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San Antonio’s most collegiate newspaper • August 24-30, 2011 • sacurrent.com

COLLEGE GUIDE FEATURING

1 OP, H S , K N I R D TO E ER H W ALSO: OK, so it’s not quite 1,000 things ... we rounded up. But trust us — it is A LOT of things.

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sacurrent.com | August 24-30, 2011 | CURRENT 1


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EDITORIAL Art Director: Chuck Kerr Music & Film Editor: Enrique Lopetegui Calendar Editor: Bryan Rindfuss Copy Editor: Nicole Chavez Web Editor: Jaime Monzon Staff Writer: Michael Barajas Arts Writer: Scott Andrews Contributing Photographers: Steven Gilmore, Josh Huskin Contributing Writers: Debby Andersen, Ron Bechtol, James Bosquez, Tony Cantú, Laura Carter, Elizabeth Chavez, Natalia Ciolko, Adam Coronado, Robert Crowe, DeAnne Cuellar, Christine Garza, Rudy Gayby, Lance Hendrickson, Justin Isenhart, Thomas Jenkins, Mark Jones, Steven G. Kellman, Ashley Lindstrom, Lauren W. Madrid, Kiko Martinez, Travis Poling, Manuel Solis, Brian Villalobos, Jay Whitecotton Editorial Interns: Molly Austad, Brittany Dunne, Ashley Feinberg, David Monnich, Luz Moreno, Collette Orquiz, Madeline Rau, Michelle Ybarra ADVERTISING Advertising Director: Lara Fischer (x105) Account Manager: Chelsea Bourque (x123) Account Executives: Carlos Aguirre (x117), Oscar Peña (x119) CLASSIFIED ADVERTISING Classified Sales Manager: Jennifer Sanders (x116) Classified Account Executive: Johnny Deosdade (x114) PRODUCTION Production Manager: Julian Cordero Production Designer: Jay Reyna Production Intern: April Fairchild CIRCULATION Circulation Director: Mark VanHudson (x121) Distribution: Juanita Alpizar, Oscar Alpizar, Sergio Alpizar, Pam Clepper, Janice Farnell, Gabriella Gutierrez, Jeff Miller, Carolina Ramos, Charles Tiller BUSINESS Business Manager: Elizabeth Hubbard Office Assistant: Katelynn Mueller National Advertising: Voice Media Group 1-888-278-9866, voicemediagroup.com

Contents August 24-30, 2011

Do This Now: Things you really need to do before you leave college / Page 7 Transitional Reading: A recent grad’s recommendations for novel takes on growing up / 13 Jobs that Pay: Health care and oilfield jobs driving much of today’s demand / 19 Drink Specials: Lubricating banter on the cheap / 21 Security Issues: Ways to stay safe (and keep from getting busted) / 22

Times-Shamrock Group Publisher: Jennifer Marsh Copyright 2011, San Antonio Current Co. all rights reserved. San Antonio Current Co. is a wholly owned subsidiary of TimesShamrock Communications. Reproduction in whole or in part without permission of the publisher is prohibited. Publisher does not assume liability for unsolicited manuscripts or materials, which must be accompanied by a stamped, self-addressed envelope to be returned. All editorial, advertising, and business correspondence should be sent to the address listed below. Printed in the U.S.A. Distribution: The San Antonio Current is available free of charge, limited to one copy per reader. Prior written permission must be granted by the San Antonio Current for additional copies. The San Antonio Current may be distributed only by its authorized distributors and independent contractors. Additional copies or back issues may be purchased at the Current offices for $1. Six-month domestic subscriptions may be purchased for $50; one-year subscriptions for $100. San Antonio Current 915 Dallas St. San Antonio, Texas 78215 Editorial: (210) 227-0044 / Fax: (210) 227-6611 Display Advertising: (210) 227-0044 / Fax: (210) 227-7733 Classified: (210) 227-CLAS / Fax: (210) 227-7755 Get listed: Send us your complete info two weeks before publication. For complete submission guidelines, visit www. sacurrent.com. E-mail: sacalendar@sacurrent.com; Mail: Calendar Editor, same address as above; Fax: (210) 227-6611. Listing submissions aren’t accepted by phone.

Paying Dues: Today’s economy makes internships a must / 27 Discount Dating: Colorful, romantic, affordable San Anto destinations / 28 Worst College Jobs: Pretty self-explanatory / 31 Fashion Hunt: Scoring great finds takes patience, planning / 33

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Hair Care 101: Inexpensive back-to-school options / 35 Big Three: Answering tough questions freshmen dread asking / 36 Credit Hassles: Maintaining a good credit rating starts now / 43 Contributor Bios / 44 LET’S BE FRIENDS!

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sacurrent.com | August 24-30, 2011 | CURRENT 5


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6 CURRENT | August 24-30, 2011 | sacurrent.com


COLLEGE GUIDE 2011

DO THIS NOW! Photo illustrations by Chuck Kerr

Things you really need to do before you leave college

n this narrow window of time between being someone’s child and being your own boss (or, more likely, a paycheck-dependent peon to some guy in a dark suit), there is a time made for experimentation called college life. You’re away from home for possibly the first time in your life, you’re surrounded by tons of cool folks with common interests, and the world, seemingly, is at your doorstep. The San Antonio Current and our sister paper, the Detroit Metro Times, asked our Facebook friends what every college student should try at least once before leaving school. Here’s what the Times staff and our collective online families came up with. — Greg Harman

I

PRANKS When we g Wh graduate from college, we’re supposed to be sober, serious adults. So what better excuse to release a painted pig in a building? Or to put 100 pink flamingos on the Dean’s lawn? Be creative, and remember: Don’t get caught.

START THE NEXT CAMPUS CRAZE Our post-collegiate research department identifies goldfish swallowing in the 1930s (210 is claimed as a record), panty raids and phonebooth stuffing in the 1950s, piano-smashing in the 1960s, and streaking in the 1970s. There the fad tradition pretty much dies. But you, dear collegiate reader, can revive it.

ORGANIZE A FLASH MOB But make it a flash mob for good, not evil.

POSTERS This is the last time in your life when you can put posters on the wall without being accused of regressing. We suggest something tasteful, such as W.C. Fields or some symphony in blacklight from a resale shop.

GO VEGETARIAN/VEGAN Not only can you enjoy all the college-age self-righteousness of a vegan diet, it dovetails neatly with the “picky eater” phase you don’t want to age out of quite yet. Note that limited income often creates the hybrid McVegetarian who subsists on ramen and fishwiches.

EXPERIENCE THE DORM CAFETERIA Including on “mystery meat” day. Unless you’re following the advice above.

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COLLEGE GUIDE 2011

◄ DO THIS NOW, 7

ROAD TRIP N Normally, Normally ll thi this means getting in your friends’ worst, smallest car, packing it to the gills with things you will not need, and then breaking down on the highway just far enough from home to necessitate calling Mom and Dad for a wire from Western Union.

DECLARE YOUR INDEPENDENCE For the majority of college students, you are still reliant upon Mom and Dad for almost everything: tuition, books, clothing, food budget, credit cards, pocket money, meals when they roll into town (or on trips back home). But don’t let reality stand in the way of a pose of absolute independence. Practice phrases such as, “I am my own master,” and “Honey Badger don’t care.” Repeat as necessary until everyone believes you — and you almost believe yourself.

SEXUAL EXPERIMENTS Probably 90 percent of the guys who “come out” in college are going to be gay for the rest of their lives. It’s a little trickier with the girls, hence the slang term “LUG” (lesbian until graduation). Our Facebook friends left us advice including the following: “Group sex. Lol”

8 CURRENT | August 24-30, 2011 | sacurrent.com

“Have causal sex in the parking lot (preferably in a car) after an evening class!” “Menage a trois, or orgy.”

BECOME INSANELY POLITICAL Whether you’re left-wing or right-wing, or just want to pick some pet issue to be fanatical about (animals, fur, green energy), this is the time to carry a placard and protest injustices.

PROTEST SOMETHING “For a lot of people, the college experience will present at least one opportunity to organize, gather, and protest the hell out of something,” offered reader Bob Wilkins. Protest subjects may include: “student pay, tuition, cafeteria food quality, the firing of some radical yet radically popular prof ... ”

ADD JAIL TO YOUR RESUME “It’s probably the one time you could get arrested and put it in your resume,” Wilkins continued. “For instance, you’re applying for a writing job on the Daily Show : ‘Yes, sir, when I was 20 I was arrested on campus while protesting the G8 Conference ... and/or the next year protesting Big Pharma .... and my senior year


COLLEGE GUIDE 2011 I organized and led a March against the latest reauthorization of the Patriot Act.’”

FIND A MENTOR You need “that one professor you keep up with after college that you know you can always get advice from.”

FIND A ROLE MODEL One Facebook friend opined that you should “Find a professor who is a shining example of how you can defy the odds with hard work. My sociology teacher at university was born blind.”

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years. Maybe you’ll hear “pretty good poem for a junior high student.” But not for long after. Junior year is probably the last time you’ll hear “pretty good” just for finishing your novel.

COMMUNITY SERVICE You’re going to be really busy studying and/or nursing hangovers, but it’s worthwhile to devote some time to helping others. Planting trees or volunteering at the soup kitchen will make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside and it looks really great on your resume. Especially when you weren’t ordered to be a good guy or girl by a judge.

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READ, READ, READ Fall madly in love with a writer who died before your parents were born.

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“Sorry, dad.”

BODY ART T STUDY ABROAD S D You can earn your d degree and develop a de better understanding of other cultures while having international adventures.

LEARN A FOREIGN LANGUAGE Which may help with the above. And vice versa.

TAKE ADVANTAGE OF FREE STUFF OK, so it’s not really free when you think about it. You’re paying tuition to have access to things like a gym, tutoring services, events on campus, etc. You might as well partake and get as much out of the experience as possible. And besides the free stuff, don’t forget to work your student ID for discounts where you can.

WRITE A NOVEL, FAST Garrison Keillor once observed that the older you get, the fewer pats on the back you get for just doing anything. You may hear “Pretty good drawing for an 8-year-old,” but that turn of phrase grows ever-rarer with advancing

Your ffuture Y t professional life will be characterized by slacks in neutral tones and starchy collared shirts, so get some tattoos and/or piercings and show them off before you sign up for a 9-to-5 with a dress code. It’s debatable whether or not a spiky purple mohawk is appropriate in the workplace, but you can most likely get away with it during undergrad. (Reminder: Tattooing spider patterns on your face, love and hate across your knuckles, or the name of this week’s beloved across your neck are a wee bit more serious than “Go Tigers” across an ass cheek.)

DEVELOP A CAFFEINE ADDICTION Inevitably there will be long, lonely, allnight cram sessions followed by 8 a.m. exams and you can be sure that one loyal friend will be there to support you — caffeine.

GET YOURSELF AN INTERNSHIP Muster some ambition and apply for an internship. It will probably be a lot of work for literally no money but the job experience is invaluable and you’ll meet people and do things DO THIS NOW, 10 ► sacurrent.com | August 24-30, 2011 | CURRENT 9


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COLLEGE GUIDE 2011 ◄ DO THIS NOW, 9 that could help you on your way to achieving whatever career goals you might have. (Hint: Do not send a cover letter like this one: “As an inspiring journalist, I would love to be able to work, learn, and corporate with the San Antonio Current. … )

TAKE A RANDOM CLASS Yes, college is about getting a degree and ultimately landing a job, but there’s a crazy rumor going around that it’s also meant to be a time of personal development. When your schedule allows, don’t be afraid to take a class in something that interests you. Though it may seem superfluous, “Study of Harry Potter” will probably prove to be more fun and memorable than Chem102. (Unless you’re already a popular culture major, in which case, go for the Chem.) As one Facebooker added on this popular piece of advice: “You’ll learn to respect people with different skills.”

TAKE A DRAMA CLASS IF YOU’RE A BUSINESS MAJOR

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en appliance is a microwave. But take heed, the freshman 15 is no myth. Vending machine cheese doodles will conspire against your buns and thighs. Hit the on-campus gym every once in awhile and do what you can to stay healthy.

KEEP IN TOUCH WITH THE FOLKS Now that you’re out from under their parental yoke, admit it; you sort of miss the ’rents. Take a minute to call and check in with them and mom will be so happy she’ll get all misty-eyed.

DRUGS College is this weird time and place where lots of things are inexplicably socially acceptable that usually wouldn’t be. We’re just saying … if you experimented with some psychedelics or something, we wouldn’t hold it against you. Some Facebook friends suggested specific inebriants, including psilocybin mushrooms and marijuana.

Continuing on the theme above, we’ve heard the suggestion that an acting class gives the aspiring business wizard an advantage over the drones who’ve focused solely on ROI and Ponzi schemes … oops, we mean cutting edge financial instruments. Remember, sincerity is the most important thing in the world. Once you can fake it, you’ve got it made.

TRY NOT TO GET FAT T Granted, it’s difficult Granted difficult to conjure conju up a nutritious meal when your most sophisticated kitch-

DON’T BE FRIVOLOUS D S

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10 CURRENT | August 24-30, 2011 | sacurrent.com

Regarding the drug stuff stuff, and sex stuff, and some of the other advice here, Facebook respondent Moor Phe Us ranted: Join a fraternity; a menage a trois; an orgy?! … Frivolous nonsense. And you wonder why the world is a hell! The reason the New World Order cabal can even exist is because people are stupid! They’re so busy skipping class to engage in public drunkenness; or swallowing goldfish or having wanton uncontrollable sexual encounters to even notice that they’re being victimized. … I don’t know about any of you, but my college education was far too expensive to waste it doing any of the nonsense you all are talking about. There is a time and a place


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to have fun, and then thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s school. School by design has always been to uplift and elevate â&#x20AC;&#x201D; which is the reason the aristocratic elite sought to deprive the every day people of it for so long. And here we have the opportunity to partake of it, and this is what you all come me up with. Sex and drinking! You all deserve rve whatever fate awaits you.

CREATE C If youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve â&#x20AC;&#x2122; a always had an interest in crafting, photography, music, or anything else of the creative ilk, this is a great time to try it out. Odds are there will be people around who share your interest and will be able to help or encourage you. More and more college students supplement a meager income by making and selling things on sites like etsy.com.

JOIN A CLUB Most schools have something for everyone. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a great way to meet people and itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll be comforting to know that others share your nerd passion for anime, squirrel-watching, intramural ping-pong, or the kind of creative endeavors suggested in the prior item. Clubs are also a way to learn about working in groups and taking a leadership role. (Yes, playing well

with others does serve you later in life.) Be the president of something.

NETWORK Because years from now you might walk into a job interview and find yourself sitting across from that guy who always wore socks with sandals in your psychology class.

FIND YOUR BFFS Not exactly the same as the above. Make sure you know the difference.

JOIN A SORORITY OR FRATERNITY Well, not that we did. But theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re networking taken to the nth degree. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Even if you donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t get in at least it is a fun experience to try,â&#x20AC;? a Facebook friend advised. Depends on your idea of fun. Another suggestion: â&#x20AC;&#x153;a few frat parties for the free beer and complete craziness.â&#x20AC;?

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GET A JOB â&#x20AC;&#x153;Even if itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s only for the few weeks and the employee discount.â&#x20AC;? (And if itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s only for that, you can give the check to charity or your more DO THIS NOW, 39 â&#x2013;ş sacurrent.com | August 24-30, 2011 | CURRENT 11


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12 CURRENT | August 24-30, 2011 | sacurrent.com


COLLEGE GUIDE 2011

TRANSITIONAL READING

One grad recommends novel takes on growing up //// BY AARON MONDRY

“Adult” and “youth” are nebulous terms. The transition between the two is as well. We’ve all known adults who act like children or children who are wise beyond their years. Are there some criteria for adulthood? Does it become official when we reach a certain age? In Judaism, that age is 13. But I know my parents, for all their talk about “becoming a man,” didn’t give me all the freedoms of an adult after my Bar Mitzvah. Independence certainly is an important feature of the transition. Not just financial or spatial independence, but of the mind as well. Accepting responsibility, making decisions that impact others. This heady stage in development is a great one for writers, combining worldliness and impulsiveness. Good books are largely about transformative change and the realization of undiscovered truths. We sometimes call this “growing up.” For a lot of people, this period occurs around college. That’s mostly true for me. I think it could be useful to arm yourself with books that speak to this stage. Not to be prepared per se, but to help with thinking through these issues. Most of these stories take place outside the university, but this makes sense since life provides much more useful lessons than textbooks.

THE TIN DRUM BY GÜNTER GRASS Growth, or lack thereof, is the prominent theme in this bizarre tale. The setting is the town of Danzig, Germany, in and around World War II. When, at the age of 1, Oskar Matzerath overhears his father’s dream of having the boy take over the family business, he decides to not grow up. Instead, Oskar maintains the appearance and outward mannerisms of a 3-year-old. While everyone in Danzig thinks him to be an unfortunate oddity, he secretly finds ways to infiltrate the adult world through his glass-breaking voice and virtuoso capabilities on the snare drum (he can imitate sounds such as rain, or bring forth long-forgotten memories). Forget all the talk about lessons for a sec. This is one of the richest books I’ve ever read and worth reading for its sheer creative power. But if you must learn something, Grass’ clever adult-stays-young inversion of the typical coming of age story says a lot about lost childhood. Ultimately, Oskar is brilliant but socially stunted (the ever-present growth metaphor).

KAFKA ON THE SHORE BY HARUKI MURAKAMI I read this book by Japaneseborn, West-obsessed Murakami as I flew back to America after two years in Japan. I don’t know what this reading-and-travel order means, but it seemed significant. And so did this book. But that’s probably because I was thinking a lot about personal change on the flight back. And so is the narrator Kafka. This preternaturally mature 15-year-old is running away from his unloving father in search of his mother and sister and … something else. Like all Murakami, this is of the “magic realism” genre. There’s a man who talks to cats, a shape-shiftting figure who takes the form of product mascots, and an alternate reality where lost souls rest. Highly introspective, funny at times, m creative, this is truly a book for th the college-bound, becoming-self-aware aw crowd.

THE SOT-WEED FACTOR BY JOHN BARTH Mirth, bawd, and philosophie describe this post-modern yarn set in colonial times. Ebenezer Cooke, a home-schooled youth from England, sets sail to become the poet laure-

ate of Maryland. Despite dogged attempts to preserve his purity and innocence through pen and wit, Ebenezer is abused throughout Sot-Weed and constantly reminded of the perfidious truth about human nature. Barth constructed a brilliant plot that has a laugh a page. Its recreation of the vocabulary and cadences of the time is quite impressive. Best of all is the way naïve Ebenezer is thrown into ribald, smutty America and the hilarious situations which ensue. It will open the eyes of the optimist and entertain the pessimist.

EMPIRE OF THE SUN BY J.G. BALLARD Many of the books on this list are about youths who must grow up prematurely and unexpectedly — and none more so than this one. Ballard witnessed some true horrors as a youth and put off novelizing it until he was in his 50s. After reading about Jim Graham’s fight for survival in Japanese-occupied Shanghai, one can see why. There’s very little ambiguity in this semi-autobiographical book, no large realization at the novel’s end. The reader must reconcile everything Jim has witnessed and done, for the boy doesn’t yet have the capacity. The adult characters are disturbed by the way Jim admires the Japanese and fantasizes about

being a fighter pilot as if he’s enjoying himself at times. They are old enough to realize what an impressionistic youth might grow into amid such destruction and cruelty. The real Ballard became a genius author of unforgiving stories showcasing the violent side of humanity. (But, hey, he could have turned out worse.) This story puts his entire literary career into perspective.

PLEASE KILL ME BY LEGS MCNEIL AND GILLIAN MCCAIN College is largely about partying, right? Not like these people. This book, the only nonfiction offering on the list, is an oral history of punk rock. Rock has always been rebellious music steeped in sex and drugs. But punk rock, a genre pioneered by youth, took that decadence to a new extreme. Open it to any page and you’re sure to be entertained, inspired, and perhaps warned by these musicians’ behavior. I like to have this book near my bedside (or, appropriately, the shitter) for quick snippets of insanity. A lot of it takes place in Detroit and Ann Arbor, home of such proto-punk figureheads as Iggy Pop, Wayne Kramer, and John Sinclair.

READING, 14 ►

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COLLEGE GUIDE 2011 ◄ READING, 13

THE ADVENTURES OF AUGIE MARCH BY SAUL BELLOW Augie March typifies the precocious youth character. Growing up fatherless in Chicago during the Great Depression, Augie must scrape out a living using his above-average intellect. This street education suffices though his life remains entertainingly turbulent, perhaps because of his lack of mooring and formal education. The reader follows Augie through his most formative years, and the story takes a number of drastic twists. Augie begins impoverished, then befriends a rich family and glimpses aristocratic life. There is a lengthy side-adventure in Mexico involving eagle training. Depending on your personality, Augie’s adventures might be cautionary, or the catalyst to your own.

WHITE NOISE BY DON DELILLO College professors have anxieties, doubts, and faults sometimes far exceeding us lessknowledgeable types. Jack Gladney started his own Department of Hitler studies in the fictional and isolated college town of Blacksmith. He often has no clue what he’s doing, though he’s really good at making people think he does — an invaluable skill for “experts.” I think this book does a lot of good at clearing the obfuscation that often exists in academia. Gladney is the so-called foremost Hitler scholar in the country, yet hardly knows any German. He’ll authoritatively make a point during a class discussion, then wonder why he said it and what it means. His family is a confused mess of ex-wives and stepchildren. Read it and you’ll be less willing to swallow everything professors force-feed you.

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COLLEGE GUIDE 2011

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16 CURRENT | August 24-30, 2011 | sacurrent.com

re you a social pariah? Suffering from shitty grades? Frequently spotted staggering around campus like a sleepless zombie? Well donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t feel too worthless if you answered yes to any of these â&#x20AC;&#x201D; the collegelife trifecta is considered unattainable by many. Even if itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s too late to save myself, Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve learned some lessons that may help you achieve a fuller and richer college experience. To begin, letâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s talk about that classic collegiate fallback known as the cram session. With years of first-hand procrastination experience under my belt, I have three words about cramming: DONâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;T DO IT. Though itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s as common as split ends, what most students donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t talk about is the misery waiting at the other side of a 24-hour Adderall and energy-drink binge. If itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not specifically prescribed for you, the Adderall pains are a no-brainer. And while energy drinks do provide a short burst of energy while studying, the outrageous amount of caffeine and sugar in them will only make you feel even more tired later on. I cannot tell you how many times Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve stumbled into an exam, bleary-eyed and bitchy beyond what really should be considered legal only to find some over-eager classmate in a sweaty panic, worrying that the last 10 consecutive days of studying hadnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t prepared them sufficiently. In the end, guess which one of us was more likely to blank out after receiving the exam. Procrastination is the enemy; it is a butcher of good grades and all-important sleep. With the constant thrum of social activities on campus, the excitement can easily lead students to stray from their studies. Next to setting a schedule, one of my secret weapons for overcoming procrastination disorder is SelfControl. This application is the bomb. Though only available for Macs, it basically blocks access to any websites you choose â&#x20AC;&#x201D; thinking Facebook, Gmail, Tumblr â&#x20AC;&#x201D; for a predetermined period of time while allowing you to access the rest of the web. Another trick involves giving yourself incentives for getting your work done early. If you get all your work done in advance, reward yourself with a gluttonous feast of the most ass-fattening delicacies you can find. Tell yourself that if you get all your studying out of the way the Friday before a big exam, you can attend every ABC-,

A

Rubikâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Cube-, white trash-, toga-, or mustachethemed party you want that weekend â&#x20AC;&#x201D; or whatever floats your boat. You probably already know whether you are a morning lark or a night owl. By timing your study periods to coincide with your natural circadian rhythm, you can boost your performance. If you have not found your circadian rhythm, Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d advise that you experiment with the time of day you study. Also, learn your study style â&#x20AC;&#x201D; do you like studying in absolute silence, with Deadmau5 blasting into your Bose, or with a group of classmates at Starbucks? You should shape where and when you study around these factors. Another simple fix with a ton of potential is getting to know your professors. Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t misquote me on this â&#x20AC;&#x201D; I am not telling you to be a brownnoser. All Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m saying is, communication with your professor is key. A professor who knows you by name will unquestionably trust you more and this could come in handy in a variety of situations. When it comes to maintaining a blossoming social calendar, force yourself to make a schedule for each upcoming week, even if you arenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t a big planner. Track your academic progress in tandem with the social events you wish to attend, and reward yourself when you have completed all the studying youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d planned at the end of each week. After all, it is easiest to stick with a plan when you can actually see that itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s working. If youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re having trouble balancing your social life in particular, consider joining a social or sports club at your school. These are advantageous because they plan out all social events for you, and you donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t even have to lift a finger. My final word on achieving this collegiate trifecta is to be realistic. Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t get me wrong, studying is hard! It involves intense concentration, dedication of time, and the motivation to succeed. Underestimating the amount of time needed is common. So take a deep breath, donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t get frustrated, and factor in some extra time to allow flexibility in your schedule. Or if youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve read this whole thing and youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re still against my tips on achieving collegiate bliss, you can always flip the equation and go to those parties now, cram for the next two days, and return to the land of the undead.

â&#x20AC;˘


We communicate

with our students via

LET ME PROTECT YOUR

DRIVING RECORD

ACES email

san antonio college Please check

twice a week @

alamo.edu

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St. Philipâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s College is among the oldest and most diverse community colleges in the nation and one of the fastest growing in Texas, a Historically Black College and Hispanic Serving Institution with an enrollment of 11,000 credit students and 8,000 continuing education students. St. Philipâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s College â&#x20AC;&#x201C; meeting the educational needs of San Antonioâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s growing and diverse community through academic courses and technical and career programs.

For more information visit alamo.edu/spc or call (210) 486-2333

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1423 McCullough Ave. San Antonio, TX 78212 18 CURRENT | August 24-30, 2011 | sacurrent.com


COLLEGE GUIDE 2011

JOBS THAT PAY IF YOU WERE SMART,

you’d find yourself a nice spot in your college library’s ventilation system, build yourself a paper nest out of copies of Ayn Rand’s Fountainhead, and hide out till your family declares you dead. With the job market avoided, you’d be free to spend the rest of your days in peace, pilfering Froot Loops late at night from those weird food chutes they have in the cafeteria (what are you, cattle?), and watching all those poor fools march off to the job market. However, there may not be room for all of you up there. Some of you are going to have to brave the world outside. Thankfully, despite the grim news about our floundering economy, Texas is actually not a bad place to be job hunting. It’s the top state for creating jobs in the country. San Antonio, Austin, Houston, and Dallas are all growing steadily in energy, technology, and education jobs, and San Antonio looks to be the best of all. Credit that in part to the low cost of living (8-10 percent below the national average) and to the fact that San Antonio has a steady flow of college grads coming into the market every year: 35,000 brave souls who chose not to hide out in the ventilation system. The younger demographic allows many companies to fill entry-level positions. Medtronic and Nationwide opened up shop here because of all these eager graduates, and Toyota relocated its Tacoma operation here from California to take advantage of all the high school and college tech graduates. Youth attracts business, and we’ve got a lot of you. “That’s one of the things that’s helped keep us a little more stable than other cities,” says Becky Bridges, vice president of communications at the San Antonio Chamber of Commerce. The local chamber just released its economic forecast for job growth, and the biggest increases are being seen in manufacturing, natural resources/mining (credit that South

WILL DRILL OIL FOR FOOD Texas oilfield boom), trade and transportation, government, and leisure. Yet overall the strongest trends here are in health and education. If your folks spent many tense family dinners telling you to look into nursing, they were right. In San Antonio there’s a whole medical town within the city, and as Andrea Casas, human resources director for University Health System tells us, “We’ve actually been pretty steady with the amount of hiring that we’ve done. We continue to grow as a health care organization and so we continue to have good opportunities.” She cited the ongoing national nursing shortage and the fact that hospitals are 24-hour operations as proof that the work is plentiful if you’ve got the degree. Casas says a nursing salary can range from $35,000 to

“IF YOUR FOLKS SPENT MANY TENSE FAMILY DINNERS TELLING YOU TO LOOK INTO NURSING, THEY WERE RIGHT.”

$80,000 a year. And the demand is not likely to decrease, considering that soon enough San Antonio, like every other city in the United States, will be producing another natural resource: old people. Those same Baby-Booming folks squawking at you about nursing are going to get old soon. And unless we find some island to stick them on where they can reminisce about polyester together and how they got all of us into this financial mess in the first place, they’ll require a lot of medical care. Leading us to another big opening: pharmacists ($75,000-$130,000!). Casas says there’s also a constant need for medical technicians and assistants in all related fields. Meanwhile, Workforce Solutions recently compiled a list of jobs that are on the rise and pay a living wage or above — in other words, good jobs. Information technology (systems analysts and software engineers) and finance (accountants, financial analysts, and insurance agents) are big for degree-holders, but aerospace, manufacturing, construction, and energy are up there, too. And many of those jobs offer on-the-job training. About now you’re probably wondering why we haven’t mentioned that fine-arts degree as a bread-winner; you better take a seat. What qualifies as a potentially profitable major is a matter of some debate. The Princeton Review lists business administration, nursing, biology, and computer sciences among the top ten great

BY BRANDON R. REYNOLDS

Photo illustration by Chuck Kerr

Have a seat, artists — it’s health care, oilfield that drive much of today’s demand ////

degrees, but then it also includes psychology, English (language and lit) and communications studies, which The Daily Beast includes in its ranking of worst majors (journalism, ahem, right at the top). Looking at what’s on the rise in San Antonio, the conclusion we can come to is that an education that trains you to actually do something, whether involving patients or programs or plumbing, is going to ultimately be more valuable than those humanities degrees for the time being. We’re trying to rebuild our country here; we can return to those deep conversations on velvet fainting couches when prosperity returns. Of course, you could always do something to really shake up the folks at family dinner ... something to help flesh out that novel you’ve been pecking on. The shale boom across South Texas’ Eagle Ford and elsewhere has reinvigorated the industry. By God, you could be a roustabout working on oilfield equipment with power tools and making $35.62 an hour! Or work as a welder, a derrick operator, a rotary drill specialist — something to build character and a bit of savings. Shale is the new Gold Rush: wild times, big money, the kind of thing that could have a profound effect on the state’s economy — hell, the national economy — for good or ill. Think about it. You’re young (most of you), and you’ll want some memories of adventure to take to that island of old folks when it’s your time. Whatever the case, you’ll most likely be using your hands in this new society, kind of like what created the old society. Only, we hope, better this time.

brandonrreynolds@gmail.com

TOP SA EMPLOYERS Fort Sam Houston and Lackland AFB (total employment by the military here is 73,000; the presence of the bases here contributing to SA’s strong overall performance during the recession), USAA, H-E-B, school districts and city government, and the health care systems. Bill Miller BBQ has quite a few, too.

RESOURCES Workforce Solutions Alamo (workforcesolutionsalamo.org) Texas Workforce Commission (twc.state.tx.us, workintexas.com) sacurrent.com | August 24-30, 2011 | CURRENT 19


arys

E. Woodlawn

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COLLEGE GUIDE 2011

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ollege students are subject to a variety of (often accurate) stereotypes including, but not limited to, proclivities towards pretention, shallow pockets, and borderline alcoholism. While I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t necessarily condone indulging the latter too much, socializing responsibly doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have to drain already-low funds. Thankfully, San Antonioâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s watering holes offer a variety of daily drink specials for the more parched pupils of the Alamo City. So the next time youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re looking to discuss Nietzscheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Thus Spoke Zarathustra or Derridaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s contributions to deconstructionism between rounds of body shots, check out some of these more student-budget-friendly dealmakers. â&#x20AC;&#x201D; ASHLEY FEINBERG

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COLLEGE GUIDE 2011

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Ways to stay safe (and keep from getting busted) //// BY DAVID MONNICH

SALUD TEQUILABAR

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SECURITY ISSUES

ampus security officers serve two purposes. One, they protect students from criminal activity; two, they arrest students for criminal activity. Every student wishes to be protected from robbery, car theft, and assault, but also doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t want to be arrested for an alcohol or drug offense or the occasional late-night (and innocent) trespass. So, while you may find yourself equally drawn to and repelled by the agents of law and order on your campus, youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re going to have to develop some sort of relationship with them. Excluding drug- or alcohol-related charges, the most common criminal offenses reported on Alamo Colleges and UTSA campuses are burglary, robbery, and motor vehicle theft, according to statistics maintained by the U.S. Department of Education. This may come as no surprise, but there are some simple things you can to do to make yourself a less-likely target. The best way to avoid being robbed is to never leave your property unguarded in a public place, whether that be classrooms, campus lawns, or common areas in dorms. This especially holds true for electronic devices, the most commonly stolen items on college campuses. When it comes to your vehicle: Keep your car locked at all times, park where there are other cars (and in well-lit areas at night), and never leave valuables in plain sight. Of course, it would be unrealistic to suggest that college students never engage in illegal activities. College campuses are hotbeds for underage drinking, pot smoking, and whatever other shenanigans you can think of. Captain Sonego of the UTSA Police Department notes that the most common criminal activities that he and his team have to deal with are alcohol-related offenses by students. As an incoming college senior who has

C

had many friends who have been arrested for having fun (and been close to it myself), I have a few tips for those who wish to continue the revelry. If you want to drink in public, do not carry around an open bottle or can. Rather, pour the liquid in a solid-colored cup or container. Regarding underage drinking, Captain Sonego says, â&#x20AC;&#x153;We do not endorse students that are drinking underage, but if you are going to drink, drink responsibly, do not drink and drive, drink in a safe environment, and be alert of your surroundings.â&#x20AC;? If you want to smoke pot, do not smoke in a dorm. Secret informants, aka your peers, are omnipresent in campus-housing facilities. Smoke somewhere safe outside or buy a vaporizer for your room. If you have a fake ID, only go to bars, gas stations, and liquor stores that have reputations for being lenient. Thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s no need to prove that your fake ID is infallible, because most likely it is not. Ultimately, the most time-tested and proven method to prevent either being busted or preyed upon is to become friends with campus security officers. They are not there to antagonize students, as Captain Sonego notes: â&#x20AC;&#x153;We encourage our officers to walk around and talk to students because we want to be part of the community and we want the students to feel safe and be able to approach us about any problem they have. We want them to feel that bond with us.â&#x20AC;? Whether you are the unfortunate victim of a robbery or are trying to talk your way out of an open-container offense, being friends with those monitoring the safety of your school can only help your cause. If you respect them, they will respect you. If you are hostile to them, they will be hostile to you. Speaking as one who has been there, never underestimate the power of being courteous.

â&#x20AC;˘


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PAYING DUES

COLLEGE GUIDE 2011

Today’s economy makes interships a must //// BY ASHLEY FEINBERG raduating during one of the worst times to enter the job market since the Great Depression, millennials have accepted that they’re relatively screwed when it comes to bringing home the bacon. In a world where a bachelor’s degree on the wall no longer means a fast track, a living wage, and insurance, how do college students get the edge they need to snag those highly coveted, well-paying jobs? Sadly, it could mean a non-paying internship (or two). “In this job market the value of an internship is pretty darn incredible when we have a buyer’s job market which is pretty much what it is right now,” said Rhonda Boyles, director of career services at Our Lady of the Lake University. “Employers can pick from all sorts of people. They’re going to pick the folks that they know, who’s work style they’ve already tried out, and that’s where the intern gets the advantage because they’ve already gone to work for the employer, the employer knows their style, the intern also knows a little bit about the employer as well.” In case you haven’t noticed, job seekers everywhere are falling over themselves these days to for the most menial appointments. Interning isn’t always glamorous (unless, of course, you choose to imagine it’s Lady Gaga asking you to lick 150 envelopes instead of that dry-tongued baby boomer named Carl), and the nonexistent wages mean you may be cooking the linings of your empty pockets (or at least delaying paying back those college loans a little longer) in the hunt for nutrition. However, it’s not always the work you do but the knowledge gained and connections made that prove invaluable. That said, young adults will far too often assume that a few extra lines on a resume are enough to send them to the top of the pile, and they view their time spent laboring for free as inconsequential. Truth be told, a well-placed internship can offer a personal view of the inner workings of your future career. Says Boyles: “From my perspective it’s important you get to test drive the career you want to get into

1. Talk to people. The people working around you are the ones that can help down the road, and forming positive relationships will pay off. 2. Dress for the job you want, not the job you have. A trite sentiment? Yes, but it still holds true. While this doesn’t mean showing up in a threepiece suit and gold pocket watch for a stint in the mailroom, dressing sharp does show the powersthat-be that you care enough to make an effort. 3. Be proactive. So you finished spit-shining Carl’s Buick LeSabre, now what? You may relish having some down time, but your boss will find it far more admirable if you’re able to prove that you’re aggressive and eager to tackle whatever he or she can throw at you. 4. Ask questions. While you ache to give off the appearance of expertise, no one expects an intern to have all the answers. After all, you’re there to learn. Being able to ask for help shows a selfawareness and confidence that is highly coveted in any field. How else will you gain the knowledge and understanding you’re there for? 5. Always say “yes.” Can you file these cases? Absolutely. Do you mind running these notes to HR? On my way. Would you deliver this package to the unmarked white van sitting in the alley behind the office? Just call me Tony Montana. No matter what you might be a asked to do, every task a within reason is an opportunity to learn while l showing your boss that you’re eager g to get involved — and n enough to follow through. competent Plus, at th this point in your life, all experience nce iis good experience.

Courtesy photo

G

before you commit to a job after graduation.” And if you really plan on trading envelope glue for that proverbial bacon, there are steps you can take to pull ahead of the pack — while you’re not groveling at Carl-cum-Gaga’s sparkling stilettos, that is.

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Prepare to be drowning in debt after graduation! — VANESSA RODRIGUEZ Get on the pill. Oh and go to class. — VALERIE SANCHEZ

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SANTIKOS BIJOU CINEMA BISTRO

Located on the banks of the San Antonio River in the old historic Lone Star Brewery, SAMAâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s extensive collection of ancient and contemporary art is best viewed with another person. Take your date on Tuesday from 4-9 p.m. for free, and use the money you saved to splurge on a twilight dinner overlooking the river on the patio of CafĂŠ des Artistes. 200 W Jones Ave, (210) 978-8100, samuseum.org.

Reinvent the date night with a free movie presented by Wonderland of the Americas. Every Thursday night at 7 p.m. a different movie is screened for free. Save your money for the Bijouâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s full food and drink menu, including popcorn. 4522 Fredericksburg Rd, (210) 734-4552, santikos.com/bjiou.html.

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Browse through the McNayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s nearly 20,000 works of art ranging from the medieval period to the 21st century in a breathtaking mansion inspired by the Spanish colonial age. Stroll through the beautiful grounds and museum from 4-9 p.m. on Thursdays for free. 6000 North New Braunfels, (210) 824-5368, mcnayart.org.

THE FLYING SAUCER Parched after a day of classes? Grab a beer with your bro or brosephina and watch the game with $3 pints all day on Mondays. 11255 Huebner #212, (210) 696-5080, beerknurd.com.

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Put your feet in some bowling shoes and throw your ball down the lane on Kool College Kids Nite. $3.25 a game (with shoes) from 6 p.m.-midnight. Or if youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re a night owl, get R RA RAVEN HOOKAH LOUNGE E three hours of bowling for $9 a person from 9 The newestt h hookah k h llounge iin ttown has an p.m.-midnight. We promise not to laugh too hard indie twist: Every Saturday night enjoy live perwhen you gutter. 6700 Huebner, (210) 523-1716, formances by local musicians and comics starting banderasuperbowl.com. at 8 p.m. The atmosphere is laid back and the dĂŠcor a throwback to the Victorian age. With EMBASSY MINIATURE GOLF hookah prices ranging from $12.99 to $15.99, go Take the pressure off your date with more dutch or double date to split costs â&#x20AC;&#x201D; also check playful competition on Embassyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s 18-hole course out the Hookah Happy Hour (5-7 p.m. daily.) for just $7.95 a person. This is a great first-date Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t smoke? Thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s never a cover to watch live idea â&#x20AC;&#x201D; no stress and no overly intimate conversaperformances and a modest BYOB fee. 1255 SW tion. Or raise the stakes by placing bets. Loser Loop 410 #133, (210) 673-3650, buys the winner dessert! 500 Embassy Oaks, ravenhookah.com. (210) 496-5847, embassygolf.com. â&#x20AC;&#x201D; COLLETTE ORQUIZ

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College tips from the Currentâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Facebook friends

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COLLEGE GUIDE 2011

Illustrations by Chuck Kerr

WORST COLLEGE JOBS

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Take One

Have you ever been stuck in an elevator? If so, you know that picking up that red phone doesn’t get you directly connected to the police as you might have hoped. Ha! Those phones are monitored by companies who staff people to sit and wait on your “Emergency Call” and then notify the “appropriate” authorities. During college I worked the night shift for one of these companies. Honestly, it wasn’t that bad … except for the fact that the company I worked for monitored over 250,000 phones nationwide and often they only staffed one person at a time to wait on those calls … yes, one person! If you had to go to the restroom or, for some, take a “smoke” break, you did so at the risk that someone calling might be giving birth while trapped in an elevator. The call volume was unpredictable. In most cases, building managers are supposed to test the emergency phones, so some calls received wouldn’t be emergencies, just some lonely night guard with a creepy conversation. The saddest part of this job was the fact that I often received actual emergency calls, but when I tried the numbers provided for the appropriate authorities, they didn’t work! FYI: never get stuck in a Public Storage after hours. — ANONYMOUS

“FYI: NEVER GET STUCK IN A PUBLIC STORAGE AFTER HOURS.”

Take Two

I used to process textbook orders for the UTSA bookstore. Students placed orders at follett.com and we would either ship their books directly or package them for in-store pick up. Most students came en masse as school began. At this time, Murphy’s Law flash-mobbed us with pornstar impunity. Most employees were incoming freshmen who took the job thinking it would be a quaint part-time retail position. Instead, it was assembly-line work where we processed hundreds of orders over 10-12 hour shifts for minimum wage. Few employees took the work seriously (on account of pay), which led to countless orders being packed/shipped incorrectly or just lost. We wouldn’t find the errors in pick-up orders until the students and/or their families had shown up, which would result in them coming back three or four times. Meanwhile, Follett has strict rules regarding proper ID, book conditions, and refunds. Students who had been waiting in line an hour would be shocked when I’d tell them we require signed letters from parents (often the buyers) for pick up. We’d sell/deliver students books with water damage and then refuse to exchange or buy them back because they had water damage. Some students would try to return a book that was either mispackaged or misordered without a receipt. I knew the likelihood that the receipt was forgotten because of employee negligence was high, but my managers had a “no ticket, no laundry” policy, even when students had a shrinkwrapped $350 math book that was as useful to them as higher education is to Sarah Palin. The worst part: online ordering was supposed to be convenient. It was the most illusory product I’ve ever encountered in my capitalism-drenched life and I still wonder if Roger Ailes has stock in the company. — ADAM CORONADO

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College tips from the Current’s Facebook friends

Go swimming in public fountains! — JACQUELINE LUNA GOLDEN Vandalize a statue in the quad (preferably with sex toys or something that won’t cause permanent damage; it is your tuition which pays for the repairs after all). — JEFF TURNER

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Désirée Prieto

COLLEGE GUIDE 2011

FASHION HUNT

Scoring in the field takes more than knowing where to go

he key to finding affordable and stylish back-to-school fashion is as much about where to go as it is about how to shop. While some stores on the list below may seem obvious, the key is to peruse wisely, which means with patience. Go in the middle of the weekday after a shipment, or early on a Saturday morning when nobody is around, and give yourself plenty of time to infiltrate the racks. Methodically pilfer each section for those perfect, beautiful bargains. Try the juniors and the adult sections, as well as areas reserved for the other gender — you just never know where that score’s going to pop up. Don’t be afraid to make several trips to the dressing rooms. Here are our recommendations, from local to chain.

T

BUFFALO EXCHANGE

MARSHALLS “Don’t “D ’t pay full f ll pri price i for fabulous,” and you just may score a pair of $15 Nikes, Britney Spears or Polo Ralph Lauren perfume for $20, Tommy Hilfiger jeans for $25, and even JanSport backpacks for $15. The Michael Kors snakeskin handbag trending now is half off. Don’t pass up the bath and bed stuff that’s not only a steal but perfect for stocking the college dorm: soaps, candles, incense, and pillows for every finicky head.

T.J. MAXX Here you’ll find the usual affordable clothes and back-to-school furniture. However, T.J. Maxx also has an array of other fashionable finds, like Marc by Marc Jacobs earrings, Michael Kors flats for $50, and L.A.M.B. Williamsfield signature tote bags at more than half off, or a Furla wallet for $69. It’s a one-stop shop for the whole family, as it includes stuff for all ages, like Tory Burch sunglasses, backpacks, lunchboxes and more.

With 43 stores in over 15 states, Buffalo Exchange is the leader of the re-sale fashion industry, offering trends for both sexes and name-brand clothing and accessories traded locally. Bring your vintage frocks for cash or store STEIN MART credit in trade. Store credit includes all purchases This is where to go for eyewear, accessories, of designer name brands, new merchandise, and clothes. Find a pair of Ralph Lauren or Nine leather, and more. Average clothing price is $15. West sunglasses for $11, or men’s Polo shirts 145 W Olmos Dr, (210) 832-8838, buffaloexstarting at $16.94. Shop in the store or online for change.com. the 40-percent-off red-dot clearance discount, running now through August 29. Other finds inTEXAS TRASH CLOTHING clude linens at a bargain, home goods, and gifts.

EXCHANGE

You can buy the latest fashion at Texas Trash, which has new merch coming in weekly. Managers purchase items from customers every Sunday, including designer wear, club wear, and jeans, with specialty in urban styles like goth and punk. They also sell Dickies, American Eagle, Gap, Mossimo, Christian Audigier, Ed Hardy, Levi’s, Tripp, 7 For All Mankind, Juicy Couture, and more. 2100 McCullough Ave, (210) 259-6028.

DO THIS NOW!

DSW SHOES Stop in for name-brand shoes for adults, as well as fashionable handbags for as low as $24.99, wallets, and even passport holders for that study-abroad trip. Check the back racks for clearance items, where you can find name brand shoes like Blowfish, MIA, Steve Madden, Skechers, Keds, and New Balance as much as 30-70 percent off. — DÉSIRÉE PRIETO

College tips from the Current’s Facebook friends

Change your major at least two times. — MONICA MENDIOLA Hang beads (can’t really do that after “growing-up.”) — ANGELA YOST DENTON sacurrent.com | August 24-30, 2011 | CURRENT 33


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COLLEGE GUIDE 2011

File photo

Medical Centerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Favorite Bar!

HAIR CARE 101 Inexpensive back-to-school hair salon options

tepping into a new school year but still sporting that Kate Middleton hairdo circa May 2011? You need to get your duchess-inspired locks into a salon before the next changing of the guard. Luckily, we found a few beauty schools and salons around town that can trim that Middleton into something fresher for a more-than-reasonable price. And you get to support a few students.

S

THE AVEDA INSTITUTE T TH The A Th Aveda d IInstitute, tit t located l t d at the Pearl Brewery, offers a 10 percent discount on all hair services for college students who present their student IDs. This includes discounts on highlights, cuts, and hairstyles, but not those aromatic hair products. 250 Grayson, Ste. 101, (210) 222-0023, avedaisa.com.

THE MILAN INSTITUTE The Milan Institute on Ingram Road offers haircuts Monday through Thursday till the end of August for only $3.99. The price is good for any length of hair and includes a shampoo. Additionally, all-over highlights, the in-house highlight special for this quarter, is half off when you purchase a hair-color product (with all-over highlights starting at $35, this brings

the total down to as little as $17.50). Milan also offers machine steam facials by the esthetician students till the end of August on Thursdays, Fridays, and Saturdays for only $13.99. The 45-minute process includes exfoliating, and shoulder and arm massage. 6804 Ingram Road, (210) 521-6671, milaninstitute.edu.

SAN ANTONIO BEAUTY COLLEGE San Antonio Beauty College offers trims for college students and adults for only $6.50. However, theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re also offering back-to-school haircuts for high schoolers and under. The special runs through August 27, with $3 trims for boys and $4 trims for girls. A design cut, such as layers or bangs, runs $5, regardless of length. 4130 Naco Perrin, (210) 654-9734.

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VOGUE COLLEGE OF COSMETOLOGY Vogue College of Cosmetology, also located on Ingram Road, runs specials throughout the week: $3 haircuts on Tuesdays for any length, boy or girl; facial waxing for $4 on Wednesdays; and highlights on Thursdays starting at $35. 6012 Ingram Rd, (210) 432-5904, voguebeautycollege.com. â&#x20AC;&#x201D; DĂ&#x2030;SIRĂ&#x2030;E PRIETO

Comedy Central, Jimmy Kimmel, Tonight Show, Finalist - Last Comic Standing

LABOR DAY WEEKEND

Rodney Laney Aug. 31- Sept. 4 P. Diddyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Bad Boys of Comedy

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College tips from the Currentâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Facebook friends

Show up to class with vodka coming out of your pores from the night before. â&#x20AC;&#x201D; MANUEL BARRAZA Drop out. â&#x20AC;&#x201D; JOHN HUNTINGTON

Ralphie May Sept. 26-27 Last Comic Standing

Special for UTSA Students, Buy one get one free with ID!

UTSA GRAD!

Bob & Tom Radio Show, San Francisco Intâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;l Comedy Competition

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1/2 PRICE APPS GREAT DRINK SPECIALS!

REVERSE HAPPY HOUR 9pm-11pm

“THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!”

Illustration by Molly Austad

COLLEGE GUIDE 2011

HAPPY HOUR! 4pm-8pm Mon-Fri

BIG THREE Answering those questions most freshmen are scared to ask

HOW OW W DO I AVOID AVO A THE DREADED WITHOUT AN EATING F FRESHMAN 15 W OR DRUG PROBLEM? DISORDER SORDER O

The simplest answer is moderation. One easy way to stay fit is to register for a workout or sports class each semester. Including a friend can help keep you motivated. In addition to keeping you in top form, it could also boost your GPA as long as you actually show up to class. Also, don’t go alcohol crazy your first semester in. This can easily escalate to alcoholism, legal trouble, or a reputation you could have a hard time living down. Drinking is a huge factor in collegiate weight gain, largely because freshmen don’t take into account the calories consumed in alcohol. Oh, as you can imagine, hangovers make it far less likely you’ll actually make that gym appointment, too.

HOW DO I DEAL WITH THE ANTICHRIST AS A ROOMMATE?

There are various types of personality types that drive anyone up the wall, especially when you’re stuck in the same tiny freshman dorm room with them. Crappy roommates include the 24/7 Snoozer, the Psycho Gamer, the Drunk Skunk, the Love Bug (gag), the Homebody, and the One With a Crush On You (flattering, but WTF roomie?). Luckily, there’s a universal solution to dealing with them all, and that is communication. It is on your shoulders to tell your problem roomate when you are upset or annoyed with them — after all, how will they even know you have a problem with them if you never voice it? Once you bring up the conflict, they will more than likely change their ways. If they don’t, you should speak to someone working for residential life at your school. Depending on the seriousness of the situation, you may be switched to a new dorm or get a new roommate.

WHERE CAN I STUDY WITHOUT GETTING DISTRACTED?

No matter how you like to study — in a quiet setting resembling the inside of a padded cell, in relaxed and casual groups, or in a comfortable place where you can show up in boxers — you have options. Your school’s library is a popular choice, unless you run into a lot of friends and acquaintances there, which would render it extremely counterproductive. Do some research online and find some 24-hour restaurants or coffee shops near your school. Most IHOPs, Starbucks, Jim’s, and Denny’s are open 24/7 and have free wi-fi, but check first to make sure. My biggest piece of advice to you about studying environments, however, is to avoid studying in any place you could sleep in (your bed, an overstuffed couch). A textbook under the pillow has long been ruled out as effective study practice — even when the exam is in the morning. — MADDIE RAU

DO THIS NOW!

College tips from the Current’s Facebook friends

Experiment. — JENN RENEE Get a degree in liberal arts and prepare for a great career in the service industry. — TOMMY NEWMAN 36 CURRENT | August 24-30, 2011 | sacurrent.com


Medical Centerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Favorite Bar!

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MONDAY $3.00 Domestic Pints $4 All Vodka

TUESDAY $3.50 Shiner Bock & Blue Moon $4 All Whiskey & Bourbon

(210) 271-9494 302 E. Commerce (between presa & navarro) sacurrent.com | August 24-30, 2011 | CURRENT 37


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COLLEGE GUIDE 2011

Medical Centerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Favorite Bar!

Fun, BEAUTIFUL staff!

HAPPY HOUR 4 - 9pm

Courtesy photo

this bar 9809 Fredericksburg Rd #2 (Across from USAA) â&#x20AC;˘ 210.451.7857

â&#x2014;&#x201E; DO THIS NOW, 11

WALK CAMPUS IN THE WEE HOURS â&#x20AC;&#x153;To see stray cats and ghosts. â&#x20AC;Ś Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s what we did at OLLU,â&#x20AC;? wrote Darrell Hoberer.

START S TART A COMPANY NY

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Then re-assemble it inside of someoneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s dorm while they are away at home!â&#x20AC;? suggests prankster Monte D. Young.

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With all of those distracting extra-curriculars vying for your attention, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s easy to forget that youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re there to learn some stuff. But you did just spend $98 dollars on that calculus text-

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REMEMBER YOUR HOMEWORK 1:

Youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve â&#x20AC;&#x2122; seen The Th Social S Network, right? On a similar note, the idea for what became FedEx was first conceived by its founder, Frederick Smith, for an economics assignment at Yale, although he didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t put the idea into action until years later. Google began as a Stanford research project by founders Larry Page and Sergey Brin.

DISASSEMBLE A CAR



Go to class iin your PJ PJs PJs, while you can.

Your/youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re. Its/Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s. You may seek casual sex, but probably not causal sex (as one Facebook friend scolded another). Edit Yourself by Bruce Ross-Larson is but one of dozens of manuals thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll help if none of your classes have. Remember, you canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t carry your diploma with you all the time. Know the stuff that people expect from a college grad.

86

DRESS FOR SUCCESS, SUCCESS ESS, BUT NOT JUST YET BU

GET YOUR GRAMMAR ACT TOGETHER

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numerous classmates whoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re slaving for the bread.)

DO THIS NOW, 41 â&#x2013;ş

DO THIS NOW!

College tips from the Currentâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Facebook friends

Find that one professor you keep up with after college that you know you can always get advice from. â&#x20AC;&#x201D; ALEXANDRA Oâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;CONNELL Go to Luluâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s cafe at 3 a.m. Midnight breakfast, heck yeah. â&#x20AC;&#x201D; DARRELL HOBERER

07+30)5,$1'6$730 %/$1&25'6$1$1721,27;

Â&#x2021;:,&.(':$<67$77226&20 2XU&OLHQWV&RPH)LUVW sacurrent.com | August 24-30, 2011 | CURRENT 39


40 CURRENT | August 24-30, 2011 | sacurrent.com


COLLEGE GUIDE 2011

Medical Centerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Favorite Bar!

HAPPY HOUR 4 - 9pm

Fun, BEAUTIFUL staff!

Courtesy photo

YO! :)â&#x20AC;? 9809 Fredericksburg Rd #2 (Across from USAA) â&#x20AC;˘ 210.451.7857

â&#x2014;&#x201E; DO THIS NOW, 39 book so you might as well make use of it. Tuition only becomes more burdensome when you have to pay double because you failed your classes.

PLOT YOUR ENTRY INTO THE GUINNESS BOOK OF WORLD RECORDS If itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a group activity, youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll never have a more promising pool of potential co-conspirators waiting to join your quest.

REGISTER TO VOTE And follow up by voting.

WAKE UP IN ANOTHER COUNTRY Without a clue as to how you got there.

FIRE A ROCKETPROPELLED GRENADE In a safe environment, of course.

MOVE OFF CAMPUS And learn to take care of yourself.

LEARN TO COOK As an important part of the above.

GET TO KNOW PEOPLE DIFFERENT FROM YOURSELF They may be easier to find than before, or after.

BEER PONG Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t just play. Learn to dominate. te.

VOLUNTEER FOR RESEARCH You can pick up pocket change and, who knows, say, â&#x20AC;&#x153;She never would have gotten that Nobel Prize without me.â&#x20AC;?

ACQUIRE A MASTER KEY To everything on campus.

WATCH ANIMAL HOUSE One of our colleagues considers it a documentary. See if it is for you.

MAKE THE DEANâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S LIST At least once. If youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re generally a fuck-up, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s nice to prove the problem really is your attitude, not your ability.

GRADUATE And put all this behind you. Begin dispensing unsolicited advice to undergrads.

â&#x20AC;˘

Concept by Detroit Metro Times intern Ally Levise. Execution by Ally Levise and the MT staff (with a lot of help from the San Antonio Currentâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Facebook community). Other suggestions from Current readers are scattered across the guide.

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sacurrent.com | August 24-30, 2011 | CURRENT 41


*Okay, maybe not this one.

We’re STILL smoker friendly! UFC 134 SATURDAY, 27TH 8:00PM

SUNDAY-THURSDAY 6PM AND 9PM FRIDAY - 4PM AND 6PM

NFL TICKET • UFC PPVS • BOXING PPVS Thursday: 2.00 Bud Light pints; $2.75 well drinks Eat, Drink, Smoke and Party Like a Hooligan..

MON – FRI 4PM-2AM • SAT/SUN 11:30am- 2am 13920 N IH 35 • LIVE OAK, TX 78233 IH 35 N @ Loop 1604 Next to Live Oak Cinema

(210) 654-4444 42 CURRENT | August 24-30, 2011 | sacurrent.com

facebook.com/hooligansbarandgrill hooligansbarandgrill.com


COLLEGE GUIDE 2011 ◄ CREDIT, 43 authorized user on their credit card. Make sure to provide your personal information and social security number to the credit card company so that your credit history report will reflect transactions performed on this account. In about six months, after you’ve learned with the authorized user training wheels how to manage your credit reliably and maintained a responsible payment history, you will receive your own credit card offers.

SECURED CREDIT CARD The temptation will be to apply for an unsecured credit card, but that’s still not wise or necessary to establish good credit and good habits. Instead, apply for a secured credit card at your local bank. With a secured credit card, you place a nominal amount of money in a savings account that cannot be withdrawn as it is used as recourse to pay back your debts in case you do not pay them yourself. In essence, your spending limit on your secured card is exactly the amount you place in the linked savings account — hence, your debt is secured by the money in your ac-

count. Just like a normal credit card, you will receive a monthly statement to pay off a portion or all of your debts but meanwhile your payment history will be reported to the credit bureaus. Within months you will receive offers for other unsecured credit cards. It’s not necessary to have more credit cards than you need, because not only will it present temptation, but it may also lower your credit rating. “The bottom line here is that once you have use of a credit card, you want to pay your bills on time, keep your balances low, don’t take on more credit than you need, and if you’ve missed a payment you should get current and stay current,” he added. “Good credit can be your best financial friend as you go through life and bad credit can be the ball and chain that drags you down.”

Gabe Albarian, a 28-year-old businessman, has worked in real estate sales, finance, and investment for nearly 10 years and has done extensive consulting work in personal finance for both individuals and groups.

CONTRIBUTOR BIOS Collette Orquiz is from Portland, Texas, and attends Our Lady of the Lake University in San Antonio. Majoring in Communication Arts with an emphasis in journalism and minoring in forensic science, she’s a senior and is graduating in May 2012. David Monnich goes to Williams College, located in the hinterlands of New England. It’s cold and dark there, allowing for study free of distractions. He is an English major and a proud member of the Class of 2012. Hilton Head Island, S.C.-born Maddie Rau is a senior communication major at Trinity University (class of 2012) and a Senior Pulse Reporter/Intern Liaison at The Trinitonian. Molly Austad is a Los Angeles-based designer. She is currently pursuing a bachelor’s degree in design/media arts from the University of California Los Angeles. Ashley Feinberg, a rising senior from Dallas, will be graduating from Trinity University this spring with a degree in English and communication.

One final note:

SPECIAL THANKS TO OUR SUMMER 2011 INTERNS! Thanks for all the coffee and pencil-sharpening.

DO THIS NOW!

College tips from the Current’s Facebook friends

Skip class. — REN VELASQUEZ Get the bottom feeder job out [of] the way so you can get a GOOD job when you graduate. — LAUREL DAGGER 44 CURRENT | August 24-30, 2011 | sacurrent.com


SHOW COLLEGE ID & RECEIVE

 All Regular Priced Items Valid Thru 8/26-8/28 only!

SENSUAL SUNDAY

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TANTALIZING TUESDAY

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WOMENâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S WEDNESDAY /DGLHV5HFHLYHRII

THURSDAY â&#x20AC;&#x153;MENâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S HAPPY HOURâ&#x20AC;? SPWLOSP$OO0HQ5HFHLYH2II $OO5HJXODU3ULFHG6DOH,WHPV

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* Discounts are applied to all regular priced items

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San Antonio’s Premier Indoor...

BYOB Hookah Lounge!

Over 70 flavors of Shisha….

so no matter what you’re cravin’ we are sure to have something for you!

Art | Music | Film | Comedy | Poetry Hookah Happy Hour! EVERYDAY 5 - 7p

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The Office of Student Life Presents

SEPTEMBER 16 FROM 6 TO 9 PM LOFTIN STUDENT CENTER

SEPTEMBER 23 GREEN LANTERN

BASEBALL OCTOBER 29 & 30

BOXING SOFTBALL SOCCER

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All events are FREE to SAC Students with student ID; call for non-Student pricing. For more information contact the Office of Student Life at San Antonio College: (210) 486-0125 / 1300 San Pedro Ave San Antonio College is an EOE. For any special accommodations, issues or an alternate format, contact San Antonio College disABILITY Support Services at 486-0020

48 CURRENT | August 24-30, 2011 | sacurrent.com

NOVEMBER 4 CAPTAIN AMERICA LOFT IN STUDENT CENTER MALL AREA


SA Current College Guide 2011