Week 4 Sem 122
scope Scope is proudly brought to you by BUSA and a dedicated group of student volunteers. Scope: By STUDENTS for STUDENTS
PUBLICATIONS DIRECTOR EDITOR IN CHIEF GRAPHIC DESIGNER Jorja-Lee Wallace
MUSIC, ARTS & REVIEWS EDITOR | Emily McGregor SUB-EDITOR | Jonathan Dodd SPORT EDITOR | Rebecca Thompson SUB-EDITOR | Linda Woelk PHOTOGRAPHERS Shaun Rotman Jona Villanueva Mitchell Willocks SPONSORSHIP Michael ‘Papa’ Penklis DEADLINES Space Reservation: Sunday 4pm Completed content: Monday 4pm CONTACT Editor: firstname.lastname@example.org. edu.au General: email@example.com Phone: (07) 5595 4009
COVER PHOTO: Shaun Rotman CONTRIBUTORS: Christopher Land | Ashley Stark | Ava Anastasia | Shannan Carroll | Stephanie Smith | Brent Loeskow | Shintaro Koido | Paris Faint | Andy Kiggundu | Hannah West | Maximillian Wolthers | Jeremy Fitzpatrick | LSA | Jack Reid | David Brown The views and opinions expressed in Scope do not necessarily represent those of the Scope team, the Publications Director or BUSA. facebook.com/scope.bond bondstudents.com
SCOPE | ISSUE 24 CONTENTS
FEATURES EDITOR | Shannan Carroll SUB-EDITOR | Bonnie Whitehead SUB-EDITOR | Kyle Manning
3. FROM THE DESK OF 4. 42ND ST. GALLEN SYMPOSIUM 6. HAUTE-COMFORT CUISINE 7. CONTROLLING YOUR FEARS 8. INTRODUCING: FRESHMAN COUNCIL 2012 9. THE BOND INVESTMENT
GROUP INVESTMENT BANKING COMPETITION 10. PHOTOS 12. POSTERS 14. MUSIC, ARTS & REVIEWS 16. SPORT 18. BONDY BANTER 20. OF THE WEEK 22. POSTERS 24. WHAT’S ON
FROM THE DESK OF E
ach semester, BUSA allocates its 65 per cent portion of SAM funds to support a diverse range of student events, interests groups and services. As the fabric of our campus culture, SAM allows students to broaden their horizons, socialise at a university level, participate in sporting and academic competitions, and promotes the welfare of all students. In an historic moment, last week BUSA delivered its first budget under compulsory SAM; representing the largest budget BUSA has ever handed down. Riding on the back of increased funds and significantly increased membership, student expectations are certainly high. And why shouldn’t they be? Everyone expects more services, everyone expects clubs to receive more funding, and most importantly, everyone expects a greater bang for their buck. Under compulsory SAM, BUSA has a clear mandate to cater for each and every student. With this in mind, we have allocated as fairly and as responsibly as possible. So, how do you get your money’s worth this semester? In five words: it is up to you! Although SAM funds may support and facilitate a first-class student experience, the responsibility rests with each student to maximise the value of their SAM. If you are seeking to do so, there are plenty of avenues available – even if you aren’t a gym gunkie! For starters, I strongly encourage you to sign-up today to one of our many active clubs that interest you. For more information on how to become involved and maximise your SAM, feel free to visit BUSA on BondSync or Facebook, or pop into the BUSA Office anytime Monday-Friday, 9am-4pm. 122 Funding Applications The Activities Fee Committee was extremely impressed with the wide range of excellent funding applications, ranging from Turbo Youth to the IT Society, from the Exploration Society to the Bond Animal Welfare League. Overall, including provisional clubs, 67 comprehensive applications were submitted. We are in for a jam-packed semester so don’t sit back and watch the show, become involved and enjoy it. At a glance: Entity %Allocated BUSA 36.52 Capital Expenditure 10.40 Bondstock 4.95 Scope 3.25 Faculty Student Associations 16.40 Cultural Clubs 15.49 Sporting Clubs 12.99
Funding Review Seminar This week on Friday at 12pm in 06_4_11 (Case Study 1) is the Funding Review Seminar. The purpose of this session is: to explain the Funding Allocation Process, to provide an overview of this semester’s budget, and most importantly, to provide students with the opportunity to ask questions on particular allocations. If you’re wondering where your SAM funds go, it will be well worth your time! In the interim, please feel free to download the Master Budget, available from BondSync (BUSA org – Files – Club Administration). Funding Review Process To promote greater transparency and fairness, we will be trialling a review process this semester. Until Week 5 Friday, clubs are entitled to apply for a review of their allocation on any of the following grounds: • New information has become available that was not otherwise known at the time of the club’s Funding Meeting; • For reasons outside the club’s control (for example, significantly revised quotes); • If the allocated funds are insufficient for the event to proceed; • Reasonable belief that relevant criteria were not considered by BUSA and/or the Activities Fee Committee in the Funding Allocation process; or • Any other special circumstances. You are welcome to apply for a review to the BUSA Executive at firstname.lastname@example.org, which will review your application within seven days. If your application for review is successful, funds will be reallocated from the BUSA Extra Provision to your club. And, did you know this semester... • Highest application: PGSA – $21403. • Lowest application: BUGLEE (Gay, Lesbian and Everything Else Club) – $87. • Average request per club: $3382. • Average allocation per club: $1562. • BondSync costs $2600 per semester. • Bread at WBTW costs $75. • Clubs that received >80% of requested funds: Animal Welfare, BUGLEE, Debating Union, Turbo Youth, Badminton, Ball Hockey, Cricket, Ultimate Frisbee, Tennis, Touch. • Each Scope copy costs $2.016. • Each students saves $0.25 by not having a SAM sticker. • The total budget was 65.67% of the requested amount.
THE TREASURER WORDS | Christopher Land
THE EDITOR WORDS | Jorja Wallace
his week marks the end of a Scope Sub-Committee era for our very lovely and very talented, Shannan Carroll, who will be leaving her Features Section Editor post, but hopefully not the pages of Scope. I’d just like to publicly thank her for her service to students, and wish her all the best for the future. As one door closes, another opens - and with that we welcome our newest members, Caroline Stanley (Features SubEditor), and Monique Seivers (Advertising Manager). I’m sure they will bring their own interesting touch to Scope, and I look forward to working with them for the remainder of my term. Also, Bonnie Whitehead, a long-serving Scope Sub-Editor, will move into the position of Features Section Editor, and I’m confident she’s more than capable at continuing the excellent work of her predecessor. Week 4 typically marks that horrible realisation that the semester is well and truly underway, and that it is actually time to start preparing AND attending those tutorials. For those that are already knee-deep in assignments - good luck, and don’t forget to look after your health, especially in this icy winter weather. To those that have escaped the assignment chokehold for the moment - you lucky bastards, I hope you’re enjoying all the wonder that OverGrad has to offer. You may have noticed by now that we’re a little light on for content this week, with a baby 24-page edition marking Issue 24. Fitting really. That doesn’t mean you should toss Scope aside, because good things come in small packages. Not only do we have reflections (pgs.4-5), recipes (pg.6) and Palaver photos (pg.10); we also have our new regular sections ‘Bondy Banter’ (pgs.18-19) and ‘Of The Week’ (pgs.10-21) guaranteed to provide you with procastination-worthy material. Don’t forget - if you’d like to contribute, we’d like to hear from you! It doesn’t matter who you are, what you’re studying or where you’re up to in your degree (sounds a little like a Backstreet Boys’ song...) - you’re more than welcome to submit to Scope! Scope is here for you, so get around it - in, on and around. Most important thing to remember - the deadline is strictly 4pm Monday. That’s it from me this week - I hope to see you out supporting the PGSA at Cougars and Cradle-robbers tomorrow night, Shades of Grey Friday night, and don’t forget that everemotional celebration of those set to leave us - Grad Party 122, Saturday night. Until next week,
JW SCOPE | ISSUE 24 FROM THE DESK OF
42ND ST. GALLEN SYMPOSIUM WORDS & IMAGE | Ashley Stark
IN MAY THIS YEAR,
FOUR BOND STUDENTS ATTENDED THE 42ND ST. GALLEN SYMPOSIUM IN ZURICH, SWITZERLAND. ASHLEY STARK DETAILS HER EXPERIENCE.
SCOPE | ISSUE 24 FEATURES
n December 2011, I received an e-mail from BUSA Post-Graduate Liaison and PGSA President, Thinesh Thillai, regarding an upcoming essay competition, the Wings of Excellence Award, for a symposium in May of the following year. After exploring the website of the symposium, I was immediately impressed with the proposed content; and in January of this year I submitted an essay to the International Student’s Committee (ISC) of the annual St. Gallen Symposium. I was delighted to receive an e-mail two months later notifying me of my success in making the top 100 essays submitted. By April I had my travel itinerary sent out, and was subsequently flown out at the end of the month alongside the 99 other successful applicants. Our 100 comprised half of the Leaders of Tomorrow of the 42nd St. Gallen Symposium. The other half consisted of people who were hand selected by members of the ISC, their employers and some of the top universities in the world. This group of 100 people were the top in their field under the age of thirty. They comprised of scientists, young entrepreneurs, researchers, engineers, journals, and policy makers (to name a few). The remaining attendees were an international collection of several hundred researchers, CEOs, politicians, diplomats, and constituents of major corporations; all thriving in their fields (despite the repercussions of the GFC), and all eager to engage with the our generation over the course of the symposium.
In the weeks leading up to the symposium I was thrilled to discover that there were not only several other people from Australia attending the symposium, but in fact three other students from Bond University (a rather impressive figure considering we were four selected out of approximately 800 entries, evaluated solely on essay criteria). I attended the symposium alongside Jonathan Holtby (Masters in Communications), Osama Al Haddad (Masters in International Relations), and William Demers (JD Program, Faculty of Law). Ironically enough, although three out of the four of us are all enrolled in programs from the Faculty of Humanities and Social Sciences, I did not actually have the privilege of meeting the three of them until arriving at the symposium in Switzerland. My week in St. Gallen began after nearly two days of travel: twenty-seven hours; three international flights; four countries; and an experience that made tangible my pre-existing awareness of Australia’s extreme distance from the rest of the planet. By 7pm Monday, April 30, I finally arrived at the Zurich International Airport. There, I was fortunate enough to be in the immediate company of fellow Leaders of Tomorrow, Jelena Petrovic (PhD candidate at King’s College, London), Sam Kleiner (PhD candidate at Oxford University), and Pedro de Cristo (a Harvard graduate now running a political campaign in his hometown of Rio de Janeiro, Brazil). Day One proved to work on a rather
steep learning curve. The majority of the morning involved networking with my fellow LOTs - an experience that was both intimidating and inspiring. The vast majority of the people I met within the first hour all appeared to be citizens of the world. From the USA but working for the Republic of Korea in Geneva. Born in South Africa, but of Italian descent, and now starting up a business in New Zealand. A rocket scientist for NASA now doing a Masters at Oxford in the UK. By the end of morning tea I was thanking the universe for at least granting me my dual-country studentship for the sake of conversation. The pre-programme commenced with Dr. Peter Day warming up the crowd, and continued with the initial group collaboration on the debate topic: In the long run, the West will prevail. Given the nature of my paper and my overall view on recent trends toward globalisation from where I am presently situated, I elected to side with the opposition. Being in this group I was fortunate enough to experience public speaking virtuosos Robtel Pailey (PhD candidate at the University of London), and Saul Garlick (CEO of ThinkImpact), passionately address the rest of the opposing crowd. A mere glimpse of what was to come later in the week with respect to this topic. The preliminary debate was followed by an afternoon session headlined by Accenture, and chaired by Steve Culp, managing director of their Department of Risk Assessment. The second day of my pre-programme was held at Kantonstrassaal, located in the centre of some of St. Gallen’s most prominent historical sites. The day was headlined by Price Waterhouse Cooper, and chaired by their Leader of Markets, Dr. Urs Landoff. I truly enjoyed Dr. Urs Landoff ’s ability to address and work with our team of LOTs. With him came a sense of sincerity that opened the day on a very positive note. I must also commend former FBI agent, Edward Gibson, for his quick witted speech in which he noted that even he (the once “pimply faced teenager”) had his own insecurities to overcome, and that we were all deserving attendees at this years symposium. The highly interactive day at Kantonstrassaal ended around 5pm. Despite the fact that it had already been a nine-hour day, we headed off in one giant group to the university for the introductory panel to the symposium. The panel was led by macroeconomic strategist Tomáš Sedlácek, and Leaders of Tomorrow Pancham Gajjar (MBA student at London Business School), and Daisuke Kan [executive director of Cheerio Group]. Overall, the panel was both an interesting end to the day, and a thought provoking start to the symposium. And so finally the day arrived. May 3. Day One of the symposium. The morning began with a more than warm welcome by Vice Chairman of Goldman Sachs, Lord Griffiths of Fforestfach, who began the symposium on a strong and positive note. This was followed by a welcome by both the Chairman of the St. Gallen Foundation for International Studies, Josef Ackerman, and the Vice President of Switzerland, Ueli Maurer. The Chairman of Swiss Re, one of Switzerland’s leading re-insurance companies, Walter Keilholz then addressed the crowd before the first panel. The first panel (as was the trend with
most of panels) contained a very diverse range of members, and as such, stimulated some very interesting conversation. Addressing the issue of policy-making under extreme circumstances were Minister in the Presidency of South Africa, Trevor A. Manuel; Former Prime Minister of the Hellenic Republic, George A. Papandreou; member of the National Council of the Slovak Republic, Richard Sulik; and Financial Times Associate Editor, Wolfgang Münchau. Given the extreme circumstances, especially within Europe, this was an interesting topic that I think could have discussed for much longer than the 60 minutes allotted (I personally enjoyed hearing Papandreou’s thoughts on the current state of Greece). The second panel of the day involved Chairman of the Board of Management of Munich Re, Dr. Nikolaus von Bromhard; Chairman of one of India’s leading industrial houses, Sanjiv Goenka; Chairman of Syngenta International, Martin Taylor; and Lord Griffiths Fforestfach. This panel addressed the notion of innovation with respect to risk-taking. The morning closed with a rather colourful one-on-one session between former President of the European Central Bank, Jean-Claude Trichet, and BBC presenter Stephen Sackur (who, on a side note, is one of the most quick-witted men I have had the pleasure of witnessing in conversation). They discussed measures taken in Europe following the GFC, and where things stand now with respect to Europe’s economy and the rest of the world; a conversation fraught with controversy given Trichet’s resistance to political pressure and attempts to establish liquidity in the market, despite the implementation of rigid austerity measures. The day’s sessions closed with Professor George S. Day from the University of Pennsylvania and Dr. Andreas Jacobs, Chairman of the Board of Barry Callebaut AG, addressing the notion of being proactive and acting on weak signals. At 8am the next morning, the President of Guggenheim International, Mark Medish, made his welcome speech for the day. This was followed by a one-on-one between the former Finance Minister of Germany, Peer Steinbrück, and the Foreign Policy Editor for Neue Zurcher Zeitung, Eric Gujer, who discussed Germany and Europe’s reaction to the GFC, and Germany’s challenges in particular post-2007. Then it was on to the first panel of the day (and by far my favourite of the symposium). Director General of the International Atomic Energy Agency (IAEA), Yukiya Amano; Professor Pervez A. Hoodbhoy of Pakistan; Chairman of the Munich Security Conference, Wolfgang Ischinger; and CNN’s John K. Defterios, addressed the issue of a nuclear threat on an international scale. In addition to the relief of having a break from the largely financial and economics focussed panels up until this point, I found what each panel member had to say interesting (albeit terrifying at times), and I truly appreciated Professor Hoodbhoy’s blunt but honest answers surrounding the existence of nuclear weaponry in his country. The plenary sessions recommenced after lunch with an even more colourful one-onone between Greenpeace’s Dr. Kumi Naidoo, and BBC’s Stephen Sackur. I understand that Greenpeace, and Dr. Kumi Naidoo in particular, has
come under fire, with some accusing him of being too ‘soft’ with his policies following the resignation of Gerd Leipold; but I still consider him to be an agent of this world working to make this planet a better place to live, and I appreciated Dr. Kumi Naidoo’s honest, and often humorous, responses to Stephen Sackur’s coloured commentary. The afternoon continued with German Sociologist, Professor Ulrich Beck, and a panel with Managing Director of Bajaj Auto Ltd., Rajiv Bajaj; Fitch Group President, Paul Taylor; and University of St. Gallen’s Managing Director Dr. Miriam Meckel, addressing the managerial side of risk-taking.
After experiencing what an incredible opportunity this whole process has afforded us, and what an inspiring experience we were provided with as a result, I am confident that other members of the student population, as well as the staff, here at Bond University would not only benefit, but thrive at such a remarkable event.
The final panel addressed the issue of emerging risk from a business standpoint, and included Chairman of HSBC Holdings, Douglas J. Flint; CEO of Glencore International AG, Ivan Glasenberg; CEO of India’s Infosys Technologies, S.D. Shibulal; the Minister of Trade of Indonesia, Gita Wirjawan; and CNN’s John K. Defterios. This was another extremely diverse group of individuals to witness engaging in discussion, and I particularly enjoyed H. E. Gita Wirjawan’s optimistic, but informative, insight on the anticipated development of Indonesia in the next coming years, particularly in the area of postsecondary education. The evening ended with a philosophical interpretation of risk by Dr. Peter Sloterdijk. I thought Dr. Sloterdijk provided the audience with an interesting, and certainly more abstract, perspective on modern day risk. In closing I would just like to say that this symposium is truly unlike any other. It is progressive and innovative. It is motivational and diverse. It sets an extremely high standard on all fronts, and attempts to bridge the gap between this generation and the next; allowing for young, talented, and invaluable members of the international community to set their skills to practice and collaborate as a group. I think the student population of Bond University would benefit greatly from increased awareness and participation in this symposium. Jonathan, William, Osama, and myself were fortunate enough to be prompted to submit entries into this essay competition. After experiencing what an incredible opportunity this whole process has afforded us, and what an inspiring experience we were provided with as a result, I am confident that other members of the student population, as well as the staff, here at Bond University would not only benefit, but thrive at such a remarkable event.
SCOPE | ISSUE 24 FEATURES
HAUTE-COMFORT CUISINE WORDS | Ava Anastasia
SERVES US WITH THE IDEAL RECIPE FOR A WARM NIGHT IN THIS WINTER.
lthough winter on the Gold Coast rarely dips lower than 19°C, it does get a little chilly for us hot-blooded individuals. With this in mind, I’ve combined my favourite elements of winter cuisine to combat that bone-chilling Archway breeze. Allow me to present my signature Lamb Ragu with Polenta Gnocchi and, for after, a Turkish Delight Meringue Cake, to both refresh and comfort your palate. For more of Ava’s food adventures and wisdom, follow her at http:// www.facebook.com/MyFirstWordWasCake Lamb Ragu with Polenta Gnocchi The Ragu can be made a day or two in advance - the flavours will develop further as they have time to mingle. For the ragu 2kg lamb shoulder (trimmed), 1/4 cup olive oil, 1 teaspoon seasalt flakes, 2 brown onions, 5 cloves of garlic (roughly chopped), 1/2 bottle of red wine, 1 litre of chicken stock, 800g crushed tomatoes, 1 punnet cherry tomatoes, 10 sprigs of thyme, 1/2 tsp ground black pepper, 1/2 tsp ground nutmeg. 1. Heat oil in deep pot on medium heat, then brown salted lamb on each side and remove from pot. 2. Add garlic and brown onions, frying until sheer. 3. Pour in wine, stock and crushed tomatoes. 4. Place lamb in pot, seasoning with pepper and nutmeg. 5. Scatter over thyme and cherry tomatoes. 6. Pour over water to cover. 7. Bring to the boil, cover with lid and reduce to low heat. 8. Cook for six hours, or until meat is falling from bone. 9. Remove meat and reduce liquid to a third of its original quantity over medium heat with leftover bones. 10. Remove bones, add meat to liquid and simmer for five minutes before serving. For the gnocchi 350g polenta, 1 litre of milk, 100g of butter, 20g parmesan (grated), 3 egg yolks. 1. Bring milk to a boil over medium heat, then whisk in polenta in a slow stream. 2. Stir with a wooden spoon until thick and smooth (20 minutes). 3. Mix in half the butter, parmesan, then egg yolks. 4. Line a deep 20cm x 35cm baking tray with oiled baking paper. 5. Spoon in polenta mix, smoothing over with a wet palette knife or spoon. 6. Cover with baking paper and refrigerate for 30 minutes. 7. Once set, use a cookie cutter to create cylindrical forms. 8. Melt remaining butter in a pan and fry polenta gnocchi until golden. 9. Place on a dish and surround with ragu.
Turkish Delight Meringue Cake The meringues can be baked a day ahead, but the cake must be assembled with the tainted cream and slathers of sensual chocolate on the day. The cake can be left unrefrigerated for several hours during winter and serves six. Rosewater meringues 6 egg whites, 440g caster sugar, 2 tbsp rosewater, 1 tbsp cornflour, 1-1/2 tsp white vinegar. 1. Preheat oven to 180°C. 2. Beat egg whites until soft peaks form, then slowly add sugar until glossy. 3. Fold in rosewater, cornflour and vinegar. 4. Line 2-3 baking trays with baking paper and draw circles with 10cm, 15cm and 20cm diametres. 5. Spoon meringue onto templates and smooth with a rubber spatula. 6. Place in oven, reducing the temperature to 120°C. 7. Bake for 45 minutes, then turn off oven and leave until meringues are completely cooled. For the filling 300ml of thickened cream, 1/4 cup caster sugar, 1/2 tsp vanilla bean paste, 1 tbsp rosewater, 2 punnets of raspberries. 1. Beat cream, sugar, vanilla and rosewater in a bowl until the cream holds its shape. 2. Set aside. To top 70g dark chocolate (melted and slightly cooled), 40g pistachios (toasted and cooled). 1. Place the largest meringue on the bottom of a serving platter. 2. Top with half of the cream filling and place half the raspberries around the edge. 3. Place the medium-sized meringue on top, then add the rest of the cream and raspberries. 4. Top with the smallest meringue and drizzle with chocolate, using a spoon. 5. Scatter pistachios on top and leave until chocolate is set.
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SOMETIMES YOU JUST
HAVE TO BITE THE BULLET AND FACE YOUR FEARS SO YOU DON’T MISS OUT ON WHAT LIFE HAS TO OFFER.
CONTROLLING YOUR FEARS WORDS | Shannan Carroll
verybody’s afraid of something. I’m probably afraid of more than most - spiders, enclosed spaces, soup (that last one’s a recent addition). But I find that fear is an emotion of degree; you can be anxious, scared, terrified, or petrified. You can shake a little, wipe your sweaty palms on your jeans; or you can lose all capacity for rational function. I harbour two particular fears that have traditionally manifested in the latter symptom: flying, and heights. The first time I caught a plane, at roughly four or five-years-old, I hung onto my grandmother’s leg and screamed hysterically for a rather sustained period of time. At least, that’s how the family folklore goes. I begged not to be forced to board the jet. I didn’t want to see America; didn’t want to go to Disneyland. More recently, in 2010, while waiting to board a flight to Europe, I had the ‘adult’ version of a fright-induced tantrum: a panic attack. I hyperventilated. I shook uncontrollably to the point where it was hard to walk. I couldn’t eat. My mother and travelling companion started seriously considering whether travel insurance would cover the cost of our entire holiday, or whether a beyond irrational fear of flight would be deemed a pre-existing psychological condition. I still don’t know how I got on the plane. Interestingly though, this was not the first time I’d flown since my days as a five-year-old screamer. I’d flown inter-state and international since then. Sometimes I coped OK, sometimes I was an embarrassment to those travelling with me. I recall one particular flight back from Sydney when I suddenly decided I was extremely hot and needed to get off the plane immediately. You get the picture: I’m more than just tentative about being up in the air. In part I blame it on my profound distaste for heights. I discovered I was afraid of heights during my Grade Six School Camp, when the camp leaders asked me to physically take the metaphori-
cal leap of faith (i.e. climb up a tree and jump off it). To be honest, I’m yet to decide if this exposed, or rather induced, my fear of being up in the air. Suffice to say it’s been a far more acute concern since that day. On holiday to visit my family in Europe a few years ago, my aunt and uncle thought it a wonderful idea to take me to Jungfraujoch. I was told it was the highest point that can be reached in Europe without climbing gear. I don’t know if that’s true, but a quick Google search has confirmed that at the peak sits the highest railway station in Europe. I didn’t quite realise the precariousness of my situation until it was far too late. That is, until I was sitting in a chain-link train carriage, travelling at a near-vertical trajectory up the edge of a sheer cliff-face. At the top, I had another of those ‘adult tantrums’. I couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t stand. Well, I couldn’t stand until I realised I was about to miss the first train back down the mountain and took off at the fastest pace I could manage to throw myself into my means of salvation. Even to me, that description now sounds slightly melodramatic; at the time, it couldn’t have seemed more apt. My fear also managed to make extremely awkward a later family outing in the US. My uncle bought us all tickets to an American football game. Our seats were positioned right near the top rim of the stadium. I lasted about five minutes, then spent the rest of the game alternating between huddling in a stairwell (to avoid looking at any kind of view and realising my height), and wandering aimlessly through the gift shop (to defrost). In more recent years, I’ve come to realise the ridiculousness of my ways. I was letting wholly unnecessary concerns impact not only on my everyday life, but on moments that could have, and should have, been shared and unforgettable family experiences (for slightly more positive reasons than they are now). So I decided to take control. That’s right, I didn’t decide to conquer my
fears – I often wonder if it’s truly possible to be genuinely petrified of something, and then later have no qualms about the very same creature, activity, or state of being - but I decided they would no longer control me. I first gave physical effect to this affirmation on my 2010 trip to Europe (yes, that very same trip that I imperilled with my airport antics). First stop: Rome. First attraction: the Vatican. I climbed to the very top, and the views were worth every affirmation I hurled around in my brain on the journey up to keep myself from turning on my heel and bolting back down. Only a few weeks ago, during our semester break, I journeyed to Spain, and took a day trip from Barcelona to Montserrat, a nearby mountain home to an historic monastery. The roads were winding, and the peak was high. I didn’t take the chain-railway to the very, very top (I’d learned my lesson). But, unlike at Jungfraujoch, I managed to remain with the tour group for the entirety of our allocated time up the cliff – no emergency dash to the first descending train or bus required. I’m not saying I didn’t want to faint when we first arrived; I’m just saying that I didn’t. I even managed, after a time, to look at, and appreciate, the view. I read once in a Vogue article by Annie Stevens that “Fear isn’t always enormous, but it is always limiting”. I’ve discovered life’s more fun when you set your own limits.
You get the picture: I’m more than just tentative about being up in the air. In part I blame it on my profound distaste for heights.
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FRESHMAN COUNCIL 2012 8
WORDS | Stephanie Smith
MEET THE NEW FRESHMAN COUNCIL FOR 2012. The Freshman Council aims to educate students on the importance of charitable giving, by generating philanthropic awareness amoungst freshman, and by encouraging first year students to become more involved within the Bond community. The Freshman Council endeavours to plan, organise and facilitate at least one charitable event each semester specifically aimed at involving first year students in philanthropy at Bond.
Name: Olivia Whitt Degree: Architecture Sem Started: 121 If I had three wishes, I would wish: 1. For there to be more time in the day. 2. For afternoon naps to be officially scheduled into our timetable. 3. For there the more optimism and more idealism in the world.
Name: Jake Rischbieth Degree: Bachelor of Law/ Journalism Sem Started: 121 My funniest moment at Bond: Was definitely watching other freshers perform sex acts on office chairs during the O-Week Hypnotist Night in Semester 121.
Name: Chris White Degree: Bachelor of Law/Bachelor of IR (Bus) Sem Started: 121 If I had three wishes, I would wish: 1. That all the wishes the others made would be effective on me, so that as they made them, I would get them, but at my discretion. 2. That when the chicken crosses the road, its intentions are not ever questioned. 3. That Wally never got lost again.
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Name: Lily Newton Degree: Film and TV Sem Started: 121 If I could have any superpower it would be: The ability to speak Parseltongue.
Name: Jona Villanueva Degree: Bachelor of Law/International Relations Sem Started: 121 If I could have any superpower it would be: The ability to read minds.
Name: Hannah Meiklejohn Degree: Bachelor of Biomedical Science Sem Started: 121 If I could be any animal I’d be: Endangered. It’s only thanks to human advances in technology like shoes and GPS that I’ve managed to make it this far.
Name: Lily Brand Degree: Bachelor of Architecture Sem Started: 121 If I had three wishes, I would wish: 1. For the Bra to be refranchised into a Max Brenner Chocolate Restaurant. 2. For it to be legal to have pets at the blocks, because that will allow for the hypothesised mini zoo in the blocks courtyard. 3. For it to be socially acceptable to wear a set of onesie pyjamas around campus.
hat is the Bond Investment Group (BIG) Investment Banking Competition? The BIG Investment Banking Competition (the IB Competition for short) is an internal competition that will run on Saturday of Week Four this semester. The IB Competition ultimately aims to prepare students for the final stages of the intensive recruitment process that they must undergo in many investment banks. In short, students will be given a problem on Friday of Week Five that contains information on both a large listed Australian company, and several smaller listed Australian companies which present potential acquisition targets. Each group will have to present both fundamental and strategic arguments to a panel of judges (which represent a hypothetical Board of Directors), to demonstrate why the larger firm should seek to acquire one of the smaller firms. The IB Competition aims to prepare students for the intensive internship and graduate recruitment process that is often four or five stages long! This can consist of on-line testing, in-depth analysis of oneâ€™s resume, phone interviews, individual and group tasks, and individual panel interviews with several executives. The IB Competition will specifically prepare students for the group task element in the recruitment process,
in which groups of applicants are often given information concerning a large listed company and some smaller potential acquisition targets. Groups of applicants will be given limited time to develop a pitch to deliver to a Board of Directors concerning their recommendations in relation to which company the larger company should seek to acquire and why. How is it that the IB Competition will work? Teams will comprise of three students, and will be given their problem twenty-four hours before they are due to present. Each team is authorised to use laptop computers to create a PowerPoint presentation, and each team will be given 10 minutes to pitch their case to the panel of judges. This will be followed by five minutes of question time, in which the panel of judges will have an opportunity to assess how well teams are able to justify their opinions. Finally, there will be a five minute de-brief in which judges can provide students with feedback from which they can then learn and improve. Prizes will be awarded to the teams that deliver the best overall pitch, and for teams that deliver the best overall presentation. What if I know nothing about company valuation or mergers and acquisitions? Do not stress if you feel that you have little or no experience concerning company valuation or acquisitions. BIG will be running a bridging course at the beginning of Week Four that will explain some of the basic aspects of valuation, including comparable analy-
sis and comparable valuation. The judging panel will take into consideration that students have limited knowledge concerning company valuation and acquisitions, and will therefore judge students accordingly. Why should I participate in the IB Competition? There are two main reasons that students should participate in the IB Competition, aside from the fact that it will provide students with an edge over other applicants in the final stages of the recruitment process in investment banks. Firstly, there will be a generous prize pool for the winners in each category (best overall pitch and best overall presentation) that consists of cash prizes as well as free tickets for upcoming BIG events. Secondly, the event will be fully catered, with sandwiches, snacks and beverages provided for participants on the day. How do I sign up? Students can sign up for the IB Competition by emailing Brent Loeskow at brent. email@example.com. Due to time constraints, only six teams of three students can compete. Be quick to sign-up as nominations will be processed on a first in, first served basis! If you have any questions pertaining to this competition please contact Brent Loeskow at firstname.lastname@example.org
BIG BRINGS TO YOU A COMPETITION THAT AIMS TO PREPARE STUDENTS FOR THE INTENSIVE INTERNSHIP AND GRADUATE RECRUITMENT PROCESS.
WORDS | Brent Loeskow
THE BOND INVESTMENT GROUP INVESTMENT BANKING COMPETITION
SCOPE | ISSUE 24 FEATURES
WEEK THREE Photographers: Mitchell Willocks (pg.10) | Shaun Rotman (pg.11) Events: Palaver
SCOPE | ISSUE 24 PHOTOS
SCOPE | ISSUE 24 PHOTOS
THE CLASSICAL WORLD - FROM BEETHOVEN TO VINE REVIEW OF THE QUEENSLAND ORCHESTRA’S YOUTH SYMPHONY, 2 JUNE 2012
WORDS | Shintaro Koido
ost people like to say that once you go north of the Tweed, you’ve entered a whole new world. A barren, dilapidated, culture-less wasteland… but that’s not exactly true. There are literally hundreds of classical music groups that showcase the colours, the passion, and the intensity that is classical music. People always ask me why I’m such a classical music buff and nerd. “Isn’t it just for old people, posh snobby types and nerds?” Well no, classical music is a near-universal language, as it touches the same parts of the brain and heart in every human. People from South Africa to Japan approach classical music in similar ways. We should definitely celebrate classical music beyond the occasional remix on Channel V or the iTunes account. I was able to experience this on Saturday when I went to see the Queensland Orchestra’s Youth Symphony (QYS). QPAC’s dimly lit hall was packed to the rafters with passionate music aficionados cheering the musicians alongside first time concert audiences. From the first blaring trumpet entry, to the fanfare at the end of the two hour concert, the crowd was absolutely mesmerised by the talent of these musicians – many of them still in their late teens. John Curro AM MBE’s Orchestra performed an absolutely massive programme that showcased nearly 300 years of classical music, from the beloved Beethoven to one of the orchestra member’s compositions. There was definitely something for everyone to enjoy. The concert had two giants in the standard repertoire, Beethoven’s Piano Concerto No. 5, nicknamed the ‘Emperor’ performed by young Dalby-born soloist Jayson Gillham, and Mussorgsky’s Pictures at an Exhibition arranged by Ravel. In addition to this, the QYS played the ever-popular Strauss Jr’s Emperor
Waltz as an encore… The members of the audience who danced away like they were at an Andre Rieu concert surprised me. But classical music is not just something from ages past, it is still being created today, and the programme included two modern pieces, including Carl Vine’s Celebrare Celeberrime (a contemporary Australian composer – so there’s hope for you aspiring composers at Bond yet), and the world premiere of Fanfare for the Queensland Youth Symphony to celebrate their soon-to-depart tour to Asia and Europe. I’ve grown up with classical music, I’ve seen concerts around the world, and my brother’s studying at the Con; so it’s part of my DNA. But that shouldn’t stop anyone else from taking a bit of time out of their lives and go experience something that may profoundly change your life for the better. So I say to all you naysayers – get involved, try searching some classical music first, and then go see a concert; nothing beats taking your seat in the hall and experiencing the blast and passion roll off an 80-piece orchestra. As Nike says in its commercials: “Just do it.” Now why should you cool, young, hip students go and see more classical music concerts? 1. You might enjoy it – It includes over 500 years worth of composers ranging from America to Venezuela to France, so you’re bound to find something you’ll like! 2. As I said above – Nothing beats listening to Wagner or Richard Strauss in a concert hall with an 80-piece orchestra in front of you. 3. Learn something new – Get out of your comfort zone, appreciate the art, and who knows how useful this might be in a dinner conversation in the future? 4. It tickles every part of your brain – Logic, structure, memory, passion, increased IQ in short bursts, mathematics – it’s all there in classical music, and it can reach your very soul. 5. It’s classy.
MUSIC, ARTS & REVIEWS
BEN FOLDS FIVE BACK TOGETHER! REVIEW OF THE RELEASED SONG “DO IT ANYWAY”
WORDS | Paris Faint
adies and gents, my life was changed last week. I realized that for the last thirteen years I’ve been living in a purgatory of sorts, because in all that time I had been listening to Ben Folds Five whilst they have been disbanded. Well guess what everybody, that has now changed! I might have been a bit slow on the uptake (at least four months slow on the uptake) on one of the greatest discoveries I have ever made, but last week I was told that Ben Folds Five were getting back together to record a new album! I KNOW RIGHT - awesome that it’s happening, but disappointing that I found out so late. Ben Folds, Darren Jesse and Robert Sledge’s last official project was The Unauthorized Biography of Reinhold Messner, which featured some of the trio’s classics such as ‘Don’t Change Your Plans’, ‘Your Redneck Past’ and (my personal favourite from the album) ‘Army’. I bolted online as soon as I heard the amazing news and I listened to one of the pre-released tracks called ‘Do It Anyway.’ My future children will be happy when they are born because of the goodness I felt when I listened to that song. I’m not disputing that Ben Folds’ solo material is some of the best music in existence, but there is just something about the magic of the trio that creates a unique and quirky vibe that I am SO RELIEVED to say was not lost after thirteen long years of separation. ‘Do It Anyway’ starts off with a classic Folds’ riff, then incorporates a rolling Jesse drumbeat, and then finally a bouncy Sledge bass line. It’s honestly like they never broke up, and I could not be happier! We could be witnessing the birth of the new Whatever and Ever Amen, a new classic B.F.F. album. Everybody please go online now and download everything Ben Folds Five has ever created; if not for the pleasure of your ear canals, for the pleasure of knowing that one of the most awesome bands ever is back in the world once more. “Tell me what I said I’d never do, tell me what I said I’d never say. Read me off a list of things I used to not like but now I think are okay.” If you once didn’t like Ben Folds Five, or if you’ve never heard of the group, take the incognito advice of this lyric - go listen to them, just ‘Do It Anyway’.
SCOPE | ISSUE 24 MUSIC, ARTS & REVIEWS
t’s only fair that I write this review in order to articulate the musical brilliance of the biggest upcoming rappers in the hip hop music scene while listening entirely to his catalogue. It may seem somewhat of a contradiction that the upcoming rapper has a catalogue, however it’s more a testament to his dedication and his craft that within such a short period of time so much content has been produced. 2 Chainz, formerly known as Tity Boi (one half of the group Playa’s Circle), began rapping in 1997 in the group Playaz Circle (the word ‘Playaz’ being an acronym of Preparing Legal Assets for Years from A to Z). However, being known as ‘Tity Boi’ was not easy. He received a lot of criticism, and it was speculated that the name Tity Boi was coined for derogatory purposes towards women. Although he repeatedly denied the accusations, in early 2011 he decided to change his stage name to 2 Chainz, as he perceived it to be more ‘family friendly’. Following his name change, Epps released a mixtape titled T.R.U.
Realigon. The mixtape became his first album to appear on a music chart, peaking at number 58 on the US Billboard Top R&B/Hip-Hop Albums Chart. 2 Chainz’s success has been blowing up more than most other rappers in the hip hop scene lately. Within two semesters he went from a single song on a mix tape, to appearing on Nicki Minaj’s official anticipated album Roman Reloaded, as an unsigned artist. For individuals who are unfamiliar with the record business, independent artists who have no budget, no marketing, and no agent, don’t regularly experience this level of success. However, 2 Chainz is the exception, as he bootstrapped his way to success. His feature verses on the remixes, add a gutter, street element to a market there is generally been quite clean. His southern swag, amorphous wordplay and vocal clarity have instantly won the admiration of his critics and fellow artist with an outpouring of features.
2 CHAINZ WORDS | Andy Kiggundu
DO YOU NEED TO SEND FREIGHT OVERSEAS? SICK OF COMPARING PRICES THAT HUNDREADS OF FREIGHT COMPANIES ARE OFFERING TO FIND THE RIGHT DEAL? THEN LOOK NO FURTHER!
2 Chainz has become a household name in the hip-hop music scene. This was partly because of Nicki Minaj song ‘Beez In The Trap’, which features 2 Chainz. Minaj selected this song as the second track on her album, giving 2 Chainz a huge amount of exposure to the biggest demographic of individuals, those who follow her notoriously popular music. Since then the video on YouTube has 48 million views and his verse makes the track that much better. This has helped 2 Chainz transcend borders and reach an international and much more diversified audience, leading to his apparent success. As a result of this, 2 Chainz has gone on to make songs with Kanye West, Big Sean, Birdman, Lil Wayne, Meek Mill, Young Jeezy, Trey Songz, and T.I. He has also since released his debut album, Based On A T.R.U. Story, with the single ‘No Lies’ featuring Drake - pretty incredible. If you are familiar with the industry, you would know that it’s almost impossible to get a verse from Drake. It must be a sign that you are going to be hearing a lot more from this rising star. When I want to get crunk, rip it up, get hood, get street - there is nothing like 2 Chainz. His productions on tracks are heavy bass hitting, low grinding, street anthems. It would be shameful to play it low. Track down his mix tapes or hit him up on YouTube, and listen to Codeine Cowboy, T.R.U. REALigion (Hosted By DJ Drama).
Bondies International Freight has made contact with various freight companies who have been able to give us amazing discounts on sending freight overseas! All you have to do is log onto our Facebook page, find the company offering the best deal for your destination and give them a call. YES it is THAT EASY! Here is a testimonial from an international student currently enrolled at Bond University: “The last time I had to send my freight back home to Saudi Arabia, I was really confused because there were so many companies to choose from. The company I went with charged me $21 per kilo... I thought this was very expensive.” The price negotiated by Bondies International Freight for delivery to Saudi is $9.07/kg – that is less than HALF PRICE. But don’t take our word for it, check out the rates yourself by searching ‘Bondies International Freight’ on Facebook. Whether you’re sending stuff to Canada, Europe or Asia there is something there for you! *Bondies International freight (BIF) accepts no liability for lost or damaged goods. Once the student contacts the freight company, the transaction is between the company and the student, not BIF and the student.
SCOPE | ISSUE 24 MUSIC, ARTS & REVIEWS
SPORT BOND BULLSHARKS DID NOT GO DOWN WITHOUT A FIGHT WORDS | Hannah West
FROM THE SPORTS OFFICE B
ond v Griffith Rival Night took place last Thursday Night here at Bond. In total, 11 teams participated across six different sports: Basketball, Netball, Soccer, Touch Football, Volleyball and Water Polo. Rival Night provided a great warm up for NUG’s in Week 8, especially for those teams who were yet to play together. A special mention must go to the Men’s Basketball team who defeated Griffith 34-32 , the Men’s Soccer team who drew 2-2 and then went on to win the penalty shoot-out 3-0, and the Mixed Touch team who won 6 tries to 3. We hope to see a repeat of these results at NUG’s. Narrow losses were had by the Women’s netball team 31-26, the Mixed Volleyball team 2 sets to 1, and the Men’s Water Polo 12-10. Whilst we didn’t win overall, each team put in a great effort. With a month of training to go before NUG’s, our teams can only get stronger. At the end of the night Griffith took home the trophy winning 14 points to 10. A big thank-you to all teams that participated on the night, and to those who came along to support. It was a great evening of sport and we look forward to some more great results at NUG’s in July.
SCOPE | ISSUE 24 SPORT
few years between competitions, the Bullsharks finally got a hit out against long-term rivals Griffith last Thursday night. In the lead up to Northern University Games, our chance for a hit out was an important step in the preparations of many of our teams. Three locations across Bond kept BUSA’s Sport Pod busy, with competitions running simultaneously in the Sports Hall, out on the Fields and in the Pool. Games commenced at 4.00pm on the Fields, and despite the pouring rain, our Touch Football competitors put up a strong fight against Griffith in Women’s, Mixed and Men’s games. Volleyball not long after was underway in the Sports Hall, with Bond taking out the first set convincingly, but being narrowly beaten in the third set in a very high level match. Netball and Basketball soon followed under cover in the Hall, with a win to our Men’s Basketball team, and an unfortunate loss to the girls. Netball teams put up a strong battle in both Mixed and Women’s games. Mixed went down by nine points, while the girls who were up by one going into the final quarter ended up going down by 6 six.
Soccer, arguably the sport with the biggest Bullshark/Griffith rivalry of them all, was battled in torrential downpour out on the fields; the game ending in a penalty shoot out, which Bond took out in style. In the Pool both girls and boys battled for waterpolo glory, unfortunately going down to competitive Griffith teams. Throughout the night Red Bull provided drinks for spectators and competitors, and a BBQ was run poolside by BUSA. Big thanks to Jen Younger and Jackie Heffernan for their continued support and assistance in both the lead up and on game day. Look out for Rival Night 2.0 in the lead up to Australian University Games!
THE CLASH OF THE RIVALS: BOND BULLSHARKS VS. BOND PIRATES WORDS | Maximillian Wolthers This Saturday will see the resumption of the local derby, as Bond University Bullsharks take on the Bond Pirates. This derby is in its second year after Bond Uni stepped up as the glorified winner in it’s inaugural year. This inaugural year saw Bond Uni Bullsharks dominating the three games they played against the Pirates, including a 47-0 demolition at Bond Pirates’ home ground, and a 37-5 victory even after Pirates dropped a number of first grade players down. Nothing can beat the feeling of taking on your enemy on game day and bringing out the best in the Bullsharks. That’s one of the reasons you need to come down and cheer for your team as they continue their strong start to the season. Some key players return this week including captain Matthew Wertheimer, Ben Parn-
ham and Greg Russell, who will only strengthen the team further. So make sure you can say you were there when Bond University humiliated their arch rivals once again. Come around to the Bond Rugby fields at 1:50pm this Saturday!
BOND BULLSHARKS DEFEATED BALLINA BOMBERS 62 - 44 WORDS | Jeremy Fitzpatrick Last Friday saw the Bond AFL Bullsharks take on cross-state rivals Ballina Bombers, in Round 7 of the 2012 premiership season. Due to scheduling conflicts, the previously planned Saturday away game was moved to Friday night under the lights at the Scottsdale Drive Shark Tank; an opportunity that the roaring Bullsharks relished in. The game was nearly on the brink of cancellation due to severe weather, with the last minute decision to hold the clash as planned welcomed by the keen Bullsharks outfit. Friday’s game saw the return of
Bullsharks veteran Ryan Lenegan, which added great size to the Uni’s midfield. Other notable returns were the likes of AJ Cleary and Archie Marr, adding experience to the defensive and forward lines respectively. What was set to be a game fought tooth and nail started well for the Bullsharks, with gun midfielders Jesse Green and Geordie Edwards getting tough clearances to set up early goals for Uni; carrying the momentum into the first break with a 10 point lead. Early in the second quarter, the Bullsharks unfortunately lost key forward Harrison Jones to a mild concussion, yet still saw Uni increase the intensity of their long kicking game, and stretch the lead to 14 points at the turn of the half. Uni scored the opening two goals of the third quarter unanswered. Ballina rallied after this with two late goals managing to reduce the deficit back to 14 points. The Sharkies were
unshaken by this comeback, and managed to hold off the Bombers to continue their momentum through much of the fourth quarter coming home to win by 18. Final Score Bond Uni: 8-14-62
Ballina Bombers: 6-8-44
Best on Ground Mark Metzeling, AJ Cleary, Max Connelly, Sam Murphy, Dave Tyquin, Brock Phyland. Goal Kickers Sam Murphy (2), Jesse Green (2), Archie Marr (1), Brock Phyland (1), Dave Tyquin (1), Mark Metzeling (1). Crowd 60, haha.
WORDS | Your LSA IMAGE | Alex Myers, 23, currently in his last semester of Law.
WIN A DATE
TO LAW BALL 2012 WITH AN LSA EXECUTIVE Hair and make-up booked for Saturday June 23? Probably. But wait, are you getting ahead of yourself ladies? What about a date? The current LSA is offering its last competition of the one-year term. The competition is to win a date with one of the LSA Committee for Law Ball 2012.
What do you get? A shot at dating a soon to be LLB Grad (with honours), a seat at the table with the current LSA, a shot at love, plus a magical wine-filled evening with a perfect gentlemen. This competition could make your favourite romantic comedy a reality.
Who is the mystery man you ask? Ladies prepare to swoon. Alex Myers, who is practically Bond royalty. He is the LSA Treasurer and an awardwinning Mooter with a captivating personality.
HOW TO ENTER Send a Facebook message to the LSA with the reason why you should be set up with our Alex Myers at Bond’s biggest social event of the year. Only the lucky girl will be contacted with further details. The Competition ends Wednesday June 13th (Week 5).
SCOPE | ISSUE 24 SPORT
GOOD ADVICE IS HARD TO COME BY... SO HERE’S SOME FRIENDLY TIPS FROM SCOPE
• If you happen to be wearing thongs when it pours rain at Bond - remove them before venturing onto the orange tiles. • Taking a blanket, toothbrush/toothpaste and face wipes to the Batlabs from Week 4 onwards is perfectly acceptable.
MASTER DEBATER TOPIC WEEK 5: HARRY POTTER IS GREAT LITERATURE 250 words maximum. DUE: 4pm Monday, 11 June.
Carpark calamities. Picture this: It’s Tuesday morning just after 11am. You’ve got a meeting/class/study group to get to. But instead of slotting your car nicely into an empty carpark, you’re left driving the back-end of Bond for 20 minutes, only to find an empty space no where near close to your target destination. Between the expletives, acrimony and shouting, you curse yourself for: a) Not coming to uni earlier; b) Not taking up that lift offer from a friend/parent; c) Not taking the bus; or d) All of the above. As motor vehicle owners, we know and understand the rage that
follows the failure to locate a carpark; but I’m going to change one detail instead of driving to uni daily, you live on campus and you’ve just popped off to Robina for half an hour. Any on campus student can tell you the murderous rage that engulfs the mind when you turn into your restricted parking area, and some inconsiderate off campus fucker has just slotted their vehicle into a carpark that doesn’t even cater for all students living in that accommodation building. The next time I pull into A Block and an off campus car is parked in one of our few-and-far-between spots - I’m going to key it.
THE RAGE TRAIN
reetings Scope-siders, Gossip-Goat here; your one of many unreliable sources into the realistically dull lives of Bond’s self-proclaimed elite. Rumour has it the claws are coming out on Thursday night, and no man, or should I say boy, is safe from the clutches of some of Bond’s notorious cougars (cough, Melanie, cough), who are ready to pounce and bite into the fresh meat. Although a certain photographer will be shooting said cougars for the evening, he won’t be aiming to mount them... on his wall, as we hear his sights are set on the young gazelles guaranteed to be frolicking through Don’s in
HOT SPC scarves Law Ball Shades of Grey Signing a letter regarding Syria to the Foreign Minster of Russia CEOs and Office Hoes Grad 122 Roasted mushrooms Graduation robes Tim Jay’s flight simulator Cougars and Cradle-robbers NOT The weather Walking into the Library and feeling like you’re in Antarctica 60% assignments due in Week 4 The morning after Grad 122 Ex-Bondies not donating to the Annual Fund Aircon
HOT or NOT next to nothing - easy targets. If your (heart) is stolen by a finely aged gentlemen, or your (clothes) are torn to shreds by a ferociously passionate cougar - don’t forget to stock up on energy drinks for Friday (morning), because there ain’t no rest for the wicked (if you know what I mean)... In related news, we hear some of Bond’s finest, and wealthiest, will be mingling in the ISDA Foyer on Friday evening; so ladies if you’re looking for a (husband), don your best frock and flirt your way to success. If Shades of Grey is anything like the book - you’re in for a good time.
XOXO GOSSIP GOAT SCOPE | ISSUE 24 BONDY BANTER
BOND CLASSIFIEDS Looking to buy or sell something? Want to advertise a room for rent? Need a hot date for the weekend? Then this section is for you! Bond Classifieds is a free service for all Bondies, where you can advertise anything from textbooks to rooms for rent.
Just send in your ad (maximum 50 words), together with your SID number and contact details to scope.bond@gmail. com DEADLINE: 4pm Monday of the week you wish for your ad to appear.
nce more we are confronted with the age-old question of Mac v PC. While this may be seen as a bit of David vs Goliath battle, with Apple being the worlds largest corporation, and the choice of hipsters, Blackboard employees and Bond Uni students. PCs are generally crap, redundant and owned by plebeians. Although we may be continuously bombarded with messages from a certain editor of a certain student publication about the failings of the BUSA Mac, deep down we all know these are the words of a heathen who the mighty Mac Gods have seen fit to strike down for her unholy devotion to the “faithful Toshi”. But really, a Mac is bigger and better than a PC in every way, especially for everyday uses such as Photoshop (for editing ugly friends out of photos), Garage Band for making hipster ringtones and Face Time so study abroad students can have obnoxious conversations in every spare corner of the Batlabs. At the end of the day, 90 per cent of Bond students use Macs and we are all pretentious enough to think we’re the shit. Argument over.
ntelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.
DID YOU KNOW...
MACS ARE SUPERIOR TO PCS
found myself yet again in another tutorial surrounded by the fruity menace, there are 12 of them in the room, and even the tutor has one. I look down to my fountain point pen and notebook and wonder if this in some way makes me inadequate. What must such a product provide to have such wide-reaching popularity throughout a campus, throughout the world? I find myself asking the same question as I wake, roll out of bed and turn on my aging Toshiba. Granted its propped up on one end to allow sufficient air to reach the cooling fan, it has the odd crack in the plastic where I dropped it from large heights or off speeding vehicles and the screen simply refuses to clean. It gets an average of 27 viruses a week, shuts down randomly three or four times in that week and will never run good graphic software. However as I get into the shower and listen to Bach on a crackly record player I can’t help but compare it to so many of my other positions, my favourite shirt (more hole then shirt), my favourite tea set (every item chipped) and my favourite book (held together by will and tape). It occurs to me why so many people love their Mac’s, it is the perceived perfection. Their lack of flaws; they look sleek, cool and hip. They are given the newest space-aged design. They don’t get viruses, and if they do the computer is replaced. As soon as a model is out-dated it is replaced. They never develop a character, they have no personality. Perhaps this opinion is less meaningful as it comes from a man who thinks tweed is still a good option, that would rather drink tea than go clubbing, and who just occasionally goes for a walk with his cane; but I think that it is ridiculous to choose a possession based upon traits that we would despise in a human... Perfection. Our best friend is never the bloke who arrives perfectly on time, who never breaks the rules or goes M.I.A, it’s the bloke who does all those things and more and has the story to tell at the end. Me and my Toshiba have some stories. To paraphrase Larry McMurty, “We choose our companions for their flaws.” Why should we choose our most used possession any differently
AGAINST DAVID BROWN
aturity is: The ability to stick with a job until it’s finished; The ability to do a job without being supervised; The ability to carry money without spending it; and The ability to bear an injustice without wanting to get even.
Abigail Van Buren
SCOPE | ISSUE 24 BONDY BANTER
HAROLD’S POGO-COPTER (1967)
Like jumping up and down on a pogo stick? Love helicopters? How about a pogo stick with a propeller attached? Who wouldn’t want to jump up and down while a propeller whizzes around just over your head?! If this sounds like the perfect combination of danger, excitement and stupidity - the Pogo-Copter is for you! Essentially it’s a pogo stick with a propeller, throttle and helicopter engine attached - necessary of course to allow you to bounce high in the air and “float like you’re on a cloud” before the inevitable pull of gravity brings you back down to earth. Let’s hope you’re still in one piece...
YOUTUBE CLIP NAPTIME! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AF_nfazQaek * WARNING: This is not a real product/commercial There’s nothing wrong with a little dark humour, but if it’s not your thing you’re definitely not going to enjoy 0.18 or 2.01 of this clip. If it is - you’ll enjoy the entire clip. Anyone with a younger brother/sister/cousin/niece/nephew/ neighbour will know the ear-piercing tantrum scream well, and let’s be honest
- it’s a shame this product wasn’t (isn’t) available when you were babysitting that little shit the same week as exams. WHY YOU SHOULD WATCH IT It’ll make you giggle and brighten your day a little. WHERE CAN YOU BUY IT You can’t. Well not that EXACT product...
g me in h c u o t , u o y g in Touch g you, god you’re Touching me touchin
THE DARKNESS - I BELIEVE IN A THING CALLED LOVE YEAR: 2003 If this song is relatively unknown to you, well then - you’re in for a real treat. Capturing the essence of love in a melody and pitch that cat’s will love, ‘I Believe In A Thing Called Love’ is like Rihanna’s ‘Only Girl (In The World)’ you legitimately CAN’T sing it, but you HAVE to because it’s so damn catchy. Get this one onto your iPod/
SCOPE | ISSUE 24 OF THE WEEK
iPhone/music device and belt it out in the car, because, well, we all believe in a thing called love. CHORUS: I believe in a thing called love Just listen to the rhythm of my heart There’s a chance we could make it now We’ll be rocking ‘til the sun goes down I believe in a thing called love Ooh
verb To pretend illness, especially in order to shirk one’s duty, avoid work, etc. Origin Malingering has been recorded historically as early as Roman times by the physician Galen, who reported two cases.
In a sentence “Is he really ill or just malingering?”
“His boss suspected him of malingering because of his frequent absences from work.”
fter Andrew had been sick for a week, he asked his best friend Jesse to get his books out of his locker. Instead of telling Jesse the three number combination Andrew said he kept a small piece of paper with the combination under his locker door. After school Jesse went to Andrew’s locker and pulled the paper. On the paper was written: 24 24 22 9 9 9 9 22 24 22 9 9. Thinking this would be easy but a little tedious, Jesse entered in every arrangement of 24, 22, and 9 there was without the lock opening. Realizing there was something behind these numbers that he wasn’t noticing, Jesse sat down for a few minutes to think it out. After ten minutes of intense thinking, Jesse went to the locker, entered the combination into the lock and it opened. What was the combination? Answer in Issue 25 of Scope
_____________________________ BROKEN DOWN GOLF CART 15ml Amaretto Almond Liqueur 15ml Midori Melon Liqueur 1 dash lime juice Shake and strain through ice.
_____________________________ SHIT ON THE GRASS 15ml Green Creme de Menthe 15ml Baileys Irish Cream
In a shot glass, add Creme de Menthe then Baileys.
SEX WITH AN ALLIGATOR Sweet and Sour mix Midori Melon Liqueur 15ml Raspberry Liqueur 15ml Jagermeister Herbal Liqueur
Add Sweet and Sour mix and Midori to a shaker with ice. Shake and strain. Layer in Raspberry Liqueur and Jager. The Raspberry Liquer should go to the bottom, and the Jager should float to the top.
_____________________________ RED HEADED SLUT 30ml Peach Schnapps 30ml Jagermeister Herbal Liqueur Cranberry juice
Answer to the puzzle in Issue 23: 1: MARGE LETS NORAH SEE SHARON’S TELEGRAM. 2: WE’LL LET DAD TELL LEW. 3: NO MISSES ORDERED ROSES, SIMON. All three sentences, when correctly placed, are palindromes. They read the same backward and forward.
Chill and serve. _____________________________
OF THE WEEK SCOPE | ISSUE 24 OF THE WEEK
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