A Beautiful Disaster
A Beaut B utifull Disaaster… … Imagine bein ng 2 years old and no ot havin ng a mom mmy and d daddyy to tucck you i nto bed d at nightt. Imagine you urself ne ever ge etting to o enjoyy a familly dinne er. Imagine livin ng each h day in fear. Imagine nevver gettting the e chancce to haave your first birthday parrty. Imagine livin ng each h day alone. Imagine wallking in their s shoes fo or a dayy… Each d day 5,760 more ch hildren be ecome orrphans. Every 22.2 secon nds anoth her orphaan ages o out‐ left h hopeless. Every 1 15 second ds, a child d in Africa becom mes an AID DS orphaan. In Russia and U Ukraine, 1 0‐ 15 % off the child dren thatt age outt committ e before the age o of eighteen. suicide 60% off these girls becom me prostitutes, w while 70% of the bo oys becom me crimin nals.
This is the eir reality.
Book Review: Keys to
Parenting an Adopted Child By: Kathy Lancaster *Received the Parents’ Choice Silver Honor Award
Keys to Parenting an Adopted Child discusses important issues that adoptive parents may be experiencing, as well as many helpful tips to prepare future adoptive parents for the journey ahead.
Useful Sections include: The most important predictors of a well-adjusted adopted child Studies about the impact of heredity versus environment on personality The importance of your child's privacy and who needs to know what details on your child's adoptive status Appropriate adoption language and terminology What to expect at each developmental stage your child goes through How to answer questions from the public regarding the adoption
Larupa Green 1)
How old were you when you were adopted? 4 years old.
Where were you adopted from? Thailand
Do you know your birth parents? No.
Do you have any brothers and sisters in your adopted family? Or any that you know of in your biological family? No, I see my adopted parents as my only parents. They were the ones who were really there for me, and raised me. My real parents only gave birth to me.
Have your adopted parents been open with discussing your background with you? Yes, they have been very open. They even took me back to the orphanage I originally came from to visit.
Do you think it is easier to adopt from the U.S or overseas? Why or why not? Of course it is easier, because you don’t need nearly as many legal documents, and the process is much faster since you don’t have to deal with foreign governments, and their laws. “I am very grateful for the life I have now. I do sometimes wonder where I would be or know, or be doing had not my current parents adopted me, or if my real parents had not put me in the orphanage.”- Larupa Green
Interview with Mr. McDermott 1) How old were you when you were adopted? 4-5 months 2) Where were you adopted from? I was born in Washington D.C. and that was adopted from the Parker Home at fourfive months. 3) Do you know your birth parents? No. 4) Do you have any brothers and sisters in your adopted family? Or any that you know of in your biological family? I have an older sister, Megan who was adopted two years prior to my arrival. 5) If you do not know your parents, have you ever wanted to find them? Only when I was mad at my parents for “grounding me.” 6) Have your adopted parents been open with discussing your background with you? Yes, when I asked any question(s) 7) Have you ever felt different? Yes, my situation is unique- My „adopted parents‟ are white, while my sister and I are mixed. 8) Do you think it is easier or better to adopt from the U.S or overseas? Why or why not? I am a firm believer of domestic adoption due to the fact that I am a product of adoption.
“My parents are the ones who adopted me in 1978, they are the ones who have provided me with more opportunities in life than I could ever imagine. Therefore, the title of „adopted parents‟ has never been used as term for describing them. I have always attempted to represent them in the best way possible through my day-to-day activities. I have found my personal plight to be vastly different than my older sister‟s. It goes to show you there remains the debate of Nature vs. Nurture.” – Brian McDermott
Interview with psychiatrist Dr. Lowndes 1) In what ways do you think adoption affects children? What sort of emotional issues do you think adopted children tend to deal with? Positive Affects- Children get a well-balanced life they would be deprived of. Negative- There may be a quest to know biological parents or lack of selfknowledge. Kids who are adopted at a higher age are more aware of their lack of self-knowledge.
2) How can parents help their child cope with these sorts of issues? Adopted parents need to always make sure that they remind the child of how lucky they are. They need to know that they are special.
3) After working with my sister, Ava, what sort of changes have you seen in her ever since your first visit with her? Positive- Avaâ€™s emotional issues are unique to her. Her problems certainly needed to be addressed. Also, her family members needed to learn how to cope with her during this time. After Ava received help, there was increased awareness of how family members needed to cope with her. Negative- Behavioral problems could have come from her heritage (ADD). She expressed most of her problems at home and at school. Negative comments from authorities lead to negative self-esteem.
4) Do you think it is important for the child to continue to have a connection to the country they are adopted from? -Yes, but visits to the country should not be allowed until later on when they child understand their situation. Visits should also depend on the country and the countryâ€™s conditions and way of living. This is important because of what that would say about self-worth to the child.
5) At what age do you think it is important for the child to learn that he or she is adopted? - It all depends on the child. I would advise an early age so that the child can be aware as soon as possible and it will always be a part of their self-knowledge.
Naaturre vs.. Nu urtu ure How does Naturee vs. Nurturre relate to aadoption? Nature vs. Nurture iss a well‐know wn phrase to o describe h ow the roless of hereditaary and environm ment in human developm ment affect u us. The natuure theory off human beh havior has leead scientist to believe th hat people b behave as they do accor ding to our ““animal insttincts”, otherwise known ass the abilitie es that we were born witth. The nurt ure theory o of human beehavior means that people think and d behave in certain wayys because thhey are taugght to do so. Whicch human trraits relate tto the nature theory? The m most well‐kn nown traits tthat relate to o the naturee theory are those such aas eye color and hair ccolor. These traits are de etermined b by certain ge nes. This theeory also has lead scienttists to be elieve that trraits such as intelligence, personalityy, aggression n, and sexuaal orientation n are also e encoded in aan individual’s DNA. How does the nu urture theorry shape who we are? e who suppo ort the nurtu ure theory b believe that ggenetic tend dencies may possibly exiist, Those but th hey that do not determiine our behaaviors. The nnurture theo ory supports that our behaviors mostlyy originate frrom the environmental ffactors of ou ur upbringing. A gen ne may incre ease the like elihood of one’s behavio ors; howeveer it does no ot make a peerson behave a certain n way. Overaall, the link b between natture vs. nurrture shows us that we m may never exactly know an adop pted child’s ggenetic backkground, but the way th hey are nurttured defin nitely plays a a role in their behaviorss.