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Woman San Diego

Informing, Entertaining, and Featuring the Women of San Diego

www.sandiegowoman.com

Beauty, Fashion & Fitness

Issue 2012

Summer Hair Obsession Fashion Week San Diego™ Fashion For All Fitness Shake-up


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2012_Women_San Diego Woman_Layout 1 2/22/12 4:43 PM Page 1

Michelle Houle

Director Emeritus/Founding Member San Diego Hospice and The Institute for Palliative Medicine

Early Childhood Teacher Lindsay Community School

Leaders. Role models. But most of all, heroes. Union Bank and KPBS are honored to recognize the recipients of the 2012 Local Heroes Awards for Women’s History Month. Your unwavering dedication and selfless contributions to your community are a continuous source of inspiration to us all. In celebration of Women’s History Month, we salute our local heroes for their passion and positive influence on our future generations.

From all of us at Union Bank and KPBS, congratulations to our 2012 Local Heroes of the Year.

©2012 Union Bank, N.A.

unionbank.com/heroes

San Diego

Dr. Doris Howell

Woman

Local Heroes

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Woman San Diego

Dear Readers,

Welcome to our BFF (Beauty, Fashion & Fitness) issue. We have had a blast putting this issue together. What we found the most fun was seeing how these issues impact women of all ages. Take some time and gaze through the beautiful fashion pages, where local designers and boutiques shared their products with us. You are certain to find some fabulous ideas for your upcoming wardrobe and fashion choices . Read Summer Hair Obsession-What’s Hot in 2012 ?, in our beauty section and tips on how to Beautify Your Surroundings, from two local experts in their respective fields. In our Fashion section you will find beautiful photographs from local clothing and accessory designers Stacie May and Erin Fader. We are also so happy to inform you of Fashion Week San Diego™ which is returning to our town after a special revamping to make it bigger and better than ever before. Why travel to Los Angeles, New York or Paris when you can enjoy the great talent our city has to offer. Our fashion layout Fashion for All, shows that no matter what age, there is a trend that is just right for you. In our fitness sections we tackle the age old problem of boredom with the same old exercise routine? Maybe Boxing or Ballet, or even Pole Dancing might make you more likely to get your body moving again. Take a look at our Fitness Shake-up article and find some fun new ways to get fit for those summer bathing suits. Perhaps you are struggling with your business and can’t figure out why? Read our article, Three Common Pitfalls for Entrepreneurs and find out if you could be getting in the way of your own success. Our article Putting your Business on the Internet will provide valuable information in an easy to understand format for those business owners ready to take on the challenge. back, relax, and spend some time enjoying the beauty and talent of San Diego found in our pages. We 4 Sit were so thrilled with all of the feedback we received on our Mega Bridal Issue 2012. We love to hear from

our readers, not only with comments on our issue, but with ideas for features you would like to see in upcoming issues. We love our readers and hope to hear from you soon.

Sincerely,

Judith A. Habert

Publisher/Editor-in-Chief

Subscription Information

Annual subscriptions available on request Please send name, mailing address, and check for $25.00 payable to San Diego Woman.

San Diego Woman 254 E Grand Avenue, Suite 201 Escondido, CA 92025 888 275 7125 858 735 5301 Disclaimer: Products, services, practices, websites or informational packets mentioned within our pages are in no way an endorsement by San Diego Woman, but are provided to our readers for informational purposes only. Privacy Advisory: Personal information provided by our readers will be used solely for the purposes of providing requested information and will not be shared.

Photographer: Melissa Au www.dandeliondreamsphotography.com Model:Traelee Costello

Graphics/Magazine Layout: Sonali Soni www.sonalidesignstudio.com


Inside

Page 11

Beautify Your Surroundings How to Make your House your Own.

Page 12

Stacie May Designs Local Designer Shows Her Style.

Page 13

Fashion Week San Diego™ Look Out New York & Paris.

Page 16

Union Bank Celebrates Honoring our Heroes.

Page 17

A Day at the San Diego Hat Company Del Mar’s Day at the Races.

Page 21

Date Night Get Ready for Some Fun!

Page 22

Fashion For All No Matter the Age, Fashion is for Everyone.

Page 24

Trashy Chic Jewelry Designer Erin Fader.

Page 26

Fitness Pictorial Boxing is not Just for Men.

Page 30

Muscles Remember What the Mind Forgets Get up and move.

Page 32

Fitness Shake-up Try Some New Fitness Crazes.

Page 33

When Did Things Change The Good Old Days.

Page 34

Three Common Pitfalls of Entrepreneurs And How to Avoid them.

Page 39

Are You a Giraffe? How to Survive a Narcissist.

Page 44

Forgiveness Heal the Pain Within.

Page 46

Hospice Volunteering The Joy of Giving.

Page 48

Cafasso Meatball Company An Italian Taste Sensation.

Page 49

In every Issue Letter from the Editor

Page 4

Letters to the Editor

Page 8

Transitions with Carol LeBeau Massage and Its Healing Power.

Page 18

He Said/She Said Is Your Guy a Fashionista?

Page 29

Fabulous Finds Our Editors Pick their Favorites.

Page 35

Women of Distinction Dr Christy Chen.

Page 36

Business Intelligence Putting your Business on the Internet.

Page 40

Ask An Angel How New Technology Can Help.

Page 41

Book Review Honey Chaser The Trustafarian

Page 42

Book Review Meet Me Under the Eiffel Tower.

Page 43

Feeding People With a Club A Local Event Helps Charities.

Page 50

San Diego

Summer Hair Obsession What’s Hot in 2012?

Woman

Issue 2012

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Publisher/Editor-in-Chief editor@sandiegowoman.com

6 Sonali Soni

Creative Director

creativedirector@sandiegowoman.com

Woman San Diego

San Diego

Judith A. Habert

Woman

Behind the Pages

Judith A. Habert Publisher/Editor-in-Chief

Sonali Soni Creative Director

Robert Tussey Copy Editing

Lisa K. Miller Photographer

Jaime V. Habert

Special Fashion Edition Editor

Now find us on:

www.sandiegowoman.com 254 E Grand Avenue, Suite 201 Escondido, CA 92025 888 275 7125 858 735 5301

Facebook.com/SanDiegoWoman

myspace.com/sandiegowomanmagazine

twitter.com/SanDiegoWoman

Graphics/Magazine Layout: Sonali Soni www.sonalidesignstudio.com

twitter.com/sdwomanconcerts


W R I T E R S

Rob is president of The MarketBuilding Team, has written two books on marketing, and authors a free marketing advice column called Ask Mr. Marketing. You can subscribe to his free marketing newsletter at www. marketbuilding.com.

Justin Hanover

Carol LeBeau

Carol LeBeau spent close to 30 years as a beloved fixture on San Diego News. Today she is enjoying her retirement, as well as a second career as an in demand speaker at functions throughout San Diego. In addition to her many speaking engagements, Carol is a columnist for San Diego Woman speaking about life after her news career.

Kathryn Rudlin, LCSW Kathy has been a Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW) in California since 1988, and 10 years ago began exploring her passion to write magazine and online articles on mental health topics. After surviving her own struggle to understand the impact of being raised by a narcissistic mother she is eager to help other women who are feeling discouraged, alone or unsure where to find support Contact Kathy at: knownarcs@att.net and view her website: www.knownarcs. com

Bill Edmett Bill is the CEO of Intelibiz Business Solutions, Inc. with over thirty years of experience in database programming and custom business software. Intelibiz specializes in database websites utilizing SQL Server, MS Access and ASP.Net. You can visit his company’s website at www. intelibiz.com.

Kathy Mays Kathy is an Allied Member of ASID, a Certified Interior Designer and member of NKBA, The National Kitchen and Bath Association. Kathy is also a Public Speaker. She brings a fresh perspective to Interior Design with her signature speech "Make Your Home Your Own" which bridges the gap between your home style and fashion style. For more information call 858-717-0535 or visit: www.KathyMaysDesign.com

Josee D’Amore

Justin is a master stylist at Bb Hair Art in the Rancho Penasquitos area of San Diego. He has been doing hair for 13 years. He has been residing in San Diego for 15 years with his wife and two children. Bb Hair Art is located at 12778 Rancho Penasquitos Blvd. suite D, San Diego Ca 92129. Contact Justin at (619) 339-3385

Josěe is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in California. She earned her Masters Degree in Marriage and Family Therapy from Bethel Seminary San Diego. She has her private practice called Gems of Hope Counseling in La Mesa, California. She specializes in trauma, abuse, relationship issues, depression, anxiety, grief and loss, parenting, and care-giver support. Her website is http://www. Ann Heizer gemsofhopecounseling.com and email is gemsofhope@ Ann has worked as a certified hotmail.com group exercise instructor and personal trainer for more than 30 years. Ann is the founder of Grounded XT™ Cross Training for the Nooks and Crannies. Her specialty is fitness and healthy lifestyles for older adults. For more information: http://annheizer.com

Jaime V. Habert

Jaime is a music enthusiast whose favorite genres include jazz vocals, and classical crossover. She has plans to pursue a degree in Business Management. She is a freelance writer, who takes every opportunity to write about the subject she loves. Jaime resides with her family in Rancho Bernardo, California.

Erin Ruocco

Erin a Boston native, Lesley University graduate, and 2011 Del Mar hat day contestant, She now lives in Poway with her husband, pet therapy dog, and cantankerous cat. Her work has appeared in LIVING FIT, San Diego Woman, and San Diego Family Magazines.

Lisa K Miller

Lisa is the owner of Photography by Lisa K, a custom portrait studio located in San Diego, specializing in the highest quality portraiture. As the mother of twins, Lisa shines at capturing moments in pregnancy and early life. She shares her talents with many local charities Photography by Lisa K

Stephanie Sundell

Her love of photography began in 1975 when she received her first camera from her dad. She has been taking photos ever since. Stephanie has been creating beautiful wedding memories for couples for the past 18 years. For more information visit Stephanie's site at www.creativephotographyinc.com

Glenda Batzer

Glenda holds a B.S. in Molecular Biology and has worked in scientific research for more than 17 years. A transplant from Massachusetts in 2004, she currently works full time for a small biotechnology start-up in La Jolla. In her spare time, she is learning to play golf and enjoys writing human interest stories.

San Diego

Robert has been a published writer for over thirty years and has been providing editing services for the past twenty-five. As a musician he has written scores of songs. His life has revolved around his music and writing, often melding the two into articles and interviews.

Barbara is a freelance travel writer, reviewer, and photographer. For the better part of her adult life she’s traveled the world; capturing the beauty, cuisines, and curiosities of unique places.

Woman

Robert Tussey

Rob Weinberg

Stephanie, a mid-westerner at heart, is the founder and co-owner of Chic CEO. With a background in brand building, media buying and entrepreneurship, Burns has wide experience with an eclectic portfolio of industries. While pursuing her MBA, Stephanie decided to launch a web resource any woman could use and understand without obtaining her business degree.

Barbara K. Cooper

P HOTOGRAPHERs

Stephanie Burns


Letters Editor to the

Thank you for your Bridal issue. It came at just the right time. I am planning my wedding and I had so many questions. Your articles were informative and very helpful. Linda from Point Loma I cannot believe how great it was to read articles from real people who were going through some of the same issues that I face. My husband passed away nine years ago and I started dating about a year ago. I have found a wonderful man who wants to get married, but I have so many questions and concerns. Reading Shelli Chosak’s column and article, actually made me feel so much better. Thanks for your great magazine. Barb from Oceanside

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San Diego Woman Magazine Congratulates one of our favorite advertisers, La Vita Compounding Pharmacy and their owners Debra Hubers and Christine Givant, on being awarded SBA Women-Owned Small Business of the Year for 2012 Congratulations….you deserve it!

I found the article on destination weddings helpful. I have been thinking of having a destination wedding next August, but had fear that it wouldn’t be everything I hoped for. The Ireland wedding sounds ideal. I am now beginning research to find out if it will work for my fiancé and I. Marianne from San Diego I really hadn’t even thought of the legal aspects of getting married. Ms. Bolander helped answer a bunch of my questions. Thanks for your help. Keri from San Diego How funny! The article about the Greek wedding, although maybe not so funny to the author, gave me a few chuckles and also made me realize that those romantic fantasies sometimes are not what they seem to be. Catherine from Escondido Carol LeBeau always hits so close to home with her column. My husband and I have just celebrated our 32nd wedding anniversary and I do agree, kindness is what first attracted me to my husband, and it is what has helped us during medical and financial difficulties. Be kind, like Carol suggested, it will keep a marriage strong. Sophia from Poway I was married several years ago at the Grand Tradition and I was able to have the dream wedding I had always imagined. I am happy to hear that they are going strong and helping to make other brides live out their dreams. Cathy from Temecula I never knew that the zoo did weddings. I was excited to find this out through your publication. I just got engaged and it is definitely one of the venues we are considering. Combining one of my favorite spots in San Diego with the most important day in my life sounds perfect. Irene from La Mesa My family originally came from Romania, and I have never seen any information about our wedding traditions. It was great learning about the different ways that different cultures celebrate weddings. Mara from Carlsbad

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SHOP YOUR LOCAL MARK REPRESENTATIVE: JAIME HABERT

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Beauty

Photo by Mike & Stephanie Gines www.blinkitphotography.com


Summer Hair Obsession- What’s Hot in 2012 ? By Justin Hanover

San Diego

Woman

Color this summer goes beyond basic and incorporates a bevy of new hues. Technology has made available a larger array of colors and tones than ever before. While it is most important to choose a gorgeous shade that compliments your skin tone, you are no longer limited in the color you choose. Styling this summer favors classic American looks. Polished pony tails are a great option for longer tresses. Deconstructed braids and knots are also a fun way to take your look from casual to sophisticated. A bouncy blow-out is always a great way to enhance your hair. Visiting a professional can help demystify the array of new products out there and teach you how to easily recreate looks at home. Many new styling products have come on the market lately and they can save you time and frustration. There are many products on the market to reduce blow dry time (one of my favorites is N4 blow dry lotion). Argon oil, such as L'Oreal Mythic Oil, can help you achieve the perfect slicked back pony tail. A sea spray, like KMS Sea Salt Spray, can make you look like you've just stepped off the beach (even if you haven't had time to get there all summer). The key to taking any trend to the streets is to do it in a way that works for you. Considering your hair type, lifestyle and amount of maintenance required is the key to incorporating any fun summer look into your life. A slight modification can lead to a total makeover, so step out of your comfort zone and have a little fun this summer.

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As summer approaches, one of the most common questions I am asked by my clients is ”what is new and trendy this summer?” For 2012, my answer is wearable, casual hair that is polished but not too structural. Summer is also a time of year that I encourage clients to try something new and a great time of year to experiment with change and try a new sunny shade or style. Texture can be a great way to update your look, without making a drastic change. Adding lots of texture to your hair can allow you to have a polished look at the office and a more deconstructed, casual look for the weekend. Ombre hair color is a hot trend this summer. With ombre hair the hair is darker at the root and lightens or changes color as you reach the ends of your hair. You can choose to go as subtle or as drastic as you want. Using heavy highlights near the lower portion of your locks, to a full change in hue from root to tip, you can choose how to make this look work with your lifestyle.

Justin Hanover is a master stylist at Bb Hair Art in the Rancho Penasquitos area of San Diego. He has been doing hair for 13 years. He has been residing in San Diego for 15 years with his wife and two children. Bb Hair Art is located at 12778 Rancho Penasquitos Blvd. suite D, San Diego Ca 92129. Contact Justin at (619) 339-3385.


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Beautify Your Surroundings By Kathy Mays, Interior Designer Cushions, Pillows, Rugs & Panels

Warm weather is here and living in San Diego means summertime visitors! Are you ready to spruce up your home? If so, then start to think about changing out accessories like cushions, pillows, rugs and panels. These are all great items that can refresh and renew your home in, inexpensive and delightful ways. • Think Bright Colors, Textures and Patterns When You Spruce Up For Summer. • Recover, Reupholster or Simply, Add New Cushions to Your Dining and Outdoor Chairs. • Roll up Dark Heavy Area Rugs from Fall & Rollout Fresh Light Crisp Colors of Summer. • Add Different Pillows Sizes & Shapes with Color to Give your Sofa Dimension & Style. • Consider Adding Lightweight Sheers or Panels over existing Shutters or Blinds.

Whether you’re remodeling or rearranging your furniture decide ahead of time what’s most important to you. Each situation may be different but I promise you the process is the same. 1. Prioritize what you want to change. Start with whatever is most important to you. Be honest with yourself & don’t take on too much at one time. Ex: Start with one room. 2. Set a deadline to Start & Stop your Project. This will get you moving and out of overwhelm and on your way. You can always extend the date, but be sure to schedule a start date. 3. Decide on a Direction, Theme, or Color way. Create a plan that flows with the rest of the room, space, home or office. This holds true for any project, including redesign. 4. Create a Realistic Budget. If you are remodeling do your homework. To start, get 3 estimates to compare what Contractor / Designer suits both your budget and style best. 5. Don’t Wait, Don’t Vacillate. Give yourself 3 options to choose from. Be sure to include 1 idea that you’re pretty certain you’ll toss out. This makes the elimination process that much easier. Now you only have to choose between 2 out of the 3 choices. 6. Take Action! This is by far my best advice. Many people are afraid of making the wrong decision. Follow your instinct, you may not make a prize winning decision, but you will decide on something you feel suits you and your style. At the end of the day that is what really matters and you’re one step closer in making your home your own!

How to Shop for Accessories for your Home

When shopping for new accessories for your home, it’s important to keep in mind color and proportion, balance, harmony & style. It’s even better if you take a picture with you. Make it easy on yourself and follow these 5 simple style solutions. Quick changes like these can make your home feel instantly lighter, 1. Create a color palette. Look at the colors in the room. Build your brighter and more current. So put away last season’s dark colors and palette around the most dominate colors unless of course the room is brighten up your home with the fresh new crisp, clean colors of monochromatic. Then you will want to add contrasting colors to give Summer! the room a pop of color. This will add life to the space. 2. Take something with colors of the Room with you to shop. If Good Interior Design is a Process you’re looking for accessories for your living or family room, take a In almost everything we do there is a process. The same holds true throw pillow from the sofa with you. This is a good item to carry along with good Interior Design. If you want to start a project of your own because it’s usually small and it will normally have the colors that and are not sure where to start, follow these 6 simple suggestions match the sofa already in it. If it doesn’t you may want to consider to help you break it down and break through from your concept to shopping for new throw pillows to tie the two together. completion. 3. Purchase accessories with intention. All too often I see lots of little “dust collector” items on a fireplace mantle. Visually, everything on the mantle now looks very small and cluttered. Take the proportion of the accessory size in account to the size you are placing the item on. Size does matter and lastly remember less is more when it comes to your mantle. Be sure to purchase what you purchase with intention. 4. Choose items that make a statement. Whether you choose a single item or a collection, choose an item that stands well on its own or items that work 760.587.7533 well together in a collection or group. This can be done seasonally and add variety to your home. 5. Trust your fashion style. As an Interior Designer and former Image Consultant, I’ve found that your fashion style diNatural Stone. Glass Tile. Porcelain. Mosaic. Granite rectly correlates to your home style. Ask yourself what is my fashion style? Are you casual, contemporary, classic, eclectic, romantic or a combination of a couple? Now, look around at your furniture and furnishings. Begin to notice many of the same colors, patterns and textures are Online Gallery www.ironstonetile.com there as well. That is because you find yourself most comfortable wearing and living in your own style. This is a simple yet effective way to be true to yourself, shop with confidence and in your own personal style! LIC# 957690


Stacie May

San Diego

Fashion

Woman

Slinky Metallic One Shoulder Knit Dress with Belt

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Designs

Model: Alex Womack Photographer: Melissa Au. www.dandeliondreamsphotography.com


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Flirty Striped Skirt

Model: Alex Womack Photographer: Melissa Au. www.dandeliondreamsphotography.com


San Diego

Woman

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Model: Alex Womack Photographer: Melissa Au. www.dandeliondreamsphotography.com

Knit Tube Dress with Satin Side Stripe

To Purchase These Designs Visit www.StacieMay.com


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ness package to help make their line a reality. Fashion Week San Diego’s goal is not only to introduce these designers to the community, but also help give them momentum to grow. Creator Andrews is also the President of APA Business Consulting, Inc., which she started in 2005. Her clients are primarily in the fashion arena, both retail and manufacturing. In 2007, seeing a need for a local San Diego celebration of the talented designers and unique clothing and beauty retail venues we have in town, Andrews came up with a unique idea. She wanted to produce a local version of the well known Fashion Week celebration. With her background and education, (Andrews holds a Bachelor of Science in Organizational Leadership and an Associate of Art in Merchandise Marketing), she knew this type of event was sorely lacking in San Diego. Part of her desire for fashion week comes from her belief in empowering both people and business to grow and thrive. Andrews add, “Our mission statement, perhaps says it best, ‘Fashion Week San Diego™ is a collaborative entertainment fashion event to celebrate the people of San Diego in fashion by showcasing and highlighting the pulse of these entrepreneurs and what they are creating.’” When asked about what inspired the creation of this event Andrews replied, “I decided to create Fashion Week San Diego™ after attending several fashion weeks in California and hosting fashion shows in San Diego. After throwing several fashion shows around town for my clients, I saw the need for a larger event. And I wanted to be the person to take it to the next level, and help draw attention to San Diego’s Fashion Community. The city of San Diego inspired me to create Fashion Week San Diego™ . I choose to live here, but love culture and good experiences. I was tired of having to go to other cities to get the events I wanted to be part of. In addition, I wasn't alone with this feeling. Anyone can have a good idea, but it takes people to make it happen and I was lucky that there were people who wanted this event as much as I did. I'm also lucky to have an amazing team of volunteers, sponsors, ticket holders and participants to make it happen… without them it would be just an idea.” When asked what her goals are for Fashion Week, Andrews replied, “The main goal is to, in the next three years, convert to more buyers in the audience than regular ticket holders. I would love for FWSD to be on the buyer’s calendar every year! Also Fashion Week San Diego™ is about giving designers a platform to launch and grow their careers.”

Fashion Week San Diego We may not have the reputation of New York, Los Angeles, or Paris, but look out, San Diego is a contender when it comes to the celebration of Fashion Week! This is thanks to Allison Andrews, the Founder and Director of Fashion Week San Diego™ Fashion Week San Diego™ was founded in 2008 by Allison Andrews with the idea of creating a fashion industry event to aid the developing fashion culture in San Diego. The first Fashion Week San Diego™ took place in October of 2008 at different venues around Downtown San Diego. The event went on hiatus for three years to recoup after the economic recession. Andrews exclaims,“Those three years gave us time to be missed, rest, and re-group! Now in 2012 the event is coming back even stronger!” Fashion Week San Diego™ is a collaborative entertainment fashion event to celebrate the people of San Diego in fashion by showcasing and highlighting the pulse of these entrepreneurs and what they are creating. Fashion Week San Diego™ 2012 will feature 16 designers all from San Diego with collections ranging from ready to wear, jewelry, sportswear, plus size and haute couture. All events including the runway show, shopping day, art & beauty exhibit and education panels will take place in downtown San Diego October 1st through the 7th. One designer, as voted by the audience of Fashion Week San Diego™, will win a busi-

Fashion Week San Diego™ is presented by APA Business Consulting, Inc. The event will be open to both industry professionals and the public. For sponsor, media and participant opportunities, as well as tickets, email info@fashionweeksd.com.


The 2011 Local Heroes honorees are: Veverly E. Anderson, Theophilus A. (Theo) Logan and Martha R. Logan (Black History Month); Kathi Anderson and Barbara Bry (Women’s History Month); Thomas E. Hom and Robin J. Tarr (Asian Pacific American Heritage Month); Edith Eva Eger, Ph.D. and Jackie Gmach

(Jewish American Heritage Month); Delores A. Jacobs, Ph.D. and Nicole Murray Ramirez (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender Pride Month); Richard Nares and Rachael Ortiz (Hispanic Heritage Month); Bill Bodry and Pamela Finkel (Disability Awareness Month); and Michelle Marie Parada and Brandie Taylor (Native American Heritage Month.) “We are grateful for the opportunity to express our commitment to diversity and our communities through the Local Heroes program and our partnership with KPBS,” said Union Bank Senior Executive Vice President Pierre P. Habis, head of Community Banking. “We’re proud to celebrate these amazing individuals with this well deserved recognition.” Entertainment for the evening included B-Side Players, LEIISA Polynesian Dance Group, the San Diego Ballet and Second Avenue Klezmer Ensemble.

San Diego

As part of its ongoing commitment to cultural diversity and responsible banking,Union Bank, N.A., partnered with KPBS to honor 17 local individuals who are making a difference to enrich the lives of others. The honorees were announced as part of the 2011 Cultural Diversity Partnership, which recognizes and pays tribute to local heroes from eight diverse communities who are making a difference by improving their workplace, profession, neighborhood, community, region and the world. The year-long celebration of diversity culminated with an awards ceremony held, at the Balboa Theater in San Diego, where recipients were formally recognized.

Woman

Union Bank Honors Our Heroes

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Transitions

with Carol

LeBeau

MASSAGE…Great for your Health!

I just made an appointment for a massage. And I don’t feel the least bit guilty about it. Truth is, I used to think spending money for a massage was selfindulgent and a waste of money. Massage has a reputation for being no more than a decadent treat… only for those who can afford such luxury. For years, I agreed. Though there were a few occasions for which I justified the extravagance. My first massage was at a resort in Sedona…where Tom and I were celebrating our tenth wedding anniversary. A couple’s massage was part of the weekend package. What the heck! After ten years, we could both use the creative combination of pampering and romance! It was great. A year later, I decided to run the San Diego Rock ‘n Roll Marathon. During a long training run, my left hamstring seized. I cried like a baby as Wayne, a local sports massage therapist, drove his elbow into my hip. Anything but relaxing, Wayne used trigger point therapy…an effective, but intense, massage technique to help relax the spasms in my muscle. It seems for many of us, a massage is unnecessary or self-indulgent unless it’s therapy or a special occasion. But if a growing body of research continues to pan out, you may not want to wait

for your next back tweak or a vacation getaway to book your next massage. New studies show massage has a variety of tangible health benefits. Research over the past couple of years has found that massage therapy boosts immune function in women with breast cancer, improves symptoms in children with asthma, and increase grip strength in patients with carpal tunnel syndrome. And get this! Giving massages to the littlest patients…premature babies… helped in the crucial task of gaining weight! The benefits go beyond feelings of relaxation and wellness many of us experience after a massage. The American College of Physicians and the American Pain Society now include massage as one of their recommendations for treating low back pain. New research is revealing what really happens in the body after a massage. There have been many theories about how massage works…from releasing toxins to improving circulation. But these have been fairly nebulous, with little hard evidence. Now, one study, for example, found a single, 45-minute massage led to a small reduction in the level of cortisol, a stress hormone, in the blood…a decrease in cytokine proteins related to inflammation and allergic reactions…and a boost in white blood cells that fight infection. And it’s not just the alternative medicine community singing the praises of massage. Studies on the health benefits of massage are so compelling the National Institutes of Health (NIH) is spending close to $3 million on massage research this year. The NIH’s Jack Kline says, “There is emerging evidence that massage can make contributions in treating things like pain, where conventional medicine doesn’t have all the answers.” Wow! Could a medicinal massage be better than a pain pill? Could insurance coverage be far behind? Stay tuned. For now, you can be sure the benefits of a relaxing rubdown go beyond feelings of relaxation and wellness and may just be worth the extra time and money when it comes to your health.

Kickin' It Challenge Soccer and breast cancer advocacy are coming together for the first time in San Diego. The Kickin’ It Challenge, a two-day soccer tournament that will donate all proceeds to the San Diego Affiliate of the Susan G. Komen for the Cure Breast Cancer Foundation, will be held June 23rd-June 24th at the Frances Ryan Park in Escondido, California. The tournament is the first of its kind in San Diego, hosted by the Poway Vaqueros, with fields provided by the City of Escondido. More than 120 youth soccer teams are expected to "Unite in the Fight" against breast cancer. The tournament hopes to raise at least $20,000 for the San Diego Affiliate of the Susan G. Komen for the Cure Breast Cancer Foundation and to show young soccer players how to make a direct impact in their community while doing something they love. Visit their site at http://e7sports.us/orgs/poway/kickin/index.php or contact the Tournament Director Toni DeCarlo at 760-525-4213 or by email at tsoccertoni@aol.com


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San Diego

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Go ahead. Browse freely. www.Womego.com

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San Diego Woman actively supports all local women's publications

Publication name actively supports all local womenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s publications


And they’re off…to the seaside Del Mar Racetrack to place their bets and register their bonnets at the One & Only Truly Fabulous Hats Contest. Sponsored by the San Diego Hat Company, the 17th annual hat contest attracted almost 47,000 people for the Thoroughbred Club’s opening day 2011. 2011 was a big year for hats. Even folks who avoided coverage of the April 29, 2011 Royal Wedding heard about Princess Beatrice’s outlandish “fallopian tube” hat. Considered the worst headdress worn at Kate and William’s wedding, Princess Beatrice’s hat sold for $131,000 on May 22, 2011. The proceeds went to UNICEF. A good end for a bad hat. THE ARTIST silently asked moviegoers, “Who’s That Girl” in the white and black hat? The 2011 black and white French film received 10 nominations and won 5 Academy Awards including Best Costume Design. “Looking good never looked so good” purrs the Cavalier-hatted Shrek 2 spin-off cat on the 2011 DreamWorks PUSS IN BOOTS movie poster. Hollywood plays a big part at the Del Mar Racetrack. Co-founder Bing Crosby personally greeted fans at the gate when Del Mar opened in 1937. Crosby’s partners included actors Pat O’Brien, Jimmy Durante, and Oliver Hardy as well as automobile dealer Charles S. Howard. Guests to the track included W.C. Fields and Marilyn Monroe. And let us not forget about the horses. The legendary match race between Charles S. Howard’s Seabiscuit and Binglin Stable’s colt Ligaroti was the first nationwide broadcast of a thoroughbred race by NBC radio. Seabiscuit won by a nose before going on to greater fame. The fun starts by registering your hat at 11:30AM. You have to pay to park your car as well as buy a general admission ticket to enter the racetrack. However, you do not pay a penny to enter your headdress at one of four hat contest category registration tables in the Stretch Run Plaza de Mexico between 11:30AM-3:00PM. All registered hat contestants receive 2 free admission passes to a future race and a coveted paddock pass to the Walking Ring prior to the start of Race ONE at 2:00PM. All hat contestants also have the chance to strut their stuff in the Stretch Run Plaza de Mexico or stand on the sidelines to watch the hat parade at 3:00PM. First, second, and third place Hat Contest winners receive $300, $200, and $100 respectively in each of the following four categories: 1) Best Flowers/Others 2) Funniest or Most Outrageous 3) Most Glamorous 4) Best Racing Theme The Bing Crosby Grand Prize winner of the hats contest receives 2 round-trip American Airlines vouchers for travel anywhere in the United States.

AUTHOR: A Boston native, Lesley University graduate, and 2011 Del Mar hat day contestant, Erin now live in Poway with her husband, pet therapy dog, and cantankerous cat. She has worn many hats, including cashier, teller, and paralegal before becoming a freelance writer. Erin is working on a pictorial history of hats. Former professional model Carol Bader owns and operates the DEL MAR HAT COMPANY retail storefront, work studio, and website www.delmarhatco.com. Bader’s creations have appeared in 2011 issues of People Magazine, Coastal Living Magazine, Ranch and Coast, and San Diego Magazine. Call 888-424-HATS (4287) for studio hours and appointments. Founders Teresa Gardner and Andrew Bleecher started the SAN DIEGO HAT COMPANY www.sandiegohat.com from their garage after a trip to Bali in 1993. They personally visited each factory to ensure quality and working conditions. Their design team traveled to Tokyo, Paris, London, New York, San Francisco, and Southern California for their Spring/Summer 2012 collection. The VILLAGE HAT SHOP has four Southern California stores (Hillcrest, Seaport Village, Long Beach, and Sacramento); a wholesale showroom at 3443 India Street, San Diego; a website www.villagehatshop.com; and a toll-free number 1-888-VHS-HATS to help you find that perfect hat.

San Diego

by Erin Ruocco

So throw your hat into the ring. Who knows you may find yourself in the winner’s circle.

Woman

A DAY AT THE SAN DIEGO HAT COMPANY RACES

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Photo by Stephanie Sundell

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Date Night

Model: Seymone Morgan Model Mayhem # 1168976 Makeup by Melly


San Diego

Woman

Photo by Stephanie Sundell

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Model: Arianna Araujo Model Mayhem #1867165 Makeup by Melly


Fashion For All Photos by Lisa K. Miller Stylist: Jaime V. Habert Hair & Makeup by Dezi V, Deziv.com Assistant: Norma Haydee Smith

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Model: Kristi Nelson Model Mayhem #652417

Clothing and Accessories Courtesy of Tres Chic Boutique Poway, California Model: Kristi Nelson Model Mayhem #652417


San Diego

Woman

Devon Young

Model: Jasmine Rubalcaba Model Mayhem #2236297

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Model: Jasmine Rubalcaba Model Mayhem #2236297


Photo by Stephanie Sundell

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Trashy Chic by

Erin Fader

Model: Hollyanne Hendrix www.wix.com/hollyanneee/model Makeup by Melly

Large Brass Heart Locket & Vintage Handkerchief Ring


San Diego

Woman

Photo by Stephanie Sundell

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Vegan Suede Vintage Deco Earrings

Model: Arianna Araujo Model Mayhem #1867165 Makeup by Melly


Vintage Lucite Button Ring

Vintage Disco Deco Turquoise Hammered Ring

Photos Courtesy of Erin Fader

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Trashy Chic by Erin Fader

SHOP

Vintage Midnight Glass Earrings Cruelty Free Peacock Feather Vintage Bib Necklace

All items can be found at www.etsy.com/shop/TrashyChic


He Said, She

Said

Photos by Lisa K. Miller

Are men really from Mars and Women from Venus, as author Dr. John Gray states in his bestselling book? Do men and women really see things that differently? If given the same question could their answers really be so different? At San Diego Woman we wanted to explore the differences between "them" and "us". Read this month's installment and find out how the sexes differ when it comes to communicating with each other. What topics would you like to see us duke it out over in upcoming issues? No topic is off limits, so write me at editor@sandiegowoman.com. I can't wait to hear from you!

Fashion for men? Now, you wouldn’t think it was that hard for men considering that they only have a few basic wardrobe pieces from which to draw. With women the style changes every 5 minutes, so it is a lot tougher for us to keep up with the trends. Yet, so many men are fashion challenged. Come on, how can you get pants, shirt, shoes, underwear and socks wrong? Imagine if you had to coordinate slips, bras, shoes, panties, jewelry, hairstyles, dresses, skirts, pants, culottes, purses, stockings, thigh highs, knee highs mini-skirts, maxi-skirts, midi-skirts, etc… etc… etc. But yet with all of these options, women for the most part get it right. No we may not all be fashionistas, but most of us know that it isn’t right to wear sneakers with a mini skirt or high heels with knee socks, (unless you are Britney Spears) but why do men not understand that sandals and white socks do not turn us on. I do get the concept of wearing what is comfortable, but every woman knows if you came to the door to pick us up for a date and we were dressed this way, you would ask why we were not ready? Yet you can show up dressed the exact same way, and if there were no stains on your t-shirt, you would consider yourself appropriately dressed for the best restaurant in town. Those heels you mentioned, obviously you don’t understand the concept behind heels. The shoes most of us crave are the designer heels like those gorgeous Louboutins. They are not made for walking. When we are accessorizing our outfits, standing in front of our shoe racks, there is a formula that we consider in our heads, based upon the amount of time we will be vertical. For example, are we going out to a restaurant where we will be immediately seated, or will we have to stand around the bar waiting for our table. Is there a parking structure or lot directly adjacent to our final destination, and how long will we actually be at the event. If the formula allows for it and we will not be on our feet for long periods of time, we can pull out the Louboutins, but if not it may be the more sensible (and yes ugly) Birkenstocks. And let’s face it, you guys would much rather see us in 6 inch sexy heels than flat rubber clogs. As for asking that age old question “Does my butt look big in this outfit,” of course we ask. Women are insecure at heart. Even a super model will tell you that there is a part of her face or body that she dislikes. Yet a man could be short, fat and bald and he will stick out his chest and admire his profile thinking to himself, “Damn I look good today!” So of course you don’t ask us if we like the way you look; so how do we ever get to give our input if we don’t come out and ask you, “Are you really gonna wear that?”

San Diego

Fashion, for men, seems like an oxymoron. It’s like most of us are lost to the art of dressing ourselves. Unfortunately, the battle rages on and men have a big red X on our chests. You can say, “You’re not going to wear that, are you?” Followed by the raised eyebrow and tilted head and rolling eyes. We on the other hand cannot repeat the same to you, and there are times we really, really need to. You get to ask the question, “Does this make my butt look too big?” While we know the endgame – whatever we say is wrong, either to you or us. Hint: If you have to ask, it is. Many times we’d like to ask why you are going to show so much of your breasts. Now, don’t get me wrong, we like it – everywhere! But if you’re going to complain about the ogling and whistles then either wear a bigger necklace or a higher neckline. It’s that simple. Remember the definition of insanity: Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. The difference between fashion and style is simple: Fashion is what you’re constantly trying to keep up with and style is what compliments you more completely without the chase. Style is Levis and a ‘cute’ blouse with simple accessories. Fashion says you will either layer this season (three months, tops!) or wear colors that don’t match anyone’s season. (As a quick sidebar, what in the world are you doing wearing the shoes today. You can’t stand or walk in them – we can see the tortured stress on your faces). Style says wear what looks best for you – YOU – and not some fashionista from New York or Paris. There’s not a man out there who won’t look at you if you’re wearing something that doesn’t look good on you – we’re dogs and know it. But the women you dress for will judge you and, to me, it takes more strength of character to dress with what is best for you than to chase the elusive paradigm of fashion. Here’s where the male of the species come in: We wear what we feel looks best on us. I’ll grant you we make tons of mistakes, but when dress up time comes we usually rally. Man puts on suit, man likes the attention. Grunt. Ladies, we admit we’re challenged fashion and style wise, and we do need some help, but PLEASE stop with the rolling of the eyes and that sigh before you ask us what the hell we’re doing with “that on.”

She Said...

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He Said...

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Fitness

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PHOTOGRAPHY BY: BLINKit PHOTOGRAPHY MUA/HAIR: Mernette Hayes-Martin WARDROBE - KNOXX GEAR www.blinkitphotography.com


San Diego

Woman

PHOTOGRAPHY BY: BLINKit PHOTOGRAPHY

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PHOTOGRAPHY BY: BLINKit PHOTOGRAPHY


Muscles Remember What the Mind Can Forget By Ann Heizer

for many conditions, exercise is the No. 1 treatment. Not long ago, employees at a health clinic in Vista proved my point – they were handing out prescriptions to walk! Whether it’s walking, gardening, or training to run a five-minute mile, the key to any successful exercise program is to enjoy it. Maybe you’ve never worked out. Maybe you think you’re over the hill. I don’t buy it, and neither does your muscle memory. I have the privilege of working with adults who are 65 and older. In that capacity, I have inspired many seniors to rediscover their muscle memory and to open pathways to activities they used to enjoy. Through guided-imagery, brain exercises, grounding techniques and concentration, seniors can activate muscles they hardly ever use. The end result is a heightened sense of confidence, strength, balance and awareness. All this carries from the exercise studio right into daily life. That’s something your muscles, your mind, and your spirit won’t forget. Ann Heizer is a certified personal trainer and group exercise instructor. To learn more about Ann’s fitness programs, visit www.annheizer.com or call (760) 612-5557.

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For anyone who wishes to start a fitness program, here’s something not to forget: Your muscles have memory. Perhaps you knew that – or maybe you forgot – but movements from earlier stages in your life are filed away in your fascia and muscle memory. Let that be a comfort as you begin a fitness program. Maybe you haven’t exercised for many years, but you were an athlete in high school. As you rev up your exercise program, the muscles and the synapses that trigger them will spring back to life: Aha! A brisk walk! Leg activation. Arm-swinging. Balance. Posture. I remember that! You might not run the five-minute mile and please, don’t try. Start slowly. Muscle memory is powerful, but give it the help it needs and build your strength little by little. The rewards of rebooting the dark corners of muscle memory are many. Studies show more than half of the US population takes at least one prescription drug. Meanwhile, researchers agree that

44 Professional Gloves is the premier baseball custom glove manufacturer that believes a professional quality glove at a great price should be available to all, from weekend athletes to pro players at the games highest level. Having the ability to custom design each & every detail in a baseball glove gives the athlete a definite edge in performance not to mention how good our gloves look in any color you choose. So join the many others out there who have selected 44 Pro Gloves to be their custom made baseball glove manufacturer.

Check out 44 Pro Gloves at: www.44progloves.com or call (858) 776-9361


Fitness Shake-up

By Jaime V. Habert

Tired of waking up every morning and running to the treadmill? Bored of your monotonous gym routine? If you are finding yourself counting down the seconds till you can hop off the treadmill, then it’s time to shake-up your fitness routine! That’s why I have compiled some of the most unique and challenging exercise options for your everyday workout routine.

Boxing

Boxing can be intimidating to the average passerby. I mean, we are talking about a sport where people purposefully attack each other in order to “win” in an enclosed arena. This preconceived notion may be right about the professional sport, but boxing as a fitness regime is far different. Being a huge fan of boxing for fitness, I can

The Boxing Club 8650 Genesee Avenue, San Diego, CA 92122 (858) 622-1903 www.theboxingclub.net

Ballet

Tu-Tu’s are optional but strengthening and lengthening your muscles is not. Ballet classes are a great alternative to your everyday routine. Beginning ballet classes offer an emphasis on body placement, flexibility, balance, alignment, strength, and technique. An increase in posture is just the beginning in these classes where you will learn full body ballet movements and sequences. You don’t need ballet experience to participate but, you will find yourself wanting more after just one session. Watch out Alvin Ailey. Where you can find it:

Balletiquette Dance School 3060 Clairemont Dr. San Diego CA 92117 619-276-1300

San Diego

I know what you are thinking, THERE IS NO WAY I AM GOING TO TRY POLE DANCING. But, you must! Coming from that opinion, I can tell you that I was, and you are, completely misinformed about the art of pole fitness. Let me start by saying that the best way to experience pole fitness is with a group of girlfriends. Plan a girl’s night out and get your workout done at the same time. You will begin the class with some simple warm up stretching and dancing, and move into the most basic of moves using the pole. In the beginning class, you are more likely to dance with the pole and use it for balance than to be swinging around it. Pole dancing leaves you feeling empowered and sexy, a result I have yet to find with any other workout.

Woman

Pole Dancing

personally tell you that a boxing class is full of cardio endurance and weight lifting. Most classes begin with a quick cardio warm-up such as jumping rope, running in place, or performing a sequence of jumping jacks and punches. Next, you will pair up with a hanging bag and begin learning simple boxing jabs, hooks, and uppercuts. Once you have the basics down, you will learn sequences and perform each as the instructor yells them out, simultaneously dropping to your knees to do push-ups between sets. Finally, you will pair up with a partner to juggle medicine balls and cool down with some duo stretching. When you get up to leave, your legs may feel a little like jell-o, but your confidence and core will be as strong as nails.

Where you can find it: LA Boxing 13179 Black Mountain Road San Diego, CA 92129 (858) 484-7269 www.laboxing.com/ranchopenasquitos

Where you can find it: Sumara Pole Fitness & Dance Center6904 Miramar Rd., Ste. 103 San Diego, CA 92121 858-472-9835

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When Did Things Change? By Glenda Batzer

I really don't want to admit that I am not a kid anymore. But it is true. Maybe I should give you some background information first. I was a child during the 1960's. I am the oldest girl in a family of eight children. Life felt so very different in my small secluded mid-western town as compared to life in a city even in the 1960's. My family was a hard-working modest family just like so many others. We were a cookie cutter suburban American Family at the tail end of the baby boom following World War II or at least that was my interpretation. The best thing about my childhood was that the rules were clear and concise. You knew how to behave and you knew what was expected of you. Our house was filled with rules. Some examples of these rules were as follows; Rule #1: We were required to be up at 6:00 AM even on weekends to do chores. Rule #2: Saturday nights were spent practicing penmanship drills. Rule #3: Children were meant to be seen and not heard.

Rule #4: All adults were addressed as Mr. or Mrs. and under no circumstances would you address ANY adult by his or her first name. Nor would you address a woman older than you as “Miss” or “Sweetie” or “Hon”. Living with these rules did seem a bit like a dictatorship and to some extent it was, and my Mother was the ruling Dictator. But we were never in a position to question her authority or to try to “buck” the system. My world was predictable. This made me feel secure and happy. So, with that I ask you “Where was I when all of this changed”? In the 1960's, the pace of life was slow and steady. Men and women dressed up to be seen in public. Women put on pantyhose and pearls to go to the grocery store. Men wore hats and suits to work. Society was so proper and civilized. Fast forward to 2012. No one cares how they behave in public. Men and Women don't even care how they are seen in public. I saw a couple the other day in full pajamas at the grocery store ! Really ! I was shocked and embarrassed for them. Everyone is in a rush to go somewhere, I am just not sure where. The pace of life hovers around warp speed. The news is filled with natural disasters, fighting and our government flashing displays of bad behavior. I admit I have taken you on a joy ride thru part of my childhood and here is the reason I even bring any of this up. I would like to reinstate a rule listed above from my childhood that I used as an example as Rule #4. I hate when someone younger than me calls me “Miss”. Or “Sweetie” or “Hon”. To this day I address my parents friends as Mr. or Mrs. Even though I have known them for decades, I would never call them by their first names out of RESPECT. Even in the workplace, you have much younger bosses just because they are from a different generation and they have several degrees after their names. I don't begrudge them, I just don't know when mature adults such as myself were bumped from the bus. I feel that as a grown-up I have done the time and have subsequently earned the right to be addressed and listened to as an Elder. I am disappointed that younger people today show no respect for their elders or maybe they never knew they were supposed to be respectful. I look at it as a lost art that needs to be reinstated in 2012. So today I am reminding everyone to slow down their pace of life, learn to appreciate and respect your elders and overall just “BREATHE”.


Fa b u l o u s Fi n d s

The LJFFF is designed to showcase the best in fashion films within the context of their creators. This year's festival will be at the Museum of Contemporary Art San Diego in La Jolla. The much sought after parties and receptions will give attendees the chance to meet and mingle on a more casual basis with top professionals, actors,models, and industry representatives.

Wake Up to a Beautiful New You!

Have you ever thought how nice it would be to wake up ready to face your day with your makeup on.isKathy Babathat canspecializes make thisin happen for you. Kathymakeup. is a pro at PermaKathy a real artist natural looking permanent She uses organic, mri safe pigment, with special two stage numbing technique. nent Makeup and enjoys creating beauty every day. Aside from the long list of clients Brows, Eyeliner, Lips who rave about her work, are the Paramedical clients she works with who are facing additional chalProcedures: Areola repigmentation lenges. Kathy volunteers her time and services with Angel faces, an organization that Receding Hairline Pigmentation helps bring change to the life of severe burn victims. Kathy does her magic, helping to Call Kathy for a free consultation! 760 271-1393 www.naturallypermanent.com provide cosmetic assistance to make these women feel good about themselves once Mention this ad for 10% off again. In addition, she also helps cancer survivors with Areola Reconstruction to help make their breasts look as beautiful as they were before surgery. For more information visit http://www.naturallypermanent.com

San Diego

One of the biggest events in fashion and film will be taking place on July 26-28th in La Jolla. This festival is the world's largest gathering of fashion film professionals. Directors will be attending and exhibiting from Europe, North America, Asia, and South America, the La Jolla Fashion Film Festival has once again become the center of intense focus of iconic fashion brands and their filmmakers, to see in what direction this new phenomenon is moving.

Metamorphosis By Kathy Baba

Woman

Don’t Miss the 3rd Annual La Jolla Fashion Film Festival!

Fashion cinema is revolutionizing fashion marketing, and LJFFF is at the cutting edge. The LJFFF combines cinema, social media, and fashion into one of the world’s premiere digital fashion events. Ultimately, the goal is to go beyond previous digital barriers and limitations to create new digital distribution channels, networks and markets for the benefit of both the designers and consumer. For More Information and to Purchase Tickets visit their website at www.LJFFF.com. Or contact Fred Sweet at 619-889-3238.

Paisley Design Studios

Tres Chic Boutique

If you are in search of a local quaint boutique with all of the new fashion trends, stop by Tres Chic Boutique on Midland Road in Poway. Whether you are looking for a new outfit for a special event or a hot new trendy style to amaze your friends, Tres Chic is the place to go for some of the best Retail Therapy around. The owner and friendly staff are there to serve you. Check Page 24-25 to see some of their styles. For personalized attention visit Tres Chic Boutique at 14043 Midland Rd (between Edgemoor St & Temple St) Poway, CA 92064

At Paisley Design Studios each piece is unique and meticulously handmade by the artist. Born in the northern region of Iran by the Caspian Sea, the creator of these beautiful and unique pieces of art, utilizes elements of her heritage. Most enchanting pieces include the paisley design, which is a symbol of respect: Legend has it that it is the Cyprus tree bowing to the wind. Growing up amongst this beautiful scenery designer, Gelareh Golchin, was greatly influenced by the lines of nature, the harmony of the environment and the juxtaposition of the different materials that Mother Nature so beautifully balanced together. These elements are found in the beauty of the wearable art she creates. Visit her website at www.PaisleyDesignJewelry.com

Camibands..The Ultimate Accessory

Use your Camiband under plunging V-Necks to elegantly cover cleavage, as a shirt extender, or as a bathing suit cover-up. They are the ultimate wardrobe necessity. Check out their website for new fabrics and colors including our favorite animal print. Visit them at www.camibands.com Once you own one, you won’t know how you lived without it.

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Woman of Distinction

Dr. Christy Chen Dentist, Wife, Mother, Friend, & Valued Citizen By Barbara K. Cooper Christy Chen is a very accomplished woman. She’s a dentist, with practices in Escondido and Carmel Valley. She’s a wife and mother, personally devoting herself to a beloved husband, young son and daughter and their home in the Scripps Ranch area. And, professionally devoting herself to her patients and our North County Community. As Dr. Chen so enthusiastically explains, “A dentist is a great combination of being an artist, a scientist, an engineer, a psychologist, and a therapist at the same time!” Immigrating to the United States from Taiwan as a teen with her parents and two siblings, the family settled in Alhambra, CA. Cal State was her choice for undergraduate studies. Professional choices often begin with a twist – in Dr Chen’s case, it started with a cavity! In her junior year of college she painfully availed herself to a close friend who was taking her dental board competency exam and needed a perfect patient and case scenario. Familiarizing herself with the dental field, Dr. Chen realized her vocation. So after graduation, it was on to Northwestern University in Chicago, IL to obtain her Doctor of Dental Surgery in 1996. Deciding to set up practice in Escondido was an easy choice for Dr Chen, owed to its history and diverse ethnic population. The Carmel Valley office has a newer family base, so in establishing a second practice in 2005, she brought her expertise to this growing area. Winning the trust of her patients and delivering comprehensive dental care is paramount to Dr Chen. She added, “In family practice, geriatric patients are seen more for restorations and young patients require encouragement for good oral hygiene habits, but family practice also includes being certified for implants, orthodontics, conscious sedation, always making patients feel comfortable with gratifying results.” Dr. Chen is a member of the American, California, and San Diego County Dental Societies. ‘Giving back’ in our community is essential to her, as she participates in the ‘Share a Smile’ national program, providing free prophy and sealants to underprivileged children. She offers training to our next generation of dentists through externship programs and UCSD pre-dental society, as well as personally volunteering.

Dr Chen’s Chinese heritage is acknowledged throughout her life, although admittedly being more Americanized than her parents; both Chinese and Western holidays are celebrated. Mandarin, the official Chinese language, is spoken at home so that the children will always have a common thread with their grandparents and keep strong family bonds. The children also attend North County Chinese School on Saturdays to further instill Chinese culture and traditions, as well as subscribing to Chinese educational programs from Taiwan, with books, DVDs and children’s programs. I inquired of Dr Chen’s opinion regarding ‘women in dentistry’ and that old ‘glass ceiling’ scenario and any advice for young women considering her field. A couple of statistics immediately came to her mind, “In 2009, 44 percent graduating dentists were women and in 2010, 22 percent of practicing dentists were women. So, yes, the glass ceiling is less apparent, but the stereotype of the male dentist seems to stubbornly persist.” Her most obvious personal observation being that while at dental conventions with her husband, who is not a dentist, he will be addressed rather than her. Also, she notes that her tools of trade, the dental instruments and equipment, have always been made for larger male hands and just recently are being retooled with improved design and taking women’s physical size into consideration. Would she advise women to follow her lead, “Yes, absolutely! Dentistry is a great career for women as it offers so many options and patients appreciate the gentle touch a woman dentist brings to the field.” Dr Chen plans to continue her practice for many years ahead, perhaps teaching as well, as the personal satisfaction she derives from the interaction with her patients is a priceless reward. What is the key to balancing her busy life? She states succinctly “Focus, focus, focus! Working efficiently and productively in the office.” Being an overall happy person, she chooses to reflect on good and let go of any unhappy situations. With a loving and supportive husband who shares common interests and philosophy of raising children, supportive extended families who have always been cheerleaders, life is full and rewarding. Weekly date night is a must, usually dining at a favorite restaurant like Pacifica’s in Del Mar, or Cavillion in Santa Luz. A couples skiing get-away, and travel abroad on occasion add to their full life. “The ‘bucket list’ seems to get longer each year!” Her children are her greatest accomplishments; her career, her patients and friendships (established throughout the years) follow. Dr Chen concluded, “Most importantly, I need to stay healthy to keep up with all the demands in my life, so I exercise at least three times a week and smile always, it’s easy!”


Coming Soon! Our New Estate Jewelry Department

San Diego

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Located Adjacent to our Current Location.

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Woman San Diego

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wished she knew before she got started, she almost always says, "I wish I knew I didn't have to know it all." Our businesses are fluid - they change, they grow, and it's really important not to get hung up on small details just because we want it to be perfect. Striving to have everything just right before we launch our business keeps you driving in a loop instead of driving forward. You must let go of creating something perfect and just start creating.

Getting started in business is extremely thrilling, but nonetheless tough. There is no true way to mentally prepare yourself for that great idea that comes to you in the middle of the night, or the realization that you can make a product better. When you get the itch to branch off from your current employment and start your own business, it’s a feeling of pure elation. However, when that moment does come (if it has not already), it can be a harsh reality that the “idea” is only a small part of the equation. Being in the professional world for almost 10 years and providing female entrepreneurs with the resources to get their business off the ground has given me much insight into the mind of a female entrepreneur. Sometimes those helpful reminders of what not to do are just as, if not more, important as the “to do.” Here are three pitfalls that I have seen entrepreneurs commonly fall into and some tips on how to avoid them. 1. Perfection Syndrome As women, we like to be as prepared as possible when we make the entrepreneurial leap, and understandably so. However, every time we speak to a successful entrepreneur and ask her what she

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By Stephanie Burns, Founder & Co-Owner of Chic CEO

3. Pricing too low Starting out as a new business owner, we try to stay as lean as possible. In order to get things done, we might use free interns, barter our time or use trade. These things are necessary and help us to grow our businesses without spending money we simply don't have. Problems do arise, however, when you price your products or services without factoring in this "free" labor. If you use an intern to help you with your data entry, you've saved yourself that labor cost, but what happens when you actually have to start paying someone to do this job? Have you factored that in to the pricing of your product/service? Make sure you price your products/services as if you were paying someone that data entry wage so when the time comes, your margins aren't drastically reduced.

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Three Common Pitfalls Entrepreneurs Fall Into And How To Avoid Them

2. Fear of Networking All new startups must network – it is a fact. You cannot hit publish on your website, sit back and watch the money flow in. I wish it worked that way! Getting out there, talking to people and making connections is key to getting your business started. My business partner and I attend two to three networking events a week to promote Chic CEO and meet new people. One of our favorite networking groups is 6 Degrees San Diego. They have one of the biggest professional networking groups in San Diego and each one is held in a new venue. We've also partnered with 6 Degrees to power their women's only networking mixers called San Diego SAVVY. Networking can be really intimidating at first but after your first few events, it gets much easier and you'll start to enjoy it. Networking has become a very important part of our business and is a really important tool for startups. Get out there and start talking!

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When you tap into your inner entrepreneurial empress, remember that it is not about perfection or having a product that sells itself; it’s about having the business savvy to take your idea to the next level and avoiding pitfalls that can slow you down. About the author: Stephanie Burns is the Founder & Co-Owner of Chic CEO . Chic CEO is a free online resource for female entrepreneurs that provides the ground level information needed to get started with owning your own business, creating a product or starting a franchise. Chic CEO also provides an offline network, San Diego SAVVY, the women’s arm of 6 Degrees, a networking organization dedicated to increasing professionals’ network of contacts. For more information about Chic CEO, visit www.chic-ceo.com


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Business Intelligence By Bill Edmett Thinking About Putting Your You can begin with a Google search, using any of these underlined phrases. For example, if you want an Application Developer in San Diego, you could use Google by searching “Application Developer Business on the Internet? This information is intended for a business decision maker and not for a technical person. I’m assuming that as a decision maker you’ll delegate the technical work to an employee or consultant that stays current with the latest technologies of their industry. There will be a cost and you need to decide if you’ll get a good return on any investment.

San Diego” and you’ll find me, hopefully on page one and close to the top, because I pay someone to deal with the “Google Dance” for me. For now, he’s a good SEO resource, but I watch closely to make sure he really stays on his toes.

SEO and the Google Dance:

My research indicates that online spending reached $226 billion this year and will increase to $325 billion per year in the next 4 years. I think it’s fair to say that potential customers expect you to have a website. It has even become a matter of credibility and if you have a website while your competitors don’t then you’ll have an advantage.

As you probably know, Google, Yahoo and Bing are common searching tools where most people would begin if they’re looking for your product or services. Google, Yahoo and Bing use software programs of their own that are frequently referred to as spiders or crawlers. Google, Yahoo and Bing use these programs to crawl and read websites the world over, 24 hours per day and 7 days per week. They just read websites and collect whatever you have to say. They’ll store you content and index it using elusive algorithms or formulas to reward or even penalize you with good or bad positions in the search results. So if you’re in the real estate business, expecting web surfers to use Google with the search words “real estate San Diego” you find about 141 million items in 0.3 seconds. That’s impressive but won’t help you unless you can rise to the top 1 to 10 positions on the very first page. So get some help from someone who knows how to do it. I mean someone who knows the best methods for this month, not the best methods last month. The spiders and crawlers and the indexing methods do change. From my research Google changes their algorithms nearly 10 times each year, so it can be elusive. If you speak with several SEO experts, you’ll find that they often contradict each other, simply because Google, Yahoo and Bing are always trying to stay ahead of marketing people who try to game them. Google knows that you’ll trust them more if search results are to a searchers satisfaction and not just to the satisfaction of a marketing person. If you work with SEO you might see excellent results overnight or it may take a few months, but if you stay with it, it will eventually pay off.

A Static Website or a Dynamic Website?

Think about investing in the Internet.

You might find it interesting to know a very brief history of the Internet. It began with the development of computers in 1950 and has evolved to what we now commonly refer to as the World Wide Web (www), when in 1995 the last restrictions against commercial use of the Internet were removed. Since then the Internet has been used to carry commercial information all over the world. So the Internet has been around for a while, but it was only recently available for us to use in business and social media.

Why put your business on the Internet?

A static website is simply one or more web pages with information and visual graphics to advertise your product or services, with no user interaction beyond navigating from one page to another. It’s something like a Yellow Page ad or a brochure and is good place to start. A dynamic website is more complex and allows for the visitor to enter information or request information. Examples of a dynamic website are online banking or online department store purchasing. A dynamic website will require a database to store information.

What you’ll need.

You’ll need a Domain Name otherwise referred to as a URL (uniform resource identifier), one that someone else hasn’t already purchased. This might not be easy because it seems that all the good ones are taken. If you’re in the real estate business, you’ll have to forget about www.realestate. com because some smart person grabbed it right away, I’m guessing probably fifteen years ago. You’ll also need a Hosting Service which is a place to park your website. You’ll need an Application Developer to build your website. And you’ll need an e-Commerce provider if you’re going to collect money for your product or service on the Internet. You may also benefit from an SEO (Search Engine Optimization) expert if you’ll want people to easily find you when they’re surfing the Internet.

So if you’re not yet on the Internet you should seriously think about it. Chances are your business will improve once you’ve established a presence on the World Wide Web.


A guide for family, friends and loved ones in preparing for the effects of the growing elder population â&#x20AC;Śa Public Service from â&#x20AC;&#x153;Those Who Careâ&#x20AC;?

Cloud-based Home Health Monitoring Standing around the boatyard the other day with a bunch of saddened sailors who can only dream of Summertime, and once again being on the water with our boats, I happen to notice that 3 out of 4 (I'm the 4th) sailors had in hand the new IPhone 4, and at one point or another, using this new toy for various reasons. Suddenly, two of the sailors bumped phones - I mean they actually touched their phones together.

that patient to the hospital within the first three days after discharge.

What is that all about? Of course I needed to ask what I was missing. They softened my ignorance by telling me about "cloud technology," and various other innovations that seem to come so readily to these tech-savvy sailors (I don't even use electronic GPS/ compass on my sailboat). Seems that in today's world (and if you have Apple technology at hand) you can take a picture on your IPhone 4 and it will automatically send that photo to your other Apple based devices, for example your MacBook Pro computer!

I'm happy to see technology doing more for us than merely an hourly Angry Bird distraction. It is pretty amazing if you think about it, especially when our brains turn to how it can help with patient care. Believe it or not, I may even consider using a GPS on my boat this season - or maybe not.

We all know that telehealth has been developing in the last decade, with home monitoring being a primary focus. This is where a patient, whether recently discharged from a hospital or not, has his home connected, via special monitors, etc., so that doctors and other health professionals can monitor vital signs, as well as getsome idea of the patient's physical appearance. Enter Independa, a company offering technology-enabled independent-living solutions (usually at more cost effective levels). They will be rolling out (sometime in 2012) their "cloud-based" home health monitoring system. Of course, this system will allow for the recording of biometric information; such as "weight, blood pressure, glucose level, temperature, pulse, heart rate - using the basic and universally available phone." Even if you didn't miss the important part here, it is worth repeating -- this will all be processed via a normal, everyday, ordinary telephone. For tech savvy folks out there, this may seem like no big deal at all, but for me, I was blown away. It means that those requiring some form of monitoring their medical needs can have that done over their everyday phone, with no special cell phone service necessary or special monitors in the house, etc. This opens up nearly the entire country to this type of home health based monitoring, and possibly without the level of home visits currently performed by home health agencies (e.g., Visiting Nurses Association). The information you transmit over the regular landline phone is "converted into digital form and delivered to Independa's cloudbased telecare solution, CloudCare." This obviously will offer medical professionals much more up-to-the-minute information on a patient's status; thus helping to prevent the often urgent return of

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(Info in part from: http://www.smartplanet.com/blog/rethinking-healthcare/cloud-based-home-health-monitoring-service-works-with-yourphone/7795?tag=search-river.)

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The bumping and sharing data seemed to be focused on sharing music, but I'm sure it was more complicated than that. This all lead me to think about the progress in home health monitoring systems and thus this issue's message (please be aware that I am far from a "techie" and as such the following information will only scratch the surface of what is now happening in this fascinating world).

Of course, this does not replace the need for home-based monitors, actual personal home health visits, etc., but it does allow for nearly instantaneous connection to the patient's health care providers. Such a connection is vital in providing the care essential in monitoring of a patient during the transition from hospital to home.

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Honey Chaser There have been few books in which I have been totally enthralled, Honey Chaser is one of these books. The story itself is intriguing with the plot twists and turns and unlimited amount of surprises, but the writing is eloquent and beautiful. It flowed so well that it makes you want to read more. Honey Chasers has been responsible for several late nights, when I thought I would read for a short time, but found myself so engrossed in the story that I read on for hours. Ms. Simone, a freelance writer, who has written for our magazine before, has penned a book which truly shows how deep her talents go. The Honey Chaser involves Simone’s main character Sheila Washington who is being chased by three men: the ghost of a deceased sweetheart, his murderer, and a new lover. She fears the threats made to her by Rick’s murderer and feels she cannot possibly live a normal life. After several years of therapy Sheila finds herself more comfortable without planting roots anywhere. She feels safer being on the move, and travels from city to city, living like a vagabond. It is the unexpected romance of Darren Abruzzo, a suave ItalianFilipino attorney, who makes her life take a turn. After spending so much time alone and on the run, she finds she cannot resist the advances of Darren. Darren is captivated by her beauty. She’s an alluring puzzle he must seduce and Sheila soon discovers the multi-lingual attorney’s talent with his tongue isn’t limited to romance languages. After three romantic days in Darren’s arms, Sheila resumes her plans and heads from Albuquerque to San Diego. Darren is determined to not only get her back to Albuquerque, but to win her guarded heart. She does end up falling for him, but is haunted by her past and is in constant danger. Their attempts to reunite and lead a normal life are

met with many obstacles along the way. This writer knows very well how to construct a story to keep her readers on the edge of their seats. If you are looking for a book that you won’t be able to put down and whose characters you will become so vested in that you will miss them when the story ends, be sure to pick up a copy of Honey Chaser,

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Readers can order Honey Chaser from www.zorisimone.com. The coupon code: XD44XTYL is valid for the paperback Short Sales version, only on the author's website.

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Meet Me Under the Eiffel Tower Author: Tasha Donahue

Tasha Donahue was running away from home. Tasha wasn’t the first one to do so, but at the age of 63, it was, to say the least, unusual. Life had been difficult. Tasha hadn’t seen a ballet, listened to a concert, danced, or enjoyed a museum in way too long. She

be best friend…Craigslist. It would be this medium which would lead to some wonderful adventures, embarrassing escapades and truly memorable encounters with the parade of friends she met during her sabbatical from reality. In Meet Me Under The Eiffel Tower, Tasha enchants us with the stories of the men who came in and out of her life. Some of her suitors had but one thing on their mind, but the majority of those she met simply wanted to share an evening with an attractive woman for great conversation and laughter. Only one of those encounters would end up in the bedroom, but the time she shared with many others were in their own way as erotic and memorable.

Meet Me Under the Eiffel Tower

had been out of the dating scene for over three years. So the extreme decision to run away became the only answer, if she was to get back her zest for live.

Thank you Tasha for sharing your story, and giving women everywhere the hope that life doesn’t have to be boring, and age doesn’t determine what you can accomplish. Order your copy today through HYPERLINK "http://www.createspace.com/3895697" www.createspace. com/3895697 . Also available at Kindle, Amazon and expanded distribution sites

Some people might choose a weekend away at a spa or mountain retreat, and then back to the realities of life, for Tasha she needed more than that. She was escaping to the beautiful city of Paris, not for a three day weekend, but for six months.

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Paris was not a new location for Tasha, she had been there 7 times before and she knew it would be the answer to her problems. Her plan was to focus on a rejuvenation of her senses. Her plan included enjoying concerts, museums, good food and new friends, and if a few new sexy men wandered into her life, who was she to object?

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After six months, Tasha returned to the States to resume her “normal” life. Though this wasn’t truly what happened. The time spent in Paris had changed her for the better. As Tasha admits at the end of her story, “Adventure is not going to knock on my door, but I can knock on the door of adventure! I went to Paris for me. I had to leave my reality to find myself. I put everyone else’s problems to the wayside and concentrated unabashedly on moi. Perhaps, you can do that from your back porch, or with a new career, hobby or a get-away weekend. You may find your Paris within (it costs much less, too!)”

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In this truthful and unabashed account Tasha shares the honest experiences that she faced as a woman alone in Paris. Her honesty is refreshing and her experiences keep you turning the pages. This is a book to lay back and savor, since once started it is hard to put down. It touches upon the true fact that age is often not a factor when it comes to living out your dreams and taking the time to put yourself first. Tasha is gracious enough to share her life with us through this amazingly poignant book.

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Are You a Giraffe? How Women Recover From Being Raised by a Narcissistic Mother

Kathryn Rudlin, LCSW, a giraffe, is available for counseling and consultation to daughters of narcissistic mothers and mental health professionals, email her at: knownarcs@att.net. Resources to learn more about maternal narcissism:

Recently 100 women from around the world convened at a conference in the Rocky Mountains with an agenda rarely discussed in our society. Each woman came to learn, share experiences and ultimately find ways to heal from a uniquely painful past. Everyone at this conference had a common bond, that of growing up with a mother whose psychological issues made it difficult for her to raise, love or connect with her children - a particularly poignant situation for daughters.

ONLINE:

Dr. Karyl McBride, a psychologist who lives and works in Denver, facilitated the conference based on personal, professional and research experience that led her to write: Will I Ever Be Good Enough? Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers, a book that resonated with daughters who previously felt alone in their struggle. Dr. McBride defines narcissistic mothers as having problems that vary in severity, but usually having these characteristics in common:

BOOKS:

• Self-absorbed, the world revolves around her. • Unable to feel empathy for others. • Out of touch with her emotions, except anger. • Manipulative and controlling to get her needs met. • Overly concerned with looking good to others. • Difficulty seeing her daughter as a separate person.

www. Know-Narcs.com www. Meetup.com/Daughters-of-Narcissistic-Mothers “DONM” – Southern California www.willieverbegoodenough.com

Will I Ever Be Good Enough? Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers, by Karyl McBride, Ph.D. Why Is It Always About You? Saving Yourself From the Narcissists in Your Life, by Sandy Hotchkiss, LCSW Children of the Self-Absorbed - A Grownup’s Guide to Getting Over Narcissistic Parents, by Nina W. Brown, Ed.D., L.P.C.

Many women are impacted by a mother with these traits, but only some decide to explore this situation further in order to enhance their lives and ensure this legacy doesn’t continue and negatively impact their children. Dr. McBride describes these women as “giraffes,” elegant creatures able to see the fake happy-family scenario the narcissist tries to create. Unfortunately, many women with this giraffe perspective are labeled as the ‘black sheep’ of their families due to seeing the problems as they really are. Although the popular portrayal of a narcissist is someone with a huge ego, behind closed doors the reality for women with this issue is often impaired self-esteem, significant shame, emotional immaturity and a reliance on others for validation. Several years ago, noted psychologist Martha Beck wrote in her column in O Magazine that one of the best ways to end the power struggle with a narcissist is “to let go of the rope,” that is, to stop engaging in a frustrating, futile and often emotionally abusive relationship. In Denver we learned not only how to let go, but also how to get the nurturing and affirmation we never received from our self-absorbed and emotionally impaired mothers. We learned how to heal and view ourselves as “eternally good enough” as we explored Dr. McBride’s 5-step recovery model which includes grieving for the mother we never had, accepting her limitations and learning to rid ourselves of her critical messages. When the 3-day conference came to an end, we no longer felt like victims of this narcissistic legacy, we felt like strong, empowered women. If this is a scenario that is familiar to you, consider becoming a giraffe - stand tall and decide to get past the legacy of a painful past. Healing from a narcissistic mother is a challenging journey that is well worth the effort, and there is plenty of support to do so: check out Dr. McBride’s website for information on the 2012 conference, join a support group with others who ‘get it,’ or work with a therapist who understands these dynamics and can help you through the recovery process.

JULY 29–30TH

FESTIVAL WILL BE HELD AT:

PROSPECT STREET THE MUSEUM OF 700 LA JOLLA, CA 92037 CONTEMPORARY WWW.LJFFF.COM ART IN LA JOLLA


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San Diego

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Forgiveness By Josée D’Amore

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Forgiveness is, I believe, greatly misunderstood. Since we don’t understand it, we reject it. Our society has twisted it into an unattractive form. In fact, often times our first introduction goes something like this: as a child our parents force us to say that we are sorry to our friend for a wrong-doing and the other child’s parents force their child to accept the apology. These are good intentions on the part of parents. After all, how else do they teach these valuable lessons to their children? Nevertheless, the child's words are usually said reluctantly and are more of a statement of resignation than anything else. It doesn’t feel good as a child to apologize and none of us are

too eager to duplicate the experience in our adult lives. But that picture is not a true representation of what forgiveness really is. I wrestled with forgiveness for two long depressing years after I recalled memories I had long since suppressed: memories of my Dad sexually abusing me, getting me pregnant and my Mom bringing me for an abortion. Let me assure you, forgiveness was not my desire. In fact, I refused to forgive thinking “Why should I have to forgive him?” “If I forgive him, that's letting him off the hook, isn't it?” “He doesn't deserve to be forgiven.” “Doesn't forgiveness mean I have to trust that person again?” “I don't feel like forgiving him.” After resisting it for two years, I realized I wasn’t getting any better. I was still hurting, still wounded, still broken. I wanted to move on. I was tired of being in that place. So, in a final desperate moment, I made a decision to dive into this concept of forgiveness until I really understood what it meant. As I studied it and wrestled with it, what I discovered was stunning. I was unprepared to learn that forgiveness is actually a gift to the one who is hurting. That’s right: it’s a gift for you! Hard to imagine? I understand. It was unfathomable to me as well. For me, forgiveness was the exit sign out of my misery and pain. It was a choice, one that I made every day at first and often numerous times throughout one day. It was a choice accompanied by tears, pain, discomfort and anguish. I made a commitment to this process and I was determined to see it through to the end. I am so very glad I did. As I walked this path, I began to heal. As I healed freedom started to form in my life. Relationships improved, my ability to function in life increased, my outlook in life was positive and there was even a joy that took up residence in my soul. The bitterness, betrayal, anger, sense of abandonment and the depression evaporated as I continued to take on the attitude of forgiveness. Even in my choice to forgive my Dad I wasn’t able to have a relationship with him, since he took no responsibility for his actions. In that, I learned that forgiveness does not depend on the other person’s response, it is proven within the genuineness of my own heart. In order to walk in forgiveness, I didn’t have to allow him in my life again, for forgiveness and trust are two very different things. Forgiveness is a gift to the one who is hurting and trust is something that is proven within the character of the other person. My Dad was not safe to have a relationship with. Those who have proven themselves to be unsafe are not worthy of trust. My journey with forgiveness has been paved with gems of hope and profound revelation. It changed me completely. I wouldn’t trade it for anything; not even a life free from abuse. When the beauty of the gift of forgiveness becomes apparent it is compelling. I have found nothing else that offers freedom to the soul like forgiveness does. It is complete in its work and it transforms you into who you were meant to be. To order a copy of Josée's book The Soul's Take, in either ebook or hard copy, visit http://everything4youstore.com/how_ to___?b=1 or at http://store.payloadz.com/go/?id=1016340 or http://dailydisciplesstore.com/books


Your Partner in Caring. LightBridge Hospice provides a full complement of integrative therapies to enhance the quality of life for patients during end-of-life care, including:

Healing Touch™

A certified program using light or near-body touch to clear and balance the human energy system to facilitate physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual health.

Supportive Music

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The use of essential oils which is directed by patient need and choice.

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Aromatherapy

Pet Therapy

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Music facilitates physical, cognitive, and emotional quality of life. Interaction with pets may lower blood pressure, ease pain or anxiety, and decrease agitation. What makes our integrative therapies unique: ‹ The level of training for each therapy — our staff and volunteers are trained in a wide variety of therapies. ‹ A full complement of therapies is available to the patient. ‹ Integrative therapies are funded by the LightBridge Hospice Community Foundation through private donors and families of former patients.

For more information on our Integrative Therapies, call 858.458.2992 or visit LightBridgeHospice.com. LightBridge Hospice & Palliative Care has earned The Joint Commission’s Gold Seal of Approval


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Hospice Volunteering By D. Kim, LightBridge Hospice Volunteer/Pre-Med Student

“Too often, we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.” -Leo Buscaglia Life passes us by in a blur, with no signs of slowing down. We are some of the busiest people in the world, having to juggle our careers, families, friends, and personal crises. When do we find time to really contemplate what is truly important in our lives? Hospice is a place where patients and families contemplate what’s really important to them as they come to terms with their mortality. Spending time with family, loved ones and friends becomes of utmost importance. Hospice volunteers are integral in helping patients and their families along in this crucial time; often a challenging yet also very gratifying/rewarding time in their life journey. Volunteers at Lightbridge are a valuable part of an integrated team who care for patients at a critical time in their lives. They give their time, energy, talents and support; and they share these gifts with dignity and grace. Along the way, volunteers realize that they too are the beneficiaries of priceless gifts: friendship, love and joyful moments. A gentle touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or even the smallest act of caring can forever impact the life of the volunteer, as well as the patient. The rewards of hospice volunteering are immeasurable and indescribable. The Hospice Volunteer Association gives an eloquent definition of a hospice volunteer: “Through a compassionate connection with the dying person, their presence often becomes an important element in that person’s final journey -- bearing witness to dying and death.” LightBridge volunteers have the privilege of spending time with a patient in the final days of his or her journey. To be invited to take part in such a personal time of one’s life is a gift of priceless value. Lightbridge’s volunteers are a diverse group of people with a variety of talents, gifts, and passions to offer to our patients. In our ranks, we have retired professionals, teachers, retired miltary, college students, medical professionals, engineers, social workers, chaplains, and much more. Each volunteer brings a unique experience to his or her patient. Often, hospice volunteers become involved in volunteering because they have personally witnessed the care, compassion, and relief other hospice volunteers have offered to family members and

friends. At LightBridge, we offer our patients aromatherapy, Healing Touch, chaplain services, and life review. We also provide a volunteer trained in therapeutic harp and two volunteers who bring their friendly dogs to patients for a joyful dose of pet therapy. Volunteers play a huge part in expanding Lightbridge’s services to provide the best of care to all patients. Just enjoy as our volunteers share the life stories that embody the personal and powerful experience of volunteering at LightBridge! (1) A patient expressed that she wanted to talk to her brother whom she has lost contact with for several years. A Lightbridge volunteer located a private investigator to find her brother and spent several hours on the phone to fulfill her patient’s wish. On her birthday, the patient talked to her long-lost brother on the phone for the first time in many years. The private investigator was so touched by the story that he did not charge for his time. (2) One Lightbridge volunteer is a veteran marine. He spends his time participating in Honor Ceremonies in full dress uniform to show appreciation to our veteran patients. (3) We have a patient who is an avid writer, artist, and creator. He has always dreamed of having a book in the library. One of our volunteers is in the process of entering him in a traveling art show where his work will be displayed across the United States. After the traveling show, his work will be stored in the Brooklyn Art Library, open to the public. Lightbridge volunteers are people with open hearts. Most volunteers give their time to sit by a patient’s bedside and simply give the gift of presence. Patients and families are so grateful to have a companion who can provide so much compassion and care in a difficult time. Volunteers have so many special opportunities to really make a difference in people’s lives. Volunteering for Lightbridge is incredibly beneficial in a unique way for each volunteer. Often, a volunteer grows and matures as a person. A volunteer also can benefit one’s current or future career, improve self-esteem, build life-long relationships, reinforce values, and learn knowledge and skills. Hospice volunteering allows one to be open and love, to grow in compassion and empathy. Never underestimate the effect that volunteering at Lightbridge can have on a single life. The simplest gift – time – is also the most valuable and the impact is profound. The gratitude of the patients and their families is simply enough. What gifts will you bring to our patients? And what gifts are awaiting you? Please contact LightBridge Hospice at (858) 458-2992 or visit our website at www.LightBridgeHospice.com


Cafasso Meatball Company… An Italian Taste Sensation! By Judith A. Habert

design the menu using items not on their regular menu to ensure that your favorite Italian dish is available for your special event.

12075 Carmel Mountain Road San Diego, Ca 92128

Rosemary, the matriarch of the Cafasso family, says it best when she explains that, all their food is "made with Italian love." Don’t miss out on this culinary experience, plan a visit to Cafasso Meatball Company and prepare yourself for an Italian taste sensation.

The local Carmel Mountain Ranch restaurant is not the first for the family whose origins are in Salerno, Italy. Vittorio Cafasso, the patriarch of the family, began his cooking career at his Grandmother’s restaurant in Salerno. Many years later he went on to open his own restaurant; Vittorio’s in Huntington Beach, California. He retired after running this establishment for 30 years. We are now lucky enough to have this local institution, which inspired Vittorio to come out of retirement. He now works side by side with his two daughters and his grandson, 3 generations of Cafassos, working together to bring their delicious family recipes to San Diegans. Anna & Gina Cafasso established CMC in June, 2011. The concept originated when the two sisters decided to leave their corporate jobs, go back to their roots and open a place where they could share family traditions and build new ones. When it comes to meatballs they offer several selections including classic beef, turkey, beef & pork, spicy beef & pork, and beef & bacon. For those with specific dietary requirements, don’t despair, you are not left out, you can indulge in their vegetarian zucchini meatballs or their gluten free variety. Although the name might lead you to believe that Cafassos is only about meatballs, their menu includes pasta, pizza, soups, salads, sandwiches, Panini and specialty Italian delicacies. Don’t even consider leaving without partaking in one of their amazing Tiramisu Cupcakes or a mouthwatering Cannoli. Cafassos also offers catering services, bringing their delicious menu to your next party or special event. With their restaurant background and extensive listing of food possibilities, they will even specially

San Diego

I cannot tell you how delighted I was to come upon The Cafasso Meatball Company. Not only do they defy the norm, they actually do so in the toughest of all ways: Meatballs are almost as sacred to Italians as their children. Even among the same family, there are often debates on who makes the best meatballs. Well, I now have the answer for all of those Italians out there and all those who simply love Italian food, Cafasso Meatball Company. Nestled in Carmel Mountain Ranch San Diego, Cafasso Meatball Company (CMC) is a restaurant you must experience for authentic and delicious Italian fare.

Woman

When you grow up in an Italian household, food is always a major part of your life. There are special recipes handed down from generation to generation which must be followed exactly, or you are denied the right to use those secret recipes ever again. Having said this, you can imagine that going out to eat at an Italian restaurant is rare. Most Italians believe that no one can prepare the food as well as their Grandmas or Moms. So why waste the money?

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Feeding people with a club By Rob Weinberg

As a kid I played a lot of minigolf, where the biggest challenge was avoiding the windmill at the third hole. As an adult I’ve learned there are much bigger challenges, with the seeming hopelessness of homelessness, hunger, and poverty among them. There are times in life when we can’t see the obvious before our eyes – the whole forest through the trees thing. But every once in a great while we successfully connect the dots, and make the long journey within a few minutes from the innocence of mini golf to the crushing pressures of life on the streets. For me the trip from mini golf to helping cure someone’s anguish started in Poway. There I joined forces with the Temple Adat Shalom Men’s Club to turn the temple’s social hall into a short-term solution for a long-term problem. Entitled Mini Golf for Good (www.minigolfforgood.org), this event is based on Adat Shalom’s reform Jewish philosophy that, through acts of Tikkun Olam (Hebrew for "repairing the world"), we can each make life better for everyone. It is for this reason that these community volunteers are creating a 36-hole mini golf course for a day to raise funds, provide Ahavat Ger (“love of the stranger”), and help those who need it most. What’s it all about? This coming September 2nd, from 10am – 10pm, Temple Adat Shalom’s 5,400 square foot social hall will be transformed into 12 hours of fun for area residents…and a source of relief for the forgotten among us. The money raised will help support Interfaith Community Services as they shelter and feed North County’s homeless population. ICS, which is connected to dozens of faith-based organizations throughout San Diego, reminds us that hunger, homelessness, and desperation strikes individuals regardless of their religion, race, or previous social status. As an active member of ICS, Adat Shalom wants to do its part. The temple is simultaneously developing a community garden in collaboration with ICS, again with an eye towards feeding the hungry. A portion of the proceeds will go to support this hope-filled venture as well. The Men’s Club will also get a portion of the proceeds, and their help goes to support the community around them. The holes on this course will be sponsored by area businesses who will all have wonderful opportunities to discuss their products and services, if for no other reason than because they’ll be cus

tomizing their holes to suit the personality of their businesses. Imagine a realtor making you hit your ball around a doll house. How about a banker placing bags of money as obstacles? Or a plumber placing the hole in one in a toilet. It’s easy to see how this quickly becomes fun. And as players line up to play they’ll read brochures, watch videos, and talk to staff about what each sponsor potentially offers them. Why you’ll go My participation in this event naturally gives me a bias, but it sure sounds like a pleasant way to help a lot of people. But if altruism isn’t your thing, what about wholesome fun with your family? We’re talking about eight solid hours of laughs, friendship, and good times for adults and children alike. Naturally the event will also have the requisite food, drinks, and silent auction items you would expect. Still not enough? Then check things out from 6-10 pm when it’s adults only and alcohol is available. Regardless of which shift you come for - whether you’re there for an hour, or the day - with two customized 18-hole courses (and discounted replays), you’re certain to have an enjoyable time. The bottom line The Regional Task Force on the Homeless says our area’s homeless population now stands at approximately 9,800, up 8.6% over 2011. Thanks to a little imagination and a lot of hard work by our friends at Temple Adat Shalom, you can help improve dozens of those lives for about the cost of going to the movies. And if THAT isn’t a great way to spend a Sunday, I can’t think of anything that is.

Rancho Bernardo Sunrise Rotary Rancho Bernardo Sunrise Rotary meets for breakfast every Tuesday 7-8:30am at the Country Club of Rancho Bernardo, 12280 Greens East Rd. San Diego, CA 92128 (next to Rancho Bernardo Inn). The Club is involved in local community and international projects. For more information call Karen Mortimer, Membership Chairman at 858-204-2292 or email at Karen.Mortimer@yahoo.com

www.rbsunrise.org


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San Diego

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San Diego Woman BFF Issue 2012