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Issue 33 Wednesday 18.11.09

Comment & Opinion: The real price of organised bar crawls » p6

Life & Style: Careers, Cooking & Wine » ps 9 & 10

Films: The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus & Saw IV » p11

Students tell MPs “come clean on fees”

Anant Naik/RSU Ben Fishwick

Students from Portsmouth descended on London last Wednesday, the 11th, to get the government to ‘come clean on fees’. The recently announced review of the fees has angered many students as it brings the possibility of further increasing the already high sum that students have to pay. Wes Streeting, President of the NUS has argued that the government is attempting to avoid any backlash from student voters as the review is not due to finish until after the next general election. He went on to say: “If MPs

do not speak out against higher fees by signing this pledge, they will be named and shamed, and students in their constituency will be urged not to vote for them.” More than 60 MPs signed the pledge outside the protest against the fees. Mike Hancock MP, the MP responsible for Portsmouth South, has voiced his support for students that are protesting against a system that he admitted has: “failed students.” He is also an advocate of returning to a system that would provide students with maintenance grants. This would alleviate the pressure for students that have to

work whilst studying so that they can afford to live. He considers the city’s student population very important for the local area and is more than welcome to help any students that are having difficulty; he is currently battling to get two deposits back for University of Portsmouth students. When asked about his opinion on the justification for higher tuition fees for international students; he said that universities use these students as: “bums on seats.” Students that are not from the UK are charged significantly more than their UK resident peers. For example, international students taking a BA (Hons) Hospitality

Management course next year will be charged £10,500 for their first year, decreasing to £9200 for the second and third year. The university’s Vice-Chancellor, Professor John Craven, released a statement confirming that: “The University is not lobbying for a fees increase, but has to recognise that it is one potential way of offsetting public spending cuts, which we deplore.” Despite the fact that the university increased tuition fees for this academic year. This statement clearly indicates a backtrack on the Vice-Chancellor’s position of just eight months ago when he stated: “There’s a good reason for suggest-

ing a relatively modest rise to about £5,000.” (See  for full details)  The latest statement on the issue goes on to say that: “Any additional funding that we receive will be used to improve the student experience, and we will involve students in those discussions.” That said, last year saw a lack of student consultation in the redevelopment of the CO2 and Lux nightclubs. The most important question that needs to be asked if the fees increase is: how will the University justify it?

News » NUS

News » UPSU Media

Carnage criticised by MPs, NUS and the Police

Get involved

Sarah Morcom

Carnage has come under fire from the NUS, MPs and police after they label the organised pub crawls ‘degrading’. Unions from 17 universities have banned Carnage from promoting their events with five more soon following.  Outrage spread across the country after a drunk student was pictured urinating on a war memorial. 19-yearold Phillip Laing from Sheffield Hallam University now faces jail after pleading guilty to ‘outraging public decency’.   Vice-president of NUS, Richard Budden told The Observer: “There is an acute and real danger to students

who get caught up with these nights, not to mention the danger to members of the local population.” Carnage say they are committed to ensuring the safety of students. They claim on their website they ‘have operated the Carnage UK Student Event right across the country for almost half a decade without incident’.   Budden added: “An increasing number of campuses want to see the end of these events and are doing all they can to stop them by prohibiting ticket sales and banning all publicity. They take students on pub crawls that degrade the participants, put students’ welfare at risk and lead to antisocial behaviour. They make their money and then disappear, leaving

student unions, police, and sometimes even the hospitals to pick up the pieces.” Katie Taylor, a 2nd  year at Portsmouth said she loves Carnage: “It’s always a really good laugh, and probably one of my favourite nights out. I can understand that for some students it might affect their behaviour but surely any normal night out would do the same. I think to ban Carnage would be a really negative thing, it’s no different to a normal night out, same drinks, same clubs, just people wearing the same tops.”  She added: “Me and my friends absolutely love it and have never been involved in any problems with Carnage and the people who go to it.”  

Outrage spread across the country after a drunk student was pictured urinating on a war memorial

Want to get involved in Pugwash? We are currently recruiting - if you are interested at all, please email!

But Luke Hauser, also a 2nd year student, thinks Carnage can have different affects: “I’m worried about the fact that people who go to Carnage are herded about and so people drink quickly and that leads to them becoming drunk quicker.” 

We also desperately need Design Sub editors, to help us lay out pages and manage graphics and images. And we’re always looking for fresh writers too!

We are looking for: a Social Secretary, to stop us working too hard; a Societies Liason to help us support and promote societies; and a Web Manager to upload articles and look after the virtual aspect of UPSU’s print media.


Pugwash News Wednesday 18th November 2009



Photo of the Fortnight

Laura Patricia Editor

Melissa Flack L&S Editor

Philipp Geng Head of Design

Leila de Lara Jonny Rowe-Davison Arts & Entertainment Co-Editors

Ben Fishwick Head of News

Liam Ryder Sports Editor

Matt Blackall Grant Clarke Comment & Opinion Co-Editors

Emily Jane Smith Essentials Editor

Last week VIP volunteers collected litter on the seafront.

Sub Editors News: Amy Cox & Faye Joice C&O: Martin Thorpe & Jayna Zala L&S: Catherine Johnson & Hana McFaul A&E: Joe Adams, Bryn Etherington, Matthew Pilbeam, Sam Rhode & Dan Smyth

Sport: Hannah Barclay & Lucy Roberts Copy Editor: Yvonne EchebimaJohnson Design: tbc Marketing & Distribution: Milly “Vanilli” Youngman

Contributors Katie Anderson, Tash Alexander, Chris Batchelor, Jordan Byrne, Mez Eldridge-Tull, Cat Fyson, Wayne Gardiner, Steph Hall, Camilla Hoppitt, Anant Naik, Chris Mineham, Saraid Morgan, Sarah Morcom, Ben Norman, Ben Peddie, Will Preston, Tamsin Rowe-Davison, Sam Shulman, Lauren Smith, Emma Shillinglaw, Elaina Sperring, Ricky Sutton, Primrose Tricker, Niki Wakefield, Will Wells & Dan Whiteway.

Universities Round Up With thanks to: Chris Bleach, Marie Gomes, Luke Hauser, Freddy Hollis, Amy Johnson, Laura Jones, Ola Kosinska, Kerry Leadbetter, Jacob Leverett, Catherine Ng, Gamel Oki, Adam Paker, Beth Shephard, Katie Taylor, Steve Topazio, ‘Elgranto’, American Football, Canoe Club, Dodgeball, Netball, Rugby, Squash, Swimming & Wakeboarding.

Dates for the Diary Big Band Gig 8.30pm, 21st Nov – The Registry Gym & Tramp Bandeoke 22nd Nov – Walkabout It’s karaoke... with a band! Dodgeball Tournament 22nd Nov – Nuffield Sports Centre Deadline for Issue 34 Content Noon, 25th Nov email

Mexican Wave Flashmob 1pm, 25th Nov – Guildhall Square Come and join a Mexican wave on the steps to raise awareness about ‘The Wave’ climate march in December Choir Concert 7.30pm, 28th Nov – New Theatre Royal 4 guest soloists, Brahms & Schubert

Exeter University 15 students were scarred for life after using scalding-hot coat hangers to brand the initials of their former halls of residence onto each other. The ‘group challenge’ by Exeter University students involved the burning of the initials into chests, arms and thighs by holding the reshaped hanger against the skin for ten seconds. The entirely male group made the plan while sober, and all took part voluntarily. Three of the group were taken to hospital for treatment, and all have been told they will be scarred for life. A witness said the branded students were “shaking and gritting their teeth”.

Kent University Over half of the 236 female students questioned in a study at Kent said they knew someone who had had their drink spiked, and three-quarters identified drink-spiking as a more serious risk factor for sexual assault than alcohol or drugs. There has recently been a perceived rise in the use of ‘date rape’ drugs such as Rohypnol and GHB, with newspaper articles, soap opera story-lines and urban myths fuelling hysteria about drink-spiking. However, police reports have consistently undermined these misconceptions, with Detective Chief Superintendent Dave Gee, who conducted a study into drink-spiking in 2005, dismissing it as nothing more than an ‘urban legend’.

Keele University A student has realised the dreams of many renowned astrologers by discovering his own planet. David Anderson came across the planet during Keele’s ‘WASP South’ search. To his disbelief, he found the 17th new planet, coined, ‘WASP-17’, 1,000 light years away, in a “retrograde orbit”, being the first to orbit the wrong way around its host star - in opposition to the expected orbiting of the same direction that the star spins.

International An estimated 900 students are facing eviction from the temporary home in Jakarta where they have been living and studying. The students of Setia Christian College could be forcibly evicted within days. In recent weeks electricity and water have been disconnected and at least 17 students are on hunger strike. It is feared they may be forced to sleep on the streets if no suitable accommodation is found.

Oxford University The Conservative Party have offered their backing to a disgraced association of student Conservatives from Oxford. Following the telling of racist jokes at a drunken event, Oxford University Conservatives Association were banned from using the University’s name. However they have now been welcomed as an official branch of the party.

Newcastle University A controversial student who filmed two friends having sex at the university has had it passed off as art. Joseph Steele caused a stir with his 10 minute graphic film, shot on the day he learned of his degree results.

Pugwash News & Purple Wednesdays


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...that a young elephant seal is called a ‘weaner’ ...that journalists visiting Sesame Street are banned from asking Bert and Ernie if they are gay ...that lyrics from Jon Bon Jovi’s new album are framed and hanging up in the White House ...that a group of crows is called a murder ...that the name of the furniture polish “Pledge” means “piss” in the Dutch ...that tattoos can be done with a person’s ashes ...the spread of cupcake shops has been used to map urban gentrification in the US ...that there is a city named ‘Rome’ on every continent


Pugwash News Wednesday 18th November 2009


Tuition fees review More than a third of all sick leave is taken on a Monday, research suggests. The study, by consultant firm Mercer, also found that the highest rate of absence by far occurs in January. The most common reason for absence was musculo-skeletal problems, followed by viral infections and stress-related illness.

China is running a number of unlawful detention centres in which its citizens can be kept for months, according to campaign group Human Rights Watch. It says these centres - known as black jails - are often in state-run hotels, nursing homes or psychiatric hospitals. Among those detained are ordinary people who have travelled to Beijing to report local injustices. Officials have denied such jails exist, despite earlier reports on them in international and Chinese state media.

In a bad mood? Don’t worry - according to research, it’s good for you. An Australian psychology expert who has been studying emotions has found being grumpy makes us think more clearly. In contrast to those annoying happy types, miserable people are better at decision-making and less gullible, his experiments showed.

Russian President Dmitry Medvedev has called for profound reform of the economy in his annual state of the nation address. The Soviet model was no longer working, he said, and modernisation based on “institutions of democracy” was needed. “Instead of a primitive economy based on raw materials, we shall create a smart economy, producing unique knowledge, new goods and technologies, goods and technologies useful for people,” he said. A plan to erect what would have been the biggest statue of Pope John Paul II in the world has run into trouble. The 13.5m-high (45ft) statue, including plinth, was due to stand in a square in Chile’s capital Santiago. But the National Monuments’ Council refused to give the project its blessing, leaving the sculptor with nowhere to put the giant statue. The US ambassador in Kabul has written to the White House to oppose sending thousands more troops to Afghanistan. In a leaked cable, Karl Eikenberry said President Karzai’s government should first prove it would tackle corruption. The message arrived amid intense debate over strategy, with President Obama yet to make a decision on troop numbers. Catholic churches in Italy are installing automatic holy water dispensers to help reduce the risk of spreading swine flu. The outbreak of the H1N1 virus has led many churches to suspend the tradition of having holy water in open fonts into which people dip their hands. The new machine works like an automatic soap dispenser, squirting water when a hand is passed under the tap.

Anant Naik/RSU

Dan Whiteway & Amy Cox

The Government has launched its long awaited review of the top-up fees system for tuition fees in England, with ministers and student leaders warning to expect rises in fees. The review comes five years after the controversial top-up fees system was implemented with tuition fees potentially rising to £7,000 a year, more than double the current fee. Whilst the new system could see an increase in fees being conditional on the improvement of the quality of teaching, the National Union of Students (NUS) President Wes Streeting has expressed fears that this could create a 'market' of higher education, with top institutions charging the most, leaving poorer teenagers consigned to 'bargain basement' universities. He goes on to warn ministers against a ‘cosy stitch-up’ on tuition fees. He said it would be ‘totally unacceptable’ for the review panel to be filled with ‘Government patsies’ and individuals who want to see tuition

fees raised. Unfortunately this seems to be the case as leading academics, major public sector employers and even members of the NUS are merely consulted during the review. In a recent survey commissioned by the NUS, only 12% of the population want politicians to consider raising fees. Given this, a letter to the Guardian shows student leaders from over 85 UK universities have now vowed to name and shame MPs who are in favour of the rise or who continue their ‘consensus of silence’ until after the next election. The review may also axe the current system of heavily-subsidised student loans in favour of loans set at commercial interest rates, dealing poorer students another blow. The Universities UK body has pressured both the Labour and Conservative parties to sanction a significant increase in tuition fees, with a report published earlier this year saying fees as high as £5000 could be charged without affecting student recruitment, whilst the rector of the Imperial College London has called for a complete relaxation of fees, allowing universi-

ties to charge as much as £12,000. Streeting added: “Politicians should remember the student backlash in 2004 that almost brought Blair's government down and saw many pro-fees MP's lose their seats subsequently. There will be an even greater backlash if the review proposes plunging students into greater debt.” The review, headed by former BP chief executive Lord Browne, has three aims. First to make universities more accessible. Second, to examine the impact of fees on the families of student and the value to the taxpayer and thirdly to simplify the support system. Browne said: “The review comes at an important time and our task is a serious one: to make recommendations to secure the vitality of higher education in this country while ensuring that finance does not become a barrier to those who have the ability and motivation for further study.” To view the student union representatives already listed on the NUS pledge, visit:

A giant “digital cloud” that would “float” above London’s skyline has been outlined by an international team of architects, artists and engineers. The construction would include 120m- (400ft-) tall mesh towers and a series of interconnected plastic bubbles that can be used to display images and data. A Twitter feed featuring pearls of wisdom from a 73-year-old father could become a family comedy on US TV. Justin Halpern, 29, has become an internet star with more than 700,000 followers since he began posting his father’s often profane words of wisdom. A survey of the UK’s waterways called 2009 a “bumper year” for water voles, which had been considered to be one of the nation’s fastest declining mammals. The study, organised by British Waterways, recorded 89 sightings of the rare rodent - twice as many as in 2008. Rock star Sting has called the X Factor “televised karaoke”.

News » Politics

News » Competitions

MP brands students: ‘lazy’

Help shape the Olympics

Faye Joice

A Senior MP has caused major controversy by claiming British Students are lazy. The veteran chair of the commons education select committee, Barry Sheerman MP, has said: “too many students gain degrees, but cannot speak or write English properly”. This is said to be in relation to an effort to force students to work harder. Students have fought back against Sheerman, with the National Union Of Students releasing a statement saying he was: “out of touch” and that they reject his: “outrageous” remarks. Sheerman though, again trying to degrade students, shot back with an

attack on a ‘fair access’ policy. “Can we ensure that fair access means students are suitably qualified, that they can speak and write English properly and they can work a bit harder than the average student in our universities, who don't at this moment work hard enough?” Supporting the students, the NUS vice president Aaron Porter fighting back against Sheerman, saying that times had changed since the Huddersfield MP enjoyed a free university education in the 1960s. “Barry Sheerman is evidently out of touch,” he said. “Students are working harder than ever to earn their degrees. On top of this they are now working a record number of part-time

jobs to support themselves financially, thanks to the top-up fees policy which Mr Sheerman voted for.” “As chair of the select committee it is particularly outrageous that he should be making such a statement, representing a party that came to power with education as a top priority.” “Mr Sheerman should stop pontificating in the House of Commons and visit a university in his constituency so he can find out what life is actually like for students.” How hard do you work? Do you think students have it easy? Drop us a line at with your views.

Ben Fishwick

Deloitte, a business advisory firm, wants students from the University of Portsmouth to help shape the London 2012 Olympic and Paralympic Games. The firm wants students to come up with ways to help create a positive experience for different groups during the Games. This could be for a variety of different groups including; athletes and officials, the media, local residents, spectators, sponsors, or the Games workforce. The proposals must, in 2012 words, aim to solve real life business issues. Potential winners will face a round of regional heats resulting in the fi-

nalists attending a tour of the Olympic Park. The finalists will then be assessed by a panel of judges led by Lord Coe on their response to a final competition challenge. The winner will receive the prize of a trip to the Singapore 2010 Youth Olympic Games and two weeks of paid work experience in the London 2012 sponsorship team at Deloitte. The Deloitte Business Competition is open to all undergraduates and postgraduates at UK universities and is accessible to all degree disciplines. The deadline for entry is Tuesday 1st December at 12:00pm. For more information visit: ybtz45w


Pugwash News Wednesday 18th November 2009


Pugwash News Wednesday 18th November 2009


Local student wins Laura Jones

Current Portsmouth Postgraduate student, David Davey, has recently returned from a national security awards ceremony with a runners up prize under his belt. David who also studied an undergraduate degree at Portsmouth was nominated for the prize due to the exceptional level of his undergraduate dissertation. David’s dissertation ‘The Changing of Stewarding Dynamics at Premiership Football Clubs: A Case Study Shiretown F.C’ was undertaken by giving out questionnaires to a number of club stewards and by carrying out an interview with the safety office of an anonymous football club. David was nominated for the Wilf Knight award by Institute of Criminal Justice Studies (ICJS) lecturers Mark Button and Azeem Aleem. Each year the Security Institute seeks nominations from Higher Education establishments with security related courses for outstanding pieces of work. ICJS lecturer Mark Button says, “Dave produced a dissertation of excellent quality that secured interesting and original findings on stadia security and stewarding. He produced the best security related dissertation from all our courses and we therefore nominated him for the Wilf Knight

award. I’m really pleased he managed to secure a runners up prize.” The awards judges referred to David’s work as “a timely and detailed piece of work.” The security excellence awards were held on October 22nd 2009 at the London Hilton Hotel on Park Lane and played host to the Wilf Knight award for the first time. The award aims to recognise those who are new into the security industry and to encourage and reward their achievements. The award is named after the late husband of the former Security Institute director, Patricia Knight. Wilf Knight held a MA and MPhil from Cambridge University and believed that it was these qualifications that helped him achieve his undoubted success in the security industry and the Police Force. The award is a fitting tribute to someone who recalls the need for a link between academia and its practical application. This year saw the creation of a new MSc in Security Management within ICJS, a fantastic opportunity for the Department and an area of academia with huge amounts of potential, something which David’s award demonstrates first hand.  

Students are being encouraged to ‘pitfart’ their way to Paris in a competition aimed at raising awareness of lymphoma, the most common cancer in 15-30 year olds. Students who upload videos of themselves ‘pitfarting’, (the noise made by cupping your hand under your armpit), on to: www. can win a trip for two to Paris. The winner will be the video with the most views on the website, which will have information about the symptoms of lymphoma. The Lymphoma Association charity has created the acronym PITS - Persistent lumps, Itching, Tiredness and Sweating, to highlight the danger signs of the disease. Ian Leech, whose 20 year old daughter Mel died of lymphoma

in 2008 said: “It’s so important for young people to have an awareness of lymphoma. With the benefit of hindsight, we can see that before Mel was diagnosed she had a lot of the classic symptoms but, of course, having no knowledge of the disease, we were unable to recognise them.” Julie Mercer, Head of Communications for The Lymphoma Association said: “Research shows that standard health messages generate a poor level of awareness among the student age group, so we’re hoping that a tonguein-cheek competition and a trip to Paris will raise consciousness of the disease and its symptoms.”

The competition runs until the 2nd March 2010. For more information visit

Wanna be a star? Sarah Morcom

Unemployed teenagers are turning to the film industry for inspiration and are giving uni students the chance to star in a movie. “Don't Call Back” is a film project launched by Youthink Productions – formed by a group of London's unemployed youth.  Ignoring the urge to sign on, the group are making a micro-budget psychological thriller which will be filmed between January 4-9th 2010 and planned to be released in Spring the same year.  The production company need to raise £20,000 to fund the film and in exchange for donations people will be able to star

Faye Joice

The Theatre Royal on the main Guildhall Walk strip, walked passed by students everyday and probably ignored for the likes of Walkabout or Yates, is getting a new £4 million redevelopment. The New Theatre Royal will be a modern home for the arts, a 700 seat venue, with a much bigger stage and with improved backstage facilities. The redevelopment will involve building on unused land at the back of the Theatre, known as the back-lot. There will also be a 150 seat studio, to be used by smaller community productions, and to showcase some of The University Of Portsmouth’s finest talents! The project altogether is planned to cost more than £20 million, with a very large contribution of this from the University itself. The initial fundraising campaign to raise the £4 million will begin with the Theatres ‘Let’s make it great’ weekend where there will be theatre-based outdoor events and performances for everyone to enjoy. This will run in January on the weekend of the 15-17th. Theatre director Caroline Sharman says: “The plans will allow the Royal to continue to complement the bigger Kings Theatre at Southsea in the service it provides, including arthours films and local rock bands.”

Had a sucess? Let us know -

Fart your way to Paris Dan Whiteway

UoP aids landmark redevelopment

in the film.   “Don't call back” is about a 17-yearold office mail boy, working in a hateful environment where his colleagues fall victim to a mysterious 'mind control illness'. After seeing his crush's mind being taken, Kevin sets off to rid his office of the mind control device and set free his fellow workers – and the love of his life, Tracie.  The young people behind Youthink met at an event held by the Prince's Trust and say they want to 'make something of their lives through film'. They have enlisted the help of industry experts, Mark Roberts and Christopher Nicholson, both from Scious Media, to work with them on the film.

There will also be a 150 seat studio

For information, or to get involved volunteering for the Theatre and its fundraising weekend, visit

Frantic students resort to gambling Amy Cox

In a recent report, the charity organisation Gamcare released statistics that identify a third of the people they seek to help are students aged between 18 and 25. Mounting debts are the main cause of many students resorting to the dangerously unpredictable world of gambling. Students are particularly vulnerable as most possess poor financial skills and so lack the risk assessment skills required. Andy McLellan, the organisation's chief executive said: “They are in debt for the first time and wonder how to get out of it. They see maths students - who understand the risks - and believe they can do it, too.” Adrian Scarff from Gamcare believes that the problem lies with how

accessible gambling is online. Thousands of pounds can be gambled without having to leave the comfort of your own home and students with their own laptops and new-found freedom are falling victim. Scarff said: “Young people enjoy the buzz of gambling and over a period of time they might have fun, but the house always wins.” Once having received their loans, students are increasingly playing games like poker in attempts to up their money. The reality is that they are inevitably throwing themselves deeper in debt. However, for those students still waiting for loans, gambling is fast becoming a temptation. Many take the risk and bet what money they have in order to make money quick. It is also more and more common for drunken students to wander to their nearest casino to continue the spend-

ing after a night out. The increasing amount of students doing so are worryingly labeled as the ‘silent addiction’ cases of excessive gambling.

...increasingly playing games like poker in attempts to up their money

If you think you may have a problem with gambling, contact Gamcare at, or via their helpline on 0845 6000 133

Fashion students Sarah Morcom

Fashion students from the University of Portsmouth are bringing the theatre to life in Chichester.

More than 70 people aged 10-19 are involved with the musical

Eight 2nd-years studying BA (Hons) Fashion and Textile Design

with Enterprise have been busy making some of the costumes for 'The Snow Queen' which is taking to the stage at Chichester Festival Theatre in December.   The students began by pattern-cutting for the 14 bee costumes and will soon start sewing.   Elaine Igoe, Senior Lecturer in the School of Creative Arts, Design and Media (SCAFM) said: “This is a wonderful opportunity for our students to obtain first-hand experience of working with experts in costume design and production.”   She added: “The students get to practise their skills and the theatre gets to tap into their talent – it's a winwin situation.” 

Costume designer for the show, Amy Jackson said: “I'm so pleased we are linking with the university and really impressed with the number of students who have volunteered to give up their free time. If any of the students really stand out they could easily get a job out of this.” “It's really exhausting but absolutely great fun and seeing the costumes on stage will make all their hard work worthwhile.” More than 70 people aged 10-19 are involved with the musical version of the classical tale of The Snow Queen. Tickets for the show, which is being performed from December 16th to 31st, are available from  


Pugwash News Wednesday 18th November 2009

Comment & Opinion

Furthering the Green Movement Debate Matt Blackall

I am of the opinion that Sophie’s otherwise well written and interesting comment in the previous paper (Issue 32, “ Green movement or green ideology?”) is missing the point. The original comment to which Sophie’s piece is in response to (Issue 31, “Green movement needs single voice”, Chris Spackman) was calling for a ‘single green voice’, in light of the fact that there are now so many groups campaigning and diluting what is essentially the same message. It is true that there is a lot more to environmentalism than climate change, but it is the urgency and the consequences of not acting to prevent human caused climate change that has directed environmentalists’ attention to climate change. There is of course a debate over whether human life is having an adverse effect upon the climate, however as has been pointed out by economists and scientists before, the consequences of not acting and climate change occurring are much worse than acting

and climate change not happening. Climate change is not just an environmental issue as well. It will effect the quantities of food in the world. It will create millions of climate refugees all looking for a new home. It will impact upon people’s lives to such an extent that, in the countries hardest hit by climate change,it could be argued that by not acting to prevent climate change you are infringing upon their human rights. What has dampened progression on tackling climate change is how to do go about stopping it – which is what Chris’ original comment was about. There are so many groups suggesting so many solutions that it will only turn people away. For example, the Government think that responsibility lies with ordinary people to change their living habits, whereas the Green Party believes it is the role of the Government to help people improve the impact they have upon the climate in a way in which it will also improve their own lives. This is not an argument that can be correlated with the idea of a communist command economy, as was hinted

at. It is also not something that can be argued against by pointing towards climate change-denying scientists such as Prof Patrick Michaels who, it has been reported (in 1995), had to disclose how much money he was receiving from industry sources that included coal mining associations. The point that I would like to challenge the most though is the fear expressed in the comment regarding the loss of freedom of expression and the impact upon civil liberties that a singular climate change fighting voice would bring. I just cannot see Greenpeace hunting down members of Friends of the Earth, or the Green Party purging members who also signed up to lobby their MP about 10:10. The point is not about repressing other points of view in regards to how to prevent human influenced climate change – it is about bringing the various ideas together in one coherent direction.

Read the rest of the debate:

What’s the real price? Daniel Whiteway

For as long as there has been university, there has been student hedonism and excess, usually involving minor breaches of the law and intoxicating substances. These marked the passage from teenage years into full-blown adulthood. None of these traditions are as sacred as the bar crawl. Dressing up, getting drunk and ending up in some manner of device built for sleeping or over a toilet, via a stolen police cone and regrettable fast food. All nice and clichéd. Despite the abuse they are now receiving, mass bar crawl events are a natural, albeit rather exploitive, evolution of the bar crawl format. Dress up, get drunk, bed-like object, cone, fast food etc. Just this time someone makes a profit off the shirt on your back. This is the kicker. Due to the profit that’s being made by the company off the exploitation of a public domain format, they deserve the castigation they’re currently getting from our media and our judiciary. Mass bar crawls are not designed

explicitly for the enjoyment of the participants; they make their own fun out of it, as you do with any bar crawl, by making up your own games, not having a generic “same-as-everyone-else” night out (aren’t these supposed to be ‘unique’ nights anyway?) They are designed, like most things, to make cash for the organisers, in this case the promoters and the bars involved. Which is completely fair of course, it’s their right within our system. However, it’s a huge business risk to associate your company with an event that you know will be very controversial. Pictures of drunken behaviour, particularly by young people, are a very sensitive issue in ‘Broken Britain’ and having your company’s name plastered along their shirts in said pictures is going to damage the reputation of that company. The company must know the risks, both legally and financially, of these pictures, which will inevitably get out. When they organise these events, they must accept the risks that come with these profits. They just do not seem to want to, constantly trotting out the “we do not encourage irresponsible or excessive

On “The Execution of Gary Glitter” Grant “Angryman” Clarke

Today, I join my friends from Amnesty International on the reinforced proclamation of the continued and consistent crusade on the banning of world-wide capital punishment. It is a juvenile and mob pleasing way of saving money in the judicial system (it’s just my opinion!), and now, by Channel 4 granting the wish of many a morbid and sadistic person, we can continue our societal relish of the cult of the death of a celebrity (whilst entirely missing the entire debate of capital punishment); good or bad, if we want to keep it in television’s simplistic terms. The cult of the death of celebrities, or celebritarianism, shows its roots from 1963 when a certain world leader’s tragic death was televised world-wide, and ever since, televisual media/society has been obsessed with drawing in viewers by watching consistent repeats of the killings of the famous. I mentioned in my article last week that the last person to receive such treatment was a Miss Jade Goody, whose tragic death was to become the flagship news story for

a very blood hungry media, satisfied only with its ‘deadly’ ratings. The overall premise of this particular show was to show a ‘parallel’ Britain, with a ‘parallel’ Home Secretary (who is just as blood hungry as the crowd masturbating over her every word) who re-instates the death penalty. After watching archive footage of a not-so-level headed Ann Widdecombe MP on the subject of capital punishment, and mock interviews with the ‘hanging-technician’ (this I laughed at, how P-C) and the prison Chaplain; after an hour of watching Glitter pace the room, TV finally gets its ‘execution’, enjoyed by the group orgasm of a rather disturbed crowd. However much it claimed to be a “clever” look at modern execution, what sort of argument was really going on here? Again, it just felt like a depiction rather than an argument. And where did they get their statistics from? I’ve yet to meet any adult that has been involved in polling (if anyone whose reading this has, please, let me know!) I always thought of C4 as a producer of ‘Quality TV Programming’, open to suggestion, and yet it’s jumped into the morally grey hues of life. Oh well.

Shockingly bad comedy drinking” line. Anyone who has ever been on a bar crawl knows that things will generally get messy. When you are on a bar crawl organised amongst your mates, responsibility to look after yourself lies with you. Yes, the same is true in a mass bar crawl event, but some must lie with the organisers, even if it just to save face for them. Volunteer stewards are ‘employed’ but these people are not trained to deal with excessively inebriated individuals. To hire those who are would cut into profit margins, of course. It’s not the fault of the organisers that people will inevitably go too far and not know their limits - indeed I have before. However, they should understand and accept the responsibilities that come with organising an event such as this. If they are willing to take the bar crawl format and make it their own, they should also face the consequences when it goes wrong. What do you think? Are these events enjoyable or irresponsible - or purely for profit? Let us know:

Will Preston

So, all over Facebook, the BBC and the pubs of my hometown, loyal fans of ‘Mock The Week’ are bleating about the departure of one trick pony, Frankie Boyle. Yes, it seems that his blunt humour will be sorely missed by fans of the show, but is it really a loss? Boyle’s humour was witless shock humour, with jabs at Kerry Katona mixed in for unfunny combinations, yet he got easy laughs. Of course one of the basis’ of comedy is dancing around subjects that most people would awkwardly cough at, but a good comedian works on presenting their funny take on any subject. I myself have attempted stand up comedy at a comedy club before, and I make no joke when I tell you it’s a hard art to master. Finding the right subjects to mock and getting a room full of people to laugh at your twisted ideas seems like an almost impossible task. But no matter how long and hard you construct that perfect

surreal scenario of satire of spoken monologue that is witty, engaging and appealing to an audience, it’s a shot to the soul to see low brow and frankly (no pun intended) witless comedians making jokes about perennial subjects that sound all to similar to material that Viz magazine used the previous month. Boyle is more like a modern day Jim Davidson; shocking, devil may care attitude and highly appealing to people to people who consider Nuts magazine to be a peak of culture. It’s not the shock humour I’m fighting at; it’s the lazy presentation. If you want to see a stand up do shock humour that is witty whilst hitting the nail, I have a list for you: Bill Hicks, George Carlin, Doug Stanhope, and Stewart Lee. There are many others, but the fun of exploring entertainment is making the journey yourself. YouTube those names and work your way to a better understanding of what makes good stand up material.

Grind my Gears Come follow us on Twitter (@upsucomment) and tell us what “grinds your gears”, or leave us any comments or opinions on Facebook (UPSU Media Comment & Opinion Team) or by email ( about this latest issue of Pugwash News, for a chance to get published next issue!

Faye Joice - car parks are stupidly expensive!

mattblackall - people who think “Socialism = USSR”

Amy Johnson - people that walk really slowly in front of you, where there’s no room to go past them. They seem to notice I’m in a hurry, or trying to get somewhere, and just walk even slower!

Gamel Oki - not having a choice over whether we can accept day-light savings time or not

ElGranto - when you miss the Uni bus by a minute, and it drives past Lidls as you’re walking up the road. Long journey ahead...

Catherine Ng - being unable to get my words out...


Pugwash News Wednesday 18th November 2009

Comment & Opinion

Bah Humbug! Offensive or funny? Cat Fyson

Daniel Whiteway

‘Tis the season to be jolly, apparently. Now I’m no pessimist, but I can be a bit of a Scrooge. The first thing that concerns me about the Christmas season is the fact it seems to begin weeks and weeks in advance. Already there are adverts aplenty, showered with Christmas joy, yelling “I wish it could be Christmas everyday”. Well it can’t. For the very reason that Christmas once a year is more than enough stress to handle. The shopping extravaganza has already begun on Commercial Road, and Gunwharf has been twice as busy over the past few weeks, which leads me nicely to the second reason Christmas grinds my gears a bit. Why must people insist upon dropping any sort of manners and etiquette in shops during the run up to Christmas? Why is it so incredibly important to get your second cousin twice removed a new iPod at the expense of pushing someone else out of the way to grab it first? They’re probably only going to get you a gift voucher anyway. Then who looks ridiculous. As a student with less money than I care to realise, another thing that gets to me is, who the hell do you buy presents for? Close family is a given, housemates or flatmates is a given, but what about those coursemates you hang out with all the time, or the friend of a friend? If they get you something and you don’t return the favour, how bad are you going to feel? Merry Christmas everybody.

Why is it that the mainstream media and our politicians are so eager to claim that a sector of the general public is “outraged”? Last week, MPs and Sunday newspapers criticised Jimmy Carr for his joke regarding wounded soldiers returning from Afghanistan and how “great Britain’s 2012 Paralympic team will be” - admittedly a very edgy joke, but, given in the right context, funny.

While gags made...are very near the edge, the fact remains that they are never meant maliciously

However, MPs and newspapers reported that the 2500-person audience at the Manchester Apollo, where Carr was performing, were shocked into silence and that members of Britain’s armed forces were collectively insulted. However, audience members quoted said nothing of the sort and messageboards aimed at members of the Armed Services contained no messages of outrage and even jokingly insulted Carr, accusing him of stealing a joke prevalent in the Army for years. Furthermore, Carr’s commitment to visiting injured serviceman at Selby Oak military hospital was portrayed as wrong in retrospect, not a selfless and generous act. This is not an isolated incident. Numerous comedians and TV personalities have sparked wild criticism from MPs and Fleet Street for edgy jokes, from Boyle to Clarkson. While gags made by the likes of these three are very near the edge, the fact remains that they are never meant maliciously. Why then, do our MPs and media feel the need to tell us how we should feel? By all means let the media report it. Our politicians can then express their dismay if they feel the need to. But to try and jump on a bandwagon or to make the news themselves in an attempt to make their name known is just unnecessary. These are jokes. Concentrate on the true evil speech makers out there, whether it be the BNP, Islamic extremists or any other extreme groups, not the comedians.

Defending Che Guevara

Ben Norman

To understand Che Guevara you must separate the man from the myths which engulf him and then understand the ideas he stood for and the people he stood with. There are three mythologies of Che. There is the revolutionary icon, the martyred Christ-like figure who is lionised by elements of the left. Secondly there is the bloodthirsty tyrant, an image fabricated from Cold War propaganda. Finally there is ‘brand che,’ a nihilistic Disney-fication of a photo, cynically aimed at the middle class ‘revolutionary chic’ who wear his face on a T-shirt while being ignorant of the man. Ernesto Che Guevara was none of these things. He was an ordinary man, a medical student from Argentina, who had asthma, smoked and shared the flaws of any other ordinary man. But, he lived in extraordinary times. He recognised the injustices in Latin America and he fought to change them. He played a key role freeing Cuba from a ruthless regime and was murdered trying to emulate that success across Latin America. Yet individuals do not write history and he didn’t’ act alone, he fought alongside thousands of ordinary workers and peasants who were inspired by and shared his ideas of democratic socialism. In the opposing piece the writer makes sweeping falsehoods about Socialism and ‘Communism’, showing a banal and lazy analysis of the facts. Stalin’s Russia was a despotic regime, but it was just that ‘Stalinist’, it was not Marxist or Leninist and was certainly not genuinely Communist or Socialist. Che’s ideas of democratic Socialism had as much in common with Stalinism as Catholicism does with the Spanish Inquisition. Both are a hideous distortion.

Off the wall Ricky Sutton

“My friendship will always be alongside you, always be strong; it will never, ever diminish” - quite sweet really. Is it a nice quote from a card? A message on a Valentine’s gift, perhaps? No and no. It is, of course, Derek Acorah channelling the spirit of Michael Jackson and reducing an MJ fan to tears. Don’t believe me? Then check out ‘Sky1’s Michael Jackson: The Live Séance’, which could possibly be the most hilarious and costly program in post-production counseling on Sky1. Set in the Irish manor Michael resided in whilst writing his last album (the owner, without a hint of irony,

The writer also mentions executions, which I’ll not shy away from addressing. Socialists are staunch opponents of capital punishment, yet during the revolution executions took place. These were not of ‘ordinary citizens,’ but of murders, rapists, gangsters and pimps. I do not agree with capital punishment, but this makes Che no more of a mass murderer then Barack Obama, who presides over a nation with capital punishment today. Che Guevara fought for socialism, which attracted thousands of ordinary workers and peasants into the jungle to fight alongside him against a brutal enemy and for an alternative. It was, and remains, democratic socialism that the people of Cuba want. We socialists support the Cuban people’s desire to reclaim their society from the distorted regime of Castro. Yet, we also acknowledge the successes of Cuba which must be defended, such as the high levels of education, healthcare and economic planning. We realise that the people do not wish for a return to the gangster capitalism of their past. Che Guevara was an ordinary man who not only represented, but fought alongside thousands of other ordinary people living in extraordinary times who were forced to fight for a better, socialist, world. Their struggle inspired millions across the world and it is in memory of those ordinary people and their vision that we remember Che Guevara as a hero. As we endure the latest crisis of capitalism as another generation of ordinary people are being forced onto the dole ques is it any wonder that people are turning to the image of Che and the ideas of democratic Socialism once again? The Socialist Student Society wishes to extend an invitation to the writer of the opposing article to a public debate to discuss her ideas and misconceptions of both Che Guevara and the ideology he stood for.

Pugwash on Pure FM said Michael liked to stay in the room overlooking the playground), the show featured habitual-liar and bad actor Derek Acorah, lying and badly acting his way through an hour of live ‘séance’-ing with four of the UK’s biggest MJ fans. And when I say MJ fans, I obviously mean nutjobs, both terms sadly becoming all too easily confused in the last decade. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a fan of Michael Jackson’s work (and I say work because it includes most of his music and that wicked film he made about not taking drugs. At the end he turned into a robot and then a spaceship. I don’t know what they were on when they came up with that one) - but anyone who believes Derek Acorah can summon

anything other than loathing towards himself is a nutcase in my book. June Sarpong hosted (bet you wish you’d stuck with T4 now) and was joined by one of Michael’s ‘closest friends’ and all round media whore David Gest, who makes your most embarrassing relative seem dignified. He chatted to Jackson’s Mum the night before apparently, who, being a Jehovah’s Witness, doesn’t agree with séances and contacting the dead and the like - but being the respectful family friend he is, he’s going ahead with it anyway. And to be honest, I’m not complaining. Hunt this bad boy down on YouTube if you’re a fan of total car-crash television, and nutters.

Have anything to say about what you’ve read in Pugwash News? Then tune into Pure FM, Portsmouth’s very own student radio station, between 3 and 4 on Thursdays and have your say! Every week, Editor Laura “Spag” Patricia and Life & Style Editor Melissa “Sheep” Flack take a look at the paper and debate and discuss the issues raised in it. But we can’t do that without your input - let us know what you think about our articles, if you agree with us, or if anything we’ve said has gotten you outraged. to listen to get in touch!


Pugwash News Wednesday 18th November 2009

Life & Style










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Pugwash News Wednesday 18th November 2009

Life & Style

An Englishwoman in Strasbourg Tash Alexander

Every issue, Tash brings you tales and observations from her time as an exchange student in Europe. To tourists, France is associated with Paris, the Eiffel tower, baguettes and other such things. I have come to associate it with lateness and most of the world’s deforestation due to the number of forms to fill in for trivial things. Don’t get me wrong, Strasbourg is an amazing place and seems to have a little bit of everything if you look hard enough, it’s just that for someone that is used to a couple of forms right at the start of the year and getting to lectures on time (if not early) to avoid the potential backlash, someone turning up for a meeting at least 30 minutes late (a meeting they themselves arranged I should add) takes some adjusting to... Lectures are proving to be... an experience. Never again will you hear me complain about 9am lectures in Portsmouth. They really aren’t that bad, given that at most it’s a 45 minute walk, and a pleasant walk at that to Park building. Here, it takes me the best part of an hour on the

tram or closer to 2 hours to walk to my department. Now this probably doesn’t seem that bad, and it’s not unless your first lecture of the day is at 8am. Leaving the house at 6.45am at the latest in order to get to a two hour history lecture is not the most pleasant thing in the world. It’s not all been doom and gloom however. Now that I have found somewhere to live for the duration of my stay (that’s a whole other story. I was here for 3 weeks before managing that), the whole experience is proving far more enjoyable than I expected. I’m even managing to speak to locals without butchering the language too badly, which is a vast improvement from when I first arrived here.  I was afraid to say anything in case I offended them, though for some strange reason, most of the French residents here think I’m German, and most of the German residents think I’m French, even though (to me) I sound very English when I speak either language - weird! So two months into my stay, things are shaping up rather well. I’m off to enjoy my week’s holiday and take full advantage of living so close to Germany.   À bientôt!

Fire alarms Amy Cox

One thing I certainly do not miss about halls are the dreaded fire alarms. Everybody hated them! They went off at the worst times, early Tuesday mornings as you were crawling in from a vodka-fuelled night out, or in the early hours of the morning when you had a 9 o’clock lecture. I swear the majority of these false alarms were in the winter months, and despite them being FALSE, we still had to wait outside for hours shivering to death (unless you were the token duvet guy/girl). On one ill-timed occasion, the alarm interrupted me showering. Though I was very tempted to ignore it, I don’t think my other housemates were going to quit relentlessly banging on my door until I showed. So with conditioner in my hair, shaving foam on my legs and worst of all no make-up (!), I threw on what clothes I could. However, due to foamed legs this deemed difficult, so I resorted to the longest coat I owned. Unfortu-

nately, there were other embarrassing instances which involved being incredibly drunk to the point where it took two good friends to aid in my evacuation. I must admit these are not among my proudest moments.

The scourge of halls could save your life

Overall, fire alarms were NOT my friend in James Watson. I’m sure others of you loathed the random, ear-drum piercing drills. However, aside from accidental settings off and the idiots that do it on purpose, the Thursday morning testers and evacuation practices are carried out for a very good reason. So if you’re one of these people that ignore them, sleeps through them (yes, it’s really happened) or refuses to leave in order to save face... I say wise up, wake up, suck it up, and get out!

Wine, bloody wine

Warm fashion Primrose Tricker

Oh the weather outside is frightening...

As you may have noticed, the weather round here has not been that friendly of late. In fact, it’s been said (on the telly box) that this November is several degrees colder than average. With endless rainy days, there are fallen wet leaves being whipped around your ankles by practically gale force winds as you soldier on to your lectures. What fun. The only thing that can make the trek into classes seem bearable is the fact that the heating in most of the buildings will be much hotter than that in your student digs. So. Outside it’s too cold and wet, and inside it can get hot and humid. My solution? Layers.

Will Wells

Part One The distance from Southampton to Portsmouth is 27 miles, the average person walks 3.5 miles per hour, that’s just over seven hours – I was zigzagging. Recently, I decided to rekindle my sometimes, well often, troubled relationship with wine. I’ve never been an avid fan, mostly due to nights ending prematurely and embarrassingly. Forgetting past experiences, I went to fetch pre-drinks. There was ‘tried and tested’ vodka, there was ‘old reliable’ beer but I decided to flirt with ‘the memory taker’ - wine. Tonight was to be in Southampton, my first experience of Portsmouth’s neighbour’s nightlife and the beautiful women there; it would be best not to get too wasted. However, arriving late I was made to neck a half glass of tequila before entry was even permitted. I hid throwing up in my mouth rather well. What followed was a masterclass in how not to drink safely – three hours of pre-drinking being cut to just one. Bottles were drained, cabs arrived, entry into club went trouble free – but then the wine hits me. That’s the last I remember of my night. Sure, other stuff happened; apparently my mates witnessed me attempting piggy-backs on the D-Floor, a little later enjoying a particularly energetic game of urinal swords and the last they saw was me playing high-roller, card in hand, buying strangers shots. As far as my

memory goes, it might have all happened to someone else. My night really began at about half one; as if suddenly teleported to a strange car park, my brain kicks in, still slightly inebriated, I’ve no idea how or why I’m here, or even where here is. My phones disappeared and I’ve no money. But hallelujah - my cash card is in my pocket. I fall into a cab and ask how much to London. £300. Err - how much to Portsmouth? £50. I’m not that wasted, I go with Portsmouth. Although I’ve no actual money, I inform my man that I have a card which is the key to much cash, all he has to do is take me to a cash point and I will withdraw the fare. He takes me to a cash point – I know my pin, but my fingers just aren’t doing exactly what I tell them and after three incorrect entries my card is blocked. The cabbie comes to help, the Good Samaritan that he is, he offers to plug the numbers in while I call them out. Perfect, this solves both our problems, if only everyone was as generous with their thinking. Now sober I wouldn’t recommend this; it’s no matter however, the card’s still blocked. Unconcerned, I assure him that there is loads of money at my house, which there isn’t, and that on arrival he will receive a tip that will set him up for Christmas. He reminds me that with no phone and no keys there’s a distinct possibility that we could get to Portsmouth and he doesn’t get paid. I agree... Pick up a copy of Issue 34 (out 4th Dec) to find out what happens next!

Two of the supposed ‘must haves’ from the magazines are long sleeved gloves, and knee high or higher boots.

A big trend this season is the boyfriend fit blazer and coat. It’s undeniable that those baggy coats and jackets are brilliant for wrapping up warm in. You can fit a jumper, plus cardi, plus top, plus vest, with space to tuck the ends of your scarf inside one of these bad boys. Might seem excessive, but lots of thin layers are really great for when you have to go from really cold to rather warm quite quickly. Also, lets not forget those parts of us we’d rather not be without. Your hands and your feet, being your extremities, will suffer the cold more than the rest of you. Science and experience tell us that keeping your feet and hands warm will make the rest of you feel warmer, as your body has to work less hard to stop losing feeling. Two of the supposed ‘must haves’ from the magazines are long sleeved gloves, and knee high or higher boots. Very good for keeping your toes toasty, and your fingers frost free. Pair the big blazer, the long gloves, and the high boots with a warm hat and some good fitting jeans, and you’ll not only be the warmest cat on campus, but you’ll also be the coolest.


Pugwash News Wednesday 18th November 2009

Life & Style

2010 AG

Ricky Sutton

“Retail Sales Are Still Hampered By Credit Crunch”; “Unemployment Levels Soar As Credit Crunch Continues”; “You Will Never Ever Get A Job!”.... Just a sample of recent headlines that have caused me to worry about what to do after leaving university (the last one was made up, but the way things are going, I’d give it 2 weeks). Speaking to recent graduates, the situation still seems bleak. For instance, a friend of mine, Katie Campbell (recently graduated from Keele University) says, “Job hunting is currently a nightmare! There’s such high competition for employment opportunities, I’m applying for anything I can”. Jess Mell (just graduated from Warwick Uni) says that “Competition for the jobs I’m interested in  is very high at the moment. They also usually require at least a year’s experience, which rules me out as this is the first time I’ve been out of education.”  There appear to be no jobs, no money and practically no prospects. However, refusing to let all this scaremongering get me down, I’ve found a couple of options available to students after graduation: 1. Apply to loads of different jobs and hope for an interview - It may sound simple, but you would be surprised

just how many people apply for only one or two jobs. Tailor your CV to suit specific jobs, and don’t forget to include cover letters, shamelessly selling yourself, with all your applications. 2. Continue studying – PGCEs, Masters and other courses taken after university fall into this category. Courses can be either full-time or part-time. Look into these well in advance of wanting to undertake them, as preparation and planning will be key in both gaining the qualification and maintaining a social-life. 3. Teach abroad – Plenty of countries such as Mexico, South Korea and Thailand are desperate for English speaking graduates to come to their classrooms and teach their students English. Depending on the company you go through, different procedures and lengths of stay will be required, but if you do your research and read all the fine print, you could end up with a very nice placement, somewhere nice and hot. A downside is that contracts for teachers often cover around a 10-12 month period, so may not be suitable for those who like to visit home often. 4. Volunteer –  Although not always feasible, this can help no end towards getting your perfect job. In a world where more people are gaining degrees every year, any experience in your chosen field could be the decider

for an employer between you and another candidate. Those who are clever will volunteer during their time at university instead of watching daytime TV, unless you think knowing the line-up on Loose Women will help in an interview. If you’re stuck for where you can find volunteering opportunities, speak to your course supervisor, tutor or have a word with the people at Purple Door. Obviously, studying hard and using your time at university wisely appears to be the most sensible way forward. Saying that, I’ve never volunteered myself, generally do essays at the last minute, and enjoying monging out to Jeremy Kyle... See you in the dole queue. (I should point out, THIS IS NOT ADVICE.) • The website  has lots of useful information on everything from finding jobs, to presenting yourself well in interviews. • Websites such as teachabroad. com  and  offer extensive information and contacts for anyone interested in this option. •Those who are still having trouble finding jobs visit the job centre and send your CV out to as many companies and websites as possible.

You(should)Tube Ricky Sutton

Students lurve wasting time looking at funny clips on YouTube (So much so, this article was supposed to be about something far more important... go figure.) So we thought we’d save you the hard work of looking, and give you the names of some of the funniest clips available on the net. Enjoy! Beyonce Clown - This clip, like so many featured here, is for the You’ve Been Framed generation. A generation so desensitised to fat women falling over, or kids hitting their heads, that we find such things funny. For those who can’t get enough of this clip, make sure you check out the remixes. Good call to wear the mask love, you’d never have lived this down. Stripper Falls on Face – An-

other clip Beadle would’ve dished out £250 for, except this poor girl isn’t wearing a mask (though she might be wearing a neck brace now). Not just funny, but also a moral lesson in there somewhere about not showing off. If you search around a bit, there’s a brilliant clip where the face plant is repeated over and over again about 5 times. Trust me, it doesn’t get old. All the Single Babies – Another Beyonce homage, and one you could happily show your gran over Christmas. Watch the baby as he or she uncannily copies the intricate moves of Beyonce’s Single Ladies. Okay, so it’s not that uncanny or intricate, but very funny and sweet to watch. This kid has much better moves than me or anyone I know, so it’s also partly educational. What are your favourites? - Share:

Life & Style guide to... cheap and easy cooking Hana McFaul

It really isn’t that hard to cook nice food on the cheap, so here are some pointers to help: 1. The main misconception is that you have to use olive oil for everything, which is expensive and unnecessary; vegetable or sunflower oil is fine for frying in, olive oil only needs to be used for dressings and sauces, i.e. when you are actually going to consume it. 2. Mince is a versatile, cheap meat, and best of all, is fine to freeze before and after cooking. You can use it in spaghetti bolognaise, chilli con carne, lasagne, stuffed vegetables, curried

mince and potatoes (see recipe), Shepherd’s pie... the list goes on! 3. Curry sauces are brilliant for last minute quick meals. You can have them with vegetables or meat, or even just rice. Most people are a bit rice phobic but you can get boil in a bag rice which is almost as good and easy as anything! My favourite is just some carrots, peas, peppers, onions, rice and sauce. 4. The obvious thing that people forget is basic fruit and veg. It’s really cheap! Carrots, frozen peas, peppers and onions are all easily under a pound for a good amount and can be used for many things: casserole, stuffed vegetables, vegetable curries, vegetables and gravy...

5. The same can be said for some fruits (granted, not all). Bananas are from as little as 10p each, apples and pears are also inexpensive. 6. Okay, not to everyone’s taste but I had to add it in – Custard! It literally makes any desert far more interesting. A tub/can of custard is 80p max and lasts forever (sort of). The extras that go with it like Bananas (10p), Swiss roll (13p), Bourbon biscuits (3p each) and anything else you fancy, are so cheap that you don’t ever have to leave out desert again! 7. If you’re not a custard lover other cheap deserts you could try are: rice pudding, plain Swiss roll, ice cream, yogurts, mousses and flapjack (easy to make too).


Cooking instructions:

Oil Curry powder Mince (any variety) Potatoes Plain yogurt (can be substituted with thick cream or crème frechè if you’d rather)

Wash and peel the potatoes and cut into small pieces. Heat the oil, and fry the meat in a pan for 15 minutes. Add the potatoes to the meat and fry for 5 more minutes, stirring occasionally. Add the curry powder and then slowly stir in the plain yogurt and bring to the boil. Simmer until the meat is cooked and season to taste. Yum!

And anything else you fancy, to add some variety to the dish, e.g. onions, garlic, salt & pepper etc


Pugwash News Wednesday 18th November 2009

Arts & Entertainment


Michael Jackson - This Is It Chris Batchelor

First of all, let me say I had tickets for the opening date of the This Is It tour, so yes: this review is coming from a MJ fan. I can now say if it wasn’t for Jackson’s tragic death, his performances at the O2 would have been a once in a lifetime experience. Kenny Ortega uses rehearsal footage to give us what is essentially a concert movie, however without the screaming fans, finished dance routines, and over-the-top costumes. Consequently, it may be argued that this is just another ploy to make money out of the King of Pop’s death, but nonetheless, true Jackson fans will get a thrill watching the man himself strut

his stuff one last time. Billie Jean, Man in the Mirror and Smooth Criminal are just some of the hits Jackson sings, and each performance seems to capture some of the magic that made millions fall in love with him originally. MJ appears very passionate about the tour; his assistance of the backing singers and dancers shows him more as a perfectionist than a man under pressure. Thriller has a 3D video which sees the dead rise, whilst Smooth Criminal opens with a gangster/film noir style video. It all looks like it would have been phenomenal come the opening date of the tour. This Is It includes footage of the auditions and rehearsals of the backing dancers, and unquestionably they

would have been vital for the tour. However I couldn’t help but feel the interviews scattered across the film came over as fake. It is as if Kenny Ortega wanted the story of the dancers to be as important as the footage of Jackson singing, but directing the audience’s attention away from Jackson almost takes away the point of the film. Overall, This Is It is a present for any fan, as we discover how first-class the tour would have been. This film, coupled with the mystery of never knowing what it would have been like to see this spectacle live, will keep fans talking and ensure that the King of Pop’s legacy goes on and on.

turns unravelling at every corner, and confusing the audience as the writers tried to back up the gory traps with some kind of subplot. However, in Saw VI the story fitted together nicely, with explanations for events in the previous instalments that at the time did not seem logical. Saw VI also gained points by focusing on following one main character as he set about completing four trials in the hope of “finding his family”. Each were more gruesome and terrifying than the last, leading to an extremely clever and

unexpected twist. There was also an appearance of the infamous “head trap” from the first film, which was tied together nicely with a number of flashbacks that would have also been useful for anyone who hadn’t seen the first film. Saw VI has helped the franchise recover from any damage that had been done by the last few films, and given back the audience the true essence of Saw... gruesome gore and hide-behind-your-popcorn horror!

Saw VI Emma Shillinglaw

Five films on, has the latest instalment of this popular franchise kept this shocking premise alive? The opening scene of Saw VI was perhaps the most gruesome and brilliant of the series yet, instantly letting the audience know Saw VI has stepped things up a gear. It has been widely apparent that since Saw III, the strength of the basic plot has been going downhill, with more twists and

The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus Tamsin Rowe-Davison

As one would expect from the director of ‘Twelve Monkeys’ and ‘The Fisher King’, The Imaginarium is a visually stunning piece of cinema, taking us from a quasi-religious sect “centuries ago”, through present day London, to the wild fringes of Terry Gilliam’s imagination, as displayed in Parnassus’ imaginarium. Although the plot seems somewhat confused, essentially it is about Dr Parnassus (a superb Christopher

Plummer) and his assistants, including his daughter (Lily Cole), travelling with his struggling sideshow. The show is used as platform for his ability to let people inside their imaginations. On the way they meet the enigmatic Tony, played by Heath Ledger in the real world, and by Johnny Depp, Colin Farrell and Jude Law within the imaginarium. To Gilliam’s credit, after the death of Heath Ledger, rather than re-film it with a new actor, he decided that three new actors should play the same character in later parts of the film. The transition is acknowledged

and, rather ironically, it doesn’t put too much of a stretch on the imagination. Beneath the bizarre concepts and complex multi-dimensional narrative, one can’t help but believe that Gilliam’s films secretly harbour truth and wisdom, and that at its core, what the film is really about is making the right choices. If you are a fan of Gilliam’s inimitable style, or if you are not afraid to see a film that will tax your little grey cells then I would highly recommend this movie.

entertainment, with wonderful reallife characters and the many more festive favourites. It’s the largest Christmas market on the South Coast, with over 150 stalls offering Christmas gift ideas and products to the thousands of visitors they have every year. There are stalls ranging from festive food and drinks, boutique style clothing, fine arts, charming homeware, stunning jewellery and many more unique gifts. Highlights include a Victorian Father of Christmas (complete in tradi-

tional green dress!), a snow covered Victorian Street, Nativity Farm, Punch & Judy shows, Parlour Games, Victorian School Room, Carol singing, Fagin’s Tavern, Lantern Parade, a Ride on Railway, Victorian Fairground and other great Christmas entertainment. So a date for the diary this Christmas, ‘The Victorian Festival Christmas’ from the 27th -29th November at Portsmouth’s Historic Dockyard. For more information or to buy tickets online, visit: christmasfesti-

Culture Faye Joice

Upcoming event: This Christmas, the festivity is at the heart of Portsmouth, at the historic dockyard with their ‘Victorian Festival Of Christmas’. The event is celebrating its 10th anniversary this year, which means they’re really pushing the boat out! There will be plenty of Victorian


Pugwash News Wednesday 18th November 2009

Arts & Entertainment

Pure FM

Restaurant Brasserie Blanc Steph Hall

Shows of the Fortnight

Sunday Sessions is a mix specialist show with essential dance, club and house music, including material from both upcoming and classic artists. Always managing to find a few remixes of common songs just to funk things up a little, Sunday sessions is the best way to start the week ahead. Catch it on 7pm-8pm every Sunday night.

French chef Raymond Blanc, owner of a small chain of Brasserie Blanc restaurants, has opened one in Gunwharf Quays (by the Tesco entrance). From the outside looking in, it looks opulent and expensive, but a closer look at the menu suggests otherwise. While it might not be the place to go when money is short, it’s great for when your quids in. The French cuisine can seem ‘fussy’ if you’re not fond of trying new things. Although Blanc

You can also catch up with weekly film, music and game reviews on PureFM with The Monday Night Review: Monday nights 9pm-10pm, hosted by Matt Pilbeam and Jonny Rowe-Davison

himself states that he “can offer you simple, high quality food” and that his restaurant is “a place for relaxed enjoyment”, I would however, feel uncomfortable going in, in my hoody and casual jeans - it’s not snobby, but you do feel that you should make a little effort in your clothing to match the beautiful interior. For me, I either like the menu or I don’t. By this I mean that there is an a la carte menu (which I never look at as it is the most expensive), and a set menu where you can have a two course meal for lunch for £11.90, including a glass of wine, or a three course

meal for £14.95. There are only three things to choose from each course and some are an acquired taste. I had the potted smoked salmon and wing of ray, which although it looked like stingray, it was in fact skate; something I have never tried but I would definitely have again. The fish was white and just crumbled deliciously. It was perfection with the creamiest mash I have ever tasted. I’m just gutted I couldn’t manage a dessert as the steamed chocolate pudding sounded like a winner.

Mexican Mayhem


Two courses and a drink for £10

Brutal Legend

Every Thursday only with a valid NUS Card! Choose two courses and a drink from: Starters Garlic Flatbread (with or without cheese)

Barbecue Chicken Wings Louisiana Chicken Wings Flautas

Will Preston

Heavy Metal. It works as a music genre, but can it work as a game? Revered game creator Tim Schafer has decided to take up the challenge of dedicating an entire game to the music and mythology of the Heavy Metal genre with the release of Brutal Legend; an adventure game with power and a kick-arse soundtrack.



Quesadillas Tacos# Enchiladas# Burritos# Chimichangas# Chilli con Carne Chilli con Habas Chicken or Verde Fajitas Caesar Salad

Boca Negra Fruit Enchilada* Ice Cream

Drinks Regular Margarita Corona 330ml bottle Coke, Diet Coke, Schweppes Lemonade or Fanta 16oz glass


You know that when you’re fighting alongside such stars, you’re in for a great experience. Well, yes and no

The story is odd to say the least; Jack Black plays Eddie Riggs, a roadie who is transported to a Heavy Metal dimension where the landscape looks like a Dio album cover. There he fights the forces of evil (and girlie glam metal) with an axe, a magical guitar and a pimped out hot-rod that would have Jeremy Clarkson quitting his day job. Along his journey, Riggs meets allies and enemies played by real rockers including Ozzy Osbourne, Lemmy (Motorhead) and Rob Halford (Judas Priest). You know that when you’re fighting alongside such stars, you’re in for a great experience. Well, yes and no. The concept is original and compelling, but it falls flat shortly after. It’s a game that’s based heavily around great presentation, but falls over when it comes to in depth game play and length (you’ll have this rocked in 5 hours and the multiplayer is a graveyard). But the atmosphere, hilarious script and epic soundtrack (featuring over 100 songs from over 70 artists) gives Brutal Legend a reason to pick it up again. An average effort of what could have been a legendary game.



46 The Boardwalk, Port Solent, Portsmouth PO6 4TP Tel: 02392 205 070


Unit 75, Central Buildings, Gunwharf Quays, Portsmouth PO6 3TU Tel: 02392 205 070




REpEaT OffER Valid every time you show your NUS Card at Chiquito Terms and Conditions: #Choose from Cheese and Bean, Chicken or Citrus Pork options. *Small size only. †Leicester Square price is £13. Offer available on production of valid NUS Card. Offer valid every Thursday until end of November 2010. Maximum of four guests per valid NUS Card. Valid at all Chiquito locations. Not valid in conjunction with any other offer or set menu. Subject to availability, no substitute available, no cash alternative. Management reserve the right to amend meals and drinks included in the offer without notice.

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Pugwash News Wednesday 18th November 2009

Arts & Entertainment

Singles Flo-Rida feat. Akon Available



CKY @ The Wedgewood Rooms

Dan Brown The Lost Symbol

Lauren Smith

‘Available’ has high expectations to live up to, if Flo-Rida’s previous releases are anything to go by. Hip-hop princes Akon and are involved too. Surely Flo-Rida has created another huge club hit? No, he hasn’t. To its credit, the chorus is catchy. Akon singing about how “available” he is somehow endears you into dancing and singing along to it. But, that is the only credit I can give this song. The “ooowooo” that Akon repeats at random moments in the song is so irritating, it could be used as a form of torture. The random woman who pops up halfway through the song is baffling and completely out of place. The guitar that accompanies the beat in the first half of the song proves anti-climactic, especially after the trance-like beginning, which showed little promise that you might be able to dance to the song. Even though Flo-Rida has never been Shakespeare re-incarnate when it comes to his lyrics, I think “visit my website, turn on your Skype wit’ me” is shocking. Yes, he is being very contemporary with his mentioning of the internet call site and IPhones but that is the worst way to get a girl to want you.

Surely FloRida has created another huge club hit? No, he hasn’t

Benny Benassi has done three remixes of the song but unfortunately they are just as tiresome as the original. And let’s face it, three is slightly excessive. No matter how much you like a song, four versions of it is never a good thing. Hopefully Flo-Rida can get back to his usual form with his next single. ‘Available’ is nowhere near his best. Honestly, it’s no ‘Low’.  

Madonna Celebration Steph Hall

Love her or hate her, the queen of reinvention is back. Yes, Kabbalah-loving, microbiotic Madge is back to her best. ‘Celebration’ is a, er, celebration of her greatest tracks and is in my opinion, her best greatest hits album to date. Filled with 36 songs of pure delight such as ‘Vogue’, ‘Like A Virgin’, ‘Material Girl’ and many more that aren’t as well known. My only negative is that every time I hear her single, ‘Celebration’, it reminds me of the middleaged Madge thrusting and touching herself inappropriately in the video.

Joe Adams

“Katie Anderson” Chris Mineham

CKY is an interesting band. Having been around for ten years and releasing four well received albums, touring Europe just hasn’t seemed a priority. What with their last UK gig being over four years ago, perhaps they thought the band lacked a large enough UK fan base to make it worth coming back until now. However, from the moment drummer, Jess Margera, steps on stage, the crowd went they best realise they were wrong! Opening their set with Escape

from Hellview, the band blast through most of their most well known songs such as ‘96 Quite Bitter Beings’ and ‘Sinking into the Underground’ in quick succession which raises the question, why so early on? Then suddenly everything becomes very clear. Instead of following their set list, front men Deron Miller and Chad Ginsburg ask the audience to shout out requests; turning a planned gig into a completely improvised show. It speaks volumes of how well the band know their own material, such as old hits ‘Rio Bravo’ and ‘Disengage the Simulator’, that are

played with spontaneous perfection when given five seconds notice. The West Chester boys also have a laugh, with snippets of ‘Cher’ and ‘Timbaland’ putting smiles of confusion on the audiences faces. Even Jesse’s drum malfunctions are woven into the performance. CKY is a band with enormous talent. With cleverly crafted songs, with complex riffs and sing-a-long lyrics, they prove themselves to be a band that enjoys what they do, and they make sure their fans leave more than satisfied. 

Dan Brown releases yet another adventure of Robert Langdon loose upon the literary scene. The book is a sequel to Angels and Demons and The Divinci code, and matches them both in its pace and its genius of being well researched, delivering an exhilarating journey which Dr Langdon makes ever more enjoyable with his wit, humour and his famous knowledge of symbology and cryptography.   However, despite the ‘could that really happen’ factor, the novel as a whole seems somewhat shallow, for an indescribable reason, perhaps the expectation that Brown should give deep, insightful and ultimately a heart warming narrative. It unfortunately lacks this; many have said that his wallet has replaced his heart and I believe that this is possibly true. But looking back through Brown’s history and remembering his ‘Digital Fortress’ novel which I thoroughly disliked because of the lack of substance and over-indulgence in pace and novelistic arrogance, I don’t think it will be a trait that will continue.

Many have said that his wallet has replaced his heart

All in all, a good read, a better read if you don’t compare it too heavily to Angels and Demons and The Divinci Code. .

DVD Family Guy Season 8 Laura Patricia

Anyone who knows me knows I am an obsessive Family Guy fan. So it will come as no surprise to them that I have had this item on pre-order since May. Or that I have given it such a high rating. But then we are talking about the genius of Seth MacFarlane, and there is very little to dole out but praise. If you have not yet discovered that the bird is the word, I highly recommend this DVD set. Remember that this was a show that was historically cancelled and then resurrected by DVD sales, and spend your money generously. In return, you’ll get 13 new episodes, including plenty of gags and sequences cut from TV; with “all the poops and farts and nudity intact”, as Peter would put it. There are also, for the hardcore nerds like me, com-

mentaries on each episode, deleted scenes, and even a behind the scenes tour of the production offices which will make wannabe sitcom writers drool in envy! Season 8 really offers nothing new, just more of the same characters and laughs you know and love. This will be the last season to feature Cleveland (before he leaves for his spin off) and I don’t want to give anything away, but this might also be the last we see of the un-funny Evil Monkey for a while. Plus, Bonnie next door FINALLY has her baby! High points include Peter adopting a new dog to replace an aging Brian, Stewie’s time machine, and the return of the inimitable James Woods. If you’re a regular viewer or if you just enjoy quirky insult humour, then Season 8 will not disappoint. So why only the four star rating? Simply, because this isn’t them at their best. The jokes have gotten less clever

and more in your face. Perhaps this is just because I have been watching more American Dad lately, but the cutaways and setups seem clunky and contrived; and it seems like the plot is getting more and more far fetched in the search for more outrageous humour. What used to be hilariously esoteric sometimes now seems merely vaguely random.

If you have not yet discovered that the bird is the word, I highly recommend this

When insulting celebrities, it is the same ones who take the hits time after time, and occasionally the crude jokes

go just that little bit too far. Some of them make it patently clear why they were unacceptable for mainstream TV, and with good reason, says the little bit of a prude left in me. Also, some gags seem to go on a tad too long at times, as though the writers didn’t know how to end it and just kept going, even though the joke and the punch-line have both already been hit. But then again, as Brian put it: “If you don’t like it, go complain on the Internet”... If you’re a big fan or a semi-interested viewer, then this is new material to satisfy you. And it’s laugh out loud funny at times. But if you’re new to the show, or trying to sell it on someone, seasons 3/4/5 are much better samples to turn to. Worth having around the house though, and I’m still in love enough to have told my Amazon account to email me the second Season 9 goes on sale!


Purple Wednesdays Wednesday 18th November 2009


Expanded horizons ‘What appealed to me about the structure of this course was the flexibility and scope for independent study within your area of interest. The course at Portsmouth involves not only the history department, but academics from other disciplines within the University who get involved by running guest seminars.’ Zoe Denness, MA History of War, Culture and Society

Swimming University of Portsmouth Swim Team (UPST) members have been making a splash at the Mountbatten Centre this year training hard for the season ahead. UPST training, double the number of days as last year, are proud to have the opportunity to use the newly refurbished pool at the Mountbatten Centre in Hilsea. With the closure of the Victoria Swimming Centre, UPST fought hard to ensure all swim team members could get the best training facility in Portsmouth. President Jack ‘Pirate’ Smith said: “It’s been a tough challenge getting everybody to be able to swim at Mountbatten - it’s not as easily accessible for the team being out in Hilsea. “It might be more expensive in terms of travelling but the pool is a far better quality, so we’re happy that everybody gets the chance to swim there.” Tom Marsters, the Men’s Captain, said: “The teams have been training really hard so far. Pre-season training went well and with many new swim-

mers joining the competitive teams, I think we really have the chance to push ourselves to the limit.” The British Universities and Colleges Sport squad dove into their first season competing at Sheffield on Friday November 13 to Sunday November 15. If you fancy coming along to a swimming session, do not hesitate to contact the team at swimming@upsu. net or find them on the University of Portsmouth Swim Team Facebook group. All sessions are held at the Mountbatten Centre and are as follows:

Tuesday 8 - 9pm (25m) - All swimmers welcome Wednesday 2 - 4pm (25m) - All swimmers welcome Thursday 7 - 8.30pm (25m) - BUCS Squad Only Friday 7.30 - 8:45am (50m) - BUCS Squad only

Netball Camilla Hoppitt

Portsmouth 6ths VS. Imperial College 2nds – 4th Nov

Do a Master’s, change your life Postgraduate information days • Thursday 26 November 2009 • Tuesday 16 March 2010 • Tuesday 7 September 2010 11.30am–2.00pm and 5.00pm–7.00pm. Purple Door, 28 Guildhall Walk Portsmouth PO1 2DD. Drop in or book an appointment online at

After watching both the 2nds and 3rds comfortably win their matches, it was the 6ths team’s go to give Imperial College a run for their money. With a slow start in the first quarter and a couple of slips and slides due to the rain that decided to grace us, we soon became disheartened at the thought of not carrying on the winning streak of the day. With optimistic fresher Alexis and motivational words from Hayley Warren, we went back on court determined to pull it back. Fresher Holly Formstone put in a brilliant effort, holding her space well in the circle as a previously untried Goal Keep. In the 2nd quarter we start to play better as a team, with excellent back up from defence Fresher Ellie Braun and Oldie Hayley Warren who

were always offering when things were tough in the attacking third. With our defence growing stronger as the game went on and some great rebounds from both Leanne Parrot and Tiff Chalcraft we found ourselves closing the gap. The more we started to pull away, the more aggravated Imperial seemed to become, and we came off from the third quarter having pulled away, leading by 4 goals to make the score 18-14. This was definitely our best quarter with great interceptions from Ellie in defence and Steph Mandy’s play in the circle. With a tough last quarter the end result was a draw of 20-20. Well played by everyone as we knew it was going to be a tough game, we kept fighting for it the whole time and never gave them an easy ride. Player of the match went to the well deserved Hayley Warren, who was on form for the whole game. Once again, well played girls.


Purple Wednesdays Wednesday 18th November 2009


Netball Jordan Byrne and Niki Wakefield

After being promoted into division one, Portsmouth 1sts played their first home game against reigning champions, Brighton 1sts.  After a long week of training, for what we perceived as our hardest match of the season, we arrived at Langstone focused and prepared. Following a thorough warm-up we took our positions on court and started brightly taking an 8 – 5 lead. The second quarter got off to a fierce start with Brighton fighting back, and stepped the game up to win the second quarter 15 – 13. An encouraging team talk at half time helped the team

Mountain Biking to refocus and turn the game around. We went into the final quarter with a 3 goal lead, however, this didn’t last long as Brighton fought back to make it equal. Goals were consistently scored end to end until we picked up our game to win 33 – 29. This was a great win as Portsmouth have not beaten Brighton 1st for 3 years. Our shooting duo Gill and fresher Tasha were on top form as were our solid defence Hayley and fresher Sally. The dynamic centre court, Niki, Jordan and Nicola worked well to fight off the opposition and confirm the win.  Final Score-33-29. Player of the Match - Sally Tibbets

Canoeing The University of Portsmouth Canoe Club is a vibrant, active and very social club, gettting up to many activities and antics from Kayaking in Slovenia and France to Fireworks and Playzone. This year we have had one of our biggest intakes of freshers and so far have ran two very successful trips which everyone enjoyed. Just after lectures on a Friday we all rocked up to prepare for this years Freshers trip. 25 of us piled into vehicles with brand new kit and kayaks ready for a year of exciting paddling. Our destination was South Wales and the freshers were excited. The games started on the bus on the way up as nervous newbies, to the club where we got to know everyone. After a few hours everyone was having a whale of a time. We eventually reached our rural destination, tucked away in the Brecon Beacons National Park. Here we set up camp for the night in a cosy scout hut. This was followed by many games and team building activities, these being important canoe club traditions dating back years. Eventually, everyone settled down for the night after preparing kit for the next days paddling. The next morning we were greeted by the welcome smell of frying bacon as the committee got the breakfast going. Bleary eyed freshers were woken ready for the fun day ahead. Our destination was the lower part of the Wye Valley at Symonds Yat. This was to be an introduction to kayaking on flat

moving water so that new members of the club could be taught basic technique which they have already learnt in the pool and increase their confidence on the open river. We kitted up and headed up river to a large slide where the more adventurous among us took on the challenge of charging down into the river. The next challenge was the Symonds Yat rapids, this was the freshers first encounter of light rapids where the techniques of eddying out and ferrying across the river were practised. After an hour of furious paddling, everyone had learnt the new moves. We then prepared for the next day where we would attempt the Usk river. After people had finished their bacon sandwiches, we loaded up the van and headed deeper into the National Park ready to develop freshers paddling skills further. Split into two groups with river leaders at the head, we embarked from Talybont Bridge and onwards down the scenic river. After encountering a few small drops we reached Mill Falls, the first challenge of the year. After only two swims we made it to the the ‘Get Out’. There were many smiling faces as we packed up ready to depart for Portsmouth. This had been another successful weekend as new members were introduced to paddling, preparing them for the many trips to come, including the upcoming River Dart.

Mez Eldridge-Tull

Portsmouth Mountain Bike Downhill Team kicked off their race season with some great results from the first round of the UK Bike Park’s Winter Series held at Blanford in Dorset. UK Bike Park has a great reputation for racing and is perfect for those who are first time racers. British cycling points are up for grabs for licence holders and there is a huge turnout of racers including some of the best mountain bikers in the country. Despite the fact that the weather would make a trip to the Arctic more appealing the team had high spirits. As the race atmosphere set in and the Monster Energy Drink started flowing, the riders battled their way through the harsh conditions the track threw at them. Jonnny Howe started off his first

year at Portsmouth with a fantastic race coming in 5th in the Junior Men’s, putting him 28th overall in the rankings, just behind Tom Clennet coming 11th in the Senior Men’s. Tom Puxley had a crash during his first race run and was determined to make up for it in his 2nd run.  The 3rd year came flying down the hill knocking 10 seconds off his first run to put him in 8th in the Senior’s and 22nd overall.  Lewis Pendle got the fastest time for the club that day, coming in 5th in Senior’s, being his best result to date.  As BC licence holders, Tom Puxley and Lewis received points towards racing at national and international levels. This has been a very promising start to the year for the club and with great enthusiasm from the members and plenty of big events round the country, we hope to see some more top results.

Editoral Liam Ryder

Give the refs a break, Fergie! Welcome to the first of my columns, where I’ll be expressing my opinion (for what it’s worth) on the week’s sports news in the most impartial manner I can. The biggest game of the Premier League weekend was Chelsea’s 1-0 win over Manchester United. With such a big match came controversy as United Manager Sir Alex Ferguson yet again weighed in on the referee’s decisions regarding the game’s only goal. Ferguson is becoming notorious for complaining about referees when the game doesn’t go his way, and it’s a great shame that arguably the greatest manager in the UK has become tarred with this brush. There is no denying he is a master tactician but the more he complains the harder he is making it on himself.  Although Ferguson may have a point, in my opinion, referee Martin Atkinson’s performance surrounding the goal was not great. But the fact remains that thanks to his new reputation, Ferguson can no longer

be taken seriously during post-match interviews.

Although Ferguson may have a point, in my opinion, referee Martin Atkinson’s performance surrounding the goal was not great

The best thing to do now would be to stay quiet for a while, commenting honestly and decently (avoiding confrontation and just saying you can’t get it all – unless perhaps you’re at Old Trafford) and then, when a decision like the one on Sunday shapes a close game the way it did, clamping down by giving a frank, honest opinion on said decision without harsh criticism. Maybe then, we’ll be able to start believing Ferguson is more than just a bad loser.

Sport » Wakeboarding

Sport » Boxing

Sport » Boxing

Pompey Wake takes to the Lake

Boxing cont

Boxing results

One cold day in November, 40 members of the Wakeboarding Club climbed onto buses and coaches in search of a good day out at the lake. Along the way, they found good times and found that joining Wakeboarding was a good decision! In total, this trip included 32 members who are brand new to the sport. With the help of the staff at Jbski and older members these members learnt the basics of kneeboarding and wakeboarding, whilst testing out the temperature of the lake which was, to say the least, a bit cold. Regardless of how well they progressed, everyone had a good day at the lake. We were impressed with everyone who came and gave it a go.

I would come out in one piece. Celebration had to be kept to a minimum as I went straight back to the changing room to help out the others yet to perform. At the end of the evening, all the boxers gathered in the changing room to make merry with a pint in our hands, but only the one as some of the boxers where yet to battle later that week. I prepared well for the occasion with my mannish grey cardigan and white v-neck shirt whilst others were still in their drippy red stained boxing vests saturated in sweat. We drank our pints in quick fashion to squeeze out any buzz you can possibly get from just a pint and soon left the building with reminiscing thoughts that carried our battered bodies to our beds.

K Beard Wpts v Donohugh (Navy) C Lau Wpts v Mckinell (Lauceston) L Caldwell Wpts v Borett (Ventnor) H Al-Abaddey Wpts v Woodman (Swansea) Douglas (Ventnor) Wpts v Kilcoin (Swansea) Insam Wpts v Gare (UWE) Georgakakis Wpts v Harper (Ventnor) Natwar Lpts v Bellamy (Bath) Mitchell Wpts v Atwell (UWE) Lawless (LSB) Wpts v Gare (Bath) C Lewis Wpts v Kouriandas (Bath) Walker Wpts v Pipe (Gosport) R ColQuhoun Wpts v Farag (Bath)

We would like to say a massive thank you to all the people that made the day such a success; the old members that came down to lend support, JBwaterski for providing the facilities and coaching, Elaina for her patience in helping to organise transport etc and Fresh for driving the minibus! But most importantly to all the members, it wouldn’t be the same without you. Remember “Life Is A Lake”!

If you’re interested in joining the wakeboard team, email:

Females lead the way at Portsmouth Boxing Show Hisham Al-Abbadey

“Sam Shulman” Wayne Gardiner

Portsmouth University held their annual show on 10th Nov 09 at Liquid & Envy nightclub in Portsmouth. With tickets only £6 each, the place was rammed with over 700 people and an atmosphere worthy of any championship final. The whole team performed incredibly, winning 10 out of 11 home bouts, with not a single stoppage on the cards - proving fair matching.  The boxer of the night went to team captain Paul Mitchell who won a unanimous decision against D Atwell from UWE, taking him forward to the quarter finals

of the English University Championships, which will take place on Sat 14th Dec 09. Two females made their debut at the show and performed remarkably. Kat Beard, at 58kg, had a very aggressive bout against local Navy girl Donohugh. The fight swung backwards and forwards with Kat clinching the decision due to her ever persistent jab. Carmen Lau ended up being the penultimate bout of the evening (Bout 12) due to Lauceston and their boxers getting delayed for 5 hours in a motorway incident.  At this point I must say thanks to the officials, doctor and especially the Lauceston coach and boxer.  The bout was very

well contested with Carmen winning due to her high work rate; both girls embraced and had smiles that showed their pride at the end. Coach Wayne Gardiner commented, saying he was very proud of the participants, the venue was amazing and the crowd were phenomenal; “I can honestly say that as I took the first boxer to the ring, I had to hold my breath in shock at the size and electricity of the crowd, a fantastic evening.” If anyone has any questions regarding the club or University Boxing in general please contact me: or visit the website:

I am the welterweight boxer for Portsmouth University Boxing club. Currently I’m still a fresher although have been with the boxing team for the last two years. Still one of the babies of the club with a lot to learn on common sense and responsibility, even though I am quite experienced in the square circle of the boxing world. I would like to share on my experience of my 15th bout, which also turned out to be a successful evening for Portsmouth University Boxing as we came away with 10 wins out of 11 bouts As I enter Liquid/Envy, the site of the boxing ring being set up sends a shot of excitement down my spine. The ring was set up in the middle of the main floor and I began imagining the sight of hundreds of students all around the outside screaming with excitement. The image certainly was nowhere near what the reality soon showed to be. The changing room was situated upstairs in “Envy” so I began practicing my walk down the stairs to ensure I didn’t trip up in front of hundreds of people. The boxing team set up camp in a corner in the room where we all supported each other throughout the whole evening. It was great environment to get focused, apart from the eye candy from the dancers practicing their routine only a few yards away in little hot pants. I personally took a nap for at least an hour because I knew that when I wake up I’ll start feeling hyper. Some boxers were doing some serious ninja shadow boxing in the reflection of windows, but I prefer just to chill and save the ninja stuff for the ring.  Suddenly its 9 o clock and I’m in the ring, geared and ready for action. Electricity from the crowed gave me all the energy I could need so no problem in that department. Coming out to Jay Z “empire state of mind” added to the excitement. I’m feeling a buzz

that is just surreal, and all I wanted to do was unleash fury all over the opponent. Fury from the up hill climb I had to go through to get here, the intense training and strict diet to maintain weight. Not including the build up of pressure over the week all from the thought of performing in front of 700 people. It’s hard enough trying to keep up with studies and training let alone have that constant worry hanging over your head. Worry of injury or embarrassment or even both stirring the mind. None the less, all these mix emotions had to be pushed aside as within the next few seconds I would have to perform. I knew if I let my emotions get the better of me it would only lead to scrappy brawl which could cost me the bout so I had to remain focused.     From the first bell onwards, I found it a struggle to keep the concentration but remained with a positive attitude throughout. The constant chanting from your home crowd never helps as they scream “knock him out Hishy”, and every punch I would land would set off a huge roar! I did my absolutely best to remain composed but inside I just wanted to stand square in front of the bloke and keep none stop pounding, regardless if I got hit. I remained tactical and decisive in every move I made, which kept most of the opponent’s punches at bay and landing mine with accuracy. In the corner my coach would recharge me by prompting me to through more shots with the right hand “What’s up? You forgot you’ve got two hands! Throw the rear!” It was beneficial because by the time it got to the last round, I was landed punches “left, right and Chelsea”, as my coach put it.  The focused energy paid off as I came out with the unanimous win and no marks on my face. It was a fantastic walking through the crowd and shaking the hands of the hyped up fresher’s who were absolutely buzzing, as well as greeting my relieved sisters who were worried whether

Continued on page 15

Sport » American Football

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Portsmouth players to represent Great Britain

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Ben Peddie

The Portsmouth Destroyers are proud to announce that on the 14th November, Defensive Tackle Edson Bras will be representing the university in a friendly fixture for the senior Great Britain Lions against France. Edson started playing American Football in the 2007 season where he was a complete rookie to the sport. Edson also plays for the current senior British Premier Champions the London Blitz, where he started as Defensive Tackle and has just won the award of newcomer of the year. In his short time playing the Edson has not only become one of the best Defensive Tackles in

the British University American Football League (BUAFL) but also the British American Football League (BAFL), with his effort being rewarded by a call up to the National squad. With the senior European Championships fast approaching in 2010, two more Portsmouth Destroyers are looking to make the travelling squad. Offensive Lineman Ben Peddie was invited to a GB Workout with ambitions of making the France squad, but due to injury, was unable to be selected. Hopefully Ben will make the full squad in the near future, having impressed after coming off an undefeated season with BAFL1 Champions the London Cobras. Defensive Tackle James Perrineau also looks to make

the European Championship squad after gaining experience of the highest level playing for the Seinajoki Crocodiles in Finland. Honourable mentions also go to 3 of the Destroyers Coaches Defensive Co-ordinator, James Irving, Offensive Co-ordinator , Alex Phillips and linebacker coach, Dale Powell as they have also been selected to represent Great Britian. With the Destroyers Team having such high level of players and coaches they look to have a very successful season. The season kicked off on the 8th November against Imperial Immortals with a comprehensive 82-0 victory, putting them 1-0 on the season. With the 1st home game on the 22nd No-

vember against Warwick, with a new home kit and new look, make sure you come to ROKO in Hilsea and see what talent the Destroyers have on display.

Edson Bras will be representing the university in a friendly fixture for the senior Great Britain Lions against France

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Pugwash News Issue 33  

Pugwash News Issue 33 - 18/11/2009

Pugwash News Issue 33  

Pugwash News Issue 33 - 18/11/2009