seniors definitely need a class where we can just chill the heck out. Weekly foot and back massages that are 50 points in Aeries where they are free to work, study or talk and whatever . Let’s call it “AP Relaxation.,” I’ll try to get Stimson to come back and teach it while you guys start a petition, okay? Art by Camille Zimmer

Thank You...





WARNING! Side effects may include: creating a festiveshrine for Benjamin Franklin’s failed attempt to make the turkey the national bird...


The pros and cons of sitting next to your favorite relatives. Story by Molly Ford and Alexis Price. Illustration by Madelyn Sequeira


ing. Ring. You know what time it is… time for the relatives. Oh god! The first wave of relatives come bustling through front door, and what do you know, they are even louder than the last time they visited. Aunt Tilda and your three insane cousins, Kimmy, Kelsey, and Kimberly, that constantly give you a headache, have arrived with the old folks. Grandma Sally following right behind them yelling, “did you put in your hearing aid Joe?” Grandpa Joe shrugs and hollers back, “Yes, I did Sally, but I turned it off after you nagged me the whole way here!” Just when you think it can’t get any worse, the other cousins walk through the door: Jonah and Josephine. Though devilishly cute, these four-year-old twins will do whatever it takes to get what they want, when they want. During all of this commotion, you have quietly locked away yourself away in your bedroom, listening with your ear glued to the crack at the bottom of the door. This pandemonium occurs makes your mom downstairs more aware of your presence, so you are summoned. You knew this moment was coming, but somehow, you’re still not prepared. Coming from big families, we understand the bewilderment that develops instantly inside you when relatives walk through the door. Your place at the Thanksgiving table can and will determine the outcome of your holiday evening. So, where will you sit? To assist with the decision making a pro and con list has been created for each family member that may be present during the feast. So here are some tips for surviving the relatives in general. We won’t charge you for our free advice.

grumbling about the latest political issue with you that has no relevance. You’ve been talking to him/her for 10 minutes, and you are still unable to leave the conversation quietly. Here’s a tip to politely help out the grandparent and get him to shut up - offer him a drink and the appetizers your mom put out. If his/him says “no, I’m watching my cholesterol levels,” say something along the lines of “you

or someone even says a word about politics, oh boy. Ohhhhh boy.

Cringey Cousins

Conversations Older cousins, no need to worry about them - they are chill and just want to hang out on their phones and avoid relatives too. But little cousins, ooof. They are a different story. All they want to do is hang onto your

ever, sometimes you have to just put on an ear to ear smile for mom, and survive those little monsters. Seating Pro ~ Older cousins might not be totally ignorant, unlike your grandparent. Con ~ The younger they are, the more they’ll dab and talk about Team 10 from YouTube, constantly reference old memes, and reply to

All of those extra relatives:

Now, there are the “extra” relatives you have to “enjoy” the presence of even though you have not seen them in five or seven years. Your mom reintroduces you to that one relative and says, “Remember your second cousin twice removed, Jeanie? You met her when you were six years old!” and you politely respond, “Oh yes (but of course you don’t remember). It is great to see you (you could care less).” He/she would reply, “Do you remember me?” You awkwardly respond, “A little,” then sneak away. It’s not your fault that you can’t remember, but well, what can you do. In those situations, it is best to start the conversation lightly and just make it through two minutes of conversation. You will survive. I swear. Pros ~ After a few minutes, awkward conversations will likely stop, so you can eat your dinner in peace. Cons ~ If this relative does not stop talking, it could be a really long dinner.


Conversations You don’t have to worry about them because they are just trying to get through the evening too. Sitting next to them at the table could become an issue. Seating Pro ~ You know what to expect throughout dinner, there are no surprises! Con ~ The expectations are low. Fighting and the general annoyance that is your sibling will constantly distract you.

Controversial Grandparent

Conversations His/her hearing is terrible and both are constantly mumbling and


those conversations don’t last more than a few minutes. However, the moment they ask you what grade you’re in, always say a grade or two lower. Why? To avoid talking about college plans. Even if you are a junior, that topic will be sure to come up, so mess with them and say you’re a sophomore. If your parents are within ear range, then don’t attempt trying to change your grade level because then you’ll get a good slapp’in. Seating Pro ~ Incredibly funny. Really kind. Might take you on a crazy adventure depending on how trashed she gets. She will make the craziest jokes and be completely unpredictable. Con ~ She will be completely unpredictable. Possibly dangerous, but nonetheless, a good time.

only live once grandma/pa. It is what the kids are saying these days.” Seating Pro ~ Grandparents are old, so if you get them to tell a lighthearted and fun story about how they met their spouse, or a time they found a stray dog and took it in, it’ll be a good one! It’ll keep you entertained for all of dinner, and you won’t even feel how incredibly full you are until you are walking out the door. Con~ If it’s not a happy story,

limbs like little monkeys on a banana tree. Don’t get me wrong, it’s adorable for about an hour, but you don’t have as much energy as they do. So, you need to distract them in some way… tip for little cousins - play hide and go seek, but wait to seek for about 20 minutes. If they understand what you are up to, you can always pull the “Oh, sorry! I have to go do some homework, but we can play later” shpeel and hide out in your room for as long as possible. How-

whatever anyone says by screaming “it’s everyday bro” or “OH MY GOD SAMEEEEEE!”

Drunk Aunts

Conversations Aunts are easy to put into the same category, so typically you only have to worry about them one at a time. They ask you about the same topics every time - school, music, sports, theater, and other extracurriculars - so, it isn’t a big deal because

While evaluating the pros and cons, I have discovered two clear winners. Seat yourself in between the Drunk Aunt and Controversial Grandparent. She will spin The Grandparent in a good direction, and if she doesn’t, her loud, kooky demeanor and booming drunk voice will counteract the depressive and angering voice coming from your grandparent. Anyways, we hope these tips helped for those pesky relatives coming your way soon. Have a great turkey day and stay safe out there.

NOV 2018



...buying a large buckle, thinking football doesn’t cause head injuries, thinking stuffing is more than glorified soggy bread, giving thanks

What is your turkey subsitute based on your PTA mom persona? By Sylvia Young and Simmone Stearn


t’s Thanksgiving. Some associate it with food, family, and football. But for PTA Moms, it only means one thing. The best turkey substitute. Turkey is a Thanksgiving classic, but lately dietary fads have left moms turkeyless. For PTA moms, however, creating a turkey substitute is a sport, and they will stop at nothing to be the best. Everyone has a PTA mom alter ego within. Find yours, and you will finally know what to eat on Thanksgiving while still maintaining your gluten free raw paleo diet.

CARRY - white as paper - does what God would’ve wanted - rich lawyer husband. They don’t love each other - attends anger management - PTA president - loves FOX News, hates yoga - drinks Pellegrino out of a wine glass

PATCHOULI - isn’t even a mom - owns “Birkenstocks” - has a rat tail - lives in the bush behind Carry’s house - yoga guru - eats what Mother Nature provides off the ground - Mother Nature doesn’t treat her well

SHANNON - no one loves her - tries too hard to impress the other PTA moms - still eats meat, even in these modern times - all of her joy comes from Pinterest - obsessed with corgis - her only child is an outcast

KEV - not a mom, a dad - barcode artist - his mother, so controlling - wife (Patty) ran away with his twin brother, a QR codist - addicted to baby Aspirin - doesn’t really know how children “work” - has small glasses

VERONICA - divorcee - wears fishnets with stilettos - drives a bright red corvette - I think you’re picking up what we’re putting down - everyone is in love with her - her parents are rich politicians

Smashed cashews molded into the shape of a bite-sized turkey.

A muffin that was thrown at her. It’s pumpkin flavored so it counts as turkey.

An actual turkey. No one will eat it with her, though.

Doesn’t know how to cook. Patty always did the cooking. He’ll just have some baby Aspirin.

Bites off a chunk of her red lipstick. It’s cranberry flavored so it counts as turkey.


This week on Blogging with Debra, a deluded 28-year-old spinster: SO MUCH to be thankful for. SO MUCH. By Shayna Glazer and Taylor Rudman


ey, ladies! Welcome back to my blog. It’s that time of year again. The leaves are changing. There’s a little breeze in the air. Well, ok, I live in Southern California. So I personally haven’t seen the leaves changing or felt any breeze in years. But I’m sure that’s happening somewhere. Because, guess what? Even here on the West Coast, it’s Thanksgiving time. Usually, I spend Thanksgiving with my family. I love our special traditions-- the roasted turkey and stuffing, the canned cranberry sauce, the apple cider. Watching the Macy’s Day Parade with Aunt Betty and Uncle Earl. Uncle Earl spiking his apple cider. Uncle Earl yelling nationalistic, mildly racist things at the TV screen after too much apple cider. Oh, what fond memories! But, I made my transition out here from the East Coast because I wanted a change, and oh boy it’s been amazing… well, for the most part. Of course, me and my man-friend are still together, and he is having Thanksgiving dinner with his family, but I guess he didn’t want to intro-


duce me yet as his “girlfriend.” It’s okay though! No hard feelings here; we definitely, 100% are still HAPPILY together. Since my very serious boyfriend and I have made the mutual decision to spend Thanksgiving apart, I will instead be hosting a “Friendsgiving.” Which is much better. My whole book club is coming! Coincidentally, none of them have family or SOs to spend the holiday with either! Usually, our refreshments are limited to some Dove chocolate and our favorite boxed wine, but not for Friendsgiving. We’re going all out. So, today’s recipe: stuffing. Since I couldn’t bring all my Thanksgiving traditions out here with me (Uncle Earl is on the no-fly list), I will be enjoying a little piece of home with my mom’s stuffing recipe. My friends will be bringing the other Thanksgiving essentials, but since I constantly stuff down my emotions, I figured stuffing a turkey should be one and the same! We need to start by melting at least ¾ a cup of butter in a large pot. Use more, though, if you fancy, keep your recipe unique to you!

Once melted, throw in two large Thanksgiving with Jake, or my go of all my superficial worries and chopped-up celery stalks and half a family. See? Perfect! taking pleasure in the aggressive cup of chopped onion. Keep in mind Now the fun part! Since Pam thrust associated with a good turkey ladies, making stuffing might just be signed up for the responsibility of stuffing. the best part of Thanksgiving! You bringing the turkey, she’s coming Well ladies, that’s pretty much get to cry from the onions and make over early to help me stuff it. It’s apit! Stuffing really isn’t too hard to amazing food while you let your parently super cathartic and a good make. You just take a medley of emotions out. Oh and don’t forget to bonding activity. Right now, nothing unwanted ingredients stir occasionally. sounds better than just and pound them Next it’s important to rememletting together and push e push push them i ber, the key to stuffing is the P n i k my mp carbs. I prefer deep inside until arl’s Puit’s pie needs E e l c n to use good ol’ you can’t feel U r 1h fashioned white them anymore. I bread, but Pam mean, until the . to begin has decided to go turkey is full of er th toge edients aybe ev gluten-free, so we stuffing. Anyall ingr pkin? M m u p 1.) Mix e ally lik in k is the even re p n will be using some ways, I hope e ki n m m u yo u p s an that p 2.) Doe - 1 can kin and special gluteneveryone has a r e pump a lik g u e. ey s up ywher says th pkin an eryone free bread for this Happy Turkey m u - 3/4 c p vite on never in y sauce cinnam recipe. Which is Day! p but they cranberr s , t of st n 1 be ca e a o we hav D fine. Honestly, I’m . is th s n and 3.) Screw - 2 egg et a spoo used to substitutes at here? G ilk e anyw m er p h u d c ving n arou this point. They tend - 1 hanksgi ’s the T deep d e -- that k en a b op n to work great! Someit crack - 1 u times even better than crust need. ie p h is I really d I know the original! Kinda m a e r c ed like how this Friends- whipp giving is going to be a million times more fun than if I had spent this


T H E M U STANG 11.16.18

Profile for The Mustang Newspaper

The Mustang November 2018  

The Mustang November 2018