“I will not regret the past, nor wish to shut the door on it” November 28, 2012 | Last Updated on Friday, 17 May, 2013 15:29 I remember a time in my life when I was happy. It was a long, long time ago and feels like it happened to a person far, far away. This was a time before I was really conscious of the consequences of my actions. It was a time before I really knew what life was like. Before I had experienced anything of real life and my days were consumed with finger painting and naps. When saltine crackers and peanut butter were the best foods in the world. I want so much to go back to that time and become that person again. To not have any of the complications that come with age. The responsibilities that come with independence. The wounds that from come society and the scars that come from trauma. I want the peace that I had in my childhood. That sense of security that I had before the abuse. Except that can never be. Those times are gone and cannot be regained. All I can do is live with my actions and try to make the best of the life I have. I cannot live in the past and have to look to the future and try to make some new memories and have good times. What To DO To live in the moment is a skill I am learning but it takes time. To learn to look around me rather than ahead or behind. To let go of the past and not imagine the future, but be content with the world around me. To become a part of the moment and situation and not be filled with regrets. To stop re-opening old wounds and rubbing salt in them. To make peace with the fact that there are loved ones who I will never see again. That’s the hardest part, accepting that there are people in my life who I will never see again or speak to. To never have the chance to say the things I want to say. To not be able to let them know how I feel or how sorry I am for the things I may have said or done while they were alive. To wish I had spent more time with them while they were here. Where I Learned It I need to learn to let go of regret. To let go of the mistakes of my past. To learn from them so as not to repeat them. To let go of the past and not re-live it every day. These important things I need to learn are things I learned at Lifescape Solutions. I was taught coping skills and was introduced to AA which helps me deal with the concept of “we will not regret the past, nor wish to shut the door on it…” I am so grateful I was able to understand this concept and practice it on a daily basis.