CONTENTS Chas-docker at Bond 04 2 Shuba Krishnan WELCOME to the new look Scope… Its time to change things up… Scope is Bond University’s student publication, it’s a medium for students to have their work published, a portal for student’s to express their opinions, a way in which BUSA can communicate, inform and channel their developments, and a canvas for the artists, poets and photographers to inspire us all. In this edition of Scope we say… .‘Happy (Belated) Diwali’ – Diwali is the Hindu festival of lights - and to help celebrate and keep the cultural festivities alive and kicking we explore India and the gastronomic delights of this beautiful countries food. Also in this edition, our sub-editor Ben, explores a controversial topic on censorship, we see what the heavyweights of the business world had to offer, the Byron Bay BYROCEAN write-up and the always-popular Palaver photos.
15 Reasons 05 Bondies for Boobies 06 Sports Awards 08 Pictures 10 HSA, LSA 12 The Scope Review 14 Movember 16 Away, Propaganda 17 Features 18
Your magazine, your Scope has evolved with the help of the new editorial team - these are the creative minds that will put together the publication each week for the next twelve months. Each person on the team adds their own flavour to the magazine and I look forward to working and learning with them and seeing where this exciting journey takes us. Enjoy our first issue and please remember that this is YOUR student magazine, thus it should express your voice, and this can only be done by your contribution. You can contribute by sending your work to studentpublications@bond. edu.au
SEND IN YOUR LETTERS! Do you want to contribute? Have something to say? Any comments? Have something you want published? Don’t be shy! Just write in to: firstname.lastname@example.org
Q&A with BUSA treasurer, Rupert Pedler
incur the majority of the costs so we are looking into alternate revenue schemes. In terms of that answer I’d say, at the moment there’s no actual review process. There’s $5000 allocated as clubs expenditure. And that’s $5000 extra which can be allocated over the course of the semester.
If a club member was to walk up to you and tell you they didn’t have enough money for an event what would be your answer to them? Firstly, BUSA has two sources of revenue. We’ve got our own funds where we make revenue from things like the Don’s on a Thursday, which collects revenue at the door as well as from the events that we run. We try and make it as cheap as possible for the students and sometimes there is a profit made. The other source of revenue is from SAM, from this year’s funding allocations we have about $60,000 allocated to BUSA this semester. What I’d like to see is that allocation start to come down and the amount we have to allocate to clubs, increase. But in order to do so we need to replace that revenue for BUSA with something else because we do run the majority of events on campus and we
This year’s funding allocation shows the AFL Club requested funding to buy a certain amount of shirts. That request was for $400 and BUSA responded with $200. How do you decide whether it be $200 or $400? Do you go out and do the research and find out the real prices on the shirts? No it’s not that scientific. At the moment it’s very much discretionary, and that’s something when we’re doing our funding allocation review we want to start giving reasons for these things. The reason for the uniforms – BUSA and SAM is not going to pay for these because by the most part they’re personal items. If the AFL Club goes out and buys a shirt, it’s probably going to stay with the person they give it to. So there’s no point us paying $20 or $40 for a t-shirt that’s just going to go to one person and stay with them.
“What they’re trying to do is save up their own money themselves and get more money from BUSA. They should be contributing to their activities as well.” What about clubs that make their own money? Some of the organisations and
What they’re trying to do is save up their own money themselves and get more money from BUSA. They should be contributing to their activities as well. But BUSA will try and make up the difference because we don’t want clubs or individuals to be out-of-pocket for running an event. Where does the funding fit in with the argument in the President’s Debate from the Pure Bond and Catalyst teams which was to fund a diverse range of events instead of the alcohol-related events? The reason the alcohol-related groups get so much is because they have a really wide base of students who are interested in doing those sorts of things. If they have twice as many students, then they get twice as much money. But we definitely try to encourage the smaller clubs to start up and that’s why we do give them funding and we will sit down with them and help them with their plans that they hope to reach by the end of the semester. If they have really detailed plans that we can see fitting in really well in the social calendar we will definitely help with that. If they don’t have a plan in place and they don’t know what their expenditure will be then we will be a lot more hesitant to provide them with
Rupert, when you walk through Bond what questions do people ask you?
When they can sell an idea to me and can show me they’re spending the Student Activities Membership (SAM) money wisely I’m able to allocate out of the $5000 of extra funding money we have each semester.
They’ll (clubs) have an event and they’ll have an expected revenue and then the expected expenses and the difference between that they ask BUSA to fund. Any surplus that a club gets is kept with the club and so hopefully that will fund future endeavours that they may have. That’s why we would like to see, in the future, more bank statements – we want to know how much money clubs and organisations are actually dealing with. If you take a look at some of the student faculty associations, who have serious amounts of cash behind them, they put in requests of between $10,000 - $15,000 every semester and that’s not even half of what they actually have in their own pockets themselves.
It’s the time of year where another group of strong-minded individuals take the reign of the all-mighty Bond University Student Association (BUSA) and once again banter and gossip over funding allocations fill Bond’s corridors of power. Scope sub-editor Benjamin Strick questions the suit-clad calculator Rupert Pedler, BUSA’s new treasurer, on the ins and outs of club funding.
I get asked quite a few times things like: “can I have some more money?” But all I can really tell them is that we will have to see how they go.
clubs in this year’s allocation have less money allocated to them than what they actually made.
To boldly go where no man has gone before – that’s the Chaser motto. They’re the guys who push the boundaries between laughter, satire and just plain political incorrectness.
I can’t even talk about my own contracts with people. I can’t even face a bill. I don’t even open the letter. What’s your favorite curse word? Um, I’m not sure you’d call it… do we count sexual acts as curse words? My favorite dubious concept or curse word would be ah….ahhh, space-docking. Are you aware of space-docking? Space docking is when…ah, when someone… this will be very educational. Can I just go on the record and say I never spacedocked or nor wish to space-dock at any point in time in the future. It’s when you take shall we say…when you shit. And then you put it in the freezer and then you use it as a dildo….on either a man or a woman. Don’t try it at home. There you go…I don’t know if that’s a curse word. It’s a curse concept.
Chas Licciardello is one of the hosts from the ABC’s Chaser’s War on Everything. He is a self’ professed ‘blog-reading nerd’, and has dabbled in everything from the absurd (injecting half his face with botox) to the downright perilous (the infamous Bin Laden APEC stunt) all in the name of comedy Broke, plain-clothed and making scandals off his own back, Chas took a quick flight from Sydney for a Cerum theatre Q&A session at Bond University. Student Dani Smyth spoke to Chas afterwards about spacedocking and Chaser’isms. So, for people who have never seen the show, how would you describe it and what is the goal of the show? I would describe the show as a cross between Jackass, Candid Camera and The Daily Show. Except without the guts of Jackass, without the humor of Candid Camera and without the intelligence of The Daily Show [Laughs]. And the goal of our show is to remain on air.
So you don’t have any qualms with that? Nah, no qualms. People can download me all they like. What sound do you hate? Ah yeah…yeah, the sound I hate is the sound of the church bell when church is about to start. I’ve been dragged to church most of my life. Not that I have
Chas-docker at Bond
Speaking of American shows, have you seen the show Inside the Actors Studio? Yes. There are these 10 questions the host asks all his guests. Mind if I ask you? Yeah, go for it.
Okay cool. What’s your favorite word? Hmm. Squelch. It’s onomatopoeic and I just like the concept of squelching. It’s the action or sound when you squeeze water under your foot. Ah and similarly, what sound do you love? The sound I like the most is the “oh-oh” sound that my bit-torrent program makes when a new movie has finished downloading. What it signifies is wonderful...the sound of a free movie.
a problem with religion, you can be as religious as you like I just don’t wanna be part of it. Can’t think of anything more boring than mass though, the sound of the church bell for me is a signal to start counting down from 3,600. What profession would you like to attempt if you couldn’t do your own? Without any doubt at all if I could I do anything I’d be an Aussie Rules Footballer... I love Aussie Rules more than I love anything else. If there was ever any question of me having either the skill or the physical capacity to play AFL, I definitely would have. What profession would you never want to do? Nothing financial. I fall asleep whenever people start talking money.
This doesn’t necessarily need to be sexual but uh… what turns you on, spiritually or creatively? Well, I love learning. I’m a real geek and I just can’t get enough of learning things so what turns me on is when I discover on the internet a really, really, really cool fact. Yah there was one that I really liked which was that America, apparently at the moment is spending three times the GDP of Afghanistan, in Afghanistan, on the war. They could buy the country three times over every single year rather than have that war. Crazy.
Squelch. It’s onomatopoeic and I just like the concept of squelching. It’s the action or sound when you squeeze water under your foot. What turns you off? I would say what really turns me off is when people are confronted with a rational argument and they don’t care. I really hate that. I don’t mind if people disagree with me. That’s fine. But I hate when people deny the truth. There isn’t always a truth. I’m not saying everything’s black and white. Every now and then there is a truth, but people deny facts and pretend they don’t care, that really turns me off. If heaven does exist and you were at the pearly gates, what would you want to hear God say? I would want to hear God say “woof” … cause I really like dogs.
Reasons Why society has gone to the dogs. VINNIE RUGARI
Dane Cook. This guy’s supposed to be a comedian, but stolen jokes, silly sounding words like ‘skiddly-do’ and anecdotes with no punchline is not comedy. Dane Cook is one of a series of entertainers whose material is designed to keep the population ignorant and shallow.
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Fox News. Any news outlet that promotes the agendas of people like Bill O’Reilly and Glenn Beck is automatically doing a disservice. But even worse…
Woolworths Limited. By buying almost every local pub in Australia, eating it, and regurgitating it as a soulless faux-cocktail bar for yuppies,Woolworths is culturally raping Australian pub culture in every orifice available.
Bono hate. What kind of topsy-turvy world do we live in when we actively despise a man for promoting the change that we are not human enough to recognise needs to happen?
Toilets in the batlabs. No matter how technologically advanced we may be, some of us are still cavemen.
Fox News’ audience. The reason why Fox News exists - nay, thrives – is even more depressing than the vitriol they ejaculate. It’s because 80% of people are retards who need their information processed before it reaches their delicate minds.
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Old people talking about Twitter. Just stop.
Nickelback. Sonic sludge.
Wolfmother. You know it’s time to give up your dreams of rock stardom when you need to hire advertising boards at the NRL Grand Final. The AFL. I’m sure Germany was a nice place in the 1930s, but it had a mad man in charge. Well, Australian rules is a great sport, but because of the AFL’s reckless dismantling of every rule that makes the game unique, and their insane push into a Western Sydney region that doesn’t even know how to spell AFL, you wouldn’t know it.
Rescue: Special Ops. Really? This is it? Australia, how did we get here?
MTV. It used to stand for Music Television. Now it stands for mindless, morally loose Paris Hiltonclones. And on the rare occasion they do play music, it’s just noise.
Yindies (yuppie indies). Get normal.
Articles like this. The fact that a 19 year old nobody can wax lyrical about why society isn’t to his particular liking, and publish it to an entire university, is proof that we are at rock bottom.
Reality television. It was bad enough before, but only now can we see how desperate some people are to be a part of it. The ‘balloon boy’ saga, as it turns out, was a hoax planned by the family “to better market themselves for a reality show at some point in the future”. These people should be marketing themselves as moving targets for shooting galleries.
BONDIES FOR BOOBIES
Third year medical student
Saturday October 17 was a big day for 48 girls from the Health Sciences and Medicine Faculty and wider university who banded together to form the Bond Believe Team. Together we took on the Gold Coast leg of the national all-girls Triathlon Pink Circuit. This triathlon, with the emphasis on challenge, participation and fun, aims to raise much needed funds and awareness for the National Breast Cancer Foundation. Decked out in team shirts, a tutu, bright pink sunnies and many huge smiles the girls swam, peddled and ran their way through Runaway Bay doing themselves and the cause proud. Some were certainly faster than others, Charlotte King, Kirsty Manyweathers and Lana Gibson from Marketing, blitzed the field to take out second in the relay team category. While second-year medicine students, Stephanie Tan and Anh Vu also did a fantastic job finishing second and third respectively in the 16 to 19-year-old category. Others were just relieved to cross the finish line all body parts intact. The entire team can hold their heads high as they showed what it means to be active, fit and healthy while contributing to finding a cure for breast cancer.
One in eight Australian women will be diagnosed with breast cancer in their lifetime. Finding breast cancer early provides the best chance of surviving the disease. You don’t have to use a special technique or be an expert. Take the time to get to know the normal look and feel of your breasts as part of your daily routine – while dressing, showering or looking in the mirror. Knowing what is normal for you will help you detect any new breast chances. Nine out of 10 breast changes are not due to cancer – but see your doctor to be sure. Let’s make Pink just a colour again.
One in eight Australian women will be diagnosed with breast cancer in their lifetime. Make sure you keep your eyes and ears out for our call-to-arms come October next year. Each year we hope to have a bigger, better and brighter team ready to show Breast Cancer and the world what the girls of Bond are really made of. It’s never too early to start training, actions speak louder than words. Watch out 2010, we’ll be back.
How sport ca 8
Bond is infamous for many things: our unique tri-semestral calendar, our small class sizes, our active student life, James Graham’s notorious haircuts and of course our controversial founder whose name our university now bears. Bond has built a reputation for itself over the past 20 years as a university that is academically sound and rich in co-curricular life. Yet our sporting programmes are never mentioned in any of our key attributes, the Marketing Department never prints, let alone publishes, glossy brochures with big blue sky backgrounds called ‘Sport @ Bond’. In fact if you visit marketing’s ‘piece de resistance’ at www.bond.edu.au the only sad reference to sport on the entire site is a greyed-out list of clubs for which there is no further information available. This is quite surprising when you consider the success that many of our fellow Bond students have had in their respective sporting fields. In fact, at the Beijing Olympics, Bond students took home a range of medals including Gold in both the Olympic and Paralympic competitions. Furthermore, this year Bond won the population cup at the 2009 Australian University Games and has had a huge amount of success in our club and external competitions.
Sports award winners, Sam Hourigan, James Roberts, Gene Kubala
Last Friday night, the Student Association hosted the 2009 Sports Dinner where the university’s most accomplished athletes, teams and clubs were recognised. Gene Kubala was awarded the ‘Sports Star of the Year’ for his outstanding achievements in swimming including his selection in the U/20 Australian team, representation at the World University Games, three gold medals at Australian University Games and his membership of the Australian Telstra Dolphins team. Will Cundy was recognised with the Sporting Silk for his work in the water polo and cycling clubs whilst Annabelle Williams, Gene Kubla and James Roberts were awarded University Blues for their high levels of sporting excellence throughout the year.
an play its part at Bond ALEX SMITH
Fittingly, the Rugby Union Club received the award for the best sporting club of the year. Like many of the other recipients, Tim and the achievements of the Rugby Club provide examples of how important student leadership in sports is at this university. The development of the Bond University Rugby Club is an outstanding example of the difference one student can make in their contribution to campus life and the importance of coaching and sporting infrastructure. Besides, anyone who doesn’t enjoy rugby union is not a real person or probably comes from Melbourne (which is pretty much the same thing anyway).
commitment. In conjunction with last year’s Student Association, Tim has worked hard to build the infrastructure at Bond which will enable the university to foster and compliment the overall academic and intellectual growth of Bond students and provide experiences that will enable them to interact in a sporting environment with other students, test their own personal limits, and gain from the demands and realities of athletic competition and the success and adversity that go with it. Bond University already has an active sporting population and as the University continues to grow, Bond will thrive in having the ability to not only market itself on the University’s ability to offer students exceptional academic programmes, but also on its ability to offer students a well rounded and balanced university experience.
But perhaps the most notable recipient on the evening was the winner of this year’s Outstanding Service Award. The recipient, Tim Lee, has been behind the sporting scenes for the past three years at Bond. Tim Lee came to Bond in 2007 and despite the fact that he is neither built like Jonah Lomu nor has the athletic flair of Sterling Mortlock, he has certainly displayed a passion for sport at Bond with a particular emphasis on Rugby Union.
In fact if you visit marketing’s ‘piece de resistance’ at www.bond. edu.au the only sad reference to sport on the entire site is a greyedout list of clubs for which there is no further information available. Although they will not be enlisting for the Wallabies any time soon, the commitment and dedication of the rugby club is an exceptional example to other clubs and will leave a legacy that will hopefully outlast even the greatest of our sporting club presidents. Students have a role in fostering a strong commitment to sport and the role that it plays in a balanced educational environment. Supporting strong competition and successful student athletes is a major part of that
Sport Award winner, Tim Lee
Bond University Lawn Bowls 10
HSA Service to Students Award Winner DANIELLE LEONIE
The HSA would like to congratulate Tristan Blom, the winner of this semester’s HSA Service to Students Award.
Announced at the recent Humanities and Social Sciences Faculty Dean’s Awards night, the Service to Students Award recognises a student who has made outstanding contributions to the Humanities faculty. The Humanities Students’ Association introduced this award in 2008 to acknowledge students who are actively involved in the faculty. Throughout his degree Tristan was heavily involved in Bond life and especially involved in Humanities related extra-curriculars, serving as academic director on the Humanities Students’ Association. Tristan has recently completed his combined Bachelor of International Relations and Bachelor of Laws degree and is currently working at the Career Development Centre. Congratulations to Tristan and all the Dean’s Awards winners! Humanities and Social Sciences Graduate Panel The Faculty of Humanities and Social Sciences, in conjunction with the Humanities Students’ Association is excited to invite you to our upcoming Graduate Panel, titled ‘The Insight Series – the experience beyond Bond’. The event functions as an interactive question-and-answer style discussion between students and our panel of six industry members. The panel is comprised of industry professionals with a range of backgrounds including psychology, journalism, advertising, and international relations.
Panellists include: • Mr Craig Wilson, Executive Director of The Foundation for Development Cooperation • Dr Eda Beck, President of the Gold Coast Branch of the Australian Psychological Society • Ms Liz Scott, counsellor and Bond alumnus • Ms Anna Lise Rosendahl, journalist and Bond alumnus Students not only have the opportunity to ask experts about their industry and particular career path, but will be able to meet and greet at the networking event following the discussion. The graduate panel discussion runs 4:30pm to 6:30pm Friday 6 November at the University Club Restaurant, followed by a cocktail networking event at the University Club Lounge from 6:30pm to 7:30pm. To RSVP and guarantee your seat, email Anoushcka Bridgman at email@example.com by October 30. Book Sale Reminder Don’t forget to collect your unsold books and money by 2pm Thursday this week, otherwise they will become the property of the HSA. This is your absolute last chance to pick up your books and money – after this week nothing can be returned to you. Check online at www.bondhsa.com to see if your books have sold. The office is open 10am – 2pm Monday to Thursday.
Graduate Panel Insight Series - The Experience Beyond Bond
The Faculty of Humanities and Social Sciences (HSS), in conjunction with the Humanities Students’ Association (HSA), present the Graduate Panel Forum titled ‘Insight Series - The Experience Beyond Bond’ The Series provides HSS students the opportunity to meet, listen to and question industr y professionals and Bond alumni about caree r development and their potential career experience beyond Bond . Concluding the forum discussions, a cocktail reception will be hosted for students to network with the industr y and alumni guests . Date: Friday 6th November 2009 Time and Venue: Graduate Panel Forum: 4.30pm-6.30pm, University Club Restaurant Networking Cocktail Reception: 6.30pm-7.30pm, University Club Lounge Cost: Free RSVP: Anouschka Bridgman (firstname.lastname@example.org) by the 30th October 2009
Dean Raoul Mortley, award winner Tristan Blom, and HSA Representative Natasha Veljkovic
Clayton Utz representative Robinder Sihota, Dean of Law, Professor Geraldine Mackenzie, negotiation champions Brad Ramsden and Adam Goldner, LSA president Tessa Dignam
Clayton Utz Negotiations Competition MADISON BONE
150 competitors, 16 faculty and student judges, 11 LSA members, 6 skills room, 47 coffees, 2 epic days, the Clayton Utz Negotiation Competition 2009. The 093 competition saw the biggest participation of a negotiation competition to date. With three times the sign up of last year’s competition our competitions director, Rowan Kendall, had his work cut out for him. The final product often involved five skills rooms full of students negotiating their way through the problem of Dignam Wineries or the troublesome theatre hire that was Benny Bone and Nathan Norris, starting at 9am and concluding at 3pm. Preparing for an event such as this isn’t so much just organising how the competition will run on the day but also creating an action system for the inevitable occurrence of on-the-spot problems. Teams who didn’t show up, didn’t have partners, got the wrong time, or got lost on the way (the legal skills building can be confusing) – all this and much, much more. Hiccups aside, everyone who participated must be congratulated for their contribution to the smooth running of the two days of competition.
study room. Robinder then told plenty of stories about his time here and relived some of the more lively memories of his Bond days. Both the LSA and Clayton Utz (vicariously, through Robinder) were ecstatic with the functioning of the competition and send their congratulations to the runners-up, Jimmy HvD and Anna Eraclides, and the senior champions who will be representing us at QLSA and ALSA, Adam Goldner and Brad Ramsden.
While we are still trialing a public final, the display the four finalists gave on Friday afternoon was of a spectacular standard. With our three guest judges, Sarah Cunynghame (last year’s champion), Professor John Lessing (Deputy Dean of the Law Faculty) and Robinder Sihota (Clayton Utz lawyer and, more importantly, ex-Bondie), the final was a learning experience for the 60 audience members who managed to squeeze into the case
This competition has been a great way to end the academic competition calendar for this year and the LSA couldn’t be happier with how law students have embraced these opportunities to hone their practical skills.
For the new branch, the ALS students’ competition, the feedback from numerous faculty members will be highly useful in their upcoming assessment, however, there is also strong competition for the two finalist teams. The final will occur on Friday afternoon with the winners announced after this. It was supremely encouraging to see over 60 competitors sign-up in their very first semester.
Pro Bono Opportunities The Law Students Association is in the process of setting up a Pro Bono Students Australia (PBSA) program at
Bond. This is a great opportunity to gain valuable work experience whilst giving back to the community. The LSA is looking for interested Law Students to match with public interest law firms and community organisations in need of legal services. Some of the great opportunities you can expect include: • Networking and working side by side with professionals • Developing transferable skills •Gaining exposure to the labour market • Deepening your legal knowledge and experience • Having an opportunity to engage in valuable community service • Involving yourself in a unique experience to talk about in job interviews Please contact Katherine Mansted, the LSA’s external affairs director, to register your interest at katherine.mansted@ student.bond.edu.au Stay tuned for the ‘Pro Bono Listening Tour’ that will be conducted over the coming weeks. We are working towards creating a Pro Bono subcommittee and want to hear everyone’s thoughts about how the LSA can best serve the students through Pro Bono.
Faculty Student Associations
The xx: xx The xx are one of a series of overhyped, young British indie bands, but with a difference – they actually deserve all the praise. A four-piece from south London, they’ve just released their first album, xx, one of the most self-assured debuts in recent memory. Even more astounding is the fact that they don’t sound like anything else. Their inspirations are many in number, but obscure in nature, and their few contemporaries have been left in the dust. They have no hit single, no identifiable song like those before them, which gives more weight to that fact xx is actually an album in its purest form – cohesive and nuanced, not a mere collection of songs.
REVIEW Mumford & Sons have a banjo and double bass. They’re from London, playing modern folk music. Their name sounds like a general store from the 1900s. In other words, there is no way Mumford & Sons could be any cooler in 2009.
Even more astounding is the fact that they don’t sound like anything else. xx is about understatement; intentional sparseness. It’s clear The xx subscribe to the notion that musical notes are ‘expensive’, and that atmosphere can be created with less, not more. Singer/ guitarist Romy Madley Croft’s voice is only just more than a sensual whisper, and her minimalist guitar follows suit. She emotionally duels her counterpart, bassist Oliver Sim, whose thin, vulnerable mumblings are the perfect response to Croft’s seduction. The two trade verse-for-verse like a couple trying to work things out on tracks like ‘Shelter’ and ‘Basic Space’, where the silence and emptiness is just as important as the sound. Croft and Sim say they’re not an item, but it’s hard to believe when their music clearly says otherwise. --Vinnie Rugari
Mumford & Sons: Sigh No More English folk band Mumford & Sons’ debut album is almost perfect. It’s a little muddy in parts, and lots of the album sounds the same, but these are only small criticisms for an otherwise genius album. The buzz around this band is huge, mostly generated from their first single ‘Little Lion Man’, which is a wonderful fusion of folk, anti-folk, indie, acoustic, experimental, Celtic and about a dozen other influences. They’re headlining next year’s Laneway festival, and as a new band, this gives you an idea just how good they are.
They’re headlining next year’s Laneway festival, and as a new band, this gives you an idea just how good they are. Would the album have been successful ten years ago? Not at all. Will it be as popular in ten years? Probably not. Music, like all things, moves in themes. Sigh No More is the culmination of the last fifteen years of musical trends. In 2009, nobody’s making better music than Mumford & Sons. As a stand-alone record, and for the musical progress it represents, Sigh is probably the album of the year. --Ike Kutlaca
If I was Final Destination 3-D’s director David Ellis at the moment, I’d go back to stunt directing – his role before this film his first, and hopefully last, as director.
The movie is the biggest load of nonsense I’ve ever seen.
Final Destination 3D
The movie is the biggest load of nonsense I’ve ever seen. It’s not like the original Final Destinations that had believable circumstances that led up to the gory deaths – instead in this one there makebelieve forces pushing things to kill people.
Ever watched a shit movie and actually looked like an idiot while watching it? Go and see Final Destination 3-D, then you’ll know how it feels.
Apart from a few gory bits like where a girl is swallowed up in an escalator and a woman has her eye blown out by a rock (sorry to spoil the best of the movie in 27
Cups – a feat still unmatched by an English manager. Not David Peace, whose novel The Damned United is his largely fictional interpretation of Clough’s tenuous and forgettable 44-day spell at Leeds United – the last thing you’d expect to be adapted into a feature film.
It’s a shame Hollywood is venturing into this department. If they could hone in on the memorable gory horrors like Hostel I would be forever grateful. --Benjamin Strick
bigger and better things – and in this context The Damned United becomes the portrait of an obstacle that is eventually hurdled. Critics have pointed at the numerous factual errors in the storyline, but that’s by the by. The Damned United never claims to be a perfect historical artefact – it’s one man’s visual interpretation of what must have been going on behind the scenes at Leeds during Clough’s reign. And for what it is, it’s fantastic.
The Damned United never claims to be a perfect historical artefact – it’s one man’s visual interpretation of what must have been going on behind the scenes --Vinnie Rugari at Leeds during Clough’s 8.0/10.0 reign. And for what it is, it’s fantastic.
The Damned United Brian Clough, the best manager England’s national football team never had, deserves a biopic. Most would set it around the time of his reign at Nottingham Forest, where he led them to two consecutive European
Adapted for the screen by Peter Morgan, whose previous work includes The Last King of Scotland, The Queen, Frost/Nixon and State of Play, The Damned United was always going to be in good hands. Indeed, Clough is played brilliantly by Michael Sheen, who captures his charismatic, erratic genius perfectly as he battles with the board, the players and the fans to prove himself. Of course, we know that Clough goes onto
The standard issue 3-D Ray-Ban lookalike glasses make the screen leap out and hit you in the face. I’m not afraid to mention that in some parts of Final Destination I literally shifted in my own seat to avoid the 3-D post gouging my eye out. But this is the only good thing about the movie. So good in fact if Elmo was in 3-D I’d choose it over this.
words) there is nothing worth seeing. It’s these scenes that appealed to the onlymale audience around me at the time I saw it. The original Final Destinations were great, with their over-the-top gore and carnage, but when it’s in 3-D all of those great kill graphics go out the window. Turning the film 3-D would have strapped the budget of the film right back in every other sector. You can see this by the cheap actors, shit computer graphics and piss poor story line.
Movember Is coming to an upper lip near you We are now calling all men to throw away their shavers for the month of November. Before the female population at Bond cast their unwavering disapproval of your flavour saver, consider that you will be admired and respected around campus for putting your sex appeal on the line for our noble cause— Prostate cancer & men’s depression. Prizes include: •Highest Fundraising Prize •Man of Movember – Best Mo •Miss Movember – Most supportive female •Catfish Award – Worst Mo •Dirty Sanchez Award – for pure filth For all those battling with the prepuberty “Catfish”...I have compiled a few dietary tips to boost your testosterone intake and get that completive edge! Testosterone Food Sources Testosterone is known as the “Hehormone” -- the essence of a man. • Zinc: The best source of dietary zinc is chicken and salmon. • Peanuts, Beans • Vitamin A: found in fruit, leafy greens (spinach) and brightly colored vegetables like tomatoes, red peppers and yellow squash. N.B Fish oil is a ‘sex hormone inhibitor’. So stay off this oil if you are going for
the Man of Movember! p.s. testosterone supplements from a pharmacy are strictly encouraged! “Mirror Mirror on the Wall…who is the hairiest of them all!!” - Snow White THE RULES: 1. No shaving from midnight 1/11/09 until 26/11/09 2. Register online www.movember.com. au (team Bond Uni) 3. Legvember is open to all women, members of the Bond Cycling Club and Liam Auer (Congrats on the Sports Award). THE FINALE • Movember @ Dons, Thursday 25th, Week 11. • Prized will be voted, announced, awarded and presented. • Come and see the female population of Bond cry with overwhelming relief. So gents, if you are keen to grow a mo in the name of charity then email Andrew Dennis at email@example.com. edu.au Feel free to nickname your mo; soup strainer, caterpiller, flavour saver, nose neighbour, molestache, Szyslak, cookie duster, whiskers, mouth brow, tickler and lip curtain!! Cheers, Yours truly, Kindest regards, Up yours, ANDREW DENNIS & WILL CUNDY
In the past 30 years, the suicide rate for males aged 15 to 25yrs tripled. SOME FACTS FROM BEYOND BLUE * One in six Australian men is affected by depression at any given time. * Four times more young men than young women commit suicide (ABS). * The experience of male depression is complicated by the fact that men are more likely than women to shy away from medical treatment of any kind. Instead of discussing psychological problems, or seeking appropriate treatment, men may turn to alcohol and drugs when they are depressed or anxious. * In the past 30 years, the suicide rate for males aged 15 to 25yrs tripled. SOME FACTS FROM THE PROSTATE CANCER FOUNDATION OF AUSTRALIA * Each year in Australia, close to 3000 men die of prostate cancer - equal to the number of women who die from breast cancer annually. * One in nine men in Australia will develop prostate cancer in their lifetime * Depression affects one in six men, untreated depression is a leading risk factor for suicide
I ♥ Erix Banana KATHERINE MANSTED
17 Emmasculata’s goal was to recapture her young, but mentallydeficient King, the beautiful Erix Banana, who had fled Ugropia in the arms of the fruity Paris of Twoy. As usual, the evening was one of entertainment and hilarity. Rowan Kendall, spectator and BIRO member said, “I have now been to all three Propagandas, and I can safely say that Erix Banana was the best yet.”
seduction to convince their citizens (the audience) of the righteousness of their cause.
A big thank you to all of our competitors, who (among other things) screamed, danced, sang, dressed in fishnets and fashioned their own wreaths as well as to our judges: Mark Dinnen, Joel Butler and Tina Hunter, who mostly were in a state of shock. Congratulations to our winner, Brady Lowe our runnerup, Mitch Gollan and the best-dressed competitor, Les Preston.
In 093, the facts were as follows: The violent eunuch army of ‘Ugropia’ (represented by bearded monarch, Queen Emmasculata) had just landed on the beaches of the fashion-conscious, bird-watching, city-state of ‘Twoy’. Queen
If you’re somebody who lurks about the Bond campus on a Sunday afternoon on a regular basis, you may have been surprised this semester to find a group of thespians occupying the amphitheatre rehearsing for Bond’s upcoming play: ‘Away’. As you moved stealthily behind the bushes, underneath a loose-fitting paver or hid yourself well behind a street lamp, you would have noticed the talented cast which appears to have been plucked from most areas of Bond life; unifying to bring you the magic of live theatre. And so what is ‘Away’? A mystical journey by prolific playwright Michael Gow set in the Australian summer of 1967/68 where three families embark on their summer vacations, each holiday revealing a set of issues that the family has chosen to ignore for quite some time. The main cast including Alan White, Andrea Gronke, Ricky Macourt, Maddie Bone, Liz Rowland, Rowan Kendall, Jimmy Oldfield, Gabi Sarroff, Jack Cranwell and Susie Forder, the ensemble of Tessa Dignam, Jillian Thomsen and Millie Ruig combined with directors Jaimie Wolbers, Mel Storey and Tassie Williams will blow you away: ‘Away’ will be a night not to miss. Bring your picnic rugs, sleeping bags, pillows, deck chairs and bean bags along so that you can snuggle up and enjoy the performance to be held in the ADCO amphitheatre on Friday November 27 (Week 11).
Tickets are on sale from Week 8 under the arch and via online ticketing. Add us on Facebook for all of your ‘Away’ updates ‘Bond University Drama Society’
Clubs & Societies
Every semester, the Bond International Relations Organisation (BIRO) hosts its signature event, Propaganda. Propaganda is a persuasive public-speaking competition with a twist. Competitors are given a facts dossier containing a mock international relations dispute. Their task: to act as the leader of one of the disputing States and to use their powers of persuasion, creativity and
My name isn’t Elmo, but you can tickle me anytime you want to.
1 2 3
The word of the day is “legs”. Let’s go back to my room and spread the word.
10 11 12
Hi, I’m Batman. Wanna see my batmobile?
I play the field, and it looks like I just hit a home run with you!
Hello. Cupid called. He says to tell you that he needs my heart back.
Your body is a wonderland... Can I be Alice?
Really like your peaches and I wanna shake your tree.
I’ve got skittles in my mouth...want to taste the rainbow?
Your Dad must be a terrorist because baby you da bomb!
Is your Dad a parking inspector because you’ve got fine written all over you.
If you were a burger at McDonald’s you’d be McGorgeous.
Baby you must be a broom, because you just swept me off my feet!
You look so good, I could put you on a plate and sop you up with a biscuit.
You’re like a prize winning fish, I don’t know whether to eat you or mount you.
HOT OR NOT
I love every bone in your body...especially mine.
My socks are having a party, do your pants want to come down?
NOT Bond boys Fish at the bra Mid-semester exams American basketball shorts Cheap champagne Arachibutyrophobia – fear of peanut butter Hangovers stick to the top of your mouth Blue hair Papaphobia - fear of the Pope Jeggings (jean-like leggings) Trichophobia – fear of loose hairs Sunburn Spectrophobia – fear of mirrors Twitter The smell of the gym Nomophobia – fear of being out of mobile Bad manners phone contact Nailpolish on guys Phagophobia – fear of swallowing Losing student ID card Ephebiphobia – fear of teenagers iSnack 2.0 Scopophobia – fear of being looked at Birds at Cafe Bond
Do you work at Subway? Because you just gave me a foot long.
Bits & Pieces
HOT Bond girls Post exam slam Movember Mao’s Last Dancer Sunday Sesh at Billy’s Beach house Rotaract date auction Steaks at Dons Big Day Out tickets Byron Bay 90’s pop music Spring Racing Carnival Young Love Flat Screen TV’s in the blocks Darryl from the Bra Timmy Trumpet Fountain swimming Cheap Tuesdays in Market Square Summer fruit
You turn my software into hardware
POSITIONS AVAILABLE BOND UNIVERSITY RUGBY CLUB Bond University Rugby Club is calling for applications for the below vacant positions… -
President Vice President Treasurer / Secretary Rugby Coordinator Touch Coordinator
Please send your résumé to Tim Lee via e-mail: firstname.lastname@example.org When applying please state your preferred position and if you would consider any of the other vacant positions. Applications close Sunday 1st November (Week 7) The committee elect will receive a sufficient handover period to assist them in a smooth transition into there newly appointed position.
WHAT’S ON AT BOND WEDNESDAY Wednesday by the Water Come down for a BBQ When: 12.00pm Where: Ornamental Lawns Costs: Free SAM, $4 Non-SAM Water Polo Training Come and play water polo - It’s a great way to have fun and keep fit. When: 6.00pm Where: Bond Swimming Pool Oktoberfest Tickets on sale under the arch from 12.00pm-2.00pm Costs: $10 SAM, $15 NON-SAM. Visit the Facebook page at http:// www.facebook.com/event. php?eid=158007953769&ref=ts. Contact Benedikt at benedikt.muench@ student.bond.edu.au for more information. Bond Uni Cycling (BUC) - FREE bike repairs When: 12.00pm (at Wednesday by the Water) Where: Ornamental Lawns
Res Wars – Trivia When: 5:45pm Where: Princeton Room Free pizza and apples THURSDAY Thursday Night at Don’s Come down to Don’s Tavern and have a great night of socialising and music. When: Doors open 7.30pm then buses leave at 12.00am Where: Don’s Tavern then onto Platinum Nightclub Costs: Free SAM, $5 NON-SAM, and $10 NonBond student. The original Date Auction, brought to you by Rotaract Make sure you get down to Don’s for your chance to bid on a date with Bond’s sexiest singles. All money raised will go to support ROMAC. When: 8.30pm Where: Don’s Tavern. On vs. Off Campus Mixed Netball When: 6.00pm-8.00pm. Where: Sports Hall.
To enter a team please email clongden@ student.bond.edu.au FRIDAY PGSA Vintage Dinner The Post grad Vintage Dinner is back in full force. Join staff and students for some cocktails and an exquisite three course dinner. It promises to be lovely evening. Tickets can be purchased by contacting Diana Knight (diana. email@example.com) or online: www. bondstudents.com/busashop/misc/vintagepostgraduate-dinner/. When: 6:30 cocktails, 7:30 Dinner Where: University Club. Costs: $30 SAM/ $45 Non-SAM.
SATURDAY Canadian Law Students Association proudly presents - 2009 Halloween Party When: Don’s Tavern opens at 6.00pm and buses leave to the Drink Nightclub 8:30pm SHARP Where: Don’s Tavern then the Drink Nightclub Costs: $10 SAM and $ 15 NON-SAM Tickets on sale under the arch