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Strike Success Wednesday's day of action staged by The Association of ^ Universities Teachers (AUT) and the National and Local Government Officers Association ( N A L G O ) has been described by Union officials as 'very successful'. Nationally, fourty-four universities were affected and public meetings were held in town centres throughout the country. At Imperial College many students stayed away from lectures in a gesture of support for the strike, which also had support from IC Union, and the Rector Professor Eric A s h . T h e s t r i k e ' s a i m , as e x p l a i n e d in t h e F E L I X s t r i k e S p e c i a l w a s to o u t l i n e the A U T ' s c o n c e r n over spending cuts, and N A I G O c l a i m for h i g h e r w a g e s . J a n i c e L e w i s , the b r a n c h s e c r e t a r y of N A L G O w a s 'pleased' with the strike's progress which achieved 'valuable national publicity'. M a n y s t u d e n t s d i d not c r o s s t h e p i c k e t l i n e s a n d a n u m b e r of delivery vans were turned away. In t h e P h y s i c s d e p a r t m e n t o n l y 75 (out of 200) t u r n e d u p f o r morning lectures.

The Rector, Professor NALGO, ASTMS and

Eric ICU.

Ash,

P r o f e s s o r A s h , s p e a k i n g at the p i c k e t line s a i d that it w a s e s s e n t i a l that B r i t a i n s h o u l d h a v e m o r e S c i e n c e t e a c h e r s of a h i g h e r c a l i b r e . H e felt l o w p a y levels in the U K w e r e e n c o u r a g i n g l e c t u r e r s to w o r k a b r o a d , a n d that t h e r e is a n e e d to u s e the m e d i a to c h a n g e government policy. Keith J o s e p h was, he said, well i n t e n t i o n e d but i l l - i n f o r m e d . M r A s h s u g g e s t e d that a 24 h o u r w o r k - i n s h o u l d be s t a g e d , by

Science SOS A motion c o n d e m n i n g the governments policy on science f u n d i n g w a s l o d g e d by f o u r M P s o n T u e s d a y in s u p p o r t of the S a v e B r i t i s h S c i e n c e campaign. The campaign, which is s u p p o r t e d by t h e R e c t o r E r i c A s h , and the former R e c t o r L o r d F l o w e r s a i m s to i n f o r m t h e p u b l i c a n d p o l i t i c i a n s of t h e d a m a g e c a u s e d by r e d u c e d s p e n d i n g o n S c i e n c e . S i n c e it invitation eight w e e k s ago S B S h a s a t t r a c t e d 1500 m e m b e r s including Vice Chancellors, F e l l o w s of the R o y a l S o c i e t y and eight N o b e l Laureates. P r o f e s s o r A s h e x p l a i n e d the effects c u t s w e r e h a v i n g at Imperial C o l l e g e . H e t o l d F E L I X that the c u t b a c k s of 1 5 % by t h e Universities Grants C o u n c i l h a v e ' m a d e it d i f f i c u l t for Imperial C o l l e g e to k e e p u p with c o m p e t i t i o n o v e r s e a s H e a l s o p o i n t e d out that t h e l a c k of m o n e y a v a i l a b l e in t h e U K f o r Free!

r e s e a r c h h a s l e a d to a ' b r a i n d r a i n ' , a n d a d d e d that I m p e r i a l was experiencing greater d i f f i c u l t y in f i l l i n g v a c a n t c h a i r s a n d a c a d e m i c p o s t s as a result. D u r i n g his visit to t h e p i c k e t line s o n W e d n e s d a y the R e c t o r a n n o u n c e d his i n t e n t i o n to d o n a t e a d a y s w a g e s to S B S . A f o u n d i n g m e m b e r of t h e S B S campaign Professor Denis N o b l e w h o h e l d the c h a i r of P h y s i o l o g y at O x f o r d t o l d F E L I X of his c o n c e r n that ' d u r i n g the past 5 years the gap between the U K ' s r e s e a r c h s p e n d i n g a n d that of its c o m p e t i t o r s h a s i n c r e a s d by 3 0 % ' . H e w e n t o n to s a y B r i t a i n b e n e f i t s w o u l d if m o r e of t h e m o n e y c u r r e n t l y being spent on defence r e s e a r c h w a s a l l o c a t e d to c i v i l r e s e a r c h a n d p o i n t e d out t h e f i n d i n g s of the E d u c a t i o n A r t s S c i e n c e C o m m i t t e e in 1985 w h i c h s t a t e d that C i v i l s p i n offs from military research were Friday 17

speaks

to representatives

of

AUT

students. A m o n g s t other things this w o u l d c o m p r i s e e a r l y morning discussion groups, a midnight meal, and a lecture p r e s e n t e d by M r A s h o n t h e last fifty y e a r s of U n i v e r s i t y education. C o l i n D i x o n an A U T C o m m i t t e e m e m b e r told F E L I X that f u r t h e r a c t i o n w a s l i k e l y in t h e f o r m of a o n e o r t w o a n d a half d a y r e g i o n a l s t r i k e . H e w e n t o n to e x p r e s s his t h a n k s to IC U n i o n for l e n d i n g its s u p p o r t .

i n f r e q u e n t . H e a d d e d ' B r i t a i n is t h e o n l y W e s t e r n N a t i o n to s p e n d m o r e t h a n 5 0 % of its research funds on defence.' S h o r t a g e of f u n d s at IC h a v e a l s o l e d t o t h e a b a n d o n i n g of important research work. T h e C o l l e g e w a s u n a b l e to g a i n a ÂŁ130,000 g r a n t f r o m t h e S c i e n c e and Engineering Research C o u n c i l for r e s e a r c h i n t o a b r a n c h of a t o m i c p h y s i c s w h i c h has previously p r o v i d e d the b a s i s for a d v a n c e s in M i c r o electronic and lasers. T h e grant w a s r e q u i r e d for s p e c i a l i s t equipment, including a 'super m a g n e t ' for a n e x p e r i m e n t i n v o l v i n g p a s s i n g a n e w t y p e of l a s e r t h r o u g h a c l o u d of a t o m s . T h e w o r k is n o w to be t a k e n u p by a G e r m a n r e s e a r c h laboratory. P r e s e n t f o r e c a s t s p r e d i c t that by 1990 J a p a n will h a v e ten t i m e s as m a n y s c i e n t i s t s as B r i t i a n , a n d that W e s t G e r m a n y will have four times the n u m b e r It is h o p e d by t h e S B S c a m p a i g n that, by b r i n g i n g t h e p r o b l e m into t h e p u b l i c light, they c a n force the G o v e r n m e n t to t ake a c t i o n .

January


tf A U T Strike The A U T Strike on W e d n e s d a y a p p e a r s to have been an e n o r m o u s s u c c e s s . It g a i n e d a l a r g e a m o u n t of c o v e r a g e in t h e national press. Professor A s h is right w h e n h e s a y s that t h e g e n e r a l p u b l i c m u s t b e a w a r e of t h e problems facing universities. T h i s means that t o d a y ' s p r o t e s t m u s t be f o l l o w e d by s t r i k e s , l o b b i e s a n d sit ins. T h e g o v e r n m e n t m u s t be m a d e to s e e that it n e e d s to invest in e d u c a t i o n . IC U n i o n , traditionally an apathetic u n i o n , n e e d s to b e part of

t h e s e p r o t e s t s . If I C students protest the government may take n o t i c e . T h e r e is g o i n g to be an e l e c t i o n in next t h r e e years and many universities are in m a r g i n a l s e a t s . Universities have influence. W e must s h o w the g o v e r n m e n t that w e ' r e p r e p a r e d to u s e that i n f l u e n c e a g a i n s t t h e m if they d o n ' t start i n v e s t i n g in education. Nicaraguan Coffee Student union services are m e a n ' t to be s e r v i c e s r u n by s t u d e n t s for s t u d e n t s . T h i s m e a n s that if s t u d e n t s feel s t r o n g l y a b o u t i s s u e s

like S o u t h A f r i c a a n d N i c a r a g u a they s h o u l d be a b l e to c h a n g e their s u p p l i e r s . It m a y not m a k e c o m m e r c i a l s e n s e but if you want a c o m m e r c i a l m e a l y o u g o to M a c D o n a l d s and buy a burger. Dave Kingston s h o u l d not h a v e o p p o s e d the m o t i o n o n c o f f e e at Tuesday's U G M on commercial grounds. A s a s a b b a t i c a l y o u ' r e m e a n t to w o r k for s t u d e n t s w h i c h m e a n s y o u s h o u l d listen to their wishes. Christmas Tree W e d i s c o v e r e d this week that o u r C h r i s t m a s tree w a s t a k e n by t h e c l e a n e r s w h o d e c i d e d that it w a s t i m e to c l e a r u p the o f f i c e after C h r i s t m a s . W e w o u l d like to a p p o l o g i s e to B e i t

F E L I X is p u b l i s h e d by the E d i t o r for a n d on behalf of Imperial C o l l e g e U n i o n P u b l i c a t i o n s B o a r d a n d is printed Fourth A v e n u e , 4 F a r n h a m R o y a l , K e n n i n g t o n . T e l e p h o n e 735 6437: E d i t o r H u g h S o u t h e y ; B u s i n e s s M a n a g e r J Martin ' S t i n g ' T a y l o r ; C o p y r i g h t F E L I X 1986. I S S N 1040-0711

Union Now Opens at 5.30pm on Wednesdays Happy hours Tuesday and Thursday evenings between 6 and 8pm. Beer 50p/pint

Dave Parry Replies

Applications are invited for

WARDEN

s Free flat provided Applications from IC Union Office on a Standard Application Form. Job Description will also be available. Forms to be returned to Carl Burgess, President ICU, no later than

, The Post is only available for couples 2

Security who apparently g o t in t r o u b l e after last terms news story. Credits T h a n k s to B i l l G o o d w i n for t a k i n g o v e r as N e w s E d i t o r at s h o r t n o t i c e , J M a r t i n Taylor and Sunny Bains, Mark Hunter, Rosemary Hosking, Dave Jones, Richard Smith, Kamala Sen, Jane Speigel, Rob Dwyer-Jones, Chris Stapleton, A a r o n Kotcheff, A n d y Vickers, Sarah Kirk, J o h n Burgess, Mark Cottle, Chris Edwards and e v e r y o n e I've f o r g o t t e n . A s p e c i a l t h a n k s to J e l l y a n d T on y Spencer and everyone else w h o collated late last w e e k a n d to D a v e K i n g s t o n for h e l p i n g us out with the printing. There's a staff m e e t i n g this F r i d a y .

Dear Mr Beck, T h a n k y o u for y o u r letter c o n c e r n i n g t h e rents f o r s i n g l e r o o m s in H a m l e t G a r d e n s . T h e reasons for t h e r e v i s e d bills are t w o fold: (a) H e a d T e n a n c y flats are r e n t e d o n a 38 w e e k b a s i s a n d t h e bills for t h e y e a r are u s u a l l y d i v i d e d into A u t u m n T e r m a n d Christmas Vacation, Easter Term and Easter Vacation and A u t u m n Term gas and electricity, and S u m m e r Term and Easter gas and electricity. A t the b e g i n n i n g of t e r m I m a d e t h e m i s t a k e of allocating Hamlet G a r d e n s o n a n 11 w e e k b a s i s , ie to the e n d of t h e A u t u m n | T e r m . T h u s at a later d a t e | (end of N o v e m b e r ) I i a m m e n d e d the A u t u m n T e r m bills to i n c l u d e t h e | Christmas Vacation. (b) S o m e flats c o n t a i n single rooms. Hamlet G a r d e n s is a l l o c a t e d in t w o

Friday 17 J a n u a r y

b l o c k s (Flats 9-140 a n d F l a t s 2 0 1 - 2 2 0 ) . At t h e b e g i n n i n g of t e r m ( w h e n allocating rooms) I was o n l y a w a r e of 4 of t h e s e . D u r i n g t h e first c o u p l e of weeks some people came in a n d t o l d m e t h e y w e r e in s i n g l e s and I altered their bills. D u r i n g the term various attempts were m a d e to d i s c o v e r w h o e l s e had single rooms. Thus when December came a l o n g I felt that t h e s e bills n e e d e d s o r t i n g out b e f o r e t h e e n d of t e r m . T h u s I s e l e c t e d p e o p l e at r a n d o m a n d s e n t t h e m n e w bills a l o n g with the c o v e r i n g letter. When your groups signed u p for t h e flat y o u e n t e r e d into a c o n t r a c t to p a y a c e r t a i n a m o u n t of rent p e r w e e k . W h e n t h e flat o c c u p a n t s received their bills it w o u l d h a v e b e e n o b v i o u s to m a k e s u r e that t h e w e e k l y bill w a s c o r r e c t . A l s o , t h e p e o p l e in d o u b l e r o o m s s u r e l y w o u l d have r a i s e d q u e s t i o n s a s to w h y they were paying the s a m e as t h o s e in s i n g l e r o o m s . I a p o l o g i s e for t h e s e e m i n g l a c k of communication and a p p a r e n t interest f r o m myself (charges w h i c h I heartily deny) a n d the t r o u b l e w h i c h has b e e n c a u s e d by t h e r e - i s s u i n g of bills. S t e p s have n o w b e e n t a k e n to i m p r o v e t h e c h e c k i n g of d a t e s of stay a n d rents c h a r g e d . Yours sincerely. Dave Parry Student Services Finance Assistant

FELIX


Imperial Animals] Sir, I write regardin g the opinion column on Hon P o r n night. W h i l e I a m r e l i e v e d by D a v e P e a r c e ' s a s s u r a n c e that he d o e s not maltreat w o m e n , I d o not t h i n k his a r g u m e n t s s t a n d up in a n y c o n t e x t w i d e r than the R S M U n i o n office, for t h e f o l l o w i n g r e a s o n s : — F i r s t l y , if t h e a u d i e n c e m e r e l y e n j o y t h e thrill of 'watching something socially taboo', why does that s o m e t h i n g a l w a y s h a v e to be p o r n o g r a p h y ? T h e r e are m a n y o t h e r s o c i a l t a b o o s , as I a m s u r e m e m b e r s of R S M c a n testify. Secondly, although I a g r e e that s e x is n a t u r a l , I d o feel that s e x b e t w e e n a pig and a (human) w o m a n m u s t be a n e x c e p t i o n to t h e rule. T h i s , I a m a s s u r e d is part of t h e 'entertainment' available. Thirdly L o n d o n caters a d e q u a t e l y for p e o p l e w i s h i n g to w a t c h s t r i p p e r s and pornography, so there is no n e e d for H o n P o r n n i g h t to be h e l d e v e n o n c e a y e a r at I m p e r i a l C o l l e g e . T o s u m up my objections to H o n P o r n n i g h t , not o n l y is it d e g r a d i n g to b o t h performers and audience,

but it is a l s o uneo*6sary. A s a m a n at I m p e r i a l C o l l e g e , I d o n ' t w a n t to be b r a n d e d an a n i m a l , a n i m b e c i l e or a s e x i s t , s o although I can appreciate R S M ' s d e s i r e to be a u t o n o m o u s , they s h o u l d also realise the responsibilities they have as part of I m p e r i a l C o l l e g e , and Imperial C o l l e g e Union. Responsibilities w h i c h c a n n o t be lifted m e r e l y by m o b i l i s i n g t h e now-infamous R S M Blockvote. Yours Pete Wilson Computing 2

Morally Degrading

Dear Sir, T h e s h a l l o w a n d often n o n sensical commentary from D a v e P e a r c e of R S M U ' j u s t i f y i n g ' the R S M U 'Rugby' Club's H o n Porn N i g h t is a fair i n d i c t m e n t of t h e event in itself. M a y w e try t o offer w h a t w e b e l i e v e FELIX

to be r e a s o n a b l e a n d intelligent argument against s u c h events. F i r s t l y t r a d i t i o n is no j u s t i f i c a t i o n for c o n t i n u i n g to b e h a v e in a p a r t i c u l a r w a y . It is u n d o u b t e d l y t r u e that p o r n o g r a p h i c e v e n t s , w h i l s t in t h e m s e l v e s bringing excitement and 'thrills' to c e r t a i n s e c t i o n s of t h e p o p u l a t i o n , are morally degrading. Mr Pearce's contention that t h e a u d i e n c e d o not watch p o r n o g r a p h i c events f o r s e x u a l p l e a s u r e is, q u i t e f r a n k l y , n a i v e . W e f i n d it s u r p r i s i n g that, as a n i n t e l l i g e n t p e r s o n (with A levels as w e l l ) , he r e g a r d s it s i m p l y as s o m e h i g h spirited boyish naughtiness. His remarks on sexism, particularly about the lingerie industry in t h i s c o u n t r y , s h o w a d e g r e e of misunderstanding and i n s e n s i t i v i t y that is disturbing. 'Do the a u d i e n c e c o m e a w a y f e e l i n g that w o m e n are for s e x o n l y ? ' , h e a s k s himself. T h e content a n d d i r e c t i o n of p o r n o g r a p h i c f i l m s c l e a r l y p r e s e n t t h i s to be a p r i m a r y , if not s o l e r o l e of w o m e n in s o c i e t y . T h i s c a n be t h e o n l y v i e w b e it c o n s c i o u s or s u b c o n s i o u s , o n e leaves w i t h after w a t c h i n g s u c h a f i l m , a n d o n e , in o u r v i e w , w h i c h is as d e g r a d i n g to m e n a s it is to w o m e n . T o present what was n t e n d e d by G o d (as M r P e a r c e tentatively a r g u e s a n d that w e w o u l d m a i n t a i n ) to be a n a t u r a l act b e t w e e n a m a n a n d w o m a n in a c o m m i t e d r e l a t i o n s h i p (ie M a r r i a g e ) , as a p u b l i c p e r f o r m a n c e a n d f urt her, t h e p o r t r a y a l of unatural sex acts (whether 'just a c t e d ' or real) is a b e t r a y a l of o u r s e l f - r e s p e c t a n d p e r v e r s i o n of h u m a n dignity. It is s a d that r e l a t i v e l y intelligent a n d s e n s i b l e p e o p l e s h o u l d find their e x c i t e m e n t a n d t h r i l l s in s e x u a l f a n t a s i e s or in getting paralytically drunk, or w h a t e v e r , r e f l e c t i n g , s u r e l y , t h e i r l o w level of e x p e c t a n c y of a f u l f i l l e d a n d p r o d u c t i v e life. A s C h r i s t i a n s w e b e l i e v e that J e s u s C h r i s t c a m e to offer t h e w o r l d l i f e — a life of ful«ess and purpose, J e s u s s a i d , 'I h a v e c o m e that t h e y m a y h a v e life, a n d have it to t h e f u l l ' ( J o h n 10 v11); a n d he laid d o w n his o w n life that w e m i g h t e n j o y this life n o w . faithfully Yours Steven Burgess Civ Eng 3 Gaynor Whyles Life Sci 3 Sarah Kirk Bio Chem 2 Nick Gardner Civ Eng 2

Minor Thinking W i i w o n t to g o to an o n p o r n s nite by M C P M i n o r ( a g e d 10 3/4) it is i l l e a g l e in this c u n t r y to r a p e w i m m i n an s o p e e p l e like m e hav to g o to strip s h o w s to w e r k off o u r frustrashun. Evry w u n hoo s e z t h i s is s e x i s t m u s t be a l e z b i a n (but m a y i s a y i dont hold anything against the beoutiful G r e e k island of L e s b o s c o s of this) i w o o d like to t h a n k all those peeple wot have p r o m o t e d t h e e z e v e n t s in the p a s t e s p e s i a l l y W I S T , a n d t h a n k t h e m for m a k i n g m e t h i n k wot a c h a n g e this m a k e s f r o m w a n k i n g in m y r o o m . F i n i l y i w o n t to s a y r s m is a l a r g e l y m a l e i n s t i t u t i o n m a n y of w h o s e graduates d e p e n d on S o u t h A f r i k a for j o b s s o w e e v g o t better t h i n g s to t h i n k a b o u t t h a n ic w i m m i n . X

Coach Savings Dear Editor, I w o u l d like to b r i n g to t h e a t t e n t i o n of c l u b a n d s o c i e t y o f f i c i a l s , w h o are r e s p o n s i b l e for c o a c h

b o o k i n g s , that C a p i t a l C o a c h e s L i m i t e d hir e c h a r g e s for t r i p s to destinations outside L o n d o n are c o m p a r a t i v e l y expensive. Officials can easily save not o n l y IC U n i o n , but a l s o their m e m b e r s , a significant s u m of m o n e y by h i r i n g from another c o m p a n y . Yours faithfully Douglas Kelly ACC Transport Officer.

l III

Porn not a'Preece'iated Dear Sir, L a s t w e e k w e h a d an explanation and j u s t i f i c a t i o n of t h e R o y a l S c h o o l of M i n e s H o n P o r n night from the President himself. M r P e a r c e b e l i e v e s that H o n P o r n is s e x i s t , but o n l y b e c a u s e it a p p e a l s m a i n l y to m e n , in t h e s a m e w a y that w e a r i n g b r a s a p p e a l s to w o m e n . T h i s is r i d i c u l o u s , H o n P o r n s is s e x i s t b e c a u s e it d e g r a d e s and humiliates men and w o m e n portraying them as o b j e c t s to b e u s e d a n d a b u s e d . Not so, says R S M ,

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in h i s s e c o n d p o i n t , w e a r e t o l d that t h e e v e n t is not d e g r a d i n g b e c a u s e the a u d i e n c e d o n o t w a t c h it for s e x u a l p l e a s u r e a n d b e c a u s e s e x is a n a t u r a l act . O f c o u r s e s e x is a n a t u r a l act. but not that w h i c h is p o r t r a y e d in H o n P o r n night H a r d - c o r e p o r n o g r a p h y of t h e w o r s t kind normally shown includin g several acts between w o m e n and animals, g a n g rapes, a n d scenes linking sexual acts with extreme violence. I f i n d it h a r d t o understand why R S M U has to p l a c e s u c h i m p o r t a n c e o n this event w h i c h has b e e n s o h a r m f u l to o u r C o l l e g e and our reputation as s t u d e n t s h e r e , a n d s h o w s a n y a t t e m p t to c r i t i c i s e H o n P o r n is s e e n as a d i r e c t a s s a u l t o n t h e R S M U itself as if it w e r e t h e central event in the u n i o n ' s life.

I also wonder why Mr P e a r c e w a n t s to flaunt before the C o l l e g e the fact that t h e y ' v e h e l d H o n P o r n night without a n y o n e k n o w i n g a b o u t it. It is t h e n , t h e t h r i l l of d o i n g something socially taboo, as h e m e n t i o n s in h i s article and then telling everyone how wicked y o u ' v e b e e n . I'm s o r r y , but that a p p r o a c h is m o r e r e m i n e s c e n t of s c h o o l children having a secret s m o k e behind the bike sheds, than a mature attitude to r u n n i n g a students' u n i o n . I h o p e that M r P e a r c e w i l l c o n t i n u e to be o p e n m i n d e d in t h e f u t u r e s o that w e c a n h a v e sensible d i s c u s s i o n s o n this s u b j e c t that are not limited b y t h e a s s u m p t i o n that ' t h e s h o w must go on'. Yours faithfully Roger Preece

ACCOMMODATION

ANNOUNCEMENT • S i l w o o d P a r k XI F o o t b a l l team starved of decent o p p o s i t i o n . Will play at H y d e Park or S i l w o o d . A n y team interested c o n t a c t N B a i n b r i d g e t h r o u g h internal m a i l : R e a c t o r C e n t r e , S i l w o o d or internal t e l e p h o n e S i l w o o d 284 • T h e F o u r t h D a y of t h e W e e k M u s i c to gel y o u r hair to o n 999/301 M W 68pm every S a t u r d a y . L i s t e n t o it. • S k y d i v e IC p a r a c l u b is a b o u t to run a b e g i n n e r s c o u r s e . C o n t a c t A» M a c l e o d E E 3 for details. • B a r n D a n c e Visit t h e G u i l d s O f f i c e for y o u r ticket only £2.00. • G e t p h y s i c a l ! D a n c e the night away at the Valentine s B a r n D a n c e , 14 February. • P r i n c e s s I D A by G i l b e r t a n d S u l l i v a n . P r e s e n t e d by O p s o c 18-22 F e b r u a r y in the U n i o n C o n c e r t H a l l . • T u e s d a y 6.00pm S C R B e i t W i n e tasting are out, o n c e more, to tantalise those taste b u d s , this week with white w i n e s from B o r d e a u x . T h e s e i n c l u d e Entre deux M e r s — C r i s p a n d dry, G r a v e s — r i c h a n d full b o d i e d a n d S a u t e r n e s — l u s c i o u s , b u x o m a n d the Q u e e n ' s favourite (also R o b i n ' s ! ) . O n l y at £3 for m e m b e r s a n d £4 n o n members. • D o y o u like w a t c h i n g f i l m s ? B e c o m e S T O I C ' S film reviewer a n d wat c h press s h o w i n g s free. If y o u are Interested c o m e a n d s e e u s W e d a f t e r n o o n s in t h e T V S t u d i o d o w n the w a l k w a y o r o u r U n i o n R m in Union Buildling. • J a z z c l u b n e w year h o p W e d 27 J a n 7.30pm. Free b o o z e a n d D i s c o a n d C o l l e g e B a n d s , D u o , the Beat B a n d i t s a n d the C h a r l i e B r o w n T r i o . £2.50 T i c k e t s from J o h n N o b l e C h e m E n g 2. • T h e D e L a B e c h e C l u b presents a n international s y m p o s i u m 21 F e b r u a r y 1986, in the G r e a t H a l l , Imperial C o l l e g e . A d m i s s i o n by ticket o n l y Price £1. Contact C h a s Goldring G e o 3. 4

• S i n g l e r o o m i m m e d i a t e l y available in flat in S t r e a t h a m . Rent £130 per m o n t h . N o rent to p a y until 14th February. Contact Rufus Short, Elec E n g U G P i g e o n holes. • L u x u r y flat to let twin b e d r o o m , l o u n g e , k i t c h e n , b a t h r o o m , storer o o m . £70pw for entire p r e m i s e s or £35pw s h a r e d o n o . C o n t a c t J B r u c e P h y s i c s 3 or 240 9096 before 7 p m o r 242 4398 thereafter. • S i n g l e r o o m , l u x u r i o u s flat for s i x , 20 m i n s from C o l l e g e , H i g h Street K e n s i n g t o n £37pw i n c H W / C H P h o n e 6038104 eve. • M a l e p o s t g r a d u a t e r e q u i r e d to s h a r e 2 person flat in L e x h a m G a r d e n s , 10 m i n s walk from C o l l e g e , o w n T V , u s e of p h o n e . A v a i l a b l e f r o m m i d F e b rent £30pw. C o n t a c t Richard Homan C h e m Eng Pig Holes or 01 373 8399 (even). FOR SALE • G r a p h i c Equaliser Black Sansui S E 300, 7 b a n d s per c h a n n e l . U n w a n t e d C h r i s t m a s present, c a n d e m o n s t r a t e d , £55 c o n t a c t David C a m p d e n 01 736 5631 or v i a M e c h E n g Letter R a c k . • H i f i one year old Phillips 25wpc A m p , P h i l l i p s D o l b y B / C tape D e c k (with A P 8 8 5 ) S h a r p T u n e r , A D C Turntable, K E F Speakers. Prices N e g o t i a b l e for total o r s e p a r a t e s . C o n t a c t P M a n t o v a n i E E 2. • T w o T i c k e t s for A C / D C F r i d a y 17th J a n . £8.00 e a c h . C o n t a c t T o n y B l a c k l e r Internal 4517. • H o n d a 4 0 0 N E n g i n e plus c a r b s , e x h a u s t a n d ignition s y s t e m £150. With front e n d a n d brakes £180. C a n be tried before sale. N e w i s h s h o c k s (Girling) for 250/400 Y a m a h a £15. N e w tank (boxed) for H o n d a C G 1 2 5 £30. C o n t a c t G . P u r d o m C h e m E n g III. WANTED • C a r Share going London—Durham (will drop off e g Sheffield). S h a r e petrol c o s t s . M a r k H a r d m a n W o r k 01 278 2491 ext 243, H o m e 0442 53174.

Ashamed of IC

Dear Sir, I found David Pearce's article on H o n P o r n night ( F E L I X 725) v e r y patronising a n d , I think, deliberately naive. M r P e a r c e i n f e r s that m a n u f a c t u r e of b r a s a n d H o n P o r n night are 'sexist' in t h e s a m e w a y , w h i c h l e a d s m e t o b e l i e v e that h e totally m i s u n d e r s t a n d s the i s s u e s . M a n u f a c t u r e of b r a s is not d e g r a d i n g t o m e n . T h e e v e n t , b y its v e r y nature, subjugate s w o m e n , a n d s o to s u g g e s t t h a t to watch w o m e n as objects,

• A s S h a k e s p e a r e o n c e wrote: ' O u t Vile J e l l y ' • F r e e S o x . J o i n O d d s o c or f i n d out how. C h o i c e of plain o r kinky, a n d g l o w in t h e dark. • W a t c h out for wilf H e ' s a real m e a n guy. • S O S is S c a n d a l o n S t e v e not o n ? W a t c h this s p a c e . • W a n t e d o n e f e m a l e to s h a r e r o o m in T i z a r d A p p l y R M 527. • P u f f t e r ? N o t a c c o r d i n g to 416. •Subtlety Award 1986—Mark Dixon Chem 3 • V A M P I R R e m o v a l s - T h a n k s for the c h o c o l a t e s . H a p p y C h r i s t m a s to y o u all M o . • M a r k - P l e a s e don't forget the B u d d h a - o r t h e Thai W h i s k e y ! • F - K Blackmail calendars-place your orders now. • F o u n d in B o t Z o o C o m m o n room. Light g r e y / m a u v e jacket (anorak) unclaimed since October. Contact N i c k G a r d n e r Ext 9430 or C i v E n g 2 • S u p e r m a n calling W O B B L Y B I T S : What are y o u ? • Y O G G I B E A R calling B O O B O O : Y o u eat m o r e than the average bear!! • W a t c h o u t , the playin g c a r d s are after y o u . • E v e r h a d the S $ $ T s c a r e d out of y o u by a pilot's b a d l a n d i n g ? W h y not let IC P a r a c l u b help y o u leave before it's t o o late. A M a c l e o d (EE) for details. • D o n ' t m i s s T i z a r d H a l l ' s re-run of ' T h e Water B a b i e s ' starring T i m a n d Babs. • V a l e n t i n e s d a y B a r n D a n c e is c o m i n g y o u r w a y s o o n . Will y o u be mine? • E v e n 7 pairs of Bristol's c o u l d n ' t put IC water p o l o team off. • M a s s e u r r e q u i r e d for treatment of sporting injury—see D Wilson C o m p u t i n g 3. • W h a t d o e s c h a i n , lock a n d Wetsuit arm have in c o m m o n ! A s k D W i l s o n D o c 3.

PERSONAL • N e w W a r d e n s of S o u t h w e l l B e w a r e . T h e g a n g of four are out to get y o u . • O n l y s k y d i v e r s k n o w w h y t h e birds sing. Friday 17 J a n u a r y

m u c h l i k e a n i m a l s in a z o o , is c o n s i s t e n t w i t h t r e a t i n g w o m e n a s e q u a l human beings is d o u b l e t h i n k of the greatest proportions. However, most offensive of a l l , I t h o u g h t , is t h e w a y that M r P e a r c e r a i s e s t h e 'moral' question, s u g g e s t i n g , by i m p l i c a t i o n s , that p e o p l e o p p o s e d t o H o n P o r n night are s o m e s o r t of s e l f - r i g h t e o u s p u r i s t s , w h o are a g a i n s t t h i s ' n a t u r a l a c t ' . I n d e e d if Mr P e a r c e t h i n k s that H o n P o r n night has any c o n n e c t i o n with a natural a c t t h e n I w o n d e r at w h a t s t a g e he d r o p p e d B i o l o g y at s c h o o l ? A s a m a l e s t u d e n t at I C I am a s h a m e d to be associated with people w h o exploit s u c h false r e a s o n i n g to s u p p o r t their actions. Yours faithfully Mark Harman Comp 2

• ' T o d i p o r not to d i p - b u t whats t h e question Harry Hamlet Palmer. • A d d i n c h e s ! ! to y o u r private parts!! with I C C . 'Its brill', s a y s M i s s Satisfied M e m b e r , ' M i n e s w e l l e d a n d s w e l l e d a n d my b r a just kept c o m i n g off.' • ' W e l l m i n e s still s m a l l ' A u n t y a d v i s e s 'get a hair cut'. • O n e h u n d r e d a n d o n e u s e s of a dead C h i l l i . C o n t a c t M P r i c k s o n , C h e m 3. • P r i c k s o n — b e w a r e the k n a c k e r c r a c k e r ; S A E is not a m u s e d . • J J r u n , r u n , shit, shit, s l o p p y sloppy. • M M keep your door locked. •I want m y E 2 m a n — u n r e q u i e t e d lover wait until y o u ' r e p i s s e d then you'll be mine. • I C M C Expedition meeting. ' F i n s b u r y P a r k - o r S t a n s if it's wet 86' Members wanted-must climb M o d S&B and Y H A accepted. • S & B E x p e d i t i o n meeting we're still A r g u i n g 83, 84, 85, 8 6 . B r o w n i e s accepted. • H a r l e y : Y o u ' v e h a d m y black tights for over t w o m o n t h s — p l e a s e , please c a n I have t h e m back, lots of love K. • M a s s a g e P a r l o u r o p e n i n g o n 61 l a n d i n g t o p l e s s m a s s e u r s £10 per half hour. P l e a s e p h o n e for a n appointment. S E R V I C I N G & REPAIRS at

RICKY'S GARAGE (Personal service guaranteed.)

I* QUEENS GATE PLACE MEWS. SOUTH KENSINGTON. LONDON S W.7 T«l:0l»l ISM

ENDSLEIGH INSURANCE SERVICES LIMITED 71 O l d Brompton R o a d South Kensington London SW7 3 J S Telephone 01-589 6783 FELIX


Electric Cell A f t e r 20 y e a r s of campaigning the Elec Eng d e p a r t m e n t is t o get a c o m m o n room. Students agreed to give up s o m e l o c k e r s p a c e s o that t h e ground floor locker room could be carpeted and furnished. N o date has been fixed yet for an o f f i c i a l o p e n i n g but this is e x p e c t e d t o o c c u r after t h e i n s t a l l a t i o n of a c o f f e e m a c h i n e , in e a r l y F e b r u a r y . Guilds President Roger Preece, himself an electrical engineer, said that, until n o w , t h e r e h a s b e e n n o real m e e t i n g p o i n t for s t u d e n t s in t h e d e p a r t m e n t , apart f r o m '3 c h a i r s i n t h e foyer'. H e a d of Elec Eng Professor Mayne said the room was a 'welcome addition'.

M r P r e e c e h o p e s this will be a n i n c e n t i v e t o o t h e r departments to provide a meeting place for students

Important Engagement Union Receptionist Kathy Tait and R a g C h a i r m a n J o h n Ingham were engaged whilst spendin g a month's holiday in the B a h a m a s . T h e y have n o immediate p l a n s , but e x p e c t t o m a r r y w h e n J o h n , at p r e s e n t in t h e t h i r d y e a r of h i s Chemical Engineering c o u r s e , g a i n s his d e g r e e .

Doors A n d Devils M o s t p e o p l e k n o w the o l d problem where you're trying to e s c a p e from Hell, you c o m e to two doors, y o u k n o w that o n e l e a d s t o f r e e d o m , a n d that o n e l e a d s t o a f i e r y pit. O u t s i d e the d o o r s are t w o d e v i l s , o n e w h o a l w a y s lies a n d o n e w h o a l w a y s tells t h e t r u t h , but y o u d o n ' t k n o w w h i c h is w h i c h . B y a s k i n g o n e q u e s t i o n o n l y to o n e of the devils, y o u have to find the correct d o o r to g o through. The correct q u e s t i o n t o ask of e i t h e r d e v i l is: 'If I a s k e d t h e o t h e r devil w h i c h was the correct d o o r to g o t h r o u g h , w h a t w o u l d he s a y ? ' N o matter w h i c h devil y o u a s k , it wil l indicate the w r o n g door. T h i n k a b o u t it!

M i d l a n d B a n k wil l b e donating c o m p u t e r s to the Computing Department for u s e by u n d e r g r a d u a t e s . It a d i s t r i b u t i o n of c u r r e n t that is just t h e a d d i t i o n of the t w o p r e v i o u s c u r r e n t distributions. (The two s o l u t i o n s are ' s u p e r p o s e d ' ) . We've now essentially solved the problem. Consider applying a v o l t a g e of + 1 V at a n y p o i n t on the grid. Because the g r i d is e x a c t l y s y m m e t r i c a n y c u r r e n t that f l o w s m u s t h a v e t h e s a m e v a l u e in all 4 d i r e c t i o n s (there c a n b e n o p r e f e r e d d i r e c t i o n ) C a l l this c u r r e n t I.

N o w c o n s i d e r a slightly harder p r o b l e m . Firstly t h e r e is o n l y o n e devil w h o not o n l y m i g h t b e a t r u t h teller o r liar, but m a y s o m e t i m e s lie a n d s o m e t i m e s tell t h e t r u t h . S e c o n d l y t h e r e are m o r e FELIX

than 2 doors, 4 say, and only one leads to escape... Y o u may only ask one q u e s t i o n a n d t h e devil c a n indicate one door only. A l s o t h e whole q u e s t i o n m u s t a p p l y t o t h e d e v i l (ie y o u c a n n o t ask q u e s t i o n s of t h e t y p e 'If y o u a r e a liar a n s w e r t h i s w a y , b u t if y o u are a truth teller a n s w e r this way.'). W h a t is t h e q u e s t i o n ? T h e best e n t r y s u b m i t t e d b y 1:00pm T u e s d a y 28th will r e c e i v e a £5 p r i z e .

-ti

, i

Electric nightmare-Solution T h e p r p b l e m , if y o u remember, was to find t h e effective resistance a c r o s s o n e r e s i s t o r of a n infinite, square, grid of o n e - o h m r e s i s t o r s . T h e key t o t h e p r o b l e m is that O h m ' s law, V = I R , is l i n e a r (ie V is p r o p o r t i o n a l t o I). T h u s if V =UR, and V = l R then (V* +Vb)=(U+lh)R, o b v i o u s , hey? Any two solutions can be a d d e d together to form a t h i r d s o l u t i o n (this is k n o w n as 'linear s u p e r p o s i t i o n ' in t h e technical lingo, and can be appliad to any linear e q u a t i o n ) . T h i s m e a n s that for a f i x e d r e s i s t o r n e t w o r k , if a p p l y i n g a certain voltage p r o d u c e s a d i s t r i b u t i o n of c u r r e n t s , a n d a p p l y i n g a different v o l t a g e at a different p l a c e produces a second d i s t r i b u t i o n of c u r r e n t s , then applying both voltages at t h e s a m e t i m e p r o d u c e s

A

b

b

P r o p o s a l s have been put forward by C o l l e g e to move t h e F E L I X O f f i c e f r o m its p r e s e n t p o s i t i o n , at t h e e n t r a n c e to Beit Q u a d , t o the kitchen area behind the U n i o n L o u n g e . T h e extra s p a c e g e n e r a t e d w i l l , if t h e p r o p o s a l s are i m p l e m e n t e d , be used for offices and seminar r o o m s by t h e College. FELIX Editor Hugh Southey and Union P r e s i d e n t C a r l B u r g e s s wil l be d i s c u s s i n g the p r o p o s a l s with C o l l e g e Secretary J o h n Smith today.

a

mEeflBRflin J u d g i n g by t h e n u m b e r of e n t r i e s w e ' v e h a d I'm s u r e y o u ' r e a l l just d y i n g t o k n o w the s o u l t i o n to 'Electric Nightmare'. A d m i t t e d l y it w a s a d i f f i c u l t p r o b l e m , but I w a s d i s a p p o i n t e d that n o b o d y even attempted a solution. O h well, w e saved o u r s e l v e s five p o u n d s a n y w a y ! T h e full s o l u t i o n is given below.

Going Underground

i n

N o w take the adjacent point and c o n s i d e r exactly the o p p o s i t e s i t u a t i o n ie a p p l y — 1 V a n d a c u r r e n t of -I wil l f l o w .

i

ri

T h e s e are the t w o s o l u t i o n s that w e 'superpose' together. W h e n w e d o t h i s w e get t h e s o l u t i o n f o r a 2V v o l t a g e difference applied across the o n e resistor.

tJ I Jlv I

21

4T h e c u r r e n t s in t h e r e s i s t o r a d d t o g i v e 21. L o o k i n g at t h e r e s i s t o r alone w e have 2V a c r o s s a o n e - o h m resisitor w h i c h i m p l i e s 1=1 A . N o w l o o k i n g at t h e w h o l e g r i d , t h e t o t a l c u r r e n t f l o w i n g into a n d o u t o f t h e g r i d is 4 I = 4 A .

Friday 17 J a n u a r y

h a s b e e n r e p o r t e d that t h e b a n k f e e l s that t h e g o v e r n m e n t is u n d e r i n v e s t i n g e n o u g h in universities.

Nicaragua Appeal The Socialist Society c o l l e c t e d £10.76 f o r the W o r l d U n i v e r s i t y S e r v i c e at Tuesday's Union General M e e t i n g . T h e W U S will use the m o n e y f o r the p u r c h a s e of a t r u c k w h i c h w i l l b e fille d w i t h e d u c a t i o n a l materials, including typewriters, duplicators and microscopes, for universities in N i g a r a g u a . S o c s o c wil l b e l e a v i n g a c o l l e c t i o n t i n in t h e U n i o n Office for any further donations. T h e v o l t a g e d i f f e r e n c e is 2V a n d thus the effective r e s i s t a n c e is > o h m , a n d that's t h e a n s w e r . 2

Revolution Last week we a s k e d y o u to see how many words you c o u l d f o r m f r o m t h e letters of t h e w o r d ' R e v o l u t i o n ' . W e used as our definition of a v a l i d w o r d a n y t h i n g that a p p e a r s in t h e S h o r t e r Oxford English Dictionary. This produced a plethora o ! strange words which w e h a v e n e v e r h e a r d of b u t , s u r e e n o u g h , w e r e in t h e dictionary. W e also had several people w h o had used computer dictionaries to f i n d their w o r d s . W e are g l a d t o s a y that n o n e of these entries w o n or even c o u n t e d in t h e t o p few! T h e entrant with the most w o r d s c l a i m e d to have f o u n d 3 1 4 . W e h a d to disqualify s o m e o ' these as they were not w o r d s but letters, p r e f i x e s , s u f f i x e s o r a b b r e v i a t i o n s (eg. e, v, I O U , oo, eo). O f t h e 250 w e c h e c k e d , s o m e were very weird. E x a m p l e s i n c l u d e : vlei — South. African word for a h o l l o w in w h i c h rain c o l l e c t s ; levin — (flash of) lightening; heroli — e s s e n t i a l o i l f r o m f l o w e r s of bitter o r a n g e u s e d in perfumery. C o n g r a t u l a t i o n s to S a l l y M c L e a n — please c o m e to c o l l e c t y o u r £5 p r i z e f r o m the F E L I X O f f i c e after Monday lunchtime. C o n g r a t u l a t i o n s also to H u g h S t i l e s f o r w i n n i n g £5 for t h e c r y p t i c c r o s s w o r d .

I I*


Whenever you criticise the superheroes who make up the FELIX staff, y o u s h o u l d k e e p in m i n d that y o u a r e p r i v i l e g e d to r e c e i v e free o n e of the best s t u d e n t m a g a z i n e s on the market. I n o w feel a b l e to m a k e t h i s c l a i m as I h a v e h a d a l o o k at s o m e of t h e s o - c a l l e d 'competition'. Queen Mary College Student Union h a v e a n organ called Cub. Last term t h e y w a s t e d a t h i r d of a p a g e r a n t i n g a b o u t the l o s s of t h e i r w r e t c h e d m a s c o t M a r y w h i c h w a s s t o l e n by I m p e r i a l ' s o w n Royal College of Science (it makes you proud, doesn't it!). T h e y b e g g e d for i n f o r m a t i o n l e a d i n g to t h e a b d u c t i o n of e i t h e r the R C S U m a s c o t T h e t a or the I C U m a s c o t M i k e , but s i n c e T h e t a a n d M i k e are b o t h still s a f e a n d s o u n d , w e c a n s e e that their c a m p a i g n h a s been marvellously unsucessful. Mind you, what c a n y o u expact from QMCII Y o u m i g h t t h i n k that the Royal College of Art w o u l d b e a b l e to p r o d u c e a w e l l d e s i g n e d , w e l l laid out, a n d a r t i s t i c p u b l i c a t i o n , e v e n if on a shoestring budget. Dodo Express, t h e n e w R C A S U m a g a z i n e not o n l y d i s p e l s the m y t h that a r t i s t s h a v e a n y i m a g i n a t i o n or s t y l e , but a l s o h a s the d u b i o u s d i s t i n c t i o n of m a k i n g Guildsheet l o o k l i k e the Financial Times. T h e lousy illustrations, boring layout, a n d infantile m a t e r i a l s u g g e s t to m e that the Dodo Express staff spend too m u c h time painting nude models, and really n e e d to get their teeth i n t o a g o o d p r o b l e m sheet. Of c o u r s e the magazine was printed on trendy recycled paper, and I s u p p o s e that's w h a t counts!? University College is t h e b i g g e s t c o l l e g e in L o n d o n U n i v e r s i t y . I f i n d it s t r a n g e t h e n , that Pi is s o b a d l y p r o d u c e d . In a f e a t u r e t h e y did on student m a g a z i n e s , they c l a i m e d that t h e y w e r e the o n l y s t u d e n t n e w s p a p e r in L o n d o n that c a m e out

e v e r y w e e k — this, a s e v e r y FELIX r e a d e r k n o w s , is a n u n t r u t h , a lie, a n d c o u l d a l m o s t be d e s c r i b e d as libellous. They also said that t h e y w e r e o n e of t h e f e w s t u d e n t m a g a z i n e s to be p r o d u c e d internally a n d p r o c e e d e d to u s e t h i s as a n e x c u s e f o r the fact that PI is s o u n a t t r a c t i v e to l o o k at. FELIX is i n t e r n a l l y p r o d u c e d , a n d it l o o k s g o o d , a n d o u r n e w s is u p to d a t e . In t h e i r 'feature', PI p l a y e d t h e d i r t y t r i c k of u s i n g o u r m a s t h e a d in t h e i r article without actually saying anything about our p a p e r , t h u s t a r r i n g us w i t h t h e s a m e b r u s h as t h e other papers without s l a g g i n g us off o v e r t l y ( b e c a u s e t h e y k n o w that PI w o u l d n ' t h a v e a l e g to s t a n d o n if t h e y t r i e d t o s l a g us off). T o b e blunt, PI, t h o u g h it h a s alot of g o o d points, has a very unprofessional look about it: t h e l a y o u t is c h i l d i s h a n d s l i p s h o d a n d it's u s e of t h e E n g l i s h l a n g u a g e is not impressive (considering that t h e y h a v e an E n g l i s h d e p a r t m e n t ) . PI h a s g r e a t p o t e n t i a l , but o n l y if t h e staff s t o p b e i n g s o b l o o d y complacent!!

London Sudent, t h e n e w s p a p e r of the University of London Union is t h e only publication besides FELIX w h i c h I C U g i v e s o u t . F o r t u n a t e l y , I c a n n o t f i n d it in m y heart to s a y a n y t h i n g n a s t y a b o u t this n e w s p a p e r . It is t o o b o r i n g for w o r d s . W h a t c a n b e more boring, for instance, than having T o n y S p e n c e r , I C U ' s Rag Mag e d i t o r , o n t h e front c o v e r ! H o p e f u l l y , London Student wil l d i s a p p e a r into o b l i v i o n , thus saving the editors the e m b a r a s s m e n t of b e i n g a s s o c i a t e d w i t h t h e least r e a d a n d least i n t e r e s t i n g n e w s p a p e r in L o n d o n . National Student, o n t h e o t h e r h a n d , is a great l a u g h . (It b e l o n g s to t h e N a t i o n a l U n i o n of S t u d e n t s to w h i c h , as y o u m a y k n o w , w e h a v e r e f u s e d to p a y lots of m o n e y to join.) W h i l e t r y i n g to imitate p o s y m a g a z i n e s like The Face it s u c c e e d s o n l y in l o o k i n g l i k e a p o o r relative, a m e r e s h a d o w of t h e real t h i n g . I C s t u d e n t s are a c t u a l l y e x p e c t e d to p a y for t h e o p p o r t u n i t y to fill in a questionnaire with q u e s t i o n s a l o n g t h e l i n e s of ' w h a t d o y o u t h i n k is t h e M o s t F a b T h i n g or P e r s o n in t h e w h o l e w o r l d ' . I w o u l d

s u g g e s t that this p u b l i c a t i o n b e a v o i d e d — if y o u w a n t to b u y a p o s y m a g a z i n e b u y The Face, Cosmopolitan, or Avant Garde... at least t h e y h a v e t h e i r own s t y l e (so I'm told). O f all t h e s t u d e n t p a p e r s I l o o k e d at, t h e Birmingham Sun w a s t h e m o s t f a s c i n a t i n g . In t h r e e s u b s e q u e n t issues they had t h r e e different e d i t o r s : a r a c i s t B a n g l a d e s h i ; a lefty lesbian (she a p p o i n t e d o n e p e r s o n for n e w s a n d f e a t u r e s t o g e t h e r , but t w o w o m e n ' s editors); a n d the mysterious Colin Reed who didn' t e v e n m a n a g e to p r o d u c e a full i s s u e . T h e i r s t y l e s d i f f e r e d as m u c h as t h e i r staff d i d (you c a n s e e from the credits w h o was w h o ' s friend) a n d t h e s h e e r bitchiness w h i c h must have r i d d l e d their o f f i c e m u s t h a v e b e e n a j o y to b e h o l d . . . the knives were certainly b e i n g s h a r p e n e d at A s t o n . A n y w a y , b a c k to IC g o i n g s o n next w e e k . . . if y o u p r o d u c e the g o o d s . I w a n t lots of b a c k b i t i n g , bitching, and general nastiness. Please. W e l l , lots of l o v e k i d s . . . a n d r e m e m b e r : FELIX is t o o g o o d to risk.

by Felicity the Catty

FELIX


Computers That Can Taste And Smell Science the

Editor, D e b b i e

research

power

to

Wilkes

looks

into giving c o m p u t e r s

detect

at the

chemicals. Professor

Electrochemical sensors l o o k set to r e v o l u t i o n i z e m a n y a s p e c t s of i n d u s t r y , medicine, and agriculture. The sensors now being d e v e l o p e d have the ability to d e t e c t a s p e c i f i c c h e m i c a l s p e c i e s in a m i x t u r e , a n d to m e a s u r e its c o n c e n t r a t i o n s in real t i m e a n d real s p a c e a n d will g i v e m a n y different s c i e n t i s t s a m o r e p r e c i s e i n s i g h t into the s y s t e m s they work with. H e r e at I m p e r i a l C o l l e g e a great d e a l of r e s e a r c h is being directed to the d e v e l o p m e n t of n e w e l e c t r o c h e m i c a l s e n s o r s . In

the C h e m i s t r y D e p a r t m e n t , Professor John Albery's g r o u p are w o r k i n g o n a n u m b e r of n e w s e n s o r s that are d e s i g n e d to m e e t s p e c i f i c n e e d s in m e d i c i n e , agriculture, industry and even the police force. While in t h e B i o t e c h n o l o g y Centre Dr Tony Cass's g r o u p s p e c i a l i s e s in biosensors, which make u s e of t h e c a t a l y t i c a c t i v i t y a n d s p e c i f i c i t y of e n z y m e s . Electrochemical sensors are s o v a l u a b l e b e c a u s e they provide the most d i r e c t m e t h o d of transducing the

Albery's

c o n c e n t r a t i o n of a s p e c i e s into a n e l e c t r i c a l s i g n a l . T h e i r a c t i o n is really m a d e of t w o p a r t s : t h e s e l e c t i v e r e c o g n i t i o n of t h e s p e c i e s , a n d t h e p r o d u c t i o n of a s i g n a l r e l a t e d to that concentration. S p e c i f i c r e c o g n i t i o n is by n o m e a n s e a s y to a c h i e v e , and various methods can be used d e p e n d i n g on the target s' pecies . T h e m o s t widespread technique involves selective binding of t h e s p e c i e s . H o w e v e r , this requires a g o o d c h e m i c a l fit b e t w e e n t h e

•

~ The Literary Magazine of Imperial College Union

Comppse-a-poem or a story, draw a picture or take a-photogfaplf ~ It could win you

0

Submissions can be sent to the Phoenix Editor, Chris Edwards, via the F E L I X office or the Chemistry Undergraduate^ letter-racks.

Research

target s p e c i e s a n d r e c e p t o r . W h i l e t h i s c a n be a c h i e v e d for s o m e i o n s , w h e n m o r e c o m p l e x s h a p e s of target m o l e c u l e are involved, then t h e r e are s i g n i f i c a n t difficulties with d e s i g n and p r o d u c t i o n of r e c e p t o r s t r u c t u r e s of t h e right t y p e . H o w e v e r , by m a k i n g u s e of naturally o c c u r r i n g specific r e c o g n i t i o n , in p a r t i c u l a r e n z y m e s , scientists have b e e n a b l e to d e v e l o p h i g h l y selective new sensors. These sensors, formed f r o m t h e c o u p l i n g of natural m o l e c u l a r r e c o g n i t i o n with artificial t r a n s d u c t i o n , are c a l l e d b i o s e n s o r s a n d are p r o v i n g particularly potent w h e n a p p l i e d to b i o t e c h n o l o g i c a l processes, clinical medicine and agriculture. A n i m p o r t a n t a s p e c t of t h e u s e of e l e c t r o c h e m i c a l s e n s o r s is that t h e y a l l o w d e t e c t i o n of a s p e c i e s w i t h o u t t h e n e e d for separation, so making continuous monitoring p o s s i b l e . C l i n i c a l l y t h e fact that t h e y c a n be u s e d f o r r a p i d in v i v o a n a l y s i s is a major step forward. T h e y are a l s o r o b u s t , e a s y for u n t r a i n e d staff to u s e , a n d an e c o n o m i c a l l y viable a l t e r n a t i v e to e x i s t i n g analytical methods, which often i n v o l v e l e n g t h y laboratory analysis. H y d r o p o n i c s is a t e c h n i q u e w h i c h is b e i n g i n c r e a s i n g l y u s e d to g r o w a w i d e v a r i e t y of c r o p s . F o r example, glass house crops s u c h as t o m a t o e s a n d lettuce can be g r o w n using the nutrient film t e c h n i q u e . B y m a k i n g u s e of electrochemical sensors, Professor John Albery and Dr Barry Haggett have b e e n a b l e to d e v e l o p an automatic nutrient film analyser. With the nutrient film t e c h n i q u e t h e s o i l is Continued

FELIX

Friday 17 J a n u a r y

Group

on page

10


I Oh Christ! 'Christians need G o d b e c a u s e of i n s e c u r i t y ' , 'irrational superstitions', ' h y p o c r i t e s ' , t h e y b e l i e v e in a G o d of v e n g e n c e ' , ' C a n ' t think for themselves'. T h e s e are s o m e of t h e m a n y c r i t i c i s m s of c h r i s t i a n s . T h e y a r e true, o n e or o t h e r of t h e s e a c c u s a t i o n s a p p l i e s to d i f f e r e n t C h r i s t i a n s , but not just C h r i s t i a n s , but e v e r y b o d y . M o s t p e o p l e d o n ' t a c t in the w a y t h e y s a y a n d a lot of p e o p l e d o n ' t t h i n k f o r t h e m s e l v e s . It is w e l l k n o w n that m a n y p e o p l e f o l l o w t h e c r o w d . S o m e t i m e s , with C h r i s t i a n i t y it is e a s y to fall in to t h e t r a p of j u s t following what vicar s a y s but this is b e c a u s e c h r i s t i a n s are h u m a n a n d suffer f r o m t h e s a m e f a u l t s as other people.

'No T o m m y , it is N O T an early form of pocket calculator...'

Christianity is... C h r i s t i a n i t y is fundamentally based on just o n e c o m m a n d m e n t w h i c h is e x p r e s s e d in t w o

Philosophy Eli, Eli, L e m e sabachlthani?' (My G o d , m y G o d , w h y hast t h o u forsaken me?) These words of t h e d y i n g C h r i s t are a p o t e n t e x p r e s s i o n of h u m a n fear a n d a n g u i s h in t h e f a c e of d e a t h . A t t h e l o w p o i n t s in o u r o w n lives w e feel l o n e l y , d e p a y s e ' , i n c o m p l e t e a n d l o n g for reconciliation with another totally s y m p a t h e t i c p e r s o n , w e w a n t o u r lives to m a k e s e n s e , to be an e x p r e s s i o n of s o m e t h i n g t r a n s c e n d e n t a n d not m e r e l y self-

ways: 1) L o v e G o d 2) L o v e y o u r n e i g h b o u r T h i s is the b a s i s for all the C h r i s t i a n c h u r c h ' s t e a c h i n g . A d m i t t e d l y , often t h e w r o n g i m p r e s s i o n is g i v e n , it is e a s y to t h i n k that G o d is a r u t h l e s s t a s k m a s t e r r e a d y to z a p h i s followers. T h e r e are many philosophical arguments a b o u t t h e e x i s t e n c e of a l o v i n g G o d , but t h e s e a r e o n l y a i d s to b e l i e f — b e l i e f c o m e s from experience. I b e l i e v e t h e 4 9 b u s g o e s to Shepherds Bush G r e e n — b e c a u s e I've t r i e d it. F e w p e o p l e s t a y w i t h i n C h r i s t i a n i t y u n l e s s at s o m e s point they experience something w h i c h m a k e s t h e m stay t h r o u g h o u t d o u b t . It w o u l d b e e a s y to s h r u g t h i s off by, 'I've n e v e r e x p e r i e n c e d G o d — s o I needn't bother'. H o w e v e r , t h a t isn't f a i r — Y o u wil l n e v e r k n o w w h e r e t h e 49 b u s g o e s u n l e s s y o u try it. C h r i s t i a n d o c t r i n e s are no more incredible than s o m e of t h e t h i n g s t h e l e c t u r e r s tell us, a n d yet l e c t u r e n o t e s are often t r e a t e d as i n f a l l i b l e d o c u m e n t s . Is w h a t t h e y tell u s in l e c t u r e s a t r u e e x p r e s s i o n of reality o r is it just t h e i r p e r s o n a l v i e w ? C h r i s t i a n i t y is s o m e t i m e s c o n s i d e r e d to be as superstitious waffle—considering so m a n y p e o p l e s (past a n d present) have f o l l o w e d these c r a z y m o t i o n s they c a n ' t be that s i l l y . Rules, rules, rules! C h r i s t i a n s a r e not mindless morons who e n s l a v e t h e m s e l v e s to a set of r u l e s a n d c o d e s b e c a u s e t h e y c a n ' t t h i n k for sufficient. Blais e Pascal r e m i n d s m e that t h e v a l u e of all m y o t h e r l o n g i n g s lies in t h e i r r e f l e c t i o n of t h i s o n e o b s e s s i v e d e s i r e for s o m e t h i n g to c o m p l e t e us. B u t w e are l i v i n g in a n a g e w h i c h f i n d s it h a r d to m a k e a n act of faith a n d to r e a c h a n a w a r e n e s s of t h e p e r f e c t O t h e r . T h a t is not to s a y that p e o p l e d o not feel t h e p r e s e n c e of G o d . T h e y d o , but t h e y are i l l - p r e p a r e d to r e s p o n d to t h e s e promptings. T h e p r o b l e m is that w e have been dressing G o d up in c l o t h e s w h i c h d o not fit. M o d e r n s c e p t i c i s m has e x p o s e d t h e i n a d e q u a c y of

t h e m s e l v e s . O n e of t h e p r o m i s e s that J e s u s m a d e to his d i s c i p l e s is that h e c a m e to set p e o p l e free. L a c k of r u l e s is not freedom—that's anarchy, a n d w h o is free w h e n fear r e i g n s . D o not m u r d e r , r a p e ( e t c ) are all r u l e s but without them our society w o u l d c r u m b l e . I a m not s a y i n g laws are necessary to e n s u r e p e a c e . I a m not b e i n g f o r c e d to k e e p a n y r e l i g i o u s r u l e s — t h e r e is n o w a t c h f u l e y e r e a d y to z a p m e if I d e c i d e to r o b a b a n k o r j u m p into b e d w i t h a g i r l / b l o k e at e v e r y opportunity. I o b s e r v e rules b e c a u s e t h e r e are s o m e a c t i o n s that I b e l i e v e are not f o r m y o w n h e a l t h of s o u l a n d happiness. I freely d e c i d e to o b e y o r not to o b e y — w e l l not q u i t e freely. I still d o t h i n g s that I w i s h I didn't, usually b e c a u s e I felt like it. B u t to s a y 'I just felt like it' is r e a l l y a c o p out. W h a t I m e a n is; a part of m y s u b - c o n s c i o u s still d i c t a t e s w h a t I d o . I a m not f u l l y f r e e to d o w h a t I choose. Most people admire B i s h o p Tutu, Rev Martin Luther King and Mother T h e r e s e b e c a u s e of w h a t they have d o n e — t h i n g s whic h most people c o u l d d o , but d o n ' t . I d o u b t I c o u l d g i v e u p e v e r y t h i n g to s p e a k for a m i n o r i t y or h e l p t h e p o o r b e c a u s e I a m not 'free'. C h r i s t i a n i t y h a s h e l p e d me a n d m a n y o t h e r s t o b e freer, t o d o w h a t e v e r I c h o o s e . T h a t is part of w h a t J e s u s m e a n t w h e n he s a i d that he h a d c o m e to set m a n free. A d m i t t e d l y part of Christians' bad reputation is d u e to that s o m e w e l l m e a n i n g c h u r c h men have formalised precisely what is t h e b e s t w a y to act, c u t t i n g out h u m a n individuality. T h i s is a f a u l t of t h e i r s , not of C h r i s t i a n i t y .

o u r t r a d i t i o n a l i m a g e s of G o d : t h e g o o e y nativity s c e n e w i t h a b a b y l y i n g in a m a n g e r or that benevolent old gent with a s n o w - w h i t e b e a r d . . G o d is m u c h g r e a t e r t h a n that . E a c h of t h e f o u r g o s p e l s s e e s t h e life of C h r i s t f r o m a different perspective. E a c h of t h e f o u r e v a n g e l i s t ( b i b l e g o s p e l writers) h a s o n l y a partial p i c t u r e but out of t h e w h o l e a r i c h mosaic emerges. But before w e c a n know G o d w e m u s t c o m e to know ourselves. O n e criticism w h i c h can be l e v e l l e d at m o d e r n s c i e n c e is that it tries to e x p l a i n

Friday 17 J a n u a r y

To Be A Christian...

What's your G o d ? Everyone has a mixture of m a n y s u b c o n s c i o u s a n d conscious goals. Everyone h a s a set of r u l e s by w h i c h t h e y a c t — i f t h e y d i d n ' t they w o u l d never do a n y t h i n g . T h e s e g u i d e l i n e s wil l d e p e n d on what a persons g o a l s are. E f f e c t i v e l y , everyone has their o w n religion and worships various g o d s s u c h as; money, a g o o d job, recognition....The question is; w h a t ' s y o u r s !

T h e w o r l d is i n c r e d i b l y confusing. S o many ideas, political, humanitarian, s c i e n t i f i c or r e l i g i o u s are bandied around, each o f f e r i n g s o m e sort of i d e a l for life, t h a t it c a n b e v e r y d i f f i c u l t to f i g u r e out w h i c h , if a n y of t h e m , s h o u l d get o u r a t t e n t i o n . A d d to t h i s c o n f u s i o n t h e p r e s s u r e s of a c a d e m i c work, social activity, t h e n , (later o n in life, m a k i n g a c a r e e r a n d supporting a family and y o u m i g h t t h i n k it q u i t e a r e a s o n a b l e to s a y 'I h a v e n ' t g o t t i m e for G o d ' . A p a r t f r o m that m a n y p e o p l e s a y that t h e y a r e not t h e ' r e l i g i o u s sort', (If s u c h a p e r s o n exists I w h i c h very m u c h doubt) probably m e a n i n g that t h e i r c o n c e p t i o n of t h e a v e r a g e c h u r c h - g o e r is s o u n a t t r a c t i v e as to be a d e t e r r e n t to a n y f u r t h e r i n v e s t i g a t i o n of t h e r e l e v a n c e a n d t r u t h of G o d .

Overview of feature T h e s e five a r t i c l e s s a y little a b o u t t h e m u l t i t u d e of doctrines and theology c o n n e c t e d with C h r i s t i a n i t y . N o t h i n g in these articles would c o n v e r t a n y o n e — t h a t is not t h e p u r p o s e . T h i s f e a t u r e is a n a t t e m p t to a n s w e r ' W h a t m a k e s a C h r i s t i a n tick'. T h e c o m m a n d m e n t to l o v e G o d implies relationship, p o s s i b l e b e c a u s e (webelieve ) t h i s t r a n s c e n d a n t b e i n g b e c a m e s o m e o n e like us.

T h e 'I h a v e n ' t g o t t i m e for G o d ' s y n d r o m e is a d i s e a s e . If J e s u s r e a l l y w a s t h e S o n of G o d ; if he r e a l l y does make claims on our lives that n e e d to b e a n s w e r e d , t h e n it is i n f i n i t e l y m o r e i m p o r t a n t to t a k e t h e t r o u b l e to seriously investigate C h r i s t i a n i t y , t h a n to g o ' t o two parties this week rather than one. A s for the ' r e l i g i o u s sort', d o e s J e s u s fit t h e b i l l ? W a s h e wet,

If y o u ask s e v e r a l p e o p l e what a certain person they all k n o w is like, b e t w e e n them they c o u l d give y o u a fairly c o m p l e t e p i c t u r e of that p e r s o n . If y o u a s k j u s t o n e , t h e p i c t u r e wil l be dodgy. T h e same applies here, 4 p e o p l e from very different b a c k g r o u n d s give a n a c c o u n t of w h a t is a C h r i s t i a n . T h i s w a y t h e r e is a reasonable answer. Mark Alderton Elec Eng 3

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h u m a n b e i n g s in straightforward physical terms as c o m p l e x bundles of matter. B u t w e a r e not reducible to electrons, chemicals, psychological s t a t e s or s o c i a l r o l e s . T h a t is o n l y half t h e s t o r y b e c a u s e w e are a l s o u n i q u e persons who grow through relationships with others. Adelbert Stifler s u g g e s t e d that if w e t h o u g h t of e v e r y person as a precious gem s t o n e to b e t r e a s u r e d w e w o u l d c o m e to r e s p e c t their dignity. Is it that s o m e p e o p l e c a n n o t b e l i e v e o r that t h e y s i m p l y reject o u r r e p r e s e n t a t i o n s of G o d ? FELIX

M a n y of o u r i d e a s a b o u t G o d are f u z z y to s o w e c a n n o t a f f o r d t o sit b a c k o n o u r l a u r e l s . In o r d e r to a c q u i r e a better u n d e r s t a n d i n g of t h e m y s t e r i e s of life w e n e e d to f i n d t h e m , to a b s t r a c t o u r s e l v e s from the d e m a n d s of d a i l y life a n d d e v e l o p an inner quiet. • T h a t a l o n e is a s t e p forward. O n the other h a n d , a n g e r is a v e r y g o o d r e s p o n s e . A s in p e r s o n a l r e l a t i o n s , a n g e r is that o t h e r f a c e of l o v e a n d w h e r e it e x i s t s t h e r e is h o p e of e v e n t u a l r e c o n c i l a t i o n . It is indifference which closes the m i n d . FELIX



DUNCE CORNER

Knowing G o d loves us even wf>en we blow it. x

effeminate, easily i n f l u e n c e d , in n e e d of a c r u t c h , o n e for religious niceties....? When I was sixteen, I rejected what I had been t a u g h t at s c h o o l , a n d by my parents about G o d . I f o u n d I h a d n o e v i d e n c e for m y belief, a n d w i t h no f o u n d a t i o n it c r u m b l e d under testing. S o I started to l o o k for r e a s o n s to b e l i e v e . A s I l o o k e d I met p e o p l e w h o had d o n e the s a m e t h i n g a n d w h o s e lives had c h a n g e d on finding G o d . While I s e a r c h e d for G o d , J e s u s r e a c h e d out f o r m e , until after a p e r i o d of t i m e I k n e w that I b e l i e v e d that J e s u s w a s t h e S o n of G o d a n d had really c o m e to h e l p all of us. S o I d e c i d e d to f o l l o w h i s teaching and commit my life to H i m . I d i d not h a v e p r o o f in t h e m a t h e m a t i c a l s e n s e , rather s u f f i c i e n t e v i d e n c e t o t a k e a s t e p of f ait h. F a i t h is not m u c h more than acting on r e a s o n a b l e e v i d e n c e . A first t i m e jet p a s s e n g e r m a y be incredibly uncertain before flying despite ample e v i d e n c e that t h e p l a n e is v e r y u n l i k e l y to c r a s h . H o w e v e r , after a s u c c e s s f u l first f light , h e p r o b a b l y h a s m o r e faith in p l a n e s a n d m a y b e w i l l i n g to g o o n a slightly longer journey. A l l of u s e x e r c i s e faith in s o m e w a y every day.

M y faith in G o d m e a n s s e v e r a l t h i n g s . First of all I know G o d loves me personally despite my apparent insignificance and b e c a u s e of his i n f i n i t e p o w e r a n d perfect nature. I e x p e r i e n c e that l o v e e v e r y d a y in a n i n n e r p e a c e in m y heart a n d t h r o u g h a n s w e r e d prayer. Before c o m i n g to u n i v e r s i t y I s p e n t eight mont hs w o r k n g o u t s i d e of E u r o p e in a s m a l l t o w n , in t h e m i d d l e of w h a t s e e m e d like n o - w h e r e . E v e r y t h i n g w e n t w r o n g that c o u l d h a v e , yet, s o m e h o w , because G o d answered my prayers, I survived and eventually overcame the p r o b l e m s . S e c o n d l y , it m e a n s that b e c a u s e J e s u s Christ died s o m e h o w t a k i n g o n h i m s e l f all t h e p u n i s h m e n t for all t h e s i n s I have ever c o m m i t t e d or will c o m m i t , that I will be w i t h h i m after d e a t h . T h i r d l y it m e a n s that t h r o u g h t h e H o l y S p i r i t I'm not o n m y o w n t r y i n g to d o w h a t is right, b u t H e g i v e s m e i n s i g h t into w h a t is g o o d a n d w h a t is not, a n d p o w e r to d o w h a t is right.

G o d s p e a k s to us in different w a y s . P e r s o n a l l y , I feel c l o s e s t to h i m w h e n I a m e n j o y i n g t h e arts; reading a beautiful p o e m , g a z i n g at a n e n c h a n t i n g p a i n t i n g or l i s t e n i n g to m u s i c . It is t h e n that I e x p e r i e n c e m o m e n t s of c o h e r e n c e , f l e e t i n g but v e r y real a n d full of joy. It is t h e split s e c o n d before s u c h a m o m e n t that is c a p t u r e d by M i c h e l a n g e l o ' s f i n g e r of G o d a b o u t to a n i h i l a t e a listless A d a m . M a n y people t e n d to be s u s p i c i o u s of a n y k i n d of r e l i g i o u s e x p e r i e n c e , d i s m i s s i n g it as mere auto-suggestion. But H e c o u l d d e n y that w e are all m a d e to l o n g f o r

something or s o m e one c a p a b l e of a n s w e r i n g o u r inner needs. C S Lewis p e r c e i v e d t h e v a l u e of t h i s c r a v i n g w h e n he s a i d , ' O u r best h a v i n g s are w a n t i n g s . S o m e w h e r e deep within o u r h e a r t s lies a v e r y personal s e a r c h for G o d which keeps breaking through. Susan Connolly

T h r o u g h G o d t h e r e is purpose, peace, hope and e t e r n a l life. I b e l i e v e t h a t h e g i v e s a f r e e d o m a n d j o y in life that c a n c o m e f r o m n o other source. Andrew Pettman Chem Eng 4

Friday 17 J a n u a r y

A Liberal View The distinguishing f e a t u r e of l i b e r a l t h e o l o g y is it's r e l i a n c e o n t h e p o w e r of r e a s o n . I b e l i e v e that all o p i n i o n s are worth talking out, e v e n t h o s e of D o n Cupitt, w h o might believe in G o d but m i g h t not. R e a s o n o u g h t to r a p i d l y s o r t out t h e g o o d i d e a s from the bad o n e s . J u s t b e c a u s e l i b e r a l s rely o n r e a s o n d o e s not m e a n they are rationalists. After all, l o g i c is t h e m o s t s t e r i l e of t h e s c i e n c e s . A l l it c a n d o is to s h o w that a set of p r o p o s i t i o n s (if t h e y a r e e x p r e s s e d c l e a r l y ) d o not c o n t r a d i c t . T h e W o r l d ' s real problems involve finding w h e r e to start. T h i s is w h y J e s u s n e v e r wrote any b o o k s a n d never f o u n d e d a n y s c h o o l s of t h o u g h t . H e d i d not s e l e c t his followers by q u i z z i n g them o n their ideas about G o d , religion, morality or e c o n o m i c s he s i m p l y s a i d : 'Follow me'. H e h a d his p r i o r i t i e s right. H e t h o u g h t that doctrines were less important than people so he broke the religious rules w h e n t h e y hurt p e o p l e . H e t h o u g h t that t h i n g s w e r e less i m p o r t a n t t h a n p e o p l e , s o he s h o w e d p e o p l e that t h e y c o u l d live h a p p i e r lives if t h e y g a v e u p t h e i r h o l d on their p o s e s s i o n s . H e b e l i e v e d in L o v e a n d h e w a s p r e p a r e d to d i e r a t h e r t h a n e x p r e s s hate. T o d a y , w e h a v e to l o o k s e r i o u s l y at t h e example of J e s u s (the d o c t r i n e s a b o u t h i m t o o o f t e n dir.ict u s from following him). W o u l d o u r w o r l d be better if w e cared more about starving people than about defending ourselves with w e a p o n s w e d a r e not u s e ? W o u l d w e not b e a h a p p i e r p e o p l e if w e c a r e d m o r e about living a n d less about c o l l e c t i n g t h e g a d g e t s that characterise Western consumer societies? Would w e not b e a h a p p i e r s o c i e t y if w e t r e a t e d p e o p l e a s more important than bureaucratic rules? These are t h e sort of q u e s t i o n s w e h a v e to a s k if w e a r e to follow Jesus now. W e l o o k to his e x a m p l e , that tell us w h e r e to start. W e m u s t try to f o l l o w h i m b e f o r e it b e c o m e s worthwhile arguing about theology. Christianity has to be t r i e d to b e b e l i e v e d , it d o e s not h a v e to be b e l i e v e d to be t r i e d . Sfeve Chem

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Continued from page 7 r e p l a c e d by a c o n t i n u o u s l y flowing solution which c o n t a i n s the n e c e s s a r y nutrients. T h i s t e c h n i q u e has many advantages over more conventional methods of c r o p g r o w t h , in p a r t i c u l a r , as c r o p y i e l d s can be increased by as m u c h as t e n f o l d , m o r e ef f icien t u s e of g l a s s h o u s e s is p o s s i b l e . It a l s o a l l o w s for better c o n t r o l ? f plant growth, less trouble from pests, and a q u i c k e r turn round between crops. H o w e v e r , it is i m p o r t a n t that p H is c o n t r o l l e d , that the n u t r i e n t s o l u t i o n is replenished with iron, p o t a s s i u m , a n d nitrate i o n s as they are u s e d up by the p l a n t s , a n d that t h e b u i l d u p of u n d e s i r a b l e i o n s s u c h a s c h l o r i d e a n d s o d i u m is m o n i t o r e d the d e s i g n of the automatic nutrient film a n a l y s e r is b a s e d o n i o n selective electrodes. These use a carrier, impregnated in a m e m b r a n e , to b i n d t h e target i o n in the right s i z e d c a v i t y a n d t r a n s p o r t it a c r o s s the m e m b r a n e . F o r e x a m p l e , in t h e c a s e of pot as s iu m ions a naturally occuring compound v a l i n o m y c i n is u s e d . T h e p o t e n t i a l w h i c h is established a c r o s s the m e m b r a n e provides a direct m e a s u r e of t h e c o n c e n t r a t i o n . In the n e w s y s t e m a m i c r o c o m p u t e r is u s e d to c a l i b r a t e t h e electrodes, control the s e n s o r s , s a m p l e the nutrient, a n d a n a l y s e the data. A n important aspect of t h e s y s t e m is that it c a n be u s e d a n d m a i n t a i n e d by n o n - s p e c i a l i s e d staff. At p r e s e n t it is in u s e at t h e N a t i o n a l Institute of Agricultural Engineering and has s u c c e s s f u l l y monitored tomato crops throughout two growing seasons. An electrochemical s e n s o r d e s i g n e d to measure expired carbon dioxide has been developed by P r o f e s s o r A l b e r y , Humphrey Drummond, and B i l l Y o u n g in c o l l a b r a t i o n w i t h D r H a n of t h e Radcliffe Infirmary, O x f o r d . This sensor was produced to m o n i t o r p a t i e n t s in intensive care, a n d for use ; in t h e o p e r a t i n g t h e a t r e It m a k e s u s e of a t e f l o n ; membrane, which allows oxygen and carbon dioxide to p a s s t h r o u g h , to s e p a r a t e t h e e x p i r e d air f r o m t h e t h i n l a y e r of ; s o l u t i o n in w h i c h t h e electrochemistry takes place. B e c a u s e carbon

10

d i o x i d e is e l e c t r o c h e m i c a l l y s t a b l e to e v e n l a r g e v o l t a g e s (2-3v), t h e a c t i o n of t h e s e n s o r d e p e n d s o n r e d u c t i o n of o x y g e n to g e n e r a t e the h i g h l y r e a c t i v e superoxide ion, w h i c h then reacts with the c a r b o n dioxide. The concentration of c a r b o n d i o x i d e is t h e n calculated from the difference between the a m o u n t of s u p e r o x i d e generated and the a m o u n t r e c o v e r e d . T h i s c a n all be a c h i e v e d s o r a p i d l y that it is p o s s i b l e to d i s p l a y a b r e a t h by b r e a t h a n a l y s i s of expired carbon dioxide. By coupling enzymes with electrodes a very sophisticated and selective r e c o g n i t i o n c a n be achieved. Professor Albery a n d D r C a s s are w o r k i n g o n a n u m b e r of i m p o r t a n t new biosensors which take a d v a n t a g e of t h e c a t a l y t i c a c t i v i t y a n d s p e c i f i c i t y of enzymes. A n important breakthrough has been the t h e d e v e l o p m e n t of a b i o s e n s o r to d e t e c t a l c o h o l . T h e sensor, w h i c h has

b e e n d e v e l o p e d by Professor Albery, Dr C a s s and K S i m , s h o u l d find a p p l i c a t i o n in p r o c e s s c o n t r o l of f e r m e n t a t i o n , for c u s t o m s a n d e x c i s e to t e s t a l c o h o l c o n t e n t of s p i r i t s , a n d in t h e p r o d u c t i o n of a m o r e efficent b r e a t h a l y s e r f o r p o l i c e u s e . B u t its m a j o r i m p o r t a n c e lies in t h e f a c t that this a c t i o n is b a s e d o n t h e o x i d a t i o n of N A D H to N A D as t h e r e a r e o v e r 2 5 0 e n z y m e s that u s e t h e cofactor N A D / N A D H . This o p e n s u p t h e p o s s i b l i t y of constructing enzymes e l e c t r o d e s of this t y p e w i t h a w i d e r a n g e of applications. The alcohol biosensor t a k e s a d v a n t a g e of t h e c a t a l y t i c activity of t h e e n z y m e . A p i e c e of d i a l y s i s membrane, which allows t h e s u b s t r a t e (in t h i s c a s e a l c o h o l ) to p a s s t h r o u g h , is u s e d to trap t h e e n z y m e in a s o l u t i o n layer next to the electrode. The e n z y m e then a c t s a s a c a t a l y s t for t h e reaction between N A D and the substrate, p r o d u c i n g NADH. T h e e l e c t r o d e is m a d e of a strongly conducting o r g a n i c salt s p e c i a l l y c h o s e n by t h e t e r m , w h i c h a b s o r b s the e n y z m e o n its s u r f a c e , but m o r e importantly facilitates the o x i d a t i o n of N A D H to N A D .

e n z y m e at p r e s e n t u s e d in the s e n s o r s c o m e s f r o m beef heart, a n d is t h e o n e that is a c t u a l l y a f f e c t e d if the toxic g a s e s enter the body. However, the s e n s o r m i g h t b e r e q u i r e d to r e m a i n i n a c t i v e for l o n g p e r i o d s of t i m e b e f o r e it is n e e d e d , and the long term s t a b i l i t y of t h i s p a r t i c u l a r e n z y m e is p r o v i n g to be a p r o b l e m . S o the t e a m are l o o k i n g for other more stable naturally o c c u r r i n g e n z y m e s , o r at t h e p o s s i b i l i t y of g e n e t i c manipulation.

T h e r e s u l t is a s e n s o r w h e r e t h e c u r r e n t is d i r e c t l y p r o p o r t i o n a l to t h e c o n c e n t r a t i o n of t h e alcolol. T h e r e is a l s o a g l u c o s e biosensor, w h i c h has been d e v e l o p e d by P r o f e s s o r Albery , Dr C a s s a n d Derek C r a s t o n , that is of s i m i l a r d e s i g n to t h e a l c o h o l s e n s o r . H o w e v e r , it is based on the o x i d a t i o n / r e d u c t i o n of F A D H / F A D . R e c e n t tests of this s e n s o r , c a r r i e d out b y D r F i l l e n z at O x f o r d , h a v e s h o w n that it c a n b e u s e d to m e a s u r e b l o o d g l u c o s e levels in v i v o . S o it s h o u l d p r o v e e x t r e m e l y v a l u a b l e in t r e a t m e n t of d i a b e t e s , a s w e l l as for f e r m e n t a t i o n c o n t r o l , a n d tests o n m e a t freshness. The 'electrochemical c a n a r y ' , w h i c h is a b i o s e n s o r d e s i g n e d to d e t e c t t o x i c g a s e s s u c h as hydrogen sulphide and h y d r o g e n c y a n i d e , is a n o t h e r p r o j e c t that D r Cass and Professor Albery are collaborating o n , a l o n g with S S h i u . T h i s s e n s o r

Dr C a s s ' s group have also developed a paracetamol biosensor w h i c h is in t h e p r o c e s s of g o i n g into c o m m e r c i a l p r o d u c t i o n . T h i s is an extremely valuable sensor as it c a n b e u s e d by h o s p i t a l staff to r a p i d l y a s s e s s t h e e x t e n t of a n o v e r d o s e , s o h e l p i n g to s a v e lives. At p r e s e n t , t h e g r o u p are a l s o w o r k i n g o n s e n s o r s to m e a s u r e t h e e x t e n t of w a t e r p o l l u t i o n by insecticides.

s h o u l d p r o v e to b e e x t r e m e l y v a l u a b l e for u s e o n oil rigs, as well as for general environmental monitoring. At low c o n c e n t r a t i o n levels h y d r o g e n s u l p h i d e g a s is easily detectable b e c a u s e of its p u n g e n t o d o u r , but at h i g h e r levels it c a n n o t b e d e t e c t e d by s m e l l . T h i s is particularly a p r o b l e m for t h e oil i n d u s t r y , as oil often c o n t a i n s p o c k e t s of o t h e r g a s e s , a n d in t h e past a c c i d e n t s h a v e led to deaths from hydrogen sulphide poisoning. The Security Since

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Masquerading as a cassette pretending to be a set of pictures, the Meridians package has long puzzled pundits. Presented in a plastic wallet is a thinly disguised C60 music tape, along with 30-plus pages of propaganda and artwork from some of Britain's leading designers (below). The entire oeuvre is distributed by Rough Trade, perhaps a final gesture before all their artists defect to Virgin.

I c a n ' t i m a g i n e the b o r i n g , stoop-shouldered, dandruff-ridden Imperial lecturers even thinking a b o u t s o m e t h i n g as interesting as central h e a t i n g . H e n c e it c o m e s a s a bit of a s h o c k t o r e a d a book where some a c a d e m i c s think about s u c h youthful activities as s e x , a n d put t h o u g h t into action. T w o professors, one E n g l i s h and the other A m e r i c a n , s w o p jobs for six m o n t h s , a n d h a v e all s o r t s of m e r r y c a p e r s . Z a p p , t h e wised-up American, comes o v e r w i t h a p l a n e l o a d of pregnant w o m e n on their w a y to a n a b o r t i o n c l i n i c and ends up being attacked b y a f o r m e r h e a d of department who's escaped from a local lunatic a s y l u m . Philip, the quiet retiring E n g l i s h m a n , gets arrested for s t e a l i n g b r i c k s a n d h a s a B l a c k P a n t h e r in his o f f i c e . A d d to t h i s a L o t u s sports car, student activism, a drug crazed orgy and a radical phone-in radio p r o g r a m m e and the i n g r e d i e n t s are m i x e d f o r a feast of hilarity. It m a y s o u n d a bit i n c e s t u o u s for a P r o f e s s o r of m o d e r n E n g l i s h L i t e r a t u r e to w r i t e a b o o k about another two p r o f e s s o r s of E n g l i s h L i t e r a t u r e , but the t e c h n i q u e p a y s off to g i v e a b r i l l i a n t b o o k , w h i c h is o n e of t h e f e w I'd e v e r h a v e t r e a t e d m y s e l f to. P u b l i s h e d b y P e n g u i n , p r i c e £1.95.

e • K i s s Of The Spider Woman (or Kiss to its f r i e n d s ) is H e c t o r B a b e n c o ' s (Pixote) n e w f i l m of love a n d d e a t h in a political prison, based on the n o v e l by M a n u e l P u i g . Happily hetero William Hurt plays Molina, an American q u e e n j a i l e d for a c i v i l c r i m e , but s h a r i n g his c e l l with Valentin, (Raul Julia), a political prisoner under i n t e r r o g a t i o n by t h e Brazilian authorities. Molina's romantic stories gradually undermine his masculinity and poigniantly u n d e r l i n e his i m p o t e n c e in c a p t i v i t y , but his l o v e of t h e r e n e g a d e lies s i d e - b y - s i d e w i t h his i n t e n t i o n s : to inform on Valentin and s e c u r e his p a r o l e . Unfortunately, cross and d o u b l e - c r o s s m a r the s p o t l e s s s h e e n of t h i s FELIX

romantic movie. Puig's c h a r a c t e r s d e m o n s t r a t e the f u t i l i t y of m a l e a g g r e s s i o n with enchantment, and M o l i n a ' s v i o l e n t d e a t h is a s m u c h an u n c o m f o r t a b l e plot s h a p e r a s it is a b e t r a y a l of t h e s i n c e r i t y of the film. C l o s e y o u r e y e s f o r that bit. A real s w o o n i e . • T h e Scala, ( K i n g s C r o s s tube), L o n d o n ' s dingy, downbeat, non-smoking, (oh, the agony!) fleapit has two all-nighters for the weekend owls. O n Friday, The Mix s h o w s Grease, Yellow Submarine a n d Stop Making Sense s t r u n g t o g e t h e r by D . J . ' s H i d i a n d Polly. W i p e the sleep from y o u r eyes, take a deep breath a n d take the p l u n g e a g a i n f o r T h e Gay Movie Marathon, (Lonesome Cowboys, Fireworks, Querelle, Scorpio Rising,

Thundercrack, Un Chant D'Amour a n d Taxi Z u m Klo). B o t h e v e n t s start at 11.30, p r i c e £3.50 p l u s 3 0 p membership. •Every choice we make is important, we make the world what it is by our courage and cowardice, by our caring, by our greed and our apathy. S o s p e a k s M o n i k a , part of Siren Theatre's a c c l a i m e d r e - r u n of Pulp, a f e m i n i s t p i a y par excellence played by the renowned lesbian acting collective. B a s e d on the o r i g i n a l f i l m of t h e 50's of t h e s a m e n a m e , it b r o u g h t t h u n d e r o u s a p p l a u s e to t h e D r i l l H a l l in 1985 a n d p r o m i s e s a h i g h level of audience participation. Get i n v o l v e d : £2.50 f o r s t u d e n t s at t h e D r i l l H a l l , 16 C h e n i e s St, W C 1 .

Friday 17 J a n u a r y


Photosoc

Competition

M a y b e it's b e c a u s e t h e r e wasn't e n o u g h publicity that t h e r e s p o n s e to o u r magnificent photosoc FELIX Competition was so b a d . D o n ' t l a u g h , but w e o n l y got three entries. P a t h e t i c isn't It? B u t not to w o r r y ! If y o u are an undiscovered photographic g e n i u s (and I k n o w t h e r e are h u n d r e d s of y o u out there) t h e n all is not lost, b e c a u s e w e are g o i n g to have A N O T H E R C O M P E T I T I O N , this time with a small P R I Z E . All you n e e d to d o is s u b m i t a p o r t f o l i o of u p to f o u r b l a c k a n d w h i t e or c o l o u r p r i n t s (not s l i d e s ) to t h e F E L I X o f f i c e b e f o r e t h e e n d of term. T h e pictures can be of a n y s u b j e c t w h a t s o e v e r and any size. M e a n w h i l e h e r e are t h e r e s u l t s of o u r v e r y s m a l l Christmas competition. First: P i n g C h u a n g , second: H u g h R u b i n a n d third: Julian Shulman. Mr S h u l m a n submitted a very interesting portfolio c o n s i s t i n g of s o m e v i e w s of a s u b u r b a n h o u s i n g estate, a r a i n b o w , a cat w a l k i n g o n a garden fence and a small d o g in a n a r m c h a i r . H u g h Rubin's portfolio was

e x t r e m e l y g o o d . It c o n s i s t e d of a s e r i e s of B & W p r i n t s of s u p e r b quality and excellently c o m p o s e d . F o u r of t h e s e were particularly i m p r e s s i v e . It is u n f o r t u n a t e that y o u c a n n o t s e e t h e m , b e c a u s e t h e y r e a l l y are v e r y g o o d . It s e e m s to be t h e (almost ) u n a n i m o u s o p i n i o n of the F E L I X staff, h o w e v e r that P i n g C h u a n g ' s portfolio was the best, a l t h o u g h p e r s o n a l l y I prefer M r R u b i n ' s pictures. The photograph r e p r o d u c e d h e r e is a c t u a l l y a b o u t 12 i n c h e s by 16 i n c h e s a n d m o u n t e d in g l a s s . It is a m o n o c h r o m e print w h i c h h a s b e e n h a n d c o l o u r e d , a n d it m u s t be s a i d that the F E L I X p r i n t i n g d o e s not d o full j u s t i c e to it. S o if y o u are w o n d e r i n g w h y this p a r t i c u l a r p i c t u r e was c h o s e n , y o u must bear in m i n d that it l o o k s m u c h m o r e i m p r e s s i v e in real life. W e l l , that's all f o l k s ! R e m e m b e r that w e w a n t lots a n d lots a n d lots of e n t r i e s for the n e w c o m p e t i t i o n , s o get y o u r shutter fingers working o v e r - t i m e a n d let's s e e w h a t you can do. Howard Rudd Sailing

12

There is not much sport this week due to bad weather and all matches on Saturday and Wednesday at Harlington being c a n c e l l e d due to waterlogged pitches. H o w e v e r , the Evelyn Gardens football championships was decided.

A f t e r a n o t h e r ten m i n u t e s B S H winger Byron W o o d p i c k e d up t h e b a l l , p a s s e d a c o u p l e of b a c k s a n d s q u a r e d it to a w a i t i n g Steve J a m e s who calmly p l a c e d the ball o u t of t h e keeper's reach 2-1.

Bernard Sunley House m a i n t a i n e d their 1 0 0 % r e c o r d to w i n t h e E v e l y n Gardens Houses Championship. The traditional c r u n c h match between the two all-male h o u s e s in E v e l y n G a r d e n s , Bernard Sunley and H o l b e i n , settled the 85/86 championship A f t e r a fairly e v e n first ten m i n u t e s B e r n a r d S u n l e y tripped up when Scott G o r d o n p i c k e d u p t h e ball in the b o x a n d s l i p p e d it u n d e r the k e e p e r to g o o n e up. A l m o s t immediately f r o m the restart a l o n g ball f r o m just i n s i d e t h e half w a s m i s j u d g e d by the B S H keeper and b o u n c e d over his h e a d a n d into the b a c k of t h e net.

With Bernard S u n l e y now d o m i n a t i n g the g a m e the next g o a l w a s a surprisingly long time c o m i n g , but o n c e a g a i n S t e v e J a m e s m a n a g e d to out-fox the keeper a n d find t h e net. A b o u t five m i n u t e s b e f o r e half-time B y r o n W o o d b r o k e t h r o u g h o n t h e right w i n g a n d p l a n t e d o n e in t h e t o p left of t h e net. B S H t h e n h a d to a b s o r b s o m e pressure with R o b James, Laurence Covill and Andy Watson making a solid barrier, w i t h h e l p f r o m a still d r u n k M a r c u s Shepherd. I m m e d i a t e l y after halftime Steve Wilkinson p i c k e d t h e ball u p at t h e t o p of t h e b o x a n d b l a s t e d o n e past the k e e p e r to f i n d the g o a l .

B y r o n W o o d got t h e fifth t a k i n g it r o u n d t h e k e e p e r o n t h e e d g e of t h e b o x , then beating two defenders s t a n d i n g o n t h e line. With A n d y Watson jinking and jiving on the right a n d R o b J a m e s stopping anyone and a n y t h i n g o n the left B S H w e r e c o p i n g w e l l at t h e back. L a u r e n c e (Fog-horn) C o v i l l t o o k all t h e h i g h balls a n d c o u l d have s w a l l o w e d t h e ball if he h a d o p e n e d his m o u t h a little wider. Byron Wood completed his h a t - t r i c k to m a k e B S H 6-2 u p . H o l b e i n t h e n put the B e r n a r d S u n l e y goal under pressure with s o m e g o o d r u n s by A n d y K e e l i n and Scott G o r d o n . The B S H keeper redeemed h i m s e l f in part w i t h a c o u p l e of s a v e s a n d s o m e r a p i d h o o f i n g by M a l c o l m J o n e s , Lai Covill and Marcus Shepherd, who was s o b e r i n g u p by n o w but w a s not k e e n o n h e a d i n g , s a w B S H t h r o u g h to the final w h i s t l e .

Friday 17 J a n u a r y

Last Saturday the Imperial C o l l e g e S a i l i n g t e a m set off for t h e first m a t c h of t h e term against Bristol University. T h e first r a c e s a i l e d l o o k e d as if it w a s g o i n g to be a very c l o s e f i n i s h , w i t h s o m e very g o o d sailing c o m i n g from both teams, until t h e last lap w h e n t w o m e m b e r s of t h e o p p o s i t i o n d e c i d e d t o s h o w us t h e best w a y to s i n k a firefly. F o r t u n a t e l y the boa t w a s d r a g g e d to t h e s h o r e a n d e m p t i e d b e f o r e it s a n k completely. After l u n c h the r e s u m p t i o n of r a c i n g w a s d e l a y e d d u e to a s q u a l l p a s s i n g over, d u r i n g w h i c h v a r i o u s m e m b e r s of b o t h t e a m s set a b o u t d e m o n s t r a t i n g their capsizing skills. Not satisfied with this s o m e o n e tried s a i l i n g a w a y f r o m t h e jetty l e a v i n g half a tiller extension behind and almost collided with other b o a t s tied u p t h e r e . B y t h e e n d of t h e s q u a l l there were 4 boats, 6 helms a n d 5 c r e w s still r e a d y to sail. R a c i n g was then resumed, involving s o m e very competitive sailing w i t h all p r e v i o u s d u c k i n g s forgotten. FELIX


Wind Band F r o m this term o n w a r d s , t h e IC W i n d B a n d wil l be k n o w n as the IC C o n c e r t B a n d . T h i s n e w title is a n i n d i c a t i o n of t h e m o v e t o i m p r o v e t h e i m a g e of t h e b a n d , in o r d e r to i n c r e a s e the m e m b e r s h i p a n d the support. More challenging pieces of a g r e a t e r v a r i e t y t h a n b e f o r e wil l b e p l a y e d , d e t a i l s to be a n n o u n c e d later at t h e first r e h e a r s a l . T h e s e wil l i n e v i t a b l y require more practice , so just o n e c o n c e r t n e a r t h e e n d of e a c h t e r m is l i k e l y . In t h e W i n t e r a n d S p r i n g t e r m s , this wil l be i n d o o r s ! Only the traditional S u m m e r c o n c e r t wil l be o n the Q u e e n ' s L a w n . A c o m m i t t e e will b e f o r m e d in o r d e r to o r g a n i s e the c o n c e r t s , c h o o s e the p i e c e s to be p l a y e d a n d perhaps arrange some social events. It is h o p e d that t h e s e p r o p o s a l s will stir all y o u Brass, Woodwind and P e r c u s s i o n p l a y e r s out t h e r e into a c t i o n . A s b e f o r e , p l a y e r s of all s t a n d a r d s a r e w e l c o m e and no auditions are r e q u i r e d . T h e first of the regular M o n d a y evening rehearsals this t e r m is o n 20 J a n u a r y f r o m 5 . 4 5 p m to 7.15pm in t h e Great Hall.

SF T h e s u n , just past z e n i t h , beat d o w n u p o n t h e b l a z i n g s a n d s . H e c o n t r o l l e d the v e h i c l e w i t h a deft t o u c h , foot against the floor, p o n d e r i n g u p o n his journey's end. It w a s T h o r ' s d a y , a n d a bad day for travelling. T h e g o d of all e l e c t r i c s t o r m s frowned u p o n internal c o m b u s t i o n engines, they r e d u c e d t h e i m p a c t of his speciality. Even so Maximilian had to arrive at ' T h e B u i l d i n g ' and s o o n . Even now the d e n i z e n s of ' P s i p h i ' w o u l d be g a t h e r i n g , a n d M a x i m i a n w a s to a d d r e s s t h e m , to brief t h e m o n t h e d a r i n g e s c a p e that w a s to t a k e place on Sunday. O n the h o r i z o n , he s p o t t e d a dark s p e c k . U n d o u b t e d l y this w a s the r e m a i n s of t h e a n c i e n t c o m p u t e r centre. T h e 'Byte' building. FELIX

S u d d e n l y , f r o m t h e right h e s a w a f l a s h of light. A n o t h e r car! For a moment p a n i c f i l l e d h i m , but t h e n , as it d r e w n e a r e r , he r e c o g n i s e d it. It w o u l d be a d u e l to t h e d e a t h , but t h e puny Huellzok charabanc w a s n o m a t c h for his L a s l a r L y r i c o n c u s t o m job. The cars closed relentlessly, a shot ripped in to t h e e n g i n e c o u l i n g . M a x lifted a g r e n a d e in h i s right h a n d a n d w a i t e d . A s t h e c a r s c l o s e d he c a u g h t a v i e w of t h e driver. ' S t o m m ! It's R e x P e t e s , the man w h o drunk the b l o o d of S a t a m u s ! ' H e t h r e w t h e g r e n a d e , in his m i n d s eye, the parabolic arc, and the H u e l l z o k c o n v e r g e d at 1-10 and... A deafening explosion fille d t h e air. M a x c o v e r e d the r e m a i n i n g m i l e in s h o r t minutes and steered t h r o u g h the a r c h . H e ran up t h e f l i g h t s of s t a i r s a n d in to t h e g r e e n room. 'Hi C o s m i c ! ' C o s m i c just s m i l e d , took the blaster f r o m b e h i n d his b a c k a n d l a s e d M a x in t h e c h e s t . ' D o n ' t w o r r y M a x . It"s not s o m u c h a n after life, m o r e s o r t of a n a p r e s vie!'

Picocon 15 F e b Games, Videos, Plays, of Honour and much

Films, Guest more.

Ind Soc Well Happy New Year and w e l c o m e b a c k to I n d u s t r y Y e a r . W e start t h e t e r m w i t h a C h e e s e a n d W i n e party this l u n c h t i m e w i t h J o h n G a r n e t t , D i r e c t o r of t h e Industrial S o c i e t y . For t h o s e of y o u w h o r e f u s e to r e a d p o s t e r s it's at 1 2 . 4 0 p m in t h e U n i o n U p p e r D i n i n g H a l l . E v e r y o n e is w e l c o m e : it's free o n p r o d u c t i o n of y o u r m e m b e r s h i p c a r d . If y o u m i s s e d t h e last o n e d o n ' t m i s s this!! T h i s is f o l l o w e d next W e d n e s d a y 22 by a Business G a m e organised by S h e l l . A n y o n e i n t e r e s t e d should contact Hubert O ' H a r a , P h y s i c s 3, w i t h a £3 r e t u r n a b l e d e p o s i t . T h i s event i n c l u d e s a free buffet. Other events this month i n c l u d e t r i p s to, B r i t i s h S t e e l o n t h e 22 a n d R o l l s R o y c e C a r s o n t h e 29 J a n u a r y . A l s o o n t h e 28 S c h i s i t z e r wil l be c o m i n g to t h e C o l l e g e for a s p e a k e r meeting. For more information read y o u r newsletter—Se e y o u there!!

Model Aircraft ' H a l l o a n d w e l c o m e to t o d a y ' s e d i t i o n of Blockbusters. Today we have J i m from L o n d o n g o i n g for t h e g o l d run—take y o u r place on the hotspot, please!' T A S B Please Bob' 'When and where do I C M A C meet?' 'Thursdays Above Southside Bar' 'Correct' 'HPT please B o b ' 'At w h a t time do ICMA meet?' 'Half Past Twelve' 'Correct' 'N Please B o b ' 'Are I C M A C meeting this Weekend?' 'Yes?' 'No' ' P a s s — I C M A C please B o b ' 'Imperial C o l l e g e ' s most prestigious Club' 'Imperial College Mooney Appreciation Circle' 'No' 'I c a n m a k e A i r c r a f t C r a s h ? ' 'Near e n o u g h — a n d , yes we have—Blockbusters!'

Barn Dancing Soc T h e Imperial C o l l e g e B a r n Dancing society doesn't e x i s t ! (groan..) B a r n D a n c i n g , t h o u g h , lives a n d t h r i v e s at I m p e r i a l C o l e g e s (hooray...) W H A T IS B A R N D A N C I N G ? A s a r e c e n t c o n v e r t to the activity I c a n understand the apprehensions and m i s c o n c e p t i o n s that lie in t h e m i n d s of I m p e r i a l College students. Fundamentally and e s s e n t i a l l y B a r n D a n c i n g is a s i m p l e a n d f u n activity. N o e x p e r i e n c e o r talent is r e q u i r e d , just a c a n d i d a n d l i g h t - h e a r t e d a p p r o a c h to entertainment. A band plays cheerful, bouncy music and the caller skilfully manipulates the a t m o s p h e r e to c r e a t e a lively, i n t i m a t e c o m m u n i t y .

You've witnessed the Guilds carnival, you've heard the B o o m a l a k a r e s o u n d in u n l i k e l y p l a c e s , but n o w f o r s o m e t h i n g c o m p l e t e l y different...'The Valentine's Barn Dance'. E s c a p e from the stifling city h a s s l e to t h e c a n d i d a n d l i g h t h e a r t e d s pir i t of the country. Don't be one of life's s p e c t a t o r s j o i n in a n d make fun o n F r i d a y , 14th F e b r u a r y at t h e Holland Club 'Barn'. The tickets are obtainable from t h e G u i l d s U n i o n O f f i c e at a b a r g a i n p r i c e of £2.00. BE THERE OR BE SQUARE!

Q\

"

Guilds

A b i g t h a n k y o u to everyone w h o helped with t h e c e n t e n a r y c o c k t a i l party at t h e e n d of last t e r m . It was a tremendous s u c c e s s d u e to F r a n k M i l l a r ' s o r g a n i s a t i o n a n d all t h e hosts' hard work on the n i g h t . L e t t e r s of t h a n k s h a v e b e e n p o u r i n g into t h e o f f i c e f r o m m a n y of t h e g u e s t s , a n d c a n b e r e a d by a n y o n e w h o is i n t e r e s t e d . T h e r e are still t i c k e t s a v a i l a b l e for t h e D i n n e r a n d D a n c e o n t h e 31 J a n u a r y w h i c h wil l b e s u p e r b , o v e r 200 p e o p l e have already s i g n e d up, s o c o m e and j o i n in t h e c e l e b r a t i o n . T h e other major event this t e r m is t h e V a l e n t i n e B a r n D a n c e w h i c h wil l t h i s y e a r be o n , g u e s s w h a t , t h e 14th of F e b r u a r y . A live five p i e c e b a n d wil l be l e a d i n g t h e e v e n i n g g i v i n g full i n s t r u c t i o n s . Guests from local women's hostels and nursing c o l l e g e s wil l e n s u r e a n e v e n b l e n d of t h e s e x e s . Tickets on sale soon. T h i s T u e s d a y 21 is t h e G e n e r a l C o m m i t t e e at 6 . 0 0 p m f o r 6 . 1 5 p m f o r all Dep Reps, S o c Reps. Society Chairman and o t h e r i m p o r t a n t p e o p l e in the u n i o n .

Applications are closing today for

Friday 17 J a n u a r y

SUB WARDEN Holbein House Contact the Warden 13


c

S u n d a y

~

1030h

1230h Union Upper Lounge Orienteering Club. M e e t i n g to o r g a n i s e travel arrangements for the weekend. 1245h Southside Upper Lounge Yacht Club Meeting t o o r g a n i s e racing crew a n d d i s c u s s w e e k e n d trips for this term. Court Volleyball Basketball s h o o t i n g practice. For all players; to t e a c h b e g i n n e r s h o w to shoot a n d help more e x p e r i e n c e d players improve their shooting. 1300h Union Building Islamic Society c o n g r e g a t i o n a l prayer. Beit Gym Keep Fit Please bring suitable clothing a n d j o g g i n g shoes. 1830h

Concert Hall Opsoc setbuilding. A n y o n e w h o is interested in st agin g show welcome, members especially.

SDR Arts and Science Lodge Dinner B A B (Bring a B o a z ) . Contact B Ward. 2030h Southside Bar Southside Bar D i s c o

S a t u r d a y

1000h Concert Hall Opsoc setbuilding. A n y o n e w h o is interested in staging show welcome, members especially.

14

Physics L T1 'Wells Centenary Lecture' D r M i c h a e l Draper s p e a k s to W e l l s o c on 'Wells a n d H u x l e y ' at the R o y a l C o l l e g e of S c i e n c e . 2000h Junior Common Room Beginners Dancing C l a s s

Bot Zoo Common Room Christian Union Meeting Southside Gym Imperial Workout wear something comfortable and any type of training shoe . A t o w e l / e x e r c i s e mat is also useful. 1830h Union Gym Judo training. A n informal session 1900h

More House, 53 Cromwell Road Catholic Soc Mass A l l w e l c o m e f o r reflection a n d worship.

T u e s d a y

301m/999KHz IC Radio Roundtable. H u g h Stiles a n d the 'wonderful' Q u e n t i n F o n t a n a look at the w e e k s news release. 1930h

1300h Senior Common Room Wargames Meeting. 10-15% d i s c o u n t available on g a m e s . M e m b e r s h i p £1.50. 9 Princes Gardens Islamic Society prayers 1630h Union Gym Wu Shu Kwan K i c k the boring S u n d a y habit, literally! Learn to look after yourself a n d enjoy fitness with IC K u n g Fu C l u b

1800h More House, 53 Cromwell Rd. Mass and talk. A T D : 4th World', a talk a n d video by A i l i s h S c o t t volunteer w o r k e r with A T D

1230h J a z z Room Jazz Club General Meeting A l l welcome—especially Chem 231 Catholic Society M a s s , l u n c h and people. Quiet after q u a n t u m theory, transistors etc. E v e r y o n e w e l c o m e .

Southside Upper Lounge Scout and Guide lunchtime butties

1230h

Southside Upper Lounge Waterski Club. C o m e a l o n g and s i g n u p for W e d n e s d a y and Saturday trips.

130011 9 Princes Gardens Islamic Society prayers Beit Gym Keep Fit Please bring suitable clothing a n d j o g g i n g shoes.

9 Princes Gardens Islamic Society prayers

Volleyball Court Basketball training f o r first and s e c o n d team m e m b e r s .

1400h

1745h

Concert Hall Opsoc rehearsal

Greaf Hall Wind Band rehearsal

Room 2E, ULU ULU Gay and Lesbian meeting 2115h Weeks Hall ICCAG S o u p Run, tea, soup a n d meeting L o n d o n ' s d o w n and outs.

W e d n e s d a y

1245h JCR Chinese Chess. C o m e a n d play W e i - Q i a n d X i a n g - Q i , also k n o w n as ' G o h ' in J a p a n e s e and ' B a d u k ' in Korean. All welcome.

TV Lounges STOIC s p e c i a l feature broadcast

Southside Upper Lounge Hang-gliding meeting

Volleyball Court Basketball beginners training.

Union Upper Lounge Audio S o c i e t y b u y y o u r d i s c o u n t records, order today, c o l l e c t T h u r s d a y .

1300h

M o n d a y

1730h 1300h

TV Lounges STOIC for the latest C o l l e g e and C i t y news

1130h

Volleyball Court Badminton Club. E v e r y o n e welcome.

1900h

1800h

1930h 1000h Sherfield Consort Gallery Chaplaincy c o m m u n i o n service

T o d a y

1800h Southside Gym Keep Fit Please bring suitable clothing a n d j o g g i n g shoes.

Southside Lounge Boardsailing Club. R e g u l a r meeting to o r g a n i s e W e d afternoon trips. M e m b e r s h i p £4. Southside Lounge Q T stunt c o o r d i n a t i o n meeting 9 Princes Gardens Islamic Society prayers 1315h Read Theatre, Sherfield Humanties Lecture: ' N e u r o t i c Illness a n d their Treatment—Modern D e v e l o p m e n t s ' by Prof H a n s E y s e n c k of Department of P s y c h o l o g y , T h e Institute of Psychiatry 1730h Brown Committee Room Amnesty International Meeting.

Friday 17 J a n u a r y

1230h Life Sci G1L Cathsoc lunch group. 8e/f Gym Keep Fit Circuits. Free to m e m b e r s of IC K e e p Fit C l u b . M e m b e r s h i p £1 1300h Above Southside Shop Micro Club. A l l m e m b e r s have all a c c e s s to o u r computers and word p r o c e s s i n g facilities. M e m b e r s h i p £2. Southside Gym Keep Fit Please bring suitable clothing a n d j o g g i n g shoes. SCR Wargames meeting 9 Princes Gardens Islamic Society prayers Lower Union Lounge Caving Club meeting 1315h Brown Commitee Room Rubber/Duplicate Bridge 9 Prince's Gardens (basement) Islamic teachings c o u r s e series D: M u s l i m Beliefs. FELIX


It is my deep suspicion that when the b o m b finally drops a n d leaves a p o p u l a t i o n o f c o c k r o a c h e s with a lifetime supply of m e d i u m rare h u m a n that somewhere a m o n g the ruins there will still be a c o m p u t e r sending out unwanted mail shots. Picture the scene as two yu p p ie c o c k r o a c h e s sit breakfasting o n fillet o f chartered accountant a n d o p e n i n g endless offers

for the WHICH 'Guide to Back Pain, and how to inflict it'. Sick? W e l l in an infinite universe anything is possible, even a planet where people indulge i n S & M p o r n o g r a p h y while 70 governments indulge in institutionalised torture. M a y b e y o u need a sick m i n d to survive i n a sick w o r l d . Students in particularly, seem tostretch the limits of h u m a n sensibility in search o f diversion a n d entertainment. S o this week it seemed a neat idea to check out some o f the g o o d honest gore o n offer.

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i

A s A l b a n i a n m o u n t a i n cyclist E u g e n e Z h o g once said 'A its punctures o f a different ki nd (ie. in the head) that have the same effect for various r a n d o m s in the film Re-Animator which opens o n J a n 17th at the O d e o n K e n s i n g t o n a m o n g other places. T h i s is g o i n g to be a cult f i l m . Its based o n an H . P . L o v e c r a f t b o o k a n d oozes z o m b i e s , m a d scientists a n d death (temporary only). If c u l t / g o r e films are what y o u crave, the place to remember is the Scala c i n e m a near K i n g s C r o s s . T h e y have regular re-runs o f all sorts o f cult a n d 'art' (ho! ho! we know what they mean) films, a n d also S a t u r d a y all-night screenings o f multiple bills which are extremely g o o d value. T h e y ran showings o f The Evil Dead as part o f a c a m p a i g n against its b a n n i n g o n video last year.

puncture can really fuck up your day'. W e l l

F o r all y o u telly fetishists the controversial bit o f the B B C 2 thriller Dead Head is screened next W e d n e s d a y . M e a n w h i l e if y o u want so met h i ng which will really freak y o u out, the

d o c u m e n t a r y Silent Twins ( B B C 2 , S u n d a y 10.10-11.40) is an eerie story about two twins now in B r o a d m o o r psychiatric p r i s o n . T h i s unfortunately clashes with Spitting Images and so will p r o b a b l y be missed by most people. L o o k i n g a r o u n d at what we watch for entertainment leads one to reflect that I C R a g M a g s are pretty tame stuff-not so m u c h evil as b o r i n g

1400h

Union Upper

Mech Eng Foyer Make Kids Toys for handicapped children

Audio Society c o l l e c t today records ordered o n T u e s d a y .

1800h Union Dining Hall Guilds Gen Com A l l D e p Reps, Society Chairman, S o c R e p s and other p e o p l e to attend 1900h

Lounge

Mines B303 Scout and Guide s l i d e s h o w . 1245h

1330h

JCR Chinese Chess. C o m e a n d play W e i - Q i and X i a n g - Q i , also k n o w n as ' G o h ' in J a p a n e s e and ' B a d u k ' in Korean. All welcome.

Lounge Jazz Club New Year Hop Free b o o z e o n c e in, live C o l l e g e bands, d i s c o , 50p d i s c o u n t from U n i o n Refectory. £2.50 in advance, £3.00 o n the d o o r

JCR Sherfield North American Stall Information on B U N A C w o r k and play in U S this s u m m e r .

Junior Common Room Advanced Dancing C l a s s

1300h

Greaf Hall IC Orchestra Rehearsal 2000h Junior Common Room Medals Dancing C l a s s

Thursday 1230h Huxley 413 Methsoc A d i s c u s s i o n o n 'The C h u r c h and V o c a t i o n ' FELIX

Green Committee Room-Top floor of Union building SFSoc Library meeting. A c c e s s to the S F S o c library of over 1000 titles, p l u s discussion and organisation of future events.

Southside Lounge Riding Club meeting

Union SCR S C A B meeting: S C A B estimates—all C h a i r m a n a n d Treasurers please attend. TV Lounges STOIC W a t c h N E W S B R E A K for the latest C o l l e g e and C i t y news. Southside Upper Lounge Balloon Club meeting. 9 Princes Gardens Islamic Society p r a y e i s

Music Room, 53 Prince's Gate Concert J u d i t h Hall and T i m o t h y W alker p l a y i n g w o r k s by Ibert, G i u l i a n i , Villa L o b o s a n d Walker. 9 Prince's Gardens Quranic Recitation 1730h Aero 254 Gliding Club Meeting. A r r a n g i n g lifts to L a s h a m , videos & films. 1745h Mech Eng 342 Imperial College Choir. Rehearsal. 1800h

TV Lounges STOIC specia l feature programme Southside Gym Imperial Workout wear s o m e t h i n g c o m f o r t a b l e and any type of training shoe. A t o w e l / e x e r c i s e mat is also useful. 1830h Union Gym Judo Coaching Session. Instruction from B J A resident a n d guest instructors. A l l welcome, especially beginners. 60p mat fee. 1900h JCR Dancing C l u b Intermediate

1930h Music Room, 53 Princes Opsoc rehearsal

Gate

2000(1 JCR Dancing C l u b B e g i n n e r s

SCR Beit White Bordeaux Tasting. White deux Mers, G r a v e s etc and those s p e c i a l S a u t e r n e s he Q u e e n ' s favourite! A l l at the u n d e r b e l i e v a b l e price of o n l y £3.00 m e m b e r s , £4.00 n o n members

Friday 17 J a n u a r y

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r A report in last Wednesday's G U A R D I A N r e v e a l s that a G o v e r n m e n t ' c o v e r u p ' h a s r e s u l t e d in t h o u s a n d s of m i s i n f o r m e d students c l a i m i n g benefits to w h i c h t h e y w e r e n o t entitled. The mistake occurred when Social Services Secretary M r Norman Fowler released premature i n f o r m a t i o n to t h e p r e s s o n half of t h e D e p a r t m e n t of Health and Social Security, announcing changes which w o u l d have allowed students under covenant to claim supplementary benefit d u r i n g t h e s u m m e r v a c a t i o n . In fact, t h e s e n e w regulations were withdrawn in late N o v e m b e r , a f e w days before they were d u e to be p a s s e d by p a r l i a m e n t . M r F o w l e r c h o s e not to i s s u e a n o t h e r s t a t e m e n t .. a n n o u n c i n g the postponement, informing o n l y h i s staff of t h e c h a n g e , via an internal circular. T h i s

S S S t u d e n t s will l o s e u p to £1100 through being unable to claim supplementary and housing benefit o v e r t h e s u m m e r holidays, claims N U S vice president Vicki Phillips. O n e result of t h i s is that m a n y s t u d e n t s m a y h a v e tc g i v e u p their c o u r s e s . The Government e x p l a n a t i o n f o r t h e c u t s is the h i g h a d m i n i s t r a t i o n c o s t s of r u n n i n g t h e benefits. A c c o r d i n g to the G o v e r n m e n t for s u p p l e m e n t a r y b e n e f i t s of £4 m i l l i o n , a d m i n i s t r a t i o n cost were £2 million, a n d for h o u s i n g b e n e f i t s of £5 million, £3 million were spent on administration. T h e N U S v i c e P r e s i d e n t is e n c o u r a g i n g s t u d e n t s to w r i t e letters of p r o t e s t to MPs. F r i d a y 24th J a n u a r y h a s been designated a local d a y of prot es t o r g a n i s e d by the N U S , w h i c h a l s o p l a n s a m a s s l o b b y of M P s o n F e b r u a r y 12th. • 2 4 t h January, 12.30pm Mech Eng foyerJC Union leaflet prot es t at H a r r o d s B e t h e r e or b e s q u a r e ! 16

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r in effect, m i s l e d S t u d e n t s into b e l i e v i n g that t h e y c o u l d receive this benefit o n t o p of their p a r e n t s ' convenant payments. W h e n q u e s t i o n e d by FELIX, a Senior D H S S Official denied the G U A R D I A N ' S allegation that t h e w i t h d r a w a l c a m e a b o u t b e c a u s e of d r a f t i n g e r r o r s of t h e t y p e t h a t l e d to last y e a r ' s ' B o a r d a n d l o d g i n g s ' c o u r t c a s e , in w h i c h a n o t h e r set of D H S S regulations were deemed i l l e g a l by t h e C o m m o n s Statutory Instruments Committee. A l t h o u g h these latest r u l e s still a w a i t c o n f i r m a t i o n to b e c o m e part of t h e benefit c h a n g e s r e p o r t e d in last w e e k ' s issue, the official a s s u r e d F E L I X that a l l s t u d e n t s w h o mistakenly c l a i m e d have actually been reimbursed by special payment. H e could, however, find 'no apparent reason' for Mr Fowler's action.

A p r o p o s a l w h i c h a i m s to e n c o u r a g e tie c l u b m e m b e r s to w o r k in t h e Union bar on weekdays was given unanimous s u p p o r t at M o n d a y s Internal S e r v i c e s Committee. T h o s e present at t h e m e e t i n g i n c l u d e d Carl Burgess, Dave Kingston, Quentin Fontana, a n d M o o r e Lyttle the U n i o n Bar Manager. Quentin F o n t a n a h o p e s that t h e tie c l u b s will t a k e to d r i n k i n g in t h e b a r a s a result of t h e move. He denied the s u g g e s t i o n that o r d i n a r y s t u d e n t s w i s h i n g t o w o r k in t h e b a r w o u l d b e p l a c e d at a disadvantage. Pete W i l s o n IC U n i o n W e l f a r e O f f i c e r is w o r r i e d that t h e r e w o u l d b e f e w e r bar sessions available for ' o r d i n a r y s t u d e n t s ' , a n d is a l s o c o n c e r n e d that t h e b a r will b e c o m e inevitably tie club orientated.'

Going Through The Motions The A U T Strike, a c a d e m i c affairs a n d N i c a r a g u a n c o f f e e w e r e d i s c u s s e d at a lively U n i o n G e n e r a l Meeting (UGM) on Tuesday. The venue was, u n u s u a l l y , C i v E n g 201 after it w a s d i s c o v e r e d o n M o n d a y that t h e G r e a t H a l l h a d not b e e n b o o k e d . The meeting voted o v e r w h e l m i n g l y to s u p p o r t the A U T strike a n d r e q u e s t e d s t u d e n t s not t o attend lectures o n Wednesday morning. Full d e t a i l s a p p e a r e d in a s p e c i a l s t r i k e i s s u e of FELIX on Wednesday. E a r l i e r in t h e m e e t i n g , President Carl Burgess was repeatedly questioned about the proposed move of t h e F E L I X O f f i c e to t h e kitchen behind the Lounge. H e m a d e it c l e a r that h e w a s s y m p a t h e t i c to t h e latest in a l o n g l i n e of J o h n S m i t h i m s p i r e d s c h e m e s to take over U n i o n C o n t r o l l e d areas. S e v e r a l c h a n g e s to t h e Union B y - L a w s were approved. T h r e e related to the c r e a t i o n of a p o s t of Women's Officer and setting up a B a r C o m m i t t e e to o v e r s e e t h e m a n a g i n g of the n e w l y U n i o n - c o n t r o l l e d Bar.

Following the A U T D e b a t e t h e s e c o n d part of T a y l o r ' s a c a d e m i c affairs motion was passed. This m e a n s that t h e U n i o n h a s comprehensive polices on t h e i s s u e that affect it's m e m b e r s e v e r y d a y life. T h e meeting then moved o n to d i s c u s s w h e t h e r t h e Union Snack Bar should serve N i c a r a g u a n coffee. Proposer Pete H o b b i s said that t h e m o n e y r a i s e d by t h e s a l e of t h e c o f f e e w o u l d g o to h e l p p a y f o r education, which was badly affected by the civil war and the U S embargo on trade. T h e coffee w a s onl y a little m o r e e x p e n s i v e t h a n that t h e S n a c k B a r currently used, amounting to o n l y o n e p e n n y p e r c u p . Deputy President Dave Kingston o p p o s e d the m o t i o n , s a y i n g that d e c i s i o n s affecting the m a n a g e m e n t of U n i o n T r a d i n g activities s h o u l d not b e m a d e by U G M s , e v e n if t h e i n t e n t i o n w a s to support a good cause. T h e m o t i o n w a s then a m e n d e d to f r o m a r e q u e s t to s e l l t h e c o f f e e , but M r K i n g s t o n w a s still o p p o s e d to it. However , o n the vote the motion received a substantial majority.

Friday 17 J a n u a r y

In a n o p e r a t i o n i n v o l v i n g half a d o z e n v e h i c l e s at 1.30 o n W e d n e s d a y afternoon local police and units from the D i p l o m a t i c Protection Branch (DPBS) g a v e c h a s e to t w o b u r g l a r y suspects driving a builders van. T h e suspects were a l s o p u r s u e d by a m e m b e r of t h e p u b l i c in a B M W 3 1 6 w h o h a d interrupted their a t t e m p t to c o m m i t a b u r g l a r y in P a d d i n g t o n . The B M W paused on Prince C o n s o r t R o a d to take o n board a police m a n before resuming chase. The Diplomatic Protection Branch became involved when D P B officer Police C o n s t a b l e Fuller, on d u t y o u t s i d e t h e Iraqi embassy, sighted the burglar's van speeding down Queen's Gate on the w r o n g s i d e of t h e r o a d . The chase ended when the m e n a b a n d o n e d t h e i r v e h i c l e in P a l a c e G a t e . During the c h a s e the Diplomatic Protection Branch and local police d i s c o v e r e d that their r a d i o e q u i p m e n t w o u l d n o t let them c o m m u n i c a t e directly a n d w e r e f o r c e d to relay all messages via two p o l i c e m e n s t a n d i n g in t h e street, o n e e q u i p p e d w i t h a D P B issue radio a n d another with the normal variety.

T Four students yesterday w e n t into t h e U n i o n S n a c k b a r a n d ate a s l a p - u p m e a l at a c a n d l e l i t t a b l e s e r v e d by a waiter. T h e diners, b e l i e v e d to b e m e m b e r s of QT, c o m m e n t e d on the h i g h q u a l i t y of s e r v i c e 'Chez Norman'.

s r S t u d e n t s l i v i n g in h e a d t e n a n c i e s will not receive the bill for g a s a n d e l e c t r i c i t y u s e d in t h e first t e r m until t h e e n d of J a n u a r y . T h i s is b e c a u s e of a fault in t h e s o f t w a r e of the S t u d e n t S e r v i c e s computer. Finance Assistant Dave Parry r e c o m e n d e d s t u d e n t s to put at least £ 3 0 a s i d e to c o v e r t h e bill. FELIX


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