32 |
Local
the
11 – 25 MARCH | 2016
PLANB by Briana Westmacott
Here’s George, headed up the steps from the nude beach. George really doesn’t care if you’re naked or not, he’ll mess up your towel either way.
When Briana isn’t lecturing for her writing courses at UCSB and SBCC, she contributes to The Santa Barbara Skinny, Wake & Wander and Flutter Magazine. Along with her passion for writing and all things Santa Barbara, much of her time is spent multitasking through her days as a mother, wife, sister, want-to-be chef and travel junky. Writing is an outlet that ensures mental stability... usually.
YOU CAN LEAVE YOUR HAT ON AND YOUR SWIMSUIT TOO!
T
here’s a place in town where people get naked, out in the open. On the beach, as a matter of fact, and I’m not real happy about it. The patch of pristine sand that provokes people to strip off their clothes is located at the bottom of More Mesa Preserve bluffs. Eucalyptus trees reach high up out of the cliffs while Egrets and Blue Herons flap overhead. It is something to see, or for some, a place not to be seen. Believe me when I say, I’m all about nakedness. Hippy parents raised me out on land in the middle of nowhere. I ran around disrobed a ton, probably way beyond the years that most kids frolic without clothing. Nobody cared out in the Mendocino forests and luckily I was immune to poison oak. But the thing is, nobody was around to see. Recently, I’ve been running on the
This is the nude beach from above. Stunning isn’t it? And empty since I took this photo at sunrise.
trails out there at More Mesa and I am surprised by how many nudists frequent that area. Honestly, I had no idea there were so many bodies in the buff dotting the public sand on a daily basis. At first I thought, no big deal, but the more time I spent running in that area, the more I was shocked and shaken. The thing is, there aren’t just nudists down on the beach. I have seen people up on the tops of the bluffs, with binoculars, doing creepy things while secretly taking in the naked vista below. So while nudity can and should be celebrated, I think these spots draw out other disturbing problems. I am sure the nudists would not be happy to hear of their hidden binocular packing fans. DON’T GET YOUR PANTIES IN A BUNCH, BUT PUT SOME ON PLEASE
I’ve since become privy to an unwritten rule that when you get to the base of the More Mesa steps, the denuded go right and bathing suits are worn to the left. I ran to the right one time before I became aware of this; the raw Frisbee throwing young men and bare-breasted (bare-bottomed too for that matter) ukulele strumming trio of gals made me pick up my pace and look up to avoid eye contact. The problem with looking up was that my eyes ran smack dab into another fellow who was doing naked handstands. With nowhere to avert my vision, I turned around and ran away as fast as I could. For the most part the unclad playground was harmless, and obviously fun for those who were avoiding tan lines. But for me, it was a little too much. I don’t think our beaches should be open for this. No doubt this statement may spark some controversy. I am sure some will try to compare it to the European shores where women commonly lounge on the sand topless. I’ve been there and done that in the South of France; however, it is one thing to take off your top, and
another to expose every ounce of skin. I suppose I could simply avoid the More Mesa area altogether, but is that fair? That stretch of beach is truly one of the prettiest Santa Barbara has to offer. If I bring my kids down there, I don’t want to have to worry about how I am going to explain the mass populous of older men missing their trunks. My plea is simple: cover up, people, and I mean with more than just a hat. Lord knows the size of swimsuits these days is quite small, so I’m not asking for much here. Or if you must uncover, do so in the privacy of your own backyard. Our beaches are public and should not be subject to so much skin.
BRIANA’S BEST BET • Do you want to know more about the More Mesa Preserve property? Go to www.moremesa.org/wordpress to learn about the wildlife and nature that exist in this undeveloped area. You can also join the coalition to keep the land and nature protected. • As the weather begins to warm and we all start heading down to the beach, I suggest taking Michelle’s Dailey Method barre fitness class to get your body beach ready. Located at 2905 De La Vina Street, Michelle’s studio will work every part of your body. I mean, every part. She makes you realize there are parts you didn’t even know existed on your body. They will hurt, but they will be toned and ready for exposure. To get started, go to: www. thedaileymethod.com/studios/santabarbara/overview • If you are searching for a new swimsuit this season, local brand So De Mel has a variety of beautiful options for beach and pool wear. Founded by Brazilian Sonia De Mello, So De Mel has swimsuits for all types of body sizes and shapes. Go to her website to see more: www.sodemel.com