Here at the of the
Pedro Sim達o O. Mendes
© 2013 by Pedro Simão O. Mendes. Pedro Simão O. Mendes retains sole copyright to all photographs and poems in this book.
Here at the end of the world
I had the feeling I might be lost. So, inspired by the end of things and the solitude of being lonesome, I went on a journey to try to find myself again. This book contains some of the things Iâ€™ve encountered on the journey. It is about the end of the world as I know it, about the endless nights I endure alone and the cold they bring to my soul and heart. It is also about death, because after death there is nothing, just like after the cold and dark night, there is nothing as well. Only the end of the world. And the end of the world is where I am right now.
Crimson I am craving to greet death With a kiss. Like two past lovers who reunite After so long.
Oh, and the bliss Of feeling your warm breath Where it belongs, My lips, my heart are yours to ignite.
Crimson my eyes and skin And blow away what lies within Because I am nothing but blood and sins And now the end of my world begins.
my eyes are shadows all this time I was longing for the colors but they were already there and I didn’t see. now they are gone, I carry on seeing black and gray and white as if there was nothing but night.
the end of the world began yesterday and brought all the colors back for me to witness brighter and more alive than ever before. I still can’t see. I am sightless.
my eyes are shadows and my heart feels like lead. perhaps because it’s dead.
«the moon danced like a mushroom»
postcard from the end of the world in a dream, I walked into the sea, naked skin and boiling cold water. the waves whispered your name and sang a song of love and, from the depths of the world I saw a red tower, a lighthouse upside-down twisted a light in the dark and I entered a secret door where the moon danced like a mushroom.
I woke up. now, the waves have nothing to say, they are quiet and the light is out.
I saw the fog emerge In the dark sea there was fire and the flames Were touching the blue sky filled with the black giant wings Of wicked birds. A storm brewed, the wind froze my skin and flooded my lungs. My veins burst and from my eyes and my ears dribbled blood, I fell on my knees on the wet sand and the stormy waters kissed my body. My drenched bones broke and I was carried to the depths of the ocean. And from underwater I saw the fog emerge on the surface As if it was trying to cover the beauty of the end of the world For no one else to see.
Here at the end of the world the silenced surroundings trembled, cold air and wasted land crumbled. how many tides have swept away the warmth the old days would bring our eyes, so blurred? there is nothing left but stone. here we are to stay alone at the end of the world.
Burning water The water burns on my skin And drips from my lips and hands
Alone I sat Soaked and drenched.
Here, naked I sit The water burns And the air freezes I scream inside. Cleansed and alone Under the burning water I scream.
Born in death I am In the midst of cold dark waters I was. Alone in the dark, slowly, I drowned. A storm extinguished a fire above me And flying birds dived into the sea shrieking. The waves, silent, had nothing left to say. So they sang. The waves sang and danced the tempestuous song of death, Rocked my empty body and I was born again.
A grievous nightmare The night was warm, The sky was coal And sketches of grey clouds prowled a red moon. There was the scent of blood in the air And I went through the forest unaware Of the monsters who lived there. I carried my heavy sword silvery shining And painted ruby all the treetops But the end of the world did not stop. There was still the reek of blood in the air And it all seemed like a grievous nightmare.
In the end, the blood was on my hands And the moon was white and high in the sky. I could not understand How it was glowing while it all ended.
I glimpsed a dragonfly above my eyes Before I went back home. It was burning, just like everything else.
Let us cry together Let us cry together, while singing the only song we know. Let us close our eyes, while shaking from that fear only we know.
Undress your eyelids like wet paper and look up.
Look up, it doesnâ€™t rain anymore.
endless nights the sun is setting again and I still sit alone the night will come soon and the monsters will wake me in the dark and they will whisper in my ears a sad and lonesome song about the endless nights and tomorrow will never come.
before the night before the night there will be cold and blood will fall from the sky as it snows and Iâ€™ll know our own winter will have ended. and even if snow is silence blood is screams and shrieks and pain.
so I stole the sun away, I hid it inside a paper bag surrounded by sackcloth, so I have a light to guide me in those cold dark nights where those big yellow eyes stare at me. stare at us.
the golden blue, the silvery red alone as I am, colorless my voice sings and the heavens cry blood and ice. the golden blue, the silvery red they all fall through and the silence wakes you up. you open your eyes and cry as well. you’re safe and sound, I’m buried underground. I sing aloud a quiet shriek there’s no one there and no one hears the golden blue, the silvery red.
«snow is silence»
the night comes I smile naked and wet I’ve been born again the sun brought me back a new day has come I sleep I dream I am happy for a moment silence is everything
and the sky is blue but the night comes back
I sleep simply not to be
and I die again.
in your absence
oh, the night comes back
so cold as dead itself.
and I’m dead again.
but even sleeping I dream nothing but death.
though a new day may come, I’ll wake only when I see you.
in the dark don’t you cry, little dove they will find us if you do. don’t you hide from me, my love ‘cause I will find you too.
those eyes in the dark, they see us.
when the world ends and all the colors have been gone, they’ll see us better in the dark.
those eyes in the night, they see us.
Just night I never went out of this place And there is no world to see. The night consumed it whole
Still the moon
And bled it dried. There is no end to this night. There is no end to this darkness Nor end to its destruction. There is no end. Just night.
I listen to happiness as I close my eyes in the dark. Its tone surrounds me and fills me whole. I see the bright moonshine And all the colors it brings in the darkness of eyes closed, No longer just black and white and grey. No longer a world of grey. No longer the world, â€˜cause there is no world to see. It ended when I closed my eyelids, It ended in the dark. It died.
But there is still the moon.
One day death came in the night, all whispers and kisses from her bloody mouth. she came for me in the sea, where time stops and north meets south.
I lay with her and licked the blood she gifted me with. the storm ended and my dead heart beat again. submersed in new life I went home
Dust and ash
through the forever lasting night and slept. The world ended, everything was dead Here, at the end of the world, is where I lie, alone in the dark. I dream only of the light, but no light will come for me.
but the moon. It showed me the path of destruction where it, pale, shone.
but one day, Iâ€™ll wake and there will be light again. The embers slowly faded until all was left was dust and ash. I grabbed some and poured it out in the air and cried. It was still night.
green in the night
The place where the world is once more
ashes poured out in the wind
Wrecked, I lay down
sing about a stormy sea tranquillized.
like a ship â€“ lost at sea â€“
tears merged, salted diamonds washing faces and souls
tired of this journey to nowhere.
broken by a world that ended with the night. All ashes I am a tiny little seed is watered and, bathed in pain, it blooms.
reborn at shore,
but will it grow, without light?
I float at the surface
or will it die, like everything else?
face down and see air bubbles and a tree top full of leaves dancing in the waves behind a glowing sun, ever burning, never ending.
In the place where the world is once more, alone still, I emerge and breathe in the light. Wrecked, I breathe.
Death is now Dreadful nights, Endless And troubled. The wolves cry and Howl far away.
I can’t shut my eyes, Sleep won’t come.
No one will ever look Over here, Where I died.
a different sun the sun comes up, still shining, still warm, but different from before.
of this day Iâ€™ve dreamt through the forever lasting night and finally I woke but its light someone broke so it will never shine again the way it shone before.
Here at the end of the world contains 34 images photographed in the year 2013 by Pedro Simão O. Mendes, divulged on the author’s website, as well as 23 poems written between 25th December 2012 and 12th December 2013, with some divulged on the authors blog.
© 2013 Pedro Simão O. Mendes
«I had the feeling I might be lost. So, inspired by the end of things and the solitude of being lonesome, I went on a journey to try to find...