Prom-a-rama winner steps out Fashion â€” this year's summer dresses Female veterinarians on the rise Military wife â€” how she does it
the Irwin inn
The women behind
Contents ON THE COVER Owners of the Inn at Irwin Gardens Photo by Joel Philippsen
32 Women in fitness series, part 2: Michell Jeffries
Military wife — going the distance
Women veterinarians— a rising breed
june 2010 • she magazine
Sundresses for 2010
editor's note Each year Mother’s Day coincides poorly with the monthly publishing of She. It’s directly in between two issues, making it difficult to create content before or after the important holiday. Ironically, however, Father’s Day is timed perfectly for this month’s She. In light of this, we cannot let this magazine’s geared-towardwomen status keep us from recognizing all the great dads out there. After all, I’ve met several men who are man enough to admit they read the magazine, and it always warms my heart. One such reader is my father (and not because he has to — Ken VanArsdall reads the paper and its inserts daily from front to back). He’s the father of two girls and fulfilled the job beautifully, providing just the right mix of sensitivity and strong male influence. He supported us in everything we pursued and put up with the raging hormone cycles of two teenage girls. Heck, our family pets were even female, so he was always outnumbered. So in honor of Sunday’s holiday: well done, Dad, and happy Father’s Day. View From Mars writer Tim Coriden provides a unique take on the father theme in his column this month on a topic that I think we can all relate to in one way or another. The remainder of the issue, however, gets back to our roots with a profile of the mother-daughter duo behind the Inn at Irwin Gardens, the continuation of our Women in Fitness series and a fashion feature on summer sundresses (which, ironically, we had to photograph on a cloudy day). You’ll also get a glimpse of the fun our 2010 Prom-a-rama contest winner had at last month’s proms. As always, it is my hope that we’ve created another issue of interesting and engaging stories, perfect for a lazy summer afternoon. So, without further ado, I leave you to it. Get reading!
Do you have a comment about a She article or feature? E-mail Kelsey your remark or short personal story that pertains to a topic you read about and we may publish it. It’s all about keeping She your magazine.
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she EDITOR Kelsey DeClue COPY EDITOR Katharine Smith GRAPHIC DESIGNER Stephanie Otte WRITERS Tim Coriden Crystal Henry Shayla Holtkamp Molly Marshall Jennifer Willhite photographerS Kerri Kinker April Knox Joel Philippsen Stock Images Provided by Thinkstock June 16, 2010 She ©2010 All rights reserved. Published monthly by The Republic.
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SHE m a g a z i n e • j u n e 2 0 1 0
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SHE m a g a z i n e â€˘ j u n e 2 0 1 0
...all night By Kelsey DeClue Kelsey Kreps, this year’s Prom-a-rama contest winner, danced the night away at two area proms, Hauser High School’s and the combined Columbus North and East dance. Kreps is a senior at Columbus North High School and the daughter of Bart and Jeri Lynn Kreps. As the 2010 winner, she received credit toward her dress from That Special Touch, hair styling and make-up from Studio B salon, tanning from Sun Kiss and dinner for two from Tre Bicchieri Italian restaurant. The following is a compilation of submitted photos from the magical evenings.
june 2010 • she magazine
Prom-a-rama Winner: KelseyKreps
by kelsey k
Prom-a-rama Winner: KelseyKreps
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SHE m a g a z i n e • j u n e 2 0 1 0
Inn at Irwin Gardens honors the traditions of iconic Columbus
Opposite page: Eve Jackson, left, and daughter Jessica Stevens
By Kelsey DeClue Photos by Joel Philippsen Eve Jackson and Jessica Stevens look right at home in the foyer of the Irwin mansion. The bubbly mother-daughter duo brings a breath of fresh, energized air to the historic Columbus manor, which they opened early this year as the Inn at Irwin Gardens. Along with their husbands, Jim Jackson and Chris Stevens, the women operate a bed-and-breakfast and event space in the longtime homestead of Columbus’ famous Irwin family on Fifth Street downtown. “It was really a perfect storm of sorts,” Jessica said. “It couldn’t have happened if even one part was missing.” Those parts included the family’s interest in starting a business — specifically a bed-and-breakfast, Eve’s family history with Columbus (her father grew up in the town and her great-grandfather was a community leader), Jessica’s and Chris’ love of history and antiques, and Jim’s penchant for handiwork. Eve and Jim serve as the innkeepers, living in an apartment on the north end of the house. Jessica and Chris work “behind the scenes,” Jessica said.
june 2010 • she magazine
Captions for both pictures
“We want people to come here and feel relaxed
and feel like they’re a
part of this house.”
Eve Jackson Top: Jackson makes a breakfast tart. Middle: The W.G. Irwin Bachelor’s Suite. Bottom: The Mrs. Tangeman Garden View Suite.
SHE m a g a z i n e • j u n e 2 0 1 0
“Mom and Dad are in charge of the day-to-day operations, and we are about the big picture.” The Stevenses moved to Columbus seven years ago. Jessica worked previously as a physician’s assistant but now serves as marketing coordinator and events planner at the inn and cares full time for the couple’s four children, ages 8, 6, 4 and 2. Her husband “has the great ideas,” according to Jessica, and was the one who really pushed the family to open the B&B. “It’s just tough to pull that trigger, you know,” Jessica said. “But we did it, and we realize it’s a risk, just like any business, but we realize it’s our way of giving back to the Columbus community.” Eve enjoys entertaining guests, cooking the full breakfast that comes with each stay and gardening on the grounds, thanks to some help from former gardeners for the property, Helmut Meng and Jack Schmeckebier. “They’re my mentors,” Eve said. Jim takes care of the finances, reservations and daily maintenance. Jessica selected the bed and bath linens for the five rooms in the inn, which all differ. Each is named after a member of the Irwin-Sweeney-Miller family. Guests can choose from Mrs. Tangeman’s Garden View Suite, the W.G. Irwin Bachelor’s Suite, the J.I. and Xenia Miller Suite, the Elsie Sweeney Room or the Joseph Ireland Irwin Room. “We want people to come here and feel relaxed and feel like they’re a part of this house,” Eve said. Most of the furnishings in the guest rooms and main living space, including thousands of books left behind, are family pieces that the Stevenses and Jacksons purchased when they bought the estate from heir Will Miller. “This is such wonderful, rich history for the community, and we want to help promote that,” Eve said. “And in turn, the community has been so great to us.” Their business venture has brought the already tightly knit family even closer. “You hear such horror stories about families that go into business together, but we said we would always put our relationship first,” Eve said.
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“It’s a true Columbus experience.”
She and Jessica make sure they focus on supporting each other and communicating. “We have a very close relationship, and we remember to always respect each other,” Jessica said. In addition to the daily operations of the bed-andbreakfast, the Inn at Irwin Gardens is slowly becoming a favored space for community events, meetings and weddings, such as the Mother’s Day weekend high tea fundraiser for the Book Buddies program. One Body One Soul, a massage and wellness studio operated by Tamera Pauli, has moved into the gardener’s lodge on the inn property. “What a great partnership there,” Jessica said. “I just think, this is exactly the type of place I would want to stay if I was on a vacation or weekend away. You’re surrounded by such history with all the amenities and pampering opportunities you could want or need.
Top: The J.I. and Xenia Miller Suite. Above: The Elsie Sweeney Room.
“It’s a true Columbus experience.”
SHE m a g a z i n e • j u n e 2 0 1 0
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America’s favorite birth control method Carla K. Johnson turns 50. ByAssociated Press didn’t see contraceptives as part of their job — in the birth control picture. But some things haven’t changed. Now as then, a male birth control pill is still on the drawing board. “There’s a joke in this field that a male pill is always five to seven years away from the market, and that’s what people have been saying since 1960,” said Andrea Tone, a history professor at Montreal’s McGill Unitos Associated Press pho versity and author of “Devices and Desires: for A History of Contraception in America.” e a Senate committee for be als pe ap r ge San Margaret In this 1934 file photo, The pill is America’s favorite form of reversible birth islation. leg l tro con th bir l era fed control. (Sterilization is the leader overall.) Nearly a third of women who want to prevent unwanted pregnancies use it. “In 2008, Americans spent more than $3.5 billion on birth control pills,” Tone said, “and we’ve gone from the one pill to 40 different brands.” Take your pick of pills There are Yaz, Yasmin, Seasonale, Seasonique and Lybrel — all with slightly different packaging, formulations and selling points. Lybrel is the first pill designed to eliminate menstrual periods entirely, although gynecologists say any generic can do the same thing if you skip the placebo and take the active pill every day. In the 1960s, anthropologist Ashley Montagu thought the birth control pill was as important as the discovery of fire. Turns out it wasn’t the answer to overpopulation, war and poverty, as some of its early advocates had hoped. Nor did it universally save marriages. “Married couples could have happier sex with more “Our own ideas of morality had nothing to do with the freedom and less fear. The divorce rate might go down case,” said John Harvey of the Food and Drug Adminisand there would be no more unwanted pregnancies,” tration in 1960. said Elaine Tyler May, a University of Minnesota history The pill was safe, in other words. Don’t blame us if you professor who wrote “America and the Pill. think it’s wicked. “None of those things happened, not the optimistic May was the 50th anniversary of that provocative anhopes or the pessimistic fears of sexual anarchy,” she nouncement that introduced to the world what is now said. widely acknowledged as one of the most important inAnd it didn’t eliminate all unwanted pregnancies eiventions of the last century. ther. Nearly half of all pregnancies to U.S. women are The world has changed, but it’s debatable what part the unintended and nearly half of those end in abortion, acbirth control pill played. Some experts think it gets too cording to the Guttmacher Institute, which has gathered much credit or blame for the sexual revolution. After all, data on abortions for years. sex outside of marriage wasn’t new in 1960. The pill is often associated with the women’s movement The pill definitely changed sex though, giving women of the 1970s. But the two feminists behind the pill, the more control over their fertility than they’d ever had beones who provided the intellectual spark and the finanfore and permanently putting doctors — who previously cial backing, were born a century earlier, in the 1870s.
CHICAGO — A world without “the pill” is unimaginable to many young women who now use it to treat acne, skip periods, improve mood and, of course, prevent pregnancy. They might be surprised to learn that U.S. officials announcing approval of the world’s first oral contraceptive were uncomfortable.
SHE m a g a z i n e • j u n e 2 0 1 0
was married. Her mother wouldn’t have approved. Pioneer for the cause “The only conversations about sex I remember As suffragists worked for the vote, renowned birth with my mother were ‘not to.’ I remember warnings control pioneer Margaret Sanger distributed pamabout tongue kissing. She didn’t do that until she was phlets with contraceptive advice and dreamed of a engaged,” Elson said. magic pill to prevent pregnancy. Many parents now discuss birth Her grandson, Alex Sanger, now control with their unmarried daughchairman of the International Planned ters and sons. They also may discuss Parenthood Council, remembers playcondoms to prevent disease, including catch as a boy with his famous ing AIDS. The greatest fear associgrandmother and eating her firehouseated with unprotected sex for young spicy food. people is no longer pregnancy, it’s se“My grandmother had the idea for the rious sexually transmitted disease. pill back in 1912 when she was working Another change is advertising. on the lower East Side of New York,” Women now in their 20s have seen Alex Sanger said. “She saw women reads for the pill nearly their entire sorting to back alley, illegal abortions. One too many of these women died in The pill as it appeared in 1979. lives. The first magazine ads for the pill ran in 1992. Now TV ads show her arms and she said ‘Enough.’ smiling women liberated by the ability to limit or Katharine McCormick, a philanthropist with a even eliminate their menstrual periods. science degree from the Massachusetts Institute of The pill is so ubiquitous that young women may Technology, bankrolled the work of Gregory Pincus, have trouble learning about other options. Tone said the man Sanger convinced to develop the pill. “It was one doctor said he didn’t remember how to fit a diamy grandmother’s idea and Katharine McCormick’s phragm, a flexible shield that covers the cervix. The money,” Alex Sanger said. pill is so highly marketed that other Ironically, when health hazards of methods, like implants and IUDs, the early pill arose — high levels of aren’t clearly understood by young hormones caused blood clots in some women. women — young feminists protested “We’ve got choices, but the informathat men had invented it and turned tion about them isn’t always well balwomen into unwitting guinea pigs. anced,” said Judy Norsigian, executive The FDA’s response to the hazards of director of Our Bodies Ourselves, the the pill led to greater access to safety nonprofit organization that publishinformation for patients, another lesses the long-standing women’s health appreciated part of the pill’s legacy. guide of the same name. Today’s pill, with much lower doses Female doctors use IUDs twice as of hormones, is much safer than the frequently as the general population pill of 50 years ago. And it may even be of women and many recommend it good for you. to their patients. “The health benefits are tremendous,” Others hold out hope for a breaksaid Dr. Melissa Gilliam, chief of family through in male-centered birth Newer pill containers are planning contraceptive research at the control. An oral drug called miglusdesigned to resemble a University of Chicago Medical Center. tat worked in mice, but not in men. makeup compact. “It decreases the risk of ovarian cancer Researchers are recruiting men for and uterine cancer. If we called it ‘the studies of a hormonal gel to suppress sperm produccancer-preventing pill,’ it would have far better traction. tion. It’s a real success story.” “The question is will a single company decide to The pill divided mothers and daughters in its early take this to market, to get FDA clearance, a very exdays. Married women had clamored for it as soon pensive undertaking, when it’s hard to predict how as it went on the market — within two years of its commercially viable a male pill would be,” Tone said. approval, more than a million women were taking As much as women would like men to be equal partit. But that didn’t mean they wanted their unmarried ners in preventing pregnancy, “women at the same daughters to have it. time feel a little bit nervous entrusting men to take a “I talk to my daughter about the pill a lot more than pill or be on a patch.” I talked to my mother about the pill,” said Jean Elson, After all these years, a male equivalent to the birth a sociologist and expert on women’s health at the control pill is still five to seven years away. University of New Hampshire. Elson secretly started taking the pill in college in the late 1960s before she june 2010 • she magazine
make the summer scene
Compiled by Kelsey DeClue Just like its cousins — the black pencil skirt, the great pair of jeans and that perfectly fitting white button-up blouse — the summer sundress has marked itself a staple of every gal’s wardrobe. Sure the styles and fits change from year to year and woman to woman, but nothing beats the comfort and dependability. Sundresses are great for everything from a lazy afternoon to a rooftop party under the stars. According to Paula Eller, this season’s top styles include a throwback, a classic and something new. Our throwback comes in the form of a 1970s’ tube dress. “This dress is strapless and form-fitting around the bust area but falls loosely at the rib cage,” Eller said. “This style wears well on most body types. It’s extremely comfortable and perfect after a day at the beach.”
SHE m a g a z i n e • j u n e 2 0 1 0
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s Kerri Muldoon models a brown and white tube dress and white jeweled sandals from Bass.
Muldoon in a navy polo dress and plaid belt with a clutch and leather buckle sandals from Bass.
Stephanie Heiney models a halter dress from Guess and a beaded bracelet from Bass.
SHE m a g a z i n e â€˘ M a y 2 0 1 0
s Stephanie in a tank dress from Aeropostale with a raspberry pink tote and flat sandals.
May 2010 â€˘ she magazine
The classic halter remains a popular choice because it can be dressed up or down. For more formal occasions, such as cocktail parties or work events, Eller suggested the sheath dress. “This form-fitting style doesn’t don embellishments or bows, but rather makes its statement through color, fabric and accessories,” she said. “Add a cardigan for the office or a shawl for that special occasion. This style fits perfectly on a slender or slightly curvaceous frame.” Last but not least, a newcomer to the sundress scene is the tank dress, also referred to as the cabana dress. It’s perhaps the most casual option. “Whether it’s a cotton blend or a jersey knit, you’ll find it from solids to stripes, plaids to polka dots,” Eller said. “It’s a more casual look and is perfect with a cami underneath or a denim jacket over the top.” All the styles shown are available at Edinburgh Premium Outlets.
Stephanie in a classic black dress with side tie and pearl necklace from Ann Taylor and Nine West heels.
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part of daily schedule By Molly Marshall
Hectic schedules can be tough on family dinnertime. Rushing to work, school, sports practices, games and lessons, and still finding time for homework and friends, make it tempting to drive through the fast-food line. But bringing balance back into busy evenings is worth the effort. Food, nutrition and eating techniques are among the most important things parents can share with their children. Parents’ food choices and lifestyle habits help shape children’s food decisions and behavior. Eating meals together provides the opportunity to help children develop a healthy attitude toward food and enables parents to serve as role models, to introduce new foods and to establish a regular meal schedule. This is important because we know that when mealtimes aren’t regular or meals are missed, children tend to snack more heavily throughout the day and are less hungry at mealtime. In addition to increasing family unity and providing a chance to eat and talk together, family mealtimes offer other advantages. Children who eat regular family meals have improved nutrition, healthier weights and enhanced academic success. With this impressive list of benefits, it is worth making the time and effort to enjoy more meals together each week. Look for easy ways to add just one family meal to the schedule. If evenings seem too hectic, set aside time for a weekend breakfast or lunch. For some families, breakfast is an easier time to eat together. This ensures all family members eat the most important meal of the day. These tips can help your family get a tasty, nutritious dinner on the table quickly and easily:
• Have a week’s worth of menus ready.
Plan the week’s menus with several kid-tested and parent-approved main dishes. Do your grocery shopping for the week so you have all supplies on hand. Once you have the main entree, e.g., whole grain spaghetti and marinara sauce, all you need to do is add a vegetable or two and some fruit to complete the meal.
• Stock your kitchen.
Keep your pantry stocked with staple items such as beans, whole grain pasta, tuna, eggs, canned tomatoes, canned fruits and frozen vegetables. Add in-season produce items to round out the meal.
• Prepare multiple batches of main ingredients.
If you are cooking ground beef, it is just as easy to cook a double or triple batch that can be frozen and reheated for tacos or soup during a busy weeknight.
• Get the whole family involved.
Even young children like to be involved in the planning of the meals, so have them plan a menu of their favorites. Children are more likely to eat what is served if they play a part in making it. Setting the table, mixing vegetables in a salad, stirring cold foods and clearing the dishes afterward help kids feel involved. Make the most of family mealtime. Family meals don’t need to be complicated or time-consuming; the key is sitting down and eating a meal together. Molly Marshall is a registered dietitian at Columbus Regional Hospital and works with Healthy Communities’ Reach program. june 2010 • she magazine
Pet vets Women doggedly pursue careers of caring for patients who donâ€™t have a say
By Crystal Henry Photos by Joel Philippsen Not so long ago, a call to the veterinarian usually meant a horse with a broken leg or a cow that needed help calving. Veterinary medicine was a hard-labor job in a maledominated field. But according to the American Veterinary Medical Association Web site, a major shift has occurred, and last year the number of female vets surpassed the number of male vets.
Columbus’ female-run Athens Animal Clinic represents the changing times. Growing up on a dairy farm three miles west of Hope, Dr. Brooke Case knew she wanted to be a veterinarian. She once convinced her mother to let an injured chicken inside the house. Under her care, the chicken became so docile that it would sit and watch television with the family. She now runs Athens Animal Clinic, and while she said most vets will say that they chose the profession because of their love of animals, Case thought it was “pretty cool” that vets could figure out what was wrong with an animal without talking to them. She knew she wanted to do something in the medical field, and the communication challenge really piqued her interest in veterinary medicine. She decided in seventh grade to pursue that career, and in high school she volunteered with a vet she knew from the farm. Although Case was set in her goals, her dreams were planted in a male-dominated field. Her high school guidance counselor told her she should just do some sort of office work. But Case said her mind was already made up. She was accepted to vet school at Purdue University in the fall of 1982. Case’s associate, Stacey Shore, had a different experience. She also attended veterinary school at
Top: Dr. Brooke Case checks the heartbeat of a tiny patient in one of the exam rooms at Athens. Above: Dr. Stacey Shore bandages the leg of Roxy, a Chihuahua.
SHE m a g a z i n e • j u n e 2 0 1 0
Purdue, graduating in 1989. She didn’t meet the same resistance as Case. Her class was the first with an even ratio of women to men. Even so, after graduation she felt as if she had to prove herself more than the men. She worked at several veterinary offices and clinics in the Indianapolis area and later met Case while doing relief work. When Case said she was looking to hire a vet, Shore jumped at the chance. “I wanted to be a vet ever since I was a little kid,” Shore said. “I never wanted to be anything else.” She said now for the most part people just accept that she is the vet because of her friendly demeanor and bond with the animals. A changing field Case said because she wasn’t keen on working with people she thought being a vet would be perfect since she would be working with animals. But early in her career, she found this was not the case. “Veterinarian is not an animal profession,” she said. “It is a people profession.” Case said she soon found that the secret to working with animals is communicating with their owners. “In all honesty I wasn’t a people person,” she said. “But now I feel like I am. I’ve grown, and that’s actually the part I enjoy most.” Case was originally interested in large animal care, but as time went on and she had a family, that part
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of her practice was phased out. Large animal care demanded a lot of latenight work that cut into her family time. In addition to the odd hours, the physical demands of large animal care also presented a challenge, but it was one that Case met. Once, when she was six months pregnant, she had to deliver a calf that was breech, and she said the farmer was more worried about her than he was the cow. A breech calf has to be pushed back into the mother and turned around by hand. Case reached in and pulled it one leg at a time into the birth canal and then out into the world. “The farmer kept saying, ‘Are you OK? Are you OK? Are you OK?’” she said. Case said when she first started working at Athens with the male veterinarian at the practice, some of the clients were skeptical when she responded to a call. Another older farmer had a calf that needed a cesarean delivery, and when she responded to the call he said he
only wanted the male vet. He was adamant, and Case said he basically told her, “This cow’s going to die if you do this.” However, she performed the operation, saved the cow and the calf, and from then on the farmer requested her as his primary vet. Small animal care allows her to work more stable office hours during the
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If you are suffering from hearing loss, it may seem that nobody listens to what you have to say. Family and friends often focus on how your hearing loss negatively impacts their life. For example, they complain about things like: you are constantly asking them to repeat themselves, you set the television or radio volume too loud for their comfort level, or when you are in groups with them you often seem distracted or distant from the conversation.
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www.GRINDSTONECHARLEYS.com SHE m a g a z i n e • j u n e 2 0 1 0
“You can’t be all to everyone,” she said. When her children were younger and her husband was on call with the Indiana Department of Transportation, she would take them on emergency calls. “I’d tell the client, ‘You watch my kid. I’ll fix your dog,’” she said. Case said as a result of her demanding career, her children are self-sufficient and independent, but the family is very close. She said they still take vacations together, and the children actually want to go along. “We must’ve done something right,” she said. Demand creates supply Case said one reason the field of veterinary medicine is seeing more women might be that there has been a shift from large animal and livestock care to small animal care. She said it’s not that some women don’t choose large animal care, but there are just more small animal vets in general now than there used to be.
june 2010 • she magazine
Because of the economy, many farmers have taken on veterinary responsibilities like administering vaccinations. She said in Columbus, where there aren’t huge livestock production facilities and there are smaller herds, vets are usually only called in for emergency situations. Case explained the difficulty in keeping up a steady business in an area like that and said it would be almost impossible to make a living as a large animal vet. Instead, some vets specialize in an area of expertise and travel to different areas in need. Shore said she, too, had to find a balance as a vet. She believes that women have success in the field because of their compassion. As animals become more like family members, owners are demanding a more personal approach to their care. She said veterinary medicine used to be a clinical profession with a black-and-white approach to finding the problem and solution. Now, she said, owners want someone who will connect with their animals because they are like their babies.
Shore said it’s not that men aren’t empathetic, but typically women tend to be a little more compassionate. Both women said they love working with animals, but their favorite part of the job is the people. “The bond that people have with their animals is so tremendous and so precious,” Shore said.
Building toward By Kelsey DeClue Photos by Joel Philippsen and Kerri Kinker Michell Jeffries fell in love with bodybuilding at age 10. “It was what enabled me to deal with a lot of stuff,” she said. “Growing up is hard.” And her path was a difficult one. Her family had little money, and she spent most of her childhood without her biological father. “We grew up really rough, and that was what led me to bodybuilding,” she said. “It was mine, and I was good at it.” Jeffries’ then-stepfather and now trainer, Dale White, a former bodybuilder, guided her through the sport. He set up a gym with weight-training equipment in an old garage on her property and taught her the basics.
a healthier body Michell Jeffries
returns to childhood love of weight training
When Jeffries was age 15 to 22 her family owned Gold’s Gym, and she worked in and eventually managed the business. By age 20, she was ready to compete professionally. That is until life got in the way. The Columbus resident got married, had children and starting gaining weight after the birth of her second child. “I did a pretty good job of staying fit after my first child,” Jeffries said. “I would take her with me to the gym and ride the bike for 45 minutes after hours. She’d just sit there in her little seat and watch the wheel go around and around.” Then the stresses and responsibilities of daily life took over, and Jeffries veered off course. “At my heaviest, I was 260 pounds. I was miserable,” she said. She remembers driving home one night crying because she no longer felt like herself. After that, she renewed her quest to maintain a healthy lifestyle, which eventually led her back to bodybuilding. She began training at Total Fitness of Columbus, working with owner and bodybuilder Mark Perry. Jeffries trains at Total Fitness of Columbus. P a g e 34
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SHE m a g a z i n e • j u n e 2 0 1 0
“I think the best
part is feeling every day like I’m
— Michell Jeffries
With the support of her husband, Jamie, and daughters, Jerrica and Jaelan, she competed for the first time professionally last year, with friend and fellow bodybuilder Christal Downing. “She wanted to do it, and at first I wasn’t real sure,” Jeffries said. “I lost 40 pounds to do the show, and once I took my mind off the scale and on the contest, I totally transformed my body.” She said the competition, held in Indianapolis, was surreal; however she wasn’t nervous as she thought she’d be. “There’s nothing like it,” she said. “You’re surrounded by athletes who have worked so hard to get there.” Jeffries wasn’t new to the bodybuilding competition scene. After all, she’d traveled to competitions as a child, with White. “I love the atmosphere. When we were backstage getting ready, I wasn’t nervous,” she said. “I felt like I was at home.” For this year’s competition, held June 12, Jeffries stepped up her training and nutrition regimen and felt even better about her chances in her heavyweight class. She began preparation in February. june 2010 • she magazine
Perry said Jeffries made tremendous improvements from last year. “She did really well and looked really good last year, but after the competition last year she asked me what she could do to get better,” he said. “This year she did a good job in the off-season of keeping herself in good shape.” Perry works with Jeffries weekly to establish and adjust her diet and cardio workouts. “She’s already a strong girl so she had a lot of muscle to work with. We just had her eating more protein and less carbohydrates,” he said. The weeks leading up to competition can be particularly difficult. “It takes a lot of discipline and control,” Jeffries said. “But I think the best part is feeling every day like I’m accomplishing something.” She said at first she struggled with her religious beliefs and the perception of vanity that comes with the sport of bodybuilding. “I really prayed about that,” she said. “Everything I do, I give glory to God. It’s not about me. God wouldn’t have given me this at age 10 if I wasn’t meant to go somewhere with it.” page 37
n her Own
army of one
during her husband’s
By Jennifer Willhite Photos by April Knox When Stephanie Darringer married her husband, Rob, 15 years ago, the possibility of being separated from him by thousands of miles was the furthest thing from her mind. Although he was a member of the National Guard, an overseas deployment had always seemed a remote possibility. He had been in the service for 17 years and had never been called up. The Darringers’ two boys, Spencer and Christian, now 13 and 11, were accustomed to their dad being home and spending time with them. The predictability of his National Guard obligations had fostered a sense of comfort in the family’s routine.
Their youngest child, a daughter, Shalee, 7, was not quite a month old when Rob was called to active duty in early 2003. Due to the activation, he was commuting daily from their home in Osgood to Camp Atterbury. It didn’t take long for the couple to realize the arrangement wasn’t working. That first year proved very difficult and almost cost the couple their marriage. “Sometimes he wouldn’t come home until midnight, and he would have to be back at six in the morning,” said Darringer. “So my kids wouldn’t even see him.” She and her children moved to Columbus. Then, in 2009, things changed again. He was being deployed overseas. “It was a whirlwind of emotion to say the least,” Darringer said. “You expect the one weekend a month, two weeks out of a
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summer. And then I went from that to being slammed into full-time mom on my own. It’s kind of the role of a single mom, except for the fact that you are worrying every day about your spouse, because they’re in harm’s way.” A new reality Since the deployment, they rely on
Web cam, texts, phone calls and e-mail to stay in touch. “Relying on life through Web cam sucks,” Darringer said. “In the beginning it was the best thing ever, because at least you are getting to hear their voice and see them.” They are able to talk on a regular ba-
Stephanie Darringer with husband, Rob, top, and children, Spencer, Christian and Shalee, bottom. Page 40
sis with the aid of Skype, a program that allows users to see and hear each other via the Internet. However, they’ve found that connections are easily interrupted and calls may be dropped without warning. Due to a significant time difference, the children usually rely on texting to communicate with their dad. Getting to speak with him on a regular basis is “hit or miss,” according to Darringer. “He’ll try to call,” she said. “Sometimes he will stay up really late if they had a ball game that day or something.” Darringer says her husband’s absence has been an adjustment, especially for her sons. Her daughter has never known anything else. “We waited forever to get a girl,” Darringer said. “And we finally get a girl, and he shipped out. I had her in December 2002, and he was called up in January 2003.” Maintaining a packed schedule, including extracurricular activities and everyday obligations, all while adjusting to her husband’s deployment, has not been easy. In the beginning, while still working outside the home, she and the children were gone every night of the week. “I was staying up until three in the morning just to get laundry done,” she said. After catching a nap, she would get up for work and start all over. When her children began to have behavioral difficulties in school and at home, Darringer decided it was time to resign her position at Clifty Creek Elementary School and devote more time to her family. “A part of me has felt guilty because my husband is gone,” Darringer said. “So I’ve let them get away with more than I normally would.” During the holidays and special occasions, such as Christmas and birthdays, they rely on Skype to connect them so they can see one another and have some semblance of normalcy. Fabulous friends In the wake of the deployment, Darringer has found much needed support with a group self-dubbed the Fab Seven. Before her husband deployed, a formal was held during the departure ceremony. Darringer met the wives of the SHE m a g a z i n e • j u n e 2 0 1 0
other soldiers who were leaving with her husband, and the women immediately clicked. She said they have helped one another stay sane and grounded during a difficult time. Whether it is a weekend retreat to the city or a shopping trip for a day that concludes with a gathering at one of their homes, the women find comfort and support in one another’s company. They meet on Facebook, send texts and instant messages, and routinely call to chat. It’s nothing for one to travel several hours to spend the day with another, just because. “They have been truly what has gotten me through this,” Darringer said. Amy Tracy is the only other member of the Fab Seven to live in Columbus. The rest are scattered over northern Indiana. Tracy initially resisted her husband’s suggestion of getting to know the other wives but soon gave in and found their camaraderie invaluable. “It just kind of happened,” Tracy said. “It’s like God said, ‘OK, you need somebody, and they need you,’ so he just kind
Some of the members of the Fab Seven are, from left, Stephanie Bishop, Amy Tracy, Devon Moore, Darringer and Lynn Garbison
of put us together to get us through it.” The friendship the women have forged affords them an opportunity to feel normal when everything around them seems to be anything but ordinary. They have an inherent understanding where no explanation is necessary for bad days, crying spells or venting sessions. And there are no apologies.
Darringer jokes that upon her husband’s return she would like to pay tribute to their time apart. “I always tell my husband, ‘You may be in charge over there, but I outrank you here,” she said. “I told him, ‘I’m going to get a tattoo. And I am gonna have your rank and I’m gonna have a tiara over it, because that’s my rank and it outranks yours.’”
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New Patients Welcome june 2010 • she magazine
Chicken wrap makes perfect picnic meal By Jim Romanoff Associated Press
SHE m a g a z i n e â€˘ j u n e 2 0 1 0
THAI-STYLE CHICKEN WRAPS WITH MANGO SALSA Summer meals are best when they are simple. But that doesn’t mean you have to give up sophisticated flavors. Thai-style chicken wraps are an exotic all-in-one, a handheld meal that contains protein, salad and starch rolled up into a neat package that’s perfect for outdoor dining. All you’ll need are some plates, napkins and a few forks for the sweet and tangy mango salsa that accompanies the wraps. If you’re planning a picnic, you can refrigerate the wraps and serve them cold. Skip the salsa to make for easy packing. Or if you like, serve it in disposable cups with plastic forks.
Start to finish: 30 minutes Servings: 4 For the salsa: 1 small mango, peeled and diced 2 tablespoons coarsely chopped fresh cilantro 1 tablespoon lime juice For the wraps: 1½ tablespoons toasted sesame oil 3 cups shredded Napa cabbage 1 cup shredded carrots 3/4 cup sliced scallions 3/4 cup lightly salted peanuts, coarsely chopped 2 tablespoons lime juice 1 tablespoon soy sauce ¼ teaspoon ground black pepper
To make the salsa, in a small bowl, stir together the mango, cilantro and lime juice. Cover and refrigerate until ready to serve. To make the wraps, in a large skillet over mediumhigh, heat the sesame oil. Add cabbage and carrots and saute until the vegetables begin to soften, about 2 minutes. Stir in the scallions and peanuts. Add the lime juice, soy sauce and black pepper, then saute until the mixture is heated through, about 2 minutes longer. Remove the pan from the heat and stir in the chicken and mint. Spread the center of each tortilla with about 1 tablespoon of peanut sauce. Top with a quarter of the chicken filling. Fold in 2 ends of the tortilla, then roll up. Place the wraps on a microwave safe plate, seamside down. Heat the wraps in the microwave on high until heated through, about 1½ minutes, or in a 350-degree oven for about 5 minutes. Serve with the mango salsa. Nutrition information per serving (values are rounded to the nearest whole number): 407 calories; 121 calories from fat; 14 g fat (3 g saturated; 0 g trans fats); 66 mg cholesterol; 39 g carbohydrate; 33 g protein;4 g fiber; 1030 mg sodium.
2 cups shredded cooked chicken ½ cup coarsely chopped fresh mint 4 burrito-size (large) flour tortillas ¼ cup purchased peanut sauce
june 2010 • she magazine
p a g e 43
All movement is good, and it all counts By Shayla Holtkamp
P a g e 44
SHE m a g a z i n e • j u n e 2 0 1 0
The No. 1 reason people give as to why they don’t exercise is that they don’t have time.
My response is always, “You don’t have time NOT to.” It is an undisputed fact that physical activity reduces the risk of acquiring a lifestyle disease. A lifestyle disease is a condition that can be attributed to our lifestyle choices. Things we do to ourselves or things we don’t do for ourselves. It doesn’t take a lot of physical activity to reduce the risk of a lifestyle disease. The U.S. surgeon general says that all we have to do to reduce the risk is to perform moderate activity over most days of the week for 30 minutes a day. He doesn’t say we have to do it all at one time. Ten-minute segments three times a day work. The majority of people, when beginning an exercise program, are enthusiastic and set goals that may not be attainable. Life gets in the way of goals, and when we can’t achieve them, many people give up altogether. Exercise for health benefits is not an all-or-none scenario. Benefits can be received with any kind of movement above and beyond being a couch potato. If you find it will be too difficult to keep your exercise schedule, don’t give up. It’s important to allow for setbacks and come up with a backup plan. Example: You have a busy week coming up. School is ending, tennis lessons begin, baseball practice is in the evening and you have to juggle all of this while working an 8-to-5 job. Without a doubt your evening exercise class is not going to fit into this schedule. Find those hidden little movement opportunities. Do you have 15 minutes to walk a couple of laps around the baseball field? How about 10 minutes in the evening after dinner to take a walk with the family or walk the dog? Can you get up 15 minutes earlier and take a walk in the cooler parts of the day? These movement opportunities matter in the larger scope of reducing your risk for the all-threatening lifestyle diseases that take a majority of American lives prematurely. Exercise should be sustainable over a lifetime in order to live a quality-filled, disease-free life. On the exercise continuum, one end being no exercise and the other end being intense physical activity that athletes perform in order to be good at their sport, there is a lot of room to move. It’s all good!
Now, some tips to help you out. Check your busy schedule on Sunday night. Find those times that you might be able to fit in a 15-minute walk here and there and write it on your calendar. Be prepared for those unexpected opportunities by having a pair of walking shoes already in your car ready to go. Find moms who will walk with you at baseball practice. At work, of course, do the always suggested “take the steps instead of the elevator,” but in addition, walk to see co-workers instead of calling or sending e-mail. Do seated chair exercises, wall sits and any other exercises you can come up with that you can do at work. The Internet is full of them. Spend time with your family on the weekend by hiking, swimming and playing some of those old-fashioned games like tag and red rover. And most important: Don’t get down on yourself if you miss a day. Begin again tomorrow. All movement counts! Shayla Holtkamp is a Columbus resident and personal trainer for the Wellness Program.
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p a g e 45
A bond forged by
loss By Tim Coriden
Let me start off by stating that my father-inlaw, Larry, and I have a good relationship. We don’t pal around together, but we enjoy each other’s company during our visits. I have been fortunate in that regard, because we have vastly different backgrounds. Larry was one of three boys, raised in a Jewish household on the east side of Cleveland. He has a master’s degree in Asian studies and was at one time, proficient in speaking Mandarin. He is the father to two and the grandfather to three. Larry and my mother-in-law have dedicated more than 30 years of their lives to being professional woodcarvers and artists. Their woodcarvings have been placed on the White House Christmas tree, used in movies and collected by avid followers across the nation. Larry is a hawkish fiscal conservative, in that he buys everything in cash, frowns on using credit and has no use for frills. On the flip side, he is fairly left-winged socially and outspoken about his beliefs. In fact, “outspoken” is likely the adjective most of his acquaintances would use to describe him. Truthfully, Larry is eerily similar to Larry David’s portrayal of himself in the HBO comedy, “Curb Your Enthusiasm.” Many times, I have quipped to my wife that Larry and I share almost nothing in common. But I know that to be untrue. Besides being married to his daughter, and our sons being his first two grandchildren, we share a painful affinity for small-market sports franchises.
P a g e 46
Larry’s teams being the three Cleveland professional sports franchises: Browns, Indians and Cavaliers. Where I, on the other hand, cheer for the two Indianapolis professional sports franchises, Pacers and Colts, as well as the Cincinnati Reds. SHE m a g a z i n e • j u n e 2 0 1 0
Being a fan of these teams, or other small-market teams, is not for the faint of heart. Cleveland fans, in particular, have suffered during the years, having not won a professional championship since 1964. Their teams have been to multiple conference championships, only to come up short. In 1997, the Indians lost the seventh game of the World Series in the 11th inning; in 1987, the Browns surrendered a 98-yard touchdown drive to John Elway’s Broncos in the final minutes and lost in overtime in the AFC Championship. In 2007, the Cavaliers were swept by the San Antonio Spurs in the NBA Finals. Worse than losing, however, Larry and other Cleveland fans have had to watch as their favorite team moved to a different city (Browns move to Baltimore, circa 1996). Today and for the next several months, he will be left to fret, as Ohio’s native son and reigning NBA MVP, LeBron James, contemplates leaving the Cavaliers for a larger market team (aka — “greener” pastures). My teams have fared a bit better, but
not by much during most of my lifetime. The Reds gave us a World Series in 1990. Of course, there was also the Big Red Machine of the 1970s, but I was not old enough to appreciate those teams, so I can’t revel in their victories. The Colts provided Indianapolis fans with a Super Bowl victory in 2006, and yet the Colts have had their share of numerous heartbreaking moments (for example, the 2010 Super Bowl). The Pacers, led by favorite Reggie Miller, made the NBA Finals in 2000, losing to the Lakers in six games. Similar to Larry’s experience of losing the Browns to another city, Pacers fans watched in horror as the players themselves temporarily destroyed a franchise and a chance for a championship by brawling with Detroit fans in 2004. Despite the endless frustrations, each year during pre-seasons and spring training Larry and I earnestly discuss our teams’ chances of winning a championship. However, by mid-season, we usually shift our focus to the following season and the steps that need to be taken in the meantime to build a con-
tender. By the end of the season, we are usually left cheering for any small- to mid-market team that might be contending for the championship. Ours is a bond shared between fans of small-market sports franchises: that of cheering for Good against Evil; the eternal hope that your underdog team can catch lightning in a bottle and win the championship. Despite our philosophical, theological and cultural differences, this bond allows people like us to empathize and commiserate with one another as our teams sometimes succeed and more often than not, flounder. Of course, outsiders, like my wife and mother-in-law, think we’re just a couple of hopeless nuts. Tim Coriden is the city attorney. He lives in Columbus with his wife and two boys.
Mann’s Harley- Davidson | 3250 W Market Place Dr Edinburgh 812 - 526 -3485 june 2010 • she magazine
Minute © Thinkstock
Out and about Looking for a great way to enjoy the summer weather and some time with the girls? Ride in this weekend’s Girlfriend Ride, a three-tier bicycle ride that starts at Central
Middle School and raises money for Turning Point Domestic Violence Services. Registration runs from 8 to 10 a.m. Saturday and is $25 per rider.
Recommended reading “Women, Food and God: An Unexpected Guide to Almost Everything,” by Geneen Roth. 211 pages. $24 No matter how sophisticated or wealthy or broke or enlightened you are, how you eat tells all. The way you eat is inseparable from your core beliefs about being alive. Your relationship with food is an exact mirror of your feelings about love, fear, anger, meaning, transformation and, yes, even God. But it doesn’t stop there. Geneen Roth shows how going beyond both the food and feelings takes you deeper into realms of spirit and soul to the bright center of your own life.
If you suffer about your relationship with food, you can be free. Just look down at your plate. The answers are there. Don’t run. Look. Because when we welcome what we most want to avoid, we contact the part of ourselves that is fresh and alive. We touch the life we truly want and evoke divinity itself. On every page, this book is a knock-yoursocks-off ride to a deeply fulfilling relationship with food and your body. “Women, Food and God” is, quite simply, a guide for life. —Viewpoint Books
P a g e 48
Grubs are quite often publicized as a threat to the home lawn. I encourage you to do some investigation before blindly applying grub control products. For example, when you did have dead areas of the lawn, did you see evidence of them and their damage? Grub-damaged lawns can easily be pulled up like carpet, and you can see the C-shaped grubs near the surface.
If you do treat with an insecticide, now is the time to apply the products. The current products have a longer window of activity to allow for better timing of controlling the grubs before damage occurs. Biological products such as milky spore and nematodes have been shown to be effective for those wanting to use alternative products. — Extension educator Mike Ferree
SHE m a g a z i n e • j u n e 2 0 1 0
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