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‘PERFECT’ G IR L TOR M E N TS WORLD WI T H OPEN I NG OF BOX Pandora, the   first   woman— mastered   by   Gods   of   all   kinds— found   herself   in   a   predicament  earlier   this   week.     She   was   a  creation   of   many   Gods.     Zeus  bestowed   the   task   upon   many  Gods   to   design   this   unworldly  woman: Hephaestus—the god of  smiths—to   create   a   beautiful  woman   made   of   water   and  earth;   Aphrodite,   the   flawless  goddess   of   Love,   was   told   to  model her body and her features  to make sure this new woman was  indeed   perfect;   the   Four   Winds  blew   their   breathe   on   her   and  brought   to   her,  life.     Charming,  she was made to  be.     She   was   to  bring   mischief  and   misery   to  mankind.     A  reliable   source  Hermes, the tells   us   that  Messenger “Aphrodite  God adorned her with  beauty,   grace   and   desire;  Hermes,   the   Messenger   god,  gave  her  cunning  and   boldness;  Demeter showed her how to tend  a   garden;   Athena   taught   her  manual   dexterity   and   to   spin;  Apollo taught her to sing sweetly  and play the lyre; Poseidon's gift 

The Golden Box found at the scene of crime

was a   pearl   necklace   and   the  god of the sea promised her that  she would never drown” (Thanasis  1).   Foolishness, mischievous, and  idleness haunted Pandora.  She is  woman­­a human one.   She was  indeed lovely, but these flaws that  were  bestowed  upon  her   vested  to be a problem in the long run. Her creation was a gift from Zeus  to   Epimetheus.     His   brother,  Prometheus,   had   enraged   Zeus  by unleashing the secret to fire to  the   human   race.     Nevertheless,  Zeus   gave   Pandora   to  Epimetheus  to have and to  hold  as   a   wife.     Before   Pandora   was  released   to   the   earth   for   him   to  have, a ceremony was held with  all   of   the   Gods.   There,   Pandora  was given a box from Hermes, the  messenger   god,   with   lavish  pictures and decorations all over  it.     A   warning   came   with   this  beautiful   gift:   she   must   NEVER  open the box! In the past few days, all Hell has  been broken out  on   earth.     With  the   opening   of  this   box,   she  unleashed   this  horrid   curse,   this  Depiction of Pandora opening the Golden Box

thing that   seems   to   be   the   utter  demise   of   mankind.     Pandora  opened   this   beautiful   box,   not  thinking   of   the   consequences.  She was not told what lay inside  the   mighty   walls   of   this   small  prison­­just   to   not   open   it.     We  know that she did in the secret of  her   own  house  because  earth   is 

going berserk!     To   the   left   is   a  depiction   of   what   investigators  believe Pandora looked like while  opening   the   box.     Curiosity   got  the best of her.  And now, she will  always   be   remembered   as   the  woman who set forth nastiness on  the earth.

Buy her pearls and you have the guarantee of NEVER drowning! Beauty is associated with these fine gemstones This string of pearls’ lifetime is never ending Your intelligence level will increase dramatically Your creative juices will be flowing If you buy these Pearls, Pandora's exquisite, elegant, magnificent Pearls you wil

D o you ever feel clumsy or out of place? Well tr y this br acelet today! The bracelet helps you stay balanced If  you  wear  the  bracelet  it  immediately  takes  effect  It is for BOTH men and women It  not  only  helps  with  your  balance  but  your  gracefulness. Why be clumsy when you could be graceful? 

Juicestafer Juice

D r ink this Juicestafer Juice and hear w hat happens!! You will have the voice of an angel Singing will come naturally While  singing  you  will  be  able  to  hit  notes  of  any  range Your voice will stay beautiful forever It is a great fix for manly women that want to sound  more like a woman If  you  try  Juicestafer  Juice  today  it  will  take  effect  within  30  minutes!  The  voice  of  an angel is  only 30  minutes  away!  But  it  today  and  your  life  will  be  changed forever more!

Dear Aphrodite,  Last week I lost my husband to Shingles. I am so  upset!!! I wish I knew how to keep my life moving even  though he is now gone. I have four kids to take care of.   They need me; they need their mother.  What should I  do?? Sincerely, A Concerned Human Reader

Dear Concerned Human Reader, This is fate.  Everything happens for a reason.   Maybe you and him… you both were just not meant to  be.  You may not want to be reading this right now, but  it’s the truth.  Things will be hard; you’re going to have to  work hard for what you want.  You must get what you  deserve—nothing more, nothing less.  I wish you the best  of luck in your endeavors of life and wherever this life  takes you. Always, Aphrodite


Pandora's Box is awesome because we made this.